Shows
Better Sex308: [Soapbox} Preset limits are as unhelpful as expectationsIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist, Jessa Zimmerman, discusses the concept of reactive desire, where individuals may not initially feel in the mood for sex but can become aroused through the process. She emphasizes the importance of entering intimate situations with an open, flexible mindset without predefined expectations, allowing for the possibility of reactive desire to manifest. Jessa advises against making upfront decisions about the sexual outcome and advocates for focusing on pleasure and connection. She also highlights the significance of mutual flexibility between partners to enhance intimate experiences. Listeners are encouraged to...2025-07-2406 minBetter Sex306: [Soapbox] Address your emotional connection firstIn this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman discusses the importance of addressing and repairing intimacy and connection in a relationship before focusing on improving one's sex life. She talks about the common issues couples face when there are differences in libido and how these can lead to emotional disconnection. Jessa emphasizes the need for open, heartfelt communication, positive focus, gratitude, and fun in restoring emotional closeness. She also covers how to understand desire discrepancy, the sexual avoidance cycle, and the common mistakes higher desire partners make. The episode concludes with strategies for preparing and engaging...2025-07-1711 minBetter Sex304: [Soapbox] Sex not worth havingIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses a common issue faced by couples: the lower desire partner consistently having sex to meet their partner’s needs, leading to resentment. Jessa shares insights from a recent coaching session where a woman expressed deep frustration from decades of unfulfilling sexual encounters with her husband. Jessa emphasizes the need for both partners to realize their role in co-creating this dynamic and offers strategies for transforming their intimate relationship into one that is mutually fulfilling, rather than obligatory. She urges lower desire partners to focus on...2025-07-1009 minBetter Sex302: [Soapbox] Desire is not the same as attractionIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the often misunderstood distinction between desire and attraction in intimate relationships. Zimmerman explains how many people confuse a decrease in spontaneous desire with a loss of attraction toward their partner. She details how desire can shift from proactive to reactive, particularly as relationships evolve, with age, stress, and familiarity. Listeners will gain insight into maintaining a healthy sex life by adapting to these changes instead of misconstruing them as a loss of attraction. Finally, she emphasizes the importance of deepening connections beyond physical appearances...2025-07-0309 minBetter Sex300: [Soapbox] The power of positivity in improving your sex lifeIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman delves into the power of positivity and its impact on sexual relationships. Discussing common struggles faced by couples, Jessa emphasizes the importance of shifting focus from negative feelings to cultivating hope and enthusiasm. She shares her own journey into sex therapy and provides expert advice on making sex a joyful and light-hearted part of life. Jess encourages listeners to envision a future where sex is easy, natural, and fun, and offers resources through her platform 'Intimacy with Ease' to help achieve this transformation.2025-06-2609 minBetter Sex299: Men, Infidelity, & Disenfranchised Grief with Dr. Elliott KronenfeldIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman delves into the intricacies of infidelity recovery with Dr. Elliott Kronenfeld. They discuss the complex emotions and traumas associated with infidelity, the process of rebuilding trust and security, and how couples can address the underlying issues that lead to cheating. Dr. Kronenfeld also introduces his books, 'Couples by Intention' and 'Unspoken Loss: Men, Infidelity, and Disenfranchised Grief,' which offer further insights into intentional relationships and infidelity recovery. The conversation deepens the understanding of trust, forgiveness, and the need for both partners to address their personal wounds in the path...2025-06-2346 minBetter Sex298: [Soapbox] You and your partner may start with different goalsIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman discusses the different challenges faced by partners with differing levels of sexual desire. She explains the emotional impact on both higher and lower desire individuals and highlights the common feelings of rejection, guilt, frustration, and resentment. Zimmerman emphasizes the importance of helping couples understand each other’s experiences and working towards a shared vision of enjoyable and natural sexual intimacy. She also invites listeners to seek further help through her courses and therapy sessions.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex00:56 Understanding Desire Discrepancies...2025-06-1909 minBetter Sex297: Revitalizing your sex life when you have young kids with Lauren DitzianIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman discusses how parents can maintain a thriving sex life despite the challenges of raising young kids. Joined by special guest Lauren Ditzian, a couples and sex therapist, they explore common issues such as desire discrepancy, feeling touched-out, and managing resentment. They also offer practical advice on communication strategies, redefining sex, and prioritizing intimacy amidst the chaos of parenting.00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview01:06 Guest Introduction: Lauren Ditzian01:42 Lauren's Journey Into Sex Therapy for Parents06:50 Common Challenges for Parents' Sex Lives2025-06-1626 minBetter Sex296: [Personal Story] Our six year drought is overIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman welcomes a former student who shares his personal journey of overcoming years of intimacy struggles in his marriage. The guest recounts how early retirement and his wife's menopause led to a five-year period of no sexual contact, deteriorating communication, and his eventual realization of the depth of his wife's unhappiness. He discusses the transformative impact of joining Jess’s program, which guided him to listen actively, practice mindfulness, and change his behavior. The episode provides a heartfelt exploration of how vulnerability, patience, and open-hearted communication ca...2025-06-1249 minBetter Sex295: Erectile Dysfunction with Dr. Anne TruongIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman and guest Dr. Anne discuss the prevalence of erectile dysfunction (ED), its underlying causes, and various treatment strategies. They explore how lifestyle changes, such as diet and exercise, can significantly improve sexual health and why it's crucial to address the root causes of ED rather than just the symptoms. Dr. Anne shares her expertise on innovative treatments like stem cell therapy, shockwave therapy, and the use of Botox to enhance erectile function. This episode provides valuable insights for men and women alike on maintaining and improving sexual health.2025-06-0937 minBetter Sex294: Soapbox - Who is ready to transform their sex lifeJoin sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman in this episode of the Better Sex Podcast as she explores how otherwise happy couples can transform their sex lives. With 15 years of experience and working with over a thousand couples, Jessa shares insights on the importance of addressing sex and intimacy issues, understanding desire discrepancies, and removing the societal expectations that can hinder sexual satisfaction. She emphasizes the significance of mutual respect and love between partners, sharing practical advice and strategies for creating a fun, easy, and enjoyable sex life. Listeners are encouraged to embrace a new perspective on sex and use helpful...2025-06-0509 minBetter Sex293: Men, Sex, and Vulnerability with Dr. Paul AbramowitzIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes back Dr. Paul Abramowitz for a deep dive into vulnerability in men and its impact on their intimate relationships. They explore the different stages of male development and how vulnerability manifests, the importance of understanding and embracing this vulnerability, and strategies to enhance intimacy and connection. The discussion covers biological and psychological aspects, the role of pornography, and practical steps for couples to foster deeper connections. Key insights from notable experts like Brene Brown and Peggy Klein Platz are also highlighted.00:00 Introduction...2025-06-021h 00Better Sex292: [Soapbox] Don't believe everything you thinkIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman dives into the concept of questioning our thoughts, which she argues is crucial for enhancing intimate relationships. Using the acronym CT FAR (Circumstances, Thoughts, Feelings, Actions, Results), Zimmerman explains how our automatic thought processes affect our emotions, behaviors, and outcomes. She provides practical examples, like interpreting someone's actions in traffic or a partner's habits at home, to illustrate her points. Zimmerman emphasizes that our thoughts are often shaped by life experiences and unconscious training, making it pivotal to question their validity. She also explores the concept of perception...2025-05-2916 minBetter Sex291: Misconceptions about HRT with Dr. Kelly CaspersonIn this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman chats with urologist and women's sexual health advocate Dr. Kelly Casperson. They delve into the myths and fears surrounding hormone replacement therapy (HRT), particularly focusing on menopause and its implications. Dr. Casperson explains why many common concerns, such as the belief that HRT causes breast cancer, are unfounded. She also emphasizes the importance of individualized care, informed consent, and the numerous benefits of hormone therapy, including improved sexual function, mood, and overall quality of life. The conversation covers bioidentical hormones, testosterone for women, and the often overlooked role...2025-05-2644 minBetter Sex290: [Soapbox] Women Writing EroticaIn this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman delves into the topic of eroticism and the empowering act of writing one's own erotica. She discusses how writing personal erotic stories can help individuals explore their fantasies, reclaim power, and ignite their arousal. Jessa also introduces her new project, Women Writing Erotica, a community for women to share and discuss their writings in a safe and supportive environment.00:00 Introduction00:45 Exploring Eroticism Through Writing01:42 Benefits of Writing Erotica03:46 Jess' New Project: Women Writing Erotica05:57 Conclusion2025-05-2207 minBetter Sex289: Navigating Faith Transition as a Couple with Jeremiah Gibson and Julia PostemaIn this episode of the Better Sex podcast, host sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses faith transitions and the impact on intimate relationships with guests Jeremiah Gibson and Julia Postema, co-hosts of the Sex Evangelicals podcast and founders of an international coaching business. They delve into deconstructing purity culture, gender roles, and high-control religions, sharing personal stories and professional insights. They emphasize the importance of communication, managing stress, and supporting each other through deconstruction processes. The episode offers valuable strategies for individuals and couples coping with these complex dynamics.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast2025-05-1943 minBetter Sex288: Soapbox - Exploring EroticismIn this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman delves into the fun and crucial topic of eroticism. Building on her previous discussion of nine competencies necessary for a great sex life, Jessa focuses specifically on the ninth competency: exploring what truly turns you and your partner on. She defines eroticism as more than just physical acts but the subtleties and energies that arouse us. Jessa provides strategies to identify and discuss erotic preferences with your partner, encouraging a shame-free and understanding conversation. She emphasizes the importance of finding overlap in erotic preferences to...2025-05-1511 minBetter Sex287: Freedom from Body Shame with Nikita FernandesIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman discusses body acceptance, freedom from body shame, and the broader implications on sexual intimacy and pleasure with guest sex therapist Nikita Fernandes. They explore the sources and impacts of body shame, the unique challenges faced by diverse communities, and practical steps towards body acceptance and empowerment.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex00:46 Jessa's Intro on Body Shame01:52 Nikita's Background and Motivation04:32 Populations and Approaches in Therapy06:39 Low Sexual Self-Esteem and Intimacy Issues10:47 Sources of Body Shame2025-05-1230 minBetter Sex286: [Soapbox] Sex is so much more than just a physical releaseIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the significance of sex in intimate relationships. Addressing the common concern from lower desire partners who often feel misunderstood or inadequate, Jessa delves into why sex is more than just a physical act—it is a profound emotional connection. She explains how openness and vulnerability during sex create a unique bond between partners. By exploring these dynamics, Jessa offers insights and strategies for both lower and higher desire partners to improve their intimate relationships. The episode encourages open communication and understanding, highlighting the multidimensional nature of...2025-05-0809 minBetter Sex285: Sexual Empowerment with Ann RussoIn this episode of the Better Sex podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman interviews Ann Russo, an expert on sexual empowerment. They discuss the concept of sexual empowerment, its importance for individuals across different sexual orientations and gender identities, and the benefits and barriers to achieving it. Ann shares insights from her work and personal experiences, exploring how societal and cultural messages, particularly around religion and female sexuality, contribute to disempowerment. They also discuss how people can begin to unlearn harmful messages and reclaim their pleasure and sexual identity. Throughout the conversation, they touch on topics such as trauma, marginalized communities...2025-05-0530 minBetter Sex284: [Soapbox} Are you entitled to sexIn this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman addresses the complex question of whether individuals are entitled to sex within their relationships. She explores both sides of the argument, emphasizing the importance of mutual satisfaction and highlighting the pitfalls of entitlement. Jessa underscores the significance of a fulfilling sex life for both partners and the need for self-reflection and teamwork. The episode also discusses common misconceptions and harmful attitudes towards sex and provides strategies for creating a balanced, enjoyable, and sustainable intimate relationship.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex00:51 The Entitlement...2025-05-0109 minBetter Sex283: Peak Pleasure- How to Achieve Flow in the Bedroom with Dr. Emily JameaIn this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman speaks with couples and sex therapist Dr. Emily Jamea about her new book, 'Anatomy of Desire: Five Secrets to Create Connection and Cultivate Passion.' They discuss the concept of achieving a flow state during sex, which involves being so fully absorbed in the moment that time seems to disappear and there's a profound connection with one's partner. Emily shares insights from her research, including the importance of curiosity, adapting to life's challenges, and maintaining emotional intimacy. She also emphasizes that this state is accessible to everyone, regardless...2025-04-2828 minBetter Sex282: [Soapbox] The plight of the lower desire partnerIn this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the challenges faced by the lower desire partner in a relationship. She addresses the common issue of desire discrepancy and emphasizes the importance of empathy and understanding. Jessa shares insights from her work with clients and highlights the guilt and feeling of brokenness that often accompany lower desire. By changing the conversation and creating a safe space, couples can co-create a better sexual relationship. Real-life feedback from her Intimacy With Ease program illustrates the positive impact of this approach.00:00...2025-04-2411 minBetter Sex281: Permanent Sexual Side Effects from Commonly Prescribed Medications with Dr. Irwin GoldsteinIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host sex therapist, Jessa Zimmerman, engages in a thought-provoking conversation with Dr. Irwin Goldstein from the San Diego Sexual Medicine Clinic. They discuss the often overlooked and lasting sexual side effects of widely prescribed medications, including birth control pills, SSRIs, and finasteride (Propecia). Dr. Goldstein explains the mechanisms by which these medications impact sexual health and shares research findings and patient experiences. Listeners are informed about the importance of recognizing these side effects and considering alternative treatments where possible.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast00:46...2025-04-2130 minBetter Sex280: [Soapbox] Using the Giver Receiver Exercise for GrowthIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses how to use the giver receiver exercise for personal and relational growth. Jessa provides detailed insights on recognizing personal progress, identifying challenges, and reflecting on experiences to foster meaningful breakthroughs in intimate relationships. The episode offers guidance both for the receiver and the giver in the exercise, emphasizing the importance of communication, self-awareness, and practice. Listeners are encouraged to use the exercise repetitively for continuous improvement and transformation.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex00:49 Overview of the Giver Receiver Exercise2025-04-1717 minBetter Sex279: Kink, BDSM, and Mental Health with AJ CheyfitzIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman interviews AJ Cheyfitz about kink and BDSM, discussing misconceptions, mental health, and trauma-related aspects. They explore how individuals can safely engage in kink, the importance of negotiation, identifying red flags, and how to find kink-aware therapists. The conversation emphasizes destigmatizing kink and ensuring a supportive environment for those exploring or involved in BDSM.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast00:59 Exploring Kink and BDSM with AJ Schitz01:56 Mental Health and Kink: Navigating Stigma06:55 Understanding Kink: Myths and Realities09:16 Defining...2025-04-1434 minBetter Sex278: [Soapbox] Go to the playgroundIn this 'soapbox' episode of Better Sex, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the concept of transforming sexual encounters into playful, pressure-free experiences akin to visiting a playground. Highlighting the pitfalls of goal-oriented sex, Zimmerman suggests focusing more on pleasure and connection rather than specific outcomes. She provides strategies for reducing pressure and creating a more flexible, enjoyable intimate relationship. Listeners are encouraged to embrace this approach, which can enhance spontaneous and satisfying sexual experiences.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex00:56 The Playground Concept in Sex01:55 Removing Pressure and Embracing Pleasure04:31...2025-04-1009 minBetter Sex277: Pole dancing and sexual expression with Elle Hamilton WohlIn this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman converses with Elle Hamilton Wohl about the multifaceted benefits of pole dancing. Wohl details how this practice serves as a powerful means of embodying sensual movement, aiding in sexuality, trauma recovery, pleasure, awareness, and body acceptance. They explore the therapeutic potential of pole dancing, how it integrates physical fitness with mental health, and its ability to connect individuals to their sensuality. Wohl also shares her personal journey into pole dancing and its transformative impact while offering insights into how listeners can seek suitable classes fitting their...2025-04-0722 minBetter Sex276: [Soapbox] The most powerful exercise for changeIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the importance of experiential practice in improving intimate relationships. She introduces the Giver-Receiver Exercise, a powerful tool from her sex therapy practice and online course, 'Intimacy with Ease.' She explains how this exercise integrates nine essential skills for a thriving sex life, such as prioritizing intimacy, learning to communicate about sex, and practicing mindfulness. Listeners are guided through the instructions of the exercise and its benefits. She also shares the origins of the practice and emphasizes the importance of practicing regularly for long-lasting...2025-04-0319 minBetter Sex275: Potential Negatives from Hormonal Birth Control with Mia NeusteinIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman delves deep into the topic of hormonal birth control with nurse practitioner Mia Neustein from San Diego Sexual Medicine. The discussion covers various forms of hormonal and non-hormonal birth control, their side effects, and the specific impact of hormonal birth control on sexual health. Mia explains the vestibule, its role in sexual functioning, and how hormonal birth control can sometimes cause pain, itching, and burning during sex. The episode also explores the importance of testosterone in women's bodies, how hormonal birth control can affect these levels, and the...2025-03-3142 minBetter Sex274: [Soapbox] 9 skills to master for great sex.mp3In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses nine essential competencies for creating and maintaining a great sex life. Jessa emphasizes the importance of prioritizing intimacy, effective communication about sex, accessing desire, enjoying the journey, being present, celebrating 'no,' balancing being selfish and giving, and exploring eroticism. These competencies focus on internal mindsets and skills rather than physical techniques. She also emphasizes the need for practice and understanding one's and their partner's erotic preferences for a fulfilling intimate relationship.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex00:58 The Competencies for...2025-03-2720 minBetter Sex273: People Pleasing Does Not Help Sex with Bea AlbinaIn this episode of Better Sex, host sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman talks with Bea Albina about 'emotional outsourcing' - a concept she coined to describe chronic people-pleasing and codependency. Bea shares her personal journey of detachment from her body and how she transitioned to a more joyful and authentic life. They discuss the overlap between people-pleasing and codependency, how these behaviors manifest, and their impact on intimate relationships and sex. Bea offers practical advice on reconnecting with one’s body, establishing healthy boundaries, and reducing resentment in relationships. She also introduces techniques to calm the nervous system and the im...2025-03-2431 minBetter Sex272: [Soapbox] Escapting the sexual avoidance cycleIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman delves into the sexual avoidance cycle, a term she coined to describe a common issue in intimate relationships. She explains how negative experiences and unmet expectations lead to avoidance, creating a cycle of increasing pressure and anxiety around sex. Jessa discusses various factors that contribute to this cycle, such as personal insecurities, relationship conflicts, and external life stressors. She emphasizes the importance of challenging unrealistic expectations, addressing negative feelings, and communicating openly with one's partner to break free from this cycle and enhance intimate relationships.2025-03-2011 minBetter Sex271: Men Hardwired by nature and Evolving by choice with Paul AbramowitzIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman talks with Paul Abramowitz, author of 'Sexed: Hardwired by Nature, Evolving by Choice,' about the intrinsic preoccupation men have with sex due to biological hardwiring. They discuss how this drive impacts men's lives and relationships, the importance of understanding and managing it, and the potential benefits of reflective engagement. Abramowitz shares insights from his book on men’s reproductive biological intelligence, the socio-cultural and biological aspects affecting men's and women's sexual behaviors, and the concept of 'intoxicated masculinity.' They also explore the implications of such understanding fo...2025-03-1747 minBetter Sex270: Soapbox: Reactive DesireIn this solo episode of the Better Sex Podcast, hosted by sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman, the spotlight is on the two distinct types of sexual desire—proactive and reactive. Zimmerman explains how proactive desire involves thinking about sex and feeling aroused independently, while reactive desire requires specific conditions and stimuli to become aroused. She discusses the common misconceptions surrounding these types of desire, their impact on relationships, and offers strategies to accommodate and embrace reactive desire. By understanding and working with these concepts, couples can enhance intimacy and reduce desire discrepancies in their relationships.00:00 In...2025-03-1312 minBetter Sex269: Overcoming Anxiety in Sex with Paula LeechIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman is joined by Paula Leech, a therapist and author who returns to discuss her book on overcoming anxiety in sex and relationships. The conversation delves into how anxiety manifests in intimate settings, including performance anxiety, body image issues, and past traumas. Leech explains the importance of understanding and interacting with one's anxiety, offering actionable steps for fostering a healthier mindset, relaxing the body, and improving intimate connections with partners.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast00:44 Guest Introduction: Paula Leech on Anxiety in...2025-03-1033 minBetter Sex268: Soapbox Episode - Desire discrepancy pitfallsNavigating Desire Discrepancy: Common Traps and SolutionsIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the universal issue of desire discrepancy in intimate relationships. Jessa explains the frequent traps and mistakes made by both higher and lower desire partners, which often exacerbate the problem. She emphasizes the importance of understanding and addressing these pitfalls with compassion and offers strategies to improve communication and intimacy. The episode aims to provide listeners with hope and practical advice for navigating their differences in libido.00:00 Introduction to Better...2025-03-0613 minBetter Sex267: Keys to Pleasure with Susan Morgan TaylorJoin host Jessa Zimmerman on the Better Sex Podcast as she interviews sex therapist Susan Morgan Taylor. They discuss the concept of blocks to pleasure and how different types of tension—mental, emotional, and physical—can impede sexual satisfaction and connection. Susan shares her personal journey from a sexless marriage to becoming a sex therapist dedicated to helping others experience their full sexual potential. They explore strategies for overcoming these blockers, including relaxation, presence, and awareness, and discuss the importance of redefining sex beyond goal-oriented outcomes. They also touch on societal myths, particularly around female sexuality, and the importance of a...2025-03-0327 minBetter Sex266: Soapbox Episode: Desire Discrepancy 101In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the nature of desire discrepancy in intimate relationships. She explains what desire discrepancy is, how it can emerge over time in all couples, and its universal nature. Jessa highlights the relative and situational aspects of discrepancy, emphasizing that roles of higher desire (HDP) and lower desire persons (LDP) can change. She also delves into the inherent control and pressure dynamics in such situations, and how they affect self-worth, relationship tension, and the meaning of sex. Future episodes will address common traps and strategies to...2025-02-2711 minBetter Sex264: The HSDD diagnosis pisses me off - soapbox episodeIn this episode of the BetterSex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the concept of hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD). Jessa delves into why she believes HSDD should not be classified as a disorder, arguing that a lack of sexual desire is influenced by various legitimate obstacles such as trauma, body image issues, relationship struggles, and larger life concerns. She explains the distinction between proactive and reactive desire, emphasizing that reactive desire is a common and normal experience. Jessa rejects the notion that low sexual desire is a pathological condition and offers resources for those navigating desire...2025-02-1908 minBetter Sex263: Menopause Before and After with Susan GoldsteinIn this episode of the Better Sex podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman interviews Susan Goldstein, a sexuality educator at the San Diego Sexual Medicine Clinic. The conversation delves into the intricacies of menopause, including personal stories and the experiences of patients. Goldstein emphasizes the benefits of monitored hormone replacement therapy and dispels myths surrounding menopause and hormone treatments. She addresses common symptoms, the importance of a tailored medical approach, and the need for informed decision-making. The episode underscores the significance of understanding one's body and seeking appropriate medical care for menopause-related issues.00:00 Welcome to Better...2025-02-1736 minBetter Sex262: Normalizing Kink with Emma Xin VelickyIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman interviews Emma Xin Velicky about how to explore fantasies and kink interests within a loving relationship. Emma shares her personal journey to kink, discusses defining kink and BDSM, and offers advice on communicating and exploring these interests with a partner. They delve into the importance of vulnerability, play, and the benefits of understanding one's erotic interests both individually and with a partner. The conversation also touches on common misconceptions about kink, the role of roleplay, and Emma's company, Saturday Box, which helps couples explore their kinky side through...2025-02-1033 minBetter Sex260: Benefits of Reading Erotica with Avalon LustIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman discusses the impact of written erotica on mental stimulation and sexual desire with her guest, erotic author Avalon Lust. Avalon shares her journey from writing romance to focusing on erotica, and how it helped rejuvenate her own libido. They explore the benefits of erotica for individuals and couples, including mental visualization, tapping into fantasies, and offering quick yet engaging reads. Avalon also provides insights on where to find quality erotica and her process of creating stories that cater to different fantasies. The episode offers valuable advice for anyone...2025-01-2719 minBetter Sex259: Somatic Approaches to Anxiety During Sex with Indigo Stray CongerIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman interviews sex therapist Indigo Stray Conger about the impacts of anxiety on sexual experiences. They delve into the common sexual concerns clients bring, such as libido discrepancies, erection issues, and orgasm control, and explore how anxiety can exacerbate these problems. Indigo shares her expertise on using somatic, body-based approaches to manage and alleviate anxiety, emphasizing the importance of breathwork, mindfulness, and creating awareness of subtle pleasure cues. The discussion also touches on the significance of sexual health for overall well-being, the cultural taboos surrounding conversations about sex, and...2025-01-2027 minBetter Sex258: Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder with Dr. Irwin GoldsteinIn this episode of Better Sex with host Jessa Zimmerman, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman interviews Dr. Irwin Goldstein to discuss Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder (PGAD). They explore the history, symptoms, and numerous potential causes of PGAD, ranging from physiological to neurological issues. They also delve into various diagnostic methods and treatment options available for managing this often misunderstood and debilitating condition.00:00 Introduction00:42 Interview with Dr. Irwin Goldstein01:03 Understanding PGAD05:17 Initial Approaches to Treatment07:05 New Discoveries in PGAD Research22:08 Success Stories and Challenges30:13...2025-01-1334 minBetter Sex257: Non-monogamy and sex addiction with Ari LewisIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes Ari Lewis to discuss the often conflated topics of consensual non-monogamy and compulsive sexual behavior. They delve into the misconceptions and stereotypes surrounding consensual non-monogamy, such as its conflation with sexual addiction and the perceived elevated risk of STIs. Ari explains the important distinctions between consensual non-monogamy and compulsive sexual behavior, highlighting key factors like informed consent, honoring values, mutual respect, and mutual benefit. The conversation also touches on coercive non-monogamy and the role of shame in driving compulsive sexual behavior, concluding with a proposed model for...2025-01-0634 minBetter Sex255: Psychedelic Sex Therapy with Dr. Steven RadowitzIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman is joined by Dr. Steven Radowitz, a primary care doctor and ketamine clinic practitioner. They delve into the use of psychedelic drugs, particularly ketamine, in therapy and how it can positively impact mental health and relationships. Dr. Radowitz discusses how psychedelics help treat mental health conditions, the science behind ketamine's effectiveness, and the potential for its future use. He also explains the importance of integration and proper settings for these treatments, and how they can lead to profound personal and relational growth.00:00 Welcome...2024-12-2339 minBetter Sex254: Sex After First Baby with Dr. Ashley StaatsJoin host Jessa Zimmerman on the Better Sex podcast as she converses with Dr. Ashley Staats about the challenges of maintaining intimacy after the birth of a child, particularly the first baby. The discussion dives into common myths, like the six-week readiness period, and details the emotional and physical complexities that couples face. They explore how to foster communication, manage expectations, and the significance of mutual support and understanding during this transformative life stage. The episode is packed with personal stories, expert advice, and practical strategies to help couples sustain a healthy intimate relationship post-childbirth.2024-12-1631 minBetter Sex253: Sexual Sovereignty and Pleasure with Dr. Saida DesiletsIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman speaks with Dr. Saida Désilets about women's sexual pleasure and the idea of sexual sovereignty. Dr. Désilets shares her personal journey starting from childhood, discussing the impacts of trauma, the cultural stigmas around female pleasure, and the importance of creating a safe space within one's own body. They delve into the physiological benefits of pleasure, breathing techniques, and practices to enhance sensual and sexual wellbeing. Listeners are provided with actionable tips to connect more deeply with their bodies and embrace their own sexual sovereignty....2024-12-0939 minBetter Sex251: Better Sex Through Science with Dr. Molly MaloofIn this episode of Better Sex, Jessa Zimmerman interviews Dr. Molly Maloof, a physician who explores the significant impact of relationships on health and longevity. Dr. Maloof delves into the connection between human relationships and overall well-being, highlighting the innovative Adamo method she developed to enhance passion, connection, and sexual satisfaction among couples. The discussion covers various topics, from the basics of energy metabolism to the science of love, trauma-informed sex therapy, and the promising future of AI in medicine. The episode offers listeners valuable insights into how healthy relationships and sexual health contribute to living a longer, happier...2024-11-2534 minBetter Sex250: Fascia for Better Sex with Anna RaheIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman engages in a detailed discussion with Anna Rahe about fascia, a system of connective tissues in the body. They explore how fascia impacts sexual health, pain, pleasure, flexibility, and overall bodily function. Rae shares insights from her personal journey of overcoming severe health issues through understanding and working with her fascia. Listeners learn about the relationship between fascia and various body systems, the importance of movement and hydration for fascia health, and practical strategies to improve fascia function. The episode also includes a demonstration of exercises beneficial for pelvic floor...2024-11-1843 minBetter Sex249: Healing from Sex-Negative Religion with Beverly DaleIn this episode of Better Sex, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman talks with Reverend Beverly Dale, who discusses her journey in helping people heal from sex-negative teachings in religion. They explore how sexuality and spirituality intersect, the sexual wounds caused by rigid religious structures, and the path towards embracing one's authentic sexual self.00:00 Introduction00:45 Guest Introduction and Topic Overview02:24 Reverend Beverly Dale's Background02:49 The Church's Role in Sexual Shame03:17 Understanding Sexual Wounding03:24 Intersection of Faith and Healing03:43 Analyzing Structural Issues10:25 Sexual...2024-11-1134 minBetter Sex247: How Stress Blocks Desire with Danielle SavoryIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman engages with mindfulness and pleasure coach Danielle Savory to explore the intertwined roles of mindfulness, self-compassion, and stress management in enhancing sexual desire and intimacy. The discussion delves into the physiological and psychological impacts of stress on sexual connection, emphasizing the different ways men and women handle stress and the resulting challenges. Practical techniques to improve mindfulness and awareness during sexual interactions are provided, alongside strategies for managing stress individually and within relationships. The episode also outlines personal experiences and transformations, underscoring the importance of self-regulation, creating personal...2024-10-2832 minBetter Sex246: Elevating Sexual Pleasure with Aaron MichaelIn this enlightening episode of Better Sex, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman converses with sex and relationship coach Aaron Michael. The discussion unpacks Aaron's journey into sexual health, beginning with his experiences in massage therapy and addressing his personal challenges. Key topics include 'suction sex,' 'embodied consent,' and 'embodied love,' offering a fresh approach to sexual pleasure, intimacy, and mutual satisfaction. Practical insights about overcoming numbness, understanding psychological and physical barriers, and the role of self-pleasuring in building confidence are explored. Additionally, the episode highlights the disparity within the sexual wellness industry, advocating for better...2024-10-2139 minBetter Sex245: Reverse Your Menopause Symptoms with Dr. Irwin GoldsteinIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes Dr. Irwin Goldstein (Dr, G(, a pioneer in sexual medicine, to discuss the intricacies of menopause and women's sexual health. The conversation delves into the hormonal changes during menopause, common misconceptions, and the benefits of seeking treatment even though menopause is a natural phase. Dr. G emphasizes the importance of understanding the Genital Urinary Syndrome of Menopause (GSM) and its symptoms, and discusses various reversible treatment options including bioidentical hormones. The episode highlights the significant impact of monitored hormone management on improving women's health and the importance of educating...2024-10-1438 minBetter Sex244: The Art of Listening with Christine MilesIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes Christine Miles, an expert in the skill of listening, to discuss its significance in intimate relationships and beyond. The conversation delves into the importance of actively cultivating listening skills rather than relying on innate ability. Christine shares her own background and how understanding her mother's underlying pain led her to become an empathetic listener. The episode explores common pitfalls and barriers to effective listening, such as digital distractions and emotional defenses, and offers strategies to overcome them. Christine elaborates on a structured approach to listening, presenting six foundational tools...2024-10-0737 minBetter Sex243: Talking to Your Kids About Sex with Melissa KilbrideIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman speaks with Melissa Kilbride about the importance of open and honest conversations with children regarding sex, sexuality, and pornography. Melissa shares her background in social work and emphasizes the necessity of early and age-appropriate sex education to prevent sexual abuse, promote sexual health, and reduce shame. They discuss the impacts of societal and parental silence on sexual topics, providing practical advice for discussing these topics with children from a young age. The episode also touches on the challenges and considerations for parents monitoring their children's online activity and...2024-09-3035 minBetter Sex242: Overcoming religious sexual shame with Natasha HelferAddressing Religious Sexual Shame with Jessa Zimmerman and Natasha HelferIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman chats with sex therapist Natasha Helfer about religious sexual shame. They discuss its origins, the impact it has on individuals, and ways to overcome it. Natasha shares insights from her personal background, professional experiences, and offers practical advice through the 'pep talk' approach (Permission, Education, Practice, Talk). The episode also explores various religious teachings and their effects on sexual behavior and health, delivering valuable information for those trying to reconcile their sexual and...2024-09-2339 minBetter Sex241: Sex and Our Stress Response with Rachel PosnerUnderstanding Stress Responses and Mindfulness in Intimate RelationshipsIn this episode of the Better Sex podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman interviews Rachel Posner, who discusses the importance of understanding and managing stress responses in intimate relationships. Rachel explains the body's stress mechanisms like fight, flight, or freeze responses, and how these can affect our connections and sexual encounters. She emphasizes the significance of mindfulness and practical techniques like breath awareness to regulate the nervous system, aiming for greater safety, connection, and pleasure in relationships. Various strategies and the benefits of mindfulness are...2024-09-1631 minBetter Sex240: Making and Keeping Agreements with Martha KauppiIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes back guest Martha Kauppi for a vibrant discussion on the art of making and keeping agreements in relationships. They explore the importance of having explicit conversations to establish trust and understanding between partners. Topics include identifying when and what types of agreements should be made, the significance of revisiting and renegotiating agreements, and developing the skills needed to navigate these discussions constructively. The episode also delves into distinctive challenges faced by both monogamous and polyamorous couples, providing insights into maintaining integrity and trust. Listeners are guided on...2024-09-0951 minBetter Sex239: Peyronie's Disease with Dr. Irwin GoldsteinIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman discusses Peyronie's disease with Dr. Irwin Goldstein, a pioneer in sexual medicine. They explore the causes, diagnosis, and treatment options of the disease, and offer insights into both men's and women's perspectives on the condition.00:00 Introduction01:29 Guest Introduction01:52 Understanding Peyronie's Disease03:11 Causes and Risk Factors11:09 Symptoms and Diagnosis17:37 Treatment Options34:33 Patient Perspectives36:30 ConclusionLooking to work with Jessa? Visit https://www.intimacywithease.com2024-09-0238 minBetter Sex238: Spicing up your sex life with Dan PurcellIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, Jessa Zimmerman is joined by Dan Purcell, creator of the app Intimately Us, to discuss how to truly spice up your sex life through intimacy and personal growth. Dan shares his personal journey and insights about overcoming sexual ruts, improving communication, and embracing eroticism in marriage. Together, they offer practical advice and tips for couples looking to reignite their connection.00:00 Introduction01:35 Meeting Dan Purcell01:49 Dan's Personal Story03:04 The Catalyst for Change07:09 Starting the Journey Together10:48 The...2024-08-2644 minBetter Sex236: The Transformative Handjob with Lee JaggerIn this episode of Better Sex, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman interviews Lee Jagger, a sex coach specializing in helping women with male partners. Lee shares her journey from an unexpected start in erotic massage to becoming an expert with over 2000 clients and developing 69+ techniques for pleasuring men. They discuss the importance of communication, confidence, and overcoming discomfort in the bedroom. Lee emphasizes how women can enhance their intimate relationships by initiating and mastering various techniques while fostering stronger connections with their partners. The episode also covers practical advice for overcoming aversion to genital touch, techniques for men with erectile...2024-08-1243 minBetter Sex235: Porn Literacy with Diane GleimIn this episode of the Better Sex podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman is joined by expert Diane Gleim to discuss the concept of porn literacy. Diane explains the importance of understanding porn as a form of entertainment and not education, recognizing its business nature, and being aware of the sophisticated filmmaking techniques used. The conversation delves into the moral incongruence many viewers feel, the unrealistic expectations set by mainstream porn, and how these can impact real-life intimate relationships. Diane also shares information about her online course designed to provide a comprehensive understanding of porn literacy.2024-08-0539 minBetter Sex234: Overcoming Sexual Inhibitions with Martha Tara LeeIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman chats with certified sexuality educator Martha Tara Lee about overcoming sexual inhibitions, particularly in Asian cultures. They discuss the impact of cultural, religious, and educational backgrounds on sexual expression and provide practical advice to help individuals and couples enhance their sexual knowledge and intimacy.00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast00:47 Guest Introduction: Martha Tara Lee01:24 Understanding Sexual Inhibitions02:08 Cultural Influences on Sexuality03:17 Challenges and Misconceptions05:11 Therapeutic Approaches and Techniques11:59 Client Experiences and Success Stories2024-07-2927 minBetter Sex233: Talking to Your Doctor About Sex with Dr. Maureen RyanIn this episode of BetterSex, host Jessa Zimmerman interviews nurse practitioner and sexual health expert, Maureen Ryan. Topics include the importance of discussing sexual health with medical providers, tips for patients to advocate for their sexual health, and the common issues like erectile dysfunction, low desire, sexual performance anxiety, and painful sex. Maureen shares her journey into the field, emphasizing the need for healthcare providers to ask the right questions and provide a safe, non-judgmental environment for patients to discuss intimate concerns. She also highlights the necessity of ongoing education and skills for medical professionals to improve patient care.2024-07-2224 minBetter Sex232: Repair after Relationship Rupture with Dr. Chelsea BurtonIn this episode of BetterSex, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes therapist and sex expert Chelsea Burton to discuss the concept of relationship ruptures and how to repair them. The conversation covers both major ruptures like infidelity and smaller, everyday breaches of trust. Chelsea explains the importance of acknowledging and repairing these ruptures to maintain and improve intimate relationships. The episode delves into attachment theory, the role of empathy, and strategies for reconnecting emotionally and physically with your partner, even after significant betrayals. Practical advice for couples on maintaining connection and rebuilding trust is shared throughout the discussion.2024-07-1529 minBetter Sex231: Am I normal and other FAQ with Michael CastlemanAm I Normal? Exploring Common Sexual Concerns with Michael CastlemanIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes back Michael Castleman to discuss the most frequently asked questions about sex that he has received over the past decade. They delve into the pervasive 'Am I normal?' question, addressing the cultural confusion surrounding sexuality, the impact of upbringing on sexual attitudes, and the normalization of diverse sexual practices. The conversation also touches on the influence of pornography, social media's effects on intimacy, and the progress in societal acceptance of various sexual behaviors...2024-07-0836 minBetter Sex230: Sexual Behavior Analysis with Nicholas Maio-AetherIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman interviews Nicholas Maio-Aether, a pioneer in sexual behavior analysis. They dive into the behavioral approach to changing sexual behaviors, emphasizing consensual goal-setting and positive reinforcement. Nicholas explains the methodologies used in behavior analysis, the importance of reducing punishment, and how this field can be beneficial both for individuals with disabilities and neurotypical clients. They also discuss the differences between traditional sex therapy and sexual behavior analysis, as well as the populations best suited for each. Nicholas shares insights into his practice, his training program for professionals, and his...2024-07-0138 minBetter Sex229: Overcoming Purity Culture with Esther HooleyIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman talks with Esther Hooley to address the impacts of purity culture on individuals and their sexuality. They explore how purity culture influences sexual scripts, the resulting shame, and how one can begin to heal and embrace their true sexuality. Esther discusses her book, 'Embracing Erotic Wholeness,' and how curiosity and reframing spirituality can assist in overcoming the detrimental effects of purity culture.00:00 Introduction00:45 Guest Introduction and Topic Overview01:15 Esther's Background03:09 Defining Purity Culture02:28 Impacts of Purity...2024-06-2426 minBetter Sex228: The Orgasm Gap Revisited with Dr. Laurie MintzIn this episode of Better Sex, hosted by sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman, the topic of discussion is the orgasm gap between heterosexual men and women. Joined by Dr. Laurie Mintz, an expert who wrote 'Becoming Cliterate', they explore the reasons behind this gap, which includes the lack of clitoral stimulation for women and societal misconceptions about female pleasure. Dr. Mintz shares insights from her research and teaching experiences, highlights the improvements since her book's publication in 2017, and discusses ways to enhance sexual pleasure through communication, use of vibrators, and changing cultural narratives around sex. The episode provides valuable information...2024-06-1629 minBetter Sex227: The Cure for ED with Dr. Jeff NuziardUnderstanding and Treating Erectile Dysfunction with Dr. Jeff NuziardIn this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes Dr. Jeff Nuziard to discuss erectile dysfunction (ED). They delve into the misconceptions around ED, particularly the false notion that blood flow is the primary issue. Dr. Nuziard shares his personal journey with ED, beginning at age 40, and his research which led to developing a patented treatment protocol that focuses on hormone balance and collagen regeneration. The episode explores traditional and new treatment methods, including hormone replacement therapy, PRP shots, and acoustic shockwave therapy, emphasizing...2024-06-1038 minBetter Sex226: Healing After Infidelity with Rich HellerHealing After Infidelity: Insights and Strategies with Rich HellerIn this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman welcomes back relationship expert Rich Heller to discuss the complex issue of infidelity recovery. They explore the various reasons behind infidelity, the different forms it can take, and the steps toward healing after a breach of trust. Rich emphasizes the importance of understanding and recognizing both partners' roles in the relationship dynamics that may lead to infidelity. The conversation covers topics such as emotional versus physical infidelity, the necessity of honest communication...2024-06-0544 minBetter Sex218: [Personal Story] A Journey Through Miscarriage – JessicaA Journey Through Miscarriage
This episode talks about a very sensitive topic – miscarriage. Losing a baby is heartbreaking, no matter when it happens, and Jessica bravely shares her experience when she and her husband lost their baby. She reveals how she healed – physically, mentally, and emotionally – what moms who suffered the same should know about their options when going through this, and how the experience impacted her relationship with her husband.
Women have options
When you suffer a miscarriage, you would be going through a traumatic loss, but life goes on. You should try an...2022-03-0130 minBetter Sex214: Self-Leadership and Erotic Rope Play – Edward WilleyEdward Willey talks about his seemingly two separate interests and pursuits – rope play and self-leadership – and his ingenious idea of combining them together to develop and practice. How do rope play and self-leadership intersect?
How it started
Prompted by his partner’s brilliant idea, Edward Willey started to introduce some movements and meditation practices he used in self-leadership training into his rope play sessions. He quickly realized that people started to learn rope tying techniques but, more importantly, the connection between partners greatly increased. Since then, each session became more about how to stay deeply connec...2022-01-3133 minBetter Sex209: Right Outside Your Comfort Zone – Court VoxCourt Vox
Somatic sex educator and sex coach Court Vox helps his clients to find the ‘sweet spot’ in their sex lives, and life in general. The sweet spot is a place that can be uncomfortable, but also exciting. This episode is all about pushing yourself to the limit, and calibrating the body in order to allow itself to reach the next level of experience.
What is calibration?
Calibration is developing an awareness of touch from the lowest point of sensation all the way to your threshold. It’s finding that sweet spot, also c...2021-12-2734 minBetter Sex208: Endometriosis – Dr. Allyson ShrikhandeDr. Allyson Shrikhande, a rehabilitation doctor who specializes in pelvic rehabilitation medicine, gives us an in-depth discussion about endometriosis. What is endometriosis, the disorder affecting one out of ten women? How does it show up and what are the treatment options?
What is endometriosis?
Endometriosis is a disorder wherein cells that are similar to the cells lining the inside of the uterus (endometrium) grow outside of the uterus. These cells can settle basically anywhere in the body but most commonly in the pelvic cavity and can cause pain and infertility.
How common is endometriosis? 2021-12-2127 minBetter Sex207: Hookup Without Heartbreak – Lia HolmgrenHookup without Heartbreak
Intimacy and relationship coach Lia Holmgren’s new book, Hookup Without Heartbreak, teaches women to let go of negative feelings after casual hook ups/sex, as well as how to reclaim one’s sexual freedom. Learn the do’s and don’ts of casual sex, the history and science behind hooking up, and learn all you need to know before going on that next date.
Casual sex: How do people deal with it?
The main focus of this book is double standards – how casual sex can be widely accepted for men but seen as ina...2021-12-1428 minBetter Sex203: Why Selfish is Good for Sex – Dr. Laura DabneyIn this episode, Dr Laura Dabney explains the importance of selfishness in a relationship. Despite its negative connotation, being selfish can actually make you a better person and partner. Learn why being in tuned to what you want and how you feel is critical and how you can create a balance of giving and selfishness in a relationship.
What does selfishness mean in a relationship?
Simply put, being selfish is taking care of yourself first before others like your partner. Being selfish has always been frowned upon because of its bad connotation but it just...2021-11-1530 minBetter Sex202: Dates & Mates – Damona HoffmanIn this episode, we take a closer look at the exciting world of dating – from using different dating apps to tackling difficult conversations and navigating the dating scene amid a pandemic. Life and dating coach Damona Hoffman shares tips on how to progress relationships and how to deepen them by cultivating curiosity.
For people looking for a relationship, what do they need to know in order to be successful in dating?
Damona said that dating is a pretty and repeatable process. If you are already getting frustrated with dating, learn about these five areas to kno...2021-11-0834 minBetter Sex200: Sex and Veterans – Asya BrodskyIn this episode, Asya Brodsky gives insight into sexual issues and concerns with veterans. From injuries, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or military sexual trauma (MST), Brodsky explains how these experiences can create all kinds of ramifications in the life of a veteran and how these can affect sexual function and intimacy with a partner.
What are the kinds of concerns that are prevalent among veterans?
PTSD is still the most common issue among veterans, as well as PTSD due to MST. According to Brodsky, veterans in combat who come back physically whole carry great psychological...2021-10-2534 minBetter Sex183: [Personal Story] Living with Lichen Sclerosus – TammyTammy brings her journey with Lichen Sclerosus and the experiences of many other women to light in this episode. We hear everything about what it’s like to live with Lichen Sclerosus, its challenges, treatment options, and how to get support.
What is Lichen Sclerosus?
Lichen Sclerosus is an autoimmune condition where the body attacks itself. It is thought to be genetic. It usually occurs in the genitals, but can also affect other areas of the body, where it can cause itching and discoloration on the wrist, inner thighs and stomach. Lichen Sclerosus affects young and ol...2021-06-2836 minBetter Sex162: Perinatal Mental Health & Sex – Emma Shandy AnwayEmma explains what perinatal mental health is and includes thinking about pregnant, becoming pregnant and the intersection of this with your sex life. When sex becomes about having a baby, Emma points out that it can become difficult to connect with your partner. Redefining sex is the focus of her conversations with couples.
You’re Expecting; Now What?
Once pregnant, other issues creep up in terms of body and hormone changes that may affect your sex life. Emma suggests connecting with your partner by answering the question ‘what is sex to you?’ In the case of not...2021-02-0130 minBetter Sex161: Menopause – Dr. Michelle GordonAfter having gone through menopause and being surprised by the event, Michelle discusses her journey to finding out more about it and how to make it easier for other women. She shares her experience after taking the pill, then finding out that she had a mass in her uterus thus leading her to undergo an Endometrial Biopsy. Michelle was unhappy with her body and realized that other women were probably going through the same horrific experience.
Common Problems in Menopause
She discusses how disruptive menopause can be especially since we are not prepared like we...2021-01-2537 minBetter Sex160: Sizzling Sex Across the Lifespan – Michael CastlemanMichael Castleman is a journalist that has been writing specifically about sexuality since 2005. He is also the author of Sizzling Sex across the Lifespan, covering the good bad and ugly bits about the subject. His book contains 25 actual medical studies and is based on facts.
Common Sexual Issues
Poor ejaculatory control is one of his best-selling subjects and you can find his e-book ‘ The Cure for Premature Ejaculation’ on his website. He discusses how differently men and women think about sex and provides advice for men to help improve the statistic that only 20% of women reach orga...2021-01-1847 minBetter Sex159: Erotic Blueprints – DD HaegOn this episode we hear from DD Haeg who tells about the 5 Erotic Blueprints. She explains that this is a map/ language for how to turn each other on. They consist of the following:
Energetics : Like to be teased, enjoy anticipation and prefer lighter touch. A sense of spaciousness appeals to them.
Sensual: These blueprints indulge in all their senses be engaged. Ambience and candles work for them, and they love to be completely engaged.
Sexuals: Respond to very direct sexual gestures, love nudity and quickies!
Kinky: These types respond to things that are...2021-01-1133 minBetter Sex157: Body Image Liberation – KaRonna LynnLiberation guide KaRonna Lynn, deals with body image obstacles. Liberation to KaRonna is about following what is liberating to you and not necessarily what society has defined as liberating. Most of her work is around body image but it is not confined to this.
Three Pronged Approach to Body Image Liberation
KaRonna discusses her three-pronged approach which includes, the physical body, our mental space and the culture we grew up in. Her work entails helping people unpack these things to understand her clients better. She emphasizes that this is a personal journey for each person and...2020-12-2840 minBetter Sex156: The 5 Seasons of Connection – Leanne KabatOn this episode, we hear about Leanne Kabat’s personal journey. Faced with an illness and a young family, she found clarity and direction on how to choose to get out of chaos or conflict. She discusses what she calls the five seasons, what they mean and how to get to the “Summer” that we all love and need.
Dealing with Issues
She shares Spring cleaning methods that different people prefer in order to resolve difficult situations. Glossing things over is not an option, as the reference of Spring cleaning implies. She emphasizes getting dirty, uncovering painfu...2020-12-2141 minBetter Sex154: Masculine Sexual Leadership – GS YoungbloodGS found his path after his own painful journey in his personal life and used this to create his book and help others. He references strong women and clarifies that these are women that have a clear understanding of their own worth.
Reflecting on the evolution of men and women, GS highlights historically, the role of men as dominators and leaders until women became more capable and assertive. His book helps men understand how to adapt to this without losing themselves or diminishing their partners strength.
Masculine Leadership
We learn what masculine and...2020-12-0735 minBetter Sex152: Learning From LGBTQ Elders – Dr. Jane FleishmanAt age 56, Jane went back to finish her PhD and completed this at 62. She tells us this brought her into her own intellectually. She chose to focus on sexuality, as she found it to be the root of humanity’s problems. Her specialty is sexuality and aging. Her book, the Stonewall Generation, focuses on LGBTQ elders and the process required her to find people to interview.
Her writing journey took her to the story of Stonewall “the birth of the modern day rights movement“ which stands today as a historical event for the gay community.
Inclusi...2020-11-2335 minBetter Sex151: Blocks to Orgasm – Kim AkriggKim joins me on this episode to discuss blocks to orgasm. Her aim is to work with the subconscious mind to transform women.
What Blocks Orgasm?
She delves into the root of the problem being control over women even at an intimate level and shares what these blocks actually look like. She touches on society’s reaction to kids unknowingly exploring their bodies and being shamed for their behavior as opposed to them being guided to understand when it’s appropriate.
Other blocks include sexual trauma and religion which frowns upon individuals seeking physical pleasur...2020-11-1729 minBetter Sex150: Talking To Your Kids About Porn – Braxton DutsonHow to Talk to Your Kids About Porn
With children being exposed to porn as early as 10 today, Braxton, teaches us how to deal with pornography and kids. He defines porn as content that is intentionally created for a sexual purpose like arousal.
For many parents, the task may seem daunting and confusing to broach. In this episode, Braxton takes us by the hand and explains exactly what we need to do to raise healthy, aware and responsible children.
His advice is to start by knowing your own parameters and values. The journey s...2020-11-1042 minBetter Sex149: The State of Our Union – Dr. Corey AllanState of Our Union Program
Bringing personal life experience to the fore, Corey explains how the idea of ‘The State Of Our Union’ came about. On a weekly basis Corey and his wife used a text message reminder with 5 questions. This helped them escape work and family distractions and sit down with each other religiously to talk about their personal lives, sex and their emotions.
They now have a program you can join that allows you to practice the same commitment with your partner in order to share meaningful conversations. Once a week you will get a te...2020-11-0231 minBetter Sex148: [Personal Story] A Triggered Life – AlbaAlba Soto is my guest on this episode. She shares her ‘triggered life’ experience, which still haunts her today. Her trauma began at the age of 3 at the hand of family members. Alba shares her addiction to masturbation as a coping mechanism which fueled her sense of guilt.
She shares how she managed to escape this life and the twist of events that led her abusers back to her. People pleasing was Alba’s symptom of her trauma, always aiming to be a ‘good girl.’
In an eye opening observation, Alba explains that trauma is the gateway...2020-10-2645 minBetter Sex147: Becoming Sex Positive with Heather ShannonHeather Shannon joins us on this episode to delve deeper into what being sex positive or sex negative actually means. In explaining what it actually means, Shannon relates it to a sense of freedom that you would find between two consenting parties to express whoever they are with each other.
We discover how sex negativity is integrated into our society and how liberating it can be to know other variations and options regarding sexuality.
What Does it Mean to Be Sex Negative
Shannon shares examples of this which include discomfort around sexual orientation, performance...2020-10-1936 minBetter Sex141: Doing Non-Monogamy Well – Tristan TaorminoOn this episode we dig into non-monogamy with Tristan Taormino. She discusses how the processing of both parties feelings is a crucial element to open relationships. Interestingly, she shares how working on yourself is a big part of the open-minded approach required to make this type of thing work.
The Importance of Boundaries in Consensual Non-monogamy
Tristan recommends a slow start and provides clear guidelines and examples on how to do this. Knowing what you want and need makes setting boundaries easier. These boundaries include whether or not you and your partner wish to keep your...2020-09-0852 minBetter Sex140: Bawdy Bookworms – Thien-Kim LamOn this episode, we visit the topic of erotic fantasy in a box! Thien-Kim came up with the idea after selling sex toys at parties and one day finding herself aroused while reading a novel.
She compares books today versus those written decades ago, explaining how writing has evolved for today’s audience. While older books come across as forceful, today’s books around heterosexual characters, usually lean toward romantic beginnings that consider the pleasure of the female partner first.
Gender Diversity
With many obstacles around sexually diverse characters, Thien-Kim notes that many authors self...2020-09-0123 minBetter Sex139: Safer Sex & STIs – Kayla PottsOn this episode, Kayla Potts educates us about STIs. She highlights that people often do not display symptoms when they have an STI and recommends testing as the only way to be certain of your status. From Kayla’s experience, she has found that it’s better to specify each individual test you require to your healthcare provider.
When Should You Test for STIs
If you are wondering how often to get tested, Kayla encourages us to test once a year if you have one partner. Multiple partners moves you up to 3 to 6 months. In a perf...2020-08-2557 minBetter Sex#2: Edy Nathan - Grief, Sex, and LifeDuring this important conversation about grief and how it impacts our lives, especially within the context of our sex lives, Jessa and guest Edy Nathan help us to recognize that sexual changes throughout life are not always looked at as moments of grief. But, they certainly are and even if they seem small, they can add up to bigger, more powerful moments.Edy also helps us to understand the phases of grief. And, to see what may have shifted or changed in our lives which could have a dramatic impact on our feelings towards sex.Listen...2017-12-2835 minBetter Sex#1: Sar Surmick - Sexual Consent, Did They Say "No?"It's all over the news these days and sexual consent is important everywhere, even in a committed relationship.
There are no "givens" and consent is required, no matter the situation. Especially if you change something within the relationship. Consent is basically a temporary license which must be renewed, you cannot take anything for granted.
It is often quite hard to say "No!" Misunderstandings and miscommunications revolving around sexual consent, expectations, and even entitlement can lead to resentment or consent incidents.
Even though the damage may not be intentional, the person who has violated...2017-12-2836 min