Shows
The Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossLet's Chat... Where does the love go when someone dies (with David Kelly)#131. Let's chat... about where the love goes when someone dies. Can you still be 'in love' if it's not reciprocated? Does it eventually fade? Or die?Welcome to another Let’s Chat episode, where instead of continuing our 101 Types of Loss list, I (Claire Sandys) sit down with guests who have expertise and personal insight into different aspects of loss.In this episode, I have the pleasure of talking with David Kelly from Hertfordshire, who works as a Community Engagement Coordinator at Rennie Grove Peace Hospice Care.David reached out after a previous co...2025-06-241h 19The Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossChris & Claire's top takeaways from 20 years of marriage#129. What are the most valuable things we've learnt - or think really matter - after 20 years of marriage?This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around grief, exploring asking if hope can be found in 101 different types of permanent loss.On 26 May 2025, we celebrated 20 years of marriage! It's a big deal for us as we love being married and find we don't have that much to celebrate in life! So we decided to sit down and discuss what we've learnt over the past two decades, and share what...2025-05-271h 15The Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossLoss 62/101: Loss through menopause: Diane Danzebrink#127. Think menopause is just a physical change?What if we told you it can also bring grief, loss of identity, and a hit to your mental health?This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around grief, exploring asking if hope can be found in 101 different types of permanent loss.Loss #62 of 101: Loss through menopauseIn this episode, we welcome Diane Danzebrink, advocate, educator, and author of Making Menopause Matter. Diane experienced surgical menopause following surgery related to a potential ovarian cancer diagnosis in 2012. W...2025-04-291h 16The Silent Why: finding hope in grief and loss101 LOSS COUNTDOWN: 60 down, 41 to go#123. Can hope be found in 101 different types of loss? We're well on our way to finding out, as we reach another milestone! We've hit loss number 60 on our mission to explore 101 different types of permanent loss, meaning we only have 41 (!) to go. Now over halfway to our goal.In this episode, we (Chris & Claire Sandys) pause briefly to discuss life in general (something new we thought we'd try!), the last batch of losses (51-60), and what nuggets of wisdom we've taken from each guest.We're loving every second of talking to ot...2025-03-041h 07The Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossChris & Claire's Reflections on Christmas & New Year#120. Well, after our 'looking ahead to Christmas' episode, how did it go? Were our festive hearts filled with joy? Or were there tears?!This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around grief, to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss, and we're Chris & Claire Sandys, your childless hosts.Every year, we dedicate an episode to sharing our thoughts and feelings about the Christmas season - before, and after, it happens. Now that the holiday buzz has settled and a new year has begun, we’re...2025-01-2148 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossChris & Claire's Chatty Christmas Catch-Up#118. Struggling with the festive season? You're not alone. As a childless couple, we've been there too, especially when family is at the heart of so many celebrations. This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around grief, to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss, and we're Chris & Claire Sandys, your childless hosts.Every year we release an episode where we chat about how we're feeling about Christmas. We started with an episode in 2021, talking about how hard it felt and Chris' loss of Christmas...2024-12-2354 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossGraveyard Musings: Moorslede, Belgium#108. I've always loved graveyards. I'm not sure what it is about them that draws me in, but a little while ago I decided to record my musings as I wander round them.So that's what these Graveyard Musing episodes are, just me and my phone, in a graveyard. And sometimes I go international (like this one) and sometimes Chris joins me (like this one).Anyway, welcome to another Graveyard Musing from me, Claire Sandys (host of The Silent Why podcast).In this musing, Chris (husband) and I are wandering around Moorslede Communal Cemetery...2024-07-0933 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossLoss 52/101: Loss of life for a cardiac surgeon: Mark Field#104. What's it like to handle a human heart? Or to operate in that small space between life and death? And is there grief for a surgeon when a patient dies during, or after, surgery? This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around grief, to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss.Loss #52 of 101: Loss of a life for a heart surgeon Meet Mark Field, a cardiac surgeon from Liverpool (in the north of England) who joined me (Claire), in-between commitments at work...2024-05-141h 05The Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossLoss 51/101: Loss of a dad ('that I don't know if I loved'): Thea Rickard#103. When a close family member dies, like a parent, it's easy to assume there was love there, but what if you're not sure if you loved that person, or even if they loved you, what does grief look like then?This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around grief, to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss.Loss #51 of 101: Loss of a dad ('that I don't know if I loved') And yes, this means that as we've reached Loss 51 - we're officially...2024-04-3046 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossGraveyard Musings: Llanfair Talhaiarn, Wales#102. I've always loved graveyards. I'm not sure what it is about them that draws me in, but a little while ago I decided to record my musings as I wander round them. So that's what these Graveyard Musing episodes are, just me and my phone, in a graveyard (and sometimes Chris!).Welcome to another Graveyard Musing from me, Claire Sandys (host of The Silent Why podcast). In this musing, Chris (husband) and I are wandering around Llanfair Talhaiarn Cemetery in North Wales.Come with us to hear the sounds of the Welsh countryside (a...2024-04-1615 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and loss101 LOSS COUNTDOWN: 50 down, 51 to go#101. Another milestone reached! We've hit loss number 50 on our mission to explore 101 different types, meaning we only have 51 (!) to go. So we're just half an episode away from being halfway through all 101! In this episode we (Chris & Claire Sandys) pause briefly to discuss the last batch of losses, 41-50, and what nuggets of wisdom we've taken from each guest. We're loving every second of talking to others on this podcast, but we're also learning a lot about healthy ways to process our own grief, whether childlessness, pets, relatives, friends, health, or even just the day-to-day l...2024-04-0245 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossNavigating Mother's Day when you're childless... again.#099. Here it is again - Mother's Day.As many mum's across the UK will be glowing with pride at the presents their children offer, other women will be wincing a little (or a lot) every time they see these words. Well, as a childless-not-by-choice (cnbc) woman I know how they feel, and I'm here to share how I'm learning to mark it without letting it mark me.This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around loss and grief and to see if hope can be found in 101 different...2024-03-0942 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossNew Year, New... Herman!#096. It's not just Christmas that can be a tough, heading into a New Year can be tricky too. And this year, even though we were very intentional about navigating a childless Christmas (and it went well), we hit New Year and for some reason the wheels fell off the apple cart!We're Claire and Chris Sandys, hosts of The Silent Why podcast, lovers of deep conversation, building community and marzipan (that's mostly Claire).We're also childless (not by choice) which adds a layer of discomfort to some of the popular family times of the year...2024-01-0945 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossComfort on Christmas Day#090. Christmas can be a tough time, right?If your response is 'absolutely not' then this festive episode might not be for you. But if you sense a sad little 'yeah it is' voice deep within, then we're hoping this opportunity to hear from a mix of our previous (and future) podcast guests might bring you some comfort.We're Claire and Chris Sandys, hosts of The Silent Why podcast, lovers of deep conversation, building community and marzipan (that's mostly Claire).We're also childless (not by choice) which adds a layer of discomfort to this...2023-12-2514 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossChris & Claire chat Christmas and Childlessness#089. Christmas can be hard, and we've experienced that ourselves as a childless couple, especially at a time of year when family seems to be at the heart of most festivities. This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around grief, to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss, and we're Chris & Claire Sandys, your childless hosts.Every year we put out an episode where we chat about how we're feeling about Christmas. We started with an episode in 2021, talking about how hard it felt and...2023-12-191h 00The Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossWhat's on the podcast this Christmas and New Year?Find Christmas tough? We're here for you.This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around grief, to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss.Some hosts put out less podcast episodes over Christmas, but not me, I'm going for more!In this episode I (Claire Sandys, host) am going to give you an idea of previous Christmas and New Year content you might want to listen and give you a run down of what to expect from us this year over Christmas...2023-12-1207 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossLet's Chat... Funeral Directing (with Adrianne Hickey)#087. Let's Chat... setting up your own funeral business, personalising funerals, and everything funeral directing. In these Let’s Chat episodes, I (Claire Sandys) chat one-to-one with a guest who has experience/expertise in a particular area of loss.In this episode I’m chatting to Adrianne Hickey, a Funeral Director in North Wales. I met Adi on our trip to North Wales to get some work experience at a funeral directors. She took the brave step of starting her own Funeral Business with no prior experience. I was very curious to hear about what...2023-11-2140 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossBLOG: My Why: Seeing my first dead bodyHave you ever seen a dead body? I hadn't, until just a few weeks ago. Welcome to another My Why blog from me, Claire Sandys, co-host of The Silent Why podcast.My Why episodes are audio versions of my latest blog post. If you'd prefer to read it, you can find it here: https://www.thesilentwhy.com/post/seeingmyfirstdeadbodyA few weeks ago I did some work experience at a Funeral Directors. One of my many reasons was to get up close and personal with death. Why? Well hosting a podcast...2023-07-2522 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossWales, work experience, bitey flies, chips and Dave#077. In this episode, we (Chris & Claire) talk about our one-week break from the podcast recently and what we were up to - and it involved everything from fish to funerals, bodies to bitey flies!Welcome back to The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around loss and grief and see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss.For Loss 41/101 (Loss of life for a Funeral Director) we interviewed two Funeral Directors and this got me (Claire) thinking. Having never seen a dead body or been around death...2023-06-2727 min
As Long As I'm LivingHear from the Pros! (We're On a Break)We're on our break, but here's some episodes to listen to this week instead!
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As Long As I'm Living: Hear From the Pros!
Empty Arms, an Interview with Carol McMurrich
SIDS, an Interview with Dr. Goldstein of the Roberts Program
Parental Grief, an Interview with Dr. Goldstein of the Roberts Program
All About EMDR, an Interview with Trauma Therapist Rebecca Munini
Grief Needs a Witness, an Interview with Dr. Denise Mandel
There Are No Silver Linings, an Interview with Dr. Denise Mandel
2023-04-1008 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossLoss 43/101: Loss of life for a Funeral Director: Jonathen Harty and Chris Lord-Brown#069. Where there's loss of human life, one person will often be found in the background - the funeral director. They quietly go about their business with discretion and dignity, engaging with families to provide support and care in their greatest time of need. But how do they personally shoulder the burden of working with loss every single day? This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around loss and grief and see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss.Loss #43 of 101 - Loss of life for a...2023-03-281h 02The Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossNavigating Mother's Day when you're childless#68. Many mum's across the UK are likely still glowing after a day of being celebrated, but maybe for you Mother's Day (or Mothering Sunday, to use the proper name) makes you wince a little (or a lot). Well, as a childless-not-by-choice (cnbc) woman I know how you feel, and I'm here to share how I'm learning to mark it without letting it mark me.This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around loss and grief and to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss....2023-03-2140 minAs Long As I'm LivingBonus! Our Worst Episode EverWe thankfully had time to record a real episode for you later in the week, but this was our first attempt at this week's episode. It's BAD!!! Alina was sick and recording from bed, and for some reason both of our brains were not connected to our mouths. We're releasing this in case anyone needs a laugh, but we are fully aware this is our worst episode ever. If you want to listen to some better produced podcasts, take a look at our recommendations below!
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As Long As I'm Living podcast recommendations!
1. Terrible...2023-02-0212 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and loss101 LOSS COUNTDOWN: 40 down, 61 to go#064. Another milestone reached! We've hit loss number 40 on our mission to explore 101 different types, meaning we only have 61 (!) to go.In this episode we (Chris & Claire Sandys) pause briefly to discuss what we've learned so far on this journey. What are the takeaways? What has encouraged us? What will we try in the future? What's most memorable about the last 10 losses we've explored?We're loving every second of talking to others on this podcast, but we're also learning a lot about healthy ways to process our own childlessness grief.And because we ask e...2023-01-3148 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossAnother new year? Why?!!#061. Dislike New Year's Eve? Don't get it? Don't want to be a part of it? Hate it even?!Well allow us to show you how you can turn it from foe into friend.This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around loss and grief and to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss.We (Claire & Chris) know New Year is hard and disliked by a lot of people, but as it's technically only a calendar change we also know a lot of...2022-12-3117 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and loss'Help me find what I need!'The Silent Why podcast is on a mission to seek hope in 101 different types of permanent loss. We (your hosts, Claire and Chris Sandys) also love a good spin-off. In this short episode Claire helps you find what you need.Links to episodes/blogs mentioned...Episode 13 - ‘That weird time between loss of an old year and the start of a new year’. (Chris & I chat about that weird time between Christmas and New Year): https://www.thesilentwhy.com/podcast/episode/4be504ec/that-weird-time-between-loss-of-an-old-year-and-start-of-a-new-year My Why: Christmas - friend or foe...2022-12-2708 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossFinding comfort at Christmas#060. Christmas can be a tough time, right? If your answer is 'absolutely not' then this festive special might not be for you. But if you feel a sad little 'yeah it is' voice inside, then come with us as we chat through why some find it hard and how we can find - and share - comfort through it.We're Claire and Chris Sandys, hosts of The Silent Why podcast, lovers of deep conversation, building community and marzipan. We're also childless (not by choice) which adds a layer of discomfort to this special...2022-12-2341 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossPODCAST UPDATE: The Why Silent?*Announcement Episode* This is just a short hello to let you know we are having a three-week break from releasing episodes as normal. We wanted to offer a short explanation, so this mini episode explains why The Silent Why won't appear in your feed until the beginning of December 2022.Out of the two of us, Claire carries the bulk of the load with the mission to explore 101 different types of loss, and producing two episodes a week demands a lot of time, effort, energy and emotion. While we love it, we don't want this to d...2022-11-0803 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossLoss 35/101: Loss of photos: Chris & Claire Sandys#053. We've all done it haven't we? Lost, damaged or deleted important photos and videos with absolutely no way of retrieving them. There's that sinking feeling followed by a knot in your stomach as you realise what just happened. Loss #35 of 101 - Loss of photosThis is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around loss and grief and to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss.This week, we (your hosts, Chris & Claire Sandys) are back to share a personal loss we went through l...2022-10-1131 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossA funeral observed: Chris & Claire Sandys#050. For this special episode we (your hosts, Chris & Claire) shared some thoughts and reflections while watching the live televised state funeral of Queen Elizabeth II at Westminster Abbey in London (a mere few hours drive from where we live in England). For this episode there's no script, no editing of what we say (partly because there's music in the background a lot and that makes it nearly impossible!), no prior discussion, just us pressing record on our phones when we had something to share or capture.Following 10 days of national mourning in the UK and 4 d...2022-09-2032 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossLoss 33/101: Loss of a Queen: Chris & Claire Sandys (and friends)#049. Reflections on, and tributes to, our longest-reigning monarch, Queen Elizabeth II, after the announcement of her death three days ago.Elizabeth Alexandra May Windsor21.04.1926 - 08.09.2022We never considered that in the short time we'd be exploring 101 losses, we'd need to hastily prepare an episode on the loss of our Queen. Yet here we are.Loss #33 of 101.At 7pm on Thursday 8 September 2022 the UK was stunned by a statement from 'His Majesty the King'. Just 30 minutes earlier, news had officially been shared that HM the Queen had died.2022-09-131h 09The Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossBLOG: My Why: A Sky Full of Scars by Coldplay (& Claire)Last Saturday (20 August 2022) Chris and I went to see Coldplay at Wembley Stadium in London, part of their Music of the Spheres World Tour. It was an amazing experience. Welcome to another My Why from Claire Sandys, co-host of The Silent Why podcast. My Why episodes are weekly audio shorts of my latest blog post. If you'd prefer to read it, you can find it here: thesilentwhy.com/post/askyfullofscarsWatching some people being interviewed about their favourite Coldplay songs on social media, before seeing them perform, I realised how many people connect wi...2022-08-2607 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and loss101 LOSS COUNTDOWN: 30 down, 71 to go#044. Another milestone reached! We've hit loss number 30 on our mission to explore 101 different types, meaning we only have 71 (!) to go.In this episode we (Chris & Claire Sandys) pause briefly to discuss what we've learned so far on this journey. What are the takeaways? What has encouraged us? What will we try in the future? What's most memorable about the last 10 losses we've explored?We're loving every second of talking to others on this podcast, but we're also learning a lot about healthy ways to process our own childlessness grief.And because we ask e...2022-08-0940 min
Hey Chaplain: The Police Wellness PodcastThe Silent Why Interviews Jared Altic - Bonus Ep 10Text a Message to the ShowIn this special bonus episode, you will hear an interview I did this year with a podcaster from the UK. This is NOT a paid advertisement of any kind, rather it is an episode worth hearing from a podcast that I believe is worth your time. The next voice you hear will be Claire Sandys from the silent Why podcast, which is a fantastic show about different kinds of grief and loss. Everyone will suffer a loss of some sort, sooner or later, and The Silent Why is easily th...2022-07-2542 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossMy Why: Catch-up, cancer, chemo and eyebrows with Katie Joy DukeI wanted to have another chat with Katie after her diagnosis with breast cancer, to find out about the losses attached to a diagnosis like this, and how they differed from the loss of her daughter.Welcome to another My Why from me, Claire Sandys, co-host of The Silent Why podcast. My Why episodes are weekly audio shorts of my latest blog post, but this one is a bit different as I'm using this episode to catch-up with a previous Silent Why guest who has been through extra losses since we met her in early 2022.C...2022-07-0827 minThe Silent Why: finding hope in grief and lossThe Podcast Show 2022: London, baby!#035. We went to The Podcast Show, in London, baby! And in this episode we (your hosts, Chris & Claire) chat about our recent trip to the big city. Having visited the capital for the 'new international festival for podcasting' - The Podcast Show 2022 - with thousands of other podcasters, we share a bit about what we've learnt, what we saw and what we did.Listen in for some fun chat about undergrounds, escalators, Hamilton, podcasting things we learnt, £12million flats, Jubilee celebration preparations around Buckingham Palace, and of course, where loss might fit into all of thi...2022-06-0742 min
Hey Chaplain: The Police Wellness Podcast030 - Murder Investigation Teams: Steven Keogh, Scotland YardText a Message to the ShowToday we're talking to a recently retired detective from Scotland Yard, former Detective Inspector Steve Keogh. Steve spent 30 years working as a cop in London, much of that as a detective investigating murders and other violent crime, as well as the first suicide bombings in the UK. Steve's passion was solving murders by understanding the mindset and patterns of a killer and he continues to teach the lessons to people around the world. Today Steve explains what Scotland Yard is and shows us why it's synonymous with world class det...2022-06-0650 min