Shows
Well Enough Alone - A Guide To Thriving SoloCyndi Darnell: Sex and the single life – intimacy, sexuality and non-traditional relationshipsThis week’s episode is a really juicy one so buckle up! Can we have a fulfilling, safe and healthy sex life when we’re unpartnered? Is sex an essential part of the human experience or are there other ways to find intimacy? Our guest this week is Cyndi Darnell, a certified clinical sexologist, psychotherapist and couple's counsellor based in New York. She works with singles, traditional couples and people in open, polyamorous, kinky and consensual non monogamous relationships. She walks us through what sex...2025-03-0252 min
The A to Z of SexEncore: M is for Mismatched Desire/Libido with Cyndi DarnellEncore: M is for Mismatched Desire/Libido with Cyndi Darnell and Dr Lori Beth Bisbey2025-01-2749 minThe A to Z of SexEncore: M is for Mismatched Desire/Libido with Cyndi DarnellEncore: M is for Mismatched Desire/Libido with Cyndi Darnell and Dr Lori Beth Bisbey2025-01-2749 min
Wild & Sublime"Sex When You Don't Feel Like It" with Cyndi Darnell [rebroadcast]Send us a textDo you and your partner have mismatched libidos? In this fascinating interview that turns many long-held ideas on their head, sexologist and author Cyndi Darnell talks about her book that helps people connect to their authentic desires and build connection. [Rebroadcast] In Chicago on Saturday May 4? Get tix to our live show and podcast recording!Buy Sex When You Don't Feel Like It on Bookshop, our affiliate partner.In this episode:Cyndi Darnell - Sex & relationship therapist, clinical & somatic sexologistBuy Sex When You Don't Feel L...2024-05-0245 min
See You On The Other Side45 | Sex When You Don't Feel Like It (with Cyndi Darnell)Send us a textLet's talk about sex! With Cyndi Darnell. A clinical and somatic sexologist and author of Sex, When You Don't Feel Like It: The Truth About Mismatched Libido & Rediscovering Desire. Originally from Australia, she is now based in New York City where where she runs a global consulting practice to clients worldwide. A psychotherapist by training, Cyndi currently supports individuals, couples and polycules navigating relationships and sexual difficulties, plus professional mentorship and case consultations to clinicians and sexologists worldwide seeking to deepen their understanding of the links between psychotherapy, sexology, relationships work and somatic prac...2023-05-151h 15
Why Does My PartnerNeed Sex to Feel Connected While I Need to Feel Connected to Have SexWelcome back to the WDMP Podcast. Today’s question leads us into exploring what we each understand sexual intimacy to mean, and what we can do if that understanding doesn't seem to line up with our partner’s. We’re encouraging you, dear listeners, to start to learn about and understand your own sexual templates: what are your likes and dislikes, what are some of the beliefs you have about what those preferences mean, and what in your history has led you there? When you and your partner each engage in that personal work, then there’s an opportunity to talk...2023-04-1820 min
Culture Sex RelationshipsCyndi Darnell Sex When You Don't Feel Like ItRenowned sex therapist and educator Cyndi Darnell joined me to talk about her amazing book ‘Sex When You Don’t Feel Like It’. We critiqued the idea of libido itself, the importance of curiosity, the new three word model you should be using instead of GGG on Feeld, the importance of allowing the body to speak, why talking about problems is often not helpful, the possibilities for the body to show the path to freedom and connectedness, and the difficulties of being saturated in discourse and how to become resourced.
Here’s a link to the book (I earn a small co...2023-02-101h 00
The Erotic PhilosopherThe Wonderfully Weird History and Science of Masturbation with Dr. Eric SprankleJoin us for the final episode of Season 4 while I take a break for a while and you have time to catch up on all the past episodes you may have missed. While you’re here a HUGE request to please leave us a rating and review on Apple – your reviews make such a difference to our visibility and viability to return with even more episodes. To remain ad free and bullshit free – your support REALLY matters Now this episode’s guest...someone whose internet presence is as witty and acerbic as it is compassionate and insightful. Known on...2023-02-0755 min
The Erotic PhilosopherOpen Deeply: In Conversation with Kate LoreeToday's guest is Kate Loree, is a sex-positive licensed marriage and family therapist with a specialty in non-monogamous, kink, LGBTQ, and sex worker communities and the author of Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships. She cohosts her own sex-positive podcast, Open Deeply, with Sunny Megatron. In this episode Kate and I dig into the work of intimate relationships and she offers insight into how we can show up better in our relationships. We look at how to manage triggers during communication, what to do when a situation feels dire and hopeless and how...2023-02-011h 01
Luvbites by Dr. TaraThe Ways to Increase Sexual Desire EpisodeGet ready to revamp your sexual desire! This week Dr. Tara is determined to uncover the truth about confronting issues of mismatched libido with clinical and somatic sexologist and author of Sex, When You Don't Feel Like It: The Truth About Mismatched Libido & Rediscovering Desire. Cyndi Darnell! A psychotherapist by training, Cyndi currently supports individuals, couples, and polycules navigating relationships and sexual difficulties. In this episode, Cyndi explains the three best ways to rediscover your sexual desire. Either within yourself or with your partner. Cyndi breaks down the causes and effects of mismatched libido and why people would rather...2023-01-3131 min
The Erotic PhilosopherThe History & Truth About Cuckolding with Dr. David LeyThis week is Cuckweek! Who knew? - not me until I recorded this interview with Dr. David Ley, someone whose work I have followed for many years and indeed the world's foremost expert into the world of cukolding, hot wife-ing and the impact of religonn on human sexuality. Dr David Ley is a clinical psychologist, sex therapist and author, based in Albuquerque, New Mexico. He's the author of several books and research articles on sexuality, including his first book, Insatiable Wives, Women Who Stray and the Men Who Love Them, known as the “Bible of Cuckolding.” With Just...2023-01-231h 08
The Erotic PhilosopherWho Is Pleasure Really For? with Goody HowardToday's guest is an absolute delight and I am thrilled to introduce you to Goody Howard. Goody is an award-winning sexologist, educator, and consultant. She provides pleasure development and professional development workshops worldwide. Her authentic and enthusiastic presentation style allows her audiences to connect quickly to the concepts and enjoy learning about sexual health, pleasure, and human variance equity. She makes pleasure-inclusive, comprehensive sex education accessible, intentional, and fun! While Goody’s pleasure-focused offerings are her most popular classes, she also teaches relevant career development workshops for educators, social workers, and healthcare providers. In this in...2023-01-1751 min
The Erotic PhilosopherWhat We Want To Know About Kink with Richard Sprott. PhD.Ever wondered what makes a person kinky? How we define it or what does it mean you’re your partner is into kink and perhaps you are not? Today’s guest is Dr Richard Sprott. received his Ph.D. in Developmental Psychology from UC Berkeley in 1994. He is currently directing research projects focused on identity development and health/well-being in people who express alternative sexualities and non-traditional relationships, with a special emphasis on kink/BDSM sexuality, and polyamory or consensual non-monogamy. He is the Past President of the Society for the Psychology of Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity (APA Divis...2023-01-1746 min
The Erotic PhilosopherSexual Communication Tips with Dr. TaraToday's guest is Dr. Tara Suwinyattichaiporn a sex and relationship expert, tenured professor, relationship coach at Luvbites.co, and host of Luvbites by Dr. Tara Podcast with a bustling social media presence on TikTok. From a shy immigrant from Thailand to a confident sexpert, her goal is to normalize talking about sex in a healthy and fun way. In this episode we learn about Dr Tara's research into sexual communication and we explore what makes sex fulfilling no matter the stage of life yo'ure at or what you're into. Dr Tara asks me about my e...2022-12-2856 min
The Erotic PhilosopherReclaiming Pleasure and Surviving Sexual Assault with Dr Holly RichmondIn this episode we meet Dr. Holly Richmond - a Somatic Psychotherapist, Certified Sex Therapist, and Clinical Board Member for Dame Products. Her newly released book Reclaiming Pleasure: A Sex-Positive Guide for Moving Past Sexual Trauma and Living a Passionate Life (New Harbinger, Oct. 2021) is an innovative look at both somatic and psychological factors in survivors’ erotic recovery. In this interview we look at what it takes to recover from sexual assault, what SA even is, we bust some myths about who this affects and where /how it happens and how to begin on the road to recovery. A pow...2022-12-2844 min
The Erotic PhilosopherPower, Empowerment, Vulnerability & Squirting with LolaJeanIn this episode we meet Lola Jean. A Sex Educator, Fetish Wrestler, ProDomme, and World Record Holder for Volume Squirting (solo). She provides the 'No Frills Sex Education' we both need and deserve. Lola brings a refreshing understanding to sex, sexuality, and kink to invite individuals through what they think they are capable of. In this episode Lola Jean talks to us about her signature squirting demos, but then we take an intimate turn into how LolaJean deals with performance pressure, sexual and emotional anxiety and why vulnerability is a normal part of life we all caln learn from. ...2022-12-2847 min
Scarlet SocietyWhat If Everything We’ve Been Taught about Sex Is Untrue? with Cyndi DarnellEven in today's modern age, not many people openly talk about sex with their partner or their family members and friends. Discussions around sex require vulnerability which people are not always willing to do. Sex and pleasure are nuanced and personal. It's magical, and it's different for all of us. In this episode, Cyndi Darnell sheds light on the topic of sex that very few have done before, and that's by providing an unlearning of the messages and conditioning we've been fed, no matter our sexual preference or gender. She offers a new way of expanding our v...2022-12-1537 min
The Erotic PhilosopherYour Brain on Pleasure with Dr Nan WiseDr. Nan Wise is a certified sex therapist, relationship specialist, neuroscience researcher, and author of Why Good Sex Matters: Understanding the Neuroscience of Pleasure for a Smarter, Happier, and More Purpose-Filled Life. Her research has addressed gaps in the literature regarding the neural basis of human sexuality and garnered international attention. Her clinical approach highlights the critical role our evolutionarily wired-in “core” emotions play in physical and mental well-being. Imbalances in these core emotions contribute to anxiety, depression, stress-related disorders, and sexual dysfunction, and anhedonia, or the inability to experience pleasure. This pleasure crisis is evidenced by soar...2022-12-0954 min
Sex Ed Shouldn't SuckSex When You Don't Feel Like It with Cyndi DarnellThis week we talked to Cyndi Darnell, author and sex therapist from Australia, all about her new book "Sex When You Don't Feel Like It." She tells us about how her clients inspired her to research pleasure and desire, offers sage advice on how to talk to intimate partners, and basically gives us both a free therapy session on the pod!
If you like this episode of the podcast, definitely go purchase and read a copy of Cyndi's book, "Sex When You Don't Feel Like It." For a chance to win a free copy, check out our I...2022-12-0254 min
The Erotic PhilosopherSoma Cultural Liberation with Dr Roger KuhnThis week's guest Dr Roger Kuhn is a Poarch Creek Two-Spirit Indigequeer soma-cultural activist, artist, sex therapist, and sexuality educator. Roger’s work explores the concepts of decolonizing and unsettling sexuality and focuses on the way culture impacts and informs our bodily experiences. In addition to his work as a licensed psychotherapist, Roger is a faculty lecturer of American Indian Studies at San Francisco State University. He is a board member of the American Indian Cultural Center of San Francisco, a community organizer of the Bay Area American Indian Two-Spirit powwow, and a member of the LGBTQ+ Advisory Commi...2022-12-0158 min
The Erotic PhilosopherSpeaking From The Heart: A Practical Guide To The Modern Love Languages with Anne Hodder-ShippIf you've ever felt conflicted about your relationship to love, romance and even how you love, you're going to enjoy today's guest Anne Hodder-Shipp an award-winning certified sex and relationship educator dedicated to providing accurate, expansive, and compassionate care. They are the founder and lead educator at Everyone Deserves Sex Ed, a sex ed and professional development organization, and they work with people and couples of almost any age to help build skills, knowledge, and confidence around identity, pleasure, relationships, and communication. Most recently, Anne wrote the groundbreaking expansive love language ebook, Speaking from the Heart: 18 Languages for Modern L...2022-11-2443 min
The Erotic PhilosopherEnding Childhood Sexual Abuse with Ignacio G. Hutía Xeiti RiveraIgnacio G. Hutía Xeiti Rivera (they/elle), M.A., is a cultural sociologist with expertise in sexual trauma, healing, and liberation for marginalized people. They are an internationally known gender non-conforming speaker, trainer, and consultant. Ignacio is the Founder and Co-Executive Director at The HEAL Project, where they work to prevent and end Childhood Sexual Abuse (CSA). Ignacio is the co-host of 'Caution: Unrestricted', a survivor-centered talk show inviting everyone to engage with the Culture of Sexual Violence through brutal, and at times sarcastic, truth-telling. They are the co-developer of the Rivera-Azad Sexual Healing Integration Model (RASHIM). Learn m...2022-11-1756 min
The Erotic PhilosopherSex after Prostate Cancer with Eric G SchneiderIn this episode I am rejoined by my dear friend Eric G. Schneider who you met in Season 3, but this time he joins me to discuss his very personal experience of with surviving and living with the effects of prostate cancer and its impact on his relationship and his sex life. Eric's willingness to share his story here is a cruicial aspect of our collective healing work - insofar that few men discuss or extrapolate the emotional and personal impact this condition has on them, their relationships and their sex lives. Men and the people who love t...2022-11-0955 min
The Couples Therapist Couch174: Eroticism in Couples Therapy with Cyndi DarnellFind out more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle In this episode, Cyndi Darnell talks about how we need to change the way we talk about sex, gender, pleasure, and power. We also discuss some of the mistakes that therapists make when talking about sex with their clients. To find out more about Cyndi Darnell visit cyndidarnell.com The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. Please subscribe t...2022-11-0348 min
The Erotic PhilosopherHow We Bond, Relationship Satisfaction & Raising Children In Polyamorous HouseholdsWelcome back to Season 4 of The Erotic Philosopher. In this episode we talk with Dr Eli Sheff, one of the world's foremost relationships researchers. Dr. Elisabeth “Eli” Sheff is a researcher, expert witness, coach and educator. With a PhD in Sociology and certification as a Sexuality Educator from AASECT, Dr. Eli specializes in gender and sexual minority families, consensual non-monogamy, and kink/BDSM. Sheff is the foremost academic expert on polyamorous families with children, and her 25+ year Polyamorous Family Study is the only longitudinal study of poly families with children to date. Dr. Eli has served as faculty at seve...2022-11-021h 07
The Erotic PhilosopherBringing Sex Educaton into the 21st Century with Justin HancockIn this final episode for season three we finish by completing the circle of sex education with Justin Hancock. Justin is a sex and relationships educator, trainer and practitioner working with young people and adults in this field since 1999. His website BISHuk.com is one of the leading sex and relationships advice websites for all those over 14. It receives thousands of visits per day and is highly regarded by young people and practitioners alike. Justin has worked in schools, colleges, universities, and youth projects for over 20 years delivering relationships & sex education (RSE) with young people over 14. 2022-08-0351 min
The Erotic PhilosopherThe Wheel Of Consent Revolution with Dr Betty MartinYou may not have heard of the Wheel of Consent, but you really should. So much more than consent as a Yes / No transaction, "The Wheel" as its referred to in sexology circles, offers a frame work through which we can discuss sex , pleasure, power and so much more. This really is the sex education all of us should have received in high school, but I am certain none of us did. To me, the wheel is one of the most powerful revolutions in sex education in a generation and today's guest is te creator of that...2022-07-2942 minWild & Sublime"Sex When You Don't Feel Like It" with Cyndi DarnellSend us a textKaren interviews sexologist Cyndi Darnell about her new book that helps you connect to your authentic desires and work with mismatched libidos within partnership.In this episode:Cyndi Darnell - Sex & relationship therapist, clinical & somatic sexologistBuy Sex When You Don't Feel Like It: The Truth about Mismatched Libido and Rediscovering Desire on Bookshop – support independent booksellers and Wild & Sublime when you buy through our link! Plus many more sex & relationship book recs. Prefer to read the convo? Full episode transcripts are available on our website.2022-07-2844 min