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Fay Blakey And Rebekah Whitaker

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In Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouYou can do hard thingsTalking about 'we can do hard things'. This year, both Becki and Fay have done some 'hard things' and it's good to recognise what we can actually do because we don't always give ourselves the credit.  What are you doing that's a 'hard thing'? How are you coping, managing, getting on with it? Do you believe you can do these hard things? It's important to remember that we don't know what's going on for other people - and what hard things they're dealing with at any time - and so remembering to show p...2024-08-2618 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouSummer fun... and sleep!Are you having a break for the summer? Or are you powering through? In this episode, Fay and Becki are talking about their summer plans which seem to be a mix of work and a much looked forward to break.  We talk about the science behind why it's good to have a break and how this can re-energise us - and this led to a bit of a chat about sleep and how we both have and do use sleep for that energising factor.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com ...2024-08-1219 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouSod the restrictions - dream big and go again!Are you dreaming big? When we dream big, we might wonder - is it all a delusion of grandeur? I wonder what would happen if all entrepreneurs thought this way. But they don't. When met with failure, Richard Branson would say 'dream bigger - and go again!' When we're dreaming bigger, how are we thinking about our self worth? How do we plan and strategise to meet our dreams and aspirations? What can help us? Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - https://www.quest4e...2024-03-1821 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouYou're not a manager, so what you say doesn't matter! 😱This episode explores a common theme in leadership coaching for Becki and Fay - "I'm not a manager, so what I say doesn't matter!" Is this something that's true for you? Do you feel that your voice doesn't matter in a room? That your views aren't valid? As we explore this, we wonder if it's a cultural issue - or, what's in a title? This impacts people in terms of their frustrations, development, innovation, building relationships, and fostering leadership... Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  2024-03-1121 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you thinking for yourself?Today it's Fay's turn to have a rant! Do you follow Gurus on social media and take them at their every word? People set themselves up as 'experts' and we follow them - but then I see people losing the ability to think for themselves around the 'experts' subject. Asking questions like 'is this allowed?' Critical thinking and making decisions is our responsibility. If you really want to look for something, there will be evidence for something, everywhere - for and against. This is great because it means we don't...2024-03-0420 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre people biases standing in your way?Do you find yourself saying that people never listen to you? Or they never take you seriously? Or you have some other thought about someone that you take with you - maybe they often wind you up, etc.  Here's something to consider: if we only base the things we think about people from their past behaviours - they're never going to grow in the present. We can all change - and if people never allow you to show who you are now - then they will only ever know a previous version of you.  ...2024-02-2617 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWe can't do all the things all the time!Can you do everything? This year, so far, (2024), Fay has been making a jigsaw of her diary to get 'on top' of everything.  Subconsciously, she has seen messages from 'everywhere' saying 'you can't do everything'! What happens as a result of taking everything on board - where does this leave us as people? Before we know it, all our spare hours can be taken up with things we need to do - so we end up with no space to just 'be'. We can get into a habit of feeling that w...2024-02-1921 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouIs nothing pure anymore?Becki wonders 'Is nothing good and pure anymore in and of itself?' Things like: fiddling the algorithm on social media to your advantage; manipulating stories; getting one over on others for your own means, etc. Technology enables competition and allows us to get ahead. Subsequently, this takes away the purity we may once have taken for granted.  As consumers of technology and information, we must do our due diligence to ensure we're not being hoodwinked and manipulated. It certainly makes it very difficult to know what we can believe these days! 2024-02-1222 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you in alignment with your values?Are you in alignment with your personal values? Perhaps you’re not sure. Let’s face it, how often do we outwardly consider our values. But you will know when you’re out of alignment because something will just feel off. So, take this opportunity to think about your values – how are you feeling about them? Do you need to reframe them in any way to help you make meaning of where you are right now? Are they even still current? Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - https...2024-02-0521 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you worried how others perceive you at work?How do you think you're perceived at work? This episode is inspired by a few different female clients who have talked about being perceived as a bitch - either because they have something to say or because of their way of working.  This is something Becki talks about having experienced in the workplace herself. Do we need to worry about how others perceive us? It's about: taking on the role and doing our job putting the boundaries in place that enable us to do this being able to speak up i...2024-01-2920 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow wide is your 'Window of Tolerance'?Talking about the Window of Tolerance concept - coined by Dr. Dan Siegel, MD - how we understand and describe our body and brain reactions.  To have 'tolerance'. We all have a window for tolerance that can get bigger or smaller depending on what's going on in our lives.  How wide is your window of tolerance? What's happening in your life that might affect it - and how? What might you need to do to open up your window of tolerance and how will that impact you? To have a window of...2024-01-2219 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouIs 'coaching' becoming a bussword in Leadership Development?Is 'Coaching' becoming a bit of a buzzword in Leadership Development? Leadership development often talks about different leadership styles - and a coaching style is one. Still, we wonder if leaders are adopting a true coaching style or paying lip service to it! Coaching is different to advice and mentoring - and we often see some confusion here.  Key coaching skills that can be missed here are: deep listening; time for thought; letting go of the need to have the answers; and when and when not to use a coaching approach.  Co...2024-01-1527 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you valuing your team?How do you let your team know that they're important to you? Do you value them? Strong relationships are important with your team regarding productivity, performance and profits.  Everyone needs to understand WHY they come to work - how THEY make a difference - and if you're not valuing your team, that understanding can quickly disappear (on a personal level). You'll then start to see issues arise - absenteeism, productivity, etc.  Have listen to this episode for some ideas you can implement to show your team how you value them. Contact...2024-01-0824 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow the little things can make you feel stressedThings can easily become stressful situations - sometimes they're little things you feel shouldn't be stressful.  My stress will be different to yours.  What matters, is what we do about it.  At this time of year, we take on quite a mental load and there are expectations put upon us that we have to deal with. All of this can add to our stress bucket! It's important to recognise these little things, so that we can explore the reality of our situation and help ourselves through so that they don't add to...2023-12-1818 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you busy being busy?Are you busy being busy - busy keeping occupied doing things that you think are important - but are these things actually moving the needle for you? Do you know you're busy? Are you always busy? What are you achieving whilst you're busy? This then can lead to overwhelm - where are you with regard to this? All of this comes back to organisation? What is it that you actually want to get done? How can you make sure you do just that? We share some strategies for helping you to...2023-12-1122 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouBad LeadershipBad leadership - when do we see this and what does it mean? Toxicity - and the toxic culture - why does this happen? Egos! Are leaders making leadership about themselves? Is it even leadership if it's not working? Have a listen to see what we think - and of course, we'd love to know your thoughts too. Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.w...2023-12-0421 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhat would we be if we weren't coaches?In this episode, Becki poses the question "what would we be if we weren't coaches?" So we ponder on this - chat about what we've done before and what our interests are now - and what lights our fire.  Tune in to listen to find out! Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo.co.uk2023-11-2721 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouDoes remote working hamper your development?Does working on your own hamper your personal and professional development? - Talking about what we pick up from our working environment and working with other people.  We pick up so much from just being around other people - quick, short, sharp conversations or even listening to other conversations. Do we therefore struggle because we're not around other people so much? We're noticing people are happy to be socialising more again. There's also the fun element - bouncing ideas around the desk, which can lead to another level of conversation.  Contact...2023-11-2020 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe importance of clear communicationWe get a bee in our bonnets about communication! And so, this episode is about 'clear' communication and why it's important.  People's expectations can be managed with clear communication when we take responsibility for the messages we're giving.  Think - 'What do I need to communicate?''Is my message consistent?' 'What have I said before about this?' 'How can people find out more information about this? - or FAQs.' Also, consider what's easier for you - verbal or written communication. And consider who is receiving your communication - an...2023-11-1321 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhat do you need to give up, to get what you want?What are you willing to give up in order to get what you want? What a great question! Do you really need to give anything up - why can't you just have it all? But don't assume that you need to give up something good! Also, is it us trying to have it all that leads to chronic stress and burnout? We share an exercise to help you prioritise your goals - Warren Buffet's 'Danger 20'. Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - h...2023-11-0619 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe weight and responsibility of leadershipThe weight and responsibility of leadership - inspired by mine and Becki's clients.  Leadership training, courses, books - don't really cover what the role of leadership really means. Bringing leadership to a human level means 'who and I and where do I sit in leadership?' 'how can I lead and inspire people?' - it's a weight and a responsibility.  When we get into the nitty gritty of leadership roles, there's so much we weren't expecting to be there.  We don't want to be dragged down by the role - we can't ope...2023-10-3021 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhy having a hobby is good for youHow can hobbies help you with your development of yourself? Do you have a hobby? I talk about the fact that I don't have anything that I perceive to be a hobby. But do my hobbies look different to how I perceive other peoples to be? We talk about how hobbies can help you to regulate your nervous system and why that's important.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media fo...2023-10-2325 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you listening to your instincts?An episode inspired by the sitcom 'Schitt's Creek'! And we're talking about - can you trust your instincts? Where does the message come from when we feel we have instincts? The brain or the body? Past experiences or something new? We have data within our body that we can rely on - but we need to know how to access it and interpret it. So we give you an idea of how you can start to do this.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - ht...2023-10-1620 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouIs it too easy to put things down to luck?Today, we're talking about taking a different view of 'luck'. Is it really 'luck'? If not luck - then what is it?  We're talking about the choices we make as individuals. Sometimes when we observe others, we might think they're lucky if they have things that we don't.  But is it really luck, or a different lens, or choices that others make that we don't even think to make? Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk T...2023-10-0919 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouVicious and virtuous circlesWhen you feel you're stuck in a vicious circle - you're doing things that perpetuate where you are. But you can't always get off the circle.  When you break the actions, do new things, take different action, things change and a chain of change can start to happen - all of a sudden you can find yourself on more of a virtuous circle. - This is where positive thinking tends to happen.  What vicious circles are you on and what changes do you need to make? Contact Fay - https://www.fa...2023-10-0216 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe responsibility of life changing choicesKnowledge is empowering - once you know better, you have the ability to do better.  But - sometimes we wish we didn't know certain things - because that means we have to make a choice: Ignore the new knowledge OR implement the change - and embrace the impact the change will bring.  Is this a barrier for you if you want to develop yourself further? Once you know new things - are you ready to implement the change and are you prepared for that change? We talk today about managing that change - pe...2023-09-2523 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow you do anything is how you do everything!How you do anything is how you do everything! - This statement gets us thinking - is this true? Perhaps on a very big picture level - but certainly not when you get into the nitty-gritty of a situation.  Perhaps this way of doing things comes in waves throughout our lives - it's not linear, depending on what we're doing at any given time.  What are your thoughts? Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to...2023-09-1818 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow personal branding can help your successPersonal branding - perhaps not something you think about unless you're a business owner. When you work in an organisation, you may not often think about your personal branding in the role you have.  Personal branding: what do you want to be known for?  Personal brand is about knowing your purpose - what are you here to do? How do you visualise that? And how does that sit with your values? And this can be helpful in terms of how you climb the ladder of your career; the types of jobs you do; th...2023-09-1124 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow acceptance will help you to move onIn this episode we're looking at making the best of situations - acceptance of what's going on for ourselves.  When things happen to us, our sympathetic nervous system is activated - our fight, flight and freeze response. Accepting what happens in our lives can help to bring our nervous system out of the fight, flight, freeze response and back to our executive functioning so that we can get on with our lives in a healthy and sustainable way.  In order to do this, we can accept. Feel the feelings and think the thoughts, which will he...2023-09-0417 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouStarting something is a decisionTalking about being ready to do something. Being ready is actually a decision that we make! What does this mean? It means we make a decision to do something - rather than waiting for the motivation to start. Sometimes we get out dopamine from things that fly in the face of the things we want to achieve - so making the decision to do something means that you have to be aware of what could stop you, how it makes you feel, think and behave - and what needs to be different.  2023-08-2823 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better You - We're 100!A special episode. This is number 100! A milestone. We're celebrating being in pursuit of the better you! We're re-visiting the essence of the podcast and chatting about what it means to us to be in pursuit of the better us.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo.co.uk2023-08-2123 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouNew identity and life after leaving the US Army, with Dr. Tony CerellaIn this episode, we're joined by Dr. Tony Cerella ACC, who talks to us about transitioning from a long standing service in the US Army. How this is, when 23 years of your life and identity is one thing, to then being in a whole new world.  Tony talks about navigating his feelings, his meaning, his worth - for himself and his family.  He talks about being coached at the start of his transition and how coaching changed his life - so much so, that he is now trained as an ICF accredited coach, to...2023-08-1430 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouManaging difficult conversationsHow can we have difficult conversations in a healthy and productive way? Often we avoid the difficult conversation - but in doing this, we're not helping ourselves - it doesn't make the issue go away.  Difficult conversations and situations will always exist - and subjects might be emotive, so we need to consider how we need to be in order to sort them out well.  Understanding the person we're having the conversation with is vital and setting up the communication so that it's objective (perhaps processes need to be in place). Si...2023-08-0722 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow to ignite your creativityWhat happens when you don't feel creative? When you're not on it. How do you turn those feelings around? What does creativity even mean to you? We're talking here about how creativity may look different to how you think it should - perhaps we need to be creative about how we're creative. Are you giving yourself permission to think that you can have good ideas and be creative? Creativity doesn't always come when you want it to. You likely won't be creative when you're sat at your desk. Your brain needs some downtime in order...2023-07-3129 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you 'all or nothing' or 'slow and steady wins the race'?We've realised we actually disagree with each other on something! Shock horror! Fay is very much an 'all or nothing' kind of person. Becki is more 'slow and steady wins the race'. We both have the same goal at the moment - but we're approaching it from different ways. We'll have to wait to see which may work better - if any! But when you consider how you approach your goals - which way works best for you? Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  R...2023-07-2421 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe truth about jealousyTalking about jealousy today in this episode - what does this mean for us when we're feeling all the feels of jealousy.  Becki and I invite you to think about when you last felt jealous and what was going on there? What was it all about? Often, we can feel jealous because we're feeling 'I wish...' 'I want to do that too.' Wishing we'd done something that we're seeing others do.  We explore if it's healthy to be a bit jealous, but what happens when it gets more than just a bi...2023-07-1722 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow to speak up in meetings.How are you at speaking up in meetings? Are you shy? Do you not like the sound of your voice? Do you think your opinions aren't valid? What would give you the confidence to speak up in meeting? Facilitation of meetings is important to consider when being or feeling able to speak up in meetings. How are you being included? - How are you including others? It's important to have your voice heard in meetings - this is where innovation happens, collaboration, getting known for who you are - and also...2023-07-1024 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you aware of your impact and influence?How clear are you on who you are and what you do so that you can be impactful and influential in your role? Are you trying to influence someone - who maybe can't be influenced? How much time are you spending here? What might you need to do or think differently? A useful tool to help you understand how you can think and do differently, is Stephen Covey's circles of influence. It helps us realise what we can control and what we can't. And as such, what do you need to let go of? 2023-07-0319 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouReframing failureTalking about failure - thinking about reframing our thoughts here - and the idea of embracing the possibility of failure.  How does failure fit with 'fixed' and 'growth' mindset - the work of Carol Dweck? Becki asks the question - what are you willing to fail at, as a manager or a leader? Fay responds to that question in that she's not 'willing' to fail but she's accepting that she's not always going to be 100% - and has the ability to sit back and reflect on what didn't go right.  What do...2023-06-2624 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhy preparing for your appraisal is importantIn this episode we're thinking about preparing for an appraisal / performance review. How does it make you feel if you're asked to bring a list of your achievements to your appraisal?  What else do you need to do to prepare to the best of your ability so that you go into your appraisal feeling comfortable and confident? Have a listen, because as always, we have some tips for you.  Also - if appraisals are just paid lip service in your organisation - then do listen in to find out why they're an...2023-06-1922 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe 'Wheel of LIfe'In this episode, we share a great coaching tool called 'The Wheel of Life' - it's a really versatile tool that could help you in your life, or your career, or a relationship - anywhere where things aren't quite in balance.  We explain how to use the wheel and how you can self-coach yourself and reflect on what's important to you - where are you now, where do you want to be - and how you can get there.  When you've completed the Wheel, you'll have a personal plan to help you move forward in wh...2023-06-1223 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you belonging - or just fitting in?What's the difference between belonging and fitting in? As human beings, we have that need for connection - our network and our connection with others to help us thrive. But there are 2 sides to this - the fact that we fit in and the other side, belonging.   We can often make sure we fit in - to ensure our needs are met - but how do we get to the point of belonging - and what's the difference? Have a listen to find out.  Contact Contact ...2023-06-0524 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you always eating the broken egg? (Are you on the crappy end of the stick?)Are you always eating the broken egg? I.e. if something isn't quite right - do you always give yourself the 'crappy end of the stick'? Those things that lead to you re-thinking situations are often bought about by the small things that you put up with - little molehills that mount up over time.  If we flip this - the other side  might be that you're good at asking for your needs to be met - and having a sense of your own self worth.  But can you have a sense of you...2023-05-2927 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow will your 'future self' thank you?In this episode, we're thinking about the things we do that our future selves will and won't thank us for.  And this is about becoming quite conscious of what we are doing in the moment - and the impact that that has for you in the future.  Sometimes we have to think about what we really want and how our daily actions impact what we ultimately want. Sometimes we think 'oh just this once' but those small actions can have big impact and if they're not positive actions then the overall result is unlikely to be...2023-05-2222 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow office chit chat builds relationshipsIn this episode, we're talking about the value found in work conversations that aren't about work.  What do you actually know about your colleagues? How does that help you with your social relationships? There's a lot that comes from chit-chat. Primarily a human need to be social and fill our happiness cup. Also, how much more we can get out of 'work' relationships when we build trust and safety with our work colleagues.  Listen to hear about Becki's 'ice breaker' exercise and how Fay cracked a relationship that was seemingly a little hard go...2023-05-1524 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhy coaching is essential for high performersHigh performers in the workplace - and how coaching can be a really fabulous intervention to develop high performers more fully. In this podcast, we're busting a myth that coaching is an intervention to fix problems - it's the opposite! Coaching is essential to help you get from good to great!  One of Becki's dreams is that all organisations employ a coach in residence to normalise going to see a coach - when things are going well. Coaching allows you to take thinking time. These days, with hybrid working, we miss out on t...2023-05-0824 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe importance of Personal EffectivenessWhat's personal effectiveness - what does it mean to you and what can you do to develop it? It's all about you performing at your best - but thinking about the non-technical skills within your role - which allow you to knit your technical skills together. Things like communication; time-management; confidence; stress management, etc... It is what it says on the tin - but also leading into how you're being effective as a person, a team and in your organisation.  These personal effective skills really support your technical abilities.  In this ep...2023-04-2421 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouDoes 'common sense' even exist?On undertaking a 'Strengthscope' test, Fay's greatest strength, within the context of work, came out as 'common sense' - and it made her feel a little bit weird.  On mentioning this to Becki, Becki laughed! And so, in this episode, we're exploring common sense. Becki questions whether common sense is even a thing - on the back of our common sense coming off the back of our personal lived experience - and we're all different - so how much is actually common? We'd love to hear your thoughts.  Contact...2023-04-1024 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWelcoming innovation into our daily livesToday, we're talking about innovation and what it means to you.  We both shy away from the word 'innovation', it's always felt like quite a big thing - world changing with a great sense of meaning, new inventions for example - but in reality we can be innovating all the time - small things that change the way we do certain things to make things better for ourselves.  This episode brings this meaning home and we explore how we can be innovative, daily and the barriers you might see to innovation.  Contact F...2023-04-0323 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouPutting the 'I' back into teamsThis week we're challenging a  well known phrase "there's no 'I' in team!" Teams are full of individuals - and each individual is an entity in their own right - and the team will be made up of differing behaviours and strengths - and all of this is valuable to strengthen the team.  Understanding the team will help you to communicate well and work together to a point where you're not stifling innovation, creativity and growth.  As humans, we all require recognition and as individuals as part of the team, we need to rec...2023-03-2727 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe personal development journey - with Ruth KudziSpecial guest, Ruth Kudzi, joins us today to talk about her own personal develpment journey.  Ruth is a successful entrepreneur  - founder of Optimus Coach Academy - training coaches to ICF standards, and Ruth Kudzi Coaching - combining evidenced based approaches of neuroscience and psychology and is passionate about behavioural change.  Ruth shares that, for her, personal development is about understanding yourself a bit better and being able to improve all areas of your life.  This podcast explores Ruth's journey and her thoughts and insights into the wonderment of personal development and how it's...2023-03-2033 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouClarity is sanity!The issue of clarity often comes up during coaching sessions - who we are, what we want to do, what we want to achieve, who we want to be, etc. All our thoughts and possibilities jumble in our head and we can struggle to make sense of them alone. We can find ourselves doubting our abilities and talking ourselves out of what we want, as we try to order our thoughts.  Often, talking out loud can help us understand our thought processes - can help us make sense of our thinking. Especially if we can g...2023-03-1323 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouYou've got to see it to be it!What's in the phrase "you need to see it to be it!" How true is this for you? We know what's available for us through seeing other people doing their thing.  However, with changes in technology at such a vast rate - we don't even know what might exist in the future for us! So we have to be open to the opportunities - and perhaps be trail blazers.  Perhaps you're a trail blazer right now - what are you doing to be the inspiration for others? "Admire, Aspire, Ac...2023-03-0622 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow to set and maintain your personal and professional boundariesTalking about boundaries today - setting, maintaining and updating them as our life and work change.  How do you feel about setting boundaries and do you do this effectively? When we think about boundaries - we need to think about why we want them - what do we want to have in place and how important is this to us? Knowing this will help us to keep these boundaries! It's all about communication - managing your own and others expectations - and giving yourself and others permission to do things the way we w...2023-02-2728 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe bullsh*t we tell ourselvesThe bullsh*t we tell ourselves - the instances that stay with us that we make meaning of throughout our lives.  We all do it but I guess the stories and the bullsh*t varies! In this episode we both talk about times of our lives that we've made meaning of - and how this plays out in who we are today. How we show up, how we speak up, who we are.  But how true is that and how can we look at this differently?  Contact Fay - htt...2023-02-2023 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe value of role modelsRole models - have you had role models? Fay certainly has - but Becki hasn't had a role model. So in this episode we discuss this - why I have found role models important and inspiring and how Becki has managed without! Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com  Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo.co.uk2023-02-1326 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouA new role? What support do you need?In this episode, we're talking about new roles and promotions, and the support you get or give your staff to ensure you/they are able to perform well and confidently at that new level. There's a danger that when you get promoted, you can feel cast out of the clan. Your comrades are no longer your close comrades - you've been removed from the group and your natural social norms become different.  When this isn't supported or managed well, it can be detrimental to you/the person being promoted.  To the point where doing the ne...2023-02-0632 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouPromoting positive conversations by asking the right questionsIn this episode we're talking about how we ask questions in a way that promotes us having positive conversations.  How the questions we ask can promote as sense of autonomy and responsibility and independent thinking.  We explore using the question prefix 'why' - and how this can sometimes sound like you're nit picking - or sounding like you object to something that's been done - how we can ask questions differently. We share the 'Six Honest Serving Men' which can help you with how you ask questions - and how asking open questions op...2023-01-3027 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow accountability can help you succeedAccountability - how we can work with other people to help us be accountable to meet our goals, our intentions.  When we start something new, we're often very focused and intentional - but often, we'll hit some kind of wall and sometimes this can completely stop us in our tracks - even though we know that the success we want to see is on the other side of that wall. Often the wall is bigger than the success in the context we're living through at that point in time. In this episode, we talk about a...2023-01-2322 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouVulnerability - a weakness or a strength?Vulnerability - a word used a lot in personal development - what do you think about it? Do you struggle to understand your vulnerability - do you feel it means you're weak if you're vulnerable?  In this episode, we talk about what vulnerability means to us and how we can find strength in our vulnerability.  We discuss how we can use our vulnerability in a way that works for us, personally.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk T...2023-01-1623 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWord of the year!Happy New Year! Are you raring to go and excited for 2023? Have you got a word for the year? I wasn't feeling it to start with - but then my word hit me like a sledgehammer! Find out what my word is and whether Becki has a word by tuning in - and seeing what we want to achieve, how that relates to our businesses and our personal lives.  I'd love to know if our words relate to your plans too. Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.c...2023-01-0923 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre your friendships in decline?Are your friendships in decline? According to an American Perspectives Survey in 2021 and compared with a Gallop survey in 1990 - in 1990 no men said they had no close friends - and yet in 2021, 15% said they had no close friends. For women in 1990 none said they had no close friends - and in 2021, 10% said they had no close friends.  So, according to these figures, there seems to be a decline in friendships.  Today on the podcast, this is what we're chatting about - and our own friendships and how they've changed over th...2022-12-2625 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouStrategy, Mindset and Energy - bringing all 3 to the table for successToday we're talking about strategy, mindset and energy. Often we feel that we just need a strategy to get stuff done - to get us from where we are to where we want to be. We also hear a lot about having the mindset to get stuff done. But the third piece is energy - if you don't have the right energy behind you to propel you forward, you're going nowhere fast! So we're talking about using strategy, mindset and energy interchangeably to help you move forward - and how you bring all three to...2022-12-1925 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouActions speak louder than wordsIn this episode, we're looking at how our behaviours go before us to show our actions - and how our actions can speak louder than words.  Notably, and still, just about topical, we were impressed by the Japanese Football Team, displaying their 'off the pitch' behaviours during the World Cup 2022 - and the behaviours of their fans.  Are your actions congruent with how you speak? Are those of your team? What could you do differently to 'show' your values through your behaviours? Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Re...2022-12-1224 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhat advice would you give your younger self?We get to an age when we get nostalgic - "ooh, if I could have done things differently..." - do you think you'd have taken the advice if you'd have had it? Becki talks about the Baz Luhrmann's song 'Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen" - click here to listen. Lot's of advice here in the song - but do we listen to it?! We talk about the type of advice we might give ourselves.  What advice would you give to your younger self? And what's the best piece of advice that you've ever h...2022-12-0520 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouBreaking it down : Why getting stuck into the nitty-gritty can help you achieve your goals.Today we're talking about the importance of breaking things down and getting specific into the detail of what you're doing - what you want to develop and make successful. When we don't get specific we can get lost in the overwhelm and what we're working on can become a big stumbling block that we just can't get past.  But when we break this down into sizeable chunks, we can work one chunk at a time, which can be enormously helpful. When we do this, the things that we thought were big and scary, actually aren't that bad!2022-11-2824 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better You"The past is a foreign country, they do things differently there." L. P. HartleyIn this episode, we take inspiration from this quote from L. P. Hartley "the past is a foreign country, they do things differently there." Many of us get stuck in our past - telling ourselves the things we can and the things we can't do - rather than looking at our present, the here and now - what can we do right now and what can we do in the future.  It's such a powerful quote - we get so hung up on how we do things and we take all that forward with us, r...2022-11-2126 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhat you do when you've 'got one on ya!'What do you do when you're in a bit of a funk? What do you do when you want to change your mood - change your state? (When you've 'got one on ya!') Sometimes, we're not firing on all cylinders. Sometimes we might not want company. Sometimes we could argue with ourselves.  What do you do to change this? If, in fact, you even want to! We can't always be in tip-top condition. What do you do to recognise this and what helps you when you're in this state? We t...2022-11-1427 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouLife throught OUR OWN lens - the stories we tell ourselvesDo you ever have to have a word with yourself - for looking at situations through your own lens but in reality, you may have got things a little bit wrong? Do you find yourself saying "it's alright for you because..."? Could this be you making an assumption? In this episode, this is what we're exploring - and getting a bit scientific about the thoughts we think - why we think certain things and what the brain does with these thoughts - importantly, how we can change these thoughts.  Contact 2022-10-3126 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhat do you want to be when you grow up?This week it's half term in both Becki's household and mine - a week with the kids off school and the work/holiday juggle.  So this week we thought it would be great to have a dive into nostalgia to talk about what we wanted to be when we grew up! Have a listen to hear what influenced our thoughts back then, what deterred us from taking different career paths and what we think about it.  And feel free to dip into your own nostalgia too - what did you or do you wa...2022-10-2429 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouImposter Syndrome - with Caroline FlanaganThis week, we're joined by Caroline Flanagan - fellow coach whose expertise is Imposter Syndrome.  We discuss what Imposter Syndrome is and how you can make it a strength to propel you forward instead of allowing it to hold you back. People often have Imposter Syndrome but don't realise it because they might have never heard of it! So we discuss the symptoms and secret signs to help you identify if you have it. And Caroline shares her process to stop it from taking the wheel of your life.  If you'd like to fi...2022-10-1736 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWe are 1! Happy birthday to us!This is a very special episode as it marks our 1st birthday - a great podcasting milestone.  Today, we share our thoughts and feelings around doing the podcast and 5 reflections / learnings and how these relate to life in general.  Tune in to listen to our lessons and find out which episodes are our favourites.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo.co.uk2022-10-1022 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhat's your personal development nemesis?The whole podcast is about personal and professional development - but we both realise that the journey isn't all moonlight and roses.  Today, we're talking about our personal development nemesis! We both have the same one (and probably lots of other ones too!) Tune in to hear what we struggle with - what we think about it and what we each do about it. And let us know if you struggle with this too. Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.c...2022-10-0329 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouLook out for your basic needs as the cost of living goes up!Today we're talking about the state of the nation: the great resignation; low employment; high cost of living; drought; warming climate.  How does this relate to Maslow and his Hierarchy of Needs? Where are we on the hierarchy at the moment and how does this impact us and those around us? Only when we have our physiological needs met, can we move up the hierarchy - but right now, our physiological needs are being compromised. If we can't meet these needs we can go into a state of anxiety - and this breeds f...2022-09-2624 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhat defines your self-worth?Do you have a good sense of your self-worth? Do you maintain boundaries in your life which reflect your self-worth? What defines your self-worth? "When we feel that we aren't enough or that we aren't good enough, we also fear that we'll never have enough" Nancy Levin We explore our worth on this week's episode of the podcast. Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo...2022-09-1925 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouPersonal Development - the journey without endIn this episode, we're discussing Personal Development - and how this can seem to be a journey without end.  Often, things can spring up that might surprise us - the way we react to things, thoughts we think and how we respond.  We talk about our own experiences, we talk Transactional Analysis  and we even touch on Human Design and how this impacts our personal development journeys. Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wah...2022-09-1227 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouPerspective: Why 'seeing the other side of the story' can be a good ideaWhen we get stuck in our thinking, we think our thoughts are real - the truth. But there's often a different way of thinking - another side of the story - that could be beneficial to us.  In this episode, we explore how living our side of the story makes life easy. Sometimes it's difficult to look at things from different angles. Our echo chambers and lived beliefs often support our thinking - so we defend our thinking when others offer a different point of view.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com...2022-09-0529 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow neuro-diversity can be a superpower in the workplace - with Mike ColeMike Cole joins us as our guest today.  Mike believes there's so much potential being constrained and hidden in people with neuro-diversity - and this needs to be set free - a boost to happiness and productivity (such a win-win). In this episode, we explore how to use near-diversity as a superpower, so that you can stop hiding in the shadows. To find out more about Mike and the work he does with his clients - please visit his website here: https://thismikecole.com/PursuitPodcast and you can follow Mike on social m...2022-08-2245 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhich hats are you wearing today?Which hats are you wearing today? As we go through our days, we often have to do many different things - some things we must be quite proficient at. These require different hats! In this episode, we explore how wearing these hats impacts our mental load - and how that affects our performance.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo.co.uk  2022-08-1531 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThree little words with BIG impact!If ever there were three little words with BIG impact, in addition to 'I love you' these words are 'can't', 'should' and 'just'. How often do you find yourself using these words - and what do they mean for you?  This episode explores how we use these words and what they've meant for us in the past. We know it can be difficult always to be consciously aware of the language we use - but understanding the science behind these words might help you reflect on how you use them. We'd love to h...2022-08-0828 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouGive yourself permission to be more confidentConfidence is a beautiful and important trait to have. In this episode, we're looking at how confidence impacts all we do. Confidence always shines through when we're putting ourselves out there - we all have it. But are we overthinking it - are we using it as an excuse not to put ourselves out there - to keep ourselves back? Is that because we see confidence as arrogance? Or is there a difference? Are you holding yourself back from being too confident because you don't want to be seen as showing off? 2022-08-0126 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow to sustain your performance levelsIn this episode, we look at how we can improve our performance personally and professionally. But do we need to do this with the pressure of the 'always on' culture, which often leads to burnout.  How do we perform in a sustainable way? If we don't look after our physical and mental health, then we CAN NOT sustain our performance - and if we are always on, nose to the grind, then we CAN NOT sustain our mental and physical health.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah...2022-07-2530 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow to coach yourself through a situationIn this episode, we share half a dozen of our favourite coaching questions that might help you to coach yourself through a situation. We talk about why these questions might be helpful to you - how they can help you to move forward.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo.co.uk2022-07-1823 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouHow to deal with the drama in your lifeFirst of all - this is the first episode of our re-branded podcast.  Fay and Becki will no longer be meeting on the M53 BUT we are 'in pursuit of the better you' and we will continue to be supporting your journey in personal and professional development. We hope you like our new look! Today, we're talking about how you can tame the drama in your life.  How to recognise it - recognise your part in it - and how you can change your own behaviour and influence the behaviour of others  - and...2022-07-1127 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe body and all its intelligences - with Caroline QuaifeToday we're talking about somatic coaching with our special guest, Caroline Quaife.  Did you know that your body adopts a shape as a reaction to what we learn in the world around us? Somatic coaching can help us influence and make micro changes to our shape to help us be more in the here and now. These micro-changes can be hugely impactful.  We talk about:  - how the body knows what to do to support us as humans  - integrating mind, body and spirit in our day-to-day lives  - how somatics supports our h...2022-07-0430 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhat does 'happy' mean to you?In this episode, we explore what happiness means - is it a state of being - a state of contentment and satisfaction - or is it more in the lines of pleasure? It's quite a hard question. What makes you happy? Why is happiness important - how does it help us in our daily lives? Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo.co.uk2022-06-2726 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe importance of purpose (Ikigai)What's your Ikigai? Ikigai is the Japanese secret to a long and happy life. The thought of living your purpose - and everything you do has a purpose - and how this can enhance your life at every stage and with every task.  How living with purpose and living in flow keeps a well-balanced and healthy body and soul.    Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our pro...2022-06-1926 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouAre you a loserAre you a loser? In this episode, we discuss the lack of competition we have in our lives - and that often, even if we don't win at something, we look for the good, the wins in the journey, if you like. Whilst this isn't a bad thing - we learn from everything, we must also acknowledge that we probably lose more or are more unsuccessful than a winner or successful. Our losses help the process - but they're losses all the same.  Where's the shame in saying 'I didn't win this time'? What's the p...2022-06-1321 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThe human need to be recognisedAs human beings, we have an intrinsic need for recognition from birth. To start with, it was a way of getting other needs met - i.e. we cried when we were hungry or uncomfortable - we learnt that our cry would send a message to our parents (or our carers) to highlight the fact that we had a need - our carer would then recognise our need.  As we grow and develop, the need for recognition remains. In this episode, we look at Transactional Analysis theory to discuss this need that we all have t...2022-06-0629 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouInvesting in you isn't a luxury!Do you invest in yourself to help develop yourself into who you want to be? In this episode, this is what we discuss - the benefit of personal and professional development. Investing in yourself is NOT a luxury - we're not on this planet just to survive - we're here to thrive and we can't do that by just being. We need to choose who we want to become and take action.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you t...2022-05-3030 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouCultivating trust in relationshipsIn this episode, we talk about trust and the importance of cultivating trust in your relationships - personal and business.  Trust is the basis for good relationships and we all need these good relationships to help us through life and work. How are you cultivating trust? Do you trust others? Are you trustworthy?! Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo.co.uk2022-05-2328 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouCatastrophising on purpose!In this episode, we're talking about catastrophising on purpose! Instead of trying to shrug off the fear we feel - what would happen if you blew up the fear to the worst-case scenario? You might find that it's not as bad as you think it's going to be.  What's the worst that could happen?  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo.co.uk2022-05-1625 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouIs knowledge power?Do you feel you need to know everything? Perhaps you think if you don't know everything, you won't succeed? Perhaps you think that knowledge is power? Fay says that the more she learns/the more she knows - the more she realises there is to learn/know. Can we ever know everything? In this episode, we question whether knowledge is power. And do we hold ourselves back if we don't think we know enough? Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk2022-04-2527 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouTalking self-leadership with Andrew WhitakerWith our special guest, Andrew Whitaker (who might just be Becki's older brother!), we talk about his fascinating career and the work he does in preparing students at The White Rose Academies Trust to become global citizens and to live as their authentic selves.  We talk about self-leadership and why taking responsibility for your life is so important and powerful in order to live your purpose.  Contact Andrew Whitaker - https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrew-whitaker-28b19133/ Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co...2022-03-1441 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouWhat have Fay and Rebekah been reading?As ICF accredited coaches, professional development is vital for both of us - it's a good job we both have a real love of learning and development.  In this episode we discuss books that we've read which have really impacted our thoughts, the work we do and why.    Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at Wahhoo Media for our production: https://www.wahhoo.co.uk2022-03-0731 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouYou have superpowers! Are you using them?In this episode, we look at our Superpowers! Our strengths! We explore: - why, as humans, we don't like promoting our strengths - why it feels like we're showing off! - how to identify our strengths - we look at our own strengths (Becki and Fay) - how working in our area of strength helps us to be in a state of flow - how strengths help team development - how we can bring our superpowers to the party What would happen if...2021-12-1326 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouLeadership development efforts are a total waste of money!In this episode, Fay gets vexed and Becki talks about onions! Worldwide, $356 billion is spent by organisations on leadership development efforts. A survey of over 300 organisations said that over 75% felt that these programmes weren't very effective because most of this development overlooks the foundations of how leaders think, learn and behave - their mindset! We discuss this and talk through our personal views based on our experiences.  Contact: Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com Rebekah - https://www.quest4est.co.uk Thank you to Jon at W...2021-11-0825 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouBecki was an engineer!In this episode, Fay interviews Becki! Why? - because Fay is intrigued to know why and how Becki had a career in engineering and how that changed and she is now a coach working with emerging leaders.  - Fay is also intrigued to hear about Becki's career as a woman in, what is predominantly, a man's world.  - Becki talks about her career from the start - from an engineering apprentice, to a professionally qualified coach for emerging leaders.  Contact Fay - https://www.fayblakey.com R...2021-11-0140 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouThere is life after 30!In this episode, we talk about whether there is life after the age of 30 - Becki talks about worries her friends and clients have - that they feel they need to fit so much into their lives before they turn 30 - Becki and Fay talk about how life doesn't change at 30 - or even 40 for that matter and that there will be opportunities throughout your life, no matter your age. Contact Fay & Rebekah Thank you to Jon from Wahhoo Media for our production2021-10-2218 minIn Pursuit of the Better YouIn Pursuit of the Better YouComparison is the thief of joyIn this episode, we talk about how we compare ourselves to others. Particularly: - how Becki was struck with major comparisonitis throughout her engineering career - how Becki compared herself to other women - how Fay noticed comparisonitis turn up in her life when she started her own business - but it didn't really figure in her employed life - what you can do to help yourself if comparisonitis is showing up for you. Contact Fay & Rebekah Thank you to Jon from Wahhoo Media for...2021-10-1224 min