Shows
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp. 39- Who's That GirlIt's Maydonna! Join us as we celebrate the cinematic exploits of one Ms. Ciccone, starting with Who's That Girl (no question mark). This may be the first sign of a divorce, as Kerry, let's just say, HATED this movie. Will she ever forgive Honeybeard for this one? And what the hell is a Pumala Voorhees? Thanks to Old Sons for the intro ("Necklace") and Hooplas for the outro (Carolina Love Song)!2025-05-072h 24
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp. 38 - Real GeniusWe shelved the Kerrymania episode previously scheduled for this week in favor of honoring the late, great, Val Kilmer. This is one of Honeybeard's favorites, but how will Kerry react? Why does she hate Great Danes and popcorn? And is that...Uncle Rico!? Thanks to Old Sons for the intro and Hooplas for the outro!2025-04-233h 17
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp. 37- No Holds BarredIt's Kerrymania, brother! With Wrestlemania coming up, Kerry and Honeyebeard dive into the Hulk Hogan masterpiece, No Holds Barred. Listen as we discuss why the NWA was better than the WWF, the infamous "dookie" scene, as well Vince McMahon's and Hogan's scumbaggery. Kerrymania is running wild! Thanks as always to the Hooplas for Carolina Love Song, our awesome intro/outro music.2025-04-091h 54
Kerry Never Saw ThatA Very Special Episode #1- Punky Brewster "Just Say No"April Fools! It's a Kerry ACTUALLY Saw That! Just for funsies we went back and watched some "very special episodes" of Kerry's favorite 80s sitcoms .Today we bring you Season 2 Episode 8 of Punky Brewster entitled "Just Say No." Learn what shows Kerry loved a kid, why she still wants Punky's treehouse, and whether or not she would have been a Chicklet! Thanks as always to The Hooplas for "Carolina Love Song"2025-04-011h 16
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 36- AliensBadass beeyotches month continues with the return of Kerry's favorite xenomorph-slaying, orphan-saving, My Two Dads hating, asskicking double-x chromosomed hero, Ellen Ripley. Find out if Kerry loves this one as much as the first as well as how ampules of Lorenzini fit into the equation, why sharks hate Rush, and why it took so long for Ripley to give Newt a bath. Thanks as always to The Hooplas for "Carolina Love Song."2025-03-262h 18
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 35- Terminator 2The theme for this month being BADASS BITCHES brings Sarah Connor back to the KNST podcast. Give a listen to find out about the future and possible progeny of the infamous Mister "Pissy Bum Britches" from the first movie.2025-03-122h 11
Kerry Never Saw ThatBonus Episode: The Golden RaspKerriesIt can't be all positivity, right? If you want that, go check out the OsKers episode. Here you'll find nothing but snark and a heartbroken Honeybeard as Kerry takes a big five-piler on some of his favorites. (I mean, he can't be the only fan of Wisdom, right? Right?) Killer Klowns, Vision Quest, St. Elmo, and Andrew McCarthy's bare buttocks (among others) walk the raspberry carpet to pick up their sacks full of shame.2025-03-021h 04
Kerry Never Saw ThatBonus Episode: The OsKersIt's been almost a year since we started this little podcast and since it (nearly) coincides with some other silly awards show, we decided to to hand out some statuettes of our own! Put on your ball gowns, don your tuxedos, and prepare your acceptance speeches: it's the first annual OsKer Awards!2025-03-021h 11
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 34- PerfectAin't Valentines Day at KNST has been celebrated by watching another relationship movie- Perfect. Kerry was unaware that this movie existed. (She wishes she still were.) Jamie Lee Curtis is HAWT but the faces that she and John Travolta make at each other while Jazzercizing are wholly inexcusable.2025-02-262h 21
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 33-Fatal AttractionIn this episode, Kerry and Honeybeard ponder the logistics of dirty-dish nookie, Glenn Close's crunchy hair, Michael Douglass' stamina, and forget the rabbit...what is up with that child's hair?2025-02-122h 35
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 32- Valley GirlLike, OH. MY. GOD. This episode is so bitchin! Kerry like totally like, almost five piled it in like the first five minutes, but fer sure, she kept watching. So did she think this was totally tubular or grody to the max? Well Peter Piper picked a pepper, I guess you'll have to listen and find out! As if!
Thank you as always to The Hooplas for the music! Check them out on Spotify, Bandcamp, and all that good stuff.2025-01-292h 02
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp- 31 MoonstruckHoneybeard's joy cannot be contained as it's his favorite time of year...Happy Nic Year! Celebrating the genius of one Mr. Nicolas Cage, listen as we evaluate Cher's A-listerness, Nic Cage's moistness and proximity to a glory hole, and some perplexing age gaps. And why doe he wear a glove on a wooden hand?
Intro music by The Hooplas "Carolina Love Song"
Outro music by Old Suns "Necklace"2025-01-141h 25
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 30- Emmitt Otter's Jug Band ChristmasKerry Christmas, everybody (x2!!) The second film in our Xmas double feature has arrived, wrapped, under your...address bar. A Muppet version of The Gift of the Magi where they sing a knee-slapper about how absurdly massive Grandma Otter's bathing suit was- hilarity ensues! Can't forget about Pa and how he kindly died and left them destitute as a result of his failed "snake oil" venture. Good times!!2024-12-251h 01
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 29- The Muppet MovieKerry Christmas, everybody! Here is the first half of our Xmas gift to you- a Jim Henson double feature! Why are Muppet legs so disturbing? Why do we spit in the face of God by allowing the unnatural relationship between Gonzo and Camilla the chicken?! Is Miss Piggy a sex pest?? (Spoiler alert- yes. Yes she is.)2024-12-251h 37
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 28- Gremlins/Gremlins 2Everybody remembers the ultra-precious Gizmo, but do you happen to recall the questionable relationship between grown-ass Billy who works in a bank for a living and 11-year-old Pete (Corey Feldman) who just comes over and hangs out in Billy's bedroom? On Billy's bed. With Billy.
Also, can we talk about how Gizmo's litter in Gremlins 2 seemed...different? Special? Slightly undercooked? Crooked??2024-12-112h 03
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 27- Planes, Trains, and AutomobilesPlanes, trains, and...goose shit?? We have been sitting on this one for a while, and it is perfect for Thanksgiving Day! You don't want to miss Kerry reenacting the rental car tirade in her specific brand of southern drawl! Honeybeard notes that Steve Martin's wife is making bedroom eyes at John Candy and pontificates what they will be having for dessert!
As always thanks to The Hooplas for letting us use their "Carolina Love Song" as intro/outro badassery!2024-11-281h 58
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 26- The 'BurbsHere's the final course of T.Hanksgiving- The 'Burbs! We've all had weird neighbors, but maybe not THIS weird...that's right, we're talking about Corey Feldman! Why TF is he even IN this movie?! Why did Honeybeard bully a poor kid just because his name was Art? And is he really fart?? These are the burning questions that inquiring people want to know!2024-11-272h 25
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 25- The Money PitT. Hanksgiving continues with The Money Pit which left Kerry with new anxieties surrounding home ownership. Yakov Smirnoff...I'm sorry, who?? Kerry and Honeybeard BOTH want the huge portrait of the Maestro in their living room! We learned that studio apartments in SoHo are reportedly $350/month- OUTRAGEOUS! Kudos to The Hooplas for making the kickass "Carolina Love Song" that is our intro/outro amazingness! Check them out at TheHooplas.com2024-11-272h 09
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 24- DragnetPeople. Against. Goodness. And. Normalcy. P.A.G.A.N. PAGAN. Kerry has heard these words many times over the years, and now she gets to see where they originated! This was a fun one that required a few "bleeps" and was elevated even further with the addition of the official change to our intro/outro music to Carolina Love Song by The Hooplas! How did Streebeck convince Muzz to place his testicles in that drawer?! Why does Honeybeard claim Granny Monday and Streebeck fan fic exists??
Check out The Hooplas on instagram @Thehooplasband
https://l.facebook.com/l.php...2024-11-132h 29
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 23- PhantasmIt is still October, so here is another S'Kerry movie- Phantasm. WTF even IS this movie? Reggie and his 1950s soda-jerk ice cream clothes are integral to the understanding of this intellectual tour-de-force! Just kidding. Kerry was expecting balls. Like, many flying, shiny, silver balls with fancy knife attachments! She was underwhelmed in that regard. Somebody call the "Cinnabytes" because Honeybeard's Jason Voorhees crossover exploits know no bounds!!
Music credits:
Necklace by Old Suns (intro & outro)
Carolina Love Song by The Hooplas2024-10-311h 32
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 22- Bad News BearsThe second-helping of our surprise baseball Double-Header is here with 1976's Bad News Bears! Kerry has some thoughts on small children that have "colorful" vocabularies and several questions regarding how a middle-aged-man (named Kelly Leak) with a second mortgage qualified to play in this little league. Honeybeard pontificates on a young Jason Voorhees playing for the Bad News Scares (sKERs)!2024-10-251h 48
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 21- Major LeagueMajor League! An MLB related classic being brought to you (as part of a Double Header!!) in recognition of the World Series! This one is breaking established format expectations because it happens to be one of the first recordings we made. So grab your peanuts and Cracker Jacks and settle in to see if Kerry assigns this popular film one, two, or three strikes (YOU'RE OUT)!!2024-10-251h 32
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 20- HellraiserKerry thought this was going to be a movie like Puppet Master...it was NOT like Puppet Master. This movie is damp. It is soggy. it is very, very wet. Kerry was delighted to learn "Pinhead" was a big ole sassy pants, but disappointed to learn "Cinna-bites" are not literal tiny cinnamon-flavored treats!! Honeybeard tells his best "Jason versus" to date. Stick around at the end of the episode- Kerry stuck her current favorite song on there- "Carolina Love Song" by The Hooplas!!2024-10-162h 13
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 19- Night of the DemonsIt's October, which can only mean it is FINALLY time for S'Kerry Movies™ on KNST!! Grab your own sweet treat (if you want to) as you settle in to listen to Kerry's reaction to Honeybeard's "trick" of pretending this was a good movie!! *Mua-hahaha* This one had some technical difficulties, but hopefully entertains! Kerry LOVED the Alice in Wonderland costume, but that alone cannot give a movie a higher rating on the shit-o-meter, can it? Can it?!2024-10-022h 37
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 18- Fast Times at Ridgemont HighHold up...Kerry never saw THIS movie? The Phoebe Cates pool scene?! Spicoli?? Wow. Hey- why did Phoebe Cates get all the acclaim when JJL was the one sowing her wild oats all over Ridgemont?2024-09-261h 50
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 17- Vision QuestOur 'Back to School' theme continues and 1985's Vision Quest has come to KNST town bringing high school wrestling, Native American lore, Matthew Modine AND Madonna! WWE is entertaining, but who knew high school wrestling could be so popular?! Kerry had definitely heard the song "Crazy for You" but had no idea it was in this movie...and still doesn't understand WHY it was. Vision Quest was personally recommended, and Kerry takes offense with that recommendation! It couldn't possibly be rated worse than Killer Klowns from Outer Space on the Shit-o-meter could it??
***Also, just kidding- there is no Native...2024-09-261h 59
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 16- Police AcademyKerry takes her first trip to the Blue Oyster Bar! How awkward must it have been for Mahoney under that podium? How many times can Honeybeard say, "The Goot" before Kerry loses her sanity?! I wonder what happened to poor FlavaFlav when he escaped his height.2024-09-111h 45
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 15- Back to SchoolIt's back to school time, so here you go. We had enough of young people and their silly problems following the Brat Pack summer- we had to age up. Why does Kerry HATE Jason Melon? RDJ steals this movie by doing nothing. Rodney Dangerfield looks like there is excessive pressure in his cranium pushing his eyeballs out with ease, and how exactly did he become famous? The infamous "Triple Lindy" of course! Oh, and Kerry would like to add one more thing, "EFF YOU JASON!!!!!"2024-08-282h 03
Kerry Never Saw ThatKNST Brat Pack Pat on the Back, Jack!Our first bonus episode! As we wrap up, discuss, and award our favorite Bractors and Bractresses from our wild Brat Pack summer!! This one doesn't follow format, so it's a bonus!! Award categories include such bangers as best supporting Bractor, best hair, most toxic couple, and BIGGEST L'IL BITCH.2024-08-252h 14
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 14- Sixteen CandlesAh yes, a beloved classic Kerry was sure to love, right? RIGHT? Listen to find out where she (and Cap'n Honeybeard) land on this iconic 80s teen flick. F-bombs and nudity in a PG-rated tween movie? Come join us for some Long (Duck) Dong! Plus, a huge shoutout to the amazing Belushi Speedball for letting us use their song at the end of the episode. And what is an oily bohunk anyway?2024-08-142h 31
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 13- WisdomWas it all a blue-bathwater fever dream? Don't suggest that to Honeybeard!! He can only sleep at night by knowing John Wisdom's last meal was a modestly-delicious discarded (tuna salad?!) sandwich. Does Chinese food really taste better out of those white to-go boxes with the red pagoda on the side?? Kerry desperately needs to know! As an aside- how erotic is making your tongue imitate a windshield wiper on someone's ear drum?! Maybe we need to get out more. (Just so you know, 13 is Kerry's favorite number.)2024-08-072h 30
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp-12 Repo ManOnly one Brat Packer? One Emilio is worth at least two Brat Packers! Kerry does a complete 180 on this one during the show; listen to find out how and why. (Turns out she just needed Honeybeard to mansplain it to her)2024-07-311h 35
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 11- Less Than ZeroHow good is Robert Downey Jr in this? Why did we have to wait this long to see Andrew McCarthy's Winnie the Pooh impression? What di Kerry make Honeybeard bleep this week?2024-07-171h 57
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 10- About Last Night (1986)Kerry Never Saw That? Kerry never heard of this one! Rob Lowe was made for print media- like a staged hamburger for a fast food commercial...photogenic for sure but utterly devoid of nutrition. Another Chicago-related movie? Which part of this film did Lil Honeybeard watch over and over?? Not for nothing, but have we told y'all that we have been married for over 25 years and still have differing opinions?! Kerry is usually right. Demi Moore's boobies and Jim Belushi make appearances in the movie, not the podcast. This episode has some jokes, but also might hit close to home...2024-07-032h 29
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 9- St. Elmo's FireOne of the quintessential Brat Pack classics! So, why is Kerry mad about it? Does Rob Lowe give the BEST going-away gifts? What would you do if a deranged Emilio Estevez beat on your cabin door? Should we have a new mascot named "Sweaty Saxman?" Give us a listen to hear the answers to all or none of these questions as we kick off Brat Pack Summer!2024-06-192h 01
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 8- Killer Klowns From Outer SpaceWanna know why is Kerry pissed-off at Honeybeard? Big Tobacco and Little Debbie run amok in this bat-shit fever-dream of a movie! Also...creampies galore. THE BALLOON DOG BARKS AND SNIFFS?!? Takeaway- boop 'em in the nose.2024-06-011h 34
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 7- ScarfaceHow did he get that scar again?! How old were YOU when you saw Scarface? How hard can it possibly be to properly censor an inappropriate comment?!?! The biggest takeaway from Kerry's reaction..."SO MUCH COCAINE!!!"2024-05-152h 07
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 6- Better Off DeadThis was a fun one! An attempt was (poorly) made to BLEEP an F bomb- see if you can find it. Another KNST first- there is an addendum added after we finished the episode because the name Dan Schneider happened across our radar. Also- I WANT MY 2 DOLLARS! PLUS TIP!!!2024-05-021h 18
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 5- Wall StreetHold up, greed is GOOD?! How much DNA did Martin Sheen give to Charlie as opposed to Emilio Esteves? Why were the 2 main characters of this film named Fox and Gecko?? Which is a better indicator of a nefarious businessman, suspenders or dress shirts with contrasting colored collar and cuffs?? These are the real questions. We don't answer them, but we certainly ask them! Also, somehow the question of what a brand-new butt crack might smell like straight from the sea?! Give us a listen and dazzle us with your best answers!2024-04-171h 13
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 4- AlienHow much hardware was needed to power all those tiny white lightbulbs? Who taught the computer (Mother) to speak Jive?? How bad would "morning breath" be after 6 or 8 months in stasis?! We ask all the burning questions- and attempt to answer through the giggles.2024-04-101h 45
Kerry Never Saw ThatEp 3- When Harry Met SallyHow old are college graduates? Does this movie hold up as the quintessential rom-com? Is the death penalty an acceptable sentence for someone who throws away a perfectly good ice cream cone?? Find answers to these burning questions as well as many you haven't thought to ask.2024-04-021h 14
Kerry Never Saw ThatEpisode 2- The TerminatorTold you we'd be back! Ever wonder how the T-800 recharges? How long would you wear somebody else's soiled britches? Will we still be here in 5 years? Answers to all of these questions and more as Kerry watches the original Terminator!2024-03-261h 56
Kerry Never Saw ThatEpisode 1-The Princess BrideWait...what? How has Kerry never seen The Princess Bride? HOW!? INCONCEIVABLE! Join us as we introduce her to the 80s classic and discuss Fred Savage, the deification of Mandy Patinkin in the KNST household, and the size of Andre the Giant's hog, among other things.2024-03-191h 49
Kerry Never Saw ThatEpisode 0Start here! This is our ground zero episode, where we explain the concept of the show, who we are, and hopefully where we are headed!2024-03-1736 min