Shows
Hashtag SingleEP 83: GAMBLER'S MENTALITY | Dr. Kathrine BejanyanGot the February blahs? This time of year you may feel yourself especially triggered by the abundance of roses at Whole Foods around February 14th or simply depleted by the lack of sunshine and daylight hours. Whereever you're coming from, dating can be a downright slog in February, and if you're experiences negative feelings around your sense of self, resentment, or loss of hope, it may be signs that it's time to take a break.
But, can we take a break?? We've been exploring this topic in the last few episodes of #single. If you've been dating a...2024-02-2441 minHashtag SingleEP 82: DATING F*CKS WITH YOUR MENTAL ECOSYSTEM | Dr. Rick HansonHave you ever considered neuroplasticity when it comes to dating? No?!? Okay, me neither.
Why is it that we rarely consider and barely talk about how happiness, overall well being, and dating are interrelated?
What if I told you there was not just a science to our well being, but a scientific way to rewire the neuropathways in our brains towards happiness so that we can not only become better daters but actually enjoy the process??
Sounds to good to be true, right?
Dr. Rick Hanson, psychologist and New York Times Best...2024-01-241h 07Hashtag SingleEP 81: YOU ARE IN A MOMENT OF MAJOR TRANSITION | Liz KimballIt's December. Holiday breaks and family time approach. We look back and think about the year and all it brought us. Check in with yourself: how are you feeling about this year?
As you may know, 2023 was a difficult year for me all-around. I faced my father's death, getting dumped by a person who disrespected and possibly/ probably lied to me, and creativity blocks around my passion projects. Disconnect, lonelieness, and lack of purpose hounded me. With the death of my dad, I questioned the meaning of absolutely everything. Whether you too experienced these things or not, m...2023-12-1546 minHashtag SingleEP 80: DATING IN THE WAKE OF LOSSWE'RE BACK!! Well... kinda. You might have noticed (or you might have not, depending on the kind of year you have been having) that we've been absent for quite a while. Episode 79 was published in October 2022 - over a year ago. What's happened?
Quite alot, as it were. I got busy with work. I started dating someone. And then my dad got sick.
My dad died in May of this year.
Nothing seemed to matter anymore. It's still hard to feel like it does.
It took me a long time to de...2023-11-2153 minHashtag SingleEP 79: THE 35-YEAR-YOUNG VIRGINSonali is a radiant single woman who, at the blushing age of 35, is proudly still a virgin. Raised in a conservative Indian household, her family restricted her interactions socially, not just with boys her own age but girls as well, which meant she had limited social development until she went to college. Once there however, she wasn't allowed to stay on campus and commuted back-and-forth the entire time. This upbringing, in addition to her own strong beliefs about sex and one-night stands, has led her to become the 35-year-old virgin she is today.
There are a lot of...2022-10-1247 minHashtag SingleEP 78: SOCIETAL CHICKENIt all started with a story of getting picked up while walking down the street, leading to the innocuous question by Josh (our VOP): "How do I approach a woman in public without scaring her or offending her?"
If you listened to our last episode, you'll learn that I went on a solo group trip with Flash Pack to Peru in July, and there I met singles Elizabeth and Josh, who I got to have a lively conversation with over dinner one night in Urubamba. It's totally scary to approach a stranger in public and ask them o...2022-09-2855 minHashtag SingleEP 77: TRAVELING WITHOUT YOUR MATE(S) | Lee ThompsonThis summer we've featured some ways to get off the awful dating apps and meet people back in the real world, aka IRL dating. While City Swoon and We Met IRL are fantastic speed dating companies you should definitely be checking out (see Episodes 74 & 75), this episode is still in keeping with IRL dating experiences, but it's also a bit more.
In July I traveled to Peru with a company called Flack Pack, a boutique adventure travel company offering excursions for solo group travel for people in the 30's and 40's. Co-founder Lee Thompson found that in his 30's...2022-09-0746 minHashtag SingleEP 76: SO WHY ARE YOU SINGLE?Have you ever asked other single women just how many times they've been asked that dreaded question "Why are you single?" It's pervasive in our culture. But what happens when your date says it to you?? Or what if - as in the case of our guest Tara - your date actually has the balls to ask WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.
Honestly... what is wrong with PEOPLE.
For some reason it's unsettling to meet a woman in her 40's with no kids and who's single. Why? Because if you don't fit in a box, pe...2022-08-2351 minHashtag SingleEP 75: MEETING IRL, INTENTIONALLYIf you're still feeling like you need to shake things up a bit with your IRL dating game, enter Maxine Waters, an incredible entrepreneur and visionary whose BRAND NEW - as in, they literally hosted their very first event six months ago - speed dating company We Met IRL is completely changing the game.
Frustrated after attending a speed dating event that she felt wasn't very diverse, Maxine decided to do the thing that many of us talk about and never execute: if she couldn't find speed dating events that were specifically for women of color, she...2022-08-1059 minHashtag SingleEP 74: GET BACK TO IRL DATING | Benjamin GoodmanIf you like ahem, all of us, are tired of the dusty dating apps that lead to nowhere and are chomping at the bit for a Hot Girl Summer 2022, we got you! We're about to introduce you to companies that are shaking things up on the dating scene IRL - that's right, in real life. Just like 2005 all over again.
Benjamin Goodman is the Marketing and Events Consultant of international speed dating company City Swoon. City Swoon is different than your average speed dating service because it pairs the original structure of speed dating with an app-like alg...2022-07-0536 minHashtag SingleEP 73: LOOKING FOR LOVE... BLINDLY | Amber LeeAre you stumbling around in the dark blindly, looking for love or a relationship? Certainly sometimes online dating can feel that way, especially in NYC. Enter Amber Lee, CEO, Founder, and matchmaker at Select Date Society, a luxury matchmaking service working with high income earners and high caliber singles, that she started in the pandemic after a life-threatening and unexpected cardiac arrest while driving made her realize how life is short and there's no time like the present to go after one's dreams.
Now if you're like me you're thinking: I may be high caliber, but I'm not...2022-06-091h 00Hashtag SingleEP 72: AGED LIKE A FINE WINE: COMPLEX & A BIT NUTTYMy single guest this month is Annie, a wine enthusiast and educator, and we agree on two things: first, dating apps suck, and second, the 1984 classic adventure-comedy film "Romancing the Stone" is one of the best rom-coms of all time.
The problem of course is the set up: like a lot of unwitting screen heroines of her time, Kathleen Turner plays a woman who was guaranteed a drab existence until her life is suddenly transformed by the entrance of a stubborn and lonely man who also happens to be handsome and adventurous. They hate each other and they endure each othe...2022-05-1156 minHashtag SingleEP 71: REDEFINING PARTNERSHIP w Gender FluidsSo what exactly has changed in society around gender and sexuality in the last four years? Maybe it feels like we've made progress by gaining certain freedoms while at the same time things have also become way more complicated? If that resonates with you, you're in good company.
Fortunately for all of us I have THE most incredibly savvy, smart, sharp-witted human, Arielle Isaac Norman, a self-proclaimed "gender-flexing, five-star lesbian" who is creator and co-host of Gender Fluids podcast joining me to excavate and examine the culture of questioning and what it means to redefine partnership in a post- gender norm...2022-04-1957 minHashtag SingleEP 70: I’M FINE | Cassandra LeClairHey. How are u
?
Yup, we're tired of it too. If you're starting to feel as if the world no longer knows how to hold an actual conversation, you'll enjoy this talk I have with gender and communications professor Dr. Cassandra LeClair about accountability on dating apps, post-pandemic overwhelm, and the overall breakdown of boundaries in our dating experience and expectations.
Cassandra's journey to pursuing an understanding in communicating interpersonal needs and boundaries has always been clear, even if understanding why she felt the need to address unspoken fears, guilt, and shame was hidden beneath years of her own trauma. It t...2022-04-0653 minHashtag SingleEP 69: YOUR CREATIVE LIFE VS. LOVE LIFEThere's a superstition amongst creative people - especially amongst stand-up comedians - that if you're happy and in a successful, fulfilled relationship, that you'll lose your hunger for the art, or worse, the edge to your comedy. It comes out of the ancient idea that in order to be an artists, one needs to suffer for their art. So I sat down with two single comedians to find out if there's any truth to that old belief. Can comedians and creatives actually have successful traditional relationships, or do they just end up self-sabotaging because their passion always comes first?
Along the...2022-03-2353 minHashtag SingleEP 68: PRETTY B*TCHES | Lizzie SkurnickIf you're a badass feminist *obsessed* with Wordle (raises hand), let me introduce you to the goddess of words, Lizzie Skurnick, whose recent book "Pretty Bitches: On Being Called Crazy, Angry, Bossy, Frumpy, Feisty, and All the Other Words That Are Used to Undermine Women" is part memoir, part dramaturgical examination, and part exorcism of the words that have pained, broken, and oppressed women for decades of their lives.
If you've ever felt restricted by a word, shamed by a word, or called something you thought about for a week afterwards, you are not alone. It's time t...2022-03-091h 08Hashtag SingleEP 67: AGENCY IN YOUR ONE-NIGHT STAND with Good Girls Talk About SexI don't know if this makes us "good girls" or not but we looooove talking about sex on #single!
So this month I've invited transformational workshop leader, author, speaker, life coach and sex educator - and of course, podcast creator and host - Leah Carey to join me to talk about her life, journey and all the things that go into her podcast Good Girls Talk About Sex. We cover some spicy hot topics like sexual agency, informed consent, sexual coercion, and where sex actually fits into singlehood (and no, we're not just talking masturbation).
Join us on this juicy ride...2022-02-2454 minHashtag SingleEP 66: COMING SOON + THE BIG BOOK OF ORGASMS | Rachel Kramer BusselA lone girl sits on a busy New York City subway. She is huddled in a warm, burgendy down coat and pink hat, in sharp contrast to the fluorescent lights and cold metal that's around her. She is intently reading something on her phone and as she scrolls a flush comes to her cheeks and her eyes widen in interest. The small rosebud "O" of her mouth is hidden beneath her KN95 mask. A burly man in construction books sits down with a thud next to her, startling her focus. She can't help but notice his thick thighs tightly st...2022-02-0946 minHashtag SingleEP 65: REDEFINE YOUR ROI with Date Brazen the Podcast#Newyearnewidea We all could use a little change right now, and I thought it'd be fun to do something a little different. This year I'm kicking off a Podcast Exchange, where I interview the host of another podcast that's also talking about relationships and dating to see what their hot topics are, what inspires them, and whcih episodes really resonate with other single women in their audience.
This month I'm honored to have dating coach, speaker, former matchmaker and CEO of Date Brazen Lily Womble, whose podcast - aptly named Date Brazen the Podcast - addresses weekly hot topics that com...2022-01-2656 minHashtag SingleEP 64: BEING LOLITA | Alisson WoodWe begin 2022's new author series with Alisson Wood, whose first book "Being Lolita" is a memoir of the forbidden romance she had with her high school English teacher.
For the women who have been victims of a sexual predator, of sexual assault, of sexual trauma, especially as a teenager, Alisson wants you to know:
You are not alone.
You are seen.
You are validated.
You are understood.
And while this may initially seem like a bit of a left turn for #single, there are universal themes that emerge in Alisson's book that are not new territory for this podcast, inc...2022-01-121h 00Hashtag SingleEP 63: 2021 RECAPY'all! What a year it's been!! Most years when we hit December everyone says "wow this year flew by!" but dear god why did this one feel soooo loooong?
In lieu of a 1:1 episode for December, I decided to do something new. I created a little mashup of the choicest nuggets from all of this year's guest expert episodes. I had such incredible conversations with inspiring women on a range of topics, from female empowerment to financial behavior to dating with children to being child-free and beyond. If you didn't get the chance to listen to all twelve...2021-12-291h 04Hashtag SingleEP 62: GET DOWN WITH NLP | Lily Walford
Yeah you know me! Who's down with NLP? Every last homieeeee....
..... Sorry, couldn''t help myself. If you're not familiar with NLP, those letters stand for Neuro-Linguistic Programming, which comes down to how one communicates with the subconscious. We all know that our brain is receiving thousands of signals in every moment that we're not even consciously aware of; NLP practitioners believe there is a connection between neurological processes (neuro-), language (linguistic) and behavioral patterns learned through experience (programming), and that these can be changed to achieve specific goals in life. By knowing how to tap into this information, the goal is to f...2021-12-0858 minHashtag SingleEP 61: NOT MOMS | Katie Von Till and Julie WittnerFor my lady friends who do not have kids.... what does your friend group look like? Do you also have friends who are child-free? Or do you maybe have a lot of girlfriends you just plain haven't seen in a while, where your friendship has petered out a bit after they decided to have kids?
For a lot of single people who are of child-bearing age, especially women, the dropoff of your friend group can be particularly devastating. Comedians Julie Whittner and Katie Von Till are two such women who met in an acting class but inevitably bonded over not just...2021-11-1054 minHashtag SingleEP 60: THE DIVORCE PHOENIXRachel is a fabulous single woman with a fascinating story that starts with finding her husband at a Mormon college that has traditional gender roles, going to China as newlyweds, leaving him, returning to China, experimenting with dating both sexes there, and ultimately returning stateside to Colorado.
Now... you don't have to necessarily move across the world to another country post-divorce, but In the process of trying to bend over backwards to make her marriage work, she ultimately lost so much of her true self that she found being in a strange city helped her process her emotions and reconnect with...2021-10-2758 minHashtag SingleEP 59: UNCONVENTIONALLY INTIMATE | Alexandra LaplanteNext up in our creativity series is Alexandra Laplante, a queer writer/ performer who talks about her journey from monogamy to cheating to polyamory in a solo storytelling piece called "Unconventionally Intimate" which in pre-pandemic times was staged and performed in people's apartments around NYC!
Alex shares her incredible story with us of how she used writing and ultimately performing to help her become honest and open with her sexuality and her core truths, and ultimately find peace with how she wanted to live her life. She created this show because she believes there needs to be mo...2021-10-1348 minHashtag SingleEP 58: DOES EFFORT = SUCCESS?The online daters' dilemma: do I give this bad texter the benefit of the doubt and double down on my effort to coax them out of their shell? Or do I take their lack of communication as a clue that they're really not all that interested and move on?
Related: in this day and age, do women still expect to be pursued a bit harder (courted, if you will?).... or does the "me culture" of 2021 prevent all of us from pursuing more than we're being pursued?
Spoiler: we don't have answers in this episode. But She...2021-09-2843 minHashtag SingleEP 57: DATING: THE FILM AND SERIES | Eirinn Disbrow, Jonah Feingold, & Anna JallerEver catch yourself thinking: "My dating life is so epic, it would make a great movie or tv series!!" followed by "that's ridiculous, movies take thousands of dollars?!" or even "that's ridiculous! It's the pandemic, I can't even GO to the movies!!" ?
Well friends, I have not one but TWO incredible filmmaking teams that beat both odds and managed to create gorgeous, hilarious, heartwarming content, pandemic be damned, about modern dating.
Eirinn Disbrow (Director) and Anna Jaller (Producer, Actor) created Love in 2020, an all-too-familiar tale of managing dating while quarantined inside your home, that ultimately be...2021-09-1450 minHashtag SingleEP 56: YOU NEED AN AGE DETOXLet's acknowledge some assumptions about older age that have been programmed into us.
People of an older age naturally feel a need to settle down.
They get comfortable in their ways. They're afraid to take risks. They're happy the way things are. They're inflexible.
They don't take care of themselves and they "let themselves go", because they stop caring.
All older men want to date much younger women.
They give zero fucks.
Okay, the last one is 100% true. But the rest aren't always. Why do we have certain preconceptions of certain age groups? Who put them there? Why do we...2021-08-3147 minHashtag SingleEP 55: YOUR FINANCIAL INDEPENDENCE | Olivia SummerhillAugust is National Financial Awareness month (it's okay, we didn't know either), so in honor of always trying to become more aware and educated, this month's guest is the very badass Olivia Summerhill of Summerhill Wealth Management, an asset management firm that specifically works with high net worth women before, during, and after divorce.
If the words "wealth" and "high net worth" have you about to skip this episode, hear me out: this conversation is way more than talking about what house billionaires get to keep after they find their husband boinking the nanny. It's true in A...2021-08-1750 minHashtag SingleEP 54: LEARNING FROM OUR MOTHERSEveryone has a "my mom told me" story when it comes to sex and dating. Sometimes they're funny, oftentimes they're weird, and every once in a blue moon there's that best friend who brags about how she got the cool mom who gave her the deets like the older sister we all craved.
My guest Tati was homeschooled until college, which means she lacked the requisite sex ed we had to suffer in school and also missed out on all the secret information that was whispered in the girls locker room. Not to mention - her mother tol...2021-07-2853 minHashtag SingleEP 53: MORE BAE WITH FOURPLAY | Julie Griggs and Danielle DietzekIf you're ready for a different type of dating app experience, I can't wait to introduce you to the badass ladies behind new group dating app FourPlay. Julie Griggs and Danielle Dietzek were working full time as medical professionals when they decided to develop a dating app with a difference, one that took the pressure off the one-on-one connection and focused on getting single people connecting in the world in real life.
How's it work? Simple. You join with a pal, called a "teammate" and you make a team dating profile. Then both of you can swipe ind...2021-07-1353 minHashtag SingleEP 52: YOUR INTERNAL FAITHWhat are the three things you're not supposed to bring up in polite conversation? Sex, politics, religion? Right, well, we're breaking all the rules on this one - cause not only do we talk about all three, but we dive deep into how religion, specifically, hyper-conservative Christian religions, can influence our value systems and our approach to dating and love in general. What are the challenges of navigating being a single independent woman when you were raised to just be a wife and a mom?
My guest Stephanie comes from a fundamentalist Christian upbringing, which is particularly str...2021-06-2948 minHashtag SingleEP 51: DATING IN THE 90's | Sandra HattonYOU GO GIRLFRIEND!!! We're throwin' it back to the 90's in honor of my birthday this month and the 30th anniversary of It's Just Lunch, a multi-national matchmaking agency founded in 1991 by a busy, professional woman who wanted to make it easier for professionals to date.
So, what was working with a matchmaking agency even like in 1991 when the internet was a baby? I talk with VP of Sales Sandra Hatton to discuss the biggest thing that has shifted in our culture of dating in thirty years: verification. Dating has gone from someone you know (or who know...2021-06-0851 minHashtag SingleEP 50: JET SET DATINGYou know that cliche Hallmark fairy tale story where the big, successful city girl goes home to her parents house in small town America for a short time and she falls in love with the unexpectedly hot single guy that runs the bike or handyman shop and she has to decide between returning to her (lonely) big city life or return to her roots in this small suburban town? Know anyone that happened to in the pandemic?
Yeah, neither do we. Our guest Zofia (and many others) went home and simply took a break from dating altogether. Why bother dating when y...2021-05-2652 minHashtag SingleEP 49: FINDING FREEDOM IN (M)OTHERHOOD | Leisse WilcoxHow do you process being single? Do you feel frustrated, doubtful, even shamed? In this episode with transformational mindset and relational coach Leisse Wilcox, we take a deep dive into where that shame comes from, whether it's internal or external, and what you can "do" (and not do) about it.
And since we celebrate Mother's Day this month and Leisse is a mother of three herself who also happens to be single, we approach the topic of "otherhood".... what happens to us when we fill or don't fill society's expectations of us to be mothers?
Listen in to Leisse's gorgeous guida...2021-05-1151 minHashtag SingleEP 48: PRINCIPLES OF POLY DATINGHave you been wanting #single to chat with a pansexual polyamorous/ ethical non-monogamist sober stand-up comedian? Well, your prayers have been answered!!
Listen in as I chat with Lisa, a delightful gem of person, on all of the unique dynamics of polyamorous dating... on apps.... in a pandemic....including what exactly it takes to be in a healthy multiple partnership (spoiler: it's all about communication).
We also talk orgies and Lisa's genius new idea for a bi/ poly dating app... wait for it... it's called PANCE.. and we're here for it. :)2021-04-2847 minHashtag SingleEP 47: PLAYING WITHOUT A PARTNER | Dr. Megan StubbsThere's a lot of books for single people about dating. And a lot of sex books that are written for couples. Sooo..... why aren't there any sex books specifically written for single people?
Enter Dr. Megan Stubbs, aka the "single sexologist," whose soon-to-be released book, "Playing Without a Partner," was written just for us on the topics of confidence, contentedness, fulfillment, and yes, sex in singledom.
What's it really mean to be alone? How can this time be beneficial instead of detrimental? How can we live whole, full lives, experiencing all life has to offer as s...2021-04-1348 minHashtag SingleEP 46: THAT POWER DYNAMICYou've dated a douchebag. Right? We all have. There's no avoiding it. There seems to be a plethora of dbs out there in the single world, especially in this crazy time of Covid.
if y'all thought dating in New York is bad.... we clearly had no idea what we weren't missing until I started talking to Mona, a badass comedian living and dating in LA who has got dating stories that will blow your mind. It's one thing to try and date people in the entertainment industry who are just trying to use you to grow their following or ask you for a...2021-03-3051 minHashtag SingleEP 45: SINGLE IS THE NEW BLACK | Dr. Karin Anderson AbrellLet's talk about single shaming.
Chances are, you're been victim to it at least once in your life. You've been told, directly or indirectly, that since you're clearly so fabulous and still single, that you simply must be doing something wrong! You're too picky. Or you're too thin. Or too loud. Or too desperate. The list goes on and on.
And who are the people most likely to be using this disparaging language on us? Our friends. Our family. Even our own mothers.
To be fair, it's not really their fault. They have been indoctri...2021-03-1050 minHashtag SingleEP 44: DATING AMNESIAEver had that thing where you're chatting with someone on a dating app and it all starts to feel a little.... familiar?? I'll be the first to admit that I've started conversations with people I unmatched previously without fully realizing it at first, but unlike my guest Robin I'll eventually let the guy know what's up. Robin however, likes to see "how far she can take it" lol before a guy will figure it out and sometimes.... spoiler!... they never do!! This has led her to have some seriously weird dating situations.
Do men have dating match amnesia when it com...2021-02-241h 01Hashtag SingleEP 43: THE INTERSECTION OF FEMINISM + DATING | Teresa Thomas, M.S.Have you ever struggled with reconciling the equality you want in a relationship and the empowerment you have in your life with dating online?
.... Okay - that sentence might have just blown your mind a little bit. But in this episode I'm joined by life & relationship coach Teresa Thomas, M.S, who's here to tell us that the way we identify ourselves and the things we want don't have to be mutually exclusive. As a person who identifies as a Black feminist, she understands that society can often make you choose between your identities and your desires, but...2021-02-1051 minHashtag SingleEP 42: DATING HALF YOUR AGE PLUS SEVENBe honest: what's your age on your dating profile? Now, be even more honest: what's the age range you're looking for? Is it your own age, plus or minus five years, or are you consistently looking for people younger than you?
My 1:1 guest this month, Grace, has an amazing range she's open to - guys ten years younger AND guys ten years older... which means she can potentially match with guys in their late 20's or even in their 50's, and you'd be surprised how much the kinds of dates differ between the two.
If Grace's voice sounds familiar to you, it...2021-01-2755 minHashtag SingleBONUS EP: #single x GIRL AND THE GOVBONUS EPISODE!! With this month's inauguration and allllll the intense politics of this month and the past year (woof), we wanted to bring you a bonus mash-up episode with two very awesome ladies who host innovative political podcast Girl and The Gov, who just so happen to be single :). Sammy and Maddie created Girl and The Gov podcast to provide a platform for young women to engage with the evolving political sphere in an approachable, digestible, and accessible way. We're super on board with highlighting women in the political space and all for establishing a place to amplify female voices.
And...2021-01-1942 minHashtag SingleEP 41: SINGLE. THAT DOES NOT MEAN... | Acamea DeadwilerPrepare to be showered by the goddess wisdom of Acamea Deadwiler, accomplished writer and author of "Single. That: Dispelling the Top Ten Myths of the Single Woman" which we're officially claiming as the #single podcast manifesto!!
Ever been called lonely, desperate, sexually frustrated, bitter? Chances are you've been labelled or accused of at least one of these things one time or another - just because you're single. What's up with that? Why does our culture make such negative assumptions about us because we're not partnered up? Acamea and I get deep into our introspection and analysis of the things in our soci...2021-01-1350 minHashtag SingleEP 40: THE DATING APP TIME WARPIf you've ever felt frustrated or out-of-sync with the speed which your matches want to move, you're SO not alone. The timing of everything - from when to move off the app, when to trust someone with your phone number, when to meet up, and when you're ready to send sexy texts/ pics doesn't just vary from person to person, it seems like it varies greatly between men and women.
My guest Jessica and I discuss why is it that men seem to want to talk to you like you're their girlfriend when they haven't yet put in...2020-12-2249 minHashtag SingleEP 39: ISO: BUSINESS PARTNER FOR LOVE | April DavisWhen it comes to dating apps, are you winging it? Swiping right with abandon or whenever someone seems cute or sane enough to have a conversation with? That might be a good starting point but you may find that ultimately there's not enough to sustain you, and that's because you're not dating strategically.
April Davis is the founder/ president of Luma, a privately-owned matchmaking firm with 40 locations across the US. A certified life coach as well, she coaches her clients on the one thing she sees that's missing in today's dating culture: value and goal-based dating.
P...2020-12-0851 minHashtag SingleEP 38: POWER COUPLE DREAMSPicture this: it's a bright, warm, Hallmark-movie day... you're out running errands (with your mask on, natch), popping in to the post office and dashing off to Trader Joe's when you decide on a quick coffee stop... where you spot a cutie waiting for his oat milk latte. Your eyes meet across the room. He smiles (or at least... his eyes kinda crinkle above his mask)... you smile... and then... and then what?
Not exactly sure what comes next cause that just doesn't happen to you? We're in the same boat. How many times has anyone actually ever had a "meet-c...2020-11-2451 minHashtag SingleEP 37: PREPARE TO SHARE YOUR BAGGAGE | Three Day RuleWhat's your "baggage"? Divorced, STIs, single mom of three kids, intimacy issues? Our two experts - Michael Naisteter and Jaime Bernstein - are pro matchmakers from company Three Day Rule with backgrounds in sex positivity/ education and coaching the transition from co-parenting to single parenting. They share their wisdom & insight with us on how to hurdle the barrier of facing your scary perceived baggage with someone new by knowing your value and doing the prep work needed to have these kinds of conversations. As Jaime says,
"Part of being an adult and being able to grow and move...2020-11-1046 minHashtag SingleEP 36: HEALTHY, ADULT DATINGDid you ever get to that point in a relationship where your higher, smarter, grown self just sorta knew that you had to walk away cause it wasn't working out? Not because you didn't love the person, but because a part of you could see that they weren't willing to work on their shit (while you've been working on yours all this time) and you knew that without that link, the problem wouldn't fix itself.
It takes a GROWN-ASS WOMAN to truly know her whole self, and know her full value to walk away from what's not work...2020-10-2054 minHashtag SingleEP 35: INVEST YOURSELF FULLY | Tammi PickleExcited to bring you our third episode in our Meet a Matchmaker Series! Meet Tammi Pickle, VP and Partner of Elite Connections Matchmaking Agency which has been a female-founded, family-based (we're talking Tammi's mom!) company matchmaking singles since allllll the way back in 1994!!! That's right - from matching by snail mail into the digital age, Elite has now grown up to thirteen (!) offices nationwide and internationally. If that isn't a success story of female vision, leadership and badassery, I don't know what is.
Tammi shares with us her insider knowledge from working with and around her mom sinc...2020-10-0650 minHashtag SingleEP 34: WORLD TRAVELER OF MEN#single is going international y'all!! It's our very first episode featuring a single guest from another country and we're so excited to get down and dirty about dating in other cultures. Jeane, originally from Singapore, is a New Yorker celebrating her 10th anniversary here (woohoo!), and invited her friend Govin from Malaysia to join us virtually - and there is *such shade* thrown between a Singaporean and Malaysian it's a good thing everyone is sheltering in place in their homes!! haha
Jeane brings a unique perspective of dating, from her upbringing in Singapore to six years in Au...2020-09-2259 minHashtag SingleEP 33: GETTIN' NERDY WITH DATING DATA! | Erika EttinHave you ever thought about your app response rate? How about your message-to-conversion rate? Have you ever done a controlled experiment to see what exactly elicits a response? Nah, me either. But Erika Ettin, online dating coach and founder of coaching service A Little Nudge, has. In fact, with a masters degree and a background in finance, she loves to get downright nerdy with her dating data.
Dating is, after all, a great experiment, and Erika joins #single to share her tips, ideas, and suggestions to set you up for success, and how to handle dating in Covid...2020-09-0843 minHashtag SingleEP 32: DEMISEXUALITY DURING RECOVERY TIMETrying to date with health issues is hard enough. (When do I bring it up, before the date? After three dates? Should I put it in my profile??) But what about the period of time when your health has stabilized and you're just dipping your toe back into the field? Aside from the challenge of coming back to app dating after a hiatus, it brings up a lot of anxiety and emotion about how to address "what you've been up to" and the desire to be honest but not scare people away.
There have been so many single...2020-08-2551 minHashtag SingleEP 31: HEADHUNTER FOR LOVE | Ashley CampanaWelcome to a new series of episodes we're offering with different matchmakers & dating coaches!! If you're feeling super tired of using endless apps in quarantine, maybe you're starting to get curious about what it'd be like to work with a matchmaker and just have someone else take the reigns for a bit. Or maybe you just want some tips & tricks about how to manage virtual dating right now. Either way, we've got you covered, and we can't wait to bring you a bunch of awesome new guests on this topic.
For our first episode of this series, we...2020-08-1851 minHashtag SingleEP 30: DATING IN A DIVISIVE CLIMATEThere's a common belief that in certain circumstances - work, brunch with your grandparents, maybe the odd bachelorette party - it's considered impolite to broach certain topics. You can probably guess what the trifecta is: sex, religion, and - of course - politics. But as mainstream culture begins to call out biases, the way forward just can't be to hide in your corner and pretend you don't have any opinion about anything. How do we find a happy medium between the way we've been socialized as women to behave - mannered, respectful, not ruffling feathers - and asserting an opin...2020-07-1444 minHashtag SingleEP 29: SEX ED. . . BUT FUNNY | Raylene TaskoskiWhat if you had an unapologetic, informed, entrepreneurial, badass comedienne as your sex ed teacher? Maybe you woulda listened more in high school, right? And it mighta saved you a few years of awkward, uncomfortable, and plain old bad sex too.
Raylene Taskoski is the best friend, aunt, and sex ed teacher you always wished you'd had. She's a motivational speaker and stand-up comedian who has spoken to over 10,000 women about sex over the last decade through sex toy parties, her keynote talk "Let's Talk about Sex: the Importance of Open, Honest Discussions about Women's Sexual Health," and...2020-07-0149 minHashtag SingleEP 28: HOOK A GIRL UP!Select all that are true: Dating online is frustrating. Dating online is isolating. Dating online is boring. Swiping is tedious and does not lead to anything meaningful.(If you're like us: ALL OF THE ABOVE.)
Ever find yourself wondering if this is truly the only way to date? I mean, your friends and family must know at least one single person, right? Maybe two? And if so, why the hell can't they just hook a girl up already?!
My 1:1 guest this month, Renee-Michele, and I discuss why exactly setting up your friends has fallen by the ways...2020-06-1748 minHashtag SingleEP 27: WE'RE ALL DATING APP JUNKIESWell singles, we're heading into month THREE of quarantine and social isolation. How's everyone doing out there? Maybe jumping from app to app searching for a less shitty experience? I hear you. For this month's 1:1, I chat with my good friend Chris who like me is a dating app junkie. We go head to head talking about the ones we've tried and then deleted and then downloaded again six months later.
If you thought *I* had some crap dating stories, Chris has got some doozies that will be sure to make your mouth drop. It's amazing...2020-05-2640 minHashtag SingleEP 26: EVERYONE WANTS TO PLAY TINDER | Emily J. SmithSo here we are, two months into quarantine. Chances are, you're sick of swiping right, getting ghosted, sifting through profiles, and unmatching (or getting unmatched yourself), and there's been a moment or two where you've thought: there's gotta be a better app.
Enter Chorus, a female-led matchmaking app where friends swipe for friends. It's a way for people in relationships to participate in online dating and support their friends in this culture that is now, as founder Emily Smith puts it, "notoriously kind of terrible." Remember when you used to go to parties and you'd say to...2020-05-0747 minHashtag SingleEP 25: YOUR SEXUAL QUARAN-TEAM | Dr. Jess O'Reilly and Marla Renee StewartYou're checking in with family. You're exercising at home. You're meditating and taking sanity walks and me time. But... where's your sexuality in this quarantine?
If you're single and in isolation (like me) I'm gonna guess it's preeeeetty dormant. But this is a time of high stress, and whether or not you realize it, sex and stress are, er, bedmates. On this episode I'm blessed to have two very badass women from the world of sex positivity, Dr. Jess O'Reilly and Marla Renee Stewart, who have recently teamed up to write a very cool new book called "The Ul...2020-04-2148 minHashtag SingleEP 24: THE MALE-FEMALE COMPETITION FALLACYReal question: If we're all looking for a partner to grow with, what if you're a woman who's already arrived?
For centuries women have been the family financial planner, strategist, and saver - and rightly so, because science has shown us that women are more likely than men to think long-term. Meet Emilie Jerard, the most badass financial strategist out there, a self-taught bitcoin and cryptocurrency expert and advocate for individuals (especially women) to take control of their financial wellness with long-term strategy. And this isn't even her job you guys, it's just her hobby. Emili...2020-04-091h 01Hashtag SingleEP 23: LOVE IN THE TIME OF CORONA | Clarissa SilvaHappy quarantine everyone! The last week has been a doozy for all of us as we find our lives suddenly interrupted and altered, our schedules disrupted, our norms dismantled, and our social lives distanced. After thinking it through, I decided I wanted to keep the podcast going as best I could. So with the help of Gotham Podcast Studio, we recorded this episode virtually, with all three of us - me, my guest, and our tech - in our respective homes. Technology is awesome :)! Please forgive any difference in sound quality you might hear.
A lot of...2020-03-2444 minHashtag SingleEP 22: DON‘T APOLOGIZE FOR YOUR [ ]Ever been told you're intimidating? Ever been told you're too much? Ever been told you're overwhelming, too educated, a know-it-all, too successful, aggressive or assertive?
What about objectified? For being a certain size, a certain shape, a certain weight, a certain race? How about just for being a f***king woman!???
This month we're joined by Leah V., a writer, model, body-positive activist and self-proclaimed "unashamed fat, black, Muslim" who is the absolute epitome of living a queenly badass existence. Leah V. spills the deets on her love life and ten year marriage to a Muslim...2020-03-1146 minHashtag SingleEP 21: TAKING SEXY BACK | Dr. Alexandra SolomonHappy Tuesday, singles! We have an incredible guest expert episode for your February blahs. Whether Valentine's Day has found you getting your groove on or Netflix-and-chillin' solo, renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Alexandra Solomon is here to share her uplifting and profound wisdom on reclaiming your sexuality as a thing of value and cultivating it in a way that feels authentic and aligned to you.
We are honored to have Dr. Solomon join us to talk about her new book Taking Sexy Back (a companion book to her acclaimed Loving Bravely: Twenty Lessons of Self-Discovery to Help...2020-02-2543 minHashtag SingleEP 20: THAT NAGGING VOICE"OMG it's Valentine's Day, I should have a partner I can go out with."
"OMG I'm nearly 30, I should be getting married by now, what's wrong with me?"
"OMG I'm turning 40, I should have a baby soon or I'll be out of time."
Sound familiar? Probably we all have some version of that nagging voice in our heads that tells us we should be settling down, or should be following a "traditional" path, or should be elsewhere in our lives romantically than we are right now. It's hard...2020-02-1245 minHashtag SingleEP 19: DISRUPTING THE PATTERN | Grace LeeHAPPY NEW DECADE, singles!! We too are excited to shake things up a bit!! You may have noticed that last month we introduced a new kind of episode with an interview with Laura about her book. This year we're excited to bring you more one-on-one interviews with singles, in addition to providing really cool content with an expert on any topic surrounding or involving single people. Yay! We're calling these - wait for it - our Guest Expert episodes, and we're hoping to have one per month going forward. (Side note: if you have anyone you know should be on our...2020-01-2842 minHashtag SingleEP 18: THE SOCIAL CONTRACT OF DATINGHey ladies: Ever stay on a date an hour longer than you wanted to because you "felt bad" leaving early? Ever go on a date you didn't really want to go on because you couldn't figure out how to get out of it? Ever talk to a persistent pursuer on the subway or in a cab in a way that you thought was a polite turn down but he just didn't pick up on?
As women, a lot of us have been there. Is it because at some point along the way we must have been...2020-01-1447 minHashtag SingleEP 17: FOR SINGLES WITH $INGLES | Laura M. OliverEver look through the Self Help or Advice section of Barnes & Noble --- err, actually Amazon Books -- well actually actually amazon.com, let's be real here -- and think, "Man! None of these books apply to me!!" Well you're finally in luck, because one badass feminist writer wrote a book JUST FOR US! "Singles: Take Control of Your Own Financial Journey" author Laura M. Oliver joins #single to share her views on the pros and cons of being single financially, what you can do to get your own self economically sound regardless of your past, and answers for us...2019-12-2341 minHashtag SingleEP 16: YOUR LOVE GURUGuru (Sanskrit: "venerable") in Hinduism, a personal spiritual teacher or guide.
Our guest this month is Priyanka, who may not know this but is officially becoming the love guru of #single. Full of wisdom, confidence, conviction, and inner strength, this powerhouse Indian feminist knows what she wants in life and in a partner (whether they be alive or dead). Through an incredibly rich international upbringing she has navigated all the highs and lows of dating, from Indian aunties setting her up, to long-term teenage commitment, landing now in the complex New York world of online dat...2019-12-1135 minHashtag SingleEP 15: DATING IS A COMEDY SHOW | Robyn Lynne NorrisDating's only tolerable if we can laugh about it, right? (I mean. . . you are listening to this podcast, after all) So for the second October episode of #single (recorded October 31st, because being single is the spooooookiest costume of all) I decided to bring in two professional comedians who have made us laugh based on their own horrific experiences of dating online to talk about what it is about live performance that makes this content so relatable, as well the process of taking something potentially negative and using it as a creative mechanism to connect with others in a s...2019-11-0642 minHashtag SingleEP 14: PUT YOUR OWN OXYGEN MASK ON FIRSTReal talk: we're all unfinished human beings. We're all working on bettering ourselves, going to yoga, meditating, medicating, and practicing self care, aren't we?
WAIT, AREN'T WE?? I don't know if you know this, but dating online is a minefield of red flags and you best be your best self before you even think about taking it on. It can be emotionally traumatizing and also, not for nothing, but if you're not working on yourself, how can you really - REALLY - be ready for the challenges of partnering up with another human being?
2019-10-2947 min
Hashtag SingleEP 13: HOME IMPROVEMENT WHILE SINGLEOKAY ladies, hands up - who owns a drill? You better all have your hands up because home improvement while single is NO JOKE. And as my guest Emily and I exchange some rather entertaining anecdotes of attempting to do a two-person job just on your lonesome, we realized one very important thing: that when you're a woman, accomplishment of any particular challenging physical job becomes in a way a sort of challenge. As in, "Oh I'm supposed to have someone in my life do this for me?! Watch this, Society!! F U Patriarchy!!" {{enter obscene finger/ arm gestures, if nee...2019-09-1049 min
Hashtag SingleEP 12: YOU CAN'T CONTROL THE OUTCOME | Rachel MossHello Single World! Thing have been a-changin' here at #single. The first thing you'll notice is that we've gone from two hosts down to one. What can we say? Even podcast hosts don't stay together forever. Womp-womp. We'll miss you Traci!!
So to excuse our being MIA in your lives all summer, we've got a special treat: This episode features dating coach Rachel Moss of online dating coaching site A Good First Date to give all our listeners her tips and tricks on what makes a successful dating profile and how to approach dating so it's most effecti...2019-08-2046 min
Hashtag SingleEP 11: DATING SUCKS IN EVERY LANGUAGEThis month we are celebrating Asian Pacific Heritage Month with an incredibly deep conversation with two Asian-American New Yorkers, Cindy and David, about the influence one's cultural heritage has on their attraction to people of certain ethnicities.
Ever contemplate the mechanics of desire? Why it is that you're attracted to people of one race or another? Following up on two other podcasts that explore this topic, Escape from Plan A (Ep. 75: Analyzing NPR Invisibilia's Podcast On Racial Attraction) and NPR's Invisibilia (A Very Offensive Rom-Com), we dive into unearthing why it's important to find a part...2019-05-0738 minHashtag SingleEP 10: THE TALKAre you ready to have the talk with someone you are dating? Do you miss meeting people in real life or are you more comfortable chatting online until you eventually meet in a bar?
On today’s episode, Traci talks to Jessica about how to bring up the topic of moving from casually dating to being in a relationship, how approaching people IRL is nerve wracking for both people (but oh how we miss it!), and how people rarely allow themselves vulnerable. Traci learns what a Claddagh ring is and how to properly wear it- don’t get...2019-04-1639 minHashtag SingleEP 9: YOUR DATE-O-METER IS BROKENEver feel like your Date-o-Meter is broken? We do. All. The. Time.
Join Jeanette and guest Taylor as we analyze and dismantle the conundrum of the "Ejection Disclaimer" - an easy-out excuse that gets used when people kiiiinda still wanna hang, but also don't want to commit fully. Wait, commitment? Does anyone even want that anymore!? How is it that our grandparents could meet in their hometown dance and stay married for 60 years, yet we have the entire catalogue of NYC singles in our literal pockets and no one can seem to be able to find the right...2019-04-0234 minHashtag SingleEP 8: MAKE THE APPS YOUR BITCHEver get to the place where you have zero f*cks left? Imagine arriving at the place where you are actually in charge of the mind-fuckery that is online dating. (A girl can dream!) Guests Misha and James both have their heads supremely squared on their shoulders and have spent some time figuring out how this dating game can be conquered, if only with just a little bit of mind mastery.
Join us on this exceptionally enlightening episode of #single that has us talking about why dating apps are flawed (and why you're doing them wro...2019-03-0540 minHashtag SingleEP 7: THE "MASC" OF MASCULINITYToxic Masculinity. That's a phrase that's been almost everywhere recently, dontcha think? The airing of the controversial Gillette commercial last month challenged men's and boys' behavior in our society by asking viewers to think a bit harder about the tagline "the best a man can get."
But what the hell IS "masculinity" actually, especially as it relates to dating? What is it that attracts (or repels) women (and men) to men? On today's queer episode Jeanette interviews Shoshanna, who is attracted to both men and women, about what she looks for in both genders. If you're...2019-02-1938 minHashtag SingleEP 6: NO ONE TELLS YOU THISHappy Tuesday, singles! This new episode is a bit of a break from our other episodes in that we talk mostly about a book -- hold on, hear us out. Jeanette talks to Jackie, a single New York woman on the brink of turning 40 and confronted with all the issues of what that exactly means if she is not married, in a relationship, and does not have children.... and doesn't exactly plan on having those things any time soon. Jackie found her experience reflected in memoir "No One Tells You This" by Glynnis MacNicol, and what follows is two awe...2019-01-0833 minHashtag SingleEP 5: PANSEXUALITY ISN'T LOVING PANS, PEOPLEIn episode 5 of #single, we speak with Diane, an aspiring theater director who is navigating millennial dating on the cusp of turning 30 and has just come out to her parents..... as pansexual.
Just what is pansexuality? It's okay if (like us) you're a little vague on what this label exactly means. Then again, why do we have to define ourselves anyway? Can't we just love who we love and you can shut up about it?? Okay, sorry, we just got a little carried away there.
Join us as we chat with Diane...2018-12-1829 minHashtag SingleEP 4: FIRST DATE EXPECTATIONSWhat exactly is it that men and women are expecting on a first date? (it's not naked time) (don't pretend your mind didn't go there)
This month #single was invited to the bonnie mountains of Vermont as part of its inaugural Podcast Competition of Independent TV Festival (ITVFest). Part of that honor meant recording an episode of our show while at the festival in the ITVFest podcast booth. So Jeanette invited two sexy and single filmmakers/ content creators, Caris and Jonathan, to join her in talking about what's really got their goat about trying to find a s...2018-12-0426 minHashtag SingleEP 3: DATING OVER 40In episode 3 of #single, we speak with Tonya, a highly successful advertising executive in New York City.
We discuss dating in our 40s and how it is oh so different from our 20s and 30s, not giving up on the idea of family (a partner with kids, adoption, etc), connecting with people in REAL LIFE instead of endless swiping #exhausting, and the dreaded surprise “set-up” from friends.
Dave, this episodes’ Voice of the Patriarchy, asks a great question about how women may feel about dating a certain type of partner, also joins us...2018-11-2023 minHashtag SingleEP 2: BRING BACK FLIRTING | Daliya KarnofskyThis episode is super special as we recorded it live in NYC at our launch party event last month. To celebrate the introduction of #single into the podcast universe we threw a fundraiser event at a champagne speakeasy with flash tattoos and a killer raffle. The headliner was a very special guest visiting from LA, Miss Daliya Karnofsky.
Daliya is both a personal dating coach and successful concierge with Matchmakers in the City. Traci & I interviewed her about the themes that constantly show up in her coaching with her clients, and then opened it up to a Q&A...2018-11-0628 minHashtag SingleEP 1: DON'T SEND US DICK PICSMeet your hosts Jeanette & Traci!
For our very first episode we thought we'd introduce ourselves to you, tell you a little bit where we're at in our dating history, and admit a coupla things that really get our goat. Do we address unsolicited dick pics in our very first episode? . . . Yup. Yup, we do.
A little note about the Voice of the Patriarchy. In case you didn't listen to our trailer (we know, you're short on time, you wanted to get to the juicy stuff), let us explain. It was important to us fr...2018-10-2324 minHashtag Single#single Trailer: Why'd We Make This Thing Anyway?Hello & welcome to #single! We're so glad you're here.
The idea for this podcast came about because Jeanette (single for ten years, #notashamed) was writing posts on Facebook to voice her frustrations around dating - laughably awful dates, being stood up, trashy inbox messages and pictures, etc - and would finish each post with hashtag “single” –a bit of an ironic joke at the end and also summed everything up nicely. You’d be surprised at the way people will rally around bad dating stories! The comment “You should write a book!” kept coming up.
...2018-10-2304 min