Shows
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating94. Are AI Girlfriends Cheating? The ChatGPT SchmoopieGuest co-host Jenny aka the Happy Hausfrau blogger and Tracy snark about the guy who proposed marriage to his ChatGPT girlfriend, but not his live-in girlfriend and mother of his child. Are ChatGPT paramours the new frontier in AI cheating? How narcissistic is it to have a programmable girlfriend? 2025-07-2213 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating93. Crazy Cheater Reactions to Being CaughtYou never know what kind of reaction you'll get when you confront a cheater. On the one hand are the stone cold freaks with no adaptive anxiety. They lean into their lies and never break a sweat. Even in the face of hard evidence. Alternatively, are the cheaters who completely lose their composure. To the guy who had a meltdown and hopped away in a sleeping bag, to others who feign psychiatric crises. In this episode we hear about your cheaters' craziest reactions to being busted. 2025-07-0818 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating92. What Else Didn't You Know About?Besides the cheating, what else didn't you know about? Listeners tell us the details of their cheaters double lives beyond the sex. The missing monies. The hooker habit. An entire other family. Where there's one secret, you may find others. 2025-06-2427 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating91. Reconciliation and the Dave Grohl Baby Mama DramaIn this episode Tracy gives her take on the news that Dave Grohl and his wife Jordyn Blum have decided to reconcile. While Grohl simultaneously has committed himself to being a "hands on" father with his daughter by his affair partner. Could we please change the discourse that single parents aren't family enough? And stop the assumption that everyone needs the FW in their lives? Just cash the check and live your own life.2025-06-1716 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating90. Her Husband Swears He Isn't Gay, He Just Cheats with MenTracy and Sarah respond to a listener's dilemma about her husband. He's cheating with men, but swears he's not gay. She's trying to get him into sex addiction therapy. Also, a Fuckwit of the Week submission -- exotic vacations discoveries to which you weren't invited.2025-06-1015 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating89. Should You Tell the Children About the Affair?In this episode, we react to an atrocious column in the New York Times by therapist Lori Gottlieb, where a woman asks if she should be honest with her children about their father's cheating and the resulting divorce. Gottlieb shames the woman for even considering speaking of her betrayal and defers to the man's narrative instead. (You drove him to it.) Sarah and Tracy weigh in. 2025-06-0325 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating88. Stupid Cheater Life PlansDid you thwart a cheater's happiness? Are you the obstacle to their greatness? In this episode Tracy and Sarah explore stupid cheater life plans. The grass is always greener on the other side of whatever they committed to. Including you. Listeners share the impulsive schemes and dreams, the alpaca farm, the missionary job that wasn't, and the lost opportunity to be a kiteboarder. 2025-05-2832 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating87. Worst Reconciliation Advice You GotIf you just discovered your partner cheating, chances are you got some common reconciliaton advice like "Wait 6 months before you make a decision." Or "Don't tell anyone." Or moronic warnings about "affair fog." (They know not what they do! Maybe if you wait patiently they'll return to you and it will Make Your Marriage Stronger!) In this episode, listeners tell us the worst, victim-blaming, nonsensical advice they got after D-Day. 2025-05-2038 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating86. Stop Labeling Partners of Sex Addicts "Codependent" - An Interview with Diane StricklandIn this re-edited interview, we talk with trauma specialist Diane Strickland and creator of the site yourstoryissafehere.com about sex addiction and partners being labeled "codependent." Why women are shamed for their anger. And much more.2025-05-1331 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating85. Sexually Deceptive People -- An Interview with Dr. Omar MinwallaIn this re-edited version of an earlier recording, Sarah and Tracy spoke with Dr. Omar Minwalla, a therapist who is known for his work "The Secret Sexual Basement." He sees infidelity as abusive and a sexual deception problem, which makes him something of an outlier in the therapy community. We talk about his model, infidelity as abuse, and how to change the narrative with mental health professionals.2025-05-0648 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating84. Affair Proofing Your Marriage and Andrew G. MarshallIn this re-edited version of an early broadcast, Tracy and Sarah challenge therapist Andrew G. Marshall on his promise that marriages can be affair-proofed. Did he say that? Was he taken out of context when he told women that they must apologize to their unfaithful husbands? 2025-04-2942 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating83. The Weirdest Things Cheaters Wanted in the Divorce or Breakup In this episode we hear about all the imponderable things cheaters wanted in the breakup. Not real estate, or children, or sentimental items. But weird stuff, like flooring tiles they'll never use. Or that book on West Virginia coal mining. Or your grandmother's dining room set. Is it spite? Are they clueless? Tracy and Sarah react to your many submissions. 2025-04-2234 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating82. The Jesus Cheater Who Thought She'd "Fight" for HimIn this short episode, Tracy and Sarah respond to a letter from a woman who's husband was astounded that after decades of marriage she left him. He was a church deacon, a Jesus cheater, with a double life. As she left, he told her "I thought you'd fight harder for me."2025-04-1808 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating81. Who Was Your Infidelity Angel?Keeping on the theme of good people, we asked listeners who helped them get through infidelity? Who was their guiding angel? A stranger, family member, friend? Cheaters might destroy your trust in humanity, but others renew your faith. 2025-04-0822 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating80. Random Acts of KindnessWe asked listeners -- what random act of kindness moved you after you were chumped? Tracy tells about her mysterious breakfast benefactor and Sarah shares a story about the time her car broke down. We hear about infidelity angels and kind strangers who appeared at just the right time with encouragement and support. A departure from the usual look at bad actors, this week we celebrate good people. 2025-04-0129 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating79. Does My Husband Have Another Wife?Tracy and Sarah answer your letters including one from a woman who discovered her husband was telling people online that she was dead and referred to another woman and their child as "wife and daughter." Is this a game to him? Is he cheating? Or is this guy a sociopath? Another listener wonders what chumps would do differently if they knew about the cheating sooner. 2025-03-2415 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating78. F*ckwits of the Week This week we asked what your FWs were up to. Of course, the goal is meh, but some of us are still coparenting, or in the midst of divorce, or news of their misadventures travels back. Often with a large dose of schadenfreude and gratitude that these folks are no longer our problem. Aggravating, in trouble with the law, irresponsible... they didn't get character transplants. 2025-03-1833 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating77. Mind Movies and Rumination After InfidelityPart of the trauma after infidelity is rumination. The endless mind movies reliving what you know and, worse, imagining what you don’t. In this episode, listeners tell us how they dealt with the endless intrusive thoughts. What therapies worked, who helped, and how they diverted their attention elsewhere. (True crime podcasts anyone?) 2025-03-1134 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating76. Aunties on the Bench: Advice from Chumps to the Newly BetrayedWhat advice would you give a new chump knowning what you know now? We heard from many listeners who had hard-won advice for the newly betrayed. How to choose who you tell, to focusing on self-protecting over reconciliation, and deep regrets about pick-me dancing. Who better to tell you than the people who lived it? The idea for the episode was taken from the mental health nonprofit Friendship Bench. It's an organization that started in Zimbabwe to help people who were struggling with depression. They trained a league of older women to sit on public park benches...2025-02-1830 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating75. Cheater Non-Apology Apologies"I'm sorry, but you didn't like octopus," is among the more ridiculous apologies a cheater has given for being unfaithful. In this episode, Tracy and Sarah react to your submissions for lamest non-apology apologies you received. The sad sausages for whom this hurts them too, more really. Those whose only crime was wanting happiness, and how can you fault happiness? To the clueless ones who didn't realize cheating would hurt you. That wasn't their intention! So sorry (not sorry)!2025-02-1129 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating74. How to Be a Supportive Friend to Someone Who Was Cheated OnSarah and Tracy answer a letter from a listener wondering how she can be a supportive friend to someone who is in an abusive marriage with a cheater. When should you worry about your own personal safety, or call child services? Is there anything you can do beyond standing by and listening? 2025-02-0421 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating73. Coercive Controllers -- An Interview with Dr. Emma KatzTracy talks with domestic violence researcher Dr. Emma Katz about her book, "Coercive Control in Children's and Mothers' Lives." Many recognize violent behavior as transgressive, but more common abuse tactics fall under coercive control -- intimidatation, humiliation, isolation. The abuser's goal is to preserve their entitlement by breaking down their victim/partner's emotional state to greater depths of vulnerability and dependence. Dr. Katz's book, published by Oxford University Press, is the first child-centric exploration of this topic. She discusses not only the damange abuser's can do, but also – most importantly – how people have broken free and their mighty...2025-01-2854 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating72. She's 7 Months Pregnant and Caught Her Husband SextingSarah and Tracy respond to a letter from a woman who discovered her husband is sexting and on dating site while she is 7 months pregnant. She thinks he has an addiction to the validation, but still loves her. It's just that he starts cheating and gets checked out. Should she move in with her parents? She wants to know how she can be mighty now, when she feels very vulnerable. 2025-01-2123 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating71. Why Can't I Leave Him?Tracy responds to a woman, Beth, who writes in to say she can't seem to leave her partner even though she's deeply unhappy. She has shady, circumstantial evidence of cheating, but hasn't caught him. But meanwhile he's inappropriate with other women and has a porn addiction. She's not financially dependent on him, so what exactly is keeping her stuck? 2025-01-0215 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating70. Holiday Traditions You Don't MissSarah and Tracy learn what holiday traditions you don't miss from your cheating exes. From obnoxious mother-in-law gifted decor, to the ex who threw a fully lit Christmas tree in a fit of rage. What are you thrilled to no longer live with and what new traditions did you replace the old ones with? 2024-12-3131 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating69. Stupid Things People Say When You've Been Cheated OnPeople say the most insensitive things when they learn you've been cheated on. Everything from the cliched "It takes two to tango" or "No one knows what goes on in a marriage" to the straight-up victim blaming of "you didn't give him enough sex." Or the self-congratulation of "I'm glad my husband would never cheat on me." Tracy and Sarah react to your gobsmacking submissions. 2024-12-2440 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating68. Holiday Cheater StoriesIt's time again for your holiday cheater stories. The terrible gifts, the discoveries, the yuletide double lives... Tracy and Sarah react to your FW tales. Go into the new year knowing -- you are so much better off without these freaks in your life.2024-12-1741 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating67. The Unknowing Other Woman and Her ChildA listener calls in to discuss being an unknowing Other Woman. Her cheater had three other families, as it turns out, including her child. She asks for understanding for those in complicated family situations. Children of cheaters are victims too. 2024-12-1019 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating66. Gender Bias in Family Court: An Interview with Dr. Christine Cocchiola and Amy PolackoIn this interview with therapist Dr. Christine Cocchiola and investigative journalist Amy Polacko we discuss gender bias in family court. Both women have experienced domestic violence and in their book Framed, they shared the stories of women whose abusers weaponized the legal system against them in divorce and custody fights. Cocchiola and Polacko give pointers on what to look for before you get involved with these characters and how you can protect yourself. 2024-12-0342 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating65. The Widow's Guide to Dead Bastards: An Interview with Jessica WaiteAfter Jessica Waite's husband suddenly died of a heart attack, she discovered the extent of his double life -- long-term affairs, prostitutes, debt and drug use. In her memoir, "The Widow's Guide to Dead Bastards" she describes how she survived this devastating betrayal, came to terms with her late husband's memory, raised their son alone, and rebuilt her life. She discusses with Tracy how she decided to not keep his secrets and voiced her own truth instead. 2024-11-2644 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating64. 10 Ways to Cope When Jerks WinTracy, as Chump Lady, has made quite a study of overcoming oppressive jerks. In this recorded pep talk, she expands on a recent blog post she wrote on how to eat the shit sandwich of injustice and keep on going. 2024-11-1918 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating63. What Did You Replace Your Cheater With?A woman writes to say she swapped her cheating husband for a Roomba. Her new appliance vacuums, never gaslights her, and comes back to its home port every night. We asked: What did you replace your cheater with? We've got upgrades of every kind. And cats. A lot of cats. 2024-11-1228 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating62. How Did You Discover the Cheating?Listeners discuss how they discovered their partners were cheating. From putting spy apps on a phone, to the idiot who forgot the Ring camera was recording, to the cheater who inadvertently alerted the private investigator to what car his Schmoopie drives. Sarah and Tracy react to the cheater hijinks and how cheaters underestimate their chumps.2024-10-2950 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating61. 'Cheating Is Abuse,' An Interview with Nell HudsonTracy talks with writer and actress Nell Hudson about her eight-year relationship with a man who had a double life -- which she discovered on their anniversary. What he excused as another woman's infatuation with him, turned out to be an entire history of serial cheating with multiple partners. Tracy and Nell discuss the cultural narratives around infidelity, why we don't call it abuse, and what it means to be a feminist and a chump. 2024-10-221h 01Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating60. What If You Can't Escape the Affair Partner?In this episode, Sarah and Tracy react to a letter from a woman who lives in the same small town as her ex and the affair partner -- her former friend. Worse, she has to interact with this person at her job. What's the answer? Move away or learn how to coexist? We also hear from two listeners, one with a red flag story on lying, and a mighty single dad who's crushing the sane parenting gig.2024-10-1524 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating59. Red Flags of CheatingThe furtive bathroom visits with the cell phone, strange moods, and bizzare accusations that you're cheating -- in this episode we look at all the red flags that you're with a cheater. Hindsight is 20/20, but when you look back, what were the signs? 2024-10-0837 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating58. Did Anyone Get Pregnant During the Affair?In this episode, we discuss the intersection of pregnancy and infidelity. The mistresses who got pregnant. The chumps who got cheated on while pregnant, or going through fertility treatments. The guy chumps who had to paternity test their kids. The "OMG I think I'm pregnant" Hail Mary play by mistresses to win the pick me dance. How children of affairs navigate the complicated stories of their parents. DNA surprises, half-siblings. We get into all the messiness of FWs who reproduce. 2024-10-0130 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating57. Who Else Did You Lose in the Divorce/Breakup?When you lost a cheater, who else did you lose in the breakup? People often think infidelity is just a private matter between a couple, and not a larger conspiracy, as it often turns out to be. In the end, you may lose “friends” who were affair partners, those who knew and didn’t tell you, and the Switzerland folks who don’t want to take sides. Listeners share their stories of who they lost, who they culled, and who they don't miss. 2024-09-2439 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating56. Should You Confront an Affair Partner?A woman writes in to Tracy and Sarah after suspecting that her best friend has been cheating with her now ex-husband. This friend has been cagey, unsupportive, and just admitted that she's been a cheater before. The letter writer wants to confront her friend about her behavior, but should she? Would it be better to ghost her instead? Or let it blow over? 2024-09-1724 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating55. Cheating Tropes and How to Defang ThemWith the recent buzz about Chump Nation in the New Yorker and the Cut, Tracy takes on the haters. Consider it a teaching opportunity. Here's three common infidelity tropes and how to defang them: Bothsiderism (What did you do to make them cheat?); Infidelity is complex (You're a black and white thinker); and Quit Playing the Victim (You're too bitter and emotional). 2024-09-1020 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating54. The Walls In Your House Will SingTracy talks with her 83-year old Aunt Joy about what it was like to divorce a cheater in the 1970s. A time when women couldn't get credit without their husbands' signatures, had no workplace protections, and being a single mother was considered a personal failure. Aunt Joy is famous on the Chump Lady blog for the expression "the walls in your house will sing" -- that feeling of freedom and relief when you get a toxic person out of your life. Aunt Joy shares how she rebuilt, married a fellow chump, raised a blended family, became a caregiver for 14...2024-09-0353 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating53. Those Who Didn't 'Stay Together for the Children'We hear from listeners who didn't stay together for the children (or weren't able to, because one parent abandoned ship), and who raised children on their own. Despite the single parent doom and gloom warnings, the kids turned out great and homelife is peaceful. If you're in the trenches of single parenting, this episode is for you. Take it from two single moms -- (Tracy formerly, Sarah presently) -- you've got this. 2024-08-2746 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating52. D-Day Two Months After the WeddingShe got married two months ago, only to discover her new husband has been cheating with his colleague -- her friend. He wants to go to Italy with the Other Woman to "explore his feelings" and wants her to wait for him. Instead, she moved out and remains heartbroken. "How can someone you love treat you this way?" Tracy and Sarah react to this guy's mindfuckery and entitlement. And the treachery of the OW. 2024-08-2029 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating51. Stupid Things Cheaters Say, Part 2So many stupid things cheaters say, it warranted a second podcast of your submissions. The Other Woman who is "rooting" for the chump's marriage. The introspective cheater who sighs, "I just don't know how to love..." The minimization of "Hey, I'm not an axe murderer." All the stupid right here. Again. 2024-08-1338 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating50. Stupid Things Cheaters SayCheaters say the darndest things. In this episode, Sarah and Tracy react to your Stupid Sh*t Cheaters Say submissions. The suggestion that you would like the affair partner if you only knew them. The sad sausage bleatings. The cruelty of your consequences. How could you?!2024-08-0631 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating49. How Did You Pick Me Dance to Win a Cheater?How pretty did you pick me dance to win a cheater? Did you lose weight? Up your sex game? Spend less time with the children? Were you aware you were in a life or death pick me spiral with Schmoopie, or did you sense it? In this episode, Sarah and Tracy react to your pick me dance stories shared on voicemail and social media. (We picked you!) 2024-07-2333 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating48. Fesshole Cheater Confessions: An Interview with Rob ManuelRob Manuel is the creator of the social media phenomenon FessHole, where people anonymously share their darkest, most mortifying secrets. In this episode, Rob's curated his best cheater (and wannabe cheater) confessions. The dead bedroom cheaters. The woman who wants someone to come clean her house. The guy who wants his partner to cheat on him because he's too gutless to dump his girlfriend honestly. Sarah and Tracy weigh in. Need more secrets? Check out Fesshole The Podcast.2024-07-111h 07Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating47. A Cheater Asks for AdviceA self-professed cheater leaves Sarah and Tracy a voicemail asking how he can make amends for being unfaithful. He doesn't wish to reconcile -- they're going to divorce. But how can he rehabilitate his image going forward as co-parents. Tracy offers some thoughts on how to kick the entitlement habit and Sarah provides the sobering, yet friendly, cynicism that this advice probably will not be followed. 2024-07-0914 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating46. Liars: An Interview with Sarah MangusoSarah Manguso has written the ultimate chump novel: Liars. Jane is a woman who endures marriage to, and divorce from, a textbook fuckwit. It dramatizes marital betrayal, narcissistic abuse, and coercive control in a way we all know deep in our bones. Manguso says, "It’s a novel, so of course it’s all fiction—except for the parts that are true." During the pandemic, Manguso's cheating husband abandoned her and their son. It became fodder for Liars. She the author of nine books, most recently the novel Very Cold People. Liars, is forthcom...2024-07-0250 min
Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating45. I Should've Left When...Was there a moment in your relationship, before you knew about the cheating, in which you look back and regret not leaving then? In this episode, listeners answer that question. The casual cruelities. The weird absences. The disconnect from family life. And the double lives that are later revealed that make sense of it all. 2024-06-2543 minTell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating44. "It's Not the Sex, It's the Deception" - The Untold Stories of the Ashley Madison DocumentaryJake and Christine saw an announcement on the Chump Lady site for people who were impacted by the Ashely Madison hack scandal. The were both filmed for the Netflix documentary, but their stories of leaving cheaters and overcoming betrayal were not included. Jake's wife had multiple affairs on the site, and he found out when one of the affair partners contacted him. Christine discovered her boyfriend's double life and then catfished him on the dating site. These are their stories. The ones that don't end in reconciliation. 2024-06-181h 22Tell Me How You're Mighty: Real Talk About Cheating43. Sarah's Take on the Ashley Madison Netflix DocumentaryFollowing up from last week's episode, Sarah weighs in on her observations (and revulsions) on the Ashley Madison Neflix series. Is it possible this many serial cheaters exist? Does that guy in the pink flamingo shirt sunning himself by the poolside have any conscience? Is Noel Biderman's wife a chump or an accomplice? It's a deep vein of snark and commentary.2024-06-1138 min
The Reinvention EraEP41 Ditching the Cheater: The Playbook from The Chump LadySend us a textIn this episode of The Divorce Chapter podcast, we talk through an overview of the hugely impactful book "Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life" by Tracy Schorn, aka Chump Lady. You can find the book here:http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/0762458968/ref=nosim?tag=thedivorceb00-21This book was highlighted in the Divorce Book Club in May and is an utterly invaluable resource for those dealing with infidelity.What You'll Learn:📚 Key Term...2024-06-0726 min