Shows
Coupled With...It Started Before You Met Them: How Old Wounds Show Up in Love.When your reaction feels too big for the moment—there’s probably a reason.In this episode, we’re zooming in on a relationship pattern that so many high-functioning, emotionally intelligent people get stuck in: reacting to your partner like they’re someone from your past. Even when you know they’re not your mom, your ex, or the parent who never saw you clearly… your body responds like they are.This isn’t just a mindset issue. It’s a nervous system loop.And until you name the original pattern, you’ll keep following it—ev...2025-07-2817 minCoupled With...The loneliness no one talks aboutYou’re not sleeping in separate bedrooms.You’re not in constant conflict.You still say “I love you.”So why do you feel lonelier with your partner than when you’re alone?This kind of disconnection doesn’t always come with drama.It comes with silence.With routine.With the slow drift into emotional invisibility.In this episode, we’re naming the ache that so many high-achieving, emotionally responsible people carry—but rarely talk about. You’ll learn:How “emotional coasting” takes over long-term par...2025-07-2119 minCoupled With...Knowing Isn’t Enough: Why Insight Won’t Save Your RelationshipYou’ve read the books. You know your attachment style. You understand your patterns.So why are you still having the same argument on repeat?In this episode of Coupled With…, we’re talking about the frustrating truth no one tells you:Insight isn’t integration.And without nervous system safety, even the most emotionally intelligent couples will fall into the same conflict loop—again and again.We’ll unpack why your brain can’t access your tools in the heat of the moment, what’s really happening in your body during conf...2025-07-1421 minCoupled With...Why Male Vulnerability Feels Like a TrapIn this powerful episode, I’m joined by therapist Edan Zebooloon, LMHC, for an honest, eye-opening conversation about male vulnerability—why it’s so hard, why it matters, and what often gets in the way.We explore the emotional bind many men live in: wanting to connect but feeling trapped by a culture that equates emotional expression with weakness. Edan shares his personal journey of surrendering the idea of being a "real man"—and how that act of letting go became the gateway to true connection, both with himself and with other men.We also dig into...2025-07-0734 minCoupled With...Finding Safety Without Shutting DownWhat do you do when you’re not the one who lashes out… but the one who shuts down?When your partner’s emotions take over—and your voice disappears?This episode is for the partners who hold it all together.The ones who manage, soothe, edit, and shrink—just to keep the peace.If you’ve ever felt like the only way to stay in your relationship is to go quiet, you’re not alone.Inside the episode, I’ll walk you through:Why your partner’s reactivity may be...2025-06-3025 minCoupled With...The Hidden Hurt Behind the Household Chore FightLet’s be honest—You didn’t fall in love over spreadsheets and garbage duty.But now?You’re stuck in a cycle where the dishes feel like a personal betrayal, the laundry sparks arguments, and the unspoken resentment is starting to feel heavier than the mental load you’re carrying.In this episode, I’m breaking down what’s really going on when couples fight about chores—and spoiler alert: it’s not about the towels.We’ll dive into:Why “just ask for help” doesn’t work when your nervous syste...2025-06-2325 minCoupled With...Breaking Free from the Reactivity TrapEver found yourself mid-argument thinking, “What am I even saying right now?”You can feel your voice getting sharper, your heart pounding, the words flying out before you can catch them. And afterward? The shame. The self-blame. The fear you’ve done damage you can’t undo.This episode is for you—the partner who reacts quickly, deeply, maybe loudly... and who hates that it keeps happening.In this powerful solo episode, Dr. Rachel walks you through what’s actually going on when you lose it in a relationship, why it's more about protection than...2025-06-1630 minCoupled With...Why Saying Sorry Isn’t Enough: The Real Art of Repair in RelationshipsHost: Dr. Rachel OrleckGuest: Shannon McCune, LMHCWhat makes a real apology land? Why do some repair attempts make things worse, not better? In this episode, Dr. Rachel Orleck is joined by therapist Shannon McCune for a grounded, eye-opening conversation on how to truly repair after conflict.They unpack why well-meaning explanations often backfire, what a real repair looks like in the moment, and how to identify when a recurring conflict may actually stem from a deeper attachment injury. If you’ve ever thought, “Why are we still fighting about this?” — this one’s for y...2025-06-0941 minCoupled With...When You’re the One Who’s Been Hurt: Learning to Love Without Losing YourselfYou want love. You have love.But sometimes… closeness still feels like a threat.You shut down. You lash out. You say you’re fine—but inside, your system is bracing for the worst.This episode is for the partner with trauma—the one who’s been through things that made love feel unsafe. The one who’s still learning how to trust connection without losing control.In part two of this two-part series, Dr. Rachel Orleck flips the lens inward and speaks directly to you—the one with the deeper wounds. With equ...2025-06-0224 minCoupled With...Loving Someone Who’s Been Hurt: Navigating Relationships After Relational TraumaWhen you love someone with relational trauma—someone who's been abandoned, betrayed, or emotionally neglected—it can feel like you're always walking a tightrope. You're trying to be patient, consistent, and safe… but sometimes, no matter what you do, it still feels like you're being punished for pain you didn’t cause.In this episode of Coupled With, Dr. Rachel Orleck breaks down the hidden dynamics that trauma brings into a relationship—how protectors clash, why emotional shutdowns create disconnect, and what happens when love gets tangled up with survival strategies. This episode speaks directly to the partners tr...2025-05-2638 minCoupled With...Holding Space for the Heartbreak: Navigating Pregnancy Loss & InfertilityHolding Space for the Heartbreak: Navigating Pregnancy Loss & Infertility💬 Episode Summary:Pregnancy loss and infertility are heartbreaking—and often invisible—realities that deeply affect couples on every level. In this tender and honest conversation, Dr. Rachel Orleck sits down with reproductive psychologist Dr. Julie Bindeman to explore how these experiences impact relationships, communication, grief, and connection.Whether you’ve experienced loss yourself, are walking through infertility, or love someone who is, this episode offers validation, insight, and practical ways to feel less alone.🧠 What We Cover:Why infertility is often the first “s...2025-05-1940 minCoupled With...Why We Blame — and How to Break the Cycle for Deeper ConnectionBlame feels powerful in the moment.It gives us a sense of control, a sense of righteousness — but it also creates the very disconnection we’re trying to avoid.In this episode, we’re taking a brutally honest and compassionate look at blame:why we do it, how it protects us, and how it slowly erodes trust, intimacy, and emotional safety in relationships.If you ever find yourself thinking:“Why am I always the one who cares more?”“If they just listened, we wouldn’t be here.”“I’m doing everything — and it’...2025-05-1238 minCoupled With...Stronger Together: How Couples Can Navigate Infertility as a TeamHost: Dr. Rachel OrleckGuest: Alicia Webber, Reproductive and Perinatal TherapistEpisode Summary:Infertility can feel like one of the most isolating experiences a couple can face — but it doesn’t have to push you apart. In today’s heartfelt episode, Dr. Rachel Orleck is joined by reproductive and perinatal therapist Alicia Ferris to explore how couples can stay connected and support each other through the emotional, relational, and physical toll of infertility.After a 10-year journey of wanting to become a mother and two years of fertility treatment, Alicia experienced the joy...2025-05-0537 minCoupled With...Why You Lose It in Love: The Truth About Self-Regulation and ConnectionWhy You Lose It in Love: The Truth About Self-Regulation and ConnectionLearn how attachment, nervous system wiring, and co-regulation shape your relationship dynamic.Why do we lose it when we care the most? In this episode, Dr. Rachel Orleck breaks down the real reason self-regulation feels impossible in close relationships. You’ll learn how your attachment style wires your nervous system for protection, why codependence keeps couples stuck, and how co-regulation helps you build the connection you actually want. Packed with real-life examples and practical tools, this episode will help you stop reacting—and star...2025-04-2819 minCoupled With...Healing Together: How Overcoming Vaginismus Strengthened Love and ConnectionIn this powerful and intimate episode, Dr. Rachel Orleck sits down with coach and infertility warrior Urvi Shah to explore how healing from vaginismus not only changed her body, but deepened her relationship. Together, they explore the emotional toll of vaginismus, the mind-body connection, the power of pelvic floor therapy, and how opening up to her partner helped Urvi reclaim intimacy, trust, and love.Urvi’s story is one of courage, vulnerability, and transformation—and it’s also a reminder that healing doesn't just happen within us, but between us.You’ll hear about:Urvi’s 9...2025-04-2134 minCoupled With...Perfectionism in Relationships—The Pressure to "Get It Right" & Why It BackfiresHosted by Dr. Rachel Orleck, Couples Therapist & CoachDo you find yourself overthinking every text before you send it? Or rehearsing exactly what to say so your partner doesn’t get upset—or so the conversation stays “calm”? That’s not just communication anxiety. That’s relationship perfectionism.In this episode of Coupled With…, we’re talking about:Why perfectionism shows up in your relationship (especially if you’re thoughtful, responsible, or highly self-aware)How trying to “get it right” can actually make your partner feel more disconnected—not more supportedThe emotional cost of over-functioning in loveA...2025-04-1419 minCoupled With...Why Understanding Attachment Theory & Relationship Cycles Changes EverythingHosted by Dr. Rachel Orleck, Couples Therapist & CoachEver find yourself having the same argument on repeat? Or walking away from a conversation wondering, “How did we even get here?” You're not alone—and there’s a reason for that.In this first episode of Coupled With…, we’re diving into:What attachment theory actually is (in everyday, real-life terms)Why conflict isn’t just about what you’re fighting about, but how you’re wiredThe pursuer–withdrawer dynamic that keeps couples stuckOne powerful mindset shift to start breaking those frustrating patternsWhether you’re anxiously ov...2025-04-0229 minCoupled With...Welcome to Coupled With… Let’s Make Relationships Make SenseHosted by Dr. Rachel Orleck, Couples Therapist & CoachIf you’ve ever felt like your relationship takes too much effort for how much you care about each other—this podcast is for you.In this short trailer episode, I’m giving you a peek into what you can expect from Coupled With…Whether you're feeling stuck in repetitive arguments, walking on eggshells trying to say things “the right way,” or just craving a deeper connection with your partner—you’re not alone. And you’re not doing it wrong.This show is here to help you:2025-04-0203 min
The Relational Psych PodcastHealing Through Connection: EFT for Couples and Attachment Styles with Rachel OrleckIn this episode of the Relational Psych Podcast, host Dr. Carly Clayney interviews Dr. Rachel Orleck, a licensed psychologist specializing in couple's counseling and infertility. They explore patterns that impact relationships, focusing on the principles of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). Dr. Orleck explains how attachment styles, trauma, and past experiences influence adult relationships. The conversation delves into negative patterns like assumptions and blame, as well as positive behaviors such as gentleness, vulnerability, and mindfulness. They provide insights into how couples can improve their connection and move towards secure attachment, emphasizing the value of therapeutic support in this journey.2024-07-0259 min