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Showing episodes and shows of
Colleen Freeland
Shows
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP316 Minisode: Next Time You Want To Numb Your Emotions With Alcohol, Try This Instead
In this episode, Colleen shares a raw, surprising takeaway from a recent retreat — one that had nothing to do with learning new concepts and everything to do with experiencing her body in a new way. What began as deep discomfort around words like sensuality and sexual energy opened into a realization many women quietly live with: when you've been taught to fear, suppress, or perform your body for others, you often shut down far more than sexuality — you shut down joy, creativity, pleasure, and aliveness. And when that energy stays blocked, the body looks for relief wherever it c...
2026-01-30
22 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP314 Minisode: How to pull yourself out of a funk without pouring a drink
In this episode, Colleen responds to a question many women hit right after real momentum begins: What if I slip back? What if the funk comes back and I lose everything I've built? Using a recent coaching call — and her own very real 5 a.m. spiral — she breaks down why the goal of emotional sobriety isn't avoiding hard days, negative thoughts, or uncomfortable emotions. It's learning how to recognize them early and change your relationship to them before they hijack your nervous system and run the day. Colleen explains why awareness is most of mental heal...
2026-01-23
23 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP312 Minisode: You're Not Broken, You're Wounded: The Truth About Trauma and Addiction
In this episode, Colleen unpacks one of the most misunderstood truths in emotional sobriety: drinking isn't a character issue — it's a nervous system response to chronic stress, shame, and unmet needs. Drawing from The Myth of Normal by Gabor Maté, she explains why so many of us learned to survive in environments that never felt safe — and how culture, economics, and generational trauma quietly wire our bodies to seek relief wherever we can find it. This episode explores why healing often makes the urge to numb louder at first, how shame removes our sense of choic...
2026-01-16
24 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP310 Minisode: Why big decisions make you want to drink (and what to do instead)
In this episode, Colleen breaks down one of the most misunderstood moments in personal growth: the space between feeling pressure to decide and actually being ready to decide. Drawing from her own experience with sobriety, divorce, and rebuilding her life from the ground up, she explains why urgency is almost never a sign of clarity — and why the nervous system's state matters more than the decision itself. Through the lens of emotional sobriety, Colleen introduces a simple but powerful framework for discerning truth from fear by tuning into the body's signals instead of the mind's panic.
2026-01-09
21 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP308 Minisode: The connection between overwhelm and the need to drink
🪩 HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!! 💃 In this episode, Colleen pulls back the curtain on what overwhelm actually looks like from the inside — not as a failure, not as burnout drama, but as a nervous system hitting its limit after years of living in survival mode. What began as growth, ambition, and "doing what needed to be done" quietly turned into a chronic stress response that her body could no longer sustain. Colleen shares how stress doesn't disappear just because it's fueled by passion or positive goals, why rest alone didn't bring her back online, and how ignoring t...
2026-01-02
23 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP302 Minisode: How To Make An Emotionally Sober "To-Do List" (For Type A Thinkers)
In this episode, Colleen speaks directly to the women who live and die by the checklist, the ones who can run circles around everyone else at work, keep ten plates spinning at home, and still collapse into bed wondering why they feel exhausted, behind, and overwhelmed. If you're a high-achiever who secretly depends on stress chemistry to function, this one is going to land. Colleen breaks down why the "box-checking brain" is so addicted to dopamine, adrenaline, and cortisol… and why that system eventually stops working. You'll hear how even the most capable women fall into the do...
2025-12-13
21 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP301 Minisode: To Drink OR Not To Drink On The Plane
In this episode, Colleen shares a real moment from her life a few weeks ago. The kind of moment everybody encounters but rarely names. On a Thursday flight, she felt calm, grounded, and uninterested in drinking at all. Forty-eight hours later, on the way out of New York, she couldn't wait for the flight attendant to serve her Chardonnay. Nothing "mysterious" happened in between. Her capacity changed. She unpacks how travel, lost work, accumulated stress, and zero real recovery time pushed her from a green-light nervous system into overwhelm — and how quickly old neural pathways stepped in to...
2025-12-11
20 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP298 Minisode: How to complete the stress response BEFORE you pour a drink
In this episode, Colleen shares a simple moment from her morning — a single unexpected email — that shows exactly how the nervous system can hijack your day before you even know what happened. What could've turned into urgency, frustration, and spiraling worst-case scenarios instead became a real-time example of emotional sobriety: noticing the startle, interrupting the stress response, and choosing from capacity instead of panic. She breaks down the subtle physiological chain reaction that happens long before overwhelm hits — the jolt, the mental spin, the internal "wall," the freeze — and shows how quickly your brain starts catastrophizing when your cap...
2025-12-04
24 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP296 Minisode: How to cope with overwhelm so you don't NEED to drink so much
In this episode, Colleen pulls the curtain back on overwhelm and names it for what it really is: a trauma response living in your nervous system, not a personal failing or lack of willpower. She walks through the five stages your body moves through when the demands on you exceed your capacity, and why trying to "push through" that wall only drives you deeper into shutdown. Instead of treating overwhelm as something to beat, Colleen shows you how to use it as a litmus test that tells you exactly when to stop, step back, and tend to...
2025-11-29
23 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP293 Minisode: What it means when you feel like you HAVE to do something
In this episode, Colleen shares a real-life story about her daughter's college move-in that reveals one of the most important skills in emotional sobriety: knowing the difference between a grounded choice and a nervous system hijack. What started as a harmless whiff of pot in the entryway spiraled into panic, urgency, and the impulse to move apartments immediately. But the real issue wasn't the apartment — it was a stress response scanning for danger. Colleen breaks down how fear narrows your perspective, why your brain searches for confirming evidence when you feel unsafe, and how to recognize the mo...
2025-11-22
22 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP292 Minisode: How to connect with your Higher Self
In this episode, Colleen breaks down one of the most foundational teachings of emotional sobriety: your higher self isn't a future version of you — she's a frequency you can access right now. Drawing from quantum physics, nervous system science, and the emotional practices at the core of this work, Colleen explains why clarity, intuition, creativity, and confidence aren't things you earn after healing enough trauma or doing everything "right." They emerge when you learn to quiet the noise of your subconscious programming, regulate your nervous system, and align your emotional state with the version of you who al...
2025-11-20
27 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP290 Minisode: You need a vision for WHO you are becoming
In this episode, Colleen walks us through a coaching moment that captures what emotional sobriety really means: shifting from self-criticism and control into vision and alignment. When one client arrived overwhelmed and focused on what her partner wasn't doing, the breakthrough came when she identified who she wanted to be — positive and powerful. From there, everything changed. Colleen unpacks how to train the brain to serve your vision instead of your fear, why alignment between mind and body is the true foundation of change, and how to stop letting your thoughts drain your energy.
2025-11-15
19 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP289 Minisode: Don't Let the Slip Become a Slide
In this deeply personal reflection, Colleen opens up about her own history with bulimia and the years she spent trying to control her body to manage her emotions. Inspired by Jennette McCurdy's memoir I'm Glad My Mom Died, she explores how disordered eating, drinking, and perfectionism all share the same root: unprocessed emotion and the desperate need to feel safe, seen, and in control. Through her story — and Jennette's — Colleen reframes recovery as a compassionate, iterative process. True healing isn't about getting it right; it's about breaking the shame cycle that turns a slip into a slide.
2025-11-13
24 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP287 Minisode: Are you available to Be. Here. Now?
In this reflective episode, Colleen shares how a single morning meditation changed the trajectory of her entire day — and became a living practice for emotional sobriety. Waking early with her mind already spinning, she found herself caught in the familiar loop of pressure, striving, and self-imposed urgency. Instead of chasing a better plan, she chose presence. The phrase "I'm available to be here now" became a reset — a nervous-system gear shift that moved her from fight-and-fix into calm and clarity. From treadmill runs to team decisions, Colleen explores how availability opens the door to peace, crea...
2025-11-08
25 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP263 Minisode: Country Roads Take Me Home (2): Doubling down on my performance strategies
In this continuation, Colleen shares how West Virginia shifted her in ways she didn't see coming. She found herself in a community where image didn't matter, where people belonged by being present, not by performing. That freedom to be—messy hair, bare face, imperfect and real—awakened something deeper: the possibility of self-trust. The relationships and experiences from that time became a compass she carried forward. Even as life evolved, that season revealed what authenticity feels like, and how quickly it disappears when we chase approval instead of honoring ourselves. 🔑 Key Takeaways True...
2025-09-13
13 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP262 Minisode: Country Roads Take Me Home (1): Checking all the boxes
In this episode, Colleen begins a five-part mini-series by reflecting on a season of life where everything looked perfect on the outside—four children, big career moves, and daily discipline to name a few. But on the inside she was hollow, disconnected, and coping in ways that kept her stuck. The move to West Virginia became more than a change of scenery; it became a field trip into herself. It was here she first began to see the difference between living to perform and learning to be. What felt like upheaval at the time now stands out as...
2025-09-11
12 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP260 Minisode: Have you noticed what you notice?
In this episode, Colleen explores the powerful intersection of science and spirituality—from dopamine research and environmental design to Michael Singer, Don Miguel Ruiz, and Bruce Lipton. Drawing on both brain science and lived experience, she makes a simple but life-changing point: reality isn't what's "out there." It's what your brain chooses to notice. Out of millions of possible inputs, your brain filters just a few—and those choices shape your emotions, your energy, and your life. Truth is not abstract dogma or moral code—it's the felt sense that opens your heart and mind. When you learn...
2025-09-06
14 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP259 Minisode: The Mindset That Sees The Problem Is The Problem
In this episode, Colleen shares a personal story of missed flights, expired licenses, stolen wallets—and how choosing bat-shit positive over bat-shit negative turned each obstacle into an unexpected gift. With humor and honesty, she reframes setbacks not as evidence that life is against us, but as opportunities to practice trust, adaptability, and creativity. Through this lens, even a canceled car rental or lost wallet becomes training ground for a deeper truth: the problem is never the problem. It's the mindset that labels it as wrong that keeps us stuck. When we shift into curiosity—asking, "How is t...
2025-09-04
16 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP257 Minisode: Adjusting Expectations For The Holidays (Part 2)
In this follow-up episode, Colleen shares a personal holiday stumble—an experience she originally recorded in late 2024, but one that still rings true as we look ahead to the upcoming season. She names it a "relapse," not because of how much she drank but because of the disconnect between what she wanted and what actually happened. Instead of hiding it, she walks through the three-question framework from Part One, showing in real time how to turn what looks like failure into data, compassion, and next steps. Through honest reflection, she reframes her week of drinking with family as...
2025-08-30
15 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP256 Minisode: Adjusting Expectations For The Holidays (Part 1)
As the holiday season approaches, this episode—originally recorded after Thanksgiving 2024—offers perspective that's just as relevant now as it was then. Colleen pulls apart one of the biggest myths of change: that it's the behavior itself that's hard. The truth? It's the act of change—the moment you take your brain off autopilot—that feels so uncomfortable. From holiday chaos to daily overwhelm, she shows how perfectionism and constant performance keep you stuck, and why setbacks are not proof of failure but invitations to learn. She reframes relapse, stress, and "slip-ups" as tests—opportunities to gather i...
2025-08-28
16 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP254 Minisode: Tired Is A Feeling, Not A Fact
In this episode, Colleen unpacks one of the most common struggles in early sobriety and beyond: bone-deep exhaustion. She shares her own experience quitting alcohol (and much more) all at once, and how the "post-acute withdrawal syndrome" myth left her believing she'd be tired and unmotivated for years. What she eventually discovered is that tiredness isn't just physical—it's an emotional signal tied to how you're thinking, what you're carrying, and how you're responding to your body. She reframes fatigue as a feeling, not a fixed fact. She lays out the calls to action—hydration, movement, thought work...
2025-08-23
14 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP253 Minisode: My Coach Just Fixed My Brain
In this episode, Colleen gives an update on the behind-the-scenes of what happened after being suddenly cut from a program she'd once called home. At first, she carried the weight of unfairness and betrayal, convinced it would take a long time to heal. But what started as a sting that clung to her body and mind turned into something radically different: a live demonstration of releasing the story that was holding her hostage. Through an unexpected NLP exercise with her coach, she revisits the childhood wound at the root of her pain and dismantles the old belief...
2025-08-21
17 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP251 Minisode: OMG! I Was Kicked From My Coaching Program
In this episode, Colleen pulls back the curtain on a personal "bitch slap from the universe" that arrived in the form of a sudden, unexplained expulsion from a coaching program she once considered family. What could have been a spiral into shame became something else entirely—a masterclass in emotional sovereignty. She walks you through the shock, the grief, and the moment she realized: this wasn't actually about her. Instead of chasing fairness or demanding explanations, she chose action over rumination, redirecting her energy toward opportunities that actually align with her values. With candor, humor, and zero se...
2025-08-16
16 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP250 Minisode: Fault vs. Responsibility
In this episode, Colleen dismantles one of the most costly habits we carry through life: the obsession with figuring out whose fault it is. She makes a powerful distinction between fault—the cause of a problem—and responsibility—your power to choose how you respond. The moment you stop waiting for someone else to make things right, you stop handing them your power. With humor, wordplay, and grounded examples, she shows how clinging to blame keeps you stuck, resentful, and drained—while letting go frees you to act from a place of choice, not victimhood. Whether it's waiting...
2025-08-14
10 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP248 Minisode: When You Feel Like You Did Something Wrong
In this episode, Colleen shares a raw, behind-the-scenes moment from her own emotional funk and breaks down exactly how she worked through it—thought by thought, feeling by feeling. From vacation wine to love-bombing exes to that post-holiday productivity pressure, she shows how even seemingly minor emotional clutter can trigger deep, subconscious beliefs that hijack your nervous system. Instead of bypassing or blaming her mood, Colleen slows down and listens—uncovering the core belief underneath it all: I've done something wrong. What follows is a masterclass in emotional self-leadership. You'll hear how she clears the subconscious "rock in h...
2025-08-09
22 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP247 Minisode: Thinking About vs. Listening To Anxiety
In this episode, Colleen reframes one of the most misunderstood experiences in recovery: anxiety. Far from being just a diagnosis or a quirk of personality, anxiety is presented as a signal—an embodied alert system that points to the quality of your thoughts. She breaks down the real reason alcohol feels impossible to control: not because you're broken, but because your brain, hijacked by stress, is obsessing over a problem it thinks it must fix. And when that problem is alcohol, you become trapped in a loop of overthinking, guilt, and trying harder—while your body begs for...
2025-08-07
16 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP245 Minisode: You Don't Have To Think About That
In this episode, Colleen names the real culprit behind so many evening drinking spirals: not lack of willpower, but an overloaded nervous system weighed down by thought patterns we treat as facts. She challenges the idea that we need to "solve" our problems in order to feel better—and instead offers a radical invitation: what if the problems aren't the problem? What if it's our focus that's keeping us stuck? Through candid stories from her own life, Colleen models what it looks like to let go of the drama we're not meant to carry. From ex-spouses to gl...
2025-08-02
12 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP244 Minisode: You Can't F*** This Up
In this episode, Colleen shares a game-changing reframe about why we actually get stuck—even when we have the motivation, the clarity, and the plan. Building on fresh neuroscience from Dr. Kira Babinet, she introduces us to the habenula, a lesser-known part of the brain that slams the brakes on our behavior when failure is perceived—whether it's already happened or we're just afraid it might. Colleen unpacks how the brain's bias toward failure and loss doesn't just stall action—it can kill our momentum completely. But instead of forcing progress through pressure or willpower, she offers a gent...
2025-07-31
13 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP242 Minisode: The Process And Payoff Of Emotional Sobriety
In this episode, Colleen shares a quiet but powerful moment from one of her recent coaching calls—where a client celebrated a huge win, and Colleen noticed her own body signaling that something was off. What unfolded wasn't a rupture, but a subtle shift: a reminder that even seasoned leaders can bypass consent in moments of well-meaning reflex. And that noticing the signal doesn't mean spiraling—it means listening. Through her own self-check-in, she unpacks what it looks like to be emotionally sober in the face of mild shame: not resisting it, not fixing it, just feeling it l...
2025-07-26
19 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP241 Minisode: The POINT Of Feeling Your Feelings
In today's episode, Colleen walks us through a deceptively simple question that came up on a recent coaching call: How do I actually feel my feelings? The answer isn't mindset. It isn't a technique. It's presence. She explores the difference between thinking about emotions and physically experiencing them—without adding a story, a solution, or a label. With grounded metaphors and everyday honesty, she invites you to see emotions as temporary energy—not identity. You'll hear what happens when we resist that energy, and how easily it creates stagnation, self-protection, and shame loops that can shape entire patt...
2025-07-24
23 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP239 Minisode: Somebody put a vape in my car
In today's episode, Colleen shares a personal and refreshingly honest story about her relationship with nicotine—and how emotional sobriety has shifted the way she responds to temporary imbalance. What starts as a candid reflection on sneaky vape relapses becomes a powerful reminder that healing isn't about perfection. It's about how we respond when we veer off course. Colleen takes us through her own journey of regulating her nervous system, loosening old beliefs about addiction, and trusting that balance always returns—especially when we stop making a big deal out of being human. This isn't a story abou...
2025-07-19
17 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP238 Minisode: How To Get Unworried
In today's episode, Colleen lifts the veil on a common self-sabotage mechanism that often flies under the radar: worry. What begins as a moment of genuine joy and success quickly dissolves into anxiety—and not because something actually went wrong, but because her nervous system quietly panicked at how good it all felt. Using a relatable personal story and the concept of the "upper limit problem," Colleen explores how we unconsciously block positive emotions the moment they start to expand. Whether it's a burst of pride, creative momentum, or a deep sense of peace, many of...
2025-07-17
10 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP237 Why sobriety programs don't work (and what to do instead)
Click here to watch on YouTube! If you've ever done an alcohol free challenge for 30, 60 or 90 days, maybe even a year, only to fall back into old habits when you started drinking again— this episode is for you. In today's deep dive, Colleen Freeland explains why behavior-based sobriety models (like Sober Sis, Annie Grace, and Casey Davidson's approaches) can actually keep you trapped in the very drinking cycle you're trying to escape. You'll learn why the real issue isn't alcohol — it's the perfectionistic, all-or-nothing mindset these programs reinforce. Colleen unpacks the neuroscience of habit change and...
2025-07-15
30 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP236 Minisode: The Litmus Test For Your Truth
In today's episode, Colleen peels back the curtain on one of the most radical shifts we can make: recognizing that we are not our thoughts—we're the observer behind them. What starts as a reflection on managing the energy in your body becomes a masterclass in emotional authorship, reminding us that our thoughts, not our circumstances, are what create our lived reality. Using the metaphor of a self-driving car, Colleen breaks down how most of us are unconsciously letting outdated programming steer our lives. But it doesn't have to be that way. When you take back the wh...
2025-07-12
18 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP235 Minisode: The Solution To Every Problem Is To Own It
In today's episode, Colleen walks us through a high-stakes moment with one of her clients—standing at the emotional fork in the road between old habits and radical self-responsibility. After a tense night at her childhood home, surrounded by triggering family dynamics and judgment, this client found herself spiraling into shame after a single shot of tequila… and a familiar pattern of self-attack. With her sister likely ready to confront her, she reached out for support—not to fix the situation, but to reclaim her power before it got hijacked. What unfolds is a masterclass in ner...
2025-07-10
14 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP233 Minisode: Becoming The Master Of Your Own Attention And Focus
In today's episode, Colleen shares a real-life moment of emotional sobriety in action—when an old blog post, a rogue email, and a morning scroll tried to hijack her peace before she even got out of bed. What begins as a minor tech task quickly spirals into a stress response… until she catches it. Instead of reacting from urgency, she pauses, reconnects with her intention for the day, and remembers: just because it feels urgent doesn't mean it is. This episode is a practical, embodied reminder that emotional sobriety isn't about getting it perfect—it's about...
2025-07-05
11 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP232 Minisode: Healing Emotionally Abusive Thinking Habits
In today's episode, Colleen reveals the sneaky way our own thoughts quietly become emotional abuse—and how to interrupt the habit of thinking things that hurt. From bedtime mirror pep talks to buried beliefs about being "a hot mess," this episode explores how subconscious thought loops create the feelings that sabotage your confidence, relationships, and self-trust. Colleen explains how your nervous system isn't reacting to your circumstances—it's reacting to your story. And most of that story? It's fiction you've been rehearsing for years. If you're ready to stop bullying yourself with thoughts you'd never say...
2025-07-03
09 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP230 Minisode: Processing The Background Alarm
In today's episode, Colleen unpacks why your background alarm is going off—and how to finally turn it off. You're not lazy. You're not broken. And your bedtime resistance, your anxious spinouts, your self-sabotage? They're not random. They. Are. Patterns. Habits formed by younger versions of you who were just trying to stay safe. This episode dives into how childhood beliefs shape your nervous system, why emotional energy gets trapped in the body, and how to reclaim that energy instead of wasting it on panic, shame, or perfectionism. If your anxiety feels like it r...
2025-06-28
15 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP229 Minisode: The Black Mirror
You've probably heard me say the common phrase "the call is coming from inside the house" — but what if every judgment you make about someone else is too? In this episode, Colleen unpacks the concept of The Black Mirror — the idea that your emotional reactions to other people are often projections of the stories, beliefs, and insecurities you hold about yourself. You'll learn how to flip the script when you're triggered by someone else's behavior, turn judgment into powerful self-awareness, and use emotional sobriety skills to stop reacting from fear and start responding from clarity. This...
2025-06-26
10 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP 227 Minisode: The Upper Limit Problem
Most women don't realize how uncomfortable they are with feeling good—until things start going too well. That's when the sabotage creeps in. A snappy comment. A skipped workout. An unnecessary glass of wine. In today's episode, Colleen breaks down the concept of the "upper limit problem" from The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks—and explains how perfectionists and people-pleasers unknowingly block joy, ease, and success by clinging to struggle. You'll learn how your emotional thermostat gets set in childhood, why guilt and discomfort with pleasure keep you stuck, and how to reset your internal basel...
2025-06-21
10 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP226 Minisode: Becoming Unfuckwithable instead of resentful
In today's episode, Colleen shares a powerful one-on-one coaching conversation with a client who was dreading a weekend trip with her judgmental, high-maintenance mother-in-law. What started as a fear of overdrinking turned into something much deeper—a real-time lesson in emotional ownership, boundaries, and what it means to become unfuckwithable. This episode isn't about family dynamics—it's about taking your power back. If you've ever agreed to something just to avoid conflict and ended up feeling resentful, this is for you. You'll walk away with practical language, new scripts, and the mindset shift that will help...
2025-06-19
09 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP224 Minisode: Feeling rushed is not a fact
In today's episode, Colleen unpacks a subtle but powerful mindset that can completely shift how you experience stress, pressure, and time. Whether it's a packed calendar, an airport sprint, or your own inner critic barking about everything you should be doing, the real problem isn't your to-do list—it's your nervous system. This episode explores how urgency is often just emotional dysregulation in disguise, and why "getting everything done" will never create the calm you're actually craving. If you're constantly on the go, juggling work, family, and the secret shame of overdrinking, this one will he...
2025-06-12
06 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP222 Minisode: Stop Chasing The Highs
In today's episode, Colleen shares a personal reflection on what it means to stay emotionally sober when things are going really well. When the business is booming, the boxes are checked, and it feels like everything is finally clicking. Most of us assume that emotional work is about learning how to handle hard moments—grief, anxiety, cravings, conflict, etc. Though that's true in it's own right, there is still a catch. ----> If your mood is dictated by external wins, then your nervous system is still being hijacked, and the crash that follows might be more s...
2025-06-07
09 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP221 Minisode: How to actually feel your feelings
In this episode, Colleen breaks down the difference between thinking your feelings and actually feeling them—and why most high-achieving women get stuck in a loop that keeps them stressed, stuck, and searching for answers in the wrong places. You'll learn a simple, body-based skill that helps you shift out of emotional overwhelm and back into clarity, presence, and personal power—without needing to fix, solve, or overexplain anything at all. Whether you're drinking to numb the noise or overthinking your way into burnout, this episode will show you how to interrupt the loop and fina...
2025-06-05
14 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP219 Minisode: Anxiety is an alarm
Most of us see anxiety as a personal flaw—something to fix, medicate, or avoid. But what if anxiety isn't the problem at all? What if it's the invitation? In today's episode, Colleen breaks down the two types of anxiety as explained by Dr. Russell Kennedy—foreground alarm and background alarm—and shares a personal story of how unresolved fears and childhood programming were quietly driving Colleen into burnout... even though her mindset looked great on the surface. This isn't just about alcohol. It's about understanding the real source of your stress, shifting from self-bullying to sel...
2025-05-31
12 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP218 Minisode: Reducing Anxiety is the Anti-Goal
In today's episode, Colleen dismantles one of the most common mindset traps she see's in her clients: the belief that anxiety is something to get rid of. If you've ever said, "I'm just an anxious person," or used alcohol to calm your nerves before a flight, presentation, or party—you're not alone. But what if anxiety itself isn't the problem? She'll walk you through a real client breakthrough where they shifted the focus away from "less anxiety" and toward something far more powerful: a regulated nervous system. You'll learn why trying to "not drink" or "not be an...
2025-05-29
11 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP216 Minisode: Pursuing Purpose Instead Of "Less Alcohol"
In today's episode, you'll hear a deeply personal story about the night Colleen's college-age kids brought home a big bottle of vodka—and invited her to join them. Years ago, this would've been the moment she feared the most. But something powerful has shifted. You'll hear how self-trust changes everything, how desire—not discipline—is what drives real transformation, and why the solution to alcohol use disorder has nothing to do with drinking. Whether you're still stuck in the "managing it" phase or wondering how to build a life that feels bigger than your nightly glass...
2025-05-24
11 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP215 Minisode: This is the woo-woo part
If the solution to alcohol use disorder isn't a behavior, but a feeling— HOW THE HELL DO YOU PRACTICE A FEELING? In today's episode, Colleen breaks down the mindset shift that will completely change the way you think about manifestation. Not the toxic, glittery, vision-board version. But the grounded, neuroscience-backed practice of training your body and brain to feel powerful on purpose—so you don't need alcohol to feel that way for you. Colleen explains why "wanting" and "waiting" energy keeps you stuck, why your thoughts aren't facts (even the convincing ones), and how to get o...
2025-05-22
16 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP213 Minisode:Small Emotions Have Big CONsequences
In today's episode, Colleen shares a story about a client who unsubscribed from her email list—and how that one glitch almost triggered a cascade of false assumptions, unspoken tension, and missed opportunity. It's a reminder that the smallest emotional reactions (the ones that barely register) are often the most dangerous. Because they go unchecked. Unquestioned. Unchallenged. This episode will help you stop letting your emotions drive blind—and show you how to reroute your thinking so you can create a different future than your past. 💡 Key Takeaways: Emotions are learned rules e...
2025-05-17
16 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP212 Minisode: It's not where you are... it's how you respond
In today's episode, Colleen shares the most powerful skill you can develop on your emotional sobriety journey: how you respond to yourself when you slip into old habits. Whether you drank more than you planned or simply feel like you've lost your way again, this episode will rewire how you think about failure—and help you stop reinforcing the very pattern you're trying to break. Colleen walks you through the real moment of change (it's not what you think), why "starting over" is a trap, and the nervous system reset that turns shame into self-trust.
2025-05-15
15 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP210 Minisode: Simple Technique For Letting Go
In today's episode, Colleen shares a simple and powerful practice that can shift your energy in seconds—and help you stop carrying what your body is desperate to let go of. If you've ever felt like you should stop drinking, overworking, or people-pleasing—but you keep doing it anyway—this episode will show you why resistance doesn't work, and how to reconnect with the wisdom of your body instead. Plus, Colleen walks you through a one-breath nervous system reset called The Sigh—a technique that helps you release emotional pain, shift mental patterns, and return to a sta...
2025-05-10
14 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP209 Minisode: Controlling your energy flow
Today's episode is all about emotional flow—how energy moves through your body and what to do when it gets stuck. Colleen explains how your thoughts can block the natural upward movement of desire, inspiration, and curiosity—reversing the flow and creating emotional heaviness, anxiety, and burnout. You'll learn why it's not always necessary to unpack your childhood or analyze every emotion. Sometimes the simplest shift comes from asking: is this thought opening me up, or shutting me down? Whether you're stuck in your career, your relationship, or your relationship with alcohol—this episode will show y...
2025-05-08
16 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP207 Minisode: Accept the invitation to be okay no matter what
Today's episode is all about the practice of being okay no matter what. Colleen shares the mindset shift that changed everything for her—especially while growing her business on TikTok—and how you can apply the same concept to anything in your life. Whether it's tech glitches, traffic, or your partner's tone of voice, there's always an invitation to be bothered—or an opportunity to practice emotional sobriety instead. This episode will show you why true freedom isn't about changing your circumstances; it's about expanding your capacity to stay unbothered in the middle of them.
2025-05-03
16 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP206 Minisode: Don't try to do it "right," just do better
In today's episode, Colleen shares a powerful mindset shift that can make changing any habit feel easier, faster, and more sustainable: stop trying to "get it right" — just focus on getting it better. Inspired by the concept of the iterative mindset from Dr. Kira Bobinet's research, Colleen explains why the old black-and-white idea of relapse and failure doesn't belong in habit change—and how a simple shift in thinking can remove the shame, accelerate your progress, and help you design a lifestyle that actually fits the life you want to live. Whether you're working on your...
2025-05-01
13 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP205 Q&A: When you're trying to change but your partner still drinks too much
On today's episode, Colleen answers a question from a listener who's successfully changed her own drinking habits—but finds herself frustrated by her husband's drinking. If you've ever felt like someone else's behavior is sabotaging your progress, this episode will help you take back your emotional power. Colleen walks through her framework for emotional ownership and teaches how to release the belief that someone else's choices have to hold you back. You'll learn how to shift the story you're telling yourself, meet your own needs, and define success on your terms. 💡 Key Takeaways:
2025-04-29
17 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP204 Minisode: How can I make this easy and fun?
In this episode, Colleen invites you to take your emotional temperature and ask a powerful question that could change everything: How can I make this fun and easy? Whether you're racing through your day with a nervous system stuck in overdrive or stuck in bed with your to-do list haunting you, the solution isn't more hustle—it's ease. But ease isn't a circumstance. It's an emotional state. And you can learn to choose it on purpose. Key Takeaways: • You can't fix overwhelm with more action—emotional ease has to become the goal...
2025-04-26
11 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP203 Minisode: Make friends with the feeling
In today's episode, Colleen shares a raw and relatable story about frustration, tech fails, and the moment she remembered one of the most powerful tools she teaches: making friends with your feelings. You'll hear how a seemingly small trigger (a broken download link before a long workday) became the perfect opportunity to practice emotional sobriety. She walks you through how to recognize emotional inflammation, catch unhelpful thoughts, and redirect your energy—before it hijacks your day. Because the truth is, your emotions aren't the problem.... They're trying to help you. If you li...
2025-04-24
16 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP202 Q&A: Tend to get over-served by your friends?
Colleen answers a listener question from a woman who's done incredible work reducing her drinking—but still finds herself overdoing it when she's with her best friend. Sound familiar? Whether it's wine with your ride-or-die or happy hour with the same old crew, this episode gives you the tools to enjoy yourself and feel good the next morning. Colleen breaks down how to stop waiting for your friend to change, and start setting yourself up for success instead—without guilt, codependency, or willpower battles halfway through the second bottle. This is a powerful behi...
2025-04-22
13 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP201 Minisode: Negative thinking generates error codes in your brain
In today's episode, Colleen breaks down how the language you use—especially when it seems neutral or logical—can silently sabotage your ability to change. You'll hear why "I just need to stop drinking" is actually a negative thought (and how it keeps your brain stuck in the problem instead of moving toward the solution). She explains how to recognize these mental error codes, shift into a more empowered mindset, and start generating real momentum—even with something as small as making it to a yoga class. Key Takeaways: Your brain can...
2025-04-19
10 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP200 Minisode: How to soothe your "HOT MESS"
In today's episode, Colleen shares a personal reflection she recorded nearly a year ago—but it's just as relevant now, especially if you're feeling stuck, off-balance, or like a hot mess who should be further along by now. This episode isn't about getting it all together—it's about what to do when you don't. You'll hear how she used the exact tools from the program to navigate the emotional chaos of working too much, losing old routines post-divorce, and telling herself the story that she wasn't making any progress. You'll learn how to decode those famili...
2025-04-17
11 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP199 The 3 invisible gaps that sabotage your ability to change your drinking habits
"Stop saying that you want to stay sober or drink in moderation. Because what you really want is to feel calm, capable, and in control." Colleen Freeland Kachmann There are 3 invisible, unmet needs that keep high-achieving women from easily changing their drinking habits: a lack of connection, direction and feedback. If you've ever wondered "Why am I doing this to myself?"—this episode will change the way you think about drinking, self-trust, and your ability to change. I'll explain how alcohol has become both a problem and a sol...
2025-04-15
37 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP 198 Minisode: How to manifest a healthy relationship with alcohol
In today's episode, we're flipping the script on what it means to "manifest change" when it comes to your relationship with alcohol. Every habit you have was built through attention, repetition, and belief. You already know how to manifest. You've done it before. The question is: can you do it on purpose? If you've ever told yourself "I know better and won't do that again", but you keep doing it anyway, this episode is a must-listen. You'll learn how shame hijacks your perception, why logic won't get you out of a drinking spiral, and the exact method...
2025-04-12
16 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP195 Minisode: How your fears alter your behavior
In today's episode, you'll explore one of the most common patterns that keeps high-achieving women stuck: worrying about what other people might think. Colleen breaks down how the fear of being misunderstood, judged, or perceived a certain way can quietly derail your growth, your boundaries, and your goals. You'll learn why managing other people's emotions never works—and what to do instead when your nervous system wants to retreat. Key Takeaways Fear of what others think is a distraction from your purpose When you're focused on being perceived the "right" way, you're no longer roo...
2025-04-05
09 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP194 Minisode: Making friends with my brain fog
In this reflective episode, Colleen shares a personal moment from a particularly full chapter in her life—a season of growth, transition, and pushing hard to bring her program to life. What began as a weekend packed with work turned into a deeper realization about brain fog, creative blocks, and the quiet wisdom of the body. If you've ever tried to think your way through exhaustion or override your energy in the name of getting things done, this one's for you. It's a reminder that alignment matters more than output—and that sometimes, the clearest signal you'll get...
2025-04-03
17 min
Reduce Your Drinking by 80%
02 Hi! I'm Colleen. I WAS an alcoholic!
Click here to schedule a discovery call with Colleen Click here to take the quiz: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem? Click here to read the TNC program overview for Emotional Sobriety Coaching©. Click here to listen to the It's Not About the Alcohol podcast. Click here to calculate The Real Cost of Alcohol Use Disorder
2025-03-21
05 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP180 Minisode: Comfort zone vs. window of tolerance
In today's episode, Colleen breaks down the difference between your comfort zone and your window of tolerance. She explains that while your comfort zone feels safe and familiar, real growth happens on the other side—when you're willing to feel a little uncomfortable and take small actions. Colleen shows how moving your body, even in tiny ways, can shift your mindset and help you manage stress more effectively. Key Takeaways • Stepping Out of Familiarity: Your comfort zone is soothing because it's familiar, but everything you want lies just beyond it. Growth requires you to take small step...
2025-03-01
12 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP174 Minisode: Stop working on yourself- you're not broken
In today's episode, Colleen explores a common challenge: the struggle to maintain consistent effort in self-care and personal growth. She uncovers the hidden beliefs that might be driving resistance and shares how shifting your motivation—from fixing yourself to gifting yourself—can transform your relationship with self-care. Learn how to reconnect with your future self, reframe your mindset, and take actions that feel like a gift rather than a chore. Key Takeaways: The Truth About Resistance: Resistance to self-care often stems from subconscious beliefs that you need to "fix" yourself. Shame-driven motivation triggers your brai...
2025-02-15
10 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP173 Minisode: What type of person are you?
In today's episode, Colleen reveals a powerful strategy for creating lasting change by shifting your identity instead of relying on willpower or discipline. Discover how embracing the mindset of "I'm the type of person who…" can naturally align your behaviors with your goals, without the exhausting cycle of self-criticism or perfectionism. Colleen shares practical steps to practice being the version of yourself you aspire to become, one small, mindful step at a time. Key Takeaways: Willpower vs. Identity-Based Change: Relying on willpower to change behaviors is unsustainable and creates a yo-yo cycle of self-defeat. In...
2025-02-13
09 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP171 Minisode: Uncovering deeply rooted limiting beliefs
In today's episode, Colleen introduces a transformative exercise to uncover the deeply rooted beliefs that might be holding you back from achieving your goals around alcohol. Learn how to identify these limiting thoughts, challenge their validity, and replace them with empowering beliefs that align with the identity you want to build. This episode is a must-listen for high-achieving women who are ready to break free from shame-based narratives and create lasting, identity-based change. Key Takeaways: Beliefs Are Thoughts You No Longer Question: Many limiting beliefs feel true simply because they are habitual thoughts you've...
2025-02-08
07 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP170 Minisode: Try some crazy talk today
In today's episode, Colleen challenges you to radically shift how you dialogue with yourself by treating yourself as a trusted friend and cherished companion. Discover how identity-based change starts with the way you talk to yourself and how this simple practice can crowd out negative self-talk, foster self-respect, and lead to lasting transformation. Key Takeaways: Thoughts and Identity: Your thoughts are powerful and habitual, shaping your identity and influencing your ability to change. Behavior-based change—trying to prove your worth through actions—often fails because it conflicts with how you see yourself. Identity-based change is rooted in d...
2025-02-06
09 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP168 Minisode: Why haven't I been reading?
In this episode, Colleen shares how our habitual thoughts are often attempts to solve emotional problems and regulate our nervous systems. She dives into her own experience of stress-induced burnout, driven by hyper-focus on business analytics, and the creative stagnation it caused. By recognizing these patterns, Colleen highlights how to reset with small, intentional habits that prioritize self-care and help you regain balance and creativity. Key Takeaways: Thoughts as Habits: Most of our thoughts are habitual patterns developed to solve emotional discomfort. Your brain is constantly seeking control and certainty, often at the expense of creativity...
2025-02-01
10 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP167 Minisode: Radical change is 1 percent improvement
In this episode, Colleen shares a powerful mindset shift inspired by James Clear's philosophy: meaningful change doesn't require radical transformation. Instead, it's about embracing a process of incremental improvement, rooted in changing your identity and self-perception. Colleen explains why the first step to sustainable change is redefining how you think about yourself and the process of change itself, while introducing the 1% Rule to help you measure and celebrate progress. Key Takeaways: The Problem with All-or-Nothing Thinking: As high achievers and perfectionists, we often set lofty, unsustainable goals that lead to burnout and self-criticism. Shame-based motivation might...
2025-01-30
10 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP165 Minisode: Why change feels so HARD
In today's episode, Colleen dives into the importance of setting realistic and achievable goals when it comes to detoxing or taking a break from alcohol. She shares insights on why habits feel hard to break, the role of internal programming, and the importance of creating an environment that supports your goals. If you've ever struggled with sticking to a goal or felt overwhelmed by the idea of change, this episode offers a clear and compassionate approach to navigating challenges and setting yourself up for success. Key Takeaways: Why Habits Feel Hard: Managing a drinking habit is...
2025-01-25
15 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP164 Minisode: Learning to tolerate uncertainty
In today's episode, Colleen unpacks a profound quote from Mark Manson and explores how the pursuit of positive experiences often leads to stress and dissatisfaction. She explains how accepting negative experiences can actually transform your emotional state and offers practical steps to break free from the cycle of overthinking and stress. If you've ever felt stuck in your head, driven by the need to "figure it all out," this episode is your guide to stepping into the present moment, regulating your nervous system, and finding peace. Key Takeaways: Mark Manson's Wisdom: "Pursuing a positive experience...
2025-01-23
08 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP162 Minisode: Why you're manifesting what you don't want
In this episode, Colleen dives deep into how shifting your focus from what you don't want to what you truly desire can transform your mindset and your relationship with alcohol—and beyond. She explains why the brain's operating system doesn't understand "don't" and "shouldn't" and how these error codes keep us stuck in overthinking and emotional inflammation. Colleen offers practical strategies to build neural pathways toward what you do want by reverse engineering your thought processes and connecting to how you want to feel. Whether you're navigating alcohol use disorder or any other life challenge, this episode provides actionable st...
2025-01-18
10 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP161 Minisode: Actually, your feelings are facts!
In today's episode, Colleen shares a personal story about navigating a tense encounter with a neighbor who demanded drastic action after a minor incident involving her dog. Using this real-life situation, she demonstrates how to clear an emotional reaction in real time by properly diagnosing the problem, managing feelings, and resetting the nervous system. This episode highlights the importance of emotional regulation, how to move from reaction mode to intentional action, and how to maintain an empowered mindset even in difficult circumstances. Key Takeaways: Diagnose the Neutral Facts: When confronted with a highly emotional situation...
2025-01-16
09 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP159 Minisode: Processing the shame of past mistakes
Click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. If you're ready to fully commit to your personal growth and do the work to get emotionally sober (side effects include an 80 percent reduction in drinking),You'll walk away from our call with a clear understanding of how to get the skills you need to transform your life. —Want daily updates from me? Find me on TikTok @hangoverwhisperer and IG @thehangoverwhisperer —Click here to TAKE THE QUIZ: Do you have a drinking problem or a thinking problem? In this powerful and vulnerable epis...
2025-01-11
20 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
EP141 BONUS! Mindful Drinking and Moderation with "Mostly Sober" author Susan Keller
In this special bonus episode, Colleen interviews Susan Keller, author of the new book Mostly Sober: A Love Story and a Road Trip. Susan shares her personal journey of rethinking her relationship with alcohol, how she found her way into the mindful drinking movement, and why she wrote Mostly Sober, a groundbreaking novel for those who want to cut back on drinking without quitting entirely. In this conversation, Colleen and Susan discuss: Susan's background in healthcare education and how it influenced her interest in alcohol moderation. The appeal of mindful drinking and how...
2024-09-19
43 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Ep91: How to heal (instead of cope with) emotional triggers (Part 2) with Ruth Fearnow
How do you cope with panic attacks, mood swings, eruptions of rage or other illogical reactions that feel out of proportion to the situation? Many of us think the antidote to emotional reactivity is to distract ourselves with positivity. We take a breath, try to walk it off or visualize a basket of puppies on the beach at sunset. We tell ourselves to just let it go and to stop letting it bother us. Which sounds great. But HOW do you actually do that? Especially when it keeps happening? ...
2023-12-12
51 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Ep 90: How to heal (instead of cope with) emotional triggers (Part 1) with Ruth Fearnow
How do you cope with panic attacks, mood swings, eruptions of rage and other illogical reactions that feel out of proportion to the situation? Many of us think the antidote to emotional reactivity is to distract ourselves with positivity. We take a breath, try to walk it off or visualize a basket of puppies on the beach at sunset. We tell ourselves to just let it go and to stop letting it bother us. Which sounds great. But HOW do you actually do that? Especially when it keeps happening? ...
2023-12-12
35 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Ep 84 Resolving Ambivalence (Part 5) The invisible obstacle you must overcome to enjoy being sober
How do you feel when you see people on television sharing a flask around a roaring campfire, enjoying a bottle of red wine with a 5-course meal, or sliding into a steaming bubble bath with a crystal goblet of cold Chardonnay? No matter how committed you are to drinking less or not at all, scenes that associate drinking with pleasure can trigger temptation. You may experience a burst of discontent, have an urge to finish the cake or start reconsidering your resolve to avoid alcohol. And it's disheartening to imagine longing for...
2023-11-14
23 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Ep 83 Resolving Ambivalence (Part 4) How to break your emotional attachments to alcohol so drinking loses it's appeal
How much time do you think someone needs to stay sober once the physical addiction to alcohol has been broken? Most people quit drinking with a goal in mind. And whether they are aiming to stay sober forever or just participating in Sober October, success is measured by the number of alcohol free days. But taking a break to simply reset your tolerance, or swearing off alcohol forever because you've surrendered to the idea that you're an alcoholic, are two sides of the same coin. Both goals are based on the ide...
2023-11-14
19 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Ep 82 Resolving Ambivalence (Part 3) The mistakes you're making that trap you in the cycle of over-drinking
What do you think is the hardest part of quitting drinking? Most of us assume that declining the invitation to drink requires massive amounts of willpower. And that staying sober will feel like trying not to cough…which means there's no way we'll be able to resist the urge forever. So you delay the announcement because you assume it's going to be difficult. You genuinely want to be successful, which requires you to wait for the "right" time. Meanwhile, you stop making the effort to cut back. Sobriet...
2023-11-14
21 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Ep 81: Resolving Ambivalence (Part 2) The secret to curing alcohol use disorder
Why do you think that it's so hard to stick with your intentions to "drink like a normal" person?" You may assume that your "off-switch" is broken or that you have an "addictive personality." Or maybe you secretly fear that you really are an alcoholic. Regardless, this is a frustrating and embarrassing problem that feels beneath you. Most people try to escape the cycle of over-drinking by taking a break to reset your tolerance or even swearing to never drink again. Because we assume that if alcohol is the problem, then so...
2023-11-14
19 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Ep 80 Resolving Ambivalence (Part 1) Why you still want to drink and also want to stop
How do you handle the emotional whiplash of knowing you should stay sober for a while but also feeling like that's unrealistic? Ambivalence feels like climbing up to the high dive only to chicken out and refuse to jump. And then telling yourself it's not that bad and you like learning lessons the hard way–Cheers! Or secretly thinking it's actually so bad that you probably should go to rehab. Either way, you can't deal with this today. Which temporarily solves the problem until you wake up in the middle of the n...
2023-11-14
09 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
4 questions that transform the way you react to life
How often do you spend hours, days, weeks (ok, maybe months) ruminating on negative stories? Thinking and talking about the person or situation that is making you feel angry, hurt, disappointed, frustrated or concerned? Objectively, you'd probably agree that is not time well spent. After the intial sting, you're really just pissing off yourself with the story about the sting. Dwelling on the past sucks the joy out of your present and attracts more of the same in the future. In this episode, I give you four questions to ask yourself in times o...
2023-02-27
22 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Alcohol is not the problem--plus free discovery call with me
I was afraid of sobriety. Because I knew alcohol was just a distraction. I was mostly drinking to cope with an unhappy marriage. A stagnant career. I was bored with friendships that had run their course. My kids were leaving the nest and I didn't know what to do with myself or my time. I didn't know how to be alone. It felt good to quit alcohol. But sobriety didn't solve my problems. And it felt really childish to define myself by how much I do or don't drink. Are you struggling with...
2023-02-20
28 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
The connection between diet culture and substance abuse and how to use nutrition and targeted amino acid therapy in recovery. With Chris Engen
Chris Engen is board certified in holistic nutrition and has an advanced certificate in recovery nutition coaching. In today's episode, Chris and I do a deep dive into the beliefs that lead to disordered eating and subsequent substance abuse. We blast the myth that being "messed up" is what gets us the diagnoses of generalized anxiety disorder, panic attacks, depression and bipolar disorder and more. In reality, we're deficient in the neurotransmitters that allow us to feel connected, grounded and positive. Chris explains that the way we feel in any given moment or phase of ou...
2023-02-06
1h 11
It's Not About the Alcohol
I had a drink
After trying on many beliefs about my relationship with alcohol, I've adopted the belief that I can drink anytime I want. Because it feels much better to think I don't want to drink than I can't drink. My recovery is no longer from alcohol. I have healed my brain and my body from years of abuse. My recovery now is focused on getting over my habits of people-pleasing and perfectionism. I am becoming a woman who listens to her intuition and trusts herself to manage the consequences of her own actions--both good and bad--without beating herself up.
2023-01-30
24 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Change Your Mind About Alcohol--The Challenge Returns
The motivation to drink less is usually pain. The problem is motivation to avoid pain disappears. The less you drink, the better you feel and the more likely you are to go back for another round. The reason the idea of sobriety feels like a denial of self and well-being is because drinkers view drinking as part of their identity. Also a coping strategy. So they ignore the evidence that life would be better without alcohol and focus on minimizing the pain. The solution is to reframe the problem. Stop trying to change the way yo...
2023-01-23
29 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
How self-compassion and kindness lead to success--with Ana Weisberger
After moving to New York City and achieving the American dream, Ana felt empty and disconnected. She tried many things and eventually went on a 2-week meditation retreat. In the silence, she realized that her life was filled with noise and chaos. So she divorced her husband, quit her job, rented a house on a beach and embarked on a new career as a life coach. After the initial burst of energy that comes with making big life changes, she realized that she still struggled with a lack of motivation and self-defeating coping skills.
2023-01-16
41 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Recovering out loud--with Makini Campbell
In today's episode, we're holding space for Makini Campbell's "coming out" about her status as a woman in recovery. For her, speaking on this podcast marks the beginning of a new chapter. Serving as a highly empathic teacher and professional counselor to poverty-stricken communities, neglecting herself in the efforts to help others left her feeling broken. Like a mouse stuck in a maze. Makini shares how asking for help in a safe space gave her the courage and support she needed to heal. She now sees her triggers as a call to practice self-care. Because...
2023-01-09
35 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Shame comes from the "sinner" mindset
Growing up in the Christian church, I'd been indoctrinated with the sinner mindset. That I was born unworthy. That my physical needs and desires are evil. And so I believed that if something felt bad or wrong, I was bad and wrong. I thought shame was the voice of God--moving me away from the voice of false knowledge. Grab my free reflection exercise on how to process shame @ https://recoverwithcolleen.com/freebies Read this essay: https://recoverwithcolleen.pages.ontraport.net/Library/The-Sinner-Mindset If you like this episode and would like me to...
2023-01-02
11 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Confessions of a raging codependent
In this short and sweet episode, I read an essay published last year about coming to terms with the role codependency played in my first divorce--just in time to avoid a second divorce. Read this essay on my blog: https://recoverwithcolleen.pages.ontraport.net/Library/Confessions-Raging-Codependant If you like this episode and would like me to dive deeper into the topic of codependency, speak up! My email is colleen@recoverwithcolleen.com or join my private Facebook group and leave me a comment --> Recover with Colleen Follow me on Instagram Recover with Colleen...
2022-12-26
13 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Ep28| Awakening the brain after addiction
Addiction is a gradual narrowing of focus. Fewer things have the ability to make you genuinely happy. And over time, more of your thoughts, feelings and behaviors become automated stress responses. But being "stuck" in a habit is an illusion. The brain is plastic--constantly changing. A basic awareness of how the brain responds to stimuli allows you to direct the changes in your brain instead of remaining at the mercy of subconscious urges. In this episode, I'll show you how to interrupt the "shame and blame" response that perpetuates addiction so that you can move...
2022-12-19
49 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Ep27 | How to shift into solution-based thinking
Our brains' operating system is language-based. Words have meaning and therefore define your reality. Becoming aware of your default thinking patterns allows you to choose thoughts that you want to think on purpose. You can actually reprogram your brain to respond intelligently. In this episode, I teach you how to shift into solution-based thinking without falling prey to toxic positivity. Be prepared to take some notes, as I include a list of cautionary phrases to avoid and helpful questions to ask yourself that will result in productive action. Click here to join my private Facebook...
2022-12-13
40 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
How to know what you really want
Most of our desires are not our own. They come from cultural and social expectations of what success and happiness looks like. That's normal. Nothing wrong there. But tuning into the EXPERIENCE of both the pursuit and the aquisition of what you want is the only way to set goals that give you a sense of purpose and meaning. When I changed my goal from "having" a financially viable coaching practice to "creating" one, I started viewing obstacles as an opportunity to learn. What I really want is to feel like a competent and professional business woman...
2022-12-08
32 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Join my FREE change your mind about alcohol challenge
You know attitude is everything. If you think of sobriety as a punishment for bad behavior or a "break" from your real life, it's going to feel that way. Join me for a 5-day challenge starting on Nov 25 (Black Friday) to learn how to change your mind ON PURPOSE. Each day you'll get a small challenge that's easy, fun and not threatening. You do not have to quit drinking to participate. The goal is to expand your awareness and increase your motivation to take better care of yourself. You'll get free coaching with me if y...
2022-11-16
20 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
Ep22: How to stop being a victim
What does emotional sobriety look like in action? I had to put my money where my mouth is when my application to an expensive professional coaching program was denied. Evidently, wanna-be losers need not apply. The winds were sucked from my sails and my plans to create a successful business helping women in recovery were destroyed with a single email. And so, I cried. In this episode, I deconstruct emotional sobriety into two essential components and show you what it looks like in action. Have questions? Click here to join my private Facebook group for fr...
2022-11-16
20 min
It's Not About the Alcohol
It's not sugar that you crave
We blame sugar as the source of our cravings. But the real problem is emotional--feelings of boredom, distraction and apathy. Restlessness. Discontent--among other things. Eating sugar feels good for about 5 minutes. But the shame and guilt hit fast. You feel worse, not better. Overcoming sugar cravings requires big picture curiosity. What is your body really asking for? In this episode, I show you how giving yourself permission to pursue genuine pleasure is the first step to overriding sugar cravings. Have questions? Click here to join my private Facebook group for free coaching with me and c...
2022-11-15
35 min