Shows
Our Sh*t Podcast.David Bowie and the Barbed Wire Dyke.This week we're getting into our icks and there are lots of them. We kick things off with the big ones: posing with a fish (you know who you are), not wiping down gym equipment (criminal behaviour), and being rude to waiting staff (instant red flag, no further questions).But then we turn the microscope on ourselves. Yep, we're owning our own icks. The traits we hate to admit we have before stacking them up against an online list and discovering we're ticking off way more boxes than we'd like....
2026-03-0641 minOur Sh*t Podcast.How to disappoint a Genie: The Costco Edition.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we stumbled upon a magical lamp in Costco (as you do) and naturally had to discuss our ultimate three wishes. We kicked off with the ambitious plan of morphing into animals and landed on the ultimate heist because apparently we think we're Ocean's Eleven but with better fur. Then we got into the tech wishes: one of us wants to profit from it and to make people suffer and the other just wants flip phones and blurry videos. Both are concerning.Our millennial...
2026-03-0132 minOur Sh*t Podcast.The Tale of the Shitty Premier Inn Kettle.This week, we're bearing our souls and emptying our... other things. It's Confess Your Sins week on the Shit Podcast and true to form, things got messy fast. We're spilling our guts.. quite literally with a cavalcade of loo tales, personal (definitely not ours) anecdotes, and the kind of oversharing that would make your mum wince.We also dipped into the endless cesspool of human confession that is Reddit, because sometimes the internet's sins are just too good not to discuss. Plus, we have a very special story from a friend of a friend...
2026-02-2234 minOur Sh*t Podcast.The Chocolate Brioche Croissant GamesThis week on Our Shit Podcast, we're diving into the Winter Olympics but not in the way you'd expect. We propose a radical idea: stick a regular person next to every Olympian so we can truly appreciate just how superhuman these athletes are. Nothing says "wow, they're incredible" like watching Dave from accounting eat it on the slope.We also get into the wild story of the guy who publicly announced he'd been cheating on his girlfriend (bold strategy), debate the deeply questionable conspiracy theory about injecting acid into your penis for endurance purposes...
2026-02-1338 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Questions We should've Googled.This week, we're diving deep into the questions that keep us up at night from legitimate conspiracy theories to the completely unhinged. We're tackling the big ones like who really did 9/11 and the unsolved JonBenét Ramsey case, before careening into whether crabs think fish can fly and the mysterious disappearance of JFK's brain (seriously, where did it go?).As always, we go completely off the rails. Somehow we end up impersonating Stephen Hawking at Epstein Island and debating the logistics of time travel. We introduce our Urban Dictionary Word of the Week, and discover that Chloe has...
2026-02-0238 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Going Viral Without a ReflectionThis week we're asking the REAL questions: would you be a hot vampire or would you somehow fuck it up? Spoiler alert....Chloe would absolutely fuck it up. We give her 24 hypothetical hours with fangs and she spends them complaining about her teeth alignment and booking an orthodontist appointment for when she's human again. Priorities, babe.We're talking POWERS: flying (sick), eating people we hate (therapeutic), and whether we'd use our immortal abilities for good or evil. The answer? Depends on the vibe. Monday through Wednesday we're basically Batman. Thursday onward? Chaos incarnate.
2026-01-2535 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Death, Taxes and Takeaway Curry.We asked ourselves the big question this week: If you had one day left on earth, how would you spend it? Deep meditation? Heartfelt goodbyes? Nope. Turns out we'd mostly just faff about, max out every credit card we can get our hands on, and buy some absolutely rad motorcycles and cars we'll never have to pay for.This week we explore deeply hypothetical questions like "if we got poisoned from a deadly puffer fish meal and had 24 hours left to live, what would we do?" and whether, if it turned out we were...
2026-01-1830 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Truffle Butter.Welcome back to Our Shit Podcast, where millennial nostalgia meets absolute chaos! This week, we're exploring the phrases that defined a generation – and somehow still live rent-free in our heads.We're kicking things off with a deep dive into Urban Dictionary's hall of fame (or hall of shame?) with the legendary term "truffle butter." If you know, you know. If you don't... well, you're about to find out why some things can never be unlearned.From there, we do what we do best: quote literally every movie and cartoon fr...
2026-01-0936 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Rogered Beyond SalvationThis week on the podcast, we're shooting our shot with the big guy upstairs—except we've already accepted we're not getting through those pearly gates. Armed with our most unhinged questions for God, we somehow spiral from existential curiosities into... yeah, we spent way too long talking about pedophiles. (We don't know how we got here either, but here we are.)It's theological chaos meets millennial irreverence, and spoiler alert: we're definitely going to hell. But at least we'll have each other in the fire pit! Tune in for the kind of conversation that ma...
2026-01-0137 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Celebrating a Millennial Christmas with a Double Chin.This week we're unwrapping the gifts millennials actually want (money until we're dead, fake Crocs, Netflix lifetime subscriptions and noise-cancelling headphones to avoid human interaction) versus the ones we don't (robotic cat teddy bears that gave Lady M PTSD, and "Live Laugh Love" signs that should say "Live Love Fuck Off"). Chloe reveals she's never received cash as a gift (tragic), we defend our crew-cut sock choices as a desperate Gen Z cosplay, and Lady M confesses her Toffifee addiction before we spiral into post-Christmas weight gain shame. Plus: why we need...
2025-12-2639 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Coffee Grande.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're asking the important questions: which celebrities are secretly robots? Our investigation includes Danny DeVito, Tom Cruise, Simon Cowell, Stephen Hawking, Pedro Pascal, Bonnie Blue, and Steve Buscemi (we still can't pronounce it).We also dive into Epstein's island conspiracies, witness Chloe clapping without her hands in a moment of pure magic, debate whether Ariana Grande and her new girlfriend are possessed by demons or just need a good burger, discuss Erika Kirk milking her way through life, touch on P-Diddy's alleged diddling, and conclude that UFC is 100...
2025-12-1430 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Cart Rage and Corporate Lies: Unpopular Opinions (Part 2)Welcome back to the chaos. This week: why isn't sauce a drink? Spicy mayo smoothie, anyone? Camping is just for attention-seekers—stay home, and if someone suggests it for a second date, RUN. Your trauma doesn't excuse being a twat but we DO use ours for content. Somehow this led to loving Phil Collins???We declared speakerphone calls in public are free entertainment, wine is just lying to ourselves (vodka supremacy), and Lady M GOES OFF about people filming gigs—fuck your phone. We hate people. We talked about nuts on planes, bear attacks, wank...
2025-12-0732 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Bring Back Pirate BayThis week on our shit podcast, we tackled unpopular opinions that might get us cancelled. Chloe is disgusted by cold leftovers (apparently they taste better cold? Yuck). Lady M went on a rant about those disappointing sugar waffles—utterly disgusted doesn't even cover it.Then we got into the real controversy: downloading films illegally was easier than streaming now. Fuck you Netflix, we want Pirate Bay back! Bring back waiting 10 hours for a dodgy film download.Millennial hot take: side partings > middle partings. Sorry Gen Z, you're wrong.Lady M dropped her most unhi...
2025-11-2334 minOur Sh*t Podcast.4 Fingers in a Wetherspoons with a Tiny Spoon.This week: FOOD CRIMES!Ditch that necrophilia podcast and join us for chaos. We debate spaghetti bolognese etiquette (fine at home, criminal in restaurants—unless it's Wetherspoons where we might eat with a fork between our toes). Ketchup on roasts? Acceptable WITH gravy. Lady M's husband lives in a basement AND she eats cereal with WATER. Who hurt you, Lady M? Chloe can't afford a 4-finger KitKat (it's going on her birthday list). We discuss KitKat eating methods, crisps in sandwiches (acceptable), well-done steak (DO NOT CREMATE YOUR STEAK—we've added this to o...
2025-11-1532 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Shitty Questions, Get Shitty Answers.In this gloriously unhinged episode, this week we're answering agony aunt questions - starting with the burning question on everyone's lips: who IS Lady M? After solving that mystery, we answer our listeners' most deranged questions. We discuss the moral implications of stealing cats, the culinary possibilities of eating cats, launching a coffee maker through a widow (the person? the window? who knows), peacocking around town in a soft top car, and the logistics of becoming a vampire - because apparently, no question is too unhinged for us.We also unveil our groundbreaking theory that crying is...
2025-11-0731 minOur Sh*t Podcast.We Solved Nothing: A Halloween Mystery Spectacular.Welcome back, mystery lovers! After a three-week hiatus, we're diving headfirst into our Halloween special: Unsolved Mysteries Edition.We kick things off with a cruise ship disappearance that we've confidently solved as sex trafficking. Chloe bravely volunteers herself as tribute (but only in tropical locations), while Lady M—built like a tiny bodybuilder as a child—would have simply punched her way to freedom.After a brief detour into Halloween's origins and why giraffe carcasses are peak costume material, we tackle three genuinely unsolved mysteries:Mystery #1: Boys find...
2025-11-0342 minOur Sh*t Podcast.The Mosquito's Happy Hour.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're diving into funny facts that are supposedly true (emphasis on supposedly). Spoiler alert: our fact-checking is questionable at best.We kick off with some delightful diarrhea truths that naturally spiral into conversations about shitting yourself and enemas. Because that's just where our brains go. Then we tackle relationship facts, traffic light waiting statistics that one of us loves and the other absolutely despises, and the great Pringles guy mystery - was he buried in a full-size 6-foot Pringles can or just his ashes in a regular crisp...
2025-10-0530 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Glitter, Hoarders & Rapture Pet Sitters: A Masterclass in Bad Ideas.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're unleashing our inner entrepreneurs with business ideas so brilliant, we're surprised we're not millionaires yet. There's a reason we're not.We kick off with our genius plan for a pet-sitting service specifically for the rapture - because someone needs to look after Fluffy when the chosen ones ascend to heaven. It's a niche market, but we're cornering it.Lady M gets excited about her specialty: glitter cards that explode on opening. Nothing says "I hate you" quite like covering someone's entire house...
2025-09-2637 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Mr Moshi Yakusami & The Fire Door of Doom.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're diving into horror films and quickly discover that Chloe knows absolutely nothing about them while Lady M has apparently seen every scary movie ever made. It's like pairing a horror encyclopedia with someone who thinks Casper is terrifying.We tackle the big question: would we actually leave a haunted house? Turns out it depends entirely on the housing market and whether we've had a good night's sleep. Priorities, people.Things get weird when we discuss listening to Britney Spears and being called...
2025-09-1935 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Moistly TraumatisedThis week on Our Shit Podcast, we're diving into the classic lies our parents told us as kids - you know, all those ridiculous myths that somehow convinced an entire generation of children.We start with the greatest hits: sitting too close to the TV will make your eyes go crossed (spoiler: total bollocks), and how turning on the interior car light will apparently cause a fatal accident. Because nothing says "safety first" like your dad screaming about dome lights.Then we get into the food lies: eating carrots...
2025-09-1331 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Can I Double Dip, or Should We Swap Saliva First?This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're tackling the unwritten rules of society - you know, all those things that somehow everyone's supposed to know but nobody actually taught us.We dive into the complex etiquette of petting other people's dogs and the awkward small talk that follows with random dog owners. Can I pet that dawgggg? Then we get into the proper grim stuff: people who don't flush public toilets (why are you like this?), mouth-breathers who chew with their gob wide open, and those absolute savages who...
2025-09-0734 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Getting Probed is just a free Colonoscopy, right?This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're going full tinfoil hat (Lady M special) as we dive deep into alien conspiracy theories and extraterrestrial encounters. We start by discussing how aliens are definitely real and already living among us, disguised as humans (we're looking at you, suspicious neighbour). Then we pitch Area 51 as the ultimate holiday destination - forget Center Parcs, we want that alien technology tour package.Our brilliant plan involves appointing Dolly Parton as Earth's official spokesperson because honestly, who better to represent humanity? We also get...
2025-09-0132 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Would You Rather? Rather Not Know Our Answers.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're playing "Would You Rather?" with the most ridiculous scenarios imaginable.We start with the classics: permanently wet socks or constantly feeling like you have popcorn stuck in your teeth? Welcome to sensory hell. Then comes sweating maple syrup versus sneezing glitter, which somehow triggers Chloe's random Michael Bisping story because that's how her brain works.Things escalate when we debate fighting one horse-sized duck or a hundred karate-trained duck-sized horses. This spiraled into creating a business plan for supplying oversized poultry to...
2025-08-2528 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Cannibalism, Spice Girls & Punching Mammals: A Moral Dilemma.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're putting ourselves through the moral and philosophical wringer with some absolutely unhinged hypothetical scenarios. Buckle up, it gets dark!We dive straight into the deep end with five questions that nobody asked for but we're answering anyway. First up: would we resort to cannibalism on a stranded island with only a 25% chance of rescue? Because apparently we needed to know where we stand on eating each other.Then we tackle the classic drowning dilemma - old lady or baby, you can only...
2025-08-1827 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Red Flag Week: From Reddit to Red Onions.Welcome to Red Flag Week on Our Shit Podcast, where we're waving more flags than a communist parade! This week we dive into the big icks and red flags that make us want to swipe left on humanity.Starting with guys who think we care about their fantasy football obsession - lads, your made-up team's performance isn't exactly riveting conversation over dinner. Then we get into the hygiene horrors - people who think their legs are magically self-cleaning during showers and the absolute chaos of restaurant forks that have been through thousands of mouths.
2025-08-1122 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Ain't No Party Like a Bukake Party.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're talking about things we don't discuss enough and why we actually did them. Welcome to our shame spiral!We start with the classics: hoarding receipts for expired frozen lasagnes, mourning cargo trousers with multiple pockets despite having nothing to put in them, and destroying the family PC downloading "totally legitimate" Limewire files. RIP to all the computers we murdered for free music.Then comes fashion trauma: the tragic loss of low-rise jeans and our millennial crisis of dressing like we have an...
2025-07-3131 minOur Sh*t Podcast.With a Massive Schlong, What Could Go Wrong in a Zombie Apocalypse?This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're planning for the inevitable zombie apocalypse because apparently we think we'd survive longer than five minutes.We dove deep into survival strategies, discussed plans for the first 72 hours, debated the different types of zombies (fast vs slow, smart vs stupid), and honestly assessed our completely useless skill sets for the post-apocalyptic world. One of us isn't going to make it. But naturally, we found ways to monetise the apocalypse. We discussed fighting zombies for profit (because capitalism never dies), the booming market...
2025-07-2627 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Cheese Wheels, Moats, and Methtaurant: A Guide to Terrible Financial Decisions.On this week's episode, we dive deep into the stupidest possible ways to blow a fortune, and honestly, we're kind of impressed with ourselves. (Lady M even made notes)Join us as we plan our financial suicide with a cheese wheel the size of a car, a house surrounded by a legitimate moat/lazy river (old man vibes, obviously), and our crown jewel - a restaurant that serves nothing but meth (the "Methtaurant," patent pending). We're talking exotic animals we have no business owning and a hotel staffed entirely by drama llamas.
2025-07-1927 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Haunting You Mid-Wank: My Horror Movie Universe Debut.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're ditching reality to debate which movie universes we'd want to live in and which ones would turn us into immediate casualties.We start sensibly enough: superheroes, wizards, or sci-fi adventures? Then we spiral into the horror movie universes that would have us dead within minutes because let's face it, we're not main character material.But obviously we can't stay on topic for five minutes. We got deep into the ergonomics of being a ghost - do you waste your haunting powers trolling...
2025-07-1125 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Is It Rude or Am I just British?This week on Our Shit Podcast, get ready for a proper moan-fest as we dive into our biggest pet hates - personal, generational and national.We start with the classics: public displays of affection that make us physically ill, the absolute travesty of thin-cut toast (where's the substance?!), and the ultimate millennial fear of answering the phone. Because apparently we'd rather die than have an unscheduled conversation.We explore how different generations get wound up by completely different things, and somehow manage to sound like we're 80 years old despite...
2025-07-0624 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Don't Open the Letter: A Millennial's Guide to Avoiding War.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we've solved World War 3! You're welcome, humanity.We discussed what we'd do if WW3 kicked off and somehow convinced ourselves we'd be essential military assets. Spoiler alert: we absolutely would not be. We debated our ideal draft roles, from fighting alongside Beyoncé on the front line to Lady M's uncanny resemblance to Jack Reacher making her perfect for covert ops.Key tactical discussions: looking fabulous in camo, the optimal battle playlist (Call Me Maybe vs It's Britney Bitch), and our revolutionary conflict resolution m...
2025-06-3024 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Tug on Teams : A Corporate Thriller.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're diving into our most irrational fears and unhinged intrusive thoughts that pop up at the worst moments.From "what if I die naked?" to being convinced there's a shark in the swimming pool or snake in the toilet (apparently we think we live in Australia), we cover the classics. Then we explore those pesky intrusive thoughts like wanting to lie down in the supermarket, hitting the wrong pedal while driving, or just... throwing a shoe into a crowd. Normal Tuesday thoughts, right?...
2025-06-2229 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Killing Baby Hitler and Other Time Travel Etiquette.This week on Our Shit Podcast, we're tackling the big questions: What superpower would you choose, and what would you do with a one-time trip back through history?First up: superpowers! From mind reading (for totally innocent purposes, we swear) to flying (because who has time for traffic?), we break down various superhuman abilities with some seriously questionable reasoning. Spoiler alert: our motivations might be more selfish than heroic.Then we hop in our hypothetical time machine for some armchair history editing. We explore everything from personal do-overs to, uh, more dramatic...
2025-06-1423 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Aches and Pains and Olympic games.In this week's episode, we deep-dive into our achy bodies and our delusional Olympic aspirations. Because apparently we think we're athletes now?We got a little carried away discussing which Olympic events we could totally dominate (spoiler: very few) and totally made up a couple of new ones like fighting dwarfs. Yes, that's a real conversation we had. Fair warning: Contains talk about colonoscopies, questionable body assessments, and one of us at the grand age of 30 doesn't know what a chocolate starfish is. The innocence was beautiful while it lasted...
2025-06-0625 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Will the World end when my printer works?Just when you thought being a millennial couldn't get any worse - enter the robots. In episode 2, we dive headfirst into our inevitable robot-dominated future and why. It's packed with hypothetical scenarios, millennial anxiety, and enough nonsense to make you question everything. Fair warning: this episode contains zero actual expertise and maximum speculation. We hope you enjoy our descent into robot-induced madness.P.S. - Any robots listening to this, we're totally cool with you. Please don't remember this when you take over.
2025-05-3024 minOur Sh*t Podcast.Let's not start with Avril Lavigne!Welcome to our very first episode of Our Shit Podcast.This inaugural episode is admittedly a bit all over the place—think of it as organised chaos. We're still finding our groove, so you'll catch us free-balling through conversations about everything and nothing, probably oversharing, and definitely making it up as we go along.Consider this your official invitation to join two people who have their shit together just enough to hit record, but not enough to have a proper outline. We promise it gets better (or at least more coherent), but honestly, the messy au...
2025-05-2725 min