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Showing episodes and shows of
Dominique Dajer
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For Love of Recovery
Why am I still waiting for the other shoe to drop? Anxiety after a sibling gets sober
If your sibling is sober, or you’ve finally put those boundaries up, but you still feel on edge, you’re not alone.Many siblings experience lingering anxiety after addiction—even when life finally feels calm. The chaos may be gone, but your body hasn’t caught up.In this episode, Shahem McLaurin digs into what happens after the crisis phase ends: why your nervous system stays on high alert, how years of unpredictability create hypervigilance, and why “nothing happening” can feel unsafe. We also explore boundaries, trust, and learning to feel safe again in recovery—at...
2026-02-01
58 min
For Love of Recovery
Grieving the mother I never had: Alcohol, abuse, and recovery (with Marci Hopkins)
What does it mean to grieve a parent who is still alive—but was never able to show up the way you needed?In this episode, Marci Hopkins shares how childhood abuse, emotional neglect, and a parent’s addiction quietly shaped her relationship with alcohol—and how drinking became a way to survive grief she didn’t yet have language for.For years, Marci’s drinking didn’t look extreme or chaotic. It looked normal. It looked functional. It looked like coping.As many people enter Dry January questioning their own relationship with alcohol, thi...
2026-01-01
53 min
For Love of Recovery
“Is MAT swapping one drug for another?” How the right medication can make or break the recovery process
What if everything you’ve been taught about recovery is wrong?What if the thing your family fears —medication—might actually be the one thing that could help save your loved one’s life? You might recognize names like methadone, suboxone, sublocade, buprenorphine, and others.In this episode, we strip away the sugarcoating and talk honestly about how these work, and what exactly medically assisted treatment (MAT) is: what it does, why it works, and why so many families still judge it. We dig into the hard truths—how detox alone sets people up to fail...
2025-12-01
43 min
For Love of Recovery
Top 5 questions I get asked about my brother’s addiction & recovery (and what I wish I was asked instead)
“How’s your brother? How are your parents?” Sound familiar?If you’ve ever felt like people are quick to ask about the loved one struggling with substance use—but rarely ask how you’re doing—you’re not alone. Or maybe they jump straight into offering advice.I know that feeling well. In this episode, I’m answering the questions I get asked most about my brother’s addiction—and the ones I wish people asked instead.The ones I hear all the time sound like:“Do you think he’s ready for tre...
2025-11-02
21 min
For Love of Recovery
Top 5 questions I get asked about my brother’s addiction & recovery (and what I wish I was asked instead)
“How’s your brother?" "How are your parents?” Sound familiar?If you’ve ever felt like people are quick to ask about your loved one struggling with substance use—but rarely ask how you’re doing—you’re not alone. Or maybe they jump straight into offering advice.I know that feeling well. In this episode, I’m answering the questions I get asked most about my brother’s addiction—and the ones I wish people asked instead.The ones I hear all the time sound like:“Do you think he’s ready for tre...
2025-11-01
21 min
For Love of Recovery
Is rehab and "tough love" the best way to help them through addiction? (with Joanna Rudnick)
What does it really mean to love someone through addiction — and how do we move beyond the idea that rehab is the only way forward?The answer is rarely simple. We want to show up, to help, to protect — but sometimes our love feels heavy, confusing, or not enough.Joanna and I talk about the complicated love of siblings — the guilt, the hope, the heartbreak — and how stories like hers and mine can remind us that none of us are alone in this.In The Opioid Trilogy, Joanna brings these stories to life with unf...
2025-10-01
1h 00
For Love of Recovery
The glass child: Learning to live for you (with Alicia Meneses Maples)
What happens to the child who’s always told to “be good” while all the attention goes to their sibling? They grow up invisible. They become the Glass Child.In the third and final episode of our Parentification Series, I talk with TEDx speaker Alicia Meneses Maples, who coined the term glass child, about what it’s really like to be the sibling who carries the burden quietly. We go deep into:The crushing pressure of being “the good kid”Parents leaning on you like their therapistThe silence and shame of having no...
2025-09-01
1h 01
For Love of Recovery
The cyclebreaker: Breaking out of family dysfunction (with Kate Nichols)
What if the version of you that kept your family functioning isn’t the version you want to be anymore? You might have heard the term, “cyclebreaking” or “breaking generational trauma,” but what exactly does that mean and how do you know if you’re ready to change and challenge how you’ve done things before?Growing up in a family shaped by addiction, people-pleasing, and the urge to “fix,” I knew it was time to break patterns. In this raw and honest conversation, I sit down with Kate Nichols, a LCSW who focuses on cyclebreaking to talk about what th...
2025-08-01
53 min
For Love of Recovery
The parentified child: Why they're often the eldest daughter (with Whitney Goodman)
If you were the kid who held it all together—the one who comforted your parent, kept your sibling safe, made things feel normal when they absolutely weren’t—this episode is for you.In the first episode of our Parentification 101 mini-series, I sit down with therapist and author Whitney Goodman to talk about what it really means to be a parentified child—and why it so often falls on the eldest daughter.We talk about the invisible labor kids take on in families affected by addiction and dysfunction. The emotional weight. The unspoken expectations. The way...
2025-07-01
36 min
For Love of Recovery
Ex-cop in recovery creates hope on fentanyl frontlines (with Brock Bevell)
Brock Bevell takes us inside his journey—from working as an undercover cop to battling opioid addiction, and ultimately, to becoming a recovery advocate for the Mesa, AZ community.After a career-ending injury and medical retirement, Brock didn’t just lose his job—he lost his identity. He opens up about the mental health spiral that followed, his doctor’s flawed belief that cops are somehow immune to addiction, and the devastating moment he realized he had become the very person he judged while on the job..This isn’t a story about rock bottom—it’s a story...
2025-06-01
51 min
For Love of Recovery
Is harm reduction “enabling” addiction? Myths vs reality (with Sarah Laurel)
You've probably heard the myths: that offering housing, food, or money to someone struggling with addiction just “enables” them. That people using suboxone or methadone aren’t ready to make a “real change.” But what if those ideas are not only wrong—but harmful?In this episode, harm reduction advocate and person in recovery Sarah Laurel dismantles the most persistent misconceptions about harm reduction and addiction, and what it means to truly show up for someone you love. She helps us rethink how harm reduction can not only save lives—but relationships too.Sarah shares her journey th...
2025-05-01
49 min
For Love of Recovery
My brother's addiction: Learning how to be his sister—not mom
I used to think it was normal—expected, even—for older siblings to step in as a “third parent,” especially when addiction takes hold of a brother or sister. But the deeper my brother’s addiction pulled him in, the more I realized that the real change had to start with me.In this episode, I open up about my journey from being consumed by fear, anger, and shame to accepting uncertainty, practicing compassion, and learning to meet my brother where he is. If you’ve ever felt torn between detaching or staying connected, I’ll share the research an...
2025-04-01
22 min
For Love of Recovery
"My loved one is finally sober—now what?” Rebuilding relationships in recovery (with Janice Johnson Dowd)
When someone "gets sober" or begins their recovery journey, we want to believe everything will fall back into place. But the truth? Recovery is M E S S Y.Relationships don’t magically heal overnight. Trust isn’t instantly restored. And for families, the real work is just beginning.In this episode, Janice Johnson Dowd—author, social worker, and person in recovery—gets real about what it takes to rebuild trust and connection after addiction and the stories shared in her new book, Rebuilding Relationships in Recovery. She opens up about the lies she told...
2025-03-01
39 min
For Love of Recovery
"My sibling and I are estranged. How do I move forward?" (with Fern Schumer Chapman)
Sibling estrangement can create grief like no other, especially when addiction is part of the equation. In this episode, Fern Schumer Chapman, journalist and author of Brothers, Sisters, Strangers and The Sibling Estrangement Journal, opens up about her 40-year estrangement from her brother and the profound emotional toll it took on her. Fern’s story offers a raw look at the pain and complexities of sibling relationships affected by addiction. She shares how setting boundaries, in the face of addiction, sometimes means cutting ties—and the unique grief that comes with that decision. Whether you’re navigating your o...
2025-02-01
34 min
Living While Loving Your Child Through Addiction
EP107 Siblings Supporting a Brother or Sister Struggling with Addiction - Guest Dominique Dajer from For Love of Recovery
In this episode, Heather welcomes Dominique, founder and host of the podcast For Love of Recovery, which focuses on helping siblings navigate the challenges of having a brother or sister struggling with substance use. Together, they dive into the unique experiences that siblings face, which are often overlooked. Dominique shares her personal journey, the inspiration behind her podcast, and insights into the sibling perspective on addiction and recovery. The conversation explores topics like the pressure to be the "perfect child," the effects of stigma, how parents can better support siblings, and the emotional complexities of...
2025-01-17
40 min
For Love of Recovery
“Should I let them hit rock bottom?” Creating change using ITC (with Molly Sinclair)
Feeling torn between “tough love” and showing support? What if the answer is not choosing between helping or detaching, but finding a balance? In this episode, Molly Sinclair, takes us through her journey of navigating her mom’s, her brother’s, and her own addiction with empathy and boundaries. Molly explains evidence-based tools like the Invitation to Change approach, whether you should let someone hit “rock-bottom” and other insights to help you start the new year with clarity and compassion. This episode may help you: Decide whether Al-Anon/Nar-Anon, CRAFT, or the Invitation to Change is right for...
2025-01-01
36 min
For Love of Recovery
Navigating the holidays & family addiction (with Minaa B.)
Family addiction can bring holiday stress, uncertainty, heartbreak, and tension to what’s supposed to be a joyful season. If gatherings feel overwhelming as you're navigating a loved one’s substance use (especially a sibling's), you're not alone. Minaa B., licensed social worker, mental health educator, and author of Owning Our Struggles, shares how to set boundaries, prioritize self-care, and protect your peace amidst the chaos. Because even in difficult times, you deserve a peaceful holiday season celebrated in a way that works best for you. This episode may help you: Navigate complex sibl...
2024-12-01
46 min
For Love of Recovery
Homelessness, addiction & the power of connection (with Kevin F. Adler)
Ever wondered about the stories behind the people you pass on the street experiencing homelessness? The reality can hit close to home, especially when a loved one is grappling with addiction, mental health struggles, or the risk of losing housing. In this episode, we speak with Kevin Adler, author of When We Walk By and founder of Miracle Messages. Kevin reveals the powerful, often hidden narratives of those facing homelessness and highlights how the strength of relationships and reconnection can pave the way to recovery and stable housing. This episode may help...
2024-11-01
41 min
For Love of Recovery
Unmasking teen addiction & untreated ADHD (with Shelby Robbins)
Teen drinking or drug use may start off with curiosity or peer pressure, but it often goes beyond that. In this episode, we uncover the connection between undiagnosed ADHD and substance use—a surprising link that’s often missed but affects nearly half of adolescents in drug and alcohol treatment. Learn how to spot the signs of both conditions, and discover how families can support loved ones struggling with these challenges. We'll also provide practical tips for treatment, management and building strong support systems. This episode may help you: Bring clar...
2024-10-01
42 min
For Love of Recovery
The Bear: Sibling bonds, mental health + addiction (with Asha Hunter)
When a family gathering transforms into a chaotic battleground, no one leaves unscathed. Season 2 of The Bear took us beyond the chaotic kitchen of the restaurant and into the heart and home of the Berzatto family. In the emotional episode "Fishes," we witnessed the complex dynamics and strong sibling bonds of the Berzatto family during a turbulent Christmas dinner that becomes a battleground for unresolved pain. At the center of the storm are brothers Carmy and Mikey, bound by their shared passion for food and their troubled family history, yet divided by addiction and varied mental health s...
2024-09-01
31 min
For Love of Recovery
Beyond blame: Family dynamics 101 (with John Varsam)
At some point, most of us have been blamed for something, have taken on more responsibility than we can handle or cracked a joke to avoid an awkward moment. For families where there’s addiction, these experiences are often heightened and can ignite intense feelings like fear, guilt and shame. This episode dives into the complicated family dynamics at play and how siblings often find themselves in unexpected roles, like the “hero”, “golden child”, the “scapegoat” or others. John Varsam, a licensed psychotherapist specializing in treating substance use and family issues, helps unpack how these roles em...
2024-08-01
51 min
For Love of Recovery
When helping hurts: It’s time to set boundaries (with Gillian)
Recognizing when helping is actually doing more harm than good can be confusing when a loved one is misusing drugs or alcohol. Sibling relationships can be even more complicated depending on age differences and whether there’s a natural desire to support one another. This episode dives into what those raw and complex emotions look like for one sister, Gillian. She opens up about her journey with a younger sister battling alcohol dependence, how their childhood dynamic evolved into adulthood, the challenges of setting boundaries, and ultimately, how she found a way to support he...
2024-08-01
43 min
For Love of Recovery
Welcome to FLOR
Dominique introduces her personal journey of loving and supporting her younger brother, Justin, through his struggles with substance use. She discusses the complexities of addiction, the impact it has on siblings and their entire family, and when helping risks doing more harm than good. Dominique also shares the inspiration behind FLOR as the need to shatter stigma and focus on personal recovery. Join her for a journey that navigates sibling bonds and family dynamics, addiction as a disease, and the paths to hope and healing. - FACEBOOK GROUP: Siblings For...
2024-08-01
03 min