Shows
Failing Motherhood200: My #1 Mantra + Mindset ShiftHappy 5th Anniversary of Failing Motherhood!Welcome to the LAST episode, #200.If there's one thing I will be known for, let it be this mindset shift. And in this episode, I don't just explain it, but I share a clip from a coaching call where we apply it in real time to a common frustration.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:How to recognize when you're having "first thoughts"Creative ways to problem solve struggles with cleaning up their own thingsHow to take your power back + no longer feel...2025-05-2021 min
Failing Motherhood197. 3 of 3: Therapy, Marriage Counseling, 1:1 Coaching + Virtual Parenting Programs/MembershipsWelcome back!This is the 3rd of 3 episodes breaking down the vast array of parenting resources we have at our fingertips. Today we’re talking: personal therapy, marriage counseling, one-off or 1:1 parenting coaching, and virtual parenting programs / memberships.For each, I break down the family that resource is BEST for, the benefits it provides, the unique Pros and Cons of utilizing that support vs. another, and ultimately, for some, the way they fall short. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:What a therapist will never tell youWhy 1:1 coaching actually tak...2025-04-2939 min
Failing Motherhood196. 2 of 3: OT, PCIT, Play Therapy + Seeing a PsychologistWelcome back!This is the 2nd of 3 episodes breaking down the vast array of parenting resources we have at our fingertips. Today we’re talking: Occupational Therapy, Parent Child Interaction Therapy, Child Therapy (play therapy) and seeing a Psychologist.For each, I break down the family that resource is BEST for, the benefits it provides, the unique Pros and Cons of utilizing that support vs. another, and ultimately for some, the way they fall short. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:When play therapy would most benefit your childWhy PCI...2025-04-2241 min
Failing Motherhood195. 1 of 3: Parenting Content, Books, Courses + ClassesWelcome to my VERSUS series!This is the 1st of 3 episodes breaking down the vast array of parenting resources we have at our fingertips. Today we’re talking: parenting content, parenting courses & books, and in-person parenting classes.For each, I break down the family that resource is BEST for, the benefits it provides, the unique Pros and Cons of utilizing that support vs. another, and ultimately for some, the way they fall short. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:Why it’s extra hard to implement strategies from a bookT...2025-04-1540 min
Failing Motherhood194. Setting Boundaries without Pressure + PanicWhat does it even look like to set + hold good boundaries?Boundaries can feel like an illusive mystery. Our preconceived notions of what we should be doing can create really rigid metrics for succeeding or failing, when in all actuality, there’s often no right or wrong!Today’s discussion includes validating the intention to “find the line”, why boundaries isn’t a binary but rather a spectrum, and the mindset reframes needed to be more effective and successful while still allowing for exceptions to the rule. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:2025-04-0818 min
Failing Motherhood193. Accidentally Inviting the Outcomes You're Trying to AvoidWell that backfired!When we parent out of fear, our short-sighted reactions can add fuel to the fire. This can create unintended consequences, like MORE helplessness, MORE sibling resentment, and MORE attention-seeking.In this episode, I cover where this starts, two extremely common examples, and what to do instead.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:The Boomerang Effect: What you push away, comes back full forceA parallel to the movie- Monsters, Inc.The "Veruca Salt" mentality we're all afraid ofDON'T MISS:How the best...2025-04-0120 min
Failing Motherhood191. Silly over SeriousDoes it ever feel like your strong-willed child SNAPS and turns into someone else entirely? Like an alter ego took over?You’re now walking on eggshells trying to diffuse a bomb before it explodes. There are two wires, which one do you cut?Choose SILLY over SERIOUS. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:A situation in college you’d have handled in a similar wayThe ramifications of doubling down on seriousnessWays to inform your mindset that boost your patience and compassionDON'T MISS:Several examp...2025-03-1834 min
Failing Motherhood189. Intentionally IndulgeWhat do bad mornings, clingy birthday parties, fighting playdates and candy on the way home from school all have in common?Instead of doubling down to invite the meltdown or giving in to avoid it… there’s a better way!These are all situations where you, as the parent, can intentionally indulge. Tune in to learn how. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:Ways to shift from being reactive to proactive, getting one step ahead of your childWhy “intentionally indulging” works so wellHow to compromise to get mor...2025-03-0421 min
Failing Motherhood187. 7 Ways to Beat the Bedtime BluesMost strong-willed kids struggle with sleep, so if bedtime feels like neverending pulling teeth at your house, join the club!While I'm always going to advocate for nuance and individualization, confidence comes from having a diverse set of tools in your backpocket, so this episode is here to help you have a few more "tricks" up your sleeve.Here's to a shorter bedtime routine for the kids and more time for revenge bedtime procrastination for the adults! :)IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:Why you might need to...2025-02-1828 min
Failing Motherhood185. Going Beyond Good IntentionsCan you imagine setting a New Years resolution, watching healthy living content and going to a class where they teach you why you should exercise and expecting to lose weight without ever working out?NO! We know getting stronger requires taking action.In the same way, working on your parenting requires implementation, not just intentions.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:Ways immersive learning experiences transform parenting skillsWhy it's impossible to grow stronger while "malnourished" and what to do about itThe role of structured support in achieving parenting goals 2025-02-0421 min
Failing Motherhood182. 5 Top Tips for Making Weekends Easier on EveryoneIf all your weekend plans seem held hostage by your strong-willed child’s mood, you’re not alone.In this episode, I name the extra challenges you face on the weekend and specific strategies to tackle them for good, unlocking actual freedom and possibilities to be spontaneous or just enjoy each other and relax! IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:Why what we think we want isn’t what we actually wantTwo goals to go into every weekend withHow to stop power struggles before they startDON'T MISS:Powerfu...2025-01-1427 min
Failing Motherhood180. It's OK to Walk Away + What to Do When You Can'tWe all dread it - the inevitable meltdown of EPIC proportions. It’s survival mode, and no one is immune.In this episode, I share why I disagree with typical advice (and even Dr. Becky) on how to manage these meltdowns/outbursts, why it’s OK to walk away, and what to do when you can’t. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:An analogy to help illustrate your responsibilityWhy staying WITH your child might actually backfireHow to “leave” the room without physically leavingDON'T MISS:Mantras to adopt that...2024-12-1727 min
Failing Motherhood179. 7 Steps to a Successful Holiday with a Strong-Willed ChildThe holiday season is upon us filled with changes, anticipation, late nights, unfamiliar meals, sweets, high emotions, extra tasks and stress.Your strong-willed child will understandably have an even harder time navigating all of this unpredictability, triggers, and lack of routine.Tune in to hear my 7 steps to a more successful holiday season for the whole family! IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:What to say NO to and whyCritical mindset shifts that allow you to prevent rather than reactHow to manage the inevitable jealousy and lack of etiquette/appreciation2024-12-1025 min
Failing Motherhood177. How to Tag In/Out with your Partner with Dignity + CompassionNo couple goes into parenting as a perfectly united front. Every parent runs out of steam, hits a wall, and loses it from time to time. Good parents ask good questions like “How can I help my partner when things are going off the rails without stepping on their toes?”Before you hop in the car and start parenting extra challenging behaviors in front of extended family this holiday season, have this important conversation with your partner to set you both up for much more success. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:The...2024-11-2622 min
How To Get Your Toddler To Sleep In A Big Kid BedToddler Meltdowns, Tantrums, BIG Emotions | Interview with Danielle BettmannToday is a special episode. I will be discussing toddler meltdowns, tantrums, and the BIG EMOTIONS young kids experience with parenting coach, Danielle Bettmann, from Parenting Wholeheartedly.Danielle is a parenting coach who helps the parents of strong-willed children like their kids again. 💗 She is the founder of PARENTING WHOLEHEARTEDLY and has a podcast called FAILING MOTHERHOOD, full of great parenting tips and relatable stories.So if you deal with big emotions from your child at all times of day, not just bedtime, listen to this episode.2024-11-1945 min
Failing Motherhood176. The Antidote for Shame + GuiltThere is something ALL parenting books are missing. You cannot fake it. There is no substitute. It is transformational.…and it’s the critical antidote to guilt + shame.If you’ve tried EVERYTHING under the sun- this might be the reason why you’ve stayed stuck. And it’s more needed than ever before. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:What my daughter’s violin teacher did that changed the game for me as a parentThe real reason why my coaching wasn’t helping familiesWhy a healthy sense of skepticism is w...2024-11-1921 min
Failing Motherhood175. NO REGRETSOne of my kids just received a diagnosis. It was 10 years in the making because school was not seeing any of the symptoms we saw at home until now.In light of this milestone for our family, I’m sharing a personal reflection of my own parenting. As parenting is often filled with confusion, overwhelm, guilt and regret… here are things I do NOT regret.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:A vulnerable audit of my own parentingWhat to do if your child is too young to be diagnosed with ADHD but...2024-11-1208 min
Failing MotherhoodVOTEElection day in the US is in 21 days (Tuesday, November 5th). Early voting has already began! As parents, our kids are counting on us. Every vote counts, especially in the smallest races and ballot initiatives, shaping the world our kids grow up in.I do not expect you to agree with everything (or anything) I share here today and that's okay. I just want you to vote!IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:Things you can't know about your family's futureA memory I'm afraid to admitConcepts that are allowed to...2024-10-1515 min
Failing Motherhood169. The Problem with ObedienceWhen other kids at the park instantly listen to their parents, it can make even the most well-intentioned parent feel self-conscious (and a little jealous).Isn’t that the goal? A child who listens without hesitation?Let’s talk about it.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:The longterm ramifications of putting obedience on a pedestalWhat to focus on and aim for insteadA question to ask yourself to reflect on your approachDON'T MISS:The limiting factor that makes all of this extra challenging with strong-willed kids!2024-10-0116 min
Failing Motherhood167. "Hold the Football": A Behavior Modification ToolIn today's quick episode, I break down a key facet to behavior modification I've been supporting a lot of clients with lately! It’s not a surefire guarantee toward cupcakes, rainbows and butterflies - but it is necessary shift in your communication that doesn’t contribute to a crash and burn affect.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:2 Examples of effective behavior modification outside of parentingWhat the "Hold the Football" Tool is and why it's criticalHow to apply this tool when a sibling is being pestered in the carDON'T MISS...2024-09-1712 min
Failing Motherhood165. After School Restraint CollapseIt's that time of year, when your strong-willed child keeps it together all day at school then lets it all fall apart with you the second they get in the car.I packed this episode full of perspective, mindset shifts, tangible strategies and preventative measures to equip you with the "game face" you need to tackle this transition.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:How to meet them where they're at while still setting boundariesWhy saying "Stop." "Don't" or "Calm down" won't work and what will insteadQuestions to ask instead of "how was...2024-09-0321 min
Moms Overcoming Overwhelm | Decluttering Tips, Declutter, Systems, Routines for Moms, Home Organization150 // Decluttering the Unrealistic Expectations of Motherhood - with Danielle Bettmann from Parenting WholeheartedlyImagine this scene: You’re shopping in Target with one child pulling on your leg and the other grabbing random items off the shelves, wailing, “PLEEEEASE Mommy can I have this?” An elderly woman in the same aisle smiles at you and says, “You’re going to miss this, dear! The days are long but the years are short!”
Or imagine that you buy a parenting book about a discipline approach that your sister-in-law raves about, but when you try it at home it just makes you feel uneasy. But it’s all you’re seeing on your Instagram a...2024-08-2934 minMoms Overcoming Overwhelm | Decluttering Tips, Declutter, Systems, Routines for Moms, Home Organization150 // Decluttering the Unrealistic Expectations of Motherhood - with Danielle Bettmann from Parenting WholeheartedlyImagine this scene: You’re shopping in Target with one child pulling on your leg and the other grabbing random items off the shelves, wailing, “PLEEEEASE Mommy can I have this?” An elderly woman in the same aisle smiles at you and says, “You’re going to miss this, dear! The days are long but the years are short!”
Or imagine that you buy a parenting book about a discipline approach that your sister-in-law raves about, but when you try it at home it just makes you feel uneasy. But it’s all you’re seeing on your Instagram a...2024-08-2934 min
Failing Motherhood164. Surviving Until or Without Qualifying for a Diagnosis [Danielle on Moms Talk Autism]A special gift for you this week, courtesy of our friends at Moms Talk Autism. Not only did they join me for last week’s episode, but they interviewed me on their show and were kind enough to share it with our audience so I could share it here.My work specializes in helping families who are struggling with Neurodivergent traits in their child but don’t have a diagnosis yet or whose child does not meet the criteria for a specific diagnosis.In this episode of Moms Talk Autism, I share what trai...2024-08-2758 min
Moms Talk Autism PodcastFailing Motherhood w/ Danielle BettmannFellow podcaster and Parenting Coach, Danielle Bettmann, is our guest in this week’s episode. Danielle helps parents of strong-willed children meet their kids’ deepest core needs, improve behavior, and find new levels of patience. As a mom of two, Danielle is passionate about eliminating shame from parents’ vocabulary, solving power struggles, and transitioning from school to home and back again. Danielle specializes in helping families who are struggling but don’t have a diagnosis yet or whose child does not meet the criteria for a specific diagnosis. We loved chatting with Danielle and hope this conversation is a helpful...2024-08-1957 min
Failing Motherhood162. They Don't Hate YOU, They Hate...Have you ever been told, "I HATE YOU" by your child? Or even worse "You're not coming to my birthday party!"Parents of strong-willed kids (esp. mom) can become the scapegoat for the anger they harbor, and it can lead to parents hearing things like “You don’t love me”.This often causes a spiral into permissiveness to avoid conflict, anxiety, and/or a lot of self-doubt as a parent.Spoiler Alert: They don’t hate you. They hate feeling crazy and all alone with their BIG emotions. And we do too.2024-08-1316 min
Failing Motherhood160. Cherish Every Moment . . . OR NOT.Parents are inundated with messages from complete strangers on the Internet and in person reiterating "You're going to miss this!" "It goes SO fast!" "The mess can wait!"The problem is... sometimes the mess can't wait, you might NOT miss this stage, or there's so much more to look forward to!Let's stop forcing undue pressure on parents and instead, consider the hope and gratitude in a more longterm approach.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:A viral post and a well-written rebuttal The lies I believed and what I b...2024-06-1826 min
Failing Motherhood157. They know better than this!You're 100% right. They do know better. These are smart kids we're talking about here, nothing gets past them!So, if that's true, why are they still hitting, pushing, screaming, or whathaveyou? Explaining the rules for the 1,456th time isn't going to solve anything.What will? Tune in with curiosity.IN THIS EPISODE, I SHARE...The truth behind two incredibly common misconceptionsThe painful sting of regret that's oh, too familiarHow it feels when the tables have turnedDON'T MISS:Why it's problematic to tell your ch...2024-05-2822 min
Failing Motherhood155. 5 Lessons in 5 years of EntrepreneurshipFailing Motherhood is 4 years old and Wholeheartedly is 5! We’re taking this opportunity to reflect on the last two years and the lessons I’ve learned - some easily, some the hard way.Entrepreneurship is such a similar journey to parenting - you don’t know what you’re getting into exactly, it’s much harder than anticipated, it requires a lot of self-work and growth, and it’s riddled with self-doubt and imposter syndrome. You have to take it one day at a time and make new decisions with every piece of new information.Take the...2024-05-1434 min
Failing Motherhood153. 2 Mistakes Well-Intentioned Parents MakeThis week we’re taking parenting tips from Hello Fresh!In ways you may not have realized, being a parent is sort of like working in customer service. In our case, the customer isn’t always right, but the way we handle conflict may invite our child to ask for our manager! :)Your goal as a parent is to build credibility and trust in your “brand” rather than bad reviews! As I reveal the two mistakes well-intentioned parents make, you'll be invited to reflect on your default reaction and formulate a balanced response instead.2024-04-3029 min
Failing Motherhood152. GLOW UP: Feel Better In Your Body Without Changing ItFor the past 6 months I’ve had the opportunity to work on my relationship with my body- no procedures, no weight loss, no supplements, just selecting and being more mindful of how I’m dressing myself and how it makes me feel.In today’s episode I break down what kicked off the journey, the milestones along the way, and the absolute game-changer that sealed the deal!This episode is for you if you know your appearance has taken a back seat to your kids, and more self-love is on your list this season....2024-04-2330 min
Weaning It: A podcast for toddler nursing moms6. Is My Nursing Toddler Strong-Willed? With Danielle BettmannStrong-willed children have a deeply rooted need to feel connected and in control.
In the toddler breastfeeding relationship, this can create a recipe for burnout as you try to meet your child's demands for milk. Learning strategies that can help you stay connected while also keeping loving boundaries is key to finding a balance in the relationship.
Danielle Bettmann is a Positive-Discipline certified parenting coach who empowers parents to crack the code of their strong-willed child's personality, meet their deepest core needs to improve their behavior, and find new...2024-04-181h 02
Failing Motherhood147. The 3 Types of Parents of Strong-Willed KidsWhich one are you? Which one is your partner?Not only does the second half of your parenting life begin when you understand you're parenting a strong-willed child, but your self awareness sky rockets when you realize you're a Worrying Warrior.Your next step is to evaluate whether you're parenting with a "Just tell me what to do" parent or an "It is what it is" parent.In this episode, I break down each of these three parenting approaches, the motives behind their actions, and wedge of divide that grows between parents that f...2024-03-1928 minHow To Get Your Toddler To Sleep In A Big Kid BedHow to handle toddler meltdowns, tantrums and other BIG emotions - with Parent Coach, Danielle BettmannToday is a special episode. I will be discussing toddler meltdowns, tantrums, and the BIG EMOTIONS young kids experience with parenting coach, Danielle Bettmann, from Parenting Wholeheartedly.Danielle is a parenting coach who helps the parents of strong-willed children like their kids again. 💗 She is the founder of PARENTING WHOLEHEARTEDLY and has a podcast of her own called FAILING MOTHERHOOD, full of great parenting tips and relatable stories.So if you deal with big emotions from your child at all times of day, not just bedtime, listen to this epi...2024-03-1245 min
Failing Motherhood145. Don't Insist on an ApologySay you're sorry. "I'M SORRY! GAAHHH!!" they ROAR from the other room. Lessons were learned, right? Often when parenting strong-willed kids, the messages we're trying to send, the skills we're trying to model and the lessons we're trying to teach get lost at sea in a battle of control and BIG emotions.Instead of checking the box to make ourselves feel better, I'm breaking down why I don't insist my kids apologize and what we do instead.IN THIS EPISODE, I SHARED...Why especially strong-willed k...2024-03-0519 min
Failing Motherhood143. How TO (and NOT to) Use Timers with Strong-Willed KidsHave you found using timers at your house to be HIT or MISS?Either it helps tremendously or meltdowns ensue? What gives?I'm breaking it all down on today's episode- both the DO's and DON'T's so you understand exactly what's needed to make your use of timers as effective as possible.Not only do I share key insight into reducing whining, clinging, and complaining, but visual timers are your friend, and it's all about semantics so your child sees the "what's in it for me" factor!IN THIS E...2024-02-2021 min
Failing Motherhood140. Challenging Common Fears When Raising Strong-Willed KidsWhat if it's not what you think it is? Two weeks ago I listed the 11 most common fears/challenges experienced by parents of strong-willed kids. In this episode I address each one.The work is in NOT letting these fears take hold of the way you parent, but rather gain awareness and understanding while you get to the bottom of what's really going on.Listen to that episode first, then circle back here for the freedom to zoom out and let some fears go entirely.IN THIS EPISODE, I SHARED...2024-01-3024 min
Failing Motherhood138. The 11 Most Common Fears/Challenges of Parenting a Strong-Willed ChildHard, frustrating, exhausting - is an understatement. Your lived experience as a parent of a strong-willed child is one many can't understand, including yourself sometimes!There are very real dynamics, fears, and perceptions that make showing up moment to moment extremely difficult, and it's impossible to solve for them without being able to name them first. This episode is going to give words for what you haven't yet had words to describe.IN THIS EPISODE, I SHARED...Proof you're not the only one late night Googling and stressing ab...2024-01-1624 min
Failing Motherhood136. Decluttering TOYS: A Guilt-Free Guide to LESSTis the season for under-stimulated kids, over-stimulated parents, an influx of gifts and stuff everywhere! If you have the urge to throw everything away right now, you’re not alone!If you’d love to have LESS at your house but feel guilty for getting rid of perfectly good (educational even!) toys, this episode is for you.Today I’m sharing the benefits of less toys for you and your kid(s), your goals to set out and attain, and I break down the steps to take to go through things one shelf at a ti...2024-01-0249 min
Failing Motherhood132. How to Be the CALM to Your Strong-Willed Child's Storm: Moving Beyond Theories to Application with Omaya + AndrewParents to a 4-year-old strong-willed son and an almost 2 year-old daughter, Omaya + Andrew are here to share the biggest mindset shifts they internalized that made it possible for them to go from constantly splitting up their family to avoid setting off their strong-willed child to watching their sibling relationship thrive and taking both kids hiking as a solo parent! They reflected on what they've done well to parent together as true partners, processing the information in real time and tagging each other out in the moment. But most importantly, they hope by hearing t...2023-11-281h 07