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Through My Looking GlassThrough My Looking Glassnot depending on anyone for your love and happinessWe have to love ourselves and know that if anyone say they love you, that is a second or third. It should now make or break us. We do not have to say now we are loved because we already love ourselves. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2024-02-2525 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassWhat are some of the positive choices we need to make to heal and stay mentally safe?Some of the things we must remember is,     1. We are somebody 2.    We are important 3.    We are not defined by the negative ways other define us --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2024-01-0950 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking Glasswhy do so many of us define ourself by our past instead of allowing it to refine us.Is the holiday stress we are putting on ourselves worth it? How is it worth it? Most important, will we recover.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2023-12-1426 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassWhat is the one of the most painful things someone told you about yourselfAs we go through live some people get joy in telling other things like, You too black. You are fat. You do not dress right You not good enough. You will never turn out to be anything. No one will ever love someone like you. You are not the right type. You do not know how to do that. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2023-11-2729 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassWays to lessing our painWe all have two things in common. We are born and we die. Somewhere between birth and death we all feel pain. Some of us feel more pain than other. Some of our closest family and friends can cause us more physical and psychological pain than they should. Pain hurts no matter what kind. We need to give ourself some self-love. Giving ourself self-love can help us to see the warning sings. See thing that does not feel right and get us ready to say NO! and step away. We need to find ways to lessing our pain. ...2023-09-1026 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassSome of the reasons why loving yourself is important. Loving yourself is important in everyday life. it makes us heather. We learn to have less expectation of others. What are some of your reasons for loving yourself?. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2023-07-0318 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassWhy is mental health important? The first step to a good mental health is to be honest with ourselves about what we are feeling and what you are looking to change. Every day, we will likely face something that is out of your control. Our well-being shapes how we engage with it and how well we come out on the other side.  Take it day by day and we should always give ourselfsoe self love. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/su...2023-05-2225 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassMake peace with things that is past Weather we are an abuser, a victim, or a survivor, we all need self-love, and we all need support. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2023-05-0118 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassThe Invisible monster According to the CDC, 124 people die from gun violence every day and even more sustain non-fatal injuries. From my experiences it is that invisible monster that exist in all of us. From a young age. If we do not learn to control it, it will control us. The sad thing is this monster are born  when we are at our weakest point.  I believe it exist in all of us --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2023-04-0331 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassTeen DepressionAccording to the CDC: Over 1 in 10 youth in the U.S. are experiencing depression that is severely impairing their ability to function at school or work, at home, with family, or in  their social life. 16.39% of youth (age 12-17) report suffering from at least one major depressive episode (MDE) in the past year. 11.5% of youth (over 2.7 million youth) are experiencing severe major depression. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2023-03-0638 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassSurviving the trauma and stereotyping of our own peopleBlach History Month is a time to take a deeper look into ourselves. what are we and what can we do to make this world a better place for the next generation.  why is it that we treat each other better than other race treats us. we are all one. we need to love each other. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2023-02-0622 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassLightening our mental load by making necessary changes in what we do in life.Self-love should be our most import responsibility.  It is through self love will we see the things around us that is holding us down. Are we doing too much for other and not taking care of ourself.  Is our mental help suffering? --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2023-01-1624 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassHow not having expectations of others helped to avoid confusion, and disappointmentPeople no matter how close you are to them will disappoint you. It is for us to be prepare that it happens. It is part of life, but it should not be. We need to be responsible for ourselves. We are in control of ourselves.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2023-01-0422 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassStaying safe and making positive choices will help us make It through each day. This upcoming holiday. It is one of the most dangerous times of the year for victim and survivors. Over 97,700 died from overdose mostly accidently. Opioids are a factor in 7 out of every 10 or 72% of those overdose deaths. Many commits suicide this time of the year than any other time.  By making positive choices, we will make it through the rest of the holiday and after. We should congratulate ourselves then use the positive we learn to help us through the end of the year. Better days are come. Take deep breath. Count to ten.2022-12-2623 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassIs this upcoming holiday worth the fuss?So lets think, if we have family, mother, father, sister, brother, children, etc.  All they need is to know we love them and will spend time with them. Love and time is worth more than gold. I recall the old days when we would give handmade gifts. Calling a person who is lonely once a week is worth more than trying to fine money to give that person a onetime twenty-dollar gift. This is a time for self-love so we will survive this joyful but dangerous time a year. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.c...2022-12-1925 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassSelf-love surviving the upcoming holidaySurviving the holiday can be a challenge.  we need to figure out what to do  to keep ourself in a positive mode. Lets enjoy the holiday by first give ourselves some self-love.  pay attention to the tings and people that can cause a trigger.  Is it not going to parties? Is it not being around certain people or going to certain places  Is it not eating certain food Do you know what to do when one creeps up on you always money cannot buy love and happiness 2022-12-1229 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassPart 4 self-evaluation, The Work Preference InventoryThis week part four is based on doing a self-evaluation using The Work Preference Inventory. It is taken from the Journal of Personality and Social psychology.  In doing this evaluation I found myself looking at myself in ways I have not before. I am making better choices. I found things I need to work on and things I am very proud of myself about.  Please join me in taking this. You will be surprised. If you have not done part 1-3. Please go back to my last three episode and do it. You will be happy you did it....2022-11-2131 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassPart 3 self-evaluation. Questions taken from the Desirability of control scaleCome join me for in doing part three of a self-evaluation. This week I took thirteen questions from the Desirability of Control scale. It was developed to measure individual differences in the level of motivation to control the event in one life. It is always good to evaluate ourself. In doing this self evaluation we need to think about ourself only.  As victims and survivors we sometime forget how powerful we are. We must always remember we are in control of ourselves. We are the only one that can make decision as to the choices we make. I...2022-11-1425 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassPart 2 of self-evaluation/ Domestic violence awareness month lets raise our voices Doing this self-evaluation has helped me to be more positive about me. I have finding things i need to work on for me and things to let go.  Being a survivor, domestic violence is always something i raise my voice about. October is domestic violence awareness month lets all raise our voices and support.  According to the NNEDV "Domestic violence thrives when we are silent. 1 in 7 women, children and men are affected by domestic violence. It impacts people of all races, ages, sexual orientations, religions, genders, socioeconomic backgrounds, and education levels. Yet over half of dom...2022-10-3126 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassChoices/Fear of Negative Evaluation ScaleAs Victims and survivors, we often think the worst of ourselves. Over the next four weeks, I will ask you to join me in doing a self-Evaluation.  This week I will do the "Fear of Negative Evaluation Scale. (This was taken from the Journal of Consulting Clinical Psychology)  Come join me next week. I will be doing the "Need Assessment Questionnaire"  It contain statements that may describe the type of things we may like to do. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com...2022-10-2421 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassAlcohol Use Disorder (AUD)According to the 2019 NSDUH, 14.5 million (nearly 15 million) people ages 12 and older7 (5.3 percent of this age group8) had AUD. This number includes 9.0 million men7 (6.8 percent of men in this age group8) and 5.5 million women7 (3.9 percent of women in this age group8  Alcohol Use Disorder (AUD) affect millions of people. We have to question how and why it gets to the point where the Alcohol controls us. We have to question When did it start? Why did you start? If you started before age 21, who supplied you with the alcohol?  Where did the al...2022-10-1030 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassNational Suicide Prevention MonthThe National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is now: 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline 988 has been designated as the new three-digit dialing code that will route callers to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. While some areas may be currently able to connect to the Lifeline by dialing 988, this dialing code will be available to everyone across the United States starting on July 16, 2022. LEARN MORE ABOUT THE LIFELINE & 988 --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-09-2629 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassReflectionAs victims and survivors, we want to be safe and healthy. How many times have we said, "if I could do that again I would do it differently". That is reflection.  Lets use our reflection to make better choices. what would you change.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-09-1927 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassFinding the good in othersThere is good in that person that smiles and says hello to you when the last fifty people passed you and look down on you. The person that listens to you when you need to just talk. As victim and survivors, we need all the positivity we can get. All the choices we make no matter how small can make or break us. We also can make positive choices that will change someone's life. Be that person. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com...2022-09-1222 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassOmarie Birth DateWe are all sure of two things. one is birth and the other is death. Whatever comes between we are all in some way leave our mark in life. August 24 was my son Omarie's Birthday. He left his mark. Lots of people took time out to say happy birthday to him. The crazy thing is it was my birthday as well. we have shared a birthday for forty-two years. This would have been forth three. Happy birthday my son. He always gave me flowers in some form or another. This year a good friend of his gave me flowers...2022-08-2918 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassChildren living with a depress parentWhen a child lives with a depressed parent the child can get depressed as well. Children feel what the parent is going through. They feel the energy the parent is putting out. Lets keep these children safe and healthy. Once we get help for ourself we can then help our children.  Remember very young children gets depress as well. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-08-1520 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassThings that make me happyAs Victims we have to be happy for the little things in life. First and most, we have to be happy for waking up this morning. Being alive in this moment this time. For that I am happy. Join me, lets fine the little things to be happy about.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-08-0127 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassBe mindful when you love Love should come naturally but i realize at times we have to be mindful.  Love has different meaning to different people. When it comes to family. It is sad but we have to be mindful of them as well. Your first love should be you.    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-07-2520 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassChildren and marijuanaMarijuana is not for children. When children mistake "edible" marijuana (like gummy bears, brownies, lollipops, etc.) for regular food and eat it unknowingly. Small children are at higher risk based on their size and weight.  Because edible products have very high amounts of marijuana, the symptoms are more severe on a small child. Many young children who consume marijuana edibles require hospital admission due to the severity of their symptoms. IF you have marijuana or edibles in your home, keep it aways from children. use Alock box so children cannot have access to it. Protect your children. --- S...2022-07-1832 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassSelf DisciplineAs victims and survivors, we have to have self-Discipline. Some of the choices we make can make or break us.   Lets set goals so we can become a better us.    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-07-1122 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassWhat does freedom meanBack in slavery our ancestors so much want it to be free. freedom was their main goal. Some learn to free they're mine in order to go through there every day. Today freedom mean a whole lot of different things to a whole lot of people. Yes some of us are still victims. We don't have the freedom that others do. One thing we do have is the power to free our mind. When we allow ourselves only to control our mind, then we can create a source of freedom to make choices. --- Send in a voice message: https...2022-06-2723 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassFathers' DayHappy Father's Day to all the great fathers. so many wonderful fathers do not get to see their children for one reason or another. Most  common is because of child support or because that mother for whatever reason does not want them to. Children needs their positive fathers in their lives. For all you mothers who are keeping the children from their fathers, you are hurting the fathers but you are hurting the children more than you can imagine. Sho some love. think about your child future.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/me...2022-06-2023 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassWhy my children was taken away from meTimes when we lose a loveones, we question why. Today I question why my children ws taken away from. I miss mt children --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-06-1310 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassMissing Omarie AbelI have had the displeasure of saying my final farewell to my son Omarie.  A bitter taste in my mouth, an even bigger hole in my heart. It is not easy for a mother to put her child to rest. For me, this is my third. When will the pain end? how much can one bear. Omarie i know your soul is at rest and you have gotten your wings. For that i will rejoice knowing you will be beside your sister Ebony and your brother baby Smith watching over me.  Omarie you are a great son, brother, father, gr...2022-06-081h 21Through My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassConsequencesChildren are sometimes taught to say sorry when they hurt someone. The problem ls, if there is no consequences behind their action, they will go up and continue hurting other feeling saying sorry is all they need to do. We need to learn that out negative  actions can affect not just the person they hurt but the ones closes to them. Lets be positive to others. caring does not cause anything. My son Omarie was a caring son, father, brother , uncle, cousin and grandson.  I miss and love him. We can learn a lot from him. He had a go...2022-05-3018 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassLosing a child a great fatherAnother one of my children passed away this week. Right now I am lost, broken, I am not sure how i am process it. My son Omarie as left a positive on many. My message this week is to love your love one. Love the people around you. Do not wait until they are gone for you to say i wish I said I love him or her. Love does not cause anything. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-05-2324 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassHappy Mother DayThe one thing no one can take from us is the gift of giving birth. That is a feeling like no other. Lets celebrate  the joy of being a mother. Join me in celebrating all the mothers. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-05-0921 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassBe mindfulNov. 18, 2021 -- The CDC reported that an estimated 100,306 Americans died from drug overdoses during the period of April 2020 to April 2021, a 28.5% increase from the previous year. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-05-0216 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassGiving thanks for the little thingsAs Victims and survivors, we are lucky. We have a lot to give thankful for. Give thanks for getting up every time we go to sleep. Lets give thanks for the little things in life. Lets help other.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-04-2523 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassSteps we have to take to accomplish /What is your goal 2So you have a goal. What steps are you taking to accomplish that goal. If you are a victim, your goal might be to become clean or get out of that  abusive relationship you are in. How do you do that. We are strong lets go for it. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-04-1721 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassWhat is your goal (part 1?)As victims and survivors there are a lot, we have to accomplish. In doing all that we have certain goals we want to achieve. What are those goals and what do you need to do in order to achieve those goals? --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-04-1114 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassWho are you connected to?This is a people needing people world. We all need to be connected to someone. As victims and survives we know at some point in our life, we need someone. The wonderful thing is we are also needed by others. We can support and be a positive connection to others --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-04-0427 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassMisconceptions of Dating ViolenceWe all try to seek out that special person to spend some quality time with. Why is it so wrong to expect to have a good time without it being negative or be violent? There is so much misconception on reason and ideas of why.    --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-03-2818 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassAccepting who we areAt times we allow others to influence the way we see ourselves. We allow others to shrink us down to where we fall from the positive path we are traveling. Lets keep our eyes on the prize which is us. We can be who and what we want to be. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-03-2125 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking Glassinstant gratificationinstant gratification is something that most of us look for every day. At time we even feel we should not have to work for it. WE need to discipline our body and mind to work at what we need to in time we will achieve our goal  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-03-1429 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking Glasssex traffickingSex trafficking is on the rise.  Lets look at Who is most vulnerable and who are the traffickers. Lets help the victims and put an end to the traffickers.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-03-0733 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassIf you are experiencing domestic violence, support is out thereOne thing I have learned is everyone needs support. If you are a victim support is out here. Domestic violence is on the rise every day. If you are experiencing domestic violence which can also include sexual assault, support is out there for you as well. You just have to be ready to take it. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-02-2822 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassOur tomorrow is todayBeing a victim is one of the most difficult things a person can experiences. Weather someone is hurting you are you are in the process or hurting yourself, know, things can get better. Let today be the tomorrow you have been waiting on. Lets get support and do all the little things we dreamt of doing when we were in that dark place. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-02-2022 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassAs survivors we are giftedAs  survivors we are gifted, we are educated, we are lucky, we are strong, we are messengers. We are an example to the survivers to come. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-02-1422 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassChild Abduction needs to stopChild abduction is happening all over the world. About 8 million children are reported missing each year worldwide. There is about 2300 children are reported missing daily in the US. Teenagers are the most common age group for abduction. this is very say lets do what we can to keep out children safe at home. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-02-0727 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassTaking some me time just taking care of meTaking some me time just to take care of yourself can be hard. Sometime it seems you are doing for everyone but you. when I fine that is happening to me, I stop and take a time out. Time out for me. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-01-3122 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassThinking about the cause of memory lossWhen it comes to memory loss, most of us have experience it once or know someone who have. Living with an abuser who hit us in the dead or us using drugs, alcohol, or smoke, can also cause us to have memory loss. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-01-2421 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassBlack on black crimeEven though blacks and whites use marijuana and other drugs, at about the same rate, Blacks are more likely to be charged with possession than whites  As African American, we have been and still are victims of society so why are we hurting each other. we need to come together. Don't let society dictates who we are and who we will become. Black on Black crimes needs to stop. As a survivor I know that many black women has been and still are being abused by their man or husband  They blame it on not be...2022-01-1723 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassRealizing I was no longer a victim but I was now a survivorAfter getting out of my abusive relationship, I realize he still controlled me. I realize I was still a victim because I, was still living my life as if he was there. in order to transition from a victim to a survivor, I had to make changes to how I live and the way I think.   --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-01-1023 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassStepping in 2022, taking the next stepAs victims and and survivors we have to give thanks we made it through the holidays and live to see 2022. This year is going to be our best year ever. We have so much to look forward to. IF we have not yet, this is the year we are going to take our life back. Take the next step into a better life. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2022-01-0318 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassSelf determination ! (Kujichagulia) the second principle of KwanzaaAs victims and survivors, we are a culture withing a culture. This New Year lets write out own story. We are determined to continue to make the right choices. We can be happy without losing ourselves. let's celebrate safe. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-12-2719 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassAre we our worst enemyAs the holiday comes closer, we need to fine the strength to stay safe and live to see the new year. Many people commit suicide this time a year. Lets remember we are not our worst enemy. We are strong. Lets live. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-12-2023 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassFinding your positive groove for the upcoming holidaysIt is almost three weeks left in the year. As victims and survivors, we have to find our positive groove for the upcoming holiday. Let's use the positive we learn to help us through the end of the year and after. We are strong. We can make it through the rest of the holiday to come.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-12-1318 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassGetting mentally ready for the holidaysThe holidays can be very difficult for victims and survivors. we need to be mentally prepared. I want us to continue to congratulate ourselves for making the right choices every minute of the day. If we continue to make the right choices, we can make it. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-12-0619 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassSurviving thanksgivingWe should congratulate ourselves and use the positive things did during thanksgiving to help us through the end of the year. Suicide is up over 30%. Many people commit suicide during Christmas than any other holiday. Let that not be any of us or anyone we know. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-11-2921 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassWhat is right with usWouldn’t it be nice if people start seeing the good in us and we begin to see the good in ourselves. We can then stat to ask ourselves the question what is right with me. Words has power. Action gives your words strength. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-11-2216 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassHow I felt after leaving my abuserEscaping from my abuser with my children was not easy but i did it. I now have a lifetime restraining order and I am happy. We should be able to make our own decisions. No one should control us. I want you to know if you are in an abusive relationship and you are ready to escape, you can. Get support. I am on the dancefloor waiting for you to join me. Happiness is waiting. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show...2021-11-1521 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassLeaving my Abuser for goodI went to visit my last apartment in Bronx  New York. The apartment where I lived with my first abuser and a short time with my second abuser. I  recall a lot of my memories in that apartment but no triggers. I do not know if it was because I had one of my sons with me. Whatever the reasons I was glad. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-11-0826 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassCan Abusers change?Being a survivor and living with not just one but two abusers, i wonder can an abuser change? i read it is possible if they really want to change. It is not for the victims to make them change. it is the abuser who needs to seek out the support and follow through. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-10-3122 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassMy Memoir/Becoming me Part IWhen I started this podcast I said I was going to share some of my poetry and my memoir with you.I have shared my poetry today i am sharing  a  section of my memoir. I will also input some of my poetry.  enjoy and give me your feedback. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-10-2429 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassListening to TY’s story/A Journey to recovery Ty a 30 year old man from Brockton has been using since he was young. He is now 4 years, 3 months and 13 day clean from all substances. Ty wants us to know that no one needs to die from addiction. We can survive and overcome whatever we put our mind to. Please join me in congratulating TY while he shares his amazing story. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-10-181h 06Through My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassPTSDPosttraumatic stress disorder, what is it.  (PTSD) is defined as a psychiatric disorder that may occur in people who have experienced or witnessed a traumatic event such as a natural disaster, a serious accident, a terrorist act, war/combat, or rape or who have been threatened with death, sexual violence or serious injury. As a black person I know many of us grow up in areas where we see people shot, kill, bullied, threatened. Learning your child or someone close to you was violently killed.  For some of us it is  common yet we do not get the support. We are...2021-10-1129 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassLung CancerThis is Breast Cancer awareness month. According to the CDC, Tobacco use is the leading cause of preventable disease, disability, and death in the United States. Nearly 40 million U.S. adults still smoke cigarettes, and about 4.7 million middle and high school students use at least one tobacco product, including e-cigarettes. Every day, about 1,600 U.S. youth younger than 18 years smoke their first cigarette. Each year, nearly half a million Americans die prematurely of smoking or exposure to second hand smoke --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify...2021-10-0424 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassYou are strongI am a survivor. I got out of an abusive relationship knowing that I was on my own. I had four children.  I had faith in myself that I could care for my children on my own.  I found out how strong i was and i want to tell you, you are strong too.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-09-2726 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassLosing a child hurtsHave you ever lost a child? I did. I lost one after birth and, one six years ago. Losing a child hurts more then giving birth. It hurts but we have to give tanks for the time we had to love our child. I will share one of my dreams i had. Come, listen. I hope you enjoy. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-09-2027 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassThe Tragedy and unity of 911        2751 and 2996 are very important numbers yet most people do not think about it very often. I am including myself. When one person or a group of people plan and carry out a deadly attack on a vast group of people without any remorse, it makes me wonder These people who died were not only citizen from the us but from other country. More than 90 countries  lost citizens. Countries like the United Kingdom, Dominican Republic, India, Greece, South Korea, Canada, Japan , Colombia, Russia, Jamaica WI, Philippines, Mexico,  Trinidad and Tobago , Ecuador, Australia, Germany, Italy, Bangladesh, Ireland, Pakistan, and Poland .2021-09-1321 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassDrawing positive energy from that special personI smile when I think about my special someone. Don’t get me wrong, he is not my man or a lover. He is  that special someone I think about when I feel low. I know we all have that special someone. We just have to search our mind. That one we can draw positive energy from. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-09-0621 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassLet's talk about itDo you have or know a child going off to school? Are they prepared?  They might have clothing and other material things, if you can afford them. That is great but have you had the talk with them. Children need to be mentally prepare as well. They need to know what to expect.  If our child makes it to college then you really need to have the stranger friend danger conversation. I am saying this because this is not just about girls. A large percentage of men are being sexually  assaulted in college as well. lets give out children the...2021-08-3028 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassVictims and survivers of Domestic vilenceThe CDC reoports that  Intimate partner violence "IPV starts early and continues throughout the lifespan. When IPV occurs in adolescence, it is called teen dating violence (TDV). TDV affects millions of U.S. teens each year. About 11 million women and 5 million men who reported experiencing contact sexual violence, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime said that they first experienced these forms of violence before the age of 18." Lets stop the cycle. No one has a right to put their hands on you without your permission. If your parner, husbnd, or wife  engage in...2021-08-2340 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassHaving a health body and mindI am not here to  tell you to loose weight. Losing weight does not necessarily mean you have a healthy body. If that is something you want to achieve go for it. More power to you. I have been thinking how having a healthy body and  mind can make for a happier life. Not for anyone just me. That means i will be in control of a happier me. Having a healthy mind and body is a way to keep control on ourself. If we can control ourself it become more difficult for other to control us...2021-08-1636 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassBeing in a RutI had a weird week. I felt ways i knew was different. Last night I examined my feelings and I taught, I figured it out. The closest I came to what was happening to me is that, I am in a rut. That is what I taught. I then went searching as to how I can make sure. I went on a few website. I landed on Psychology today. They had a checklist to help you self diagnose if you are in a rut.  I went through them. Low and behold, I concluded that yes, I am in a r...2021-08-0929 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassChildren with addicted parentsAccording  The National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) t’s estimated that 25 percent of youth under age 18 are exposed to family alcohol abuse or dependence. Research shows that children in this environment are more likely to develop depression or anxiety in adolescence and use alcohol or other drugs early on. Having a parent who is addicted to drugs or alcohol can lead to lifelong problems if the child or teen doesn’t get help and support."  Children with addicted parent are four times more likely to become addict Lets pray for them right Lets k...2021-08-0230 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassRelapseThe National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) estimates that relapse is so common during recovery that it occurs in 40% to 60% of people who are trying to end their substance use. This includes people who have received professional help at an addiction treatment facility. This relapse rate is said to be on par with other chronic illnesses, such as asthma, diabetes, and high blood pressure. 40%to 60 % is too high. Lets break the chain and stay healthy.  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/p...2021-07-2626 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking Glassworking with Victims and survivorsProviding care to victims and survivors can lead to stress, anxiety, fear, and other strong emotions. How does these support people manage their mental health. Yes it is their job, and they selected that profession. They do it because they care. I do not think anyone go to a job knowing what they are going to experience and how it is going to affect them.  Again how does these workers /support person cope with these emotions can affect their well-being. The care they give to others while doing your job  is critical. Let them know you appreciate them. ...2021-07-1929 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassToo much dying not enough caring, lovingWhen a love one dies who suffers? From experience I know that the people close to the person who dies and the ones who loves that person suffers. What is wrong with a little caring, a little love. We need to start caring about ourselves and each other. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-07-1226 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassThinking about the 4th of July in AmericaIt is estimate that at least 5,000 African-American soldiers served in the Revolutionary War. Black soldiers froze, starved, and died along with their white colleagues during the winter of 1777-78. The ones who made it home was treated like they did before they left while the white men was thanked and celebrated for a good job done. something was wrong with that then. I know thinks still have not changed. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-07-0524 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassLife expectancy of drug addictsThe latest studies show that life expectancy is 15-20 years from the moment of addiction, not to mention the physical and mental deterioration along the way. Cocaine addicts often die within 5 years from the time they begin heavy usage.... Lets talk about it --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-06-2728 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassHappy fathers day /surviving while being homelessCome listen as I speak to homeless father's on the street.    According to the CDC Homelessness as a Public Health Law Issue: Selected Resources On any given night, hundreds of thousands of people are homeless in the United States.1 These people might be chronically homeless, have temporarily lost their shelter, be fleeing domestic violence, or facing any number of other issues.2 Homelessness is closely connected to declines in physical and mental health; homeless persons experience high rates of health problems such as HIV infection, alcohol and drug abuse, mental illness, tuberculosis, and other con...2021-06-2156 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassBeing the parent of a victim of sexual abuseAccording to the CDC About 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 13 boys experience child sexual abuse at some point in childhood. 91% of child sexual abuse is perpetrated by someone the child or child’s family knows. Now lets talk about being the parent of a victim. The point here is you being the parent. How do you feel If your child  has been sexual assaulted. Do you feel anger, anxiety, sadness and fear. I felt these when my own daughter was sexual abused by someone we knew --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/sho...2021-06-1326 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassStressAccording to the CDC Stress can cause Feelings of fear, anger,      sadness, worry, numbness, or frustration Changes in appetite, energy,      desires, and interests Difficulty concentrating and      making decisions Difficulty sleeping or      nightmares Physical reactions, such as      headaches, body pains, stomach problems, and skin rashes Worsening of chronic health      problems Worsening of mental health      conditions that is a big one Increased use of tobacco, alcohol, and other substances  For abusers stress can make the lives of their victims more difficult. For victims just the stress of knowing theirs abusers are coming home at a certain time can be stressful. Lets fine s...2021-06-0730 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassGiving support without loosing yourselfHelping others is wonderful. It is the right thing to do but what about you. What I am going to tell you today is not to forget yourself I have had a rough week and I am realizing no matter what I do, it is never enough. I do and do and I support but, In the meantime some people do not seem to realize that I cannot always be there.  Take it further I get tired, and I am not away able to do. It makes me happy to help but I have not b...2021-05-3124 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking Glassacceptance with Family Therapist Theresa JenkinsToday’s podcast is about acceptance. I will have a conversation with family therapist Theresa Jenkins. First and most Theresa is a  Child of God, and a survivor. She is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist | M.A., Marriage and Family Therapy | Certified in Addiction Studies | Certified in Trauma Informed Practice. Theresa Jenkins. She is going to help us better understand where to go once we accept the fact that something is not right and we need help. Theresa works for the  Harvest House counseling. She is also listed in Psychology today under N.Y therapist or you can goog...2021-05-231h 04Through My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassAdult DepressionDepression is not just sadness it is painful. It is overwhelming. A lot of people mistake it for sadness. That is one of the reasons it is so hard to spot. I will tell you that it is not. Sadness is tangible. If you are sad more times or less you can explain why you are sad.  Depression is un explainable and leave us silent, numb. If someone tells you they are depress do not tell them you have or is sad too. Sadness us not depression. listen and support them --- Send in a voice message: https://p...2021-05-1726 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassYouth suicide according      to the CDC suicide is the SECOND leading      cause of death for ages 10-24. CDC      also reports that Suicide is the SECOND leading      cause of death for college-age youth and ages 12-18. This is serious and we need to take it seriously. As I person who taught that was a way out for me as well when I was young. I will tell you pay attention to the young children. look for the signs. I was glad that some one was there for me --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this...2021-05-0937 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassElder AbuseThis episode about Elder abuse. Approximately 1 out of every 10 Americans over 60 years of age have experience abuse yet, only one in 24 cases of abuse are reported. The annual loss of financial abuse is estimated to be $36.5 billion. The sad thing is elders who experience financial exploitation is self reported at a higher rate than sexual, physical, emotional, passive and other abuse. We need to educator ourselves and our elders . They need to know it is ok for them to let someone know they are being hurt. our elders should be care for not taken advantage of. --- Send...2021-05-0333 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassRe-victimizingIf you ask me how I am doing? I am standing next to many of my brother and sisters with a shovel in our hand ready to bury our next brother or sister. As victims and survivors try to go on with our daily lives we can experience triggers that can cause re-victimization. Lost of sleep, nightmare, lost of appetite and more. It can also make us so angry we can become abusers. lets support each other. On April 20, 2021 a cold hearted white former police officer I do not want to say his name. I thing saying...2021-04-2520 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassWhat makes us happyin this episode I spoke to people ages 11 to 65 years old who shared what makes them happy. Happiness is something we all can and should experience. Everyone can fine different things and people to help them fine happiness. I want victims to know they can fine joy in little things and they do not need anyone to make them happy. Lets all fine hippiness in the things and positive people arounds us. Come, listen and enjoy the testimony of the many happy people. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support...2021-04-1842 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassListening to the children with MichaelSometimes children just need us to listen. We have to listen to our children. Millions of children grew up with trauma caused by abuse from people that should have kept them safe. 37-year-old Michael is one of those people. Michael was born in Boston and grow up in the south shore. His early years were spent with his mother and sister. Michael was an adventurous teenager who did not have enough positive influences around him. He tried to fine things to keep him busy like hanging out with friends and riding dirt bike. He tried to explain...2021-04-1154 minFabuRocks PodcastFabuRocks PodcastThe AHA MomentAfter having a rough first day of shooting and not knowing if it was a humungous fail, it was time to look at the footage we had.  FabuDad had never edited a video in his life.  After many tutorials which taught him everything from intro to outro, transitions, overlays, lower thirds, and everything needed for a video to look good, his goal was to create something as cool and fun as what Fabu was already watching on other channels.  He wanted her to feel proud and happy with the results when she saw herself, hoping this would encourage her to...2021-04-0557 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassTrappedin this episode I talked about being trapped with your abuser. Weather it is physical abuse or an addiction, you can still be trapped in the  circumstances. I shared a poem about a mother bringing her innocent child to be abused by her master and a poem of an incident I experience when I was trapped.   --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-04-0526 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassSigns to look forAbusers can let you loose your identity if you let them. There are signs to look for.  Sexual and Physical, Domestic violence, or abuse Physiological  and emotional abuse. Financial or Material abuse, Discriminatory abuse, Organizational abuse are just of few. Experiences some of these can cause physical health problems, mental health problems, suicidal behavior, eating disorder, alcohol and substance abuse and aggression that can lead to criminal behavior. In this Podcast, I will talk about some of the signs.  Let us do what we can to change the statistic in America, that every minute there are...2021-03-2847 minFabuRocks PodcastFabuRocks PodcastHow We StartedFrom the moment Fabu started vocalizing, she seemed to have her own language, which sometimes only FabuMom would understand.  Fabu has always been a happy kid and expressed herself by hugging people.  She did not often get frustrated when she was not understood.  When asked a question she did not understand, she would answer in her own way, smile, hug you, and you clueless as to what she had just said. We thought the delay initially was because we are a bilingual family, which not only did we speak to her in both English and Spanish, but so...2021-03-2244 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassFinding myself through my story with Louis-AngelIn this episode, you will hear courageous 23 year old Louise-Angel telling his story.  Louis-Angel who says he got to the point where he said no to his addiction and being a victim and is now taking control of him. He feels pain is something we all share. Pain comes in many forms. He believes in hope and forgiveness to those who have done him wrong. Louis-Angel has been trying to survive since he was 4 years old when his mother went off to jail. At the age 16 while in high school, he was recruited to sell drugs by his trusted m...2021-03-211h 11Through My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassTaking controlToday, I will take you on a journey of empowerment. I will  share with you some of my poetry that talked about how I and other I know took control and say no more to the what was happening to us at that moment. Today is a heavy show. But this is reality --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-03-1451 minThrough My Looking GlassThrough My Looking GlassMy introduction of being an survivorLiving as a survivor is a everyday challenge. Even tough it is difficult, it does not have to control you. You can take control and live a productive life. Let the "how are you", help you push through. Please share your taught and ideas. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pauline-fabu/support2021-03-0726 min