Shows
The Highly Sensitive Woman | Confidence | Set Boundaries | Self-acceptance | Find Your Purpose | Self-esteem48 | From Chronic Stress & Survival Mode to Self-Trust & Subconscious Healing - with Ashlea Dillard - Part 1What happens when a highly sensitive woman builds a career in one of the most high-stress, male-dominated professions and begins to realize her body is paying the price?
In Part 1 of this two-part conversation, I’m joined by Ashlea Dillard, firefighter-paramedic turned Licensed Professional Counselor and Certified Clinical & Transpersonal Hypnotherapist. We explore what it was like for her to navigate emotional depth in a culture that often rewards emotional suppression, and how years of emergency response impacted her nervous system, energy, and hormones.
This episode dives into the physiological side of sensitivity and why chronic st...
2026-02-0526 min
Stuart Sax: Someone You Should KnowSomeone You Should Know with Host Stuart Sax and Guest Ashlea DillardToday on "Someone You Should Know," Stuart welcomes to the show Ashlea Dillard, a former firefighter/paramedic who transitioned into counseling others dealing with suffering and mental health issues.Check out Ashlea's website at https://ashleadillard.com and her podcast at https://sitaroundthefire.orgJoin us on the 1st and 3rd Wednesdays on Facebook, LinkedIn, or YouTube.#SomeoneYouShouldKnow #StuartSax #podcast #mentalwellness #PTSD #therapy #firefighter #paramedic #healer #hypnotherpyEach week, Stuart Sax interviews Someone You Should Know. Get to know people who have incredible stories t...
2026-02-0444 min
Sit Around the Fire#035 Chris Tiller: The Fire Service Is Changing: Generations, Call Volume, and the CostThe conversation with Chris Tiller delves into the generational gap in the fire service and the impact of technology on communication and community within the service. It explores recruitment challenges, leadership's role in mental health support, and the evolving identity and community dynamics in the fire service. The conversation delves into the impact of call volume and the types of calls on firefighters, highlighting the strain on the system and the toll it takes on the individuals. It also explores the changing nature of emergency calls and the challenges faced by firefighters in responding to non-emergency situations.
2026-01-271h 45
Sit Around the Fire#034: The Power of Emotions: Understanding and Managing Your FeelingsThe conversation delves into the exploration of emotions and their impact on behavior and well-being. It discusses the two methods of dealing with emotions, the importance of stepping out of emotions and processing them, practical steps for dealing with emotions, and the concept of letting emotions burn off.TakeawaysUnderstanding the cascade of thoughts, emotions, and behaviorsThe importance of being with and processing emotionsChapters00:00 Exploring Emotions and Their Impact11:04 Stepping Out of Emotions and Processing Them17:45 Practical Steps for Dealing with Emotions24:14 Letting Emotions Burn Off...
2026-01-2129 min
Across The PondFrom Firefighting to Healing with Ashlea DillardIn this enlightening conversation, Ashlea Dillard shares her journey from being a firefighter to a mental health professional, emphasizing the unique challenges faced by first responders. She discusses the impact of trauma on their mental health, the societal expectations that contribute to their struggles, and the importance of proactive self-care.Ashlea also delves into her therapeutic practices, including hypnotherapy and psychedelic-assisted therapy, highlighting their effectiveness in addressing deep-seated issues and generational trauma.The discussion culminates in a reflection on the collective awakening towards healing and personal growth.Want to hear more from Ashlea? Visit...
2026-01-171h 06
Sit Around the Fire#033 Breaking Free: Your Thoughts Become Your RealityIn this episode, Ashlea Dillard explores the profound impact of our thoughts on our physical and emotional well-being. She emphasizes the importance of awareness in recognizing negative self-talk and its effects on the subconscious mind. Dillard discusses the consequences of chronic stress and the necessity of breaking free from old patterns that no longer serve us. She encourages listeners to embrace change, let go of limiting beliefs, and actively choose thoughts that empower them to create a new reality.TakeawaysOur thoughts send direct signals to our body.The subconscious mind operates 24/7...
2026-01-1126 min
Sit Around the Fire#032 Robert Tornabene: Breaking the Silence: Mental Health in Law EnforcementIn this conversation, Ashlea Dillard interviews Robert Tornabene, a retired police officer from Chicago, who shares his insights on mental health, leadership, and the challenges faced by law enforcement officers. Robert emphasizes the importance of self-care, the stigma surrounding mental health in policing, and the need for open communication in relationships. He also discusses the unique challenges faced by Chicago police, including high suicide rates and the impact of political climate on morale. Throughout the conversation, Robert offers valuable advice for new officers and highlights the significance of finding balance and pursuing hobbies outside of work.
2025-12-3054 minSit Around the Fire#031 Grief & Loss from My HeartIn this heartfelt conversation, Ashlea Dillard shares her personal journey through grief and loss, emphasizing the importance of accepting and living through these emotions rather than resisting them. She discusses the illusion of returning to a 'normal' state after loss, the unconditional nature of peace, and the significance of finding purpose amidst pain. Ashlea encourages listeners to embrace their authentic emotional experiences and highlights the support available during difficult times.TakeawaysGrief and loss are universal experiences that everyone faces.The desire to return to 'normal' after loss is a common misconception...
2025-12-2618 min
Sit Around the Fire#030 Mr. Whiskey: From Navy Vet to Podcast PioneerThis conversation delves into the challenges faced by first responders and military personnel, particularly focusing on mental health issues, identity crises, and the importance of community and support. The discussion highlights the impact of societal pressures, the need for mentorship, and the critical role of human connection in suicide prevention. The speaker shares personal experiences and insights on navigating these complex issues, emphasizing hope and the potential for change.TakeawaysFirst responders often face mental health challenges due to their work environment.Identity can become intertwined with occupation, making transitions difficult.
2025-12-1646 minSit Around the Fire#029 The Weight of Joy: Navigating Holiday EmotionsSummaryIn this heartfelt holiday episode, Ashlea Dillard explores the complexities of joy and emotions during the holiday season. She emphasizes the weight of joy, the importance of receiving, and the power of self-acceptance. Ashlea encourages listeners to embrace their feelings, whether they are joyful or heavy, and to practice being present in the moment. The conversation highlights the significance of love, compassion, and the human experience, reminding us that it's okay to feel a range of emotions during this time of year.
2025-12-1432 min
Couple O' NukesWomen On The Front Lines: Firefighting, Trauma, and Transformation With Ashlea DillardSend us a textToday, I sit down with Ashlea Dillard to explore the realities of life as a firefighter and paramedic, the pressures placed on women in first responder roles, and the mental health battles that often remain hidden behind the uniform. Ms. Dillard begins by walking us through her unexpected path into firefighting after initially pursuing nursing. Once she stepped into fire culture, she discovered a tight-knit community defined by teamwork, problem-solving, and high-stakes decision-making. She shares stories from her early years on the ambulance, the transition to the firetruck, and the unique challenges she...
2025-12-131h 11
Perfect Life AwakeningAshlea Dillard – Compassion FatigueAir Date - 10 December 2025Ashlea Dillard is a retired firefighter–paramedic who spent years on the front lines, witnessing both the strength of the human spirit and the weight of human suffering. That experience shaped the way she practices today as a Licensed Professional Counselor and a Certified Clinical and Transpersonal Hypnotherapist. Her formal education includes both an undergraduate and master’s degrees in Mental Health and Clinical Counseling from Colorado Christian University—training that grounded her in a strong clinical foundation while supporting her heart-led, passionate approach to healing.#AshleaDillard #RoyceMorales #PerfectLifeAwakeningConnect with R...
2025-12-1156 min
Sit Around the Fire#028 Monica Tanner: Stop Going To Bed Angry? Maybe Sleep On ItSend us a textWhat if the problem isn’t your partner, but the pattern you’re both trapped in? Today we unpack the hidden scripts that drive your fights—attachment styles, nervous system triggers, and the “I’ll just fix it” reflex that keeps real repair out of reach—and share the small, repeatable moves that make your relationship feel safe again.Relationship coach and author Monica Tanner joins us to translate attachment theory into everyday language you can actually use. We talk about the anxious spiral that begs to solve everything before bed, the secure par...
2025-12-1044 min
Sit Around the Fire#027 Travis McGaha: Building Resilient First Responders Through Whole-Person WellnessSend us a textThe hardest part isn’t the fire. It’s carrying the weight after the sirens fade. We sit down with Travis McGaha—deputy fire marshal, founder of the North Carolina Firefighter Cancer Wellness Alliance, and host of the All Clear Podcast—to unpack a practical, whole-person path to resilience that goes far beyond gear and drills.Travis shares how cancer prevention opened the door to a wider view of firefighter wellness: mental fitness, cardiac risk, hormones, nutrition, and sleep. He walks us through the cultural shift from taboo to transparency on cancer...
2025-12-0558 min
Minutes with MangoHealing Trauma: Insights from a Former Firefighter with Ashlea DillardIn this interview, Ashlea Dillard shares her journey from being a firefighter paramedic to becoming a licensed professional counselor and hypnotherapist. She discusses her mission to end suffering and help others achieve liberation, which stems from her own experiences of suffering in silence while working in emergency services. Ashlea explains how her career in EMS exposed her to trauma and led her to seek personal growth and healing through education and therapy. She emphasizes the importance of self-care and mental health for first responders, highlighting the challenges they face, such as burnout and compassion fatigue.
Ashlea also...
2025-12-0237 min
Sit Around the Fire#026 William Person: Olympic Team USA Bobsled Athlete Healing CTESend us a textWhat if the fog, forgetfulness, and mood storms aren’t a failing mind—but an injured one that’s never been treated? We sit down with former Team USA bobsledder William Pearson to trace the slow, frightening slide into CTE symptoms—and the moment oxygen, pressure, and persistence turned the lights back on.William takes us inside the daily reality of brain trauma that hides in plain sight: random days of clarity, panic waking in unfamiliar rooms, losing track of time, and not recognizing familiar faces. He explains why micro concussions are so d...
2025-11-251h 06Sit Around the Fire#025 CELEBRATE! One Year Around The Fire...Send us a textThe crackle you hear isn’t just the intro—it’s a year of voices catching flame. We’re celebrating twelve months of honest conversations with flight nurses, paramedics, firefighters, spouses, mental health pros, and advocates who turned raw experience into practical wisdom. This anniversary brings back the moments that stuck: naming PTSD when a minor scare sparks a major reaction, watching compassion fatigue harden a caregiver’s voice, and choosing help even when secrecy feels safer.We revisit the foundation of this community—no one has to pretend they’re fine here—and...
2025-11-1957 min
Sit Around the Fire#023 Margaux Aime: From Grief To Grit: A Producer Rebuilds Purpose Through StorytellingSend us a textA simple mantra drives this conversation and the life behind it: keep it moving. Margot, the founder of True Self Films, shares how losing her grandmother, mother, and husband in three consecutive years forced a complete reset. Stoicism stopped working. Therapy, chosen intentionally without medication through a university program, became the bridge from paralysis to purposeful action. We walk through the moments that rebuilt her support system, from finding people who celebrate her wins to learning how to stagger asks so friends aren’t overwhelmed.From there, Margot flips the script on...
2025-11-1044 minSit Around the Fire#023: The 5 Non-NegotiablesSend us a textEver feel like you’re doing everything and still not moving forward? We break down the five non-negotiables that quietly determine whether life feels scattered or deeply aligned: spirituality, mental and emotional health, physical health, career and finances, and relationships. Rather than chasing hacks, we focus on clear priorities, practical routines, and beliefs that actually support growth.We start with spirituality as inner connection—no dogma, just simple practices to get quiet, breathe, and listen. A few minutes of morning and evening stillness, paired with time outside, can reset your nervous syst...
2025-11-0432 min
Doc Jacques: Your Addiction LifeguardCoping With BurnoutSend us a textWhat is it like to reach compassion fatigue and coping with it through addiction. Special guest Ashlea Dillard, retired Firefighter and now mental health counselor, as she discusses compassion fatigue and burnout with negative and faulty coping mechanisms. Her podcast is https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sit-around-the-fire/id1779172848Support the show
2025-11-0448 min
Sit Around the Fire#022: Jennifer Kaufman: Supporting Autism on the Front Lines: Tools, Tactics, and Trust for First Responders and FamiliesSend us a textSirens, bright lights, crowded scenes—now imagine all of that with a nervous system tuned to notice every sound and sensation at full volume. We sit down with school principal and trainer Jennifer Kaufman to unpack how autism can look like “defiance” or “intoxication” in the field—and why small, precise shifts from first responders can completely change the outcome.Jennifer shares a practical playbook for police, firefighters, EMS, and dispatch: trade “calm down” for literal, single-step instructions; build in longer pauses for processing; use one clear voice instead of a crowd; and keep...
2025-10-2849 min
Sit Around the Fire#021 Chef Calvin: From Texas BBQ to Plant-Powered: A Chef’s Journey to Fuel First RespondersSend us a textWhat if the best meal of the day also became the calmest moment of your week? We sit down with Chef Calvin—Texas-born, French-trained, and the mind behind R&D at Burger King and Arby’s—to talk about fueling first responders with fast, affordable, wildly flavorful meals that actually support long-term health. From pecan-smoked brisket memories to the science of perfect fries, he breaks down how to build big taste with simple systems that work in real kitchens under real pressure.Calvin shares a deeply personal turn: beating prostate cancer, confro...
2025-10-2056 minSit Around the Fire#020 You Don't Need to Wait Until You're Broken to Seek HelpSend us a textHave you ever caught yourself wondering if your problems are "big enough" to justify therapy? Or perhaps you've thought, "Other people have it worse" or "I just need to tough it out." You're not alone. Many of us operate with an invisible scale of suffering, waiting until we hit rock bottom before reaching out for help.This episode challenges that mindset completely. What if therapy isn't about waiting until you're broken, but instead functions more like routine maintenance? We take care of our cars with regular oil changes and our bodies...
2025-10-0837 min
Sit Around the Fire#019 Steve Orr: Warning Lights on the Dashboard: When Your Job Is Killing YouSend us a text"The greatest job in the world is actually destroying me." These powerful words capture the hidden struggle many first responders face behind their heroic image. In this raw, vulnerable conversation, former firefighter/paramedic Steve Orr bravely shares his 22-year journey through the fire service and the toll it took on his mental health.Steve opens up about the gradual onset of compassion fatigue and PTSD – how his nervous system became so dysregulated that even putting his son in pajamas felt like an emergency. He describes the warning signs he initially missed: un...
2025-09-241h 24
Sit Around the Fire#018 Stop Saying "You" and Start Saving Your RelationshipSend us a textWhat happens when a volcano comes home after shift? That's how one firefighter's spouse described living with a first responder - unpredictable eruptions following periods of concerning quiet. Communication becomes the lifeline that either saves or sinks these relationships.Drawing from real feedback from first responders with 25+ years of service, this episode dives into the unique communication challenges faced by emergency personnel and their partners. From the inability to empathize with "civilian problems" after witnessing trauma to the struggle of being present when exhausted, we unpack what makes these relationships particularly...
2025-09-0855 minSit Around the Fire#017 What's Running Your Life? Hint: It's Not Your Conscious ThoughtsSend us a textHave you ever wondered why you keep repeating the same patterns despite your best efforts to change? The answer lies deep within your mind's operating system – and it's more powerful than you might realize.Dive into the fascinating architecture of your mind as we explore the intricate relationship between the conscious mind, subconscious mind, and the critical factor. This episode reveals how these three components work together to shape virtually every aspect of your reality – from your automatic behaviors to your emotional responses and even your life outcomes.Your subc...
2025-08-2743 min
Sit Around the Fire#016 Egan de los Cobos: The Body Remembers, The Soul Responds: A Firefighter’s Journey Through PTSD, Transformation, & HealingSend us a textA devastating accident forever changed firefighter paramedic Egan De Los Cobos' life when a car plowed through a coffee shop patio where he sat with his three-year-old son. Though they survived physically, the psychological trauma triggered a cascade of mysterious health problems no doctor could explain. For years, Egan suffered silently with undiagnosed PTSD and progressively worsening autoimmune disease, afraid that seeking help might end his career.Egan shares the raw reality of what happens when trauma takes root in both mind and body. With remarkable candor, he details his journey...
2025-07-081h 13Sit Around the Fire#015 Beyond the Critical Factor: Can Ketamine Help You Access Hidden Healing?Send us a textHave you ever felt stuck despite trying "all the right things"? Talk therapy, medication, pushing through—and yet those same patterns keep emerging, those same wounds keep reopening. You're not alone, especially if you're a first responder.Ketamine-Assisted Psychotherapy (KAP) offers a fundamentally different approach to healing trauma and breaking through stubborn mental barriers. Unlike traditional therapies that work primarily with the conscious mind, ketamine temporarily bypasses what therapists call the "critical factor"—that internal gatekeeper that often rejects new perspectives about ourselves, especially healing ones.The science behind KAP...
2025-06-2833 min
Sit Around the Fire#014: Melissa Alvarez: Behind the Flame: A Firefighter's Wife SpeaksSend us a textWhat happens when the fire trucks leave the station and first responders head home? For the families left behind, a unique journey unfolds – one filled with both challenges and profound strength.Melissa opens her heart about life as a firefighter's wife and mother, revealing the emotional reality behind the scenes. "We are holding it down at home," she shares, fighting back tears as she describes the invisible load carried by first responder families. Having navigated this lifestyle for over a decade while raising young children, she offers wisdom that only experience ca...
2025-06-0957 minSit Around the Fire#013 The Costume Closet: False IdentitiesSend us a textWho are you when the uniform comes off? When the relationship ends? When the bank account empties? Today's powerful exploration challenges us to look beyond the external identities we cling to and discover our authentic selves.Many of us become deeply attached to our professional roles, introducing ourselves first by our job titles. I share my personal journey of identity crisis after leaving my firefighter paramedic career—how the admiration and status that came with the uniform became addictive, and how disorienting it felt when that identity fell away. This experience mi...
2025-05-0826 minSit Around the Fire#012: Addicted to Suffering: Choosing the Hell We KnowSend us a textWhy do we cling so tightly to the very things that cause us pain? It's a question that cuts to the heart of the human experience, and one that reveals a startling truth: we often become addicted to our own suffering. I share how we frequently choose "the hell we know over the heaven we don't" because our subconscious mind perceives familiar pain as safe, even when it's destroying us. This isn't about self-sabotage—it's about how our brains are wired for survival and predictability, even at the cost of our wel...
2025-03-2539 minSit Around the Fire#011 Stress & Fear: Beyond the JobSend us a textWhat if the root of your stress and anxiety could be addressed through understanding? In this enlightening episode, we tackle the complex interplay of stress and fear that many of us face daily. With staggering statistics revealing that 70% of Americans grapple with stress regularly, it is time to confront these feelings rather than allow them to control our lives.We dive deep into the science behind stress—distinguishing between acute and chronic forms and highlighting how they affect our mental well-being. Moreover, we reflect on the common stressors in our lives, fr...
2025-03-0350 minSit Around the Fire#010 Find Your Why, Change Your LifeSend us a textWhat drives first responders to keep going in the face of adversity? Join me, Ashlea, as we explore this profound question through the wisdom of Viktor Frankl, Martin Seligman, and Dr. Joe Dispenza. Discover how understanding our "why" can ignite passion and courage, transforming our roles and preventing burnout. These thinkers share insights into resilience and purpose, offering guidance on how to integrate our passions and talents into our professional lives, with empathy and strength leading the way.Embrace the full spectrum of happiness, from the simple pleasures in life to...
2025-02-1057 min
Sit Around the Fire#009 Pam Howes: Family, Flight, and Finding BalanceSend us a textPam's journey into emergency medical services started with an unplanned decision that blossomed into a nearly three-decade-long career. What began as a spontaneous leap into an EMT class has evolved into a remarkable life in EMS, from working with MedTrans Ambulance and Pride Mark Paramedics to soaring the skies as a flight nurse. Pam’s experiences offer a powerful narrative on the impact of small choices and the profound influence of family, as her own children pursue careers in service-oriented roles, inspired by their mother and father's dedication to community service.Ou...
2025-01-2752 min