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Showing episodes and shows of
Ashlea Dillard
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Sit Around the Fire
#026 William Person: Olympic Team USA Bobsled Athlete Healing CTE And On A Mission To Help
Send us a textWhat if the fog, forgetfulness, and mood storms aren’t a failing mind—but an injured one that’s never been treated? We sit down with former Team USA bobsledder William Pearson to trace the slow, frightening slide into CTE symptoms—and the moment oxygen, pressure, and persistence turned the lights back on.William takes us inside the daily reality of brain trauma that hides in plain sight: random days of clarity, panic waking in unfamiliar rooms, losing track of time, and not recognizing familiar faces. He explains why micro concussions are so d...
2025-11-25
1h 06
Sit Around the Fire
#025 CELEBRATE! One Year Around The Fire...
Send us a textThe crackle you hear isn’t just the intro—it’s a year of voices catching flame. We’re celebrating twelve months of honest conversations with flight nurses, paramedics, firefighters, spouses, mental health pros, and advocates who turned raw experience into practical wisdom. This anniversary brings back the moments that stuck: naming PTSD when a minor scare sparks a major reaction, watching compassion fatigue harden a caregiver’s voice, and choosing help even when secrecy feels safer.We revisit the foundation of this community—no one has to pretend they’re fine here—and...
2025-11-19
57 min
Sit Around the Fire
#023 Margaux Aime: From Grief To Grit: A Producer Rebuilds Purpose Through Storytelling
Send us a textA simple mantra drives this conversation and the life behind it: keep it moving. Margot, the founder of True Self Films, shares how losing her grandmother, mother, and husband in three consecutive years forced a complete reset. Stoicism stopped working. Therapy, chosen intentionally without medication through a university program, became the bridge from paralysis to purposeful action. We walk through the moments that rebuilt her support system, from finding people who celebrate her wins to learning how to stagger asks so friends aren’t overwhelmed.From there, Margot flips the script on...
2025-11-10
44 min
Sit Around the Fire
#023: The 5 Non-Negotiables
Send us a textEver feel like you’re doing everything and still not moving forward? We break down the five non-negotiables that quietly determine whether life feels scattered or deeply aligned: spirituality, mental and emotional health, physical health, career and finances, and relationships. Rather than chasing hacks, we focus on clear priorities, practical routines, and beliefs that actually support growth.We start with spirituality as inner connection—no dogma, just simple practices to get quiet, breathe, and listen. A few minutes of morning and evening stillness, paired with time outside, can reset your nervous syst...
2025-11-04
32 min
Doc Jacques: Your Addiction Lifeguard
Coping With Burnout
Send us a textWhat is it like to reach compassion fatigue and coping with it through addiction. Special guest Ashlea Dillard, retired Firefighter and now mental health counselor, as she discusses compassion fatigue and burnout with negative and faulty coping mechanisms. Her podcast is https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sit-around-the-fire/id1779172848Support the show
2025-11-04
48 min
Sit Around the Fire
#022: Jennifer Kaufman: Supporting Autism on the Front Lines: Tools, Tactics, and Trust for First Responders and Families
Send us a textSirens, bright lights, crowded scenes—now imagine all of that with a nervous system tuned to notice every sound and sensation at full volume. We sit down with school principal and trainer Jennifer Kaufman to unpack how autism can look like “defiance” or “intoxication” in the field—and why small, precise shifts from first responders can completely change the outcome.Jennifer shares a practical playbook for police, firefighters, EMS, and dispatch: trade “calm down” for literal, single-step instructions; build in longer pauses for processing; use one clear voice instead of a crowd; and keep...
2025-10-28
49 min
Sit Around the Fire
#021 Chef Calvin: From Texas BBQ to Plant-Powered: A Chef’s Journey to Fuel First Responders
Send us a textWhat if the best meal of the day also became the calmest moment of your week? We sit down with Chef Calvin—Texas-born, French-trained, and the mind behind R&D at Burger King and Arby’s—to talk about fueling first responders with fast, affordable, wildly flavorful meals that actually support long-term health. From pecan-smoked brisket memories to the science of perfect fries, he breaks down how to build big taste with simple systems that work in real kitchens under real pressure.Calvin shares a deeply personal turn: beating prostate cancer, confro...
2025-10-20
56 min
Sit Around the Fire
#020 You Don't Need to Wait Until You're Broken to Seek Help
Send us a textHave you ever caught yourself wondering if your problems are "big enough" to justify therapy? Or perhaps you've thought, "Other people have it worse" or "I just need to tough it out." You're not alone. Many of us operate with an invisible scale of suffering, waiting until we hit rock bottom before reaching out for help.This episode challenges that mindset completely. What if therapy isn't about waiting until you're broken, but instead functions more like routine maintenance? We take care of our cars with regular oil changes and our bodies...
2025-10-08
37 min
Sit Around the Fire
#019 Steve Orr: Warning Lights on the Dashboard: When Your Job Is Killing You
Send us a text"The greatest job in the world is actually destroying me." These powerful words capture the hidden struggle many first responders face behind their heroic image. In this raw, vulnerable conversation, former firefighter/paramedic Steve Orr bravely shares his 22-year journey through the fire service and the toll it took on his mental health.Steve opens up about the gradual onset of compassion fatigue and PTSD – how his nervous system became so dysregulated that even putting his son in pajamas felt like an emergency. He describes the warning signs he initially missed: un...
2025-09-24
1h 24
Sit Around the Fire
#018 Stop Saying "You" and Start Saving Your Relationship
Send us a textWhat happens when a volcano comes home after shift? That's how one firefighter's spouse described living with a first responder - unpredictable eruptions following periods of concerning quiet. Communication becomes the lifeline that either saves or sinks these relationships.Drawing from real feedback from first responders with 25+ years of service, this episode dives into the unique communication challenges faced by emergency personnel and their partners. From the inability to empathize with "civilian problems" after witnessing trauma to the struggle of being present when exhausted, we unpack what makes these relationships particularly...
2025-09-08
55 min
Sit Around the Fire
#017 What's Running Your Life? Hint: It's Not Your Conscious Thoughts
Send us a textHave you ever wondered why you keep repeating the same patterns despite your best efforts to change? The answer lies deep within your mind's operating system – and it's more powerful than you might realize.Dive into the fascinating architecture of your mind as we explore the intricate relationship between the conscious mind, subconscious mind, and the critical factor. This episode reveals how these three components work together to shape virtually every aspect of your reality – from your automatic behaviors to your emotional responses and even your life outcomes.Your subc...
2025-08-27
43 min
Sit Around the Fire
#016 Egan de los Cobos: The Body Remembers, The Soul Responds: A Firefighter’s Journey Through PTSD, Transformation, & Healing
Send us a textA devastating accident forever changed firefighter paramedic Egan De Los Cobos' life when a car plowed through a coffee shop patio where he sat with his three-year-old son. Though they survived physically, the psychological trauma triggered a cascade of mysterious health problems no doctor could explain. For years, Egan suffered silently with undiagnosed PTSD and progressively worsening autoimmune disease, afraid that seeking help might end his career.Egan shares the raw reality of what happens when trauma takes root in both mind and body. With remarkable candor, he details his journey...
2025-07-08
1h 13
Sit Around the Fire
#015 Beyond the Critical Factor: Can Ketamine Help You Access Hidden Healing?
Send us a textHave you ever felt stuck despite trying "all the right things"? Talk therapy, medication, pushing through—and yet those same patterns keep emerging, those same wounds keep reopening. You're not alone, especially if you're a first responder.Ketamine-Assisted Psychotherapy (KAP) offers a fundamentally different approach to healing trauma and breaking through stubborn mental barriers. Unlike traditional therapies that work primarily with the conscious mind, ketamine temporarily bypasses what therapists call the "critical factor"—that internal gatekeeper that often rejects new perspectives about ourselves, especially healing ones.The science behind KAP...
2025-06-28
33 min
Sit Around the Fire
#014: Melissa Alvarez: Behind the Flame: A Firefighter's Wife Speaks
Send us a textWhat happens when the fire trucks leave the station and first responders head home? For the families left behind, a unique journey unfolds – one filled with both challenges and profound strength.Melissa opens her heart about life as a firefighter's wife and mother, revealing the emotional reality behind the scenes. "We are holding it down at home," she shares, fighting back tears as she describes the invisible load carried by first responder families. Having navigated this lifestyle for over a decade while raising young children, she offers wisdom that only experience ca...
2025-06-09
57 min
Sit Around the Fire
#013 The Costume Closet: False Identities
Send us a textWho are you when the uniform comes off? When the relationship ends? When the bank account empties? Today's powerful exploration challenges us to look beyond the external identities we cling to and discover our authentic selves.Many of us become deeply attached to our professional roles, introducing ourselves first by our job titles. I share my personal journey of identity crisis after leaving my firefighter paramedic career—how the admiration and status that came with the uniform became addictive, and how disorienting it felt when that identity fell away. This experience mi...
2025-05-08
26 min
Sit Around the Fire
#012: Addicted to Suffering: Choosing the Hell We Know
Send us a textWhy do we cling so tightly to the very things that cause us pain? It's a question that cuts to the heart of the human experience, and one that reveals a startling truth: we often become addicted to our own suffering. I share how we frequently choose "the hell we know over the heaven we don't" because our subconscious mind perceives familiar pain as safe, even when it's destroying us. This isn't about self-sabotage—it's about how our brains are wired for survival and predictability, even at the cost of our wel...
2025-03-25
39 min
Sit Around the Fire
#011 Stress & Fear: Beyond the Job
Send us a textWhat if the root of your stress and anxiety could be addressed through understanding? In this enlightening episode, we tackle the complex interplay of stress and fear that many of us face daily. With staggering statistics revealing that 70% of Americans grapple with stress regularly, it is time to confront these feelings rather than allow them to control our lives.We dive deep into the science behind stress—distinguishing between acute and chronic forms and highlighting how they affect our mental well-being. Moreover, we reflect on the common stressors in our lives, fr...
2025-03-03
50 min
Sit Around the Fire
#010 Find Your Why, Change Your Life
Send us a textWhat drives first responders to keep going in the face of adversity? Join me, Ashlea, as we explore this profound question through the wisdom of Viktor Frankl, Martin Seligman, and Dr. Joe Dispenza. Discover how understanding our "why" can ignite passion and courage, transforming our roles and preventing burnout. These thinkers share insights into resilience and purpose, offering guidance on how to integrate our passions and talents into our professional lives, with empathy and strength leading the way.Embrace the full spectrum of happiness, from the simple pleasures in life to...
2025-02-10
57 min
Sit Around the Fire
#009 Pam Howes: Family, Flight, and Finding Balance
Send us a textPam's journey into emergency medical services started with an unplanned decision that blossomed into a nearly three-decade-long career. What began as a spontaneous leap into an EMT class has evolved into a remarkable life in EMS, from working with MedTrans Ambulance and Pride Mark Paramedics to soaring the skies as a flight nurse. Pam’s experiences offer a powerful narrative on the impact of small choices and the profound influence of family, as her own children pursue careers in service-oriented roles, inspired by their mother and father's dedication to community service.Ou...
2025-01-27
52 min
Sit Around the Fire
#008 "Hi. My name is Ashlea, and I am a recovering 'fawner.'
Send us a textUnlock the mystery of the fawn response, a survival mechanism that might be influencing your relationships more than you realize. Can the art of appeasement be a hidden threat to your authenticity? Join us as we dissect how inviting a metaphorical lion to tea might be more than just a quirky metaphor—it’s a coping strategy that can lead to codependency and self-abandonment. This episode promises to shed light on the fawn response and its impact on maintaining genuine connections without sacrificing self-honesty.We also untangle the complex dance between auth...
2025-01-20
43 min
Sit Around the Fire
#007 The Fainting Goat: Freeze Response
Send us a textWhat if the very mechanism meant to protect you could also hold you back? Join us as we unravel the intricate dance between the body's freeze response and functional freeze, vivid reflections of our physiological battle when faced with overwhelming stress and trauma. Picture a gazelle frozen under a predator's gaze—it's a vivid metaphor for how our own nervous systems react under threat, toggling between activity and immobility. Through personal experiences and vivid storytelling, we confront the daunting interplay of our sympathetic and parasympathetic systems, often leaving us teetering between action and sh...
2025-01-14
27 min
Sit Around the Fire
#006 The Ditirro's: Enduring Partnership: Balancing Fire Service Life, Family, and New Beginnings with LeAnne and Danny
Send us a text 🔥Let's Be Friends https://www.facebook.com/share/1EjJ6tMtyk/?mibextid=wwXIfr https://www.instagram.com/sitaroundthefire.co?igsh=MTN2OTljNTNqYjJwaw%3D%3D&utm_source=qr https://www.tiktok.com/@sitaroundthefire.co?_t=ZP-8zNMiGL9hl8&_r=1
2025-01-07
57 min
Sit Around the Fire
#005 Pete DePrez: Reframing Trauma, Mental Health, and Recovery
Send us a textWhat if the heroes who rush toward danger need saving themselves? Join us as Pete, a former sheriff deputy, SWAT member, FTO, and fire arms instructor in Colorado, opens up about his arduous journey through trauma, mental health struggles, and recovery. With service spanning over a decade, Pete shares his deeply personal story, from a head injury at 18 months old to the relentless challenges faced in law enforcement. His struggle with chronic sleep issues led to alcohol addiction, a battle he eventually conquered, illuminating the often unseen mental health battles that first responders...
2024-12-16
1h 33
Sit Around the Fire
#004 UFC Match: FIGHT: Attack before the threat attacks
Send us a textDiscover the hidden connections within your brain and how they shape your responses to stress and trauma. Ever wondered why certain situations trigger intense emotions out of nowhere? We explore the concept of emotional flashbacks and neurotags, revealing how past experiences intertwine with present triggers to ignite these powerful reactions. Through relatable scenarios, we explain the science behind this phenomenon, demonstrating why the phrase "neurons that fire together wire together" holds so much significance in understanding our emotional responses.We delve into the dual nature of anger, contrasting the destructive force...
2024-12-11
32 min
Sit Around the Fire
#003 Protective Output: FLIGHT "Can I Escape?"
Send us a textUnlock the secrets of your brain's survival instincts as we explore the protective outputs of the nervous system, focusing on the well-known responses of fight, flight, freeze, and fawn. Learn how understanding these mechanisms can empower you to manage anxiety and improve your emotional regulation. We'll discuss how the amygdala, our brain's alarm system, sometimes triggers heightened responses even in safe settings, and why recognizing these signals can transform how we interact with the world.Dive into the intricate dance of the flight response, especially pertinent to those in high-stress roles...
2024-12-02
40 min