Shows
Dynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 44 with Attorney Shelley Torvinen - "Some important do's and don'ts to help you succeed and avoid disaster."Minnesota Attorney Shelley Torvinen finally found us in the big city (Chicago) after a long drive to our virtual studio*. With a promise of hot chocolate and plenty of encouragement, we coaxed her from her car, walked her through our weed-strewn parking lot, and down the stairs past a creaky iron door, to a rusty office chair. We cleared away a pile of spiders and dust, gave her a seat at the table with us, and then applied our usual psychological pressure. In this Episode 44, recorded on March 12, 2025 by the light of a Coleman gas lant...2025-04-101h 06Dynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 43 with Carmen Quinones, an Attorney and a Guardian ad litem for childrenWe met with Attorney Carmen Quinones, from Wilmette (a suburb of Chicago.) She's fun to talk with. Parking her car in our weed-strewn parking lot and making it safely down the stairs to our drafty, underground virtual studio, Carmen brought a wealth of knowledge, kindness and good humor to our round-table discussion. She has uncounted years of experience, both as a psychology professional in Virginia and Illinois, and as an attorney for adults and children here in Chicago. In this Episode 43, recorded by flickering candlelight on October 23, 2024, with small creatures scurrying around on the floors and walls (it w...2024-11-1557 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 42 with Judge Mark Lopez, retiredIn this Episode 42 - recorded on May 8th, 2024, Marjie, Barry and Kevin host retired Judge Mark Lopez, formerly of the Cook County (IL) Circuit Court, Domestic Relations Division. In this wide-ranging discussion, Judge Lopez shares some insights and perspectives from his 22 years on the bench. Some topics are:Should you be scared to appear in Court?How are judges chosen in Cook County?What does a judge look at when deciding cases?Can you take off your shirt in Zoom court? (No.)Does it help to be loud and boisterous in Court?What is a 'pretrial?'When can you...2024-05-131h 02Dynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 41 with Attorney Igor Bozic - "Juvenile Court - a former prosecutor explains"In this Episode 41 - recorded on January 19, 2024, Marjie, Barry and Kevin sit down with former prosecutor ('Assistant State's Attorney') Igor Bozic to talk about Juvenile Court -- and the RISKS that parents face in not maintaining a calm, steady atmosphere around their children at home.How does the Illinois child-protection agency (DCFS) begin focusing on you and your family? Screaming, yelling, throwing things in the house. Being overheard by neighbors. Having your kids witness arguments between the adults. Teachers, social workers, counselors as 'mandated reporters' to DCFS. Police and their duty to contact DC...2024-01-3051 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 40 with Dr. Pascale Piron - "OVERthinking and UNDERthinking in family-law conflicts"In this Episode 40 - recorded on September 8, 2023, Marjie (our new co-host), Barry and Kevin sit down with: Doctor of Psychology Pascale Piron https://emergepg.com/pascale-piron, for a look behind the mental-health curtain. Psychologist, therapist, counselor -- what's difference (other than cost?) Can all of them do counseling? testing? evaluations? Why therapy for kids is good, and how some parents try to sabotage it. Why adults in litigation or family-law conflicts can greatly benefit from therapy. And what about parents' fears that seeing a therapist might give the other side reasons to claim the...2023-09-121h 07Dynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 39 - Answering some "Frequently Asked Questions"In this Episode 39 - recorded on July 20, 2023, Barry and Kevin answer some of the questions commonly asked of them by non-lawyers. There are links included below, including "Illinois Legal Aid Online," for people who would like some online help in preparing legal documents. While some of the questions and answers are specific to Cook County Circuit Court in Illinois, there are also some universal truths and principles that anyone should find useful, as they attempt to navigate a complicated court system. ==================Chicago Lawyers Barry C. Boykin and Kevin R. Johnson have more than 50 combined years of experience i...2023-08-071h 02Dynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 38 with Clare McMahon - "Best Ideas and Worst Ideas in Family Law"Back from a summer break, Barry and Kevin are again ready to ruminate and pontificate on the practice of family law. They are joined today by Chicago Attorney Clare McMahon from Hoffenberg & Block , who bravely wades into this wide-ranging discussion about the "Best Ideas and Worst Ideas in Family Law." In this Episode 38 - recorded in early December, 2022, Clare, Barry and Kevin gather around the (virtual) table to debate and explain some basic family-law concepts, as well as more-complicated techniques and battle-proven strategies. These three experienced attorneys pull out some tools from the fam...2022-12-141h 00Dynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 37 - "Drop Dead" and "Escape" clauses, Slippery, variable language and Other PerilsIn this Episode 37 - recorded on a hot day in June, 2022, Barry and Kevin discuss an insider's view of negotiating settlement agreements -- the kind that become divorce judgments, parenting-time orders, and custody ('allocation') judgments.When you receive a 20-page parenting-time proposal, what should you look for? How about "drop dead" ('self-executing') sentences and paragraphs -- which allow the other party to judge when an important line has been crossed (for example, failing to take the child to an athletic practice as scheduled) and now your rights and obligations instantly change (for example, you lose your Wednesday e...2022-07-0649 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 36 - The Aftermath of Court Orders (and the Before Math)In this Episode 36 - recorded in May, 2022, Barry and Kevin discuss what happens after a Divorce, Allocation Judgment or other Court Order has been entered. All that work, all the thinking and negotiating and planning -- so easy to fall apart or not work as planned.Kevin and Barry shares some stories and techniques for smoothing the way to the rest of your life -- your life after Court, when you have to live with the words on paper. ==================Chicago Lawyers Barry C. Boykin and Kevin R. Johnson have more than 50 combined years of experience...2022-06-1048 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 35 - Reviewing a year of podcasts in 2021 - guests, controversy, ideas and secrets2021 was a busy year for our podcast, with a multitude of guests sharing ideas, hopes, dreams, techniques and behind-the-scenes secrets from their real-world experience. A bunch of lawyers and one Doctor of Psychology, what could go wrong?In this Episode 35 - recorded in February, 2022 without a net, and without a guest, Barry and Kevin remember and summarize the hours and hours of 'Dynamite Divorce and Other Matters' episodes recorded in 2021. ==================Chicago Lawyers Barry C. Boykin and Kevin R. Johnson have more than 50 combined years of experience in Custody, Divorce and other Family Law matters...2022-03-0538 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 34 with Kara Bekelya - "Abuse, Domestic Violence, Truth, Lies, Divorce and Children""SEE THE LINKS BELOW!Safety and freedom. Who wouldn't want that? But abusive partners, spouses and other family members can put the safety and freedom of you and your children at risk. No one should live in constant fear of physical or emotional harm. Agencies, advocates and the legal system stand ready to help. On the other hand, no one should lose his or her home, children or freedom due to misuse of the legal system or false allegations of abuse. In this Episode 34, recorded on 12/9/2021, Barry...2021-12-3151 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 33 PART TWO with Attorney Mark Broaddus - "Guardianship, parents, children, disabilities, power and money"Parents. Children. Money. Power. Control. Disabled adults. What could go wrong? This podcast is about "Guardianship." It sounds like a blanket of comfort and protection. "Guardianship." The power to decide, for adults and children who can't. Protection against bad decisions and wasted assets sounds good! But having a guardian could mean the loss of control. Can you imagine having another person make your medical decisions, sell your house or spend your money? Who should have this awesome power?Sometimes, a guardianship clears up uncertainty. For example, when a single mother has mental or physi...2021-11-0431 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 33 PART ONE with Attorney Mark Broaddus - "Guardianship, parents, children, disabilities, power and money"Parents. Children. Money. Power. Control. Disabled adults. What could go wrong? This podcast is about "Guardianship." It sounds like a blanket of comfort and protection. "Guardianship." The power to decide, for adults and children who can't. Protection against bad decisions and wasted assets sounds good! But having a guardian could mean the loss of control. Can you imagine having another person make your medical decisions, sell your house or spend your money? Who should have this awesome power?Sometimes, a guardianship clears up uncertainty. For example, when a single mother has mental or physic...2021-11-0425 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 32 PART ONE with Michael Wood - Unpaid bills and family stress - 'Debt buyers' and the attacks on youOften added to the legal and emotional turmoil of a divorce, custody, parentage, child-support or other family-law dispute are pressures over unpaid bills and debts. Banks and other creditors sometimes try to collect for a while, but when they give up, they "charge off" the debt and sell it to a "debt buyer" for 3 or 4 cents on the dollar. Then, a semi-automated collection campaign can begin.In this Episode 32, parts One and Two, Recorded on 8/10/2021, Barry, Kevin and guest Michael Wood, an experienced Chicago consumer-law attorney, discuss:The clear-eyed (ruthless) way that ba...2021-08-2023 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 32 PART TWO with Michael Wood - Unpaid bills and family stress - 'Debt buyers' and the attacks on youOften added to the legal and emotional turmoil of a divorce, custody, parentage, child-support or other family-law dispute are pressures over unpaid bills and debts. Banks and other creditors sometimes try to collect for a while, but when they give up, they "charge off" the debt and sell it to a "debt buyer" for 3 or 4 cents on the dollar. Then, a semi-automated collection campaign can begin.In this Episode 32, parts One and Two, Recorded on 8/10/2021, Barry, Kevin and guest Michael Wood, an experienced Chicago consumer-law attorney, discuss:The clear-eyed (ruthless) way that ba...2021-08-2020 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 31 - PART TWO with Kathy Bojczuk - "Call the Parenting Coordinator! Our divorce is over, but my ex keeps fighting!""We fought over the divorce, but now that it's over, my ex won't stop fighting about our children! Never a moment's peace! It's always one thing or another -- my ex always looks for exceptions and loopholes in our parenting agreement, and I'm always having to defend my actions and my time with my child! " IS THERE NO END? After a highly-contested court case involving divorce, child-custody or parenting-time, the arguing and name-calling can continue unabated. There's seemingly no escape from the feuding, sniping and arguing over language, procedures, decisions, calendar dates and time schedules. Every w...2021-07-2921 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 31 - PART ONE with Kathy Bojczuk - "Call the Parenting Coordinator! Our divorce is over, but my ex keeps fighting!""We fought over the divorce, but now that it's over, my ex won't stop fighting about our children! Never a moment's peace! It's always one thing or another -- my ex always looks for exceptions and loopholes in our parenting agreement, and I'm always having to defend my actions and my time with my child! " IS THERE NO END? After a highly-contested court case involving divorce, child-custody or parenting-time, the arguing and name-calling can continue unabated. There's seemingly no escape from the feuding, sniping and arguing over language, procedures, decisions, calendar dates and time schedules. Every w...2021-07-2925 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 30 - PART TWO with Dr. Pascale Piron - "My mental health is fine! It's my ex who's unstable!" (Family law through the eyes of a mental health professional)This is terrible! First, I'm forced into a court battle for my child's future, now I have to be "evaluated" to see if I'm a good parent? OF COURSE I'm a good parent! It's my ex who's causing all the problems and lying about me! I hope the "professionals" will see that!In highly-contested child-custody and parenting-time cases, a judge will sometimes appoint a mental health professional to gather information and carefully sift through the conflicting and competing narratives and write a report. This is important stuff, since a professional's evaluation report can compl...2021-07-1324 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 30 - PART ONE with Dr. Pascale Piron - "I'm a loving and stable parent! It's my ex who's unstable!" (Family law through the eyes of a mental health professional)This is terrible! First, I'm forced into a court battle for my child's future, now I have to be "evaluated" to see if I'm a good parent? OF COURSE I'm a good parent! It's my ex who's causing all the problems and lying about me! I hope the "professionals" will see that!In highly-contested child-custody and parenting-time cases, a judge will sometimes appoint a mental health professional to gather information and carefully sift through the conflicting and competing narratives and write a report. This is important stuff, since a professional's evaluation repor...2021-07-1327 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 29 - PART TWO with Andrea Rice "Moving on after a custody or divorce case"I'm still having nightmares about my custody case! How can I get past this? How can I find peace and protect my kids from further trauma? Maybe I should share my inner feelings with my kids and lean on them for emotional support! (WHAT?!) In this Episode 29, PART TWO, Recorded on 6/4/2021,Barry, Kevin and special guest Andrea Rice share their intelligent and well-spoken (at least in their minds!) insights about how parties, partners and children can 'move on' after a divorce or custody case. Heal the scars, prevent further damage. Be the 'c...2021-06-1733 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 29 - PART ONE with Andrea Rice "Moving on after a custody or divorce case"I'm still having nightmares about my custody case! How can I get past this? How can I find peace and protect my kids from further trauma? Maybe I should share my inner feelings with my kids and lean on them for emotional support! (WHAT?!) In this Episode 29, PART ONE, Recorded on 6/4/2021,Barry, Kevin and special guest Andrea Rice share their intelligent and well-spoken (at least in their minds!) insights about how parties, partners and children can 'move on' after a divorce or custody case. Heal the scars, prevent further damage. Be the...2021-06-1730 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 28 - Part TWO - with guest Modupe Sobo - "The Judge appointed a lawyer for my little girl!" - Secrets of working with a G.A.L. or Child Rep.The Judge is giving my little son his own lawyer? But I'm his parent! I know him better than anyone! In this Episode 28, PART TWO, Recorded on 4/23/2021,Barry, Kevin and special guest Modupe Sobo share their battle-scarred war stories about the 'Guardians ad litem' and 'Child Representatives' that judges often appoint for children in hotly-contested custody and divorce cases. They are appointed to serve as the 'eyes and ears of the court.' What does that mean? Do I have to pay this new attorney?Should I be afraid for myself? For my c...2021-05-0427 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 28 - Part ONE - with guest Modupe Sobo - "The Judge appointed a lawyer for my little girl!" - Secrets of working with a G.A.L. or Child Rep.The Judge is giving my little son his own lawyer? But I'm his parent! I know him better than anyone! In this Episode 28, PART ONE, Recorded on 4/23/2021,Barry, Kevin and special guest Modupe Sobo share their battle-scarred war stories about the 'Guardians ad litem' and 'Child Representatives' that judges often appoint for children in hotly-contested custody and divorce cases. They are appointed to serve as the 'eyes and ears of the court.' What does that mean? Do I have to pay this new attorney?Should I be afraid for myself? For my c...2021-05-0432 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 27 - Part ONE - with guest Patrick Denkwa John - "Kids, we love you but we're breaking up"Custody! Divorce! Parenting time! Money! Disagreements over children! SEE THE LINKS BELOW!Tell the kids! Don't tell the kids! Hope they don't notice! In this Episode 27, PART ONE, Recorded on 3/5/2021, Kevin, Barry and special guest Patrick Denkwa John expound and explain a tricky, sensitive topic: How to talk to kids about their parents' breakup. Plane crash? Train wreck? Just a parting of the ways? It's tough to talk about!Do you tell your son or daughter that you're moving out? Do you explain the arguments t...2021-03-1127 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 27 - Part TWO - with guest Patrick Denkwa John - "Kids, we love you but we're breaking up"Custody! Divorce! Parenting time! Money! Disagreements over children! SEE THE LINKS BELOW!Tell the kids! Don't tell the kids! Hope they don't notice! In this Episode 27, PART TWO, Recorded on 3/5/2021,Kevin, Barry and special guest Patrick Denkwa John expound and explain a tricky, sensitive topic: How to talk to kids about their parents' breakup. Plane crash? Train wreck? Just a parting of the ways? It's tough to talk about!Do you tell your son or daughter that you're moving out? Do you explain the arguments t...2021-03-1125 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 26 - Part TWO - with guest Daniel Florey - "Refusing and Accusing" - When a child *is said to be* refusing visitationCustody! Divorce! Parenting time! Money! Disagreements over children! SEE THE LINKS BELOW!In this Episode 26, PART TWO, Recorded on 2/19/2021, Kevin, Barry and special guest Daniel J. Florey open up the box, spread the pieces on the floor, and attempt to solve a very-difficult puzzle -- one that often arises in custody and visitation disputes:What if the child is (reportedly or actually) refusing to spend time with the other parent?What if there's no evidence of danger?What if one parent is just tr...2021-02-2426 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 26 - Part ONE - with guest Daniel Florey - "Refusing and Accusing" - When a child *is said to be* refusing visitationCustody! Divorce! Parenting time! Money! Disagreements over children! SEE THE LINKS BELOW!In this Episode 26, PART ONE, Recorded on 2/19/2021, Kevin, Barry and special guest Daniel J. Florey open up the box, spread the pieces on the floor, and attempt to solve a very-difficult puzzle -- one that often arises in custody and visitation disputes:What if the child is (reportedly or actually) refusing to spend time with the other parent?What if there's no evidence of danger?What if one parent is just tr...2021-02-2430 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 25 - with guest Drew Curle - E-filing stress and hopeCustody! Divorce! Parenting time! Money! Disagreements over children! SEE THE LINKS BELOW!"E-filing" is short for 'electronic filing' of legal documents with the Cook County (Illinois) Clerk of Circuit Court. It's now required, unless you obtain a waiver. But there's hope: E-filing can be done from the comfort of home, with just a computer, an internet connection and a credit or debit card. IF you can figure it out!In this Episode 25, Recorded on 2/1/2021, Kevin, Barry and special guest Drew c...2021-02-0927 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 24 - Part ONE - with guest Marjie Nielsen - "Skeletons in the closet" - searching and using criminal informationCustody! Divorce! Parenting time! Money! Disagreements over children! SEE THE LINKS BELOW!Do you suspect that a person has been arrested? Convicted? Required to register as a sex offender or violent criminal? Is your ex's new boyfriend or girlfriend a risk to your children? How about this "nice" person you just met? Is there something more you should know? How about your past troubles? Are you destined to live with your mistakes forever?Did you know that a free website shows you names and pictures of everyone arrested in Chicago since January, 2014...2021-01-1629 minDynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)Episode 24 - Part TWO - with guest Marjie Nielsen - "Skeletons in the closet" - searching and using criminal informationCustody! Divorce! Parenting time! Money! Disagreements over children! SEE THE LINKS BELOW!Do you suspect that a person has been arrested? Convicted? Required to register as a sex offender or violent criminal? Is your ex's new boyfriend or girlfriend a risk to your children? How about this "nice" person you just met? Is there something more you should know? How about your past troubles? Are you destined to live with your mistakes forever?Did you know that a free website shows you names and pictures of everyone arrested in Chicago since January, 2014...2021-01-1627 min