Shows
Free Sex054 - Affordable homes - Alva GotbyHow would housing justice help our sex lives?My guest in this episode is Alva Gotby, a writer and housing organiser. She is also the author of the new book Feeling at Home, which is all about housing politics. Alva’s idea is we can’t talk about free sex without talking about housing — the spaces where we live have a huge impact on the kind of sex we’re able to have.I talked with Alva about the horrifying housing crisis we’re living through, the progress (and backsliding) of women’s rights with r...
2025-06-0940 minFree Sex053 - Prioritise pleasure - Prishita Maheshwari-AplinHow can we prioritise pleasure?My guest in this episode is Prishita Maheshwari-Aplin, a writer and queer community organiser. Having just written a book about the politics of pleasure, called Roses for Hedone, Prishita has a lot of deep thoughts about how we could structure our societies so we can pursue pleasure. You can see why I wanted to speak to them!It might be self-evident that a world of free sex includes the pursuit of pleasure, but I found talking about this with Prishita to be immensely illuminating. Once we started, I...
2025-06-0249 minFree Sex052 - Better flirting! - Alice McKeeWhat’s stopping us from flirting?My guest in this episode is Alice McKee, a playwright and documentary maker. Alice thinks we can build a world where people can have the sex they want if only we were all better at flirting. Are we too full of nerves and anxieties that we can’t even make a goofy joke?In our conversation Alice drew on her work as the writer of a play called Perverts. It’s set in a queer sex club and has played at three theatres over the past few years...
2025-05-2645 minFree Sex051 - AI girlfriends - Georgi DimitrovCan men use AI to learn how to seduce women?My guest in this episode is Georgi Dimitrov, founder of an AI platform that helps men to generate a fake woman, and then chat to her. Georgi knows that a lot of straight men struggle with texting, chatting, dating, and sex, and building relationships...But having spoken to Georgi I’m not sure he’s got the right answer. As you’ll hear in the interview, Georgi says Fantasy.ai can be a place where men can practice seduction, without stakes, fear or shame...
2025-05-1945 minFree Sex050 - BONUS: Sex spaces for allTo mark the milestone of hitting 50 episodes of Free Sex, I want to add my own idea for how we can build a world where people are free to have the sex they want.My proposal is delightfully simple and appropriately bonkers: let’s put a sex space on every high street in Britain. Yes, I’m serious. No, your granny probably won’t approve. Your neighbour will ask you to sign the petition against it. The prime minister will laugh you out of town. But I am really serious about this idea. Join me while I buil...
2025-05-1212 minFree Sex049 - Shame is good! - Dug GainesHow can we educate people so they can enjoy their shameful desires?My guest in this episode is Dug Gaines, who is a living legend. For 50 years Dug has been running the Foot Fraternity, a network for people who love feet. More specifically, Dug himself is into asthenolagnia, which is arousal from perceived weakness, vulnerability, and humiliation — often wrapped up in shame.Having spent half a century helping others to explore their fetishes that are rooted in asthenolagnia, Dug has plenty to share. We talked about how society has opened up sexually since hi...
2025-05-0537 minFree Sex048 - A day without Instagram - Ruby RareWhat if we all quit watching influencers and met to discuss sex instead?My guest in this episode is Ruby Rare, who has a bone to pick with the internet. She’s built a huge online audience for her work as a sex educator, author, broadcaster, and public speaker. Ruby’s voice on sex and relationships is essential for our times, and it’s great that people can hear and see her ideas about sex online. But recently she’s been wondering: what if we turned away from our phones?Ruby and I had a me...
2025-04-2844 minFree Sex047 - Group sex - Leanne YauIs group sex the way to a better world?My guest in this episode is Leanne Yau, who runs the @polyphiliablog viral accounts across social media. Leanne is a polyamory educator who, among many other things, wants people to know more about group sex. Leanne told me how group sex and polyamory are different; and then we went on to discuss the social politics of it all. From the question of whether more people are getting into group sex to the need to de-stigmatise polyamory, Leanne has a lot to say! She also w...
2025-04-2143 minFree Sex046 - Cost cutting - Matt SkullyAre sex events and fetish gear too expensive?My guest in this episode is Matt Skully, who’s a performer, curator, events producer and occasional sex worker. His heart is as big as his desires as dark—and he’s got a long list of ideas that could make sex more financially accessible to people. Fetish gear costs money, event tickets aren’t getting cheaper, and sometimes you have to travel big, expensive distances to get to the place where you can enjoy the sex you want. We don’t talk enough about how wealth i...
2025-04-1451 minFree Sex045 - Be serious! - Anastasiia FedorovaCan we find a way to take sex seriously?My guest in this episode is Anastasiia Fedorova, a latex lover and author of a book called Second Skin: Inside the Worlds of Fetish, Kink and Deviant Desire. Anastasiia takes her subject so seriously that she’s built it into her life—and written a whole book about it. I was fascinated to hear more about the research she’s done for the book, from fetishes for cars, monsters and medical gloves, as well as the classics such as feet, latex and leather. As a queer...
2025-04-0749 minFree Sex044 - It’s complicated! - Sari van AndersWhat if sexuality wasn’t a spectrum?My guest in this episode is Sari Van Anders, who is a very multi-faceted scientist and thinker. Drawing on her experience in behavioural science and neuroscience, plus gender and queer thinking, Sari and her team have built an incredibly refreshing concept for how we can think of ourselves as sexual beings.We tend to think of our gender and sex as one thing, and that we are attracted to others based on their gender and sex (eg, I’m a man who fancies men so I’m gay...
2025-03-3149 minFree Sex043 - Licensed sex - Karl VerbotenHow should we regulate sex clubs?My guest in this episode is Karl Verboten, one of the masterminds behind one of London’s greatest kink club nights, Klub Verboten.Karl told me the story of how Klub Verboten had to fight an archaic licensing system in order to hold parties that are sex-positive and safe at the same time. It’s a really fascinating story to do with local politics, legal regulations, the relationship between club promoters and the police — and it even involves kinky people sending sexy photos of themselves to the local...
2025-03-2446 minFree Sex042 - Tone shift - Zachary ZaneAre sex-positive people too self-righteous?My guest in this episode is Zachary Zane, a writer whose work focuses on sex and, well, his own experiences as a bisexual slut. Zach literally wrote the book on being a Boyslut.Zach came on Free Sex to talk about how writers like him (and me), and anyone else talking about sex politics, can improve how we talk about sex. If we are hoping to build a world of free sex, we need to share information about sex in a way that doesn’t alienate people or ‘call...
2025-03-1743 minFree SexBONUS: The rent is killing my sex lifeWhat a dominatrix taught me about universal basic incomeThis is an audio version of an essay from the Free Sex Substack - subscribe now to receive my writing into your inbox, and to support my work.Would you join me in a thought experiment? We all have basic needs, such as food and shelter. And most of us have to cover these ourselves. Even though governments promise to provide our basic needs, people are starving and sleeping rough. We fudge through life trying to make sure we have somewhere nice to rest...
2025-03-1012 minFree Sex040 - Free money is sexy - Eva OhWhat if we didn’t need to work to earn money?My guest in this episode is Eva Oh, a dominatrix who wants everyone to have their basic needs financially covered. This was such a philosophical conversation, and I loved it! Eva argues that we can build a world of free sex if we adopt a universal basic income — people would have more time to investigate their own sexuality, instead of having to work so hard just to cover their basic needs. She shared stories from her own life, including how her own fearlessness has helped her...
2025-03-1050 minFree Sex039 - No normal - Silva NevesHow can we flip the script on what sex and relationships can be?My guest in this episode is Silva Neves, who is a psychosexual and relationships psychotherapist. Silva sees all sorts of clients with different challenges to do with sex and relationships, so he’s a fascinating person to talk to about free sex. His big idea is that we need to know ourselves without the influences of society. That’s a hard task, of course! But Silva broke it down for me. We talked about the power of films and stories, the q...
2025-03-0345 minFree Sex038 - Kink as an identity - Richard SprottShould we change our sexuality labels?My guest in this episode is Richard Sprott, a psychologist and sexuality researcher. Richard’s been exploring human sexuality for 20 years but says he’s still “at the beginning” of understanding it. His principle, developing, idea is about ‘kink identity’—which could help us to get to a world of free sex.The idea is that our kink identities can be just as significant as our sexual orientations. In fact, for some people, much more so. Richard and his colleagues have used their findings from lots of studies to pro...
2025-02-2449 minFree Sex037 - Channelling sexual energy - Kalah HillDo we all share a communal sexual energy that’s just waiting to be activated?My guest in this episode is Kalah Hill, and she thinks the answer is definitely yes! Kalah works with individuals and groups of people to help them to discover and channel their sexual energies. She’s all about rooting our sexual pleasures in our bodies, our spirits, our ecosystems and our histories. So she was a fascinating guest for Free Sex.We talked about how Kalah creates play parties, the history of ‘eros’ from the Ancient Greeks, the science...
2025-02-1748 minFree Sex036 - Sexy clubs - Diana IsiHow can we create non-judgemental sex clubs and dancefloors?My guest in this episode is Diana Isi, who is part of the underground queer scene in London. As a DJ, Diana helps to create precious spaces where people come together to feel good, feel sexy, to dance, to commune, to kiss and maybe more. Diana’s vision for free sex is spaces like this, which operate without judgement or labels or categories. She told me about her own experiences on the gay male scene and how they led her into the queer underground, her...
2025-02-1046 minFree Sex035 - Foot shame - Adam ZmithWhat if... we could suck toes without shame?In this episode, my producer Tash turns the mic on ME to ask me about my foot kink. I’ve just published a new book called Solemates: A History of Our Fetish for Feet, so Tash has a million questions for me about how it can help us to get to a world where we can suck toes without stressing out about it. Tash and I discuss shame, freedom, what is actually ‘sex’, and the double standard of what ‘sex’ means. I tell Tash about my own jour...
2025-02-0344 minFree Sex034 - BONUS: My book about foot fetishes - Adam ZmithThis episode is an excerpt from my new book, Solemates: A History of Our Fetish for Feet, published by 404 Ink. You can buy the book from the usual places and direct from the publisher here.If you sign up to my newsletter I’ll send you a PDF of the text of the first chapter as a taster, too.The excerpt is read by me, and it’s the introduction chapter for the book. It introduces my fetish, and my deep interest in its history, as well as linking to popular culture. I’d love...
2025-02-0321 min
The Quilt8 | The WaveCornwall has a long history of drawing artistic types, for the space, the light, and the rhythm of the waves. In this final episode of The Quilt, Tash travels to the South West for a personal exploration of how queer creatives especially have been inspired in the region. They meet Veronica the queer pirate created by artist Scamp Niemz and queer historian Sophie Meyer, sing sea shanties with artist Rhys Morgan of Seaweed in the Fruit Locker, spend a night in the old home of the poet Charles Causley, and speak to Eirian Pascoe-Jones, one of t...
2024-12-311h 04The Quilt7 | The VoiceRhaid newid popeth medd hoywon a lesbiaid!How can you describe your desires and sense of yourself when they don’t seem to fit with the language you use?In this episode Adam travels to South Wales to meet Dafydd Frayling, a pioneering activist who disrupted arts festivals and radio broadcasts in the 80s to show how Welsh speakers needed new words so they could make queer people feel more included. He also meets young queer writers today, Leo Drayton and Nia Morais, who are making work about their identities and using Welsh in...
2024-12-2457 minThe Quilt6 | The HiddenNorthern Ireland’s intriguing queer history draws Tash to Belfast. In exploring stories that are often kept out of view, Tash hears tales of jailed men, a pioneering community helpline, and intersex experience. They speak to Michael Lawrence, a historian looking into the prison records of men who were convicted of buggery, and digs into the archive of charity Cara-Friend looking back over the letters people sent across its long and heartwarming history with Community Development Manager Adam Murray. The final patches added to our quilt in this episode are stitched by Hannah who shares her lif...
2024-12-171h 08The Quilt5 | The CommunityPeople have moved to The Midlands from all over the world — so how has this migration shaped the region’s queer community?In this episode, Adam meets Ranjit Khutan who tells the story of his parents moving to England from India, and how they raised him with a community spirit. This led him to run the first support group for South Asian men who have sex with men in Birmingham in the 1990s, and do pioneering work in sexual health. Bursting out into Birmingham’s Gay Village at the same time was the drag queen Seema Butt...
2024-12-1048 minThe Quilt4 | The PrideIf the world has made it hard for your community to keep going, how do you still find the pride?In this episode, Tash travels to the northeast of England, to the old mining town of Stanley in County Durham. They hear about the history of mining and shipbuilding, and what the wake of those industries has meant for queer people living there. There are stories from Sharon McIlvaney, who reflects on her own upbringing as a bisexual woman who now runs a local queer community youth group called Freedom Zone. Tash meets two of the...
2024-12-0346 minThe Quilt3 | The MissingScottish history is laden with the sense of loss, from the Highland clearances to... Glasgow’s lesbian bars that closed down in the 1990s!In this episode, Adam takes a tour of those voided queer spaces with one of their old disco dykes, Natalie Wilson. He also hears from archivist Mel Reeve about the missing queer and bisexual elders from our collective past, and Rob Crawford, who reflects on the decades he lost due to gay shame. Finally he heard the story of Reach Out Highland, a trans-inclusive sexual health organisation from the 1990s, from Julia Go...
2024-11-261h 05The Quilt2 | The FaithThe northwest of England is famous for progressive thinking, from women’s liberation to power for the working classes. In this episode, Tash meets some of the folks who are bringing this forward-thinking towards faith and spirituality. From Adelaide Harris and the pioneering church of St James and Emmanuel in Didsbury Village, to Saha (Surabhi Kandaswamy), a trans woman who moved to the UK from Southern India and feels connected to her ancestry and queerness through the birds, butterflies and old ruins found in Williamson Park, Preston.Their powerful ways of thinking about the...
2024-11-1944 minThe Quilt1 | The UnravellingThe city of Norwich, in East Anglia, has a history of welcoming strangers and people who are a bit different.In this episode, Adam meets some of Norfolk’s wonderful misfits. From Serena James, an older trans woman who discovered a remarkable photograph from the 1960s, to Steve Peck, who bought a shirt 40 years ago on a memorable holiday. Finally there’s Beau Brannick and Alice Bigsby-Bye, who brought together a whole community to make a gorgeous (and now famous) quilt. He’s also given a local history tour by Adam Baker from Queer Norfolk....
2024-11-1252 minThe QuiltIntroducing... The QuiltFrom the producers of the award-winning podcast The Log Books, The Quilt is a new queer history podcast featuring untold stories that are rooted all around the UK.In this short intro episode, hosts Tash Walker and Adam Zmith head back into the studio to plan the new series. We’ve partnered with Queer Britain, the UK’s first LGBTQ+ museum, to travel around the UK collecting intriguing, moving, and deeply important stories from the queer family.Hit follow or subscribe now to hear the first full episode when it lands... coming soon!
2024-11-0405 minFree Sex033 - Open desires - Liam WignallWhat if... we could see everyone’s intimate sexual desires?My guest in this episode is Liam Wignall, a researcher, lecturer and writer specialising in the role of the internet in our sex lives, especially for kinky people. Liam’s got a fun idea: imagine if we all wore some X-ray specs that revealed everyone else’s sexual tastes. Liam thinks we could get to a world of free sex if only our desires were more visible. Liam and I tested out the idea of the XXX-ray sex specs in our conversation. We explore...
2024-10-2840 minFree Sex032 - Free choice - Kitty DrakeWhy do we desire what we desire?*This episode discusses sexual assault and an alleged case of rape*My guest in this episode is Kitty Drake, a journalist who interviews a lot of people about the sex they have. Kitty helped me to see that we could approach a free-sex world if we’re able to give ourselves over to sex while at the same time hold space for reflecting on why we fancy it. How are our desires shaped by the politics and societies that we live in?Kitty wr...
2024-10-2141 minFree Sex031 - Denied sex - Claire BatesHow are people with learning disabilities held back from sex?My guest in this episode is Claire Bates who runs a network for people with learning disabilities, supporting them in sex and relationships. Through her work with Supported Loving Claire has tracked all the ways that people with disabilities are held back from the sex they want to have — whether it’s discriminatory laws or unhelpful staff in residential care homes.I learnt a lot from this conversation with Claire, about how the world of free sex would not be reached without including thos...
2024-10-1436 minFree Sex030 - ‘Clean’ bums - Henry BlestWhat if you could have anal sex without the shit?My guest in this episode is Henry Blest, “the most ambitious bottom in London”. It says that on his LinkedIn profile, honestly! Henry and I talked about the realities of anal sex, from the slipperiness of the term ‘clean’ to ‘taboo tech’, which is technology that faces stigma when trying to solve our problems.Henry is one half of a duo who have invented a device that means people wanting to have anal sex would not have to douche in order to avoid faecal matte...
2024-10-0739 minFree Sex029 - Sex is boring - Tina FetnerWhy do we need social norms around sex?My guest in this episode is Tina Fetner, a sociologist who has studied peoples’ sex lives in Canada. Tina walked me through her research into the who, why, when and how of sex, including what she’s discovered about masturbation habits, promiscuity and porn. And then we got into a conversation about the social norms of sex, which we all seem to measure ourselves against.What intrigued me the most about Tina’s ideas was how they encouraged me to think about the basis of the ‘f...
2024-09-3044 minFree Sex028 - Bi-curious play - Emma SayleWhat can bi-curious men learn from women?My guest in this episode is Emma Sayle who for two decades has been running glamorous sex parties that centre female pleasure. Many of the men who go to Emma’s Killing Kittens parties have wanted to play with other men, but feel some worries or shame about it. So now Emma is planning a party just for them.In this episode, Emma told me what she’s learnt from running Killing Kittens and how she intends to build a safe space for men to explore with...
2024-09-2340 min
Sing It Pink8 | Homemade Musical Hope MachineThe Pink Singers have reached the crescendo: their 40th anniversary gala performance!In this episode, Ev Callahan, the choir's new artistic director, goes backstage to find the pre-concert nerves on the eve of their birthday gala. Ev also travels back in time to the beginnings of the Pinkies, to tell the previously untold story of its co-creator Brian Kennedy. The series draws to a close at the rousing gala concert and a look forward to the future of this unique LGBTQ+ choir.Sing it Pink! is an Aunt Nell production for the Pink...
2024-09-2038 minFree Sex027 - Blue pills - Phil SambaWhen can we have all the sexual health services we need?My guest in this episode is Phil Samba, health promoter and the host of The Other Blue Pill podcast series. That show is about a pill called PrEP, which stops people getting HIV, and how campaigners fought legal battles for years to make it available to everyone in the UK. Phil is now trying to keep up that momentum in making all our sexual health needs available to everyone, in a way that works for them, all the time. Phil and I t...
2024-09-1638 minFree Sex026 - Queer hearts - Amanda MiddletonWhat can straight people learn from queer relationships?My guest in this episode is Amanda Middleton, a family and systemic psychotherapist. Amanda works with queer couples, families and polycules. Through decades of experience, she’s developed a fascinating practice that places queer attitudes at the heart of her work—and her insights now can benefit everybody.The point is that these queer approaches help us to get to a world where we can have the sex we want (not just queer sex, but freer sex). I also got to ask Amanda what she thin...
2024-09-0942 minSing It Pink7 | Chosen FamilyAs the Pinkies prepare for their 40th Gala performance, they take the opportunity to look at something the choir has always had in abundance: love. In this episode, Mills Dyer looks at how relationships have formed in the choir and how they’ve created harmonies and the occasional wrong note. From family to wife-swaps, from love to friendship, the Pinkies are forging new ways of living and loving.Sing it Pink! is an Aunt Nell production for the Pink Singers. You can find out more about the Pink Singers at https://www.pinksingers.co...
2024-09-0637 minSing It Pink6 | I Am What I AmMusic and song is something that transcends sexuality and gender, but society hasn’t always seen it that way. The Pink Singers are on a mission to change that, but have they always been that way? In this episode, Josi, a Pinkie performance poet who transitioned in their sixties, guides us through the history of choir members who go beyond the binary. Drawing on her own experience as a trans woman and police detective, she takes us through how voice parts aren’t the only thing that’s changed within the choir.Sing it Pink...
2024-08-3036 minSing It Pink5 | Change The World!From Finnish saunas to the streets of Mumbai, the Pink Singers have gone global. In this episode, Hsien Chew, founder of Proud Voices Asia, takes us on a tour through time and space with the Pink Singers. Taking us back to European choirs rallying behind the Pink Singers as Section 28 came into force, to activism through songs and protest across the world today. Sing it Pink! is an Aunt Nell production for the Pink Singers. You can find out more about the Pink Singers at https://www.pinksingers.co.uk/ or...
2024-08-2338 minSing It Pink4 | Fascinating RhythmThe Pink Singers are the oldest LGBTQ+ choir in Europe (if you’re to believe there’s ever been a heterosexual choir), but what makes up a choir? In this episode, Olivia Doust, a singing teacher by day, Pinkie by night, looks at the music that has made the Pink Singers sing, and how it’s been shaped by the treatment of LGBTQ+ people in society. But with their current musical director, Murray, leaving, and having only ever had cis male musical directors, will the music change tempo?Sing it Pink...
2024-08-1631 minSing It Pink3 | Leaping LesbiansAs the Pink Singers belt out songs from the roof of Broadcasting House, they make a vital call: We need more lesbians. In this episode, Ali Milton-Doyle, a Pinkie who met their wife in the choir, investigates why it is so hard finding the early women of the Pink Singers, and how the experiences of her fellow femme Pinkies has changed with separatism, Section 28 and song. Sing it Pink! is an Aunt Nell production for the Pink Singers. You can find out more about the Pink Singers at https://w...
2024-08-0939 minSing It Pink2 | Safer SexThe Pink Singers are taking off, performing, partying and fighting for LGBTQ+ rights. But soon they are hit by one of the greatest threats to LGBTQ+ people: the AIDS crisis. In this episode, Philip Rescorla, one of the choir’s oldest members, remembers how the choir experienced HIV, through the hospice visits, the friends he lost, and the songs that lifted their spirits even in the darkest days.Sing it Pink! is an Aunt Nell production for the Pink Singers. You can find out more about the Pink Singers at https://www.pinksingers.co...
2024-08-0241 minSing It Pink1 | Homosexual, Homosexual, Lesbian, LesbianIt’s 1983, and Mark Bunyan is making a splash on the cabaret scene in London. Inspired by gay activist Brian Kennedy, Mark advertises for singers who want to join an LGBTQ+ choir. But it’s a time of homophobia and shame, so will anyone turn up to the first rehearsal?In this episode, Cassian Fagilde, one of today's youngest Pink Singers, looks back at the choir’s origin story: how did an LGBTQ+ activist and a cabaret performer make a choir that has survived for 40 years? Who were the folks who turned up to that first rehear...
2024-07-2634 min
Fundraising Bright Spots158. Engage your community with a podcast, with Stephanie Fuller and Adam ZmithHave you ever thought about creating a podcast to engage your community?This time we look at an award-winning podcast, The Log Books, which has run for three successful seasons. Rob talks to Stephanie Fuller, CEO of Switchboard and Adam Zmith from Aunt Nell, who collaborated to create the show.We explore why and how they made it, how it helps the charity connect with its community, and other benefits the show has brought.Thank you for supporting our show, for example, by sharing it with colleagues or on social media. We are...
2024-07-2133 minFree Sex025 - Sex robots - Heather ParryWould sex robots be good for us?My guest in this episode is Heather Parry, who’s been wondering why we need sex robots. Heather is a writer of fiction and non-fiction, and she wrote a book called Electric Dreams: On Sex Robots and the Failed Promises of Capitalism. It’s a fascinating bipedal stroll through the growing industry of pimped-up sex dolls and the dreams of imagineers who predict a world with fleshy human-like sex robots.In researching the book Heather found that there are several factors connecting the people who want to h...
2024-04-2241 minFree Sex024 - Maximum intimacy - Nick WoofCan you be intimate with 200 people?My guest in this episode is Nick Woof, the founder of London’s edgiest erotic party, Bator Bros. The party is centred on the idea that we can enjoy intimacy and community in a sexual context. Imagine an orgy, but where you’re only allowed to use your hands (sorta). Nick explains how he developed the ideas that led to him to create this new type of sex party, and what we can all gain by thinking about intimacy and community differently. In Nick’s free sex world...
2024-04-1544 minFree Sex023 - Older people - Hayley ConyersDoes age matter?My guest in this episode is Hayley Conyers, who has been working as a research assistant at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, and specifically on a study into the sexual health of older adults. Many people assume that older people aren’t having sex, or that if they are, that’s gross. Well, both of those things are wrong, aren’t they? A free sex world is a world where we can have and enjoy healthy sex well into old age, if we want.The project Hayley worked...
2024-04-0839 minFree Sex022 - Slut power - Beth AshleyHow can we overcome slutshaming?My guest in this episode is Beth Ashley, author of Sluts: The Truth about Slutshaming and What We Can Do To Fight It. It’s a wide-ranging book that pulls together history, politics, class, identity, gender and activism, to try to understand the resurgence of slutshaming. Thankfully Beth also has tons of actions that we can all take to fight back.I remember telling my mum once that I like sex with different people, and she called me a slut. I laughed it off but, of course, I al...
2024-04-0149 minFree Sex021 - Bye bye, bisexual men - Lewis OakleyWhy don’t some women want to date bisexual men?My guest in this episode is Lewis Oakley, a bisexual activist. Lewis has experienced prejudice from women who tell him to his face that even if they like him, they won’t date him due to his history of gay sex. This is one of the many ways that biphobia not only endures, but seems to go unchecked. So Lewis is on a mission to change that attitude, through writing and speaking on the subject, and hosting the Bisexual Brunch podcast.He tells me a...
2024-03-2548 minFree Sex020 - Sexual free speech - Pup DaveyShould we show off our kinky selves in public?My guest in this episode is Pup Davey, who is a pornstar and all-round kinky queer person. He makes a living from kinky sex videos and he wants the freedom to share them. Davey and I talked about the limits in society on our freedom to express ourselves sexually (especially if we’re kinky). This includes battling online censorship and wearing kinky clothes in the street. One of Davey’s stories is about a day he was wearing a pup collar in public, and a fri...
2024-03-1834 minFree Sex019 - Too much sex - Mark WaltonIs it possible to have too much sex?My guest in this episode is Mark Walton, who thinks the answer is yes. Mark has a history of compulsive sexual behaviour. This wasn’t healthy for Mark, so to move forward he used a combination of therapy, groups, and the book Overcoming Sex Addiction by Thaddeus Birchhardt.Mark is very sex positive, and wants everyone to have the sex they want. But when it leads to negative behaviour patterns, he thinks we need to take care of each other better. Because of what he’s be...
2024-03-1142 minFree Sex018 - Fat sex - Gina TonicWill ‘body positivity’ actually end fatphobia?My guest in this episode is Gina Tonic, who is a writer and the host of The Polyester Podcast. Gina tells me that free sex would mean pleasure without limitation—and we talked a lot about how fatphobia limits us all. Gina walks me through fat liberation, why queer spaces are fat-friendly pioneers, the personal politics of fetishisation... and why ‘body positivity’ is usually just a buzzword to sell razors. Thanks to my listener Gianluca for recommending the topic of ‘fatness and sex’. I went straight to Gina with it, b...
2024-03-0440 minFree Sex017 - Big erection data - Dr Elliot JustinShould doctors be prescribing orgasm?My guest in this episode is Dr Elliot Justin. Elliot has a background in emergency medicine, but recently he’s been busy inventing a pretty fancy cock ring. Elliot is really into men’s erectile fitness, because it can tell doctors like him a lot about the patient’s overall health. So the cock ring developed by his company, FirmTech, claims to be comfortable enough to be worn for long periods AND smart enough to collect data on things like blood flow. Elliot and I also talked about why doc...
2024-02-2638 minFree Sex016 - Masturbation for all - Vic LiuMy guest in this episode is Vic Liu, an artist and information designer who makes books that aim to make the world a little better. One way the world could be a little better is probably if we all had better wank-lives. Who needs a sex life, if your wank life is hot and fulfilling?One of Vic’s books is BANG!, which is a guide about masturbation for people of all genders and abilities. The book busts the myths that stop us busting our nuts, suggests various techniques to try on yourself, or a partner, an...
2024-02-1938 minFree Sex015 - Poly possibility - Libro Levi BridgemanCould we have a polyamorous world?My guest in this episode is Libro Levi Bridgeman, a writer, performer, the editor of Hot Pencil Press, and a ‘solo poly’ person. Libro’s been on quite the journey with sex since the 80s—from butch dyke to nonbinary legend, and lots in between. Libro’s story is one of periodic monogamy, gender-affirming surgery, caring for others, and the freedom that can arrive in your 50s. They are provocative, inclusive—and dead entertaining. I loved discussing with them how a free-sex world would empower people to be the gender...
2024-02-1235 minFree Sex014 - What do you like? - Susan BrattonCan we make it easier to say what we want in sex? My guest in this episode is Susan Bratton. As an intimacy adviser and wellness expert, Susan has no end of talking techniques, libido botanicals, blood-flow supplements and sexual energy bars to help us all to have better sex. Susan’s having the best sex of her life in her 60s—and she wants you and me to share the joy!But better sex isn’t enough. Susan and I went... deeper. We discussed the conditions in society that weaken our sexual communi...
2024-02-0540 minFree Sex013 - Take care - Dani SingerHow can we take care of each other? My guest in this episode is Dani Singer aka Dani Dinger, who is a performer, sex worker, activist and an expert in nightlife welfare. If you want to know how to run a good sex party, speak to Dani. They co-founded an agency called Safe Only to do exactly this. Dani and the folks at Safe Only have a deep understanding of how to mould space and time so that it is sexy and free, while also taking care of the people in it. After th...
2024-01-2939 minFree Sex012 - Pleasure for the good of our health - Jozef ShawIsn’t pleasure a part of good sexual health?My guest in this episode is Dr Jozef Shaw. Joe works in a hospital in London, practising sexual health, HIV and general internal medicine. He’s used to seeing patients with genital symptoms, giving them treatment, and then sending them home. But there’s so much that’s missing from this medicalised approach to sexual health...So Joe tells me his big idea for holistic services around sex, that include fighting infections of course, but also therapy, conversations about relationships, and even more support around p...
2024-01-2237 min
Unlawful KillingUnlawful Killing: Mental Health Part 2 | Episode 6Matthew Leahy, 20, died in the care of Essex mental health services. A critical inquest and multiple investigations later, and still his mother Melanie Leahy does not know the truth about what happened to Matthew.Lucy speaks to Melanie about what Matthew meant to her, her relentless campaign for justice and why securing the first ever public inquiry into deaths in mental health services is so important.Lucy and Lee reflect on campaigning, what drives families to fight, and the strength in learning from others who know your pain.
2024-01-1833 minFree Sex011 - Kinky showtime - Dan DawHow can a submissive disabled person get the sex they want?My guest in this episode is Dan Daw — an exquisite performer with huge ideas and an electrifying stage presence. They made The Dan Daw Show, which knocked my socks off the first time I saw it (I went back and saw it again!). Dan’s show feels like the world of free sex I’m craving, so I knew we had to speak about it. The show is also a smash hit, selling out theatres since 2021.Dan’s work is so special because i...
2024-01-1541 minUnlawful KillingUnlawful Killing: Mental Health Part 1 | Episode 5Mental health services are often framed as the caring alternative to policing and prisons. But Lucy and Lee look at what happens when the very system designed to protect us, fails to do just that. Mikey Powell, 38, and Jess Durdy, 27, both died whilst in mental health crisis. Two very different stories. Two decades apart. Through these two very different instances of state violence and neglect, Lucy and Lee look at just how far-reaching the scale of the problem is, and the communities it harms the most. We hear from Mikey’s cousin Tippa...
2024-01-1128 minFree Sex010 - Less sex, please? - Rosie WilbyWhy are we having less sex?My guest in this episode is the author and comedian Rosie Wilby. Rosie is wondering why surveys are showing that people, especially the young ones, are having less sex than they used to. She’s also reflecting on how relationships change the kind of sex we fancy, and how the stereotypes of gay men and lesbians with regard to sex stand up to scrutiny... This was a really fun and funny chat, taking in the breadth of Rosie’s interests and our observations as a gay man and a...
2024-01-0837 minFree Sex009 - Risk! - Tina HornCan we calculate risk at the same time as trying to nut with someone?My guest in this episode is Tina Horn, who is a writer and perv, just like me. She’s really into helping us all figure out how to reduce harm during sex and staying horny while also thinking about the risk of sex.I came across Tina when she was hosting a Wondery podcast called Operator, about the sex workers who ran phone lines in the 90s. She’s also the host-producer of Why Are People Into That?, a podc...
2024-01-0138 minFree Sex008 - Sex in Public - Jackson KingWhy can’t we have sex in public?My guest in this episode is Jackson King, a writer, journalist and pro dom (professional dominant). Jackson’s way to free sex is through the political and public liberation of sex. In this interview, he breaks this all down for me: from legal rights, to the priorities of the LGBTQ+ movement, from what it means to have complete control over your own body, and to how sex cops are policing us. We talk about kinky sex parties, how sex was completely forgotten about during the Covid lockd...
2023-12-1844 minUnlawful KillingUnlawful Killing: Prisons Part 2 | Episode 4Liridon Saliuka, 29, took his own life whilst awaiting trail for joint enterprise charges at Belmarsh prison in London.Last year, an inquest into his death found that ill treatment and dismissiveness of his disability by prison staff contributed to his death.Lucy and Lee speak to Liridon’s sister Dita Saliuka, about what he meant to her, disability discrimination, and why prisons aren’t safe for anyone.Dita and Lee draw parallels between their experiences of caring for their loved ones, grieving their deaths and finding the strength to continue the...
2023-12-1435 minFree Sex007 - Sex therapy - Dr Lori Beth BisbeyHow can therapy help us to have better sex?My guest in this episode is Dr Lori Beth Bisbey. Not gonna lie: since I watched Dr Lori counsel countless couples into opening up their relationship on a reality TV show called Open House: The Great British Sex Experiment, I’ve been a bit obsessed with her. Dr Lori has decades of experience as a therapist, specialising in sex and relationships (and especially kink stuff), and she’s got a brilliant way of communicating about all these complex factors. In this interview, Dr Lori share...
2023-12-1145 minUnlawful KillingUnlawful Killing: Prisons Part 1 | Episode 3Every year hundreds of people die in prisons in the UK. We’ll be asking why so many people are dying, why so few people are talking about it, and hearing more about the communities and families that these deaths tear apart. In this episode, Lucy Brisbane and Lee Lawrence look at the children and young people who have died in prisons in the past, and how family led campaigns have led to vital changes which continue to save lives. Joseph Scholes, 16, and Jake Foxall, 19, both died self-inflicted deaths in young offenders' prisons, over...
2023-12-0729 minFree Sex006 - Gay shame - José Carlos MejiaCan you imagine a world without any shame?My guest in this episode is José Carlos Mejia, who told me the three things we’d need to eliminate if we want to have free sex. Shame, judgement and expectation — they’re all heavy obstacles, but in José’s hands they just crumble. When I was developing the idea for this podcast, José was one of the people I spoke to. He thinks deeply and clearly about sex, so after a long coffee date with him I came away with the idea that became Free Sex. I...
2023-12-0448 minUnlawful KillingUnlawful Killing: Policing Part 2 | Episode 2Chris Kaba was fatally shot by a Metropolitan police officer in September 2022. He was unarmed. Now, the officer who fired that shot has been charged with murder. His death brought renewed attention to policing in the UK and its fatal consequences. In this episode, Lucy Brisbane and Lee Lawrence speak to Chris’ father, Prosper Kaba, about his son’s death, his family’s fight for justice and who Chris really was. Prosper and Lee draw parallels between their experiences as campaigning family members, whose loved ones' deaths have raised big questions...
2023-11-3033 minFree Sex005 - Sex health inequality - Dr Rageshri DhairyawanWhy are South Asian people in the UK getting more STIs?My guest this episode is Dr Rageshri Dhairyawan. In treating her patients in HIV and sexual health in east London, UK, Rageshri noticed that STI diagnoses in South Asian people were growing, and that they have less knowledge of HIV than other groups do. When Rageshri researched what was going on, she was shocked to find that doctors have known about these ethnic inequalities in sexual health since the 1950s. Why hasn’t this disparity been fixed?In talking with me about ho...
2023-11-2736 minUnlawful KillingUnlawful Killing: Policing Part 1 | Episode 1Since INQUEST was founded in 1981, it has recorded almost 2000 deaths involving the police.In this episode, Lucy Brisbane and Lee Lawrence take you right back to one of the cases that led to INQUEST being set up to respond to these deaths: the killing of Blair Peach in 1979.Just a few years later, Lee’s mother Cherry Groce was shot by Brixton police, sparking the 1985 Brixton uprisings.This episode features Celia Stubbs, the partner of Blair Peach, founder member of INQUEST and a core participant in the Undercover Policing Inquiry....
2023-11-2324 minFree Sex004 - You’re not normal - Girl On The NetWhy do we want to be cool during sex?My guest this episode is Sarah from Girl On The Net — one of the hottest sex blogs in the world. Sarah is a lightning rod for peoples’ fantasies, and over 12 years running her blog she’s learnt what would be the things that help us create a free-sex world. So she and I discuss the removal of the pressure to be cool, clean and normal. Poo happens!Supported by fans on Patreon, Girl On The Net is an amazing and expansive independent universe of smut. S...
2023-11-2043 minUnlawful KillingUnlawful Killing: Introduction | Episode 0Every year, hundreds of people die at the hands of the very institutions that are meant to keep us safe – police, prisons, and mental health services.Bereaved families are left fighting for answers, demanding justice, and campaigning for change. Since 1981, the charity INQUEST has been fighting alongside these families.Unlawful Killing is a unique podcast series shining a light on state violence, death, grief and resistance.In this introductory episode, Lucy Brisbane and Lee Lawrence begin their journey to understanding the deep rooted issues of state violence and neglect in Br...
2023-11-1605 minFree Sex003 - Body Hair is Gorgeous! - Asad ZafarDo I have to remove my body hair to get better sex?My guest in this episode is Asad Zafar, the non-binary slut-dragon of your dreamz. They are tall, queer and hairy—and after years of reflection, they now love this about themself. Asad tells me about how their conservative Pakistani Muslim family shielded them from the baby-slut they knew they were. So Asad’s prescription for a free-sex world is about finding ways to accept our sluttiness. Asad also shared insights from their work in sexual health testing. Their experience brings up many...
2023-11-1332 minFree Sex002 - Sex Whilst Disabled - Andrew GurzaWhat stops a disabled person from hooking up with someone?My guest this episode is Andrew Gurza. Andrew is dedicated to the same thing as me — removing the barriers that hold people back from having the sex they want. So the answer to that question above is ableism, which is discrimination that favours people who are able-bodied. From their home in Canada, Andrew told me about their experiences hooking up as a wheelchair user, buying sex work, consulting on TV shows featuring disabled people, and why sex is a part of a person’s ove...
2023-11-1340 minFree Sex001 - No Censorship! - Reed AmberWhy can’t sex workers have an Instagram account?My guest this episode is Reed Amber, a sex worker, educator, anti-shamer and activist. Reed has worked in the adult industry for over 10 years, and has built a huge audience for her sexy content, campaigns about loving your own sexual body, AND a podcast called F**ks Given.But social media makes life difficult for her — blocking her accounts, promoting trolls and restricting her ability to grow an audience and work. All because her theme is sex. Based in London, Reed told me all about...
2023-11-1342 minFree SexTrailer: Free Sex with Adam ZmithComing soon from Aunt Nell — the team behind the award-winning podcasts The Log Books, Queer Roots and Routes, and Black And Gay, Back In The Day.In Free Sex, Adam Zmith speaks to a different guest every episode to ask what a world of free sex would look like. In hearing from kinksters, sexual health doctors, writers, sex workers, therapists — and anyone with a fresh perspective on sex — Adam is building an image for a future where we are not held back in sex.From mild to wild, everyone is welcome.
2023-11-0203 min
The Log BooksIntroducing: Queer Roots and RoutesWe'd love to introduce you to this new podcast we've been working Queer Roots and Routes!Queer Roots and Routes is made by a collective. We are queer. We are migrants or descended from migrants. And we want to tell our stories. Stories of where we’ve come from and how we move in the world today.We don’t have a boss or a Beyoncé. So each episode of this six-part first series of Queer Roots and Routes has a different host and a different set of voices from our gr...
2023-04-0500 min