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Empty The TankKnife to the Kranium Ben Affleck and Hemp/CBD/THC infused seltzers help us get this one started. Ben don’t really look like a people person and are these infused seltzers a placebo?Evan takes us into his first day at the his new place of employment. Yes, Evan is back to the 9 to 5 employment format. Bets for how long this will last are being taken as we speak. Just DM the ETT page to inquire on odds.The boys then decipher multiple types of “shit” words. Horseshit, apeshit, bullshit, dogshit, and batshit capture our attention for the better...2022-07-2947 minEmpty The TankEfficient Twerking and PBJ Bacon SandwichesIts hot... as fuck. But we (and you) are here. Empty The Tank is an all weather and all season show.At inception, we pay homage to Matt Vasgersian and John Madden, and invent an alarm clock that involves a morning visit from THE Eric Byrnes.After that, well, we descend into chaos.The legend of Miss Twerksum is told, and Meg the Stallion continues to keep us in a headlock that we will not fight. We also discern the difference between twerking and "moving one's waistline". An important distinction for the culture.2022-07-201h 10Empty The TankSometimes The Greats, FallBlack, West Indian, and Dominican men are all the same. Literally. They just enact their shenanigans in different regions of the world. We’re just lucky we get to see it all within the boroughs of NYC.A discussion on the Yankees and Mets domination as well as they comparability to the rest of the league. We go over the league in general as well as discuss possible player scenarios that might make Evan throw up.The BBL’s are still going very strong. While we love to see it, we have to wonder if they...2022-07-141h 05Empty The TankDifferent Vibrations Gabe Kapler is yoked, Siddeeq’s iPhone 8 is in need of a major upgrade, and Evan speaks on what type of people want listening to this podcast. Opening thoughts.Stay off of TikTok. The Chinese government is watching.French government trying to ban burkinis. They’ve already banned full face coverings for muslim women. The ignorance is unbelievable.We dive right in to college baseball and give our predictions on the final and the winner. In case you’re unaware, we were both wrong. Congrats to Ole Miss on their first national championship.W...2022-06-2854 minEmpty The TankMeek Mill is Bad at Everything and The President Doesn't Really MatterWelcome Back Boys, Girls and Theys. We're back in your ears, Siddeeq has birthed many children (allegedly) and he loves Nicki Minaj. We lead off with one of our favorite pastimes, watching cringey Meek Mill videos. He really must of been a top tier drug dealer, because everything else looks difficult for him. Evan confesses that he ate expired ketchup, NASTY work, just like Stop & Shop's pricing.Stop and Shop leads us to reflect on inflation and the fact that we're definitely in a recession now, regardless of what they say on TV. But, there...2022-06-231h 03Empty The TankLOCK THE ISLAND DOWN!Get ready for ETT to delve into the scary yet beautiful facts about many animals that could very well eat you while you fight back. We move over many different animals and their many scary features. Evan escapes an altercation with a rhino and Siddeeq gets f***** top by a komodo dragon Just some fun facts that we decided to read off in case you didn’t believe that we went crazy for no reason on this.Fully grown chimpanzees are 8x stronger than a full adult human male.Rhinos have a 5ft vertical...2022-06-131h 01Empty The TankWe (The World) Are Kinda FuckedWelcome Back to Friday Boys and Girls. It's the first Friday of June and the sun is shining. This episode your favorite two voices delve into the state of hitting in baseball today and the stunting of player development by older, non learning coaches. But thats the warm-up. Following that, we delve into conspiracies regarding the ocean, nuclear war, UFOs and fossil origins. Siddeeq is absolutely floored by the fact that the banks, notably HSBC, DGAF about climate change, and New Orleans could be fully underwater by 2050 and be turned into "The New Atlantis". 2022-06-0351 minEmpty The TankAll I Know Is What I See On The Field Evan’s dropping a tape (maybe), those sun tanning mirrors you see in movies gotta be so bad for ya, and Diddy getting called a batty man? These are the things that take up our beginning thoughts on this episode.NYC bearing down (finally) with these speed cameras. You hated em when they first came out, then you realize 90mph down a one way ain’t it. Cameras on 24/7 with multiple dense traffic locations being added.Siddeeq also gives us a very nice turning tip.Herschel Walker for U.S. Senate. I highly reco...2022-05-3054 minEmpty The TankNYC Heats Up while Elon Goes Full VillainHappy Memorial Day Weekend Friday Boys and Girls.We're here like an annoying pimple on prom day and ready to send you off into the 3 day weekend amidst an old fashioned NYC heat wave.This send off begins with your weekly reminder that Amber Heard is a bad person and that if you are an aspriring ballplayer, WATCH THE GAME. We then debate Jazz Chisolm and Hunter Greene's respective gloves before delving into:Mike Freeman's 10 Worst Fan Bases,The Eagles' Jail under the stadium (yes it was real) and Siddeeq's lack...2022-05-2753 minEmpty The TankInvincible We start our roll today by the continuing education of the game of basketball. Specifically in the NBA. Evan sets us off by educating Siddeeq on the specific greatness of Shaq. For him to be averaging over 20ppg is absolutely ridiculous. We then drift off into the dynamic of the game changing due to the 3 point line being introduced in 1979.We then find ourselves speaking on the recent RICO charge that Young Thug, Gunna, and the entire YSL label are dealing with currently. We do our best to explain the situation in general and in its specificity...2022-05-161h 13Empty The TankBIG, Women's POD Evan decides to be Pop Smoke (RIP) for the first couple minutes of today’s episode.Once we get past that it’s a relatively smooth ride into a “sexcapade” that took place in a waterfront property by the wonderful agents of Brown Harris Stevens. Guess nobody mentioned they had cameras in the master bedroom. Bright side; you can add surveillance system to the listing.Abortion. We have no clue why this is on the docket. It real annoying that we keep having to have this conversation. Overturning Roe v. Wade is absolutely ridiculous. This will be...2022-05-091h 10Empty The TankZucky Got Lucky Siddeeq opens this episode with speaking on his experience of DJ’ing and vibing out at a gay bar this weekend. Quality drinks, quality people, and the hookitz, of course. While this is only his second experience he encourages you all to follow in his lead and enjoy something new.We always find ourselves speaking on the Yankee fans and their absurdity about various games, trades, and wins/losses. We’re not even in May yet people. Chill. We rattle off absurd tweets that, in our opinion, will not age well or are just plain ludacris.Ev...2022-04-2957 minEmpty The TankMalfeasancesMonday again, sheesh. We here tho, and words are hard to pronounce. Trevor Bauer may be exonerated but not in the eyes of his peers. A Texas pitcher "speared" a batter whom hit a home run off of him and reminded him rudely. Siddeeq got the hiccups. We're addicted to being busy. Being still is the goal. High school was/is a zoo. Life is brazy, people are just adapting to it as best they can. BoneAppleTea. 2022-04-2554 minEmpty The TankNot Knowing Shit About Shit Our opening nonsense begins with Juan Soto’s greatness, our potential trips throughout the rest of the year, and the ocks selling weed now.The Yankees are a hot topic this episode as Siddeeq has certain qualms about certain players. As a Yankee fan it’s normal to be frustrated with the slightest inconvenience but he believes some of his points are warranted. With the help of Evan, they tackle the many issues with facts and profanity.Lebanon’ Central Bank is bankrupt. Allegedly, according to the Prime Minister. On the other side, the Governor of the Ce...2022-04-221h 07Empty The TankThe BBL Tracker and a Ray of Hope for the Short KingsCongratulations on making it back to Monday. ETT is here as usual to soothe your soul and fill your eardrums.Siddeeq speaks on his observance of Ramadan while Evan reflects on how annoying Siddeeq becomes when he abstains from his vices.Siddeeq then coins a new name for Margaritas, "Marg-A-Largs" and then we debate whether there are more CDLs or more BBLs in the 4 boroughs. We also learn of a "Limb-Lengthening" surgery, that can add up to 5 inches (of height). Short Kings everywhere rejoice!From there we somehow get to Adam Schefter and...2022-04-1851 minEmpty The TankLess Pressure, More Focus Hideki Matsui, Assisted Squat Racks, and Evan’s allergies. Please be prepared for loud, obnoxious sneezes.The title is indicative of our first topic of conversation which has Deeq explain how fired up he gets when someone gives him 110% effort, regardless of the result. Evan chimes in on Siddeeq’s point of educators having a special role in society.BASEBALL’S BACK and we couldn’t be more excited. We spiral into what we, individually, are excited to see for this season. Players coming off the IL, insanely talented rookies, and teams that have made power mo...2022-04-151h 03Empty The TankVicious Air Thrusting Dangerously horny entities take up the beginning of this ETT ensemble. Deshaun Watson and Khamayah’s hit single “1-800-Im-Horny” to be specific. Someone tell us how that song was put into production and how Deshaun finessed his way into a $230mil contract (ALL GUARANTEED).Evan introduces Siddeeq to Babytron music videos. Not much to it. Detroit sits at the top of the drill game right now but these music videos gotta involve a heavier feminine presence. Filming in an Airbnb with guns and a whole lotta dudes only goes so far.Athletics have always had cl...2022-03-2857 minEmpty The TankGet Ya Mother Slapped How long should foreplay last? Evans opens up this ensemble with this question. Depending on the horniness, Siddeeq says, is the answer to that. The nice weather has got us feeling extra nonsensical.Daylights Savings time will never be a thing after 2023 if Mr. Byron decides to sign the Sunshine Protection Act into effect. A natural consequence to this will be an uprising of technology that will eventually take over the world. Eventually we will have to abide by President Biden’s phone to give us the correct time. Will it affect our sleep in a major wa...2022-03-211h 08Empty The TankWest Side N****Wine, mimosas, and plants take up the first quarter of this episode. Specifically, harping on a wine tasting experience being a must, needing an unhealthy (possibly) amount of mimosas, and Siddeeq becoming an interior decorator.1.4 billion pounds of cheese owned by ONE entity. Who? The good-ole US government. A wild thing to write, let alone say out loud. Deeq and Ev go on a rant about food assistance programs started by the surplus of cheese (fucked), comparing cheese and coffee to tea and biscuits, and finally designing our own version of what the facility used to store...2022-03-181h 13Empty The TankSiddeeq Meets YeMonday is back and so are we, just like your toxic ex you backslide with every few months. We get your week started with some fruit talk and Steve Harvey's SHOCKING net worth before delving into Siddeeq's journey through the new Kanye West documentary and Virgil's relationship with Kanye. We also answer the oft-debate question: is Kanye a genius?BoneAppleTea2022-03-141h 00Empty The TankRapper, Trapper Chronicles Haikus, Suliloqys, and the miracle of the major leagues.ETT delves into the massive wealth surrounding Texas University. A PJ for each athletic team while also being a self sustaining athletic program. WE then circle to the inevitable, college kids should be getting paid, if not for them, then at least their families.In light of the ongoing Russia-Ukraine conflict Evan hatches a plan that involves the likes of Thug, and Gunna with an appearance from 21 Savage. Thug’s crooning, and Gunna’s flow could win this war but it’d be more fun to intimi...2022-03-0752 minEmpty The TankEvan Saves AmericaWelcome Back to Friday Mamaos. We're back in your ear canals to guide you to and through the weekend.Siddeeq starts us off hot by curving Selma Hayek for baseball and manifesting his future Business owner desires. We then discuss company morale and the fact that everyone hates the boss, whether thats fair or not is up to you. Eventually that rabbit hole leads us into discussing our first cars, and the fond memories we have of them breaking down at various junctures.And finally, Evan gets into the current state of the US, how...2022-03-041h 03Empty The TankMouth Balancing, Hitler, and the Weather A man balancing many objects on his mouth region. Yes, that statement is accurate. Nevertheless, impressive. The initial nonsense jumps to Siddeeq shortening the word February, and us speaking on the up and down weather.Dinner with 3 people of your choice, dead or alive. Hitler’s got a seat at Jonathan Allen’s table. For sure a hot take but not necessarily wrong.Michael Jackson is that guy. The fainting of women upon his striking a pose on stage is legend status alone.We speak on the Drake hate. Man makes high quality musi...2022-02-2153 minEmpty The TankNew York Men Solidify Their #1 SpotWelcome Back to Monday Boys and Girls and especially, all my NYC kings. Rihanna is pregnant, and has officially solidified us as the best men in the world. It is a glorious day. If you disagree, that's really your problem and keep that negativity to yourself. We watch Kings vs Knicks, a dumpster fire that Evan decides to bet on live during the show. As Evan agonizingly loses money, we discuss Lebron James' new Crypto partnership for his school, the horror of Eminem lyrics, and the NFL playoffs. BoneAppleTeaEminem...2022-02-0751 minEmpty The TankSNOW DAY POD (2022)We start our snow day with talk about one of the greatest, if not the greatest baseball player to ever do it; Barry Bonds. His career numbers/seasonal numbers are video game-like. It brings us to acknowledge some of the other tanks in baseball back then. A-Rod, Sammy Sosa, Mark McGwire.After this pretty well put together intro, we descend into rabbit hole upon rabbit hole. Reg snow day vibes.It pretty much goes Asian contractor vans, college basketball draftees, Fahrenheit 451 and George Orwells 1984 (I mistake this for Edgar Allen Poes’ “The Crow”), reading books that i...2022-02-041h 10Empty The TankAuthenticity, Adventures, and Lambons We speak on Evan’s toxicity and then trail into Brittney Renner’s authenticity and the ramifications that come with that.We also needle these male dominant podcasts to stop bashing women, specifically women of color, cause you’re getting all of us LAMBASTED on Twitter and in general. Understand what your platform can do when you say things of the positive or negative variety.We recap on the fantastic weekend of football we had and revel on having another one. Joe Burrow is the real deal, Pat Mahomes and Josh Allen are absolute gunslingers, Staffo...2022-01-281h 19Empty The TankRobot Assassins and Critical Race TheoryHappy Monday famborghinis. ETT back in ya ears like we left our to-go plate in your mother's kitchen.We only discuss important things on Mondays, such as portable shitters, George Costanza laying down the pipe and Siddeeq's hate of kittens and sex. Then we throw in some Chris Paul slander for taste.Ultimately we end up debating the 4 day work week, the realness of the latest Boston Dyanmics killer robot (they should stop, this is iRobot type shit) and the new bill in Florida that closely resembles the Critical Race Theory Bill passed in Texas.2022-01-241h 11Empty The TankHOTEP ETT Siddeeq gets exposed to Hotep Jesus and forces Evan to watch a portion from his time on the Joe Rogan podcast. This specific portion of the podcast references the first slaves that were brought over; or rather not brought over. We discuss Siddeeq’s naivety to this portion of black history as well delve into life back then. Horniness and all. Side note.. porn is so bad for you.These kids are young and dumb and deserve to be told they are young and very dumb. Gateway to more disrespectful behavior is calling you by your first na...2022-01-211h 02Empty The TankWhat Era of Music Are We In?Welcome Back to Monday and Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day Boys and Girls. We spend this episode bouncing around like your little nephew after too much candy. From Kevin Porter Jr. to Muslims and Elon Musk in China to the Cars of Puerto Rican men. But most importantly, we try to figure out what era of music we're in. Are all the legends gone? How did our parents get Michael Jackson and Prince, at the SAME time?We try to figure this out and then we try to teach Siddeeq golf. Spoiler - didn't...2022-01-1752 minEmpty The TankPut the Toilet Seat Down Ev starts to sing and all of a sudden we’re talking about the difference between LP’s and EP’s then we end up diving into the late Pop Smoke and Welcome To The Party. Side note… these songs sound better in Dyckman. Our parents really got it done. In more ways than one.. But we’re learning now some of the habits created by them are not necessarily a good thing. Siddeeq gotta stop touching toilet seats. NFL Playoff Picture. Send your bets in now. ***WE deeply apologize for some of the audio...2022-01-141h 04Empty The TankETT Christmas Spectacular'Tis the season, we're back in the festive spirit (kind of) with some nonsense and some holiday cheer. Such as... wrapping paper vibes, Queens drill rap x Christmas, Virgil's 3% rule, Harry Belafonte, COVID ruining the Holiday Spirit and the Omarion Virant going crazy.Then we rant on proper gift giving etiquette (don't overthink it), our need for secretaries and Siddeeq's hate of Etch-a-sketches. RIP Gregory IsaacsMerry Christmas Boys and Girls. All I Want For Christmas Remix - Ewan Carter2021-12-231h 06Empty The TankThe Miseducation of ETTFriday. 7 Days until Christmas Eve. ETT in ya ears. What more can you ask for?We start off insulting the management team of a small business before delving into the minutia of the bible and other religious texts. That's about the first 15 minutes. Siddeeq somehow knows the heights of Adam and Eve (how the fuck) and Evan tries to get Adam an NBA career. From there, we debate whether you're more educated with a college degree and then laugh (and cringe) at the Robert Sarver (owner of the Phoenix Suns) allegations. BoneAppleTea2021-12-1758 minEmpty The TankThe Myth of Applying PressureHappy Friday Boys, Girls and Pets. We've missed you and we know your ear drums have been yearning for us. We start off with the basics, meaning we illuminate Siddeeq's worst enemy (his self) before getting into the over-connected world that we live in. This over-connectedness has revealed to us that people like to unwind by pretending to be dogs, kennel, dog collar and all. Wild. We then explore the myth of "applying pressure" and how what women want on social media differs from what actually happens in the bar/club on the weekend. Finally...2021-12-101h 01Empty The TankIt'll Happen Again ETT entering your ear canal on a Monday is nothing new. This Monday is no exception. We’re back with the nonsense that includes a progression from the intrigue the name Davonte brings Evan, to then speaking on an old western film with a character named Cadillac Jack, then moving into how drippy people got on the dirt roads back before it was paved, and finally ending it off with a gentle reminder to let your manhood breath a lil bit. Big shouts to the XYXX pod on their first event. We appreciate you for th...2021-12-061h 13Empty The TankWinter is Coming and Manhattan Is Still On TopWelcome Back to Reality - and the official start of Winter. We begin with recapping our most extreme cold moments, including one that led Siddeeq to consider ending it all mid-work day. We then ask an important question: What if the Knicks were good?We then close out the borough series with our top pick. Manhattan. It's the default greatest borough: From partying, overall quality/diversity of life to the homeless situation to the variety of fine foods and people.NYC is the epicenter of the world. If you disagree or don't like...2021-11-291h 08Empty The Tank#BigQueens By the title of this episode you know what the f*** going on. As we delve into seemingly only good things about Queens, the boys find it hard to garner anything negative about the historic borough. As we ramble on about #2 on their list we fall into tangents that include a plethora of nonsense. In the end, they end up not finding anything at all. Evan, maybe protecting his reptuation as being a Queens ambassador (self-appointed), declines to mention the ONE bad thing he had on his list for his borough. Oh well. Song: I'm Bad by...2021-11-221h 04Empty The TankEvan "Survives" Astroworld While Siddeeq Drinks His Face OffWelcome Back to Friday Mamaos, it's been a week since our last sojourn into your ears. But we're back, refreshed and tanks full (pause). The backdrop of this episode is the Patriots evisceration of the Falcons, and Evan's bold proclamation that "The Falcons Stink". Bold Take kid. We then reflect on what we've done with our time off in the South. Siddeeq decided to test his liver's resolve and drink his way through an entire wedding and weekend. Evan decided to visit the heartland of America and go to the most deadly concert in the last 50 or so years...2021-11-191h 06Empty The TankNo Sleep 'Til BrooklynWelcome to Friday ETT Nation! The Borough Series continues, as we get to #3, Kings County - Brooklyn. Before assessing the borough of Brooklyn, we get serious and talk about our plan to eradicate racism - Grandma Enforcers. Then we slide into Brooklyn like some K Y .... nevermind. Anyway, like Belt Parkway traffic we get stuck on traffic and parking in Brooklyn. Summary: not fun. Siddeeq even recounts a personal story of Brooklyn vehicular disrespect. We then go through the geography and neighborhoods of Brooklyn as well as the shocking...2021-11-1253 minEmpty The TankThe Boogie Down The beginning of our pods have recently began with a plethora of random thoughts that come to the forefront of our minds or whatever happens to be going in those moments as we grace the microphone with our voices. This one is no exception. A quick wrap up of this episodes nonsense/beginning thoughts includes Siddeeq forgetting his chap stick, a $1 steak from dollar tree, Aaron Rodgers and his team full of brothers, Freddie Freeman’s upcoming free agent market, and us predicting the wrong outcome of the Braves vs. Houston series. Go Braves!We co...2021-11-081h 02Empty The TankThe 100 Club: Our Greatest Hits Episode #100, Cien, 1 DOUBLE O. Hard to believe that we've come this far, and yet, here we are back in your ear canal. "Most podcasts only make it to like 10 episodes and give up because they not famous yet so good shit keep going" - Desus to a "slightly" inebriated Evan at an undisclosed bar in Brooklyn.We run through this episode in typical ETT fashion, namely, Batman slander with some sports sprinkled in. Then we reminisce on the incredible interviews we've done, and the absurdness of the topics we've covered and tangents we've...2021-11-051h 06Empty The TankThe New Borough After Evan tells me my 76yo grandmother needs to be more self sufficient we dive into the fact that Americans eat in large quantities while the rest of the world deals with quality of the food they eat. What do you think the pinnacle of American food is? We then move over into the ghettoness of having to tell your employer you need time of to send time with your kid. Little tangents such as an umpire wearing j’s, a guy looking like Voldemort, and Siddeeq fixing his microphone we venture into the ranking of the boroughs. We ta...2021-11-011h 06Empty The Tank2021, The Most Abundant of TimesWelcome Back to Friday mamaos, it is 48 hours until Halloween. We sincerely hope you drink your face off Saturday night (safely) and bring in November with a slight hangover and blurred memories. In between bites of that hangover bagel, press play - as we started with Siddeeq criticizing Evan's nutrition with no facts only vibes. Then Siddeeq champions West Indian people as the world's best alcoholics - and we're not sure if best is the right word. Then we lament about the state of NYC commuting and the fact that, although things seem terrible at all times on social...2021-10-2950 minEmpty The Tank“Strive for Perfection so your Mistakes are better” We start off this episode by indulging Evan in his delusion of Young Thug using his ad libs. Goes on for longer than expected so please bear with us. Our path then ventures into Khabib Nurmagedov being a trained assassin essentially, one equipped to bite your heart. Our mental subconscious believes us when we put ourselves down with the negative thoughts/words/actions. WE as a collective need to do a better job of putting out positive thoughts to trick our subconscious into positivity being our default setting. Furthermore, a new asset class (crypto) is the future. We’ve be...2021-10-251h 22Empty The TankYeah, I'd Make Love to a Baseball Friday you son of a bitch, you were dearly missed. ETT is back bringing you Purposeful Nonsense. But first, we talk baseball. Dodgers v. Giants was the series of the year, and the Rays Front Office is Thanos. We also reminisce on Ty Cobb, who was not only a Hall of Fame ballplayer but also a Hall of Fame racist, truly a multi talented guy. Then we delve into the Yankees offseason, and their potentially dire situation.Evan then begins day drinking and laments on being at his breaking point trying to bring his little...2021-10-221h 29Empty The TankIs the United States Really the Land of the Free?ETT would like to welcome you back to another Friday. Whether your week was good, bad or meh, ETT is here to get you to the weekend. We lead off debating about Kevin Samuel's consulting style and Evan verbally sketches out his new app idea, "FuckFax". From there, we touch on Zuckerberg and Facebook's monopoly on social media and therefore the culture. Hopefully he decides to take mercy on the world. Somehow we get to the difference in education of nurses vs. doctors and the rampant spread of vaccine mis-information. And eventually, we get to the United States and...2021-10-1550 minEmpty The TankI Rap and I Trap Siddeeq finally gets in tune with rap beef from the past between 50Cent and Jadakiss.Donald J. Trump is the 50Cent of politics.We go down JLo’s roster, realize she for the streets, and talk about how bad the love don’t cost a thing video is.Love don’t cost a thing challenge??Navigating regret in our lives.Songs: I Run New York by 50Cent ft Tony Yayo / Problem Child by Jadakiss2021-10-111h 01Empty The TankHomeless People Have Social Lives TooIt's Friday, so that means we're back in ya ear like some airpods. Slow Clap for the Yankees going on a hot streak in the 2nd half to ultimately lose with their $36 Million Dollar Man shitting the bed during the most watched Baseball Game in 23 years. Pain. Anyway, we record this episode without regard for Siddeeq's agony and make sure to focus only on the important things.Such as... the social lives of the homeless and Andrew Wiggins folding like a house of cards once he realized he wasn't getting all his funds if he wasn't vaxxed...2021-10-081h 17Empty The TankI Wanna Live In America!We dive head first into NY's mandate for all healthcare workers to be vaccinated, followed up with Babe Ruth's success playing in today's baseball world, while finishing up with the lunacy of the US prison system. We compliment our topics this week with a healthy dose of the ETT nonsense, specifically Evan's despair as we watched the Eagles get clobbered by the Cowboys.EVAN BROWN FOR QB1 @PHILADELPHIAEAGLESSong; Company by 24kgoldn ft. Future2021-10-0456 minEmpty The TankYou Going to Jail Now! R Kelly EditionWelcome Back to Friday boys and girls. In the words of our brother and former/future guest, Chec, it's a great day to have a great day!We lead off with the realization that West Indian People are hard on the mental of those that don't understand us. Kanye Shrug - we're working on it. We then stumble into watching the Dominican Republic's Z team and our Dominican alter-egos are born: Evan Costello and Syd Rodriguez. Que lo que. And finally, we talk about Robert Sylvester Kelly's crimes against humanity, and the enabling that surrounded him. 2021-10-011h 00Empty The TankThe Seduction of a Pregnant WomanAnd just like that, Friday is back, and so is ETT.We're in rare form. The title should have made that clear. Lana Rhoades, Evan meant every word. Post seduction, we get back to Donda and CLB, and our reflections after the hype. Then somehow end up discussing Tesla Bots and the reality that our lives will soon be some version of iRobot. And the other reality that every baseball game seems to have a quota for Erectile Dysfunction commercials. Figure it out MLB.Bone Apple Tea2021-09-241h 10Empty The TankSiddeeq's New Life and Nicki Minaj's Cousin's Friend's BallsHappy Friday Boys and Girls! We're back in your ear canals as we watch the Mets dumpster fire of a season further ignite. Siddeeq has a new job, dispositon and outlook on life - which is immediately shattered when he finds out quavo and saweetie are back together. As he tears up in the studio. Evan falls in love with a newswoman, and we analyze the Met Gala fits, Nicki Minaj's vaccine stance, her anger towards Chuck E Cheese, and the world changing utility of the iPhone. Please don't do crack guys. Bone...2021-09-1753 minEmpty The TankTake Ya Hands Off Ya Private Parts and Keep Em To Yourself We end up speaking on racism. More specifically speaking on the evidence showing the horrific findings of hemp luring white women into the arms of black men. Spoiler alert.. there is no evidence.Dr. Umar won’t allow his child to attend a white school. Would you?Football is back baby! We breakdown the dumpster fire that is the NFC East.Frosted Flakes = Horniness. Siddeeq is apparently “on go” after a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch.Song: Stayin' Alive by Bee Gees 2021-09-0755 minEmpty The TankHeat Seeking Fastballs and the Economic State of China vs. the United StatesHappy Monday and Welcome Back to ETT. While you sit in traffic, we galavant our thoughts and remark on:The White Sox being good at baseball, Heat Seeking Fastballs, and we make our World Series Picks, shout out Tim Anderson. Then Evan begins a monologue about the global economy - and how China is arguably in better economic shape. We then lose focus and talk about bears, assets, NFTs and the lovable dumpster fire that is the NFC East. Go Birds. Bone Apple TeaGrand Nash - Larry June2021-08-161h 16Empty The TankCookie Time This episode brings Evan and Siddeeq back to highschool; more specifcally to revel in the disparities between the NY high school experience compared to Florida's. We also come to learn that barstool has an immense hold on the baseball podcast game. Who knew. Furthermore, we dive into the likes of Aubrey Huff being a shit sack, MLB pitcher Trevor Bauer more than likely going to jail, and how we'd take advice from our future selves.Song: Location by Dave ft Burna Boy2021-08-131h 18Empty The TankHarry Potter vs. The '96 BullsGood morning and Happy Monday! Ya boys are back and we with our usual charm we discuss:The State of North KoreaThe Geography of Denver and Evan's (incomplete) Review of the Stateand answer this important question: Could Harry Potter hoop? As Always, Bone Apple Tea.Rob Stone - Chill Bill2021-08-091h 06Empty The TankETT MLB Trade Deadline SpectacularEvan leads us on a journey to nowhere with his opening monologue, and then we get into the trade deadline. Excuse Siddeeq's allergies. Dodgers are Thanos. Mets were thrifty. Yankees went lefty. Most All-Stars ever traded at the deadline. Cubs had an Everything Must Go Sale. And we marvel at AWD Camry's. We got it all. If you do not like baseball, this may be tough to listen to, but if you like us, it'll be entertaining. And if you don't, why the fuck are you reading this caption? Resepctfully.Bone Apple Tea.Dream Girl...2021-08-021h 12Empty The TankReality Testing Disgusting men, stupid anti-vaxxers, and you're a loser if you celebrate other peoples losses. Beyond all this jibber-jabber we speak heavily on ego. Siddeeq looks inward while him and Evan explore the ego; consciously and subconsciously. Check out the bio for the book that leads the conversation.A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose by Eckhart TolleSong: Nonstop by Drake2021-07-301h 18Empty The TankComing to America: The Evan Brown Edition People who are angry because they’re having kids are the worst.What’s with the United States hate man? No matter the culture before, the future is meant for change; if we’re up to the task. Its always fuck the racists btw.Facebook is the political bible(s) for old people.Derek Jeter. Beloved Yankee with a very respectable roster. Let’s all envy Derek over his numerous bombshells over the years.Song: The Way I Are by Timbaland ft. Keri Hilson, D.O.E., Sebastian2021-07-2355 minEmpty The TankWhats the Price of your Soul?E T T, back in your ears like we left our car keys. We speak on the following in no particular order:Da Babythe sugar daddy/simping erathe barstool sports aesthetic - hire us Davey BoyMens league celebrations to go viraland then...we get into more serious things, such as hanging our beliefs on God's Hat Hanger, not compromising your beliefs for clout/attention and having a personal code.Evan also rants (and worries) about cool people, he is how the...2021-07-201h 08Empty The TankGlobal Warming is TerrifyingOur NICEst episode yet... We got a quickie for ya on this Monday morning.Siddeeq returns from holiday and Evan returns from a long weekend of sleep to riff on the following:These kids not being accountableCosta RicaEmployees spitting on the floor at LGAHolding the door for women (do it coward)And global warming going OH so crazy.Bone Apple Tea.Kelly Price - Migos2021-07-1236 minEmpty The TankHater Camouflage We relish in Lionel Messi’s contract with Barcelona. Just in time to watch him take on Brazil with his hometown team in the Copaamerica final. Who ya got??Saweetie is fire. Without question. Her diet though.. needs some cleaning up.Military uniforms have a certain level of toughness to them. The dress blues are a personal favorite of Siddeeq’s.Two very different detention experiences for Evan and Siddeeq in high school. Let’s just say Siddeeq tried really hard not to get in trouble while Evan welcomed discipline....2021-07-091h 14Empty The TankThere is a New Toxic King! (Congrats Canada)Back Again on a Friday AM to massage your ear drums into a 3 day July 4th Weekend.WARNING: Evan does sing a fair amount in this episode.We crown the New Toxic King after which we ponder the logical absurdity of marriage.Then we get into our respective Juneteenth weekends, what it means, why celebrate regardless of reparations and a brief history of redlining, blockbusting and its racist history and how it affected even superstar athletes like Willie Mays.Along the way we inevitably circle back to MLB, the sticky substance...2021-07-021h 03Empty The TankSiddeeq Ali: Glass Case of EmotionWe are E Doble Pecho and we are Coming in HOT on a Friday.We hope you enjoyed your week, and if you didn't we're here to make it better, or slightly worse - depending on how you feel about BLM, time travel and the prices of lumber and steel.2021-06-251h 06Empty The TankThere's an Elevator... IN THE YACHTWe settle in around the campfire, put on the Red Sox Astros game and reflect on how amazing the game of baseball is right now. Fernando Tatis is a wrecking ball with dreads and a chain and we'd have it no other way. How long would it take to teach a non baseball person to hit a 80 mph+ ball? The reality of celebrity spending and Evan lobbies to be Future's accountant.And then.. we go yacht shopping and discuss aquatic rub and tugsOh and Bezos is not the world's daddy. 2021-06-0853 minEmpty The TankStupid Shit (x3) Siddeeq’s journey into rap music. From undecipherable to Westside Gunn. Coming to the U.S. by boat/walking through water? Yeah. We’re not built for it. REGARDLESS of who put those kids in cages; something needs to be done. 1 Step formula to probably not becoming a parent! Wear a condom jackass. Knicks fans wants the Nets… delusional or confident?Song: Puss Between Your Legs by Juicy J 2021-06-041h 00Empty The TankWhat If She Drops to Her Knees... To PROPOSEHappy Memorial Day!The weather may have stopped outside but it can't stop us.We start you off with our usual charming banter, with everything from Putin to obscure sports team logos to Kyrie's unlimited PTO. Then we get into Marriage.(32:00) Evan paints a scenario for Siddeeq, in which he is proposed to in the Bronx and peer pressure is abound and extortion a possibility.(56:00) What if your spouse has a different religion, what religion are the kids? Should they have the same religion for the sake of uniformity?2021-05-311h 16Empty The TankNipples of Steel Our parents hit us. Hard. We’re gonna hit our kids. Just not that hard. Yankees turn a triple play LIVE. Excuse my vulgarity.Summer gonna get whatever body you give it.. Just call yourself lazy.Quality of nudes has evolved. Comedic strip clubs? Evan recounts head coach experiences from the past weekend. Song: Million Dollar Mansion by Lil Keed ft. Young Thug 2021-05-241h 04Empty The TankETT Goes to Therapy - Oh and There are AliensWelcome Back Knuckleheads. We lead off with calling people within baseball names because of their ridiculous upholding of "the unwritten rules". Then, Siddeeq anoints himself the under 6 foot spokesperson, for better or worse. Afterwards we discuss therapy, its utility and alternative everyday methods that can be therapy. After we delve into therapy and its many forms, we focus on the most pressing news item of the year - There are many UFO sightings (apparently for the last few DECADES) and we don't know what the fuck we can do. But we are scared shitless and not afraid...2021-05-211h 07Empty The TankWhy Did You Put The Gas In The Bag??Episode Notes:Hats. Fitted. Quick discussion on subject in regards to type and color scheme. Rob is unwilling to budge on gray brims.High School romance/love/lust made us shamelessWe share the V-card stories. Enjoy that.Instead of a gas can, use a garbage bag.Stories influenced by the lack of discipline and respect, from kids to their parental figures. Baseball edition.Voting rights given to states with low education levels.A look into the realm of our personal barbering experiences. Siddeeq cheated.2021-05-171h 00Empty The TankThe Official ETT Foreign Policy: Free PalestineWelcome to Friday boys, girls and pets that are hearing this through the speakers of their owners.We lead off with exotic children's names, before going down a rabbit hole of baseball analytics and the silliness of older men with money that own baseball franchises.After that 15 minute burst of energy and passion for baseball, we get serious and touch on the current situation in Palestine and Jerusalem. #FreePalestineWhich leads us to wonder if North Korea could actually nuke us. (They can't, we think)Then we decide to...2021-05-141h 31Empty The TankHe Looks Like He Throws KnivesWelcome back and welcome to Friday AM.We assuage you with our voices while we watch a baseball brawl live and start with discussing pre-work dread and the relationship between Dominicans and Haitians. Then we end up debating when and how to yell at teenagers, and whether the president has an actual impact on the economy - stimmy's aside. Finally we end up discussing the NFL draft, why its dope, and how Rob Manfred can fix the MLB draft. All said, we talked about everything, and Siddeeq learned who D'Angelo is. Everybody wins. Unless you argue against...2021-05-071h 57Empty The TankFUCK ALLERGY SEASON, RIP DMXREST IN PEACE DMXIN HIS HONOR, THIS POD DESCRIPTION WILL BE IN ALL CAPS.IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER, WE DELVE INTO THE FOLLOWING:-GYM PLAYLISTS-LACK OF MUSICAL RESPECT FROM YOUNGINS-SIDDEEQS OVERUSE OF THE WORD "CULTURE"-EVAN BEING PART OF #VAXXBOYZ -EVAN'S TRIP TO THE DIRTY SOUTH AND THE AMOUNT OF SHIT IN DALLAS-SHOULD YOU PUT DOWN YOUR OWN CHILD IF THEY'RE A BAD SEED?-DORM ROOM FINESSINGTHERE'S MORE BUT THE...2021-04-1948 minEmpty The TankWeaponized Pastry PlattersWe are ABOVE the influence. We believe jobs should operate on a rotational basis, i.e. let people treat work like charcuterie boards, you get to find the right cheese and meat for your palette.Also, Neighbors Beware, Siddeeq is dating a Mob Boss' ex-lover, and he has put grenades in the muffins. Evan prefers a more subtle approach, a "gun pie". No sexual context.And then we discuss Francisco Lindor and his contract that will ensure generational wealth for himself and Mets fans. As well as budget loopholes in professional...2021-04-131h 02Empty The TankI Heard N***** Mumbling!An instagram story of constant drinking is socially perceived very differently than an instagram story of constant smoking. A sad fact. We float onto the Drake topic again. He hasn't missed.. or has he? Tru Religion jean jackets bring Evan back into a simpler time while Siddeeq wonders why their threading is so obscene. Movie theaters opening back up provide a lot of you, and us, with a chance at some risky movie theater shenanigans lol. Siddeeq also forgets to plug in his mic for the first couple thoughts so enjoy...2021-03-221h 13Empty The TankETT vs. ScienceEvan starts us off with a declaration about WandaVision, and then we descend into the usual cascade of our conversations. There's no real elegant way to describe us following each rabbit hole, so here's a list of what we discussed:First generation immigrantsThe Avengers and their UtilityCGISpiderman (He's From Queens)First Outdoor (Indoor) Outing Batman being a total cornball (an oldie but goodie)The terrorism of superheroesArtificial Intelligence Flaming UsAnd our relationship with Science......2021-03-1952 minEmpty The Tank30-Rack Of Natties Baby!We watched one of many black college baseball players absolutely demolish a home run on a stupid pitch callSiddeeq only drank reds apple ale his first smesmester of college What is a high value woman to us? What does she bring to society?Putin is a dangerous man Curiosity isn’t something everyone else has. Evan doesn’t get it Could you see yourself picking up and spending a year or two in Latin America? Siddeeq has a hard time grasping the concept of march madness 2021-03-151h 16Empty The TankTexas is Open and Old Men Are Hornier Than Ever: The World is HealingWe were going to write something clever/funny/moronic to summarize what we talked about and why we talked about it, But even we don't fucking know. The following topics were discussed in this episode:The work ethic of Dominican teenagers.The Re-Opening of TexasThe horniness of old men- namely Cuomo, Dick Pick Mic (Mickey Callaway), Jared PorterHow much a kid needs to work to "Make It"Hunter Greene Being an Alien95mph...2021-03-081h 33Empty The TankTru, Tru, Tru, Tru True Say!In this episode, we take a dive into Evan's deep side, courtesy of White Claw, we discuss the pure bliss that baseball brings us, (shoutout the baseball moms who not only take us to games but brave the elements to support us),70 degree weather gonna have us feeling like COVID never existed,$15 minimum wage sounds like a good idea to customers but what about business owners?And the pinnacle of Disney channel movies we were blessed with as kids.P.S. Evan and Rob are having a High School Musical 3 movie...2021-03-0559 minEmpty The TankWe Don't Discriminize - Unless You're Masturbating at WorkWe're back, and so is college baseball.Over some of the finest Chinese food Queens has to offer we discussed:Blink Fitness being the worst, but not worse than their college's old gymBlack Athletes Are Starting to Like Baseball (Again)We May Be AlcoholicsSiddeeq tests the limits of the English languageEvan predicts the disappearance of COVID and loses 30 minutes of audio somehowand finally,Is it kosher to masturbate at work?Bone Apple Tea...2021-03-031h 02Empty The TankFlorida vs. NYCWe're back like we left our car keys in the sofa cushions.Leading off with comparisons of Florida and NYC baseball, we reflect on our experiences and how they made us the men that we are today. For better or worse. Then we talk about our different experiences during conditioning, with Evan explaining his "pacing" himself to beat out the lower rung of runners.Finally we speak on our current professions and how we handle ourselves in an environment where we have to deal with older, grumpier people. We...2021-02-241h 08Empty The TankValentine's Day ReflectionsWe begin by marveling in the magic that is Evan's protein smoothie and then delve into his ideal brunch fit post pandemic. Then, we ask and answer the hard hitting questions that our politicians simply refuse to answer.Such as: Have you earned the right to have sex with the person of your dreams? Is Kevin Samuels a bully or a realist? And how should one handle the truth/rejection?Eventually we get around to The Origins of Valentine's Day and somehow, Henny Ev is...2021-02-1747 minEmpty The TankThe "Buss It" Era We are equally impressed as to how every Buss It Challenge we see has been perfectly executed, Evan is still obsessed with Henny and he would like a sponsorship with them, if any of our listeners have achieved "coffee mug" stability at work, just know we envy you, one of our phones is still not on silent, and for those who don't know.. don't ever disrupt a NY'ers daily schedule. Listen in on Evan's wild scenario to give me perspective on that matter. Song: Anime World ft SahBabii2021-01-291h 21Empty The TankDrugs from Amphibians and Racial PrideSiddeeq leads off with some motivational advice before we argue about the drugs and hallucinogens that interest us. Specifically, DMT/Toad. Somehow that leads us to Wilpon Slander and trade ideas for Francisco Lindor Finally, we get into black vs white pride and then Evan bullies people that are bad at math. Balance. Fuck JeezyGucci - My Kitchen2020-11-271h 11Empty The TankMacaroni in the Potato Salad?!We had company in the form of our friend, Gio. Although not an official guest we appreciate his two cents in the form of potato salad, and the Henny coquito vs the traditional coquito. Evan and I continued to delve into the likes of woman barbers, Siddeeq's prime rolling years, and our holiday predictions.Song - ELI by Fireboy DML2020-11-2157 minEmpty The TankSiddeeq is a Moon CreatureDunkin' gave Siddeeq a sweaty latte... then the pod went off the rails.Enjoy.Save Me - FutureThug Love Story 2012 - Action Bronson2020-11-161h 19Empty The TankEmotional Availability: Maybe You're Just Not The OneWe make our singing debuts while watching the dumpster fire that is NFC East football. (Go Birds) If you pour the milk before the cereal, you may be a killer.A special guest/Media consultant from the Bronx makes an appearance and some NSFW comments.What is emotional availability? Is it a generalized term or are you just not the one? An American Flag is a Get Out of Jail Free Card."Confidence is the Killer of Insecurity" - Siddeeq AliI Want Your Love - Chic2020-11-091h 18Empty The TankThe Formation of the Raccoon Task ForceBroadway - Berner and Larry JuneA new era of Simping has begun and Evan's disdain for raccoons has reached a tipping point. He also MAY have a fractured and/or broken toe. The word vibe has to go. Why do Italian mobsters always have cold cuts around? Also Siddeeq has volunteered to be the team mom for the foreseeable future.2020-10-301h 08Empty The TankThe Beating: MTA Edition. Wines has become an integral part of life. The Rays have always been there; did you notice them? Be a better man then Evan or get snitched on. Why is this pro-life/pro-choice debate so hard? Its none of ya damn business!Song - Car #85 by Nas ft. Charlie Wilson2020-10-231h 15Empty The TankThe Allergy PodEvan's allergies attack him. We record anyway. Lebron wins his 4th ring. We answer a listener request from a close personal friend. We tell you why you're not a pro athlete, and why you should not pretend to be one or ever had the chance. Baseball is absurd. Go Rays.Intro: Float On - The FloatersOutro: The New Smoove - Baby Smoove2020-10-191h 11Empty The TankDon't Apologize, Just Be BetterThrew the kitchen sink at the mic.We shit talk well-off teenagers, discuss intent to murder, and a botched drug deal occurs.Evan wonders if Trump has a bust of his own head for his toupee (believable).Siddeeq continues to try and secure a white claw sponsorship. (high noons>)None of this will benefit you meaningfully.Go Birds.Larry June & Harry Fraud - I Like You2020-10-091h 00Empty The TankAbreu/Newton 2020Jose Abreu is Evan's nominee for President. He would probably pick Cam Newton as his VP.Siddeeq doesn't know what hindsight means somehow???Shoutout @tsmagicleaf. Evan future Forex Founder? Chairman?Who would Gunna be in the MLB?dentists suckWestside Gunn - Bubba Chuck (ft. Stove God Cooks)Danzel - Pump it Up2020-09-2800 minEmpty The TankWhat Are Your Intentions? Ghana rap. Evan's fear of snakes. Home screens on IOS update getting carried away. The nastiness of white socks with dress clothes/shoes. Our mood is always Shia Labeouf. Quarantine gave me back to myself.Song - Tungba by Ajebutter22 and BOJ2020-09-251h 08Empty The TankControl The Controllables, Donald! Evan is lobbying for the revival of paper everything. Cam Newton is back and we support his many fits and his takeover. Control is an illusion. Car rides from hell.Song - Inviolable by Popcaan2020-09-221h 09Empty The TankIt Is (Was) Your BirthdayWe recorded on Siddeeq's birthday. He rambles on his style and metrosexualness. We lose our train of thought several times. But we tried. Enjoy knuckleheads.2020-09-181h 33Empty The TankLabor Day Weekend After a long weekend of drinking, we're back. Siddeeq is 24 now. Ozuna. Doja Cat. Spanish Music. Emotions. Genuine Love. Love Genuinely. Bag Talk. All done while watching the Rockets lose to the Lakers.Ozuna - Del Mar2020-09-1047 minEmpty The TankShe's the reason for the word B****!Do globes keep you distracted? Chadwick Boseman's incredible work ethic. The love for your first car. Evan's rant on the misuse of self care time.SIP Chadwick BosemanSong - Roses by Outkast2020-09-0833 minEmpty The TankSiddeeq Forgot the SauceMets Pain. Yankee fans are belligerent. Police brutality continues. When is the breaking point? Because we don't fucking know. Black Lives Still Matter. West Indian Cuisine. Slightly all over the place as usual. Halle Berry is an eternal gem.Wiz Khalifa, K Camp - Clouds in the Air2020-08-281h 29Empty The TankWe Record on an IslandWe recorded on an island so of course we discussed New Jersey Turnpike service centers, Somalian battlefields and Fighting on the Back Blocks of Brooklyn.RIP KOBE AND GIGIMoney Man - 242020-08-251h 26Empty The TankA Lot Was Said About Many ThingsEvan Pitches a Movie. Siddeeq learns the demographics of Idaho. The following names and phrases were uttered:Dick Cheney. Voting. Ripping Humans in Half. Derrick Henry..James Harrison. Ancient Greece.RIP Michael Clarke DuncanSahBabii - Soulja Slim2020-08-142h 10Empty The TankThe Boys Make Their Big League DebutWe're here. Much like your favorite rapper/singer - we dropped several projects on Soundcloud first before making our way to Apple Music, Spotify and most importantly - your hearts. We talk about our grandmothers, Brooklyn, West Indian Heritage and the worst proposal assist maybe of all time. Also, we speak on our close personal friend Jeff Bezos as well.Maleek Berry - Far Away introduces us to your ear canal.2020-08-121h 13