Shows
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#144 - The Secret Power of Changing the Venue in Your Friendship: May ChallengeWhether you’re hoping to upgrade a casual acquaintance, breathe life into a longstanding friendship, or accommodate a friend whose season of life recently shifted, a venue swap can work magic without big declarations or heavy planning.Welcome to the Dear Nina Friendship Challenge for May: Pick a newer friend or an old friend you'd like to feel closer to and initiate a change in where (or how) you hang out.Do you normally text, but never talk on the phone? Try a call! Do you walk once in awhile, but never go out for lu...2025-05-0112 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#143 - The Law of Rejection in Friendships with Harlan CohenIn this powerful episode of Dear Nina, I am joined by bestselling author Harlan Cohen to explore the truth about rejection, risk, and the myths we carry into adulthood about what friendship “should” look like. We dive into the Law of Rejection—a concept that can radically shift how you approach your relationships. Whether you're 18 or 88, accepting that we cannot control how others respond to our desire for friendship will serve you well. Friendship requires some risks, and knowing that rejection comes with the territory will allow you to take those risks.Whether you're always...2025-04-2141 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#141 - The White Lotus Friendship Trio: Lessons for Your Real-Life Friendships: Rebekah JacobsIt's a very special episode of Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship dedicated to the much-discussed and debated friendship triangle in White Lotus Season 3 created by Mike White.The friendship trio of Jaclyn, Kate, and Laurie has captivated TV viewers for the last two months. Similarly, Rebekah Jacobs (Dear Nina's assistant producer) and I have been texting and talking between episodes. Now that the season finale has aired, we shared all the lessons we think Jaclyn, Kate, and Laurie imparted on the world. Even their mistakes gave us plenty of friendship advice to ponder.2025-04-0840 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#140 - Celebrating Friends' Birthdays and Your Own Birthday: April ChallengeThe Dear Nina Friendship Challenge for April is about the sometimes tricky topic of friends' birthdays. The challenge itself is simple and the easiest so far in 2025. I'm encouraging listeners to actively seek out friends' birthdays so you don't have to rely on social media to know the date. Of course the next step is to acknowledge friends on their birthdays, again not only relying solely social media. The rest of the episode explores the emotional complexities surrounding birthdays, comparing how other friends' birthdays get celebrated, and why I believe in planning your own parties. Wh...2025-04-0414 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#139 - How to Start a Podcast: An introductionWelcome to Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship. I'm your host, Nina Badzin. I've been writing about friendship for over 10 years and podcasting about it for almost four. This episode on how to start a podcast might not be for you. So, send it to your friend who has been thinking about starting a podcast! I break down the process, explaining each aspect from concept, podcast art, music, format, equipment, recording, editing, hosting your episodes, marketing, realistic expectations for your friends' interest, realistic exceptions for how much a guest will share. All in less than 35 minutes! ...2025-03-3132 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#137 - Find Your Walking Friends (encore with Leslie Hooton)Many of us enjoy walking with friends for the mental and physical benefits (or could consider starting with the Dear Nina 2025 friendship challenge). However, the power of walking with friends is EXTRA inspiring in today’s episode.Leslie Hooton had to learn to walk multiple times throughout her life because of a stroke she had when she was born and numerous surgeries she's endured since. Leslie shares how neighborhood friends each took an assigned day when her beloved gym closed so that Leslie's muscles would get the essential movement necessary to keep her on her feet and he...2025-03-1723 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#136 - Your Three to Five Closest Friends (Letter Spotlight) with Rebekah JacobsWhat if you have lots of friends, but nobody feels like your special confidante or the person who would have your back no matter what? The newest letter spotlight episode comes from a listener who signed off as "Too Many Fish in the Sea." She feels lucky to have cultivated a wide community and plenty of friends, but she doesn't feel like she has super close friends.Joining me to answer the letter is my assistant producer, Rebekah Jacobs. Rebekah has been working with me for a while, but I wanted to get her on the mic...2025-03-1027 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#135 - The Hyperlocal Friendship ChallengeThere are local friends and there are “HYPERLOCAL” friends. This month in the Dear Nina community, we’re focusing on hyperlocal friendships—developing new ones and maintaining the ones you already have in your life. I introduce the March friendship challenge in this episode, which of course you can start any day of ANY MONTH. The challenge this month focuses on hyperlocal friendships, emphasizing the significance of proximity in building connections. I share some personal anecdotes and practical tips for engaging with friends in your neighborhood or at least nearby. I’m encouraging listeners to take actiona...2025-03-0319 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#134 - Fandom and the Potential for Friendship: with SC PerotMAKING FRIENDS IN A FANDOM COMMUNITYFandom, especially very enthusiastic fandom, can provide community, belonging, and friendship. In episode #134 of Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship, I'm joined by Vanderbilt professor, lawyer, author, and joy enthusiast, SC Perot, who shares her story of rediscovering joy after a devastating divorce, highlighting how her newfound interest in Harry Styles and the community surrounding his concerts provided a much-needed escape and a way to connect with people who wanted to discuss something other than divorce. A formerly-casual fan of Harry Styles, SC ended up attending 17 Harry Styles concerts in five countries!2025-02-2437 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#132 - The 4 Types of Connection: with Dr. Adam DorsayWhile friendship is an essential type of connection at every age and the one area of personal growth I discuss most often on Dear Nina, today’s guest, psychologist Dr. Adam Dorsay, expands the conversation to the four types of connections we need to lead fulfilling lives. Those four areas are: connection to ourselves, to others, to the world, and to something greater. Dr. Adam, author of Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love, shares the FEED model for enhancing connection. We also talk about the consequences of dis...2025-02-1033 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#130 - The Sober Curious Lifestyle and the Impact on Your Friendships: with Hallie SawyerDo you know someone who has adopted a "sober curious" lifestyle? Perhaps it's a pivot you've been considering for yourself? The term is usually credited to Ruby Warrington, author of Sober Curious: The Blissful Sleep, Greater Focus, Limitless Presence, and Deep Connection Awaiting Us All on the Other Side of Alcohol.“Sober curious” means you're curious about how much you're drinking and how your health, relationships, and work and more might change without alcohol, even if you don't have an addiction.Today's guest, writer and podcaster, Hallie Sawyer, began a sober curious journey several years ago...2025-01-2828 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#126 - Is It Time For a Friendship Cleanse? (encore with Anna Goldfarb)Welcome to the top episode on Dear Nina in 2024—the 14-day friendship cleanse, brainchild Anna Goldfarb whose book, Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections, is a must read for anyone looking to improve their friendships. Don't feel put off by the word, "cleanse." This discussion is about reconsidering how you're approaching friendships and how you're treating your closest friends. (And that particular list shouldn't be too long.)By the end of this episode, you will have a healthier mindset for thinking through your friendships, and you'll know why I became friends with Anna after he...2024-12-2634 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#125 - The 10% Rule in Friendship and The Negativity Bias with Ann ImigWhy does the inner judge in our brains automatically default to negativity? We assume the worst and let our insecurities lead the way. How does this inner judge interfere with our friendships? And what can we do to create curiosity instead of negativity?Ann Imig, creator and author of LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHER, and life coach at Listen Life Coaching, is here with practical tools that will help keep the judge at bay. Ann encourages "curiosity, celebrating, and savoring" in our friendships, "showing up when you show up," and utilizing the words and mindset...2024-12-1935 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#120 - Six Ways to be More Generous in Your Friendships with Emma NadlerBeing generous in our friendships makes us better friends and keeps solid friends in our lives. We're not talking about money here! To quote this week's guest, relationship-based therapist and author, Emma Nadler, "When we act more generously we feel better. So there's a lot in it for you, too." We discussed Emma's top five ways to be a more generous friend, and I added one of mine to the list. So yes, in 29 minutes you're getting SIX ways to be more generous in your friendships, which research links to a happier, more fulfilling life. 2024-11-1329 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#118 - Navigating Friendship Struggles Through Social Prescribing with Julia Hotz"Social" prescriptions from your doctor? Yes! What if for the sake of our mental and physical health doctors wrote prescriptions for cycling groups, fishing clubs, or volunteer positions on a farm? Those are real scenarios in Julia Hotz's THE CONNECTION CURE: The Prescriptive Power of Movement, Nature, Art, Service and Belonging, "the first book exploring the science, stories, and spread of social prescribing."In today's episode, a perfect follow-up to last week's episode on the importance of hobbies for the empty nest and retirement, Julia and I discussed these activity-based and creative "medical" solutions to the post-30...2024-10-3032 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#111 - The Friend Who Never Asks About You: Letter SpotlightIt's another letter spotlight episode! This week's anonymous letter is from a woman with two friends who never ask about her. She's fed up doing all the listening and none of the talking. She wants to know how to handle this friendship dynamic and whether other Dear Nina listeners deal with this same issue. Let us know in our facebook group, Dear Nina: The Group.In The Letter Spotlight series I'll be reading one anonymous letter from my inbox every six weeks or so and sharing my answer. Last month's letter was about issues...2024-09-0612 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#107 - Friendships Between Sisters-in-law (and roommates, cousins, and neighbors)I rarely cover family relationships on Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship, but I consistently receive letters about sisters-in-law so I realized it was time to broach the topic.Let me first say, I have a wonderful relationship with my sisters-in-law. I'm lucky! I was still able to take what I know about getting along (or not) with friends and relate it to the sister-in-law problem that listeners and readers keep writing to me about. In this new series, The Letter Spotlight, I'll be sharing one letter every six weeks o...2024-08-0418 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#104 - Brain Cancer, Friendship, and the Scary Mommy Blogging Days with Jill SmoklerJill Smokler is the creator of Scary Mommy, one of the most original and successful mom blogs ever. She was also the first mom blogger to sell her site to a major media company. But Dear Nina is not a business podcast, and this is not a discussion about business regrets or rebranding. Jill was recently diagnosed with brain cancer. And since Jill is also my real-life friend from college, this episode is personal.Jill and I had a candid conversation about her diagnosis, her decision to step away from her post-Scary Mommy work...2024-07-1734 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#101 - Best Friends, Friendship Trios, Being More Direct with Friends, and MoreIt's the first official "ask me anything" episode in honor of 100 episodes!The questions came from my anonymous inbox, my Facebook group (Dear Nina: The Group), or through Instagram and TikTok-- both @dearninafriendship.I had a great time answering questions and I couldn't even get to everything so I will keep doing these every so often.Some of the topics I covered in under 30 minutes:Be more direct with friendsAwkwardness after ending a friendshipFriendship trios, rectanglesLetting friends hangout without youDon’t assume friends operate like you do...2024-06-2127 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#100 - The Magic of Camp Friends with Dara LevanThey say camp friends are the best friends. Why? At camp there are no screens, you take risks, parents aren't breathing down your back, and the magic ingredients of endless hours + constant proximity make it possible to create intense, close bonds with kids your age.In this special episode of Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship, I have voicemails from campers and former campers ages 15-50, and I have a fantastic in-depth discussion about the highs (and lows) of camp friendships with author, Dara Levan, whose new novel, It Could Be Worse, features an important...2024-06-1340 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#99 - The 14-Day Friendship (Mindset) Cleanse with Anna GoldfarbWelcome to the 14-day friendship (mindset) cleanse, brainchild of previous Dear Nina guest, Anna Goldfarb, whose book Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections, is finally out in the world. Don't feel put off by the word, "cleanse." This discussion is about reconsidering how you're approaching friendships and how you're treating your closest friends. (And that particular list shouldn't be too long.)By the end of this episode, you will have a healthier frame for thinking through your friendships, and you'll know why I became friends with Anna after her visit to t...2024-06-0433 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#97 - Disclosing My Invisible Disability Increased the Intimacy In My Friendships with Estelle ErasmusInvisible disabilities can turn into a source of shame and unknowingly get in the way of friendships. What is an invisible disability? It's any condition that is not obvious, perhaps even to the closest of friends. Some examples are depression, anxiety, other mental health diagnoses, as well as physical conditions such as chronic pain, fatigue, and too many other examples to list where symptoms are felt but not seen.This week's guest, Estelle Erasmus, shares her experience with genetic hearing loss that began in her 20s and stayed a secret long after she started wearing hearing aids...2024-05-1925 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#96 - Mixtapes, Mahjong, and Other Sensory Friendship Experiences (encore with Gretchen Rubin)I have been a Gretchen Rubin fan since 2009 when I read The Happiness Project the week it came out. Who could resist that cover and concept? And I cannot believe this, but I got to discuss my favorite topic, friendship, with Gretchen Rubin on Dear Nina.In celebration of Gretchen's paperback release of Life in Five Senses: How Exploring the Senses Got Me Out of My Head and Into the World, I am replaying our episode from about a year ago. I found my favorite parts of the episode and put it together. 2024-05-1047 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#93 - Handling Small Friendship Slights and Changing Your Instagram HandleA quick conversation about the subtle hurts that can make friendship difficult. It's the small slights I cover on Dear Nina in general, not the giant betrayals.Why? The big "stuff" is much more black and white, and we don't need much conversation around whether to stay friends.Today I also have a big instagram tip if you're looking to change your Instagram handle. I changed mine to @dearninafriendship. Instagram doesn't make it all that simple if you have tons of links in the world leading to your old handle (which I do). I explain...2024-04-1108 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#80 - Neediness in Friendships with Sally Vardaman"Neediness" has come up in plenty of episodes, but this is the first one dedicated to that loaded word. The episode was inspired by a letter from a listener--author, Sally Vardaman, who found herself reacting to my mom's story in episode #72 about her decision to end a friendship over what she called, "neediness." Sally's letter was so reflective and insightful that I asked her to come on the show.We covered: feeling drained by a friend's needs.worrying you're overtaxing friends with your needs.eliminating the shame of having needs in the first p...2023-12-1129 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#78 - Pursuing a New Friend and Texting Etiquette with Stephanie Goldstein and Rachel Levy LesserYou feel good potential friendship chemistry with someone, but then what to do next? This is an episode about pursuing a new friend. (We also get into some texting etiquette.)How do you pursue the friendship in a way that lets the other person know you're interested, but doesn't scare them off? And if you're someone who already has a full social life, how do you make time for a new friend? And why should you make time for a new friend?We also discussed some texting etiquette such as when to employ the thumbs up...2023-11-1330 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#77 - Loneliness and Male Friendship with Gabe MollicaIf there's one thing we need these days, it's some joy and laughter. It's dark times. And while today's story of a heartbreak from a friendship breakup isn't exactly what we think of as funny on its own, I am thrilled to tell you that there is a fantastic comedian out there who has made humor and art out of a painful friendship breakup he had in college.Gabe Mollica's one-man show is called Solo: A Show About Friendship. How could I not feature it on Dear Nina? If you're a fan o...2023-10-3121 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#76 - Yes, Reach Out to Your Friends During a CrisisThis episode of Dear Nina focuses on reaching out amidst turmoil (this time in particular, in the Middle East), navigating conversations when you’re not sure what to say, and the profound impact of letting someone know you’re thinking of them.Questions discussed include: Can a simple message of love and support make a difference to a friend during a crisis?Is it fair to expect friends to post on social media? At what point do you let friends know you're disappointment they didn't reach out?How do you handle it when you se...2023-10-1818 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#74 - The Childhood Friendships that Shaped Our Identities with Kristin NilsenHave you ever stopped to acknowledge the profound impact of your childhood friendships, even the most casual and fleeting ones, on your adult identity? This episode is dedicated to the friends who touched our lives, even if they are no longer an active part of it. Walk down memory lane with Kristin Nilsen, a middle-grade fiction writer and co-host of The Pop Culture Preservation Society Podcast, as we scrutinize our early social interactions and their lasting influence. We acknowledge the importance of these friendships, even those that were temporary, and appreciate the roles they p...2023-09-2731 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#70 - Become Your Own Social Director: Stop Waiting for InvitationsEver feel like your social life is a waiting game, stuck in the perpetual hope for an invitation to hang out? It’s time to flip the script! This episode is about empowering you to take control of your social time and friendships.Don't wait around hoping to be invited--reach out, take the lead, and discover the joy that comes with being the planner. It's a super power!This is the perfect episode for a new school year, or a new season of friendship for ALL AGES from kids to...2023-08-2421 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#65 - Big Friend Groups and Accepting Teen Friendship Strife with Dr. Lisa DamourDr. Lisa Damour is the NYT bestselling author of Untangled, Under Pressure, The Emotional Lives of Teenagers, and the co-host of the Ask Lisa Podcast. On Dear Nina, I focus on adult friendships, but sometimes I touch on teen friendships because teen friend strife is slipping into adult friendships. While it was once expected that teens would experience friendship changes as part of growing up, it now seems making sure teens never feel upset about their social lives is another thing for parents to manage. Lisa's work helps adults understand how much distress to expect in teens' lives and w...2023-07-2024 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#62 - The Power of Friendship with Weekly Walking Partners with Leslie Hooton"Monday is Nan. Tuesday is Maryanne. Wednesday is Leslie. Thursday is Lisa. And Friday is Susan. It was an act of love, an act of friendship. . . "Many of us enjoy walking with friends. But the power of walking and friendship is extra inspiring in today's episode. Leslie Hooton, author of three novels and a true inspiration, had to learn to walk multiple times throughout her life because of a stroke she had when she was born and numerous surgeries she's endured since. In this heartwarming episode, Leslie shares how friends each took an assigned d...2023-06-2920 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#61 - The Case For Phone Calls and Low-key Hangs With Friends with Jo PiazzaAward-winning journalist, best-selling author, and podcast creator, Jo Piazza, joins me to answer the question---Is texting ruining the art of friendship communication? Together we make the case for old-school phone calls and low-key hangs.We referenced two of Jo's Substack pieces:In Praise of the Low-keyHangI Don't Want to Text AnymoreMeet Jo PiazzaJJo Piazza is a bestselling author, podcast creator, and award-winning journalist. She is the bestselling author of many critically acclaimed novels and nonfiction books including We Are Not Like Them, Charlotte Walsh Likes...2023-06-2221 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#60 - College Friends in the 90s and the Potential of Current Campus Friendships with Daisy Alpert FlorinCollege friendships! Daisy Alpert Florin, author of My Last Innocent Year, joins me to discuss the unparalleled intimacy of college friendships. We delve into the impact of choosing the right college environment, as well as how the lack of technology (in the 90s) and the abundance of time led to more meaningful connections. Don't miss this nostalgia-filled episode as Daisy and I analyze how and why college friendships can have lasting influence for the rest of our lives. Meet Daisy Alpert FlorinDaisy attended Dartmouth College and received graduate degrees from Columbia Un...2023-06-1527 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#59 - Parent Involvement in Teen Friendship Issues with Stephanie SprengerHow can we help our teens navigate the complexities of friendships without projecting our own experiences, desires, or traumas onto them? What level of parent involvement is appropriate?In this thought-provoking episode, I spoke to the insightful Stephanie Sprenger to explore the delicate art of guiding our children through the messy world of friendships while recognizing when our own feelings and experiences might be hindering their growth and learning. As parents, we might struggle to find the right balance between protecting our kids and allowing them to learn from their own mistakes. We also...2023-06-0836 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#58 - Mahjong, Poker, and Becoming Closer Friends Through a Game with Mark OppenheimerThere is tremendous value to poker, mahjong, and other games for making friends and getting closer with the friends you already have.I’m a longtime fan today's guest, author and podcaster, Mark Oppenheimer, who spoke with me about the value of participating in a regular game with friends. In Mark's case, he has a longstanding poker game. I talked about mahjong. Bridge was a big part of my parents' social lives. There is something about a game with a regular group of players that is different from other ways we get together with friends. I'm excited th...2023-06-0130 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#57 - Listen for What’s Not Being Said and Other Friendship Solutions From the Five Senses with Gretchen RubinGretchen Rubin and I spoke about her newest book, Life in Five Senses, and specifically about how awareness of the five senses can improve our friendships.We covered examples such as listening better for what’s being said and not being said, making plans to see new sights with friends, paying attention to where our eyes are focused (not on our phones and Apple watches), hugging friends (a challenge for me!), taste experiments, leaning into nostalgia through discussing memories of smells and tastes, the perfect sense experience of the mixtape, why my husband Bryan is...2023-05-2546 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#56 - The Problems and Potential of Group Texts (encore with Kat Vellos)I’m revisiting the problems and potential of group texts (but mostly the problems) because there are still some group text shenanigans I’d love to see go away. I want us to love our group chats with friends! We CAN improve! In this episode you will get some easy ways to make the group texting experience better.I’m SO excited for even more listeners to hear Kat Vellos, who helped me navigate the world of group texts and all the friendship issues and potential that come along with them.M...2023-05-1836 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#55 - How to Support a Friend Facing an Ambiguous Loss with Emma NadlerOne afternoon Emma Nadler gets a call from her daughter's doctor that changes her life forever. Faced with the realities of raising a child with a rare genetic condition, Nadler must confront her preconceptions of motherhood and her perfectionistic beliefs."Today we’re talking about how to support friends facing an ambiguous loss. My guest, Emma Nadler, is a psychotherapist in Minneapolis and the author of The Unlikely Village of Eden, briefly summarized in the words above. Emma’s incredible memoir is about grief, healing, marriage, friendship, and so much more. Our discussion doesn’t requir...2023-05-1126 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#54 - Text Your Friends Back with Laura TremaineOne of Laura Tremaine's friendship philosophies is to put connection and relationship on your daily to-do list. And one example of a "to-do" we discussed was this: TEXT YOUR FRIENDS BACK! This came up for Laura after a few friends called her out.After realizing some of her communication mishaps and a few other friendship details were falling between the cracks or hurting friends' feelings, Laura solved the problem by putting her friendship goals and intentions on a daily to-do list. She has her family to-do list, her work to-do list, and her friendship...2023-05-0432 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#53 - It's Never Too Late to Make New Friends with Megan TamteEvereve's co-founder and co-CEO, Megan Tamte, joins me to discuss making new, very close friends later in life. And by later, we mean any time in adult life. We talked about how to reach out to potential friends, how to hear "no," how to say "no," reaching out to old friends, and real friends vs. deal friends. Megan also gave me some emergency fashion advice at the end.I recently saw a story on the Today Show about two women who traveled around the world together. They promised they would do this for their 80th birthdays. While...2023-04-2730 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#52 - Choosing a New Expat Life After a Tragedy with Jen ZwinckToday on Dear Nina I have a guest with a harrowing and inspiring story to share about starting a new life with new friends after a horrific tragedy. This is unlike any story I've heard firsthand, and I'm grateful for Jen's candor and honesty.Jen Zwinck wrote to me:After my husband was killed, I moved with my daughter to a small island in the Caribbean where I didn't know a single person. I went there to heal. What surprised me was the friendships that I formed while I was there, these...2023-04-1933 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#51 - How to Recognize a Toxic Friendship with Michelle Anderson and Lauren MassarellaFirst thing to know, not all friendships with issues are "toxic." I'm not sure there's a more overused word on the internet. That said, it's something we need to discuss on a friendship podcast. Recognizing a toxic friendship and what to do about it sounds like a serious thing to discuss. And it is! But my two guests are so fun and delightful that you could almost forget how unhappy these kinds of friendships can make people. Get ready for a lot of Midwestern accents on this episode, starting with mine. Then add Michelle Anderson and Lauren Massarella from...2023-04-1030 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#50 - How Friendship Changes With Age and Overlooking Foibles (with my mom)I'm thrilled to welcome my mom back to Dear Nina. My mom, Kathy Sackheim, has been an instrumental part of the Dear Nina friendship universe. I quote her often in the column and the podcast. In this 20-minute episode she answered some questions that came in from the Dear Nina Facebook group. We covered the ways she's seen attitudes about friendship change through the decades, whether parents and kids can be friends, whether parents should get involved in teens' friendship issues, handling other parents' opinions of us, letting go of trying to control your older kids as they leave...2023-04-0319 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#49 - Unexpected Friends and the Key to Long-term Friendship with Will SchwalbeAuthor, Will Schwalbe, joins the show today with some of these thoughts and more: It's better to say something than nothing. Make the hard phone call. Donate to the cause. Let friends help you. Ask questions. Look past what you think you know about people. Assume the best. These are all keys to long-term friendship I discussed with Will, author of We Should Not Be Friends: The Story of a Friendship.The first part of the episode is a natural continuation of last week's episode about the benefit of having friends with different points of view and...2023-03-2737 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#48 - Friendship Despite Philosophical (or other) Disagreements with Chaya Leah Sufrin and Yael Bar TurThere is so much value to having friends with different points of view and backgrounds. I love witnessing a friendship between people whose differences should make their connection unlikely, but instead their ability to discuss their experiences leads to greater understanding and closeness. Challenge and disagreement can be an enriching aspect of a friendship rather than something to avoid at all costs. It's not about convincing the next person; it's about diversity of experience and opinion in your life. My guests are the hosts of the Ask a Jew podcast and writers of a Su...2023-03-1932 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About FriendshipBonus: Friendship Mistakes on She's Got IssuesIn an episode with Jill Smokler, formally THE Scary Mommy of the famous Scary Mommy, and currently the host of the podcast, She's Got Issues, you’re going to hear about the most common mistakes people make in friendships, and the hard learned lessons. You will also hear an all around honest chat between old college friends and some regrets from that time. Jill and I went to WashU together! She's been kind of enough to now have me on her show for a second time.We covered lots of friendship issues in just un...2023-03-1304 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#47 - Friendship Triangles, Envy, Competition, and Ghosting with Christie TateI have author, Christie Tate, back on the show! I have been so eager for this conversation. We are talking about Christie's newest memoir, B.F.F.: A Memoir of Friendship Lost and Found. We're focusing on friendship triangles, envy, jealousy, competition, and ghosting--all issues that come up in the book.You might know Christie as the author of the fantastic memoir Group: How One Therapist and a Circle of Strangers Saved My Life. It was a New York Times bestseller and a Reese Witherspoon book club pick. You might know her from a previous episode of th...2023-03-0633 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#46 - The Importance of Casual Friendships with Shari LeidThis week's episode with guest, Shari Leid, focuses on wisdom she’s gained after meeting with 144 of her friends. Our episode makes the case for the casual friendship. We also talked about expanding your friendship network by putting yourself out there to connect with new and old friends, giving friends grace, having intentional conversations to deepen friendships, and considering whether your "bar for entry” to friendship is too high.Meet Guest, Shari LeidFormer litigator, Shari Leid, currently operates An Imperfectly Perfect Life, LLC, a professional mindset coaching business prim...2023-02-2725 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#45 - Learning From Our Parents' Friendships with Linda PressmanDo your adult friendships mirror what you saw growing up in your household, or did you set out to do the exact opposite in your adult social life? I spoke to author, Linda Pressman, about her experiences growing up as the child of Holocaust survivors, her parents' friends, and her own adult take on friendship.Meet Linda PressmanLinda Pressman is the author of the recently published memoir, Jewish Girls Gone Wild. Her previous memoir, Looking Up: A Memoir of Sisters, Survivors and Skokie won the Grand Prize in the Writer’s Di...2023-02-1328 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#44 - How Diet Culture Complicates Friendships with Pam MooreThe topic of diet culture and friendship inspired more emails from my Facebook group--Dear Nina: The Group--than any other topic since I started the podcast. What do I mean by diet culture and friendship? I'm referring to how the culture of dieting and the worship of thinness affects friendships, can become competitive, and is spread among friends. We also discussed friends being overly invested in and overly influenced by each other's decisions about food.Pam Moore is an occupational therapist-turned-intuitive eating coach and health and fitness journalist. As an intuitive eating coach, her mission i...2023-01-3034 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#43 - Navigating Money and Friendship: It's tricky! with Mia BrabhamDo you overspend to keep up with friends? It's tricky to navigate conversations about money with friends. What issues have come up for you about money and friendship? Does splitting things get tense? Planning trips? Participating in expectations around weddings, showers, going in with friends for gifts? Money can be a big issue between friends. Some of the solutions discussed in the episode can apply to any topic that's normally private and therefore tough to handle in friendship.Mia Brabham, staff writer at Shondaland.com, and I discussed some ways to make dealing with...2023-01-1624 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#42 - Which Friendships Do You Enjoy the Most and Why?Taking time to identify the friendships that are going well in your life and WHY is a worthwhile activity. It's my January challenge for listeners, readers, and for the Dear Nina Facebook group. This is one of my more personal episodes. Thanks for being here!Here is the 7-day happiness challenge from the New York Times mentioned in the episode.The challenge was inspired by the long study on happiness, all of which is compiled in the book The Good Life: Lessons from the World’s Longest Scientific Study of Happ...2023-01-0618 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#41 - Are We Work Friends, Real Friends, or Am I Her Customer? (with Lisa Harris)I spoke to narrative coach, Lisa Harris, about the sometimes-fuzzy lines between "work friends" and "real friends" and also the line people cross between friend and customer. In other words--treating your friends like your customers. Not a good idea!Meet Lisa Harris: Lisa Harris the CEO/founder of Lisa Harris & Company. Lisa’s entrepreneurial journey began in 2016 after publishing her book, Unveiled Beauty: Handwritten Stories From a Poetic Heart. She spent 18 years in executive leadership roles working for and with many Fortune 500 companies and nationally recognized brands. Today Lisa successfully guides women on their pe...2022-12-1920 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About FriendshipBonus: Jealousy of Tennis Friends, my Pom Pom Girl Regrets, and Time TravelI think this is the first time I've publicly discussed the bizarre memory of waiting up long into the night to see if I made the Pom Pom squad at Highland Park High School. Thank you to Rachel Levy Lesser and Stephanie Goldstein for inviting me on Life's Accessories, The Podcast to talk about the BIG mistake I made quitting the tennis team in high school, how a little bit of good old-fashioned friendship jealousy got me back into tennis, and why I love tennis people so much. ALL THE DEAR NINA LI...2022-12-1403 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#40 - Giving Thoughtful Gifts to FriendsEpisode #40: After discussing the topic of great gift ideas for friends in my Facebook group--Dear Nina: The Group--I heard such thoughtful examples that I wanted to share those ideas with listeners. There are some really creative gifts in this quick 10-minute episode. I also briefly discussed Anna Goldfarb's recent Atlantic article, "Gift-Giving is About the Buyer, Not the Receiver." Anna was a guest on episode 35 of Dear Nina.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to...2022-12-1111 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#39 - Do One New Thing Every Day to Make Friends with Pam LampEveryone tells me their city is the hardest city for making new friends. It's a common problem! I spoke to Pam Lamp who has a fun and helpful story about making new friends at 57-years-old when she moved to Nashville with her husband and had to rebuild her social life. Pam's story spoke to me because I often hear from listeners and readers who struggle to make new friends as an adult. I don't think people realize how much work and humility it takes. You truly have to take the initiative and not worry about being the one to...2022-11-2824 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#38 - What are Your Friendship Preferences and Limitations with Diana SpechlerI spoke to author Diana Spechler about a piece she wrote in her Substack called “How to Make Friends.” It was a refreshing take on making friends when moving to a new city and on friendship "deal breakers." What are your friendship preferences and limitations? Does repeated cancelling get to you? Is a friend who wants to talk several times a week asking for too much? Each of us has different "deal breakers." Outside of a significant breach of trust, there is no right and wrong here--just personal preferences. MEET DIANA SPECHLER2022-11-1334 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#37 - The Benefits of Couple Friends (with my husband)There are lots of benefits to having couple friends. My husband joined me as we reflected on why we have made such a big effort to maintain couple friendships throughout our 20+ year marriage and what we think it adds to our lives. We each have our own friends, but couple friendships have been important too. ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook g...2022-11-0115 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#36 - Widowhood and the Importance of Friendship (with my mom)My mom, Kathy Sackheim, joined me to discuss widowhood and friendship, as well as friendships while my dad was in the later years of Parkinson's Disease. I'm so grateful for my mom's honesty and advice. ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me or need another link? That’s probably here.2022-10-1620 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#35 - Lopsided Friendships with Anna GoldfarbJournalist, Anna Goldfarb, joins me to discuss managing a lopsided friendship— that feeling you’re putting more into the friendship than your friend is, and, maybe even being okay with it depending on the situation.The episode came about after reading Anna's article in vox.com called "How to Handle a Lopsided Friendship."Anna Goldfarb is the author of Modern Friendship and writes about friendships, relationships, and pop psychology for major publications. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, Vice, TIME, The Cut and more. She's the auth...2022-10-0225 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#34 - Reconnecting With an Ex-Friend (encore with Rebecca Kotok)It is possible to reconnect with an ex-friend and forget the issues that caused the breakup? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. But forgiveness is a necessary ingredient if you're even going to try. In this replay episode, I have a candid conversation with one of my best friends, Rebecca Kotok, who for about three years in our 20s, was my ex-best friend. We discuss why we stopped talking, and how and why we rekindled our friendship.Plus, Rebecca and I discuss two voicemails from listeners with their own forgiveness stories, one that worked well and...2022-09-2537 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#33 - When the Desire for Friendship is Not Equal with Ruchi KovalWhen the desire for friendship is not equal, things can get very tricky. My guest, the wise Ruchi Koval, is here to help. We talked about the reality of hurt feelings and disappointments in real friendships, and the question of whether every friendship needs to "fill your cup." It was a challenging letter from a listener and a challenging conversation overall. Meet Ruchi KovalRuchi is the co-founder and Associate Director of Congregation JFX, an innovative community in Cleveland, Ohio. She has been a Jewish educator for two decades, leading self-development groups for ad...2022-09-1825 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#32 - Conflict Can Strengthen a Friendship with Dr. Marisa FrancoDr. Marisa G. Franco, author of Platonic, and I talk about how expressing anger can strengthen a friendship. Dr. Franco also gives tips for how conflict between friends can have a win-win outcome. We talk about attachment theory in friendship and more."When someone brings up an issue with us, remember it as an act of love. They are giving us an opportunity to reconcile and to heal things. They're giving us enlightenment as to how we can do better as a friend. And that's gold. How rare do we get that in our...2022-09-0526 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#31 - Friends From Different Backgrounds with Julie Burton and Stephanie PierceToday we’re talking about being friends with people who are different from you. There have been a ton of articles on the topic lately because of a new study about cross-class friendships— just one kind of difference possible in a friendshipI of course could not tackle this topic alone, so I invited the fabulous friendship pair and podcast duo from HerNext Chapter, Stephanie Pierce and Julie Burton.I’ve seen tons of research over the years on the benefits for society as a whole when everyone isn’t exactly like their friends. This is also...2022-08-2232 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#30 - Loneliness Despite Having Close Friends with Mary Laura PhilpottAuthor, Mary Laura Philpott, joins me to discuss feeling loneliness and worry despite having close friends. Mary Laura Philpott is the nationally bestselling author of I Miss You When I Blink and of Bomb Shelter: Love, Time, and Other Explosives. She writes about the overlap of the absurd and the profound in everyday life. Her writing has been featured by The New York Times, The Washington Post, and The Atlantic, among many other publications. A former bookseller, she also hosted an interview program on Nashville Public Television for several years. Mary Laura lives in Nashville, Tennessee, with her family. 2022-08-0828 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#29 - Outgrowing a Friendship and Friends Who Do Not Root For You with Chaz SandiferChaz Sandifer joins me to discuss the reality of outgrowing friendships and friends who disappear in the good times but show up in bad times. "Over the course of 10 years, as I've grown as an entrepreneur, I realized there are people in your life who are there for a season, some people who are in our lives forever, and some who are there to teach a lesson and just for you to take the next step." ~ Chaz"'Must be nice' is not a compliment. 'Must be nice' is always full of jealousy or envy, which i...2022-07-2526 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#28 - Grieving the Death of a Friend with Zibby OwensThe one and only Zibby Owens joins me to talk about her memoir, Bookends, and her experiences grieving the death of three close friends.In her new book, Bookends: A Memoir of Love, Loss, and Literature, Zibby tells several story threads at the same time, all organized around the books Zibby was reading when events occurred. It starts as a personal family history of Zibby's grandparents rising in America, her own childhood, education, and career story. It's a motherhood story and a romance, too. But very central to this memoir is the tragedy of losing close friends t...2022-07-1129 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#27 - Teen Friend Groups and Friends Who Drift Away with Taryn KesselWe're tackling four friendship dilemmas from listeners in under 30 minutes. This time the topics circle around (mild) covid issues in friendships, the role of a best friend in adulthood, what happens when a teen's group is drifting away, and a listener whose friends keep walking away from the friendship. Thank you once again to Taryn Kessel for joining me!You can find the full show notes with the questionsHERE.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 This week’s fabulous sponsor + how to purchase ad space on Dear Nina📱 Su...2022-06-2725 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About FriendshipCovid Issues With Friends, Teen Groups, Friends Who Leave: Ep 27In episode 27 of Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship, my best friend, Taryn Kessel, and I once again tackle four questions in under 30 minutes. This time the topics circle around covid issues in friendships, the role of a best friend in adulthood, what happens when a teen's group is drifting away, and a person whose friends keep leaving.Join us in the Dear Nina Facebook group, Taryn is there too!You can find the show notes HERE.GET MY MONTHLY FRIENDSHIP-THEMED NEWSLETTER!Twitter @NinaBadzin2022-06-2725 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#26 - Making New Friends After 50 with Pop Culture Preservation SocietyYou want to make new friends, but worry it’s too late? Too hard? Too intimidating? You don’t know where to start? I believe it's never too late to make new friends, which is why I invited Carolyn Cochrane, Kristin Nilsen, and Michelle Newman of the Pop Culture Preservation Society Podcast to tell us how they become good friends in the last handful of years, what these new friendships have meant to them in a new stage of life, and what advice they have for others who want to bring new people into their orbits.The...2022-06-1334 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#25 - Improving Group Texts with Kat VellosLove them or hate them, you're probably in a group chat once in a while or even very regularly. Author, Kat Vellos, and I are navigating the world of group texts and all the friendship issues and potential that come along with them.Kat and I discuss the ideal uses for group chats, the less than ideal uses, and all the potential etiquette opportunities that could make our group chats more effective and enjoyable. I say opportunities because sometimes etiquette has a bad rap, but when done well, it can make communication better.2022-05-3135 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About FriendshipBonus: Analyzing Steel Magnolias With The Untitled Gen-X PodcastDid you love the movie Steel Magnolias in the 80s/early 90s? I did, but rewatching it recently brought up some thoughts I never would have had as a kid when I watched it MANY times.Instead of a regular Dear Nina episode this week, I’m directing you to a deep dive discussion I had with Lori at the The Untitled Gen-X Podcast. We left no stone of Steel Magnolias unturned, including the friendships it portrayed, like why did Julia Roberts' character have NO friends?! The Untitled Gen-X Podcast is an all around really fun...2022-05-2401 min
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship#24 - Boundaries Without Damaging Your Friendships (with my husband!)How to gracefully maintain boundaries and stop giving away too much information without damaging your friendships. This episode with my husband, Bryan, is a direct follow-up to the discussion I had in episode 23 when my guest and I spoke about kids' issues becoming too private to share with friends. I asked Bryan to share his advice for keeping information private because he's really good at connecting with people without feeling he has to overshare-- something I'm constantly working on improving. Many people agreed with me after listening to episode 23 that it's important to keep s...2022-05-1617 min