Shows
Rating DescendingBonus: Rocky IV31.9% montage, being a Never Hanks, and ending the Cold War. This bonus episode Abigail and Michelle watched Abigail’s favourite Rocky instalment and you should too! They take a quick dive into the film’s banging soundtrack, fear of Russia, and unexpected robot additions2024-12-241h 11Rating Descending077: The Flintstones in Viva Rock VegasMichelle face, more Cumming, and incurable brain damage. This week Abigail and Michelle watch this prequel so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films pretty cast, best jokes, and cheap props2024-05-2255 minRating Descending082: Stan HelsingNutty nut, cornholes, and Michelle Stepping In™️. This week Michelle and Abigail watched another so-called comedy so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films cast, good and bad jokes, and the talentless jerk who made it2024-03-0645 minRating Descending128: The Last Exorcism Part IIRuined orgasms, Bosch visuals, and Dr St Claire. This week Michelle and Abigail watched another fkn 2010s horror movie so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films vapid storyline, stupid spookies, and surprising screenwriter2023-03-2959 minRating Descending135: Inspector GadgetDignified jurping, slam poem reviews, and Michelle’s list of likes. This week Abigail and Michelle watched this cartoon adaptation so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films casting choices, deviations from the show, and cool gadgets2023-02-0853 minRating Descending157: A Wrinkle In TimeBridesmaid pitches, little queer girl culture, and our favourite warrior - Jane Austen. This week Abigail and Michelle watched this 2018 adaptation so you don’t have to. They touch on the film's source material, wholesome message, and astounding cast2022-05-2559 minRating Descending158: Vice (2015)Big Guns, Big Boobs, and Bruce Willis. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the 2015 action flick Vice so you don't have to. They take a quick dive into the film's sloppy premise, connections to sex scandals, and Resorts vs. Timezones2022-05-181h 06Rating Descending159: The GallowsSegue shackles, Achilles vagina, and our final Spookums in Maypril: the Arena Showdown. This week Abigail and Michelle watched the 2015 film The Gallows so you have to. They take a quick dive into the films bland characters, intolerable pace, and silly plot twist2022-05-1159 minRating Descending160: The GrudgeSpecial sick babies, nostrils for appearance, and the smooch-back factor. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the 2020 Grudge remake so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films lack of scares, originality, and story logic2022-05-0448 minRating Descending161: V/H/S ViralSpooky cloaks, curing depression, and demonic genitals. This week Abigail and Michelle watched the third VHS film so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films inscrutable plot, absence of star power, and our favourite silly segments2022-04-2050 minRating Descending162: The Bye Bye ManTitsqueeze Marone, the millennial’s MILF, and the beginning of Spookums in April. This week Michelle and Abigail watched this late 2010’s horror film so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films premise, silly moments, and the origins of the Bye Bye Man2022-04-1356 minRating Descending163: The Last Thing He WantedIndignant, coward, and evil; tag yourself. This week (a near hysterical) Abigail and Michelle watched this Joan Didion adaptation so you don’t have to. They take a confused dive into the films indecipherable plot, nonsensical dialogue, and out-of-it’s-league cast2022-04-0651 minRating Descending164: Highlander II: The Quickening (with Charnstar Anderson)Porcupine men, Argentinian hyperinflation, and trains going 700mph. This week Michelle, Abigail, and special guest Charnstar Anderson watched the Highlander sequel so you don’t have to! They take a dive into the film’s ambitious effects, different edits, and the planet Zeist2022-03-301h 13Rating Descending165: Stop! Or My Mom Will ShootWet humour, rogue wheels, and display home analogies. This week Abigail and Michelle watched another Sly Trainwreck™️ so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the leading duo, the snail-like pace, and some scathing reviews2022-03-2343 minRating Descending166: Fair GameThree moods, the worst Baldwin, and our new segment ‘Michelle Guesses’. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the 1995 film Fair Game so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films leading couple, tropes, and idiotic characters2022-03-1646 minRating Descending167: Wing CommanderCringe is dead, live unironically, and no shame. This week Abigail and Michelle watched the video game adaptation Wing Commander so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films weak script, varied cast, and the lore of the franchise2022-03-091h 01Rating Descending168: Urban Legends: Final CutOrgy hierarchies, 460 going on 470, and Michelle vs the Crown. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the Urban Legends sequel so you don’t have to! They take a sleepy dive into the films camp moments, hammy performances, and it’s divisive quality2022-03-0252 minRating Descending169: Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over (with Gaden Sousa)Pogo toads, flying pigs, and Duck Soup being bi culture. This week Michelle, Abigail and special guest Gaden Sousa watched Spy Kids 3 so you don’t have to. They take a giggly dive into the films blindingly vivid special effects, returning cast members, and silly plot2022-02-231h 03Rating Descending170: Fat AlbertBeing eggsexual, gay baby Michelle, and the Angry Beavers tumblr aesthetic. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the Fat Albert movie so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films lore, goofy characters, and wholesome moments2022-02-1654 minRating Descending171: Basic Instinct 2Facelifts, bad haircuts, and Little Pig Tsars. This week Abigail and Michelle watched Basic Instinct 2: Back in the Habit so you don’t have to. They discuss the films leading lady, drab plot, and it’s attempts at eroticism2022-02-091h 02Rating Descending172: CellBarricus Jones, arm juice, and getting bonked. This week Michelle and Abigail watched Cell so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films vacant leading men, anticlimactic action sequences, and hackneyed genre2022-02-0251 minRating Descending173: The ComebacksRant corners, bad radio, and Mischmelly: She’s Got the Time. This week Abigail and Michelle watched this sports film parody so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films smattering of funny moments, problematic jokes, and the parody movie genre2022-01-2646 minRating Descending174: Cabin Fever 2: Spring FeverPancakes, getting Interpol, and Ti West vs Ti West. This week Michelle and Abigail watched Cabin Fever 2 so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films tongue in cheek comedy, young cast, and gorey moments2022-01-1958 minRating Descending175: College Road TripTragic show animals, little cumballs, and feet; some of us got ‘em. This week Abigail and Michelle watched College Road Trip so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films leading lady, family values, and sparse funny moments2022-01-1249 minRating Descending176: Ghost Rider: Spirit of VengeanceScraping at the door, tortured slaves, and your third eye gumming over. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the Ghost Rider sequel so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films wacky second half, action sequences, and its eccentric leading man2021-12-2958 minRating Descending177: Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty GaloreWho was the man with that grassy little mole? This week Abigail and Michelle watched the Cats and Dogs sequel so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films logic holes, voice actors, and Michelle’s love of infrastructure2021-12-2246 minRating Descending178: Movie 43Terryology, terf school, and saying poop in hell. This week Michelle and Abigail watched Movie 43 so you don’t have to. They take a long dip into the films plot lines, huge cast of characters, and it’s lacklustre comedy2021-12-151h 13Rating Descending179: MarmadukeOh wow! This week Abigail and Michelle watched Marmaduke so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films outstanding cast, misuse of Judy Greer, and the Marmaduke lore2021-12-0848 minRating Descending180: Fantastic Four (2015)Crèches, good guy Matt Patches, and death metal goblins. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the Fantastic Four remake so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films tragic tale of production from start to finish2021-12-011h 09Rating Descending181: Alvin and the Chipmunks: ChipwreckedChipAnon, ‘Minecraft Updates‘, and going fully feral. This week Abigail and Michelle watched this Chipmunk sequel disaster so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the film’s bored cast, technical proficiency, and wild escalation of stakes2021-11-241h 00Rating Descending182: Yoga HosersBratzis, exploding sauerkraut, and a nine inch Abigail. This week Michelle and Abigail watched Yoga Hosers so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films family-inspired cast, disappointing director, and bizarre premise2021-11-1748 minRating Descending183: ExposedSucking shit, 32 producers, and a full sized Keanu strapped to the front of you like a baby. This week Abigail and Michelle watched another K-Man “thriller” so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films leading man, dark themes, and mangled production2021-11-1056 minRating Descending184: SiberiaEverything collapses, spectacular sight, and Cancun. This week Michelle and Abigail watched this K-Man travesty so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into Keanu’s performance, it’s dull love affair, and it’s shoddy direction2021-11-0349 minRating Descending185: Secret ObsessionScreenshotted detectives, Chekhov’s girlfriend, and McConaughfiying. This week Abigail and Michelle watched this Netflix original so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films leading lady, basic plot, and hackneyed dialogue2021-10-2747 minRating Descending186: Grease 2 (with Alice Tovey)Scoring, motorbike mounds, and strange silences. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the messy Grease sequel so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films leading lady, musical numbers, and general rampant horniness2021-10-201h 17Rating Descending187: SupergirlCleft chins, razzie awards, and being crushed to death by Peter O’Toole. This week Abigail and Michelle watched the 1984 Supergirl so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the quality of actors, terrible special effects, and bizarre storyline2021-10-131h 02Rating Descending188: Critters 3Tight soccer shirts, pure critterisms, and Titanic 2: The Wreckoning. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the third Critters film so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films lukewarm fear factor, schlocky performances, and its fun Leo DiCaprio cameo2021-10-0658 minRating Descending189: Look Who's Talking NowMetatextual dreams, trash men, and being a Santa Skeptic. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the third Looks Who’s Talking film so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the leading couples chemistry, the films tonal shift, and the lore of the LWT world2021-09-2946 minRating Descending190: The Next Karate KidSimilar haircuts, tiger-crouching over cars, and manic pixie dream boys. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the fourth Karate Kid instalment so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films leading lady, shoddy dialogue, and touching moments2021-09-2251 minRating Descending191: Species IIDrive-thru brothels, scrotum coding, and a new anti-titling campaign. This week Abigail and Michelle watched Species 2 so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films practical effects, terrible special effects, and silly performances2021-09-1553 minRating Descending192: Nutty Professor II: The KlumpsProsthetics, fart jokes, and becoming a giant monster hamster’s bitch. This week Michelle and Abigail watched this Eddie Murphy sequel so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films fatphobia, wholesome moments, and the star power of the two leads2021-09-0857 minRating Descending193: Jason XBlack boob leather, “Earth Two”, and sucking on so many levels. This week Abigail and Michelle watched the final Friday the 13th film so you don’t have to. They take a quick dive into the films Sci-Fi genre, fun ensemble of characters, and inventive deaths2021-09-0155 minRating Descending194: Kangaroo JackI am Jacky Legs and I’d like to say hello! This week Michelle and Abigail watched this Austramerican epic so you don’t have to! They touch on the films strange premise, lacklustre cast, and surreal pace2021-08-251h 03Rating Descending195: (Not) Baise-MoiSuh dude! This week Abigail and Michelle did not watch Baise-Moi because screw that. Instead they take a long dip into their five favourite comfort films, formative memories of their local video store, and the much-needed escapism of great cinema2021-08-1852 minRating Descending196: xXx: State of the UnionFudging cool funky gadgets, Hot Ham Man, and bringing a gun to a gun fight. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the xXx sequel so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films leading man, bizarre plot, and silly action sequences2021-08-1152 minRating Descending197: Ultraviolet (with Shane Anderson)“What am I DOING?” This week Abigail and Michelle, joined by guest star and filmmaker Shane Anderson, watched this cult movie so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the cheesey dialogue, infamous fight scenes, and unapproachable plot2021-08-041h 10Rating DescendingBonus: Twilight Saga: EclipseConfederate gold, wolves in jorts, and having a bad 'tude. This week Michelle and Abigail voluntarily watched the third Twilight film so you don't have to! They take a quick dive into the films plotholes, vacant performances, and the eternal Edward vs Jacob feud2021-07-2957 minRating Descending198: ZoomVibrating fingers, Rainblow, and high Smash Mouth ratios. This week Michelle and Abigail watched another 2006 Tim Allen film so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films cast, montage sequences, and confusing battle scenes2021-07-2843 minRating Descending199: The Shaggy DogTim Allen - republican and great to chat to. This week Abigail and Michelle watched this family comedy remake so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films cast, bloated plot, and memorable moments2021-07-2148 minRating Descending200: Little ManBeing the ugly one, hating on Batfink, and just wanting to be a dad. This week Michelle and Abigail watched this Wayans Brothers "comedy" so you don't have to! They take a quick dive into the films snail-like pace, trippy CGI, and confused tone2021-07-1444 minRating Descending201: Bitch SlapTight skirts, water fights, and ram-riding show tits asunder. This week, for their 50th episode, Abigail and Michelle watched Bitch Slap so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films iconic dialogue, flashy direction, and melodramatic performances2021-07-0746 minRating Descending202: Big Momma's: Like Father Like SonSinging a song and going absolutely feral. This week Michelle and Abigail watched the final Big Momma film so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films audio issues, Razzie performances, and trope-ridden plot2021-06-3045 minRating Descending203: The Human Centipede (First Sequence)Herbie vs Brum, Gordon Ramsey hand performances, and How Shit Works™️. This week Abigail and Michelle watched the first film of the Human Centipede trilogy so you don’t have to! They take a long look into male directors mishandling gore, violence, and sexuality2021-06-2353 minRating Descending204: SkylineFugly Or Not? You decide! This week Michelle and Abigail watched another Strause Brothers disaster so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films dramatic performances, incompetent directors, and yonic alien presence2021-06-1654 minRating Descending205: LOLAggressive cobbers, absorbing cottonballs, and little rabbit boys. This week Abigail and Michelle watched this 2012 coming of age film so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films blurred theme, directing style, and Miley’s performance2021-06-0953 minRating Descending206: SetupAre you giggle intolerant and need your films chuckle free? This week Michelle and Abigail watched Setup so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films confusing direction, tonal inconsistencies, and outlandishly terrible performances2021-06-0253 minRating Descending207: The DarknessGetting a little chocolate and a boiled water. This week Michelle and Abigail (guest starring Casserole) watched this dismal horror movie so you don't have to! They take quick dive into the films terrible performances, strange insight into eating disorders, and concerning tropes surrounding autism2021-05-2646 minRating Descending208: GetawayWas Ethan Hawke the Gunman on the Grassy Knoll? Find out as this week Michelle and Abigail watch this 2013 action film so you don’t have to! They take a quick dive into the films bad performances, flashing editing, and incomprehensible plot2021-05-1954 minRating Descending209: Paul Blart Mall Cop 2Vibrating forks, assaulting birds, and getting pearl necklaced by ice cream. This week Abigail and Michelle watched the Paul Blart Mall Cop sequel so you don't have to! This take a quick dive into the films fatphobia, misogyny, and plot holes2021-05-1248 minRating Descending210: God's Not Dead 2God's not dead, he's surely alive! This week Michelle and Abigail watched this ~highly anticipated~ sequel so you don't have to! They take a quick dive into the films absolute delusion, bigotry, and sheer fucking gall2021-05-0548 min