Shows
The Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastTriggers are potholes for Porn AddictsSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreA poem by Portia Nelson, published in her bookThere's a Hole in My Sidewalk: The Romance of Self-Discovery Verse II walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk I fall in. I am lost ... I am helpless. It isn't my fault. It takes forever to find a way out. Verse II I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don't see it. I fall in ag...2025-01-1709 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastTriggers may be an ally, not a foe - Sex Addiction clients!Send us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreTriggers are a clue to our dissociated Traumas - So says Carolyn Spring in Part 2 of her article on Managing Triggers: https://www.carolynspring.com/blog/we-have-two-choices-when-triggered/The past events that we want to avoid thinking about or confronting, may be the very things that we need to go after and change. That sounds like hard work and painful - to me. Yet - it may be worth it people!Triggers can signpost us to...2025-01-1010 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Podcast'Insecure Attachment' = Detachment, Rejection, Loss, Let go of - to Sex/Porn/Love AddictsSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreThe Insecure 'ATTACHMENT' label does not describe accurately, what is really in the can with this label on it! It is exactly the opposite. It typically is set up in the early childhood development years. Often, they are experiences which you can't readily or easily access; but your brain remembers them well and put an identification label/marker on each of them, as and when they occurred.You cannot necessarily find or access them or the details...2024-11-1508 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastThe antidote to Narcissism for Sex Addicts, is EmpathySend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreNarcissism and Empathy (like same poles of a magnet) cannot co-exist together in the same space. They repel each other. Likewise, they cannot co-exist in the same person at equally high levels.Either they will have a high level of Narcissistic traits and a low level of Empathy or vice versa. Work on Empathy and you will see Narcissistic traits recede over time. Remember, there can be no quick fixes in this work with The Kairos Centre...2024-11-0109 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastNarcissistic - who? Not me! - just because of sex Addiction!Send us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreDon't go looking up the term on Google and it spewing out a whole heap of stuff that blinds you and gets your back up! I am not suggesting Sex/Porn/Love Addicts are a Narcissists - Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) - is one of the most difficult mental Health diagnosis to treat. It requires a particularly skilled diagnosis.What I am saying is that they will have, and be manifesting 'traits' which come from Narcissism. What...2024-10-2510 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastSHAME + NARCISSISM = SEX ADDICTIONSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreSHAME + NARCISSISM = SEX ADDICTION. Too simplistic? Maybe, but it is a good place to start, if you want to better understand the reason for the activities - as an outlet for Shame & Narcissism.Try hard to come out from under the umbrella of covering that Shame provides - but is unseen. It covers the Addict and a partner. It keeps them hidden and in hiding. yet, the antidote to shame is to come out of...2024-10-1809 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Podcast"SHAME on you" - are particularly triggering, toxic & impactful words to Sex AddictsSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreShame is set up in childhood. Life is unfair. Yep.The presence of shame is a particularly powerful driver for sexual addiction. Shame means “to hide” and is a hidden companion of Narcissism.SHAME + NARCISSISM = SEX ADDICTIONShame is the painful feeling of being unacceptable. It is a feeling of being inferior. It is “a wound made from the inside by an unseen hand”. There is something about “Attachment” issues and what happene...2024-10-1108 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastScapegoating can go on for only so long - folks with Sex Addiction!Send us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreScapegoating can go on for only so long. Then a need to accept responsibility for adult choices.The Kairos Centre do an extensive History Taking to build a profile understanding of the adult, impacted by childhood development issues. The feedback hypothesis can cause your brain (which initially, is not your best friend during the early stages of attempts at recovery) to blame others for what happened to you back there in the past. (We do not all...2024-10-0406 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastDon't forget the partner - in the Sex Addiction Recovery JourneySend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreHe “caused” our problems and yet once again the focus and everyone’s attention is on him. The family income is being used by him again for his benefit, on top of the spend he has already enjoyed on his addiction. It’s just not fair. I am left here with his stuff and don’t know where to go or turn for help for me. That just is not right and is not fair. I feel so.....This i...2024-09-2707 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastIt isn't all about me - this thing of Sex Addiction RecoverySend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreIf you are in a partnered relationship, re-build integrity with yourself by signing a 'Couples Recovery Plan'. Recovery - in a partnered relationship - is about the partnership, not only about your recovery at all.Your signature on the 'Couples Recovery Plan' can bolster your commitment to be faithful to your word/your signature - to use 'best endeavours' to achieve the outcomes in the Couples Recovery Plan. It can get you a long way into your...2024-09-2010 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastGive back control brain: Then I won't need porn AddictionSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreThe ability to quickly recognize fearful situations and other emotional signals, may be critical to survival, as it enables us to detect potential threats. The amygdala is believed to play a central role in these processes.The amygdala is a small, almond-shaped structure deep in the brain, located on the medial surface of the temporal lobe, which processes both positive and negative emotions. Brain scanning studies show that the amygdala is activated in response to fear, even...2024-09-1309 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastSome replacement positive self-soothing Hamster wheel tools for Sex/Porn AddictionSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreThey are called the 4 Elements tools - which I teach my EMDR ("trauma") clients. These self-soothing - much more healthy and positive impacting (but still are hamster wheel/repetitive/habit/neural pathway activities) - become the new "go-to" practices.In other words, instead of defaulting to the previous negative hamster wheel behaviours, you learn to default to these positive ones - that are used repetitively. Get it?They work. They can help you bring your...2024-09-0608 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastEnhance sobriety by knowing which "Stage(s) of change" you are at in your Sex/Porn/Love Addiction RecoverySend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreIf you understand The Stages of Change, may be you will not be so hard on yourself and be liberated! May be you are not defective, weak, a worse case, a hopeless case or an unfixable case.Stop beating yourself up, since you are facing the same Relapses as those trying to quit smoking, stop binge eating & other eating disorders, gambling, drugs, gaming and many other compulsive behaviours. You are not being weak....2024-08-3008 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastSex & Tech - Slippery slope that ends badly for those with Sex & Porn AddictionSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreI need only a few words to summary this episode. The slippery slope of mis-using Technology, will always cost you more than you had bargained, in many aspects of life.The world of AI, VR, Silicone full size sex dolls (childlike or sex slave like), will take you down at some point. It may not be for 20 years before doing a look back to count the cost of the severe adverse consequences of chasing the ultimate experience.2024-08-2311 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastPorn & Sex Addicts re-wire their brain - a little at timeSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre"Sticks & stones can break my bones, but names can never hurt me". That's not true! words do hurt. That means positive words can heal wounds.Hence, the basis for reciting "Pillars" - which are words that are spoken over yourself three times a day, every day. They can re-set you throughout the day, as a distraction technique; distraction from the objectified images which are being replayed in the minds-eye. Those objectified images...2024-08-1610 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastWhy those with Sex Addiction are willing to risk such "Harmful Consequences"Send us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreFor example, the highest download of porn is between the hours of 9am and 5pm. What are those hours? Where are most people, during those hours? What do most contracts say about being caught having downloaded such material at work? What consequences flow from exposure? Then why take that level of risk?Don't use logic when considering these questions. The part of the brain that does logic, is the Frontal Lobes - the Frontal Cortex (which analyzes...2024-08-0909 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Podcast"Objectification" is not (for Porn Addicts) about noticing the person, but about....Send us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre"Objectification" is not that you noticed the person. It is, that you linker longer or go back for a second or third look. "I am just appreciating God's creating", doesn't cut it!What a nightmare then, for Porn Addicts, are these Paris Olympics (and the holiday abroad in the sun (not in England!) - by the poolside and the beach.On the theme of the Olympics, here is a snippet of my recent article. Email...2024-08-0210 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastPorn-Blockers won't stop Porn Addiction viewing, but are essentialSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centrePorn-Blockers won't stop those who are determined to act out. Their use is, however, essential for those serious about achieving sobriety. It buys you time. It might get you through that day and enable you to add one more day to your sobriety count. Here are some Porn-Blockers:Chrome BlockX/Blocker X,Safe Surfer,Covenant Eyes,Qustodio,Famisafe Ourpast,Norton Online Family,Xblock,AdGuard,Tech LockdownPluckeye,Accountable2you,Focus.me,Antidopamine,Adultblocker,X3Watch2024-07-2608 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastPsychosexual issues set up for those with Sex, Porn, Love AddictionSend us a textSnippet of an interview with Caroline Brown of “This Crazy over 40s Life”: Sex with no strings attached - Part 5- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreWorth listening to “Sexual Intelligence: More Science stuff” episodes – to recognise that there are consequence for Sex, Porn, Love Addiction patterns of behaviours. Watch out for the psychosexual problems in the individual and couple’s sexual relationship.Sex, Porn, Love Addiction gets passed on to your next generation and tends to have a co-addiction (twin addiction) w...2024-07-1909 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastMany women (worldwide) became addicted to Sex & Porn during covid-19 lock downSend us a text(Snippets from an Interview by Caroline Brown of "This Crazy over 40's Life Podcast") - Part 4- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreSomething shifted during Covid-19 lockdown. Many women enticed to use phones, computers and tablets during lockdown, crossed their own "values" boundaries, as it seemed reasonable to do so (in the unusual circumstances of lockdown). The problem: Once crossed and their brain experienced the novelty, naughtiness, daringness and thrill of seeing a partner on the other side of the screen - went...2024-07-1209 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Podcast"Pinches & Crunches" in Relationships trigger escape into self-soothing with Sex, Porn, Love AddictionSend us a text(Snippets from an Interview by Caroline Brown of "This Crazy over 40's Life Podcast") - Part 3- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreSameness and/or difference attracts and are bonded together; but something shifted somewhere along the journey. Falling out of love visited the couple,Something about Core Emotional Needs being met, then stopped being met. Also, how it is we trash out Values and become unshackled. Core Emotional Needs and (separately) Values, are two powerful exercises covered in The Kairos...2024-07-0509 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastCouples Counselling at the right stage in the Sex, Porn, Love Addiction Recovery journeySend us a text(Interviewed by Caroline Brown of This Crazy over 40's Life Podcast) - Part 2- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreNavigating life is challenging. Navigating partnered/couple relationship is even more challenging. Add Sex, Porn, Love Addiction to the mix - when you are still trying to understand self.What are the things hindering you from being the best that you can be. Sex, Porn, Love Addiction is the self-soother escape and avoidance and so that isn't it - alone!...2024-06-2810 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastA female client’s "Goodbye letter" to Porn, Sex (or was it more love Addiction)Send us a text(Interviewed by Caroline Brown of This Crazy over 40's Life Podcast) - Part 1- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreYou can break free of the (perhaps) generational baton of inherited compulsive behaviours and decide - "it stops with me" Here is one such past Kairos Centre client's description of her journey:"A client’s Goodbye letter to porn, sex & love Addiction A goodbye to sex and love addiction letter, written by a woman after 9 months therapy with Gar...2024-06-2108 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastSociety has a view about those identified with Sex, Porn, Love addiction - which mostly is not accurateSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreInterview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (10)What do you want from Therapy? Where does your view come from? Is it your view or a “hand me down”? Therapy won’t work until you are ready. But if you take too long (as the masses do), then the hand grenade may go off in your face and then you are left picking up shrapnel. Picking up shrapnel is to be re-act...2024-06-1412 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastSex, Porn, Love Addiction individuals have enough self-given labels on their forehead without needing extras from societySend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreInterview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (9)Take your eyes off others and do your own battles and fights….then, after sorting self, maybe you will have more energy to pick up other things and fulfil your best potential in that area, as you become the best that you can be and leave your positive deposit on this earth. The Kairos Centre is all about helping you...2024-06-0706 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastSex, Porn, Love Addiction keeps you in a loop - with unresolved past (t)(T)raumaSend us a text- On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreInterview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (8)"What! I no longer need to do traditional 'Talk Therapy', to address my past impactful stuff of life? Tell me more!"Call it a little “t” trauma – that I cannot even see in my lovely family upbringing or big "T". Trauma isn’t only what happens in the Middle East or Afghanistan. It can be the 6 years old whose action man was take...2024-05-3109 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastThose with Sex, Porn, Love Addiction patterns of behaviour do not love or like themselvesSend us a textInterview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (7)“Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who is the fairest or them all”? How do you answer that question for you? Learn to love self, before you can love others.I use that thing called EMDR to work on the distorted image of self. (I am an Accredited EMDR Practitioner in the UK). What is this thing called EMDR? It is Eye Movement Desensitisation Reprocessing. What a mouth full!I can talk about...2024-05-2409 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastTemplates get set up in early life, setting the stage for self-soothing & later on Sex, Porn, Love Addiction enters the stageSend us a textOn-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centreInterview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (6)Have I said this already - "Childhood has a lot to answer"?Maybe just a few times hey! But are you getting it? Don't start at step 5 or 6 with a Recovery Programme or 12 Steps Support. They are absolutely needed, but not yet. Go back to first base. Step 1. Childhood developmental years.Can't find anything there? You had a lovely upbringing...2024-05-1710 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastChildhood development holds the clues to tracking the setting up of Sex, Porn, Love AddictionSend us a textInterview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (5)What’s a “Russian Doll” (or is it called a Babushka) got to do with Sex, Porn, Love Addiction?I thought you would never ask!“I haven’t bought into that nonsense “Big boys don’t cry”, when I was growing up”. At least, I don’t think so”!That guy called John Bowlby in the 1940’s dared to put together some suppositions that I didn’t like. How dare he...2024-05-1009 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastCoping Mechanisms unveiled: Exploring the Role of Sex, Porn, Love Compulsive behaviourSend us a textInterview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (4)Men are “Wild at heart”. The book (by that title) by John Eldredge – maybe is on to something. (Worth a read guys - and gals).Where there are some things that were not done “good enough” during childhood development, the brain then sets about trying to fill the deficits. Sometimes with coping strategies, such that Sex, Porn and/or Love Compulsive activities enter the mix, after the game console or sports, ain’t doing it well enough. ...2024-05-0307 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastSex, Porn, Love Addiction is indiscriminate between Masculinity & Femininity, but women tend....Send us a textInterview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (3)Big up the womenSo much more practical in finding solutions. Teach us please ladies. We need you. Us men have become emasculated by a society. What does masculinity mean? Aren’t there two roles – Masculinity & Femininity? Aren’t they different? Don’t they complement each other, to create a balanced society? Too simplistic Gary?We need someone in our life to role-model the sexual type that belongs to each of us. Witho...2024-04-2609 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastOpportunity, Trauma & Attachment: Three ways Sex, Porn, Love Addiction are set upSend us a textInterview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (2)Impediments to having great relationships Disruption in the bonding in early childhood development with the significant caregivers (usually parents), is a key factor. The male (a father) plays a very important role. Masculinity cannot be supplemented by a mother. It is not "do as I say", it is "do as you see me doing". The eyes take in the largest amount of information during the communication process.What gets set up in childhood, p...2024-04-1910 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastNot a level playing field for the setting up of Sex, Porn, Love CompulsivitySend us a textInterview by Damian Andrews of SHAIR.care: What it means to be a man (1)What is Man-ness?There is still a caveman instinct inside of us as men. Has the image got distorted as men try to metamorphize ourselves to fit what society tells us a man should be. Trying to fit what we are really not, is hard work. At some point there may be an increased desire to self-soothe and escape into cyberworld for a while – using sex, porn and/or other compulsive behaviours. Consider this poem:...2024-04-1209 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastDeal with trauma before a Sex, Porn, Love Addiction Recovery ProgrammeSend us a textInterview with Roman Mironov of NOFAP (4)Root causes of negative impact on the brain, to cause it to gravitate to self-soothing behaviours?What do you think were the issues which caused your brain to gravitate to self-soothing from those negative impactful behaviours, during those early developing younger years of life (often before puberty)? Bullying, abuse, sexual abuse, parents arguing, witnessing domestic violence, over zealous punishment, comparison with a sibling, never good enough, not fit in, ostracised, parents’ separation and/or divorce, pressure to perform at school, witnessing assaults, fear fo...2024-04-0507 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastPorn use can cause Brain damageSend us a textInterview with Roman Mironov of NOFAP (3)Is porn bad or inherently bad for the brain?I don’t want to be seen as moralising about anyone’s personal values, ethics, standards or morals. What we do know is that experiments demonstrate that porn viewing can do permanent damage to the brain. (We are dealing with lots of porn use over lots of hours; no short periodical or ad hoc use).Once damaged in that way, it is permanent and the deficit cannot be repaired. (“A bit scaremongery Gary”...2024-03-2208 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastStand up the real you - when Sex & Porn addiction behaviours beckonSend us a textInterview with Roman Mironov of NOFAP (2)This Insecure Attachment thing, has a lot to answer…..Stuff set up in childhood development, has its tentacles in how we are doing our adult lives and relationships. Picture the image of a “Russian Doll”; the layers of the Russian Doll has the smallest version deep inside. That represents the Inner child. Stand up the real you. Which one will stand up? Which one is the real you?The Inner child is deep in the layers seeking protection from ever getting hurt a...2024-03-1508 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastTrue Sex, Porn, Love Addiction sobriety is not until one year from last Acting out! DiscussSend us a textInterview with Roman Mironov of NOFAP (1)Don't think about having truly achieved sobriety until one year from the last acting out.“A bit arbitrary Gary. Rather too long, don’t you think?” My reply is that the compulsive and addiction behaviours usually have a few decades start on you. In other words, many clients have been doing the behaviours for decades – often since childhood development. A habit; a hamster wheel behaviour pattern; otherwise more therapeutically called a neural pathway - is well established. It is not going to be pos...2024-03-0810 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastWe all need a helping hand in life at some point: Sex, Porn, Love Addiction behaviours needs helpSend us a textInterview with Marci Warhaft of "How to ruin your own reputation" Podcast (5)Getting help is not a sign of weakness.Repeated Negative patterns of behaviours, give a glimpse of a problem. I take me into the relationship and is me being me, doing life how I do life – “What’s the problem?”; the problem must be you.There is no problem if there is no problem; but when you know there is a problem – because life just is not working well for you - then you need to lift yo...2024-03-0109 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastI'm worse than others when it comes to Porn recovery: True or False?Send us a textInterview with Marci Warhaft of "How to ruin your own reputation" Podcast (4)You are not weaker and less robust than others. It is a lie.The behaviours are all about managing emotions, in response to issues in the past - still operating the same way in the present. Once repeat behaviours set in, you are on the hamster wheel and it is difficult to get off. What’s all this got to do with a 6 years old whose Action man or Barbie doll was stolen by the boy...2024-02-2309 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastHighest download of porn is during office hours: That's crazy!Send us a textInterview with Marci Warhaft of "How to ruin your own reputation" Podcast (3)Seriously!!The highest download of porn during the day is between the hours of 9am and 5pm. (Let me spell it out -- OFFICE HOURS!)“That’s crazy!” Not so crazy for some. The brain has decided that the “Feeling-state” that it gets from the behaviour ie the lushness, is worth the massively high risk and trade-off. As human-beings, we tend to push the boundaries too far and a hand grenade explodes, leaving us fire-fighting and pickin...2024-02-1609 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastInterview with Marci Warhaft of "How to ruin your own reputation" Podcast (2)Send us a textMore about this thing called “Love Addiction”. What is it? What it is not.“Push you Pull me” is at work. “I want you, I love you…..but you're getting too close; you might finish with me, so I am getting jittery and so I am going to push you away, so I force us to end, so you don’t finish with me when I was not expecting it; that must never happen and catch me off guard”.Here is my definition of Sex Addiction which I use: "A patter...2024-02-0909 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastInterview with Marci Warhaft of "How to ruin your own reputation" Podcast (1)Send us a textDefining the difference between Sex addiction & Love addiction:Love addiction is all about trying to getting attention and a sense of feeling wanted, even if the attention is being paid for – since any attention is better than no attention. It has its roots in childhood development causing Insecure Attachment; a sense of rejection and loss – due to a disruption in the early years bonding with key parental figures.So, there is a searching out, using such activities as dating sites, chat sites, web cam interaction and other methods of inte...2024-02-0209 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastWomen with 10 plus, lifetime sexual partners have 91% higher risk of breast cancerSend us a textSexual Intelligence: More science stuff (6)Enough now - of this science stuff! Ok then, this is the last one - for now.Delayed childbearing and fewer pregnancies raise the risk of developing breast cancer in women. We are seeing 100% increase in the rates of breast cancer right now. Much more than in the past. Why?A female who has her first child by age 20, has half the chance of developing breast cancer, as opposed to a woman who has her first child at around age 30. At the...2024-01-1905 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastEarly sexual arousal rate will influence later addiction to pornSend us a textSexual Intelligence: More science stuff (5)Let's focus on women - in this Episode: What females need to know about themselves: Early sexual arousal rate will influence later addiction to porn. Females are more vulnerable to succumbing to sex addiction where they experienced frequent sexual arousal at an early age.Alcohol consumption raises both sexes testosterone levels up to a point; but testosterone levels increase much more in females, with alcohol consumption. Females can then do out of character behaviours and become a very different person when they h...2024-01-1208 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastMales over perceive a woman's sexual interest, when in fact she is just being niceSend us a textSexual Intelligence: More science stuff (4)Got to admit, this science stuff is interesting - if it is true!There are three areas in the male brain that is over twice the size of the female brain:1) The area that contributes to men having a roving eye and scanning the terrain for females; 2) A part of the hypothalamus (which is the seat of human sexuality); 3) The amygdala (which is the brain’s command and control area). All three react to testosterone - which is much higher in males than in...2024-01-0506 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastMen see promiscuity in a female as a deal breaker when seeking a life-long partnerSend us a textSexual Intelligence: More science stuff (3)A lot of compact info in this episode. I think my post bag is going to be very full this week with comments about.......!Remember, don't shoot the messenger.Men see promiscuity in a female as a deal breaker when seeking a life-long partner. If a man sees a woman as hard to get for sex, he will instinctively feel that she will more likely be faithful in the long term for partnership/marriage. For males, sexual loyalty and sexual integrity is...2023-12-2906 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastThe younger a female experiences arousal, the greater the number of casual sex partnersSend us a textSexual Intelligence: More science stuff (2)In all your getting, get understanding. What you can better understand, you have then moved it from the unconscious into the conscious. From the unseen, into the seen. Now you get a chance to go after it and effect change. It can never be the same again, because you know what you are doing! Get it?Remember, don't shoot the messenger.Sitting comfortably? Braced? Here we go then:Research in 2006 show that the younger the age that a females experiences...2023-12-2206 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastAround aged 17, six times the number of males become addicted to porn than young femalesSend us a textSexual Intelligence: Know the science stuffOh - yuk! Must we?Well - not preaching to you, but knowing the science done by some very clever people, will help you. Remember what this thing called Therapy is about - certainly Therapy from The Kairos Centre; all about moving as much from the unconscious, into the conscious - then you get a chance to go after what you can now better see and understand - in order to effect change. Get it!Here it go; and don't shoot...2023-12-1606 minThe Sex, Porn & Love Addiction PodcastRelapse prevention: There should be signs of a reclaimed quality life from Sex, Porn, Love Addiction, without shame and with added colourSend us a textYou need to keep your guards up. The stuff (which is now in your past), will keep trying to trip you up. You need to apply effort in order to maintain the hard earned and carved out gains; but gains there are; very tangible; very real.You did it. Not a programme. You did it. I could lead the horse to water, but as a facilitator, I could not make it drink. (By the way, I wasn't calling you a horse)! When you drink; when you drank; you made incremental steps...2022-07-1210 min