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Phat Dabs In The Morning100 episodes and hundreds of dab hits laternormally i would have a lot to say about the episode but there's only so much we here at phat dabs in the morning can only put into characters for you to read on the intro. and we could not be happier and trust us more surprised than you that three bored stoners and a microphone committed to a podcast, let alone made it to 100 episodes. and yet here we are at episode 100 and believe us when we tell you it is still dab o clock muthafuckas. we haven't technically calculated the dab hits we have taken during these...2023-09-223h 15Phat Dabs In The Morninga stoner's spooky story and a campfire to light the blunt aka spooky season beginssummer by day and fall by night. yes yes it's that type of weather that lets you know the seasons are changing and that it's time to get yourself a hoodie or two before you end up sick. trust me you can feel that little chill in the air at night and with that means that our season has officially begun. cue one of us screaming it has begun like shang tsung in mortal kombat at this moment now. there we are. and with the crew ready to bring our own brand of fun to the season and on...2023-09-1938 minPhat Dabs In The Morningvillain still need a name for the segment part two aka how to trigger your audience in one villainbefore we even get to the villain this week, we here at phat dabs and your teller in particular had to pay their respects to the soundtrack of phat dabs one eliah nang. i could not begin to tell you what our music meant to me and the words spoken at the beginning of this episode could not begin to do your body of work justice. but i stand by the thank yous. thank you for the inspiration. thank you for the wonderful soundtrack to some of our lives. we still will never be able to thank you enough...2023-09-0519 minPhat Dabs In The Morningspooky season pregamingyes that's right with the summer coming to an end and with the fall winds sliding in with very little subtlety, it's time to bring an end to one season and welcome in our favorite season here at phat dabs in the morning. spooky season. yes yes we know that september comes after the summer, but gonna skip over that like cracker barrel skips other holidays to promote christmas trees after the 4th of july. why get excited about pumpkin spice everything when we can get right to making the pumpkin bong. we enjoy our halloween and our other...2023-08-253h 25Phat Dabs In The Morningbonus blunt episode: villain (name for segment in progress) also never let your weeb friend pick the anime you watchonce again we here at the phat dabs crew are trying something new with the content and seeing the fun we can have with a little challenge in our lives and with the fall season creeping ever so slowly to let you know of its impending arrival what better time than the end of the summer to throw some of this good shit at the wall and see what sticks. so here's a bonus episode project zero of your teller experimenting with this and quite frankly having fun doing it where we take a look at some of our...2023-08-1820 minPhat Dabs In The Morningpregaming gone too well and preparations for the spooky seasonwith the end of summer coming up with august sliding with everyone and their last minute attempts to get some fun in before it becomes that final countdown to the end of the year we here at phat dabs feel the need to just stay inside while the fall season seems to be creeping in during the evenings just to let you know that hey i'm coming through in due time. the hidden sesh village is always a wonderful place to enjoy a good laugh and a good hit and what better time than now to pregame for the...2023-08-044h 12Phat Dabs In The Morningyou know we all used to make our barbies scissor each otheroh no don't just sit there and listen to this episode and act like it's just mandy who used to do that to their barbie dolls, fuck y'all. while we sit here and smoke and reminisce about other deviant things you used to make your childhood toys do to each other, we also give our respect to the barbie movie that just released for being the success it's becoming and mocking the guys out there who really feel a certain type of way about this movie. is it really gonna hurt you to let the ladies have this one...2023-07-283h 18Phat Dabs In The Morningbecause sometimes life is like a telenovela, and telenovelas are hellat the very least that is what the phat dabs crew has gathered from watching a couple of them. we may not always know what's going on but we are always completely invested. as someone who grew with the ridiculousness of soap operas in the eighties when i should have been watching sesame street or whatever fucking kids show that was popular at the time, i was watching all my children general hospital and whatever my mother was into at the time. however as ridiculous as this shows were scripted to be, real life and the internet are always...2023-07-212h 04Phat Dabs In The Morningshow us how far you'll simp but don't use your parents credit card to do itthat's right, this is part of a public service announcement that we never thought we would have to do, but with the public beating of a 16 year old in an internet diner thanks to spending all of his parents life savings on a video game we thought that this was a necessary announcement to make. we are being serious when we tell you this ladies and gentlemen that video games plus your parents credit card equals you being on life support. you steal your parents credit card you best be prepared to square up and except the beatings that's...2023-07-143h 26Phat Dabs In The Morningthree bored stoners and the rising humidityBecause it's not always the heat it's the humidity that will get you and with it getting past the 4th and the bbq and fun with explosives the humidity has started to kick in and with that the hidden smoke village with the air conditioning has become the ideal place for the phat dabs crew to be. don't believe us huh??? well you try to take a jaywalk in this heat and see how well that works out for you. the dehydration high isn't a good look for anyone trust your bowl mates on this one. but while we...2023-07-072h 58Phat Dabs In The Morningbad submarine jokes and bear sexyou read the title correctly. both of those things in the same sentence may not make a lot of sense to you, but continue on with the episode and the description and it still probably won't make a bit of sense to you. it doesn't to us we promise you that. well let's start off with the phat dabs crew going into current events and having nothing but jokes for the five billionaires who decided to find the titanic and ended up in bikini bottom. oh there's jokes. so many jokes. for those who might be offended by the...2023-06-232h 58Phat Dabs In The Morningdown the reddit hole and back againit's getting a little hotter out there don't you think??? well if it's any consolation like an elder used to tell me when the heat starts to get to that temp between scorching and hell's gate that it's not just the heat that it's the humidity that you need to worry about. and we here at phat dabs in the morning are already quite concerned with the level of madness people have shown before the really humid months kick in. it makes our just chilling here in the hidden smoke village much more justified, nothing but mist and marijuana...2023-06-1655 minPhat Dabs In The Morningpublic service announcement, sesh inside todayno seriously, have you been outside in the past few days. since the wildfires in canada and all that comes with that coming through the air and just making the days a nightmare to navigate through your daily routine, it has come to the crew here at phat dabs in the morning that the safest place for us to be is right here inside the trading post and with the air conditioning on and the banger heating up and bowls being packed. we are not certain if the smoke from the hidden sesh village now is from us or...2023-06-093h 04Phat Dabs In The Morningsometimes the pregaming does too much sometimes the dabs be too phat and somewhere there's ghost storiesyes. yes we can admit it. sometimes during our pregaming sessions before we hit record, we might be too ready to get on and be silly. we just may a little higher than we anticipated before we touch. sometimes the conversation before we hit record will be completely out of left field. it really do be like that sometimes. because for a lot of this episode the dabs decided to take us where it wanted to go despite our terrible attempts at protest for somewhere else. in the meantime we decided to take a look at ghost stories from...2023-06-022h 52Phat Dabs In The Morningwelcome back to the valleymy oh my it is good to be back in the valley once more. while we here at phat dabs in the morning thoroughly enjoy our air conditioning and the trading post we at now, i mean really tom nook is taking his time getting that milk, i can't keep lying to his kids anymore. but that's another story we technically can't tell at this time. as much as i am living my best life chilling and playing tears of the kingdom, something inside just kept calling to me to come on home just once more for the once...2023-05-3126 minPhat Dabs In The Morningcoming live from the green boxwith the weather getting nicer and the impending heat and humidity of the summer coming soon, we here at phat dabs in the morning decided to take you back to when summer actually meant something to most of us, and that was when we were kids. back when your teller was a young gen xer and his parents were more than happy to let him roam around outside without supervision, it is always fun to reminisce on those fun times you had when you had a bike and free reign of various neighborhoods. when you parents refused to see...2023-05-193h 22Phat Dabs In The Morningcelebrating mothers and parking passesyeah it's been that kind of week. your teller won't front with you tonight. haven't been really feeling his best this week and just having the feeling that this week feels slightly well, off. it started with going to get the phat dabs for this episode and attempting to traverse washington dc with a pack of menthol cigarettes and the potential danger that comes with that yet we are digressing quite a bit lades and gentlemen vai and voe alike because mother's day is right around the corner. that's right the day where mothers get celebrated by going to...2023-05-122h 34Phat Dabs In The Morningthe following episode was brought to you by the word worldstarbecause with the weather heating up, it only means one thing. summer madness will be approaching soon. much sooner than i would like to imagine sometimes but it's coming. heat rises and common sense just evaporates for the season. and while the rest of the world may lose their minds in the heat this summer, your favorite bowl mates and mine will be here on the island chilling smoking and coming up with some more of that good shit you tune in for. we may have talked about people who can or can't smoke with us on many an...2023-05-053h 38Phat Dabs In The Morning44 fucking years yeah i'm as surprised as you areyes that's right you are not misreading. your eyes are not deceiving you. you are not that high right now. you might smoke weed but you can read. but yes the number you read in the title is absolutely correct. your teller done made it to 44 years of age on this mortal coil and trust him when he tells you he is as surprised as you are. considering he was so certain he wouldn't make it to thirty or beyond that once he reached that threshold decided to live his life a little bit more. hell there wouldn't be...2023-04-283h 21Phat Dabs In The Morningepisode 420guess what day it is!!!! guess. what. day. it. is. yes indeed it is the most wonderful time of the year if you are a smoker. it is your day. oh that's right. it's your day. treat like mother's day or father's day where the only thing you want done for you is to be left alone with your weed and your hobbies for the day and the time to enjoy both. so once again and one more time, smokers and stoners, it is your day. and with it being our day, did you think for one second you...2023-04-214h 37Phat Dabs In The Morningyou did good nintendo. you did goodyes that's right this is one of those rare times i won't have to give nintendo the side eye when it comes to their movies, at least for now. i honestly couldn't think of any other way as a fan of this series than to take some time out of my smoking schedule to give a review of this movie and for the ones who get mad at the old heads in the theater please be mindful that they probably went through the original and you should really let them have this one. a real must see for either...2023-04-1110 minPhat Dabs In The Morningwhat would you do for some crab rangoon???according to one of our bowl mates, quite a bit. what will this person do for some crab rangoon??? unless you tune in and perhaps possess some of that aforementioned crab rangoon, the world may never know. yes from the intro on, we are just having quite the time getting away from the real world here at tom nooks trading post. and believe you me ladies and gentlemen given the way humanity has been acting about some of the most trivial matters, the trading post is the right place to be. i mean people are really getting mad over...2023-04-073h 36Phat Dabs In The Morningcrack rocks college confessions and sexual tension between amputeesyou should really be high for this episode. if the title alone doesn't make you want to take a hit just to make sure you're reading it correctly, do you really know the bowl mates??? but that's right choke on a hit and clear your vision because while none of those words make sense at all in the order they're in, all you have to do is listen to the episode and it will all make sense. no it won't. it really won't. yet it will be funny as shit the whole way through with sammy sam and your...2023-03-313h 29Phat Dabs In The Morningthe real world, tom's trading post or reality shows you should be high when you watchthe trading post has been quite live lately and once again no apologies will be in order to anyone who felt offended by the anime we watched last episode. just be glad we got all the bad ones out of the way so we can get back to the good ones next time. but also sometimes at the trading post we also get high as shit and watch some terrible reality shows. from the 90s on, reality shows have shown just how far we've come or fallen depending on your point of view. we will be going with the...2023-03-262h 32Phat Dabs In The MorningWhy??? Because Japan that's whyso we see you made your way back to the sesh. we haven't changed our plans on kicking back and watching some good anime while the good green and the phat dabs burn. it is what we do here at the trading post after all when we decide to not be turning up. while earlier you hear of some of your teller's favorite couples, this episode we decided to temput our fate tonight. allow your teller to elaborate on this one. while we have been having a hot streak here when it comes to first episode first impression anime editi...2023-03-172h 58Phat Dabs In The Morningyou have weed and funimation to thank for this oneyeah in case the intro didn't give away what we doing here at the trading post this time around, just how much do you smoke??? what you smoking??? you sure it's something you should be smoking with the rest of us?? I'm pretty certain it ain't. i'm pretty sure it isn't. while we take a look at what you have to make sure whether you can actually smoke with us or not, we're here just chilling and watching some anime i the trading post this week. and because your teller just can't leave well enough alone when it comes to the...2023-03-1642 minPhat Dabs In The Morningour bowl mates back and we done took over the islandhey now hey now our bowl mates back. was that corny??? possibly. i'm high enough and happy right now that none of what i'm typing actually matters right now. why you may ask??? because somewhere on a jaywalk on day around the island we found our bowl mate the gorilla grip goth herself sammy sam and we cannot be happier to have her back at the sesh. we missed our nigga and it was back to the old times of just a wonderful sesh with the mic on. we go through so many random subjects for you this evening but all...2023-03-032h 49Phat Dabs In The Morningcoming live from tom nooks trading postoh yeah you presumed we were playing when we said were dipping from the valley and going to find tom nook and move to the village??? you really thought we were playing didn't you??? didn't you??? where's that shame lady from game of thrones when you need her??? your assumptions justify her being here this time. go head take a walk and let her say shame for a while in the meantime we shake our heads at you. shout out to kk slider for the intro and he has been such a wonderful neighbor as well. he always slides through...2023-02-243h 26Phat Dabs In The Morningnext stop insert village name from animal crossing hereyes that's right. you heard it correctly and most importantly you heard it here first, we here at the phat dabs in the morning crew are leaving. yes indeed. due to the fact that everyone has decided to lose their minds and with everything else rising outside of our fucking wages, we have decided to find our boy tom nook and take gig with him and take one of his fixer uppers with no interest and just due our broadcasts from there from here on out. my nigga kk slider gonna hook it up and everything is gonna be okay...2023-02-193h 10Phat Dabs In The Morningsomething for the lovers in all of us valentine's night editionoh you thought you weren't gonna hear from me sometime today??? you thought your teller wasn't gonna slide through on valentine's day without a story or two to throw your way??? well allow me to tell you, you were right. almost. let your teller be honest with you for a moment if he can, it's hard to be romantic in this day and age. there's a term for everything and none of them seem to be in your favor at all. it really ain't sometimes. another subject for another time tho we ain't here for that tonight. why?? being that it's...2023-02-1528 minPhat Dabs In The Morningso we have a belated birthday today and we also read fanfics better than velmayes that's right before we get back to hating on that show that really shouldn't even bother being acknowledged ever again, we have to celebrate the belated birthday of my cohort and co conspirator one of the cornerstones of the crew and my nigga mandy coming onto 24 on the responsible stoner shit. celebrations and cannabis aside, we bring up random things about valentine's day that really make no sense to us. for example, have you noticed just how toxic the romantic rhythm and blues music you were probably created to actually is??? have you ever listened to the lyrics of...2023-02-121h 59Phat Dabs In The Morningso we did a show tonight feat goodbrothert and goodbrotherdanwe were here for a countdown but we decided to do a show. we gave the original gerudo the night off tonight with a phat jay and the freedom of a well earned jaywalk. that is our story and we are sticking to that. in the meantime while he travels the realms or wherever the fuck he decide to go this evening, we saw the laptop and the microphone and the new episode button and one thing led to another and well here you go. and as long as we have all these things in our reach we decided that...2023-02-0550 minPhat Dabs In The Morningand three tokes we mean uhm three takes lateryeah yeah that's it right there use take three. yeah that's right we had three tokes we mean takes damn it we don't mean to keep doing that. but as we were saying, three tokes goddamnit we mean three takes of the intro later and we are back on our beautiful bullshit you know and smoke with us for and with 23 quietly letting us know it's safe to come outside and observe the world as we know it, we felt more inclined to look back at our younger selves and wonder just how the hell did we get away w...2023-02-033h 04Phat Dabs In The Morningwell that was a quick one wasn't it????Yeah, so due to some other events we had to attend to this evening, we here at phat dabs decided to do a quick episode just to have a little fun because sometimes just like when you need to smoke before you have to go to family events, sometimes you need a chuckle or two before you move on to other shit in the evening. but don't worry we still got a little buzz and a little silly shit to have a little fun with today. starting and going mainly with ganja and games in general. mainly video games tha...2023-01-121h 09Phat Dabs In The Morningenhancement smokers and entering the new year be like......shhhhhhh. nobody say a thing. happy new years to all of you by the way. don't mind us we just trying to slide into this new year as peaceful and as quietly as possible given the beginning and the end of last year. can;t really blame us for exercising the slightest bit of caution now can you??? not to worry tho it's some of the only caution we will use this year. meanwhile in the just smoke it you studios your favorite bowl mates pack a bowl or two and recount some of our favorite and least incriminating in som...2023-01-064h 05Phat Dabs In The Morningsomewhere, two stoners, in a studio far, far awaycue the star wars theme and the floating text across the screen, okay okay use your imagination for the latter part while your teller types this shit out. for the end of the year coming up much much quicker than either one of us expected, we here at the phat dabs crew implore you all to go into 2023 as tentatively as possible this year. keep your feet on the plastic partition. don't make too much noise. don't touch a damn thing. we are not going into the new year guns blazing we come in looking before we leap this year s...2022-12-233h 48Phat Dabs In The Morninggoing in one direction and then the other and everywhere in betweenwith the holidays in full swing, we here at phat dabs are fully aware that while this time of the year is all about goodwill and togetherness and family, not everyone out there is fortunate enough to have either. the reasons may vary but christmas may not be the holiday for everyone. and to be honest with you vai and voe alike, your teller isn't feeling very in the christmas spirit. now don't get me wrong, your teller may be feeling a bit ucey yet the feelings of warmth happiness and goodwill to all have seemed to have eluded me...2022-12-1649 minPhat Dabs In The Morningtake a hit take a pull it won't take too long we shouldn't smoke that it's a gingerbread bongwow. just wow. that sounded much much better in my head but i've already written it and i'm not about to press backspace. we don't believe in backspace in intros like this. but nonetheless we took a week off to get some things in order but now we're back on our holiday bullshit where we ruin some of your favorite christmas specials by adding our own real world logic and commentary to rudolph a charlie brown christmas and a few others tonight in between that and defining what exactly qualifies as a christmas movie these days and apparently it runs...2022-12-094h 48Phat Dabs In The Morningso your teller took a jaywalk in gotham this eveningcrime alley to be exact. i didn't stay that long i promise you. you wouldn't be hearing this episode if i had stayed longer i promise you. gotham city is not some place you want to stick around in one place long in trust us. but due to the fact that 2022 has decided to just fuck with our childhoods as well when they took away the voice of batman kevin conroy from us, i felt compelled to slide through with a good doink and enough time to pay my respects to one of my favorite voice actors of all time...2022-11-2940 minPhat Dabs In The Morningintro to the holidays (as nice as we can introduce it)well now that thanksgiving is in the rear view the tunnel vision focus all now turns to christmas which we will be honest with you isn't our favorite holiday but the time of year around it can be wonderful if you like that sort of thing. we do tho. we have quite a few viewpoints on this season and before we really start going in on this season, we might as well have little reprieve from the madness with our good friend, well not really good friend, but good partner for an episode like this, reddit, who once again ne...2022-11-2754 minPhat Dabs In The Morningstoner icks and gecko dicksone is a term for pet peeves we stoners may have from time to time the other is the result of one of your bowl mates looking on the internet at three in the morning. either one makes for an interesting episode. mostly because we took a phat diamond before we took to the air today. don't give us that look sometimes that's how pregaming goes here during a sesh in the valley. however one phat diamond took your favorite bowl mates to the shadow realm. we was high. i mean really high. so high we forgot that thanksgiving is prac...2022-11-184h 06Phat Dabs In The Morningoverlooked holidays and three bored stonersyes that's tight now that halloween has come and gone and christmas is right around the corner, i know there's a couple more holidays before christmas but be honest with yourselves ladies and gentlemen you and commercials in general don't give two damns about any other holidays when christmas is right in your line of sight. and with so much time before christmas shows up we have so much shit to say about christmas before the day actually arrives and most of it won't be kind. speaking of the holiday season with god of war ragnarok about to dominate yo...2022-11-114h 03Phat Dabs In The Morningbeta year tests and blown highs the asshole editionotherwise known as how quickly can humanity blow your high while you try to record an episode. yes that's right what started out as testing something out to see if i would be interested in adding on some content during the lunch break with some good shit from reddit and it turned into a bout of blown mind at the extent people will ignore how ain't shit they are and how quickly utter stupidity and selfishness in said people will blow your high when you read their bullshit i never had to hit my piece so often during a r...2022-11-0257 minPhat Dabs In The Morningseasons change holidays come holidays go the bowl mates do neitheroh that's right with the seasons about to change and the year going out of its way to as over with as quickly as possible the phat dabs crew laments ever so slightly over the incoming quote unquote holiday season. halloween will be upon us soon and we still got to look at some random creepy shit while the dabs were phat and smoking. what kind of freaky shit you may ask??? well hold on and we'll tell you shut up. we bring a little of s courage the cowardly dog's freakiest and most terrifying villains, simultaneously making it a sh...2022-10-283h 23Phat Dabs In The Morningbeauty and brutality on your lunch break part two (go ahead smoke some for this one)yes that's right part two. when i say to be continued i mean to be continued. what can i say??? i'm a man of my word. and with that we bring more of good brother justin ardren and his work from his new book disrespectfully yours throwing in the beats of one lofi geek to bring the beauty to the chair to the face brutality justin brings with his poetry. it's a wonderful juxtaposition and quite beautiful if you have the eyes for it. and judging by the shade of crimson in you retinas at the moment i think i'm in...2022-10-2738 minPhat Dabs In The Morningmalcontent marijuana and monster fuckersquite the title yes i know but yeah we here at phat dabs in the morning, your favorite bowl mates to listen besides your own, have quite the gamut to run for you fine folks this evening. first and foremost we take a critique as well as an issue with this year's haunt presentation from one king's dominion. oh king's dominion we were gonna let slide the face that you basically profiled us for our face paint but we know better than to argue. nevermind the fact we saw costumes and face paint in there but we digressing right now...2022-10-213h 25Phat Dabs In The Morningbeauty and brutality all in one episode so roll your best for this onebeauty and brutality you say???? yes indeed we here at phat dabs in the morning enjoy both of these in high abundance and your teller is thrilled to bring you a potent combination of both for those of you who smoke on your lunch break and listen to us at work. if you don't why aren't you??? digressing. questions to ask a later time and also remember i'm high as fuck when i write these things. digressing. how are both going to be represented on this special episode you ask??? a simple equation for you out there the smooth sounds...2022-10-1958 minPhat Dabs In The Morningbehind the scenes pregamingyeah that's right we got a webcam and decided to have a little go with some scary games as well. and we also learned a thing or two while packing bowls and heating bangers getting ready for the episode for the evening. our first attempt of this starts with little nightmares and i mean attempt since we went into this game kinda blind and having no idea what we;re doing but then again that can be said for with the camera as well but we still had a little fun with it. it never hurts to see what we...2022-10-1448 minPhat Dabs In The Morningspooky shit extravaganza aka look dammit i'm highi know the title is kinda cringe right now but once again dammit i'm high when i write these intros out. high as jotun taint. i swear to whomever up there right now i take a look at some of these titles and intros and wonder to myself just how fucked up i was before i decided to write some of these. did you really think i wrote these sober??? did you really??? you're serious right now???? shame on you but then again this is a beta year after all you still got a little it more time to get ac...2022-10-144h 01Phat Dabs In The Morningquiet storm shit aka something for the ladies to ride your man to sleep to so you can smoke something to yourselfoh yes you are listening to the quiet storm here for one night only here on phat dabs in the morning. yes indeed it may have gotten a little warmer here in the valley today but that doesn't mean a damn thing when then clouds hit around the break of dusk. you with your one and only bunning up and getting as the cool breeze slithers through the window and slides up your spine. and if you listen closely enough in between heart beats you can hear the rain hit the sill. the quiet storm is rolling in. smoothing it out...2022-10-0756 min
Phat Dabs In The Morningback on our beta year bullshityes that is correct you have heard correctly. we here at phat dabs in the morning have considered this first year to be our beta year. our test drive, three bored stoners throwing a bunch of shit at the wall to see what sticks and what entertains us. and for our first year, we've been having fun and coming up with a lot of fun things to talk about and just wing it sometimes. yet as things progress towards 23 we do think more and more about adding more to the content and trust us more will be coming soon as th...2022-09-304h 15Phat Dabs In The Morningthree bored stoners and the changing seasonsyes that's right ladies and gentlemen your favorite bowl mates have just realized that the year 2022 is trying its hardest to be over as quickly as possible and we here at phat dabs in the morning could not agree more with that sentiment. i mean fuck we just realized that the end of september is almost upon us which means here in the valley that we get the obligatory two weeks of autumn and pumpkin spice everything before we get down to the get down. getting down to the real shit. that spooky shit. oh yes we also in case...2022-09-234h 24Phat Dabs In The Morningconfessions with your chest or reddit confessionals audience choiceno seriously audience choice on this one. i'm too high after reading some of these confessions and really not certain where i wish to go with the title for this bonus episode. both of them sounded appropriate for the early morning exploration of people on reddit feeling the need to get things off their chest and some of the weight off their shoulders. some of these require a trip to a trusted friend's house and some of these required a laugh track with the amount of sitcom hijinks going on. a nice equal balance i believe. what all these stori...2022-09-2158 minPhat Dabs In The Morningyou will ask yourself during this episode if you are high enough for this shit, and this answer will probably be noso yeah we went through the gamut with cringe coming from all sides from so many fandoms and there was so many we could cover and only so many we could go through without blowing our high. and trust me when your favorite bowl mates tell you you should be as high as possible for this one. considering we go through an obscene amount of cringe inducing topics along with some wonderful things and vibes to balance out said cringe. you're gonna need a couple thick blunts and a few phat dabs on deck for this one. we start wi...2022-09-163h 33Phat Dabs In The Morningcall of the coffeehouse (sometimes that coffee be calling me)so yeah fascinating tale for you tonight. with the seasons changing, trust me you can feel the autumn creeping in the air, especially when you on a paraglider. we had functional pot head shit to take care of today, so your teller had time to take nice jaywalk with the autumn air creeping in. the only issue was where to take one???? not really feeling that picky and ready to just land this damn thing, i could catch the faint scent of good coffee slithering through the scent of segregation and sweat that normally permeates the area around it, and...2022-09-091h 17Phat Dabs In The Morningnot safe for work no i mean seriously you gonna need your earbuds for this onewe cannot stress this enough for this episode. if you listen to nothing else we tell you ever in your life, listen to this shit with earbuds in or when you completely alone. we are not even going to attempt to apologize for the subject matter this week. we really not. so if you decide to ignore us and get yourself in trouble it will be entirely on you. get it??? got it??? outstanding. now we get quite down and nasty in this one we get into our favorite porn matters from types to the top sites to look at to...2022-09-023h 11Phat Dabs In The Morningtales for the twenty five to life crew. this one's for the serversheats banger. preps dab. hits dab. yes yes ladies and gentlemen it's been one of those kind of nights. one of those where i get to question and witness firsthand just how far humanity has fallen. otherwise known as being a server. it's been a while since i've been on here to show some love and share some tales from the server life. there's always some wild shit to tell when you out on the floor. they usually end with a drink and a story that usually ends in get the fuck outta here. if you know you know. but for my...2022-08-2857 minPhat Dabs In The Morningresponsible stoner shit or at the very least as responsible as you can be for stonerswhichever one you wish to go with tonight. yeah it is a rather early episode but as the seasons start to change and the kids go back to school those poor bastards. the kids don't even get to technically finish the summer anymore. but your teller digresses. you can feel the seasons begin to change and with that it's gonna be a rather busy time of the year. people got jobs and bills and schedules and whatnot and there are a lot of bridges we may have to cross scheduling wise and with the following months coming up we have s...2022-08-262h 40Phat Dabs In The Morningtonight's episode is brought to you by the phrase you fucked upand believe you me, there are a lot of ways that people have fucked up this episode. shall we start with the obvious one first??? i don't see why nah. tonight, you fucked up by going on reddit and posting your mistakes for the internet to read, thereby giving a storyteller stoned off that sweet sweet chiva things to read and chuckle for the amusement of their audience. we won't go into the individual ways these people fucked up, you have an episode full of them to listen to and come up with your own reasons for how bad they...2022-08-191h 29Phat Dabs In The Morningall the random nonsense you can handle in one episodei mean i'm being quite serious when i tell you this. we go on quite some trips this episode and being that it has been quite a newsworthy week. i mean for those who still watch the news. jennette mccurdy writes a tell all book that we at phat dabs in the morning highly recommend everyone read if nothing else than to wonder which tell all will be next. you just you can't have one person telling it all without someone else having their own story to tell and somehow that takes a left turn to tommy lee's third drum...2022-08-123h 02
Phat Dabs In The Morningone out of three isn't really that badso we learned a couple things this episode. well for one we got the guy in the couch awake for this episode. it's always nice to have guests to the sesh. we realized that thanks to the new dlc available today, we all are terrible at mario kart when we play together. it was a learning as well as a bonding experience. in the middle of that we decided to compare the avatars aang and korra. what we came up with may surprise you. perhaps not as much as some of your childhood or favorite game coming to live action m...2022-08-052h 37Phat Dabs In The Morningso here's what i am a need you to doyeah i'm about to test your comprehension skills for a second. indulge a gerudo for a moment this is going to go somewhere fascinating. i assure you. now here's what you need to do. you listening??? tremendous. get your bowl. grab a grinder. oh you don't have a bowl you have blunt well then crack that shit open. now then where was I?? Ah yes here we go. now grab that weed. grab the shit with the most ridiculous doesn't even sound appealing name you have available. i know you got more than one fancy bag with you don't play with me...2022-08-0256 minPhat Dabs In The Morningmanifesting billion dollar lottery winners and messing up your childhood one tier list at a timeoh yes with the lottery up to a billion dollars, which by the way is way too much money to give one human being, we manifest whatever we have to get them winning numbers on our tickets. what do act like you ain't out there at your local 711 trying every superstition you've ever heard for lottery numbers looking for that come up. we here at phat dabs would like you to know we understand we're doing the exact same thing. in between that we are judging your childhood with a double header of tier lists going on nicktoons and dis...2022-07-293h 18Phat Dabs In The Morningphat dabs in the morning was brought to you today by the word violenceyeah for an episode that started recording at 4:20 today we decided to choose to watch a lot of violent things today. not certain why we decided to get onto worldstar shit today but that's where the dabs take us. oh we go through quite a few things this episode folks. we have some deathmatches from japan and goddamn those are still hard to watch all these years later. we also observe some shit that shouldn't make any sense nor exist but do. such as russian slapping competitions and pillow fighting championships. yes these things actually exist. look them up if you...2022-07-153h 24Phat Dabs In The Morningthree bored stoners and some weeb shitwait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait. it's monday. right??? it's a few days early. well, yeah about that. due to some circumstances beyond our control, tune in to find out which ones, we decided to just watch some anime and smoke some weed. we got a few suggestions to check out a few we otherwise wouldn't have bothered with and apparently there are a lot more to take a look at than i realized and since the first couple of episodes are always a gauge of whether an anime is actually worth your time or not, what better...2022-07-122h 12Phat Dabs In The Morningsix months and many seshs (i think that's plural for sesh) lateris that plural for sesh??? is it es or just s???? i think it's the latter. yeah we'll go with the latter. nonetheless, welcome to our six months later episode where we thank all of you who listen to this silly ass podcast. join the sesh this time since it;s mainly us being the premise you know and love, three bored stoners and a microphone. not knowing where we might take the conversation and that's what you listen to us for. we sit once again on our beavis and butthead shit as we take you through some of our fav...2022-07-083h 32
Phat Dabs In The Morningwith all due respect to adult swimnow before all of you decide to not listen to us anymore, hear us out. we at phat dabs love adult swim. grew up on it. came of age on it for some of us. it was always great to smoke to and watch and even though we feel the best era of adult swim was when you had the following line up. american dad, futurama, family guy, yes that s correct all in this order, two episodes of robot chicken, two episodes of aqua teen, and then anime until two o clock. rinse repeat wake up to distorted nation...2022-07-013h 16
Phat Dabs In The Morningwell let you teller be honest with youhe feels kinda bad for this episode. not for the content mind you. the stuff you will listen to is top notch i promise you. and yes as i address in this episode i know i said i would do this around 4:20 but hey the way your teller sees it, it's always a better late than never situation. yet somehow i really didn't feel a good night. i felt disjointed and i really only hope i did their work justice. it just didn't feel like my best night on the mic. yet needless to say it was a learning experie...2022-06-2859 minPhat Dabs In The Morningtime really does fly when them dabs kick in don't they???yes yes indeed they do. sweet mother of fuck they do. we managed to give folks a lot in this amount of time as well. we here at the phat dabs crew celebrate juneteenth by showing mandy and the gorilla grip goth sammy sam (yes that is correct, you must say the whole thing now like a pimp named slickback. i am contractually obligated to do so), two of the hood classics lean on me and life.(just kidding, we ain't got no contracts).well we were getting through life but amazon prime had other ideas rotten bastards.(we woul...2022-06-244h 01Phat Dabs In The Morninga long trip through the nineties or beavis and butthead shityes we did run a bit long on this episode. we are quite aware of that. sometimes that's how the dabs gonna have you when you reminiscing over the decades past and thinking logically over the birth of reality shows. we do jump from reality shows to hbo and all other sorts of fuckery from the nineties which was the ground zero for a lot of thisshit you see today so many things you overlooked until you got older. such as how cartoon themes back then really slapped. take a trip with us down memory lane and have your childh...2022-06-173h 54Phat Dabs In The Morningeither we fuck up your morning or your boss doeswe at least entertain you. we hope we do. and that is what we hope to do with this little morning bonus episode that is actually happening in the morning for all the functional pot heads who listen to us who need to have a good laugh during the misery of a hard days work and with your storyteller off in the winds from wherever this sheikah tower takes me next, he decided to get back into reading reddit stories, with a special request from the gorilla grip goth herself we go into the today i fucked up category and...2022-06-1659 minPhat Dabs In The Morningphat dabs behind the scenes (is there such a thing as behind the scenes on a podcast???)I mean is there????? no i'm actually curious now. i would like to know. nonetheless i like that title so i'm a stick with it. but what you're listening to basically is just kicking back and how we come up with our ridiculous ideas for the present and future. hell we play a pretty fun game of would you rather and i your teller have a confession to make. what might it be??? you just have to listen to find out. what other plans might we have for the future??? what is dungeons and dab rigs coming soon??? you know what...2022-06-111h 32Phat Dabs In The Morningno seriously i hope you got you best shit for this oneif you don't why don't you??? get your best shit and roll it up fire that banger or nail up and pour yourself something nice and sit back because your teller is bout you take you on a good one tonight. we bring in some of my good shit with amani murphy and some of his good shit and i really should get some more of justin shit on here as well but we'll get to that as well and it's some of that lovely open mic night shit putting on that quiet storm movie in a world voice ov...2022-06-101h 12Phat Dabs In The Morningi hope you got your best shit lit for thisit's always fun to read poetry on phat dabs my own and others included so i know i couldn't turn down a request to read some quality stuff from longtime fan and friend of the show amani murphy. he has a book adaptoid which you will hear some of his best stuff and here's hoping i did your work some justice good sir. but don't worry your original gerudo will be back with the rest of the phat dabs crew you know and wish to smoke with on thursday and trust between your teller's work and amani's work you wi...2022-06-0757 minPhat Dabs In The Morningwhen you let the dabs lead the convothat's right folks like we always do as three bored stoners with a microphone we just let the dabs lead the way when it comes to what we talk about. however we did come with some subjects for ya'll to enjoy tonight along with our random nonsense. we bring out our favorite ships because let's face it why the hell not and then just to show how wonderful a planet that we live on as well as how quickly the crew needs to leave this planet, we look up fetishes and disgusting things that we would sincerely hope no on...2022-06-033h 36Phat Dabs In The Morningwe here for a long time as well as a good timeso yeah it's a pretty long one this week here with the phat dabs crew. what can we say tho time flies when the dabs hit and you're in good company. we had our special girl on the couch rachel with us for this episode and it is always fun to have familiar faces return to the sesh. we go through quite a lot this episode considering given the shape the world is today there are many other places we would rather be and we go through a few of them. the cul de sac from ed edd and eddy...2022-05-272h 59Phat Dabs In The Morningprose parables and phat dabsbecause you need something else to take your mind off the madness of the world and your faith in humanity dwindles with every breath, we have got you with enough thc and time on our hands to entertain you through whatever may be ailing you today. today we're back on that quiet storm voice tip and i promise you ladies and gentlemen vai and voe if you know you know. your original gerudo would not lie to you on this one. coming in with enough readings for an open mic night with special reading of nobody likes a cockblock. hop...2022-05-251h 23Phat Dabs In The Morningputting on that good voice and talking that wonderful shityes that is correct ladies and gentlemen. your original gerudo decided to break out that good voice, that smooth jazz 105.9 shit. that quiet storm 96.3 WHUR voice. if you know you know. figured id break out that good shit to read a few poems from a good brother of mine justin burkhardt who is a talented poet and always showed respect as well as appreciation for my work as well. so as a friend and a fan it was a pleasure to do and i just hope i did his stuff justice. nonetheless it's always nice to get on here and so...2022-05-241h 01Phat Dabs In The Morningan episode about touching the gooch (also about nothing)i always wanted to use a seinfeld reference sooner or later. but yeah we had an episode about pretty much nothing. sometimes you don't need a few subjects. sometimes it really is just three bored stoners and a microphone turning on the mic and lighting up these dabs and just letting the dabs lead the conversation. you just never know what we will come up with. we have terrible weed names this episode. advice for women all over out there. touch the gooch. i think that's how you spell gooch. i can always be wrong but don't feel like spell ch...2022-05-202h 52Phat Dabs In The Morningwith all apologies due to absolutely no oneso yeah i attempted to read kingdom hearts erotic fan fiction. because i had to see. the key word in that first sentence you just read being attempted. well' as you'll hear me try to read some of this erotica and while you hear my faith in humanity and my side eye at fandoms in general widen, you'll see how far i got into this before i had to just call it quits. well you'll hear. fuck it, you get the idea. the first few minutes of this recording should have been a harbinger of things to come. let this be...2022-05-1555 minPhat Dabs In The Morningso we remembered to hit record this timeso yeah there's that. we somehow also got into reading fanfiction and erotica. yes that's right ladies and gentlemen we rolled up some good shit got some phat dabs ready turned that 70s porn music on and decided to get grown and sexy with our readings this evening. well at least we thought we were getting grown and sexy. trust me as you listen along you will understand why so many dab hits and bong rips were necessary for some of this shit. we would like to apologize to absolutely no one in the fan bases we might offend enter...2022-05-132h 37Phat Dabs In The Morningrevenge stories or as i like to call it i never turn down a request from a friend and a fanthat's right. a fan requested this and shout out to all the listeners in the texas area i know we got some artists and vagabonds out there showing us love and we appreciate you. and per your request, your teller grabbed a glass of ciroc the dark ciroc at that and a good couple hits and got your stories. some good some aneurysm inducing but nonetheless there is always a good time to be had. and also, before i forget to tell you stay tuned for reddit episodes from mandy and sammy sam as well and as always don't forg...2022-05-0959 minPhat Dabs In The Morningthe time is dab o fuck we forgot to hit recordyeah so sometimes you forget your format. sometimes you forget the game plan. sometimes you forget what you're supposed to be discussing. hell we fucking forgot to hit record the first time. and also you forget that that shit doesn't matter at all because it be like that sometimes. it's three bored stoners and a microphone and that's all it needs to be sometimes. the weather done got nicer in the gerudo valley and we out here just vibing and talking random life shit this episode. we still got more reddit stories coming soon from mandy and the gorilla grip go...2022-05-062h 00Phat Dabs In The Morningtales from the server life ie welcome to the animal kingdomit's getting warmer out there. weather heating up and the nights getting lovely. but while it;s heating up outside you can always find your original gerudo chilling somewhere. once again i have to say ladies and gentlemen that i am enjoying doing this reddit readings and sharpening my sword so to speak figuratively and i honestly hope you're enjoying what you're hearing. but tonight this one is for the servers. all ya'll in the server i have safe spot for you. we still got the chiva chats on deck. that's right chiva chats. it's a thing. a nice little ga...2022-05-051h 18
Phat Dabs In The Morningrevenge stories and stoner thoughtsor payback parables and chiva chats???? I don't know I'm high as fuck with a microphone and reddit stories to read. hopefully i'm getting better at these and enjoy challenging myself with something new to do while still learning more of my craft to see how far i can go. anyway tangents aside i hope you're at least entertained by the selection and if you have any requests for reddit stories hit us up and let us know. we take requests.2022-05-0351 minPhat Dabs In The Morningam i the asshole or am i on reddit looking for answers to questions i should already knowback again multiple nights on the reddit tip. taking a break between hitting phat dabs and jaywalks through time and space to practice once again on the reddit reading tip. and tonight i bring to you the am i the asshole edition. or as i like to call it looking for answers you should already have formed because i'm a keep it real for you some of these situations you should already know better and you already know the answer. nonetheless these are always a good read and hopefully you're enjoying them hearing me read them to you. i know...2022-05-0154 minPhat Dabs In The Morningred eyes and reddit storiesbonus content. YEAH!!!!! it's your storyteller sliding tehrough with a little experiment involving me getting high as fuck and reading stories from reddit to you. never mind that most of my important matters involve me getting high as fuck but hey another matter for another episode. nonetheless i had a little fun doing this and would like to improve a little here and there. but we all have to start somewhere. and here we are.2022-04-3056 minPhat Dabs In The Morningbirthday shit part twowell last birthday episode we celebrated mandy birthday. this time we celebrate your host the original gerudo special day. we talk about movies back in the day that made us feel a certain kind a way with regards to pixar having a monopoly on your feelings during a movie. we also apologize with regards to the 420 episode. well we got high and apparently recording in the woods is more of a hassle than we realized. still a fun try tho. we are also lobbying for a show on adult swim or actually just a bump on adult swim. we fucks...2022-04-292h 07Phat Dabs In The Morningfor me it was my first rocky horror screening, but for tim curry it was tuesdayyes that's correct the phat dabs crew took your teller to his first screening of tim curry's regular tuesday routine. shout out to the crew that put that together i think sammy sam told me the name of the group i was high. in between that and attempting to critique 90s videos and having a difficult time of it. who knew the 90s were so tough to nitpick???? bringing in the spring with that good shit you've come to expect and hopefully mother nature will have taken her meds and have her mind made up. plus stick around later on fr...2022-04-082h 13Phat Dabs In The Morningnapalm grenades and n word momentsyou're watching when keeping it real goes no no no that ain't it. this is a nig wait wait wait three of the podcasters are white they can't even say what the fuck will smith was having at the oscars. oh yeah we talk about will smith and the oscars probably the only time we will talk about either on the show and all the other random things you have come to expect from the phat dabs crew all the while we hotbox the the studio with a joint called a napalm grenade. we at paht dabs have never pass...2022-04-012h 19Phat Dabs In The Morningmunchie runs and mario kartyup that's the title. you read that correctly. we out here doing our regular comedy routine and all of a sudden we went on a munchie run. these things happen. don't act like it doesn't. but then we're back on our bullshit and back to answering questions we thought we answered before but because we all smoke too much we probably did. absolute shout outs to all who have listened through our first quarter of this season. we appreciate ya'll listening and hope you've been entertained throughout and we hope you've gotten used to us since it's the year of phat...2022-03-252h 31Phat Dabs In The Morningfunctional pot head shitso yeah sorry for last week and for being late this week but hey we here at phat dabs do have regular gigs. sometimes it fucks with the flow of things but not having a roof over your head to record would fuck with us worse so thank you for understanding and missing us for even a week. nonetheless we place real world logic on video games and talk about our worst experiences at the worksite. always fun to vent about your worst jobs. shit if you really feel like it tell us about your worst lob experience on spo...2022-03-181h 59Phat Dabs In The Morningblack pills bonchon and all that beautiful bullshityeah the title pretty much says it all this week. we got a public service announcement from mandy. we shout out the that 70s show crew who decided to listen to us out in wisconsin and sell fez on the fact that he needs a better class of smoker to hang around. we just saying fez you can do better than foreman and his crew.2022-03-043h 36Phat Dabs In The Morningforbidden west or elden ringso yeah i had a decision to make between games but then we might all just be fucked up in nuclear war at any given time now. so consider this like a seinfeld episode. an episode about actually nothing really. all that's missing is a laugh track and also motherfuck xfinity for their slow ass internet at times. 2022-02-253h 16Phat Dabs In The Morninggame nightthis episode we try some things that are a little different. how so???? well first we discuss a current event for starters with the kanye and kim situation and how none of this will end well for anyone involved. possibly one of the only times we ever bring up something current or involving those two again so take it in for posterity's sake. we also break out the wii and have some fun with wii bowling. we also learned we suck with cameras and need to practice with it a little more. nonetheless it was a fun first try. come jo...2022-02-182h 03Phat Dabs In The MorningValentines and story timeOr in other words when your favorite niece asks you for a favor and uses that exact word to ensure she makes it happen. nonetheless this is a trip through two of her favorite stories that her and her girl wanted to hear. hopefully these two enjoy and the rest of you as well as it will be EXTREMELY rare for this to happen again 2022-02-1414 min
Phat Dabs In The Morningbirthday shitThis episode will be shorter than usual yet it doesn't skimp on the shit you came for. we have on air celebration for our co hort and co conspirator amanda or mandy for those who listen coming with that random shit you smoke to and like, and then we go to eat since we dressed up and i will not let this shit go to waste we look good dammit.2022-02-111h 42
Phat Dabs In The Morningtentacles and disappointmenta few questions before you come into the sesh tonight??? how much of a tolerance do you have for random things once the dabs kick in???? care to find out??? come sit at the sesh for episode three. one day we'll have a format. one day we'll have someone to keep us on track. it won't be today tho.2022-02-032h 52Phat Dabs In The MorningPre gamingA slight introduction into the creative process behind the phat dabs in the morning crew. and if you're as good a guesser as i think you are you can probably guess what it is. so yeah we decided to get high and record our pregame. come join in on the sesh. we'll get to a regular episode sooner or later.2022-01-282h 54
Phat Dabs In The Morningintro episodejust a little intro just to show you who you'll be smoking and listening to form here on out. we promise we get better with time and more weed2022-01-212h 28