Shows
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - Plymouth Adventure (1952)Folks, the Balcony is closed for a little bit so enjoy a couple of weeks of goldie oldies and then we'll be back with Gandhi eventually!
Gobble, gobble, you flippin Puritans. It's the busiest travel day of the year and the Balcony Boys have got you covered with a turkey that even the most benevolent of US Presidents couldn't pardon. Yes, friends, it's time we travel all the way back to 1952 and take a look at Plymouth Adventure, a film that can only be described as "completely inaccurate" and "very boring." Sexier than the...2022-11-231h 01
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - The Witch (2015)Hark weary time traveler! We're taking a couple weeks off cause we're exceptionally lazy! So enjoy the VVitch this week and some other shit next week and then we'll be back for Gandhi someday!
Do you want to live.... balcony-ly? Boys and girls, grab your pitchforks and your other things that you carry on a witch hunt cause we found the 2015 trip into madness, the Witch! Robert Eggers, you crazy for this one. Join the screen debut probably of the world's greatest living actor, Harvey Scrimshaw and travel to just outside old Plimoth Colony...2022-11-021h 10
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - The Stepford Wives (1975)Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove is in the air as in Sean is in looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove with this week's movie. Holy moly. If you don't like the hornier episodes of the Balcony, turn back now. Today, we watched the 1970s cult classic, The Stepford Wives. Get your Matthew Broderick 2000s remake the hell out of here. We took the delorean back to 1975 and frankly, Sean is never leaving. Bill left. What do you think of when you hear Disneyland robot? Grover Cleveland? I genuinely hate trying to write these things up every week but it would look stupid if there was nothing here right? Right...2022-09-071h 16
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - The Deer Hunter (1979)Ladies and gentlemen, we've finally reached the end of our month long celebration of the damn life and work of what we can confidently call the most unsung actor from New England, John Motherfucking Cazale. Five movies, all absolute bangers. Today, it's the 1979 Best Picture winner, The Deer Hunter, arguably the greatest movie about Vietnam and according to Bill, maybe of all time. We sing, we dance, we have a swell ass time.
Also stay tuned to the end of the podcast for a big announcement regarding the damn future of the Balcony.2022-08-311h 37
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - Mermaids (1990)If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, listen to this podcast like its your wife. From my personal point of view, this is a podcast to listen to. MERMAIDS! This week in the balcony, we're splashing around with Cher, Winona, Bobby, and the gang and we're talking MERMAIDS, a movie so nice they had three directors. Did you know that? Well you will in the next 90 minutes. We get into this charming little picture and sing a whole bunch. I can't remember what else happens but who cares? Listen, rate, review, and don't go up in...2022-08-101h 34
Two Boys in a BalconyA Balcony Classic - Dog Day Afternoon (1975)It's Cazalentine's Week 3 and it's the afternoon and the day is dog so it's Dog Day Afternoon. It's very good! (Please note: Two Boys in a Balcony, the award watching New England film podcast does not condone or encourage bank robberies of any kind but also acknowledges that we're not your dad. We can't tell you what to do with your life. If you want to rob a bank, we're not going to be happy about it but we still love you. Do you understand that? We still love you. We just want you to make better choices. I know...2022-08-011h 34
Two Boys in a BalconyA Balcony Classic - Jaws (1975)You're gonna need a bigger balcony2022-07-291h 26
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - Cazalentin'e 2021 Week Two - The Conversation (1974)It's Week Two of Cazalentine's and we're back with FFC for his 1974 Best Picture LOSER, The Conversation (it lost to the Godfather Part II so I bet there's no hard feelings). This is a dang gem of a flick with peak HACKMAN BABY! Gather round, young friends, and listen to a conversation about the Conversation. I hate writing these blurbs.2022-07-271h 26
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - The Godfather Trilogy (Cazalentine's Week 1)Ladies and gentlemen have we got an offer for you that you can't refuse! It's week 1 of Cazalentine's, our month long celebration of the greatest son of Revere, Massachusetts John Cazale! The man made 5 movies, killed it in each and every single one, and all five movies were nominated for Best Picture and 3 of the movies went on to win (The Conversations didn't win because the Godfather 2 did! Two Best pictures nominations in one year!) How could we not dedicate a month to this incredible man!
Today, we watched approx 10 hours of film for you. The Godfather, The Godfather Part II...2022-07-132h 09
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - The Cider House Rules (1999)Hey there! It's me, Sean, from the future, bringing you an episode from the past! We were supposed to record an episode about the best picture winning film, the French Connection, but everything feels bad right now and talking about one of the worst cops of all time didn't sound like it was going to make us feel any better about anything so here's an old episode on the movie the Cider House Rules. We don't have a patreon but if you wanted to throw a couple bucks to the Eastern Massachusetts Abortion Fund at https://emafund.org/ that...2022-06-291h 43
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - Love Story (1970)Love means never having to watch this wretched movie again. It's Two Boys in a Balcony and in the immortal words of J Geils and Peter Wolf.... love (story) stinks.2022-06-151h 34
Two Boys in a BalconyA Balcony Classic - Those Calloways (1965)hey folks. Look. We really did try to record a new episode this week but when Sean got to Bill’s, his laptop decided that was the time to do a one hour update. then, and this is 100 percent truth (we have the local facebook group screenshots to prove it) the entire town of Whitman MA last power just as Sean had finished getting everything ready. I wish I was joking because it was freaky. Anyway here’s an old one about a Disney movie about ducks that are not mighty nor Donald.
Quack! Quack! The Balc...2022-05-041h 28
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? (1966)Last rerun unless we fuck up again next week!
It's the swing dinging 60s! yeah baby! Do I make you horny? Behave. This week in the Balcony, the boys are diving headfirst into a movie that they are too dumb to love so much but love, love they do. It's Mike Nichols's Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf and down boy down. Everybody is hot and bothered. Sorry the episode went up late. Sean got that moderna good good yesterday and has been an absolute force to be reckoned with. WATCH OUT FOLKS! THE BALCONY IS ALMOST 100% VACCINATED...2022-04-201h 28
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - On Golden PondIt's sweeps month in the Balcony apparently! Because of a combination of allergies, travel, and general incompetence, the Boys are having to throw up some classic Balcony eps for the next couple weeks. But fear not... we'll be back with My Fair Lady soon enough! God Bless!
Unswamp that canoe cause the Balcony boys packed a picnic and they're headed to the richest body a water this side of the Mississippi that is also in New Hampshire, On Golden Pond or maybe Golden Pond. Is the "On" part of the name of the pond...2022-04-131h 24
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - The Shawshank Redemption (1994)Sean feels like shit. Here's an oldie:
This week we reach 50 episodes which can only mean one thing: corporate buy-out time! That's right! Two Boys in a Balcony has been officially purchased by Turner Broadcasting Services which means we finally get to talk about the most watched program in the history of TNT... no not Franklin and Basch... no not Rizzoli and Isles.... we're talking about the motherfucking SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION SONS AND DAUGHTERS! It's your dad's favorite prison drama if your dad watched TV on a rainy saturday afternoon when he couldn't mow the lawn. I'm sorry. I...2022-04-061h 23
Two Boys in a BalconyBalcony Classic - The Family Stone (2005)There's only seven more shopping days (probably) till Christmas and luckily for you there's just as many children in the Family Stone and the Balcony Boys are there to walk you through this yuletide reunion. What a goddamn poet I am. We're so close to Christmas. This is a McMorrow family favorite and a Sullivan family "When did we see that? In 2005? Jesus Christ what happened to our youth?" Anyway, it's more fun than sleeping in a twin bed in your parent's attic with your brother's fiance. Turns out, this is kind of a crazy movie. Anyway. The Family Stone...2021-12-291h 23
Two Boys in a BalconyBlown Away (1994)We're winding down our run of New England films with the most cucked about film of 1994, Blown Away! Oh your finale is about a car with a bomb that will go off if the driver applies the brakes? Hold me motor oil, said Speed. Holy hell. Watch speed. Listen to us. It's a fun one!2021-04-141h 30
Two Boys in a BalconyClue (1985)Ladies and gentlemen, there has been a MURDER in the Balcony. WHODUNIT FOLKS?? Was it Mr Jaundice with the bootleg Moderna in the ATRIUM?! Was it Mrs Puce with JNCO jeans in the LAUNDRENETTE?!?! OR was it THE BALCONY BOYS IN THE BALCONY WITH LAUGHS?!?!?!?! It was Mrs Puce. We are still looking for motive however investigators discovered she'd recently watched the 1985 murder comedy Clue. Ok. Bye.2021-04-071h 17
Two Boys in a BalconyFever Pitch (2005)Bill: Well Sean, I'm going to Boston with you. You know The Guy Who Manages The Red Sox, the Red Sox's manager, gave me a job as coach for as long as you're on the team.
Sean: Look Bill, if you're the coach, you must know all the players.
Bill: I certainly do.
Sean: Well you know I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team.
Bill: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these ball players now-a-days very p...2021-03-311h 37
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Skulls (2000)Look we all know that Bush did 9/11 but was it all just retaliation for the 2000 expose the Skulls peeling back the secrets of the clandestine Yale group? Who can really say? All I know is that ever since I wrote that sentence my wifi has stopped working and a giant Q popped up on my screen. Oh well! That's what I get for not keeping my virus software up to date!2021-03-241h 35
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Next Karate Kid (1994)With karate, I'll kick your ass from here to right over there. Ladies and gentlemen, this movie stinks. We're sorry. It's why we're switching over to Best Picture winners because even when a Best Picture winner sucks, it's at least-awarding winning as opposed to the Next Karate Kid which is bad. Anywho, stick around for the end for the debut of Bill McMorrow Esq's new hit single, Karate!, a real song that he probably even wrote!2021-03-101h 38
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Boston Strangler (1968)Ladies and gentlemen, have we got a flippin flick for you today! In the two years, we've been doing this podcast, we've scoured lists upon lists of the best New England films and for what ever reason, this one never pops up but if you're looking for forensic crime films in the vein of Zodiac and another example that I can't think of, then check out this true crime drama, the Boston Strangler starring Henry Fonda and Tony Curtis. It's both a bone dry crime scene investigation and a weird surreal late 60s trip. It rules. I wish it was...2021-03-031h 25
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Dead Zone (1983)Ladies and gentlemen, today, the balcony gives you a choice... a weapon of choice if you will... if you could touch my hand and see that you're about to have an hour and fifteen minutes of fun time, party boy riffs, would you still try to assassinate the two boys in the balcony? No. You wouldn't. It's the Dead Zone with Christopher Walken! Don't worry... at no point do either boy make it even close to a Christopher Walken impression!2021-01-201h 17
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Finest Hours (2016)Ahoy! Today the Balcony Boys are dipping their toes back into the GCU (the Gillespie Cinematic Universe) to look at I, Tonya director Craig Gillespie's 2016 totally fine, the Finest Hours, a movie that Bill swears he saw rushing the Capital Steps during the failed insurrection and thus he would see hung for treason but Sean knows is just a perfectly fine watchable movie about a ship sinking or something. It's wet!2021-01-131h 22
Two Boys in a BalconyI, Tonya (2017)Whoa ho! It's a New Year! New Pod! The boys have had I, Tonya on the schedule for awhile now and since we have no confidence in the 2020 Winter Olympics actually happening in 2021, we figured no time like the present to watch 2017's I, Tonya, the Tonya Harding biopic anchored with four absolutely killer performances. It's a good one. Enjoy.2021-01-061h 15
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Best of Times (1986)What ho! Has a Charles Dickens references crept over into the Balcony? Are the boys becoming hardcore Dickheads or did they just watch a steaming pile of Christmas pudding this week from 1986 called the Best of Times. The Best of Times it certainly wasn't! Gene Shalit! It stinks! Jay Sherman! We end Russellmania season on the worst of notes because instead of this we could have watched Used Cars, The Thing, Overboard, Captain Ron, Escape from New York, Escape from LA, Guardians of the Galaxy 2, Once Upon A Time in Hollywood, The Hateful 8, Furious 7, F8te of the Furious, 3000 Miles...2020-12-301h 00
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Christmas Chronicles (2018)/The Christmas Chronicles 2 (2020)Ho ho ho and a bottle of rum! The Balcony boys are feeling festive and celebrating the reason for the season, KURT RUSSELL, who incredibly has cemented himself as one of the all-time great cinematic Santas with the very charming and fun 2018 Netflix original film The Christmas Chronicles! What a romp! The story of a family of true believers accidentally ruining Christmas and then having the wherewithal to set things straight? It'll warm the dead cockles of your heart!
The Christmas Chronicles 2, on the other hand, sucks all the shit and should be avoided at all costs! It's a Balcony...2020-12-231h 11
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Computer Wore Tennis Shoes (1969)Beep boop beep boop the podcast wore podcast pods! It's week three of Russelmania or Kurt Russmas or the month where we watch a bunch of Kurt Russell movies cause who cares anymore? Springfield's most famous son (go f yourself, Doctor Suess). It's baby Kurt week cause we watched the Computer Wore Tennis Shoes a movie that posits that computers make you smarter but I would suggest watching this movie made me dumber. Hi. I am Sean Sullivan from Two Boys in a Balcony and I no joke think I fell asleep at one point during this episode. Bill says...2020-12-161h 08
Two Boys in a BalconyBig Trouble in Little China (1986)Folks, Sean here. I've been doing goddamn daily podcasts everyday and I'm going insane. Yes, Bill, I forgot to put in the theme song. No, Bill, I probably can't fix it right now. Sorry. I needed to get a little business out of the way to let Bill know I forgot to put in the theme. ANYWHO WHAM BAM THANK YOU MAM CAN I HAVE ANOTHER! It's Big Trouble in Little China week here in the Balcony and boy howdy did this thing sail clean over our heads. Good luck!2020-12-091h 12
Two Boys in a BalconyMiracle (2004)About six months ago, one of the idiots of this show discovered that beloved human actor Kurt Russell was born in Springfield, Massachusetts and he is now forever our favorite son and we have decided to dedicate this last month of this especially shitty year to only watching his movies and we kicked things off with a patriotic banger! Miracle tells the origin story of a bunch of Wall Street scumbums and how they single handedly prevented nuclear war. It's a heart-warming tale that even Sean, a man who hates hockey, got sucked into. It's emotionally manipulative filmmaking at it's...2020-12-021h 11
Two Boys in a BalconyJFK (1991)If you came hear looking for a scholarly dissection of Oliver Stone's paranoid masterpiece JFK, KEEP ON TRUCKIN' SISTER CAUSE THIS AINT THE PLACE! However if you'd love to hear two idiots talk around a three hour movie about the assassination of John Fitzgerald Kennedy, we might be able to do a little business together. Was it the Cubans? Was it the CIA? Was it the gay legitimate businessmen of New Orleans? Why not all three and more! Everyone's a killer in this beautiful thing except Bill and Sean. Their alibis are airtight.2020-11-251h 33
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Iron Giant (1999)Party over, oops, out of time, we're watching a cartoon from NINETEEN NINETY NINE! Crunch crunch creak creak It's the big iron giant boy, the Iron Giant directed by the great Brad Bird. It's a movie about beatniks and single moms, nuclear proliferation and the troubles of domesticating squirrels. It's got everything want from a movie and it is good so watch it and then listen to us and mind the mess, people. We're not professionals.2020-11-181h 23
Two Boys in a BalconyQuiz Show (1994)Whoa there Quiz Kid Donnie Smith! For $25,000 dollars, what 1994 directorial debut did the Balcony Boys dreamily discuss for very long in the final tumultuous days of the American experiment? Time's up! It's Quiz Show directed by Robert Redford, a fact we almost certainly forgot to discuss in any significant detail. Look if you want facts, read a wikipedia. If you want America's Dumbest Film Critics, listen to the Balcony. And as a bonus, the boys finally reveal their true forms: morally bankrupt cretins who would absolutely cheat on a game show given any opportunity! Come on down! You're the next...2020-11-111h 22
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Trouble with Harry (1955)Here's the deal, jack. On the eve of one of the darkest days in American history, Bill and Sean hooked up the dang pod machines and recorded an episode on Alfred Hitchcock's 1955 comedy, The Trouble with Harry. Sean was tripping balls on claritin the whole time. Bill was tripping on his balls the whole time. Sean also tripped over Bill's balls once or twice or three or four times EACH TIME FUNNIER THAN THE LAST! Don't read and walk at the same time, folks! We don't know if the bombs have started falling but by the time you listen to...2020-11-041h 22
Two Boys in a BalconyChild's Play (1988) - LIVE at HOME with WILL SMALLEY and ANDREW MAYER!Dearly beloved, we gather here today to cast another Boo Englund into Bill's Soul Pit for another year and helping us we've got the goodest buddies Will Smalley and Andrew Mayer to help us shuffle off this mortal coil. We gathered on Bill's 50th flipping birthday to watch the original Child's Play from 1988. Sean and Andrew had never seen it so Bill and Will pretended to hold their hands to guide them through this baby murder doll story! Good times abound!2020-10-301h 23
Two Boys in a BalconyHubie Halloween (2020)Gather round for a most harrowing tale of a mentally ill man who just wants you to be safe on Halloween. That's right, folks, we called another audible and instead of whatever bullshit we said we were watching, we watched the newest Netflix original Sandman production, Hubie Halloween! AND TRUST US... we get into it! We certainly don't spend the entire episode talking about other horror movies like Borat Subsequent Moviefilm or One Cut of the Dead, a Japanese zombie comedy that we realized we couldn't actually discuss without ruining all the wonderful surprises. Anyway, this the premiere episode for...2020-10-281h 12
Two Boys in a BalconyA Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) - LIVE at HOME with MARK GALLAGHER! (the sound sucks... sorry!)I KNOW! I threw the goddamn mic cable away! There's nothing we can do about but I can't write off the stuffed peppers we shoved in our faces if I don't put the episode out! We gathered round the fire table for another of our patented socially distanced balcony nights with old friend and horror aficionado Mark Gallagher to watch the Wes Craven masterpiece, A Nightmare on Elm Street from 1984! We meet Fred Krueger, lowly child killer, who hasn't had time to stop off at the demonic open mics in Hell to hone his quips and instead is just menacing...2020-10-231h 16
Two Boys in a BalconyCreepshow (1982)*extreme creep voice* Stand clear of the meteor shit! It's week 17 of Boo Englund and we're dipping our damn toes back into the waters of Castle Rock (probably) for the ultimate Halloween dream team matchup! Script by Stephen King, direction by George Romera, best acting by Stephen King! It's Creepshow! 5 tales so scary (?) that you'll probably die... of laughing maybe! Or Covid-19! There's lots of things that will really kill you out there. Try to avoid them... if you can... muwhahahahaha!2020-10-211h 25
Two Boys in a BalconyFriday the 13th (1980) - Live at Home with ROB GREENE! (warning: wonky sound on this one!)Summer camp! It's a girl's time to be alive! Unless you go to Camp Crystal Lake LOLOL! Once again we opened up the balcony and brought in hilarious comedian and LOYAL LISTENER Rob Greene to watch the original Friday the 13th on ole big screen! And yes, Bill's mic cable is somehow supremely shitty throughout and I don't know how to fix it. Hopefully you'll forgive us and not send your mother to murder us in a very haphazard yet methodical nature!2020-10-161h 28
Two Boys in a BalconyCarrie (1976)YOU'RE ALL GONNA LAUGH AT THIS! It's week three of Boo Englund and we're doing a bonafide masterpiece,, Brian Depalma's 1976 teen sex comedy Carrie! It's Carrie! You know exactly what is going to happen the entire time. THere's no surprises and it is absolutely thrilling. It's Carrie!2020-10-141h 30
Two Boys in a BalconyHalloween (1978) - Live at Home with DOUG GUERTIN and DAN BOULGER!LOOK OUT! It's another B-b-b-bonus Boo Englund episode for you criminals. We set up the projector and the screen on the veranda and sat down with two good buddies for an EXTREMELY SOCIALLY DISTANCED screening on the John Carpenter masterpiece Halloween from 1978. Jaime Lee Curtis you crazy for this one. Doug Guertin from the Top Five Podcast and Dan Boulger from our episode on Hamilton came together for a real sloppy chat about almost anything and everything! Marvel at Doug's Halloween origin story! Behold Dan's inability to stay focused and remember that we were recording! Dazzle at Mrs Boulger's meatballs...2020-10-091h 11
Two Boys in a BalconyPieces (1982)The most beautiful thing in the world is listening to the Balcony boys fall in love with the insanity that is 1982's Spanish exploitation picture Pieces! Set in Boston, filmed in Spain, at no point does it appear that anyone in any scene is speaking the same language. This movie has it all... chainsaws, co-eds, and kung-fu. None of it makes any sense and yet, even now I feel compelled to try and piece together the puzzle that is this movie. Pieces! It gets the highest honor the Balcony has ever bestowed: a very strong recommendation!2020-10-071h 22
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974) - Live at Home with MIKE WHITMAN!Ladies and gentlemen, as a special Boo Englund bonus for your ghouls and ghosts, the Balcony boys are running a series of special extra episodes recorded before and after some socially distanced outdoor screenings of classic slasher flicks! The New England rule gets tossed right out the window as we journey to rural Texas for one of the greatest horror movies ever made, Tobe Hooper's Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Along for the ride is longtime good buddy and hilarious comedian Mike Whitman! So sit back, relax, and scream loud enough that the police definitely should have been called during our watch...2020-10-021h 26
Two Boys in a BalconySession 9 (2001) with the return of KEN REID!Boo Englund comes in a day early this year! We were going to talk about some boring historic drama but called an audible for the asbestos-based horror of 2001's Session 9. Relive your days of co-playing Mtv's Fear by listening to special guest Ken Reid recount us with his teenage tales of breaking into the abandoned mental hospital where this films takes places and then giving us a very scholarly assessment of the film! It's the Shining in Everett so put on your mask and don't breathe the air!2020-09-301h 31
Two Boys in a BalconyHamilton (2020) - Live at Home with DAN BOULGER!Hey there, sports fans! It's a Friday B-b-b-b-b-bonus episode! Once again Sean and Bill set up the projector for a little outside screening on the Disney+ presentation of the live musical adaptation of Ronald Chernow's biography of a man with the last name of HAMILTON! Does it take place in New England? NOT FOR A SECOND! But they mention John Adams a couple times so that counts. Going us on the veranda is our good buddy Dan Boulger who you might have seen on TV once or twice. It could be completely unlistenable but you get what you pay for...2020-09-251h 01
Two Boys in a BalconyAn American Carol (2008) with MARK GALLAGHER!Ooops we did it again... step aside Boondocks Saints II: All Saint's Day, there's a new king of Mount shitty movies. That's right. We poked the dying corpse of the Zucker brothers legacy and watched the right-wing, conservative "comedy" An American Carol starring Chris Farley's less charismatic brother Kevin and a virtual who's who of Hollywood's true heroes: annoying republican twittter celebrities. James Woods, Jon Voight, Kevin Sorbo, and Kelsey Grammar all in the same picture?! STATES RIGHTS! This movie sucked shit but we had a fun conversation with the hilarious Mark Gallagher of the Mark Gallagher Thing so please...2020-09-231h 31
Two Boys in a BalconyNational Treasure (2004)Hey gang. Sean here. I didn't forget to post this episode. I had a highly complicated, highly fraught, and highly illegal scavenger hunt prepared that would have seen you travel from Plymouth Rock to the Bunker Hill Memorial to the Dr Suess Museum in Springfield ultimately arriving at a textile museum in Lowell but Bill said I should just post the episode. We watched National Treasure. Here. Somehow this is better I guess.2020-09-161h 29
Two Boys in a BalconyJohnny Tremain (1957)Today in the balcony, the boys pull off the greatest heist of all time. That's right. We broke into the Disney vault and smuggled the 1957 revolutionary war romp Johnny Tremain back into the light. Dip your hand in silver, chop it off, and melt it down into musket food cause we are the boys, yes, we are the boys, the boys in the balcony.2020-09-091h 18
Two Boys in a Balcony1776 (1972) with JOSH GONDELMAN!Four score and seven years ago, our forefathers gathered in a hot ass room in Philadelphia to sing and dance our way to independence! That's right, folks, it's about to get all 1776 up in here and to do it, we're joined by Josh Gondelman from Desus & Mero, Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, books, pep talks, and the good ole pod Make My Day with Josh Gondelman! It's our biggest guest ever so you know we're firing on all cylindars and the audio on Bill's mic is a little off but don't let that stop you from enjoying some wholesome...2020-09-021h 57
Two Boys in a BalconySummer Catch (2001)Join us to today in the wayback machine as we travel to the single worst event of the year two thousand and one. Today in the balcony, it's Summer Catch a movie so bad that I won't waste one more second thinking about it.2020-08-261h 20
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Way, Way Back (2013)When the sun is blazing and the summer gets hot, Water WIZZZZZZZZZ is a very cool spot. That's right, folks. For the second time in three weeks, we relocate the balcony to the top of a three story water park in Wareham, MA for the most geographically unrealistic New England film of all time, the Way, Way Back! You're telling me this kid rides a bike from Marshfield to Wareham everyday and no one notices? COME ON! It's a nostalgic ride back to probably 2012, maybe 1985, maybe 1994! We're travelling through time like a damn Dr Who. Have fun! Wash your hands!2020-08-191h 22
Two Boys in a BalconyMoonrise Kingdom (2012)Ladies and gentlemen, Bill is in love... with cinema! Today in the Balcony, we're talking about a movie that has the old man smitten and Sean forgot to watch! What? Yeah. Sean really fucked it up this week and thought that he would be able to remember what happens in this movie he watched a month ago but folks, he doesn't! Lots of Boy Scout memories and lots of a gosh darn honest to goodness fawning over this weird sweet movie.2020-08-121h 19
Two Boys in a BalconyGrown Ups (2010)It's the damn dog days of summer baby and it's time to get together with your ole pals Bill, Sean, Lenny, Kurt, Marcus, Rob, and Eric and stop acting like kids and start acting like some damn Grown Ups. This cursed artifact of a simpler time should not be consumed by any viewing audience but after repeatedly threatening to watch the sequel throughout the episode, Sean is here to tell you that Grown Ups 2 is significantly more enjoyable. Quarantine really has rotted his brain. We'll announce a gofundme for the redemption of his sanity very soon. Grown Ups stars the 1993...2020-08-051h 34
Two Boys in a BalconyOne Crazy Summer (1986) with Ken ReidToday in the balcony, we finally smashed open the box that said "in case of emergency, break glass" and pulled out the red phone that calls directly into the TV Guidance Counselor Cave and it's a good thing we did because Bill and Sean were ill-equipped to discuss the legacy of One Crazy Summer director Savage Steve Holland alone. Instead we call upon our good friend, Ken Reid, who has now cemented himself as the VERY. FIRST. GUEST. It's a fun one as the Balcony boys pick the brain of the TVGC about this 34 year comedic masterpiece. Of all the...2020-07-291h 23
Two Boys in a BalconyJaws: The Revenge (1987)This time it's personal... because the Balcony boys got together for a socially distanced movie night with them and 7,000 mosquitoes! This is not a typical episode because Sean forgot the power cord for the recording equipment so they had to improvise but it's audible. You can hear it. It's not a commentary track but the boys periodically stopped the movie to reflect on what they saw/buffer the movie cause the outside aint' got the best wifi. It's Jaws: the Revenge, an insane movie! If you think our typical film commentary and analysis is lacking, you ain't seen nothing yet...2020-07-2243 min
Two Boys in a BalconyJaws 3-D (1983)What's scary than a shark in two dimensions? A SHARK IN THREE DIMENSIONS! Today in the Balcony, we're jumping off the screen (of your phones) and into your hearts (of your ears)! QUAID!2020-07-151h 36
Two Boys in a BalconyJaws 2 (1978)Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the balcony2020-07-081h 30
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Boondock Saints II: All Saint's Day (2009)We gather here today to lay to rest the Boondock Saints and cinematic auteur Troy Duffy. Say your piece and get the fuck out.2020-06-241h 36
Two Boys in a BalconyOvernight (2013)Good morning, nerds! We're kicking off year 2 with a documentary about a man that could very easily have been either one of the boys had their fathers dropped them off the balcony as a baby. Overnight documents the rise and rise and rise of one Mr Troy Duffy, acclaimed director of the Boondock Saints, a movie we just adore. What are your thoughts on Keanu Reeves? What are your thoughts on Ethan Hawke? Kenneth Branagh? You better get your house in order cause Troy Duffy knows exactly how he feels. Overnight stars Mark Wahlberg, John Goodman, Billy Zane, Vincent D'nofrio...2020-06-171h 18
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Boondock Saints (1999)Happy anniversary probably maybe? We did it. The Balcony has been open for a year and we're celebrating by watching a movie that Sean calls "reprehensible." It's the Boondock Saints! If it's your favorite movie, don't tell us! We risked imploding the world and put the very fabric of existence into risk by putting the Boondock Saints up on the Boondock Saints scale. Does it pass muster? Who knows? But get comfy with the Boondockers because next week, audible, we're watching Overnight, the 2003 documentary about the rise and fall of Boondocks director, Troy Duffy and the week after, we put...2020-06-101h 21
Two Boys in a BalconyFree Fire (2016)Hey folks. It's a real weird week to try and be silly but we're so close to our one year anniversary that we decided to stay course and watch a movie called Free Fire that honestly we didn't like. Does the spoiler alert go before or after? Who knows? We were in weird moods when we recorded it but I think we were able to keep it funny enough. Hopefully it gives you a couple chuckles along for when you're taking a break from the endless shit fire.
Also it is a weird time and we're not any kind of p...2020-06-031h 01
Two Boys in a BalconyNext Stop Wonderland (1998)Next stop... FUNderland! That's right! We're moving the balcony to FUNderland because we watched Next Stop Wonderland and then set up microphones to complain about it for over an hour! What's more fun than that? Don't answer that unless you want to step into the FUNderdome with the Balcony Boys. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if you crossed paths with your soul mate 56 time over the course of 90 minutes only to finally meet them at minute 93 when the movie ends? No? What happened to your imagination? Next Stop Wonderland stars Philip Seymour Hoffman and others.2020-05-201h 19
Two Boys in a BalconyColor Out of Space (2019)Gather up your elder signs and pray for a swift death cause the Balcony Boys are back to their witchy roots and we're paying homage to the Elder God Cthulhu and YogSobbaDoo with 2019's Nicolas Cage mindwrap Color Out of Space. Richard Stanley is back, baby! It's almost like he never left! At the very least, one of the balcony boys knew who he was. This is a weird ass movie and it was a weird ass record as Bill McMorrow succumbed to cosmic space madness on more than one occasion and somehow drops the Facetime call a minimum of 17...2020-05-131h 34
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Thomas Crown Affair (1968)bip bap you jazz cats... we're going back to the swinging 60s for a sleek, slick, mod New England HEIST film! Who would have thought a movie in New England would be about bank robbers? It's the original Thomas Crown Affair and it's seeeeeeexxxxxxxyyyyyyy. We need some wholesome recommendations coming up because the boys are getting randy (Do I make you horny baby - Austin Powers). This thing has all your New England favorite traditions: lobster bakes, downtown Boston, horse polo. It's a very fun episode and you don't even have to break into our hearts to get it. What...2020-05-061h 19
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Master (2012)Good morrow to you and thine and thus begins another most stimulating dissection and dissertation of the more intellectually prosperous corners of the cinematic arts as Mssrs William Barholomew McMorrow and Sean Esquire Sullivan present thoughts both enlightened and inspiring on the Master, a film from the year of our Lord Jesus Christ Two Thousand and Twelve. It's a high-minded discourse and also very smart and full of mirth. The Master stars the Joker, the other guy from Twister, and movie Susan Lucchi.2020-04-291h 17
Two Boys in a BalconyDoctor Sleep (2019)Hey there, baseball fans! This week in the Balcony we're taking a look at one of the great American baseball films, the underrated 2019 Doctor Sleep, directed by Mike Flanagan, based on the baseball book, Doctor Sleep written by baseball connoisseur Stephen King! It's Field of Dreams for the corona-age! It's also the sequel to the Shining. BUT AMERICA'S PASTIME! Pitchers and catchers report! Open it back up! Doctor Sleep stars Roger Clemens, Mike Scioscia, Don Mattingly, Steve Sax, Ozzie Smith, Wade Boggs, Darryl "Daaaaaaaaaaaryl" Strawberry, Ken Griffey Jr, and No Way Jose Canseco2020-04-221h 57
Two Boys in a BalconyOutbreak (1995)Hide your children, hide your wives... the Balcony Boys are on a monkey hunt. Recorded live from two separate balconies via a series of social distant cans and strings, we're back with our first true quarantine episode. Are there glitches and botches a plenty? You bet your nuts but that doesn't matter because we're talking about the 1995 Wolfgan Petersen infectious disease romcom Outbreak! Why? Because we didn't think the first episode recorded remotely would be awkward enough, why not throw in the quaint tale of an epidemic that's totally isolated and controllable! Fun! Outbreak stars Tootsie, Rene Russo, my crush...2020-04-081h 07
Two Boys in a BalconySpenser Confidential (2020)Oh folks, we're broadcasting live from the bunker balcony with a very special, "in case of emergency, break glass," episode of the podcast. Originally we intended this to be a bonus episode to celebrate the end of Marchy March but now that we're legally prohibited to be in the same balcony due to Covid-19, this is the best we got. At the beginning of Marchy March, Netflix released the latest collaboration between King Mark Wahlberg and Director Peter Berg. It's a movie for sure. It hits all the most basic parameters to be called a motion picture. Are there better...2020-04-011h 01
Two Boys in a BalconyFear (1996)STAY IN THE FUCKING HOUSE!
Well, well, well, Marchy March has certainly taken a turn. Despite repeated pleas from the Balcony for Mark Wahlberg to beat the shit out of Covid-19, the response has been tepid. Scientists have argued that a punch, no matter the star power attached, can "beat" the "shit" out of a pandemic-level virus. OK SCIENCE. Instead, a few days before the world fell apart, the boys gathered once more in the Balcony to record an episode about the 1996 movie Fear. Is the timing of this episode's movie's title bad? YES. YES IT IS. But it's fun...2020-03-251h 22
Two Boys in a BalconyRock Star (2001)WARNING: Before consuming this episode of Two Boys in a Balcony, please consult your doctor to see if Rock and Roll can work for you.
It's week three of Marchy March and sweet shit, Bill's happier than a pig in a pile of Rock Star dvds (if you don't like it, you write the copy, McMorrow!) It's the fictionalized, unauthorized dramatization of the Tim "Ripper" Owens story! You know... the story of the guy who replaced Rob Halford in Judas Priest because... I... don't... know. Bill, we forgot to talk about Tim "Ripper" Owens! Goddammit. Anyway, this is a movie a...2020-03-181h 11
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Lovely Bones (2009)On a very special Two Boys in a Balcony, the boys are taking about their favorite subject of all... movies with Mark Wahlberg in them! How do you follow up arguably the three most ambitious literary adaptations of all time? With a flawed remake of a giant gorilla movie. How do you follow up your flawed remake of a giant gorilla movie? WITH ANOTHER LITERARY ADAPTATION! Today, the boys are diving into the 2009 Peter Jackson film The Lovely Bones based on the best selling novel and almost starring Ryan Gosling. That's right. Little did we know when we set the...2020-03-111h 19
Two Boys in a BalconyBonus - Marchy March Madness 2020The boys walk you through the 2020 Marchy March Bracket which can be found exclusively at facebook.com/balconyboysshow probably!2020-03-0937 min
Two Boys in a BalconyBoogie Nights (1997)YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO IT'S ABOUT THAT TIME TO BRING FORTH THE RHYTHM AND RHYME!
That's right! It's the first week of Marchy March, the Funky Month and we're peaking early this year with what might possibly be the best film we've ever covered, Paul Thomas Andderson's masterpiece, Boogie Nights. Would you watch [REDACTED] where [REDACTED] [REDACTED] up the [REDACTED] all while {REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] in [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED]? Yeah you would. Boogie Nights stars the Patron Saint of the Podcast Mark Wahlberg and honestly that's enough.2020-03-041h 22
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Lighthouse (2019)Avast ye landlubbers and ahoy and wicky! It be the Balcony wit Two Lads and the seas be raging. A squall blew in from the south and dar she blows! All right. Enough. It's your weekly trip to the cinema with America's Dumbest Film Critics and we're here today to do our goddamnedest to crack open Robert Egger's 2019 puzzle the Lighthouse. We've each seen this movie twice now and for the life of us, we have no idea what is going on and/or why but we like it? Have you given as much thought to mermaid genitalia as Robert...2020-02-191h 07
Two Boys in a BalconyThe War of the Roses (1989)Happy Valentine's Day everybody! Today the Balcony is full of love! Bill's got his Cupid wings on. Sean's got his Cupid diaper on. We love love and it makes us want to kill each other more than ever. Today in the balcony, the most romantic film of all time, Danny Devito's pitch black comedy The War of the Roses. Boy howdy, to quote Sean's mom, "that movie is sick. It's a sick movie." What happens what people stop loving each other and start getting real? Sorry my kid has the flu. This intro sucks but this episode is chock full...2020-02-121h 14
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Shining (1980)HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE'S PODCAST!
You know all those times we said that Two Boys in a Balcony is about films set in New England, feature New England, about New England, or say the words New England? Well we're stretching that to the absolute limit today as we talk about the Shining, the most New England film ever made that's set entirely in Colorado. But fret not, Shelley Duvall does at one point say, "Vermont" and that counts! It's the Stephen King masterpiece that he absolutely hates... check into room 237 and listen to America's Dumbest Film Critics talk about Stanley Kubrik's the Shining...2020-02-051h 30
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Flight of Dragons (1982)Guys... we screwed up and watched a weird 1982 DIRECT TO VIDEO animated movie from Rankin/Bass called the Flight of Dragons that sucks and the best thing we can say about it is that we snapped half way through the episode and just stopped recording. So it's a short one this week but we're back next talking about an absolute New England masterpiece. We love you. Rate, review, subscribe or don't.2020-01-2939 min
Two Boys in a BalconyBlow (2001)She don't like she don't like she don't like... the podcast! Welcome back one and all to the podcast that never ends cause it's riding high on ten tons of rowdy powder! We're not making beignets in the balcony and that ain't powdered sugar, my friend. We watched the 2001 pre-9/11 coke fueled biopic Blow starring America's favorite scumbag, John Depp! It's a wild one, ladies and gentlemen! So wild that Sean forgot to listen back to take all the times he got up to go to the bathroom. Maybe there's none! Maybe there's 10! Only you can find out. Blow starts...2020-01-221h 08
Two Boys in a BalconyA Civil Action (1998)Siri, turn on extreme Dave Matthews voice
DON'T DRINK THE WATER DON'T DRINK THE WATER DON'T DRINK THE WATER
Today in the Balcony, the boys dare ask, "what's so civil about action anyway?" It's the 1998 snoozer A Civil Action and it's so boring to write about that I daresay I just won't do it. FUN EPISODE THOUGH! Lots of jokes!
A Civil Action stars Danny Zuko and Tony Soprano.2020-01-1558 min
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Brinks Job (1978)Oh folks! It's Wednesday which means it's time for the Balcony Boys to be your cinematic guide to the films of New England and if you can believe it, we've got a movie that's harder to find than I am the Cheese! They must be keeping this thing in a friggin BRINKS VAULT cause it's impossible to find a copy of William Friedkin's the BRINKS JOB! Fire up your Dutch television transfers illegally uploaded to youtube and watch the film the way the director intended... on your phone with subtitles and a European television station identifier hiding in the corner...2020-01-081h 11
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Social Network (2010)Happy New Year! We hear in Balconyville have been busy returning all the Christmas presents you got us for that sweet, sweet cash and/or store credit because your gifts aren't cool. You know what's cool? $13 to the Paper Store. Guys, it's the Social Network, a film so good Sean Sullivan called it the best movie of the 2010s and a movie so good Bill thought it was directed by David Lynch. He's so stupid. If he wants me to stop saying it, maybe he should write the intros for the episodes. In honor of Aaron Sorkin, the boys did...2019-12-311h 28
Two Boys in a BalconyWhite Christmas (1954)You're dreaming of an episode of Two Boys in a Balcony about White Christmas! Just like the ones you heard before! Where America's Dumbest Film Critics and a cast of dead mid century entertainers, break down the Christmas classic, White Christmas! Warning: there is no blackface in this movie. That's a different movie. It's White Christmas! Sorry I'm in the middle of unwrapping a new episode of your favorite podcast for you! White Christmas stars ghosts!2019-12-251h 24
Two Boys in a BalconyLittle Women (1994)Today, dear friends, we complete our Winona Ryder hat trick with 1994's Little Women. Can Sean keep focused? Could Bill take Ken Burns in a fight? Do we restart this episode 17 times? No, no, and no! It was 18 times. I'm gonna be honest guys I'm not really feeling this ep description so I'm just going to say this: listen, rate, review, subscribe, burn your sister's manuscript, rail against marriage, and then get engaged in the final seconds of the movie. Little Women stars Winona Ryder, Susan Sarandon, Hermione Granger, Lady Bird, Claire Danes, Kirsten Dunst, the girl from Midsommar, Christian...2019-12-111h 14
Two Boys in a BalconyMystic River (2003)We finally did it, folks! We finally watched a movie that people wanted us to talk about! It's the 2003 Boston Shakespearean tragedy, Mystic River from the mumbliest director in the old west, Ol' Blue Eyes himself, Mayor of the city that never sleeps, Clinton Eastwood. Is this movie funny? NOT AT ALL. Is this episode funny? What'd you crack your head, kid? Course it's funny. You're with the Balcony boys. Did Bill watch Mystic Pizza instead of Mystic River? Only time will tell. So come along as we dip our toes into a body of water you should never dip...2019-12-041h 40
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Balcony Boys Completely Denominational Christmas Bonus SpectacularAttention Black Friday shoppers, there's a sale on.... your hearts! The Balcony Boys grabbed a cup of hot cocoa, dumped out the cocoa, filled it up with love, drank it, and then sat down to discuss their top 5 Christmas movies of all time! It's a Christmas miracle wherein they only overlapped twice probably but maybe three or four times! Who cares! It's the holiday season and loop de loop and dickory dock, don't forget to hang up your sock and also download this quick little shot of seasonal pick-me-up what does that sentence even say. God Bless America and God...2019-11-2930 min
Two Boys in a BalconyPete's Dragon (1977)It's a brazzle dazzle day today in the Balcony so let us be your candle on the water and steer you toward a third song title from today's masterpiece Pete's Dragon from 1977. With the launch of Disney+, the Balcony Boys take a deep dive into Passamaquody Harbor and break down the legality of orphan purchasing and dragon keeping. Who do you call when an invisible dragon fucks up your fence? Do you know? Cause I spent a lot of money putting that fence in and late one night when I was coming home from a hard night of drinking with...2019-11-201h 35
Two Boys in a BalconyDead Poets Society (1989)Oh Captain, my captain... get off your damn desk and get your ass up into the Balcony as the boys discover and rediscover the 30th anniversary of the stuffy boarding school drama Dead Poets Society. Guys, is poetry fun? Was that question grammatically correct? Who knows? Who cares? Carpe Diem or whatever. Put on your Hogwarts robes and sneak off to the Indian cave cause friends, we gots some living to do. What's your favorite poem? Is it the one about the escaped prisoner with the hook hand who sneaks up to Lover's Lane? My favorite poem is this podcast...2019-11-061h 36
Two Boys in a BalconyHocus Pocus (1993)Gather all ye virgins and let me sing you a tale of three witch sisters and the virgin that resurrected them accidentally by using his virgin fingers to light a candle in what can only be described as the virgin goof of the century. That's right, all you blossoming young boys and girls, we watched the 1993 Disney cult classic Hocus Pocus and you know what? It's a movie! We tried our best to keep this episode clean and free from the scourge of profanity but Sean insulted Motley Crue and Bill lost his cool. It happens. But what I can...2019-10-301h 20
Two Boys in a BalconyBONUS - Two Boys in a Balcony Halloween SpooktacularSmack dab in the middle of Boo England, it's the Two Boys in a Balcony Halloween Spooktacular! With special guest appearances from Sean Sullivan! Bill McMorrow! The boys are counting down their FIVE FAVORITE SCARY MOVIES and talking about a whole lot more. It's a bonus episode because we* love you**
*Sean
**the sound of his own voice2019-10-1832 min
Two Boys in a BalconyBeetlejuice (1988)Say it threw times for the third week of Boo England... balconyboys balconyboys balconyboys! Whoa watch out the hosts with the ghosts are here to talk about Sean's self-professed favorite movie of all the time, the 1988 Tim Burton masterpiece, Beetlejuice. He'll say silly things like this was the career peak for everyone involved and balconyboysshow@gmail.com if you think you can prove him wrong. Spoiler alert: you can't. Bill had never seen this movie and boy oh boy did he jump in the line and rock his body in time, ok? I believe you. We're talking the magic career o...2019-10-161h 15
Two Boys in a BalconyPet Sematary (1989)****Today's episode is brought to you proudly by Fences! Since the beginning of time, Fences! have been used to keep people from going places they shouldn't go. Fences! When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me, singing words of wisdom, "Get a fence!" Go to your local fencing supply store and use offer code Balcony for one confused look. Fences!****
Today in the balcony, we celebrate week two of Booooooooo England, our celebration of the spookier side of New England films, by watching the 1989 Pet Sematary directed by a person and written by a weirdo...2019-10-091h 29
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Conjuring (2013)Clap, clap! Turn on the lights and get out of the basement! It's the Conjuring on the first week of Booooooooo Englund, the Two Boys in a Balcony October celebration of the New England films for the more spooky hearted. A rare case of a New England film crossing state lines, join famed CT paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren for an exploration of the true(?) story of the Perron family haunting of Harrisville, RI. Look, I'll be honest with you... this movie creeped me out (Hi. It's me, Sean. I write these. Bill can't write.) Listen to two grown...2019-10-021h 38
Two Boys in a BalconyI Am The Cheese (1983)Dearly beloved, we are gathered hear today to mourn the death of the career of Penis Breath, the young man who played the older brother in E.T. who was doomed to play the lead of today's balcony feature, the 1983 I Am The Cheese, a movie so unenjoyable it's only available on youtube or at your sadder public libraries. But fret not, friendly listener, because the Balcony Boys do all the heavy lifting as they implore you with a heart full of love to never watch this movie on your own. Listen, though, because many a wonderful goof is had...2019-09-2543 min
Two Boys in a BalconyIT Chapter Two (2019)Welp nothing floats forever. This week in the balcony, the boys bid a fond farewell to Derry, ME with their most recent movie yet, 2019's IT Chapter Two. The boys gathered the balconeers and headed to the cinema on opening night and will recount you with their tale of surviving a two hour and fifty minute sequel. How much popcorn is too much? Where should you deposit the excess? Would you believe that the key to defeating an ancient cosmic evil is to study with the Roastmaster General Jeff Ross? IT Chapter Two stars Professor X, Miss Sloane, Stefon, Ziggy...2019-09-182h 18
Two Boys in a BalconyIT (2017)Everything floats in the balcony... because we put root beer and ice cream on it! Hey! It's the longest goddamn episode of this very fun and popular podcast and CONGRATULATIONS TO THE BALCONY BOYS! It only took 13 episodes till we finally made one that was longer than the movie we watched! It's a spooky one today because we're talking about the 2017 re-adaptation of Stephen King's IT directed Andy Muschietti, just in time for the sequeal IT Chapter Two to hit theaters. We tackle all the big issues. What's different from the book? What's different from the 1990 mini-series? Can you handcuff...2019-09-112h 32
Two Boys in a BalconyTo Die ForRipped from the tabloids, it's Two Boys in a Balcony and we're talking the steamy, black comedy To Die For directed by Gus van Sant. Have you ever wondered what teachers the balcony boys are still pining for? Have you ever wanted to somehow know less about Pamela Smart than you did before? Well you're in luck cause class is in session and Professors Sullivan and McMorrow are here to teach you the Golden Rule: rate, review, and subscribe. To Die For stars Nicole Kidman, Matt Dillon, Joasfkasdghna;lskerqn Phoenix, a probably pre-scumbag Casey Affleck, another person, and David Cronenberg.2019-09-041h 30
Two Boys in a BalconyWhat About BobToday on a somber episode of Two Boys in a Balcony, the boys are taking a look at the harrowing expose on mental illness from the early 90s, What about Bob? A very serious study of the decline of the modern man, this... just kidding this thing is silly as shit and we're here for it! Can a movie starring two of Hollywood's most reliable leading men who absolutely hate each other on sight succeed? We think so. It's a fun one and most importantly, it's a good one. What About Bob stars Bill Murray, Richard Dreyfuss, Julie Hagerty, the...2019-08-281h 01
Two Boys in a BalconyThe Parent TrapLet's get together yeah yeah yeah and talk about this movie in the Balcony! Hey! It's the Balcony Boys here with what we hoped would be our most wholesome episode yet but almost certainly is not. It's the 1961 classic Disney picture The Parent Trap! What's the legality of separating identical twins in a divorce custody battle? Is this a fun children's romp or an indictment of the American judicial system and the breakdown of traditional family norms? Who gives a fig? It's the Parent Trap. The Parent Trap starts Hayley Mills and Hayley Mills and Hayley Mills and Hayley Mills...2019-08-211h 17
Two Boys in a BalconyHot Summer NightsIt's the dang dog days of summer and instead of using the balcony to shield us from the heat, America's dumbest film critics Bill McMorrow and Sean Sullivan are up in the balcony, baking in the heat of the 2018 AT&T/DirectTV joint production Hot Summer Nights, a movie that deserves a bigger audience than surely it has ever had. Buckle up, there's a lot going on in this one. Would you ride your motorcycle in the rain? What would you do if they put jimmie's on your ice cream? Does anyone outside the MetroBoston area know what a jimmy...2019-08-071h 42
Two Boys in a BalconyThe StrangerGrab a bucket of scrap paper and head to the woods. Today in the Balcony, we're talking the 1946 forgotten classic the Stranger, directed and starring Orson flipping Welles. Hey who reupholstered all the chairs up here? It's looking classy as shit in the balcony. Have you ever suspected that your teacher at your prestigious prep academy might be a Nazi? Well have we got a film for you. The Stranger stars Orson Welles, Edward G Robinson, Loretta Young, an annoying pharmacist, a dog of indeterminate color, and an obsession with clocks that borders on mania. Join America's Dumbest Film Critics...2019-07-241h 36