Shows
Riverdon't#42 Cheryl's New Grandfather (Riverdale 5x10)So much happened in Riverdale season 5 episode 10, "Chapter Eighty-Six: The Pincushion Man." Did they skip an episode? How did we get here? Prison breaks, palladium, hallucinogens, divorces, forest fires, the slow burn relationship of Nana Rose and Reggie finally coming to the forefront, incest weddings - well, not incest, but...closer to incest than the average wedding, maybe... Follow us on Twitter and TikTok @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2021-05-311h 13Riverdon't#41 How the Grinch Stole Riverdale (Riverdale 5x09)This week, we talk about Riverdale season 5 episode 9 "Chapter Eighty-Five: Destroyer." We play a quick game of Would You Rather before diving into our recap. A lot of this one is just us talking about the character Lerman Logan. And how much money does Veronica have to justify her spending habits? There's also some more epic highs and lows of high school football than usual. Follow us on Twitter and TikTok @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2021-05-171h 05Riverdon't#40 The Grumpies (Riverdale 5x08)In this podcast, we talk about Riverdale season 5 episode 8 "Chapter Eighty-Four: Lock and Key." We plan a BETTER Key Party, question why Nana Rose wasn't invited, wonder about the mechanics of kicking a door open in Riverdale (and call out the sound editors for the first time), and bring up a lot of dropped plot points.
2021-05-101h 08Riverdon't#39 A REAL Firefighter (Riverdale 5x07)We are BACK and we're talking about season 5 episode 7 of Riverdale, "Chapter Eighty-Three: Fire in the Sky." The gang splits up again to fight fires, coach cheerleaders, drain the swamp, create their own currency (?), and get abducted by aliens (??). Sometimes this really is the funniest show on television. Follow us on Twitter and Tiktok @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2021-04-271h 11Riverdon't#38 The Jingle & Jangle Vaccine (Riverdale 5x06)The gang goes Back 82 School in season 5 episode 6 of Riverdale, "Chapter Eighty-Two: Back to School," which means, yes, the epic highs and lows of high school football have returned (or have they?) We discuss this episode's cartoon villainy, introduction of a fun new storyline, and, unfortunately, karaoke night. Is anyone else hungry for some Doritos? Follow us on Twitter and TikTok @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2021-03-1752 min
Riverdo's and Riverdon'tsSeason 3: Episode 10: Tony Soprano's Gently Clapping Ass Cheeks Present: Rumplejailskin the Incarceration GoblinThis episode is wretched and deeply frustrating, but don't you worry-- the cast of Riverdo's and Riverdon'ts is ready to kick it into an entirely different gear to force entertainment into this non-entertainment-shaped aperture.
Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)
2021-03-041h 08Riverdon't#37 Samm With Two Ms (Riverdale 5x05)In this podcast, we're talking about season 5 episode 5 of Riverdale, "Chapter Eighty-One: The Hommecomming." We celebrate the return of the twins (as actual children! not infants!), discuss the gang's new career choices, question the bureaucratic processes of Riverdale, and express our enthusiasmm for our new favorite character and the spelling of his namme. Have you seen the pattern yet? We think it's funny. Follow us on Twitter and Tiktok @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2021-02-251h 05Riverdon't#36 The Scented Trash Bag Killer (STBK) (Riverdale 5x04)It's 7 years into the future in Riverdale (or...is it?) and we're here to talk about it. We discuss what has happened in the years since graduation, character by character, and talk about potential plot inconsistencies. Well, we think there's inconsistencies--we honestly have trouble remembering what actually happened in this show. But it's okay, so does the show itself. Follow us on Twitter and TikTok @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2021-02-161h 06Riverdon't#35 Archie Will Defeat ISISThe high school characters played by 20-something actors finally graduate. In this podcast, we discuss season 5 episode 3 of Riverdale, "Chapter Seventy-Nine: Graduation." We talk about some sweet moments, get confused about several plot points, dissect what we know about the time jump, and, most importantly, discuss how our wildest prediction from our very first podcast actually came true. Riverdale writers, if you're listening, we'd be happy to discuss receiving any financial compensation for providing you with storylines... Follow us on Twitter and TikTok @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com
2021-02-081h 01Riverdon't#34 The Dr. Curdle Jr. Podcast (Riverdale 5x02)Season 5 episode 2 of Riverdale "Chapter Seventy-Eight: The Preppy Murders" has a lot going on and we are here to unpack it. Archie miraculously is cured from his issues, Cheryl's mumsy takes care of their extended family, Veronica deals with her daddykins, and Betty and Jughead do a classic Scooby-Doo reveal of the most recent mystery. The body count is HIGH this episode... Follow us on Twitter and TikTok @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2021-02-031h 00Riverdon't#33 REGGIE DRUGS THE ENTIRE SCHOOL (Riverdale 5x01)Riverdale is back from its hiatus and so are we! In this episode, we discuss the season 5 premiere "Chapter Seventy-Seven: Climax" and we give our predictions about what we think will happen this season. We talk about Archie's relationships, the voyeur's name change, the unexpected return to our favorite prison, our new favorite character, and the awkward crossover with Katy Keene's KO Keller--I mean Kelly. Follow us on Twitter and TikTok @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2021-02-011h 102020-09-211h 15Riverdon't#31 R-chie (Riverdale 1x07)This week we review Riverdale Season 1 Episode 7, "Chapter 7: In a Lonely Place." Did you also think this episode was.. really not that bad? Word gets out about Polly's pregnancy, Riverdale has a lit nightclub, and we learn more about FP's mysterious dynamic. Plus Veronica and R-chie both get new roommates! Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email what Riverdale plushie you'd want to riverdont@gmail.com!Article about Marisol Nichols: https://www.marieclaire.com/culture/a32320089/marisol-nichols-undercover-child-predator-sting/
2020-09-071h 10Riverdon't#30 Reggie's Heckling (Riverdale 1x06)It's time for the variety show in Riverdale season 1 episode 6, "Chapter 6: Faster, Pussycats! Kill! Kill!" Archie, Veronica, and the Pussycats deal with the drama of their parents and the performing arts while Betty and Jughead get down to serious business involving the murder. This is the first appearance of Polly! Also, this is the first appearance of Riverdale's obvious ads! Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-08-171h 10Riverdon't#29 Archie's Afternoon-long Montage (Riverdale 1x05)This week, we review Riverdale Season 1 Episode 5, "Chapter 5: Heart of Darkness." The Blossoms hold a memorial service for Jason with too many questionable costume choices, Betty learns more secrets about her sister, and Archie hurts his playing hand (you know which one). Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-08-101h 23Riverdon't#28 Loud Serpents (Riverdale 1x04)Listen in as we review Riverdale Season 1 Episode 4, "Chapter 4: The Last Picture Show." The movie drive thru is closing, Archie and Grundy's relationships spirals, and we meet some really noisy, but otherwise harmless, Serpents! Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email what Riverdale plushie you'd want to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-08-031h 03Riverdon't#27 Dilton Doiley's Birthday (Riverdale 1x03)This week, we watched Riverdale Season 1 Episode 3, "Chapter 3: Body Double" and we certainly uncovered the true meaning behind that title - you won't want to miss it! We see some slut shaming, an episode of psychotic dissociative identify (casual), Jughead finally has a platform for his murder investigation, and something about Archie and his music career (whatever). Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-06-161h 17Riverdon't#26 Twin Pedicures (Riverdale 1x02)In this week's podcast, we talk about important Riverdale news and rewatch Riverdale Season 1 Episode 2, "Chapter Two: Touch of Evil." Friendships are challenged, Ms. Grundy is manipulative, we get introduced to new characters (some with GREAT names), and, oh yeah, we get some new crumbs of information about Jason Blossom's murder. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-06-081h 04Riverdon't#25 Cringe O'Clock (Riverdale 1x01)Riverdale may be on hiatus, but we sure aren't! Join us this summer as we re-watch Season 1 of our least favorite show. In the Pilot, we're introduced to the characters (including Josie and the Cheetah Girls) and learn about Jason Blossom's suspicious disappearance as the investigation unfolds. How the times have changed... Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-06-011h 08Riverdon't#24 Recycling (Riverdale 4x19)It's the season finale! Didn't feel like it? We know.. This week, we review Riverdale Season 4 Episode 19, "Chapter Seventy Six: Killing Mr. Honey." The gang gets banned from prom and decide to play a prank on Mr. Honey (did the parallel story structure trip you up too?). A few story lines were dropped without resolution (e.g. Barchie, Hiram's murder, tickling!), and we make season 5 predictions! Thank you all for sticking with us throughout this mess of a season. We're excited to announce we'll be rewatching Season 1 starting JUNE 1st, tell your friends! Don't forget...
2020-05-181h 05Riverdon't#23 Kevin is Lactose Intolerant (Riverdale 4x18)This week, we discuss what is apparently the penultimate episode of this season of Riverdale. Season 4 episode 18 "Chapter Seventy-Five: Lynchian" brings us more tickling than anyone ever expected or wanted, Barchie history, brotherly bonding over creepy video tapes, and generally weird energy. Want to know which Julia you're most like? Check out this Buzzfeed quiz: https://www.buzzfeed.com/torch1456/which-host-of-riverdont-matches-your-riverdale-pr-2gdlceonwj. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-05-041h 15Riverdon't#22 Archie's Unplugged Guitar (Riverdale 4x17)After a brief and unplanned hiatus (sorry everyone!) we are back with a new complaining session. Riverdale season 4 episode 17, "Chapter Seventy-Four: Wicked Little Town," bestows upon us its yearly musical episode and, unsurprisingly, we had a lot to say about it. We cringe, we fail to understand why Barchie is making a comeback, and, perhaps most importantly, we debut a spinoff of #FPOutfitWatch. Want to know which Julia you're most like? Check out this Buzzfeed quiz: https://www.buzzfeed.com/torch1456/which-host-of-riverdont-matches-your-riverdale-pr-2gdlceonwj. Let us know who you get on Twitter @riverdontpod! Or send an email to riverdont@gmail...
2020-04-281h 08Riverdon't#21 Riverdale Mad LibsSpecial podcast this week! While we wait for the next episode of Riverdale, we speculate how the town of Riverdale would cope with the corona pandemic/quarantine, and then play a fun game of mad libs! With a few nouns, some adjectives, and a dash of verbs, we co-write Riverdale's next episode (better than any of the writers anyway) and the plot twists are HUGE. Find our mad lib template on our Twitter @riverdontpod and share your results with us! And email your thoughts (and/or mad lib) to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-04-0733 minRiverdon't#20 FP: Tokyo Drift (Riverdale 4x16)This podcast gets a little weird. We discuss Riverdale Season 4 Episode 16 "Chapter Seventy-Three: The Locked Room" and some Riverdale news. The whole mystery is unraveled, we create the spinoff of a lifetime, and Archie fights the coronavirus? In all seriousness, wash your hands, practice social distancing, and stay safe everyone.Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-03-1649 minRiverdon't#19 Pop(s?) Disappoints Us (Riverdale 4x15)Special episode this week: Not only are we recording this week's recap in person, but we also have some live reactions to share with you! In Riverdale Season 4 Episode 15, "Chapter Seventy-Two: To Die For," the Fab Three get arrested, Donna slaps Brett, Barchie shippers rejoice, and Jughead's fate is revealed. #FPOutfitWatch #JusticeForJonathanFollow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-03-0951 minRiverdon't#18 Jughead's YouTube Channel (Riverdale 4x14)Riverdale's back, and we actually thought this episode was kinda entertaining? Is this the right podcast? Anyway, we talk about Riverdale Season 4 Episode 14, "Chapter Seventy-One: How to Get Away with Murder." Charles helps Betty (his sister) figure out if she murdered her boyfriend (his brother), Archie gets called another great nickname, and Veronica calls her boyfriend to a meeting. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-03-0356 minRiverdon't#17 Congrats, Marisol and Skeet!!We discuss some very exciting breaking news about Marisol Nichols (Hermione Lodge) and Skeet Ulrich (FP Jones). We extend our sincerest congratulations to the two and can only cross our fingers for the remainder of the cast. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-02-2429 minRiverdon't#16 Bread (Riverdale 4x13)This week, we discuss Riverdale Season 4 Episode 13, "Chapter Seventy: The Ides of March." Did you hate this episode or only mildly dislike it? Turns out Archie and Veronica really are still dating, Jughead leaves Stonewall (and maybe dies, idk), Hermosa is back, and it's somehow March in Riverdale. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-02-1857 minRiverdon't#15 Scooby Doo vs Riverdale (Riverdale 4x12)Don't worry, the tickling storyline is still going strong in Season 4 Episode 12 of Riverdale, "Chapter Sixty-Nine: Men of Honor". This episode begs many questions: is Brett the house video-taper? Is there anyone Archie won't fight? And, most importantly, what really is the difference between the Scooby Doo gang and the Riverdale bunch? Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-02-1053 minRiverdon't#14 Thanks Chuck, love you! (Riverdale 4x11)This week, we discuss Riverdale Season 4 Episode 11, "Chapter Sixty Eight: Quiz Show", an episode that featured rum raids, quiz shows, the brown hood, and... tickling? Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-02-0357 minRiverdon't# 13 Jughead's Inconsiderate Typewriter (Riverdale 4x10)The epic highs and lows of high school football are back (pls no) in Riverdale Season 4 Episode 10, "Chapter Sixty-Seven: Varsity Blues". Veronica makes rum, Betty investigates a lead, Jughead is heading to New Haven, and Riverdale High gets their own Sue Sylvester! Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-01-271h 05Riverdon't#12: The Music of RiverdaleIn this episode, we have a hearty discussion about Riverdale's most necessary feature: the musical numbers. We talk about the most memorable and confusing songs, including the iconic Mad World performance that will never stop haunting us. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-01-2142 minRiverdon't#11: Riverdale Quote or Trump Tweet?Happy 2020! We are back and ready to party in this week's podcast. We briefly discuss Riverdale news before playing a game that answers the age-old question: is this a quote from Riverdale or a tweet from Donald Trump? Play along with us and let us know how you did on Twitter @riverdontpod! Or send an email to riverdont@gmail.com!
2020-01-0840 minRiverdon't#10: Patents & Morons (Riverdale 4x09)It's the mid-season finale! Didn't feel like it? We know..This week, we review Riverdale Season 4 Episode 9, "Chapter Sixty Six: Tangerine" chock-full with hypnosis, forest grandpas, teen aggression, and- please not another musical number (what did Elton do to deserve this?). Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2019-12-1653 minRiverdon't#9: Jughead Does Coke (Riverdale 4x08)Another episode, another hate-fest. This week, we review Riverdale Season 4 Episode 8, "Chapter Sixty-Five: In Treatment." The foursome finally go to therapy, college admissions are upon them, and Archie is NOT a moron!! Somehow this episode had a baseless plot, yet at the same time, numerous plot inconsistencies--that's Riverdale! Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2019-12-0956 minRiverdon't#8: Serpents are #Cancelled (Riverdale 4x07)Happy Thanksgiving! In this episode, we discuss Riverdale Season 4 Episode 7, "Chapter Sixty-Four: The Ice Storm." We talk about Jughead's bed, make cinematic parallels to other iconic TV shows, and question where half of the characters are. Thank you all for listening! Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2019-11-261h 02Riverdon't#7: Our Fire Story (Riverdale 4x06)This week, we discuss Riverdale Season 4 Episode 6, "Chapter Sixty-Three: Hereditary." So much happened in this episode. We talk about Charles and Chic, we ponder the idea of free pizza and arcade games, and we express our concerns for Cheryl's candles through a personal story about a candle that started a fire. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2019-11-181h 02Riverdon't#6: 42 Minutes of Sirens (Riverdale 4x05)In this week's episode, we get science-y and discuss Riverdale Season 4 Episode 5, "Chapter Sixty-Two: Witness for the Prosecution." We talk about why the fearsome foursome never attends high school and share the truth about the serial killer gene. We also talk about FP's glasses, of course. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2019-11-111h 14Riverdon't#5: Nana Rose's Eyepatch (Riverdale 4x04)Halloween is here in Riverdale and the scariest part is the fact that we're still giving this TV show our attention. In this episode, we discuss Riverdale Season 4 Episode 4, "Chapter Sixty-One: Halloween," and it's a spooky one. We talk about Gargoyle Boy, starting fires, and fighting crime. Speaking of crime, why is FP the only police officer in Riverdale when there's so much crime? This show makes no sense. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2019-11-041h 06Riverdon't#4: ROCKET MAN (Riverdale 4x03)New week, new Riverdale episode to hate on. In this episode, we discuss Riverdale Season 4 Episode 3, "Chapter Sixty: Dog Day Afternoon." A lot of stuff happens, but most importantly, we talk about Edgar Evernever's DIY rocket. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2019-10-2958 minRiverdon't#3: CGI Beehive (Riverdale 4x02)We have a lot to say about Riverdale Season 4 Episode 2, "Chapter Fifty-Nine: Fast Times at Riverdale High." Why does Riverdale High School have so many conflicting logos? Why does this show cover social issues so poorly? Why do they insist on inserting musical numbers into every episode? Does this season even have a plot? We're so tired. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod! And email your thoughts to riverdont@gmail.com!
2019-10-2150 min
Riverdon't#2: Cilantro Pancakes (Riverdale 4x01)In what will likely be our most respectful episode of Riverdon't, we discuss Riverdale's season 4 premiere, "Chapter Fifty-Eight: In Memoriam" and all of the touching moments of the tribute to Luke Perry. In addition, we talk about season 3's wrap up, what we think the future holds for some characters, and, most importantly, what herbaceous green is on Jughead's pancakes? Buzzfeed quiz: https://www.buzzfeed.com/kalisa/this-yes-or-no-quiz-will-reveal-which-riverdale-38opm Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod!
2019-10-1453 min
Riverdon't#1: Introduction and Riverdale Season 4 PredictionsWelcome to Riverdon't, the podcast where two girls with the same name discuss Riverdale. In this week's episode, we do a brief series recap, talk about our (least) favorite moments, and make some predictions about what we expect to happen in the next season. Follow us on Twitter @riverdontpod!
2019-10-041h 02
Play/TestChangelog: Quinn WilsonGuest: Quinn Wilson
Arms of the TideRiverdo's and Riverdon'ts
Discussion
Crunch in games is good, actually, and can promote longevity. Also: Design games with intent!
Changelog
Removed Convictions, replaced with Weights.
Fumbles are now generated on results of 1 on Difficulty Dice and Boons are generated on results of 8 on Difficulty Dice.
Failures may now be spent for more interesting effects.
Added Complication Dice (d8s that can be added to checks at a later time or spent to activate NPC boons or PC...
2019-04-1100 minRiverdo's and Riverdon'tsSeason 2: Episode 17: There are a Bunch of Nuns Coming, we Have to go!Holy shit, even though this episode might be a bit weaker than those that bookend it, it makes for an action-packed episode of RDARD.
This is because there are TRULY HEINOUS Riverdon'ts, fist-pumping Riverdo's, and both the most Rob-Destroying Weekly Weird yet... and probably the funniest fucking thing that we've ever seen on Riverdale.
Buckle up.
Please bother us at #RDARD on the tweeter.
Rob (@LordOfTheStith)
Quinn (@MonkipiQuinn)
Kat: (@kat_kuhl_)
Music: "Faded War Instrumental Version" by Josh Woodward
2019-02-2155 minRiverdo's and Riverdon'tsSeason 2: Episode 6: If Wishes Were HearsesWe here at Riverdo's and Riverdon'ts really haven't yet gotten over the fact that there's a gang called the goddamn Ghoulies. And let me tell you, this episode doesn't help us with our problem.
The closest thing to relief we get is another absurd thing to fixate on, and that, my dear friends, is the SUGAR MAN. That's the intimidating name of a spooky drug dealer. And it's clear someone in the writer's room was 100% convinced they'd knocked it out of the park. And the cast have to talk about him without peeing their pants. And they...
2018-10-251h 17Riverdo's and Riverdon'tsSeason 2: Episode 1: This Hiram FUCKSAfter a shamefully long delay, the second season of Riverdo's and Riverdon'ts is underway!
Quinn and I are joined by illustrious podcaster and Archie-Goddamn-EXPERT Kat Kuhl (@kat_kuhl_). And you guys, this isn't a one-off guest spot. She's the legit third host from here on; hype cannons to full power, if you please.
We go on many, many tangents in our discussion of Chapter 14: A Kiss Before Dying, little knowing that no matter how digressive our nonsense got, we'd never be able to hold a candle to the fluff-stuffed nonsense of Riverdale season 2 itself.
2018-09-191h 07
RuPaul: What's the Tee?Episode 167: Riverdon'tIn this episode Ru and Michelle discuss losing friends on the journey, riding the train, lessons from motown stars, the pressures facing children of famous folk, Whitney Houston, and Walton Goggins.
This episode is sponsored by Squarespace, Greats, and Warby Parker.
2018-08-291h 10