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Jaz Twersky

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Kosher QueersKosher Queers101 — Shavuot in CheshvanDid you miss us? As a treat, we've crafted some deluxe Kosher Queers bonus material for you; here's all the short parsha summaries we did throughout the two years of making the podcast, all neatly collected in one place. Get ready for a lot of very rapid speech. Transcript available here!Tip us on Ko-fi! Our music is by the band Brivele. This week, our audio was edited by Lulav, and our transcript was written by Jaz Twersky. Our logo is by Lior Gross, and we are not endorsed by or affiliated with the Orthodox...2021-10-081h 38Kosher QueersKosher Queers100 — V'Zot HaBerachah: What If The Real Blessing…This week, we talk about the dubious metaphor of Gog and Magog, name our city Pluralism and then rename it again, talk about crumbling empires, and reflect on what we’ve learned about the text over the last two years. We do that because this is our last episode of season 2 and thus, the formal end of the podcast!!!! Bye y'all; thanks for these last couple years. (But stay tuned for a small surprise in the feed coming soon.)Transcript here. Lulav listens to the podcast Emojidrome, which you can support on their Patreon. The br...2021-09-2355 minKosher QueersKosher Queers99 — Haazinu: Can I Get a Selah?This week, we debate the unholy combination that is polyamory, ponder the beauty of limericks, flirt briefly with pornoprophetics, and talk frankly a lot about words related to "gadol."Transcript available here, but this week's transcript is also a little delayed due to the holiday, and the full thing will be up and correct shortly.You can check out the band Really From at their bandcamp! You can also check out the work of Fat Torah at their website, where Jaz's classmate Emily Rogal has done cool work! The bit from Talmud we referenced about...2021-09-1744 minKosher QueersKosher Queers95 — Ki Teitzei: Queer FuturitiesThis week, we discuss metaphorical big-tent design, and the joys and perils (mostly joys) of not getting back together with your exes. Also, a reminder not to argue with randos on the internet and skepticism about people who talk in vague, idealitistic terms about "queer elders." Plus, journaling as a reality check on our fallible memories and impression of self and the value of just keeping things to yourself for a change. Transcript available here.You can listen to "Fire Back About Your New Baby's Sex" by Don Caballero, and it's entirely instrumental, so we...2021-08-1953 minKosher QueersKosher Queers94 — Shoftim: Go Touch GrassThis week, we ponder things that can be both liberatory or oppressive depending on the circumstances, discuss interesting translation choices, and compare divine retribution to "buy one, get one free" sales. Plus, thoughts about debt.Transcript here. The part of Job that Jaz was referencing starts at chapter 38:4. Lulav references the "RIP but I'm different" meme. We asked if anyone knows things about modern Jewish Greek translations of the Tanakh and how those compare to Christian translations of the Tanakh into Ancient Greek, so hit us up if you know anything about that. Jaz references...2021-08-1252 minKosher QueersKosher Queers93 — Re'eh: SHABBATPISODEThis week, people are gay for Shabbat, the Shabbos bride brings a dowry of relaxation, and people re-write prayers to make them more gender-balanced, but forget that Judaism has more than four women. Plus, a formal announcement about what's happening at the end of this season of KQ! Transcript here. There are so many different kashrut certifying organizations that each have their own hechsher; you can see a list of some of their symbols here. Here's an Orthodox list of the 39 types of work that are not supposed to be done on Shabbat. Here's the...2021-08-0557 minKosher QueersKosher Queers91 — Va’etchanan: All Flesh Is GrassThis week, we talked about creating accessibility rather than uniformity, finding joy for the future out of really tough situations, and keeping kindness on your person in as ordinary a way as wearing your clothes. Also, we shared our first consolation with you; tell us yours, either on social media or at kosherqueers@gmail.comContent note: we discuss suicide at a whole bunch of different points throughout the episode, non-graphically. Transcript available here.Lulav's cool and queer or Jewish bit for this week is the works of gray Folie, whose Patreon you...2021-07-2253 minKosher QueersKosher Queers90 — Devarim: When Your Kid Becomes A CopThis week, we talk about paradigms of childrearing, giving people space for low-stakes disagreement, and also Kanye lines from 2010.Transcript available here.You can probably still do games on Dreamwidth. Also, Lulav is running and Jaz is playing a game of Heart: The City Beneath by Grant Howard and Christopher Taylor, which you can buy a PDF of here. Lulav references "POWER" by Kanye West, which you can see here.Support us on Patreon or Ko-fi! Our music is by the band Brivele. This week, our audio was edited by Ezra Faust, and...2021-07-1554 minKosher QueersKosher Queers89 — Matot-Masei: Born All at OnceThis week, we talk about abolishing air forces, the human capacity to change large social institutions, and driving lessons. Plus, Jaz can't remember things about Christian theology but does know you can learn different lessons from history, and Lulav is always down to fight Hashem out back behind your fast food joint of choice. Transcript available here. Here are our episodes with Jill and the Hawk! Rose in Bloom by Louisa May Alcott is a public domain work available for your bedtime reading wishes, though be forwarned that it is extremely racist against Chinese people...2021-07-0856 minKosher QueersKosher Queers88 — Pinchas: Treated Like Children, Acting Like AdultsThis week, we learn about how if you see a stick in a dream, it's because G-d is sticking by you. Also, we diagnose Jeremiah with ADHD, discuss how new relationship energy can disguise problematic dynamics, and Lulav starts writing A Gamer's Translation of Tanakh.  Transcript available here. Lulav is running a game of Heart: The City Beneath by Grant Howard and Christopher Taylor, which you can buy a PDF of here. You can listen to the newest season of the tabletop roleplay podcast Friends at the Table season, Sangfielle, here. Here's the Jack Johnson s...2021-07-0150 minKosher QueersKosher Queers87 — Balak: The Rest is CommentaryThis week, we talk about mountains as metaphors, Rashi's genital jokes, and being an anti-astrology gay. Plus, we debate anti-assimilation vs anti-colonial readings, and Lulav is a slut for economic interpretation.  Transcript available here. Seen and Not Heard is a touching narrative podcast about not getting in fistfights with ableist mothers, and instead figuring out how to live your best deaf Jewish life. You can find a comprehensive list of other works Caroline Mincks here or follow them on Twitter @saucymincks. Lulav's first exposure to beating swords into plowshares was this Magic: the Gathering card. I...2021-06-2438 minKosher QueersKosher Queers86 — Chukat: The Other Woman's SonThis week, we discuss whether it's a good idea to tell your girlfriend your secrets and let her tie you up, unearned dramatic plot resolutions, and how rough a position messengers must have been in. Plus, what does it really mean to have land "belong" to a "nation" or a "person" anyway?  Transcript available here.You can check out Yente Over the Rainbow, which is "a matchmaking service for LGBTQIA+ Jewish people" that Jaz works for. Here's the story about Arnold Schwarzenegger's illegitimate child. Also, we do recommend both Hershel and the Hanukkah Goblins by E...2021-06-1754 minKosher QueersKosher Queers85 — Korach: Party Down In Stone TownWe brush up on Shmuel's reasons to hate kings, listen to him brag about not being a jerk, name a sheyd, make folk etymologies about a coronation party at Gilgal, and sneak a Degrassi reference in there. Also, in more serious news, we discuss our preferences for positive vs negative mitzvot and compare commandments to perennial queer discourse.Transcript here. Check out Xai, How Are You? a queer Talmud podcast hosted by Xava de Cordova, which we like. Lulav references the Bartimaeus Sequence, a series of young adult novels which she liked a lot when...2021-06-1053 minKosher QueersKosher Queers84 — Shelach: Historical Hotties and Horrible HebrewsThis week, we discuss a sex worker who hangs out with a king, extremely inconsiderate invaders, and the vibes of different names. Plus serious dilemmas of moral relativity, words that mean "red," and overly horny Talmudic rabbis. We had to mark it explicit because the text is sexually explicit; it's not our fault. Transcript here.Here's Austin Walker's old tumblr blog clockworkworlds and his current work on the podcast Friends at the Table. You can also check out The Objective and follow it on Twitter @ObjectiveJrn ; it's run by Jaz's friend Gabe Schneider, who you...2021-06-0359 minKosher QueersKosher Queers83 — Behaalotecha: He’s Not Being A YankeeThis week, Jaz is back, with some sad personal news but (with the benefit of Lulav's editing prowess) decent podcasting energy! We're talking about mistakes and new connections, condescending to unpleasant people who are nevertheless your people, and $2000 fancy dresses. Plus, elaborate wagon metaphors and the connection between personal breakdown and societal breakdown. Transcript here.Jaz mentioned some book recommendations about death. For talking to Jewish children, there's Zayde Comes to Live by Sheri Sinykin illustrated by Kristi­na Swamer. There's also Tear Soup, which is not Jewish, but applicable cross-religiously and for all ages e...2021-05-2743 minKosher QueersKosher Queers82 — Naso: Angel's on FirstThis week, Jaz was out, so Lulav and guest host Iscah discuss role models who fight altogether too much, being way smarter than your husband, and having your prophesied child take after said husband anyway. They also revisit favorite motifs from Season 1 — like the oath of the nazirite and angels being random messenger dudes who tell you about pregnancy — because they're strangely relevant to this first chapter of Samson's story. Also, the points of reference for Lulav's cohost have shifted from the Talmudic to the Supernatural. You can follow Iscah's work on their public Twitter @JayRBlythe or their personal Twit...2021-05-2030 minKosher QueersKosher Queers81 — Bamidbar: SWERPThis week, we brought it back around to pornoprophetics by talking about Hoshea. Jaz and Lulav disagree about what level of reality to read the haftarah on, but both agree that the plain reading of this text describes a really gnarly dude being abusive to a sex worker and to their children together. Due to discussion of sexual violence, including descriptions of physical & emotional abuse and mention of a book about sexual abuse of a child, as well as just us talking about sex and kink slightly more than is prudent, this episode is marked EXPLICIT.Transcript...2021-05-1353 minKosher QueersKosher Queers80 — Behar-Bechukotai: Bleep Around & Find OutThis week, we were joined by Jill Levinson, Jaz's good friend whose bat mitzvah happened on this Torah portion. We touch on a variety of topics, including BBYO, the nature of man, being a thirsty little desert flower, and cuckoo-lding. Full transcript here.Jill's erstwhile band is The Ruach. Also, Jill mentions in passing the School Colors podcast and the season of StartUp about Success Academy. Both of those are good podcasts about New York public schools. To see the part of the Castlevania: Symphony of the Night intro that Lulav was referencing...2021-05-061h 02Kosher QueersKosher Queers79 — Emor: Big Transliteration would have you believe it's "zedakah"This week, we talked hereditary leadership, divorce contracts, and illegal sweat. Plus vows in moderation, righteous people that were maybe actually just power-grabbing, and 5D Chess. Full transcript here. We really enjoyed 5D Chess. Here's a pretty good overview page on Zadok, and here's a good example of a ketubah text with a halachic prenup from Geek Calligraphy. There are a bunch of other options on ketubah.com if you're looking for one. Also, if you're trans and Jewish, check out the Trans Halakhah Project from Rabbi Becky Silverstein and Laynie Solomon and take their s...2021-04-2938 minKosher QueersKosher Queers78 — Acharei Mot-Kedoshim: Builders and FalconersThis week, we have a special guest on the show, Jaz's friend the Hawk, to talk about ghosts, patriotism, and big parental disses.Our transcript will be delayed this week unfortunately, but will be up as soon as possible. The poem Jaz quotes that opens the episode as an epigraph is "You've heard of Ritalin, now what if I told you governments make bodies into crime scenes for no reason at all," by Ray Filar, found in We Want It All: An Anthology of Radical Trans Poetics edited by Andrea Abi-Karam and Kay Gabriel. The...2021-04-221h 03Kosher QueersKosher Queers77 — Tazria-Metzora: Magical SeparatistsThis week, Jaz has hot takes about major Jewish community events, Elijah's boyfriend says some unnecessarily cryptic stuff, and there are problems with magic systems. Also, there's discussion about magic and then different literary genres for a loooong time, so enjoy that. It even segues into a discussion about the nature of truth, which is always fun.  Full transcript here. If you were also at the Trans Jews are Here Convening and would like to share your thoughts about it with the organizers, it looks like their feedback form is still open. You can also c...2021-04-1440 minKosher QueersKosher Queers81 — 18 June 2012: Tefillin ModusOn this week's episode of "where jewing it man.", the very real podcast about the webcomic Homestuck that we have definitely been running since September 2019, we're talking about if gender is the same as species, why the Statue of Liberty lasts for billions of years, and as always, what on Earth or Alternia is going on? Anyway, happy April Fools y'all, and thank you for joining us in an alternate universe in which we made a queer Jewish Homestuck podcast instead. Full transcript here.Here's Judaism Unbound Episode 261 - Canaan Unconquered. There's some more information...2021-04-011h 06Kosher QueersKosher Queers74 — Tzav: Mandatory Parent-Child TeshuvahThis week, we talk parallels between guillotines and ritual sacrifice, wrestle with ideas of Messianics and also a messianic age more generally, and point out that we apparently all have the power to rob G-d. Plus, there's a 300 year old prophet, and never a golden age. Full transcript available here. If you're interested in hearing more about brin solomon's nonbinary siddur, you can follow brin on Twitter @nonstandardrep, where, as a bonus, you also get to hear its thoughts on daf yomi, or you could check out its website. Here's a source about French revolutionaries...2021-03-2551 minKosher QueersKosher Queers73 — Vayikra: Made to Glitterify YouThis week, we talk about how God needs to give humans scaffolds to learn, holy princes are turned to evil nonsense, a Jewish dude gets a tattoo, and there are some rad name shenanigans. Also, craftspeople are literally magical, but then you gotta take responsibility for the things you create.Full transcript available here.  The first couple seasons of "Ink Master" are available on Netflix. The Shrieking Shack podcast is cool and can be found here. The bit that Lulav quotes from the Quran is surah 22:5. The other older text that Jaz pulled from for a...2021-03-1844 minKosher QueersKosher Queers72 — Vayakhel-Pekudei: Masculinity is a Solitary PrisonThis week, we talk scent sensitivity, princes who are separate from the people, and which parts of gender are worth salvaging. Plus, pet peeves around new gender trinaries and special days in the calendar where the haftarah has literally nothing to do with the parsha (including this week)! Full transcript here. Lulav negatively reviews Rubyfruit Jungle by Rita Mae Brown. Jaz has a new part-time job at Yente Over the Rainbow, where you can go if you're looking for a queer Jewish partner.  This week's reading is Ezekiel 45:16–46:18.  Next week's reading is Isaiah 43:21–44:23. 2021-03-1145 minKosher QueersKosher Queers71 — Ki Tisa: Cleansing VibesThis week, we talk pornoprophetics, which is a delight, and I guess some other things too, like the ritual impurity of a menstruator and the follies of C.S. Lewis' naming choices. Plus, being Jewish in public and avoiding a chillul Hashem. Transcript available here; unfortunately, we're currently only transcribed up to 26 minutes, but will have the rest up shortly. You can get "I Can't Wait To Finally Meet You" by KatSelesnya here or check out the whole Fraudulent Gays game jam bundle here, which has a number of fun games including Hot Gay Bro...2021-03-0442 minKosher QueersKosher Queers70 — Tetzaveh: Everlasting, EverchangingThis week, Isaiah is multiple people, G-d is fractal, and names are everlasting yet malleable and also full of family drama. Plus, converts are important and weather is confusing. Full transcript here. There's some more information about the origin of the fast day here and general features of minor fast days like it. Lulav said "quaternary and quintery" and meant "quaternary and quinary." You can also check out Pleasure Activism by adrienne maree brown and A Year Without A Name by Cyrus Grace Dunham .This week's reading is Isaiah 55:6–56:8. Next week's reading is Ez...2021-02-2545 minKosher QueersKosher Queers69 — Terumah: Nice.This week, Lulav laughs about the episode number, but then we have to get down to the very serious business of distinguishing between fun gifts and war profiteering. Plus, very sweet eight-year-olds and very unsweet terrible kings. Also, there's lots of music excerpts edited in, so enjoy that. Full transcript here.Lulav was listening to "Running Up That Hill (A Deal With G-d)” off of Kate Bush's 1985 album Hounds of Love, and has that song on a playlist shipping the characters Edelgard and Byleth from Fire Emblem: Three Houses (which, it is important to note, is...2021-02-1851 minKosher QueersKosher Queers68 — Mishpatim: Instead Of Fiscal Oversight, How About None?This week, we discuss landlords abusing their power, bizarre managerial strategies, and the esoteric details of synagogue finances. Plus, random questions about vegetarianism and deciding not to trust everybody who shares an identity with you. Full transcript here. You can check out Travis Alabanza's play "Overflow" here. The song Lulav quote near the end of the episode is "Power" by Kanye West (lyrics here). You can read more about religious organizations exemptions from the usual rules regarding nonprofits and the problems that can entail here.  This week's reading was II Kings 12:1-17. Next w...2021-02-1144 minKosher QueersKosher Queers67 — Yitro: What's Up with the Lips?This week, G-d wears a cute waterfall dress, Isaiah has hot lips, and we all pretend to be angels. Plus, bad survey design and gender-affirming conversion rituals that still involve small amounts of pain on sensitive areas. Transcript here (still in progress - only finalized through page 9).Francis Fukuyama wrote a famous book called The End of History and the Last Man, in which he argued that the progression of history was basically over, because with liberal democracy, we've reached our final form. He later walked that position back, however. Also, he's still alive. Incidentally...2021-02-0445 minKosher QueersKosher Queers66 — Beshalach: Oh My Darling, DevorahThis week, there are so many women in the story! By which we mean, a full three women, two of whom even get names. This we also get some sung folktales, a female friend who is too cool for you who you know  is silently or not-so-silently judging you, and intermarried rabbis (meaning, of course, rabbis who marry other rabbis). Full transcript here. Lulav recommends Harry Potter and the Lack of Lamb Sauce by imagitory. She also mentions the podcast The Shrieking Shack, which is a Harry Potter podcast for lapsed fans, with extremely long e...2021-01-2856 minKosher QueersKosher Queers65 — Bo: As Sure As Miami Is Above WaterThis week, we talked about nations being destroyed and assuming that things will always be the same as they are now and also sang some Woody Guthrie, all while saying almost nothing about the news! Also, some thoughts on fairy cows from an angry man. Full transcript here. We encourage saying the shehecheyanu for your first time doing something cool like standing on a frozen lake, but also, not falling in like a March sister in Louisa May Alcott's Little Women.  Also, neat fact: the lake we walked across is called Bde Unma, or "that o...2021-01-2141 minKosher QueersKosher Queers64 — Va'eira: Awful Animal AppellationsThis week, we talk about ancient puns, trust in intentional living communities, the fallacy of safety, and and a cool crocodile. Plus, Lulav really enjoys some fanfiction and does some sewing.  Full transcript available here. The fanfic that Lulav re-read recently and was inspired by is Truth and Measure by Telanu on Archive of Our Own.  Also, props to SR Harris, the fabric company that we shopped at for Lulav's T-shirt quilt. This week's reading is Ezekiel 28:25–29:21. Next week's reading is Jeremiah 46:13-28.Support us on Patreon or Ko-fi! Send us quest...2021-01-1449 minKosher QueersKosher Queers63 — Sh'mot: Mitzvah ShmitzvahThis week, we're talking about visions of apocalypse, and also the name game. Plus, sometimes a prophet tells people that obviously, things aren't going to work out, and they laugh. Full transcript available here. This week's reading is Isaiah 27:6–28:13 and 29:22-23.  Next week's reading is Ezekiel 28:25–29:21.Support us on Patreon or Ko-fi! Send us questions or comments at kosherqueers@gmail.com, follow us on Twitter @kosherqueers, and like us on Facebook at Kosher Queers. Our music is by the band Brivele. This week, our audio was edited by Lulav Arnow, and our transcript was w...2021-01-0738 minKosher QueersKosher Queers62 — Vayechi: Specifically Instructed Not To Be GalsThis week, we talk about a king's hitlist, deathbed revenge speeches, trusting the state, and the dubious nature of certain Jewish claims to indigeneity. Full transcript here. Jaz made a knitted item using the pattern "Mountain Capelet" by Purl Soho. Here's the Matisyahu song that Lulav referenced, "Jerusalem," and here are its lyrics. Yerushalayim shel Zahav, which Jaz references, is a different famous song about Jerusalem.  Jaz mentioned thinking a particular commentary was from the Rashbag, but it was actually from the Ralbag, and is here.  The game of Jewish geography Zoom racing is hosted on...2020-12-3149 minKosher QueersKosher Queers61 — Vayigash: New Trans BonesThis week, we look at some fun goth performance art, which plays with bones and death and a messianic age. We also talk art curation practices, fanfiction vs canon, and the value or lack thereof of inherited roles. Full transcript here. The book with lesbians that Jaz recently read was We Set the Dark on Fire by Tehlor Kay Mejia. The two movies we watched were Happiest Season , which you can watch on Hulu, and Last Christmas, which appears to only be available on HBO.  Jaz also mentions that they've been listening to the All M...2020-12-2441 minKosher QueersKosher Queers60 — Mikeitz: Fetch Me A SwordThis week, we learn about how camels are nonbinary, attempt to define what makes a "real parent," and dissect a famous story in which the women are way cooler than we were led to believe as children.  (Like, for real, there are some single moms in this story who maybe do sex work and maybe are lovers, and definitely roommates who do not get along with the existing power structures of kings and judges.)Full transcript here. Lulav mentions doing quiz bowl with NAQT. Here's the reading from the OU rabbi Lulav also talked about. 2020-12-1737 minKosher QueersKosher Queers59 — Vayeishev: On Occupiers' Time for 2500 YearsThis week, we ponder creating your own separate traditions before returning to join the Jewish people, visions of angels and holy prosecuting attorneys, and calendars. Plus, some fun bonus stories  of said prosecuting attorney messing with some rabbis. Full transcript here.Also, a neat fact that we didn't mention in the episode is that the Orit is the five books of the Torah, plus Joshua, Judges, and Ruth, written in Ge'ez rather than Biblical Hebrew; there's a picture here.  Commedia dell'arte is an Italian theatrical genre popular in the 1400s, wherein the characters are stock ca...2020-12-1048 minKosher QueersKosher Queers58 — Vayishlach: The Prophecy of G-d's SecretaryThis week, we read a very short books, take some digressions into more interesting stories, and  discuss how power protects itself. Plus, Jaz would be bad at thievery because all they'd take are some children's books. (Btw, in case you were worried about how much crying was happening, we are okay! It may offer partial context that we did record this on November 6th, 2020.)Full transcript here.Remy's Instagram is @ rat_dog_remy and Princess' Instagram is @cessprin_the_chug. Jaz highly recommends the book Something that May Shock and Discredit You by Daniel Lavery, a...2020-12-0352 minKosher QueersKosher Queers57 — Vayeitzei: G-d as Domme?This week, we talk about famed prophet and noted bad husband Hosea, learning from our pasts, and if "cow-kisser" is an insult (apparently, yes, but only as a way to tell off rich people). Plus, you get Biblical poetry served with extra bonus poetry on the side, and TSwift standing in a window with a sign reading "I Brought You Out of Egypt."Full transcript available here. This week's reading is Hosea 12:13–14:10 and also there's a single line from Micah, 7:18. Next week's reading is Obadiah 1:1-21 (otherwise known as all of the book of Obadiah). 2020-11-2648 minKosher QueersKosher Queers56 — Toldot: Respect for Music-Based CelebrityThis week, we discuss whether G-d is threatening people or whether a prophet is just a lady or nonbinary person super burdened by being a divine messenger and also super exasperated at their generation. Plus, a questionable mixed drink, an equally questionable bike ride, and some incredibly snarky Kaplan. Full transcript available here. This week's reading is Malachi 1:1–2:7. Next week's reading is Hosea 12:13–14:10. Jaz was reading Questions Jews Ask: Reconstructionist Answers by Mordecai Kaplan.  "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel" are both on Hulu, and both have fun accompanying re-watch podcasts of Buffering the V...2020-11-1951 minKosher QueersKosher Queers55 — Chayei Sarah: The Prophet-Wife Tag TeamThis week, we have an unfortunately timed conversation and totally coincidental conversation about the feasibility of coups. Plus, Lulav introduces us to Bigger Batsheva, we scoff at (and also honor) the idea of personal continuity, and encounter David being an extraordinarily messy bisexual. Transcript available here. This week's reading is Kings I 1:1-1:31. Next week's reading is Malachi 1:1–2:7.Go listen to Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah. Also, a note: depending on how you define 'resigned' and 'pope' and 'history', Benedict XVI was the most recent in a tradition of six to eleven Catholic popes who vo...2020-11-1249 minKosher QueersKosher Queers54 — Vayeira: Old Thou, Younger-Looking You!This week, we talk about a cool trans Ishmael who is really good at her archery, an abundance of father figures and bio dads, and some cute gay prophets.  Lulav also attempts — and absolutely whiffs — a literary reference derived from one of the kings mentioned.Here's a nonacademic summary of the history of how we stopped using "thou." Jaz recently read Modern Reform Responsa by Solomon Freehof and is currently reading Questions Jews Ask: Reconstructionist Answers by Mordecai Kaplan. You can follow them on Goodreads here. The Moby Dick deepread podcast we mention is Moby Dick Energy, our s...2020-11-0548 minKosher QueersKosher Queers53 — Lech Lecha: Don’t Have HeroesThis week, we talk hammer-based encouragements, raptor husbandry best practices,  and what's worth believing in or not believing in. Spoiler: parasocial relationships are not the way to go.  Also we contemplate having the autonomy to make choices that the prophets don't approve of. Transcript available here. This week's reading is Isaiah 40:27–41:16. Next week's reading is Kings II 4:1-37. You can read "The Nutritionist" by Andrea Gibson here and check out their book, Take Me With You. Support us on Patreon or Ko-fi! Our new website, still a little bit under construction, is a...2020-10-2940 minKosher QueersKosher Queers52 — Noach: It's The Captivity, Hazel GraceThis week, we spend like half the episode on background info, and in the back half casually try to figure out what love is, what our obligations to each other are, and if G-d can consent to people hurting us, so you know, just the easy stuff this week. Also, Lulav smushes together the English "Jerusalem" and the Hebrew "Yerushalayim" to create the word "Yerushalem" (thereby maybe accidentally re-creating Aramaic pronunciation?)Transcript available here. Soon we're going to move all our transcripts to our new website, but for now they're still in Google Doc form. ...2020-10-2249 minKosher QueersKosher Queers51 — Bereishit: In the Beginning, There Were BoyfriendsWelcome to season 2! Today we're talking about how this season is going to work, along with the haftarah for Bereishit, I Samuel 20:18-42 (and if you're like, "hey, I have a different haftarah," that's cool! It turns out there's a bunch so we're going to tell you in the show notes each week what we're reading for next week.) Anyway, we're blessed to start off with maybe the Tanakh's gayest story of David and Jonathon, and also definitely the gayest rating scales we've ever had.Transcript available here. Next week's haftarah reading will be Isaiah 54:1–55:5. 2020-10-1535 minKosher QueersKosher QueersX2 — "Judaism" from Rad Child PodcastThis is our season break! We'll be bringing you the beginning of season 2 next week, and in the interim, we have a crossover episode from Rad Child Podcast, which brought Jaz on a guest to talk about educating children about Judaism. Unfortunately, we don't have a transcript for this episode right now. We're committed to continuing to have full transcripts of all our regular episodes and all the bonus content posted on our Patreon. Since this episode is much longer than our normal episodes, it's not currently in the capacity of our very small team to do...2020-10-081h 54Kosher QueersKosher Queers50 — V'Zot HaBerachah: Snark for Screen Time & Sweet Send-offsThis week, we finish up season 1! We argue about the grammar of G-d, expand the scope of what constitutes a name, and compare divine blessings to reality TV. Plus, Binyamin is a baby who likes to cuddle on G-d's breasts. We'll be taking a week break next week, and then we'll see you soon for season 2! In the meantime, we're open for guests on season 2 and you can apply or nominate someone else here. Transcript available here.You can subscribe to Meli's Weird Jewish Digest for their weekly emails. Notwithstanding Lulav's comments about...2020-10-0153 minKosher QueersKosher Queers49 — Haazinu: In Which We Have Opinions About PoetryThis week, we try to define the concept of a parent and the even more confusing concept of a dad, G-d gets reminded about the existence of consequences, and Lulav tells you to drop out of grad school. Plus, Jaz entirely misunderstands a video game, but gets excited about grammar and also poetry, fully living up to being a "word nerd" and not a different kind of nerd. Transcript available here. The Kaddish D'Rabanan is available here, if you also want to read it with your chevruta. If you're interested in learning more about Jewish...2020-09-2445 minKosher QueersKosher Queers48 — High Holy Days: Sweetnesses, Whoopsies, and HutsThis week, for our high holidays special episode, Lulav and Jaz talk about Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, and Sukkot. Apologies: how do we feel about them? (Answer: we feel a lot of different ways, actually!) Plus some wacky noises, antisemitism-derived liturgy, and one of our many ways of marking novelty. Transcript available here.On this episode, we talk about the Ashamnu and the blessing over the lulav. Jaz also references the books This is Real and You Are Completely Unprepared by Alan Lew, Return and Renewal by Aharon Lichtenstein, and A Mosaic of Israel's Traditions...2020-09-1756 minKosher QueersKosher Queers47 — Nitzavim-Vayelech: Tenderqueers and Rude GaysThis week, we talk about merisms that include everyone in a community, G-d modeling good public health and relationship boundaries, and the inherent holiness taking Torah wildly out of context as our ancestors did before us. Plus, taking care of yourself as a form of teshuvah to practice this holiday season. Full transcript here. Content notes: non-graphic discussion of self-harm from 25:09-27:58. Not in the episode, but possibly of interest to listeners: an organization that Jaz used to work for is starting a new program called Serve the Moment. It's a 10-week part-time...2020-09-1046 minKosher QueersKosher Queers46 — Ki Tavo: Curse MountainFILL OUT OUR HIGH HOLIDAYS SURVEY!This week, we talk about manga Jaz read in middle school, whether it's better or worse to read blessings and curses as gendered, and the possibilities of lesbian separatists. Plus there are wombs that are also minds. Transcript available here; it may not be fully completed this week, and if not, that will be fixed ASAP. The books Lulav read, courtesy of Jaz's bookshelf, were Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender, Leah on the Offbeat by Becky Albertalli, and Full Disclosure by Camryn Garrett, all queer YA...2020-09-0348 minKosher QueersKosher Queers45 — Ki Teitzei: When You Come OutThis week, we talk about re-interpreting things out of existence, gay years, and how you can just be a girl if you want to. We also talk about why virginity is super fake and also a bad idea, and thus it's unfortunate that the Torah treats it like it's real. Plus, a short exercise in finding meaning in under-nuanced stories AND sex worker rabbis. Full transcript available here. As regards to the "stubborn and rebellious son" bit, here you can see the commentary in Sanhedrin 68B side by side with the original text. ...2020-08-2755 minKosher QueersKosher Queers44 — Shoftim: We Want "Justice, Justice," Not "War, War"This week, we figure out what proper conduct would look like for a king, if we absolutely must settle for a monarch (which, we're def not convinced on, but if we gotta have one, they can't be too focused on all their cool partners). Plus, Nate Silver is illegal, judiciaries are a questionable framework given their dubious claims to impartiality, and dating nonbinary people is great because there aren't any obvious terms for us. Full transcript available here. At the top of the show, we talked about how Jaz played Monster Prom and Lulav watched...2020-08-2051 minKosher QueersKosher Queers43 — Re'eh: G-d Doesn't Like Your ExesThis week, we use an extended metaphor about monogamy and knowing G-d, raise some questions about Wicca, and have a good time with rubber ducks. Plus, cool historical info about Karaites and the Talmud, how to figure out if a prophet is just a fake, and why bats are not the same as eagles. Also, if you're into Elder Scrolls Three, apparently this episode is for you. Full transcript here.Here's the picture of chai written in rubber ducks! This week Jaz read Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender and The Talmud: A Biography by...2020-08-1358 minKosher QueersKosher Queers42 — Eikev: The Opposite of IniquityThis week, Grandpa Moshe tells us a story for a really long time, the Israelites reject fast fashion, and ~someone special~ gets a date for Tu B'Av. Also, Lulav condemns "nation-ly nations," otherwise known as nation states, and Jaz has a grammatical digression about plural vs singular you. Full transcript here. There's a good overview of Tu B'Av here. Lulav references the classic poem "Jabberwocky" by Lewis Carroll, and if you haven't read it recently, that's always fun. Jaz read Freelance Rabbi by MaNishtana and we both read Trickster's Choice by Tamora Pierce. You can...2020-08-0652 minKosher QueersKosher Queers41 — Va'etchanan: Attractive HeresiesThis week, there's an unusual amount of singing on the podcast as we receive some liturgy, we roll our eyes at Moshe's incessant complaining, and we learn that G-d requires monogamy from Their long-term partner to really wholeheartedly commit to Am Yisrael. Plus, things older than modern books and semi-heritable responsibilities!Full transcript available here. We mention different settings of the Shema in this week's episode. The one Lulav sings is the second in this list, which includes other beautiful/interesting versions to check out! The Wikipedia has a pretty good brief overview of saying "...2020-07-3052 minKosher QueersKosher Queers40 — Devarim: R-r-r-recap!This week, we start the last book of the Torah, and realize the five books have names that are super focused on words. We also learn about the philosophy behind audio editing, compare the geology of the Middle East to the "middle west" of Wisconsin, and find the true meaning of family (it has to do with hair, and also I guess choice and love and stuff). Plus, some shenanigans with parallel structures in grammar, and measuring the appropriate sizes of beds. Full transcript available here.  Jaz referenced meeting their friend Nora, who came on t...2020-07-2349 minKosher QueersKosher Queers39 — Matot-Masei: Lesbian Farm Communes >>> WarThis week, the gender binary makes things like "discussing big household decisions with your spouse" unnecessarily complicated, we wrestle with what to do with a story that's pretty explicitly genocidal, and Tzipporah is the Elvis of the Tanakh. Also, we root for the groups unionizing against Moshe, who has seemingly gone full evil in this parsha. Plus, Lulav is into the fact that Jaz reads books. Full transcript available here. Lulav gave a shout out to her friend Khesed, who you can follow on Twitter @KhesedBein. In this episode, we referred to our guest episode...2020-07-1652 minKosher QueersKosher Queers38 — Pinchas: Dating, Death Prep, and DecadenceThis week, we get some delightful gay personal news for both co-hosts on the podcast, learn about five sisters who change inheritance law, and derive prison abolition from the Torah's penchant for repetition. Plus, advice and perplexion on how to raise people to be Jewish, complaints about Yehoshua being a narc, and waaayyy too many bulls sacrificed. Full transcript here. Lulav's friend Khesed joined us for episode 15 — Bo: G-d Has Needs Too!!!. Around 19 minutes in, Lulav references the "Four Horsemen type people," who are Christopher Hitchens, Richard Dawkins, Sam Harris, and Daniel Dennett, who were th...2020-07-0952 minKosher QueersKosher Queers37 — Chukat-Balak: Flamiroads the Assspooking AngelThis week, we tag the parsha like a fanfic (with Major Character Death), treat Biblical poetry like commercial jingles, and conclude that Moshe can't lead anymore because he wouldn't abolish the police and thus isn't a comrade. Plus, there's an annoyed angel who Jaz wants to be friends with, and a posthumous punishment that Lulav disagrees with for unexpected reasons. Full transcript here. We discussed some of the conversations around defunding the police; New York just voted on its budget, which Mayor Bill De Blasio claims met activists demands to defund the NYPD by $1 billion...2020-07-0253 minKosher QueersKosher Queers36 — Korach: Sacred AnarchyThis week, Jaz and Lulav are joined by Xava De Cordova, host of the queer Talmud podcast Xai, how are you? We talk about why a staff helps bring religious traditions together, how cool it is to have 250 union organizers as biblical characters, and the beauty of a time-travelling anarchist visionary. Xava also reveals her secret title as head of the Anti-Moses Sentiment Committee. (Lulav says she's not a member of that particular committee, and instead belongs to the rival Moshe-was-Progressive-to-Some-Extent-But-as-Soon-as-He-Got-a-Taste-of-Power-Became-a-Bootlicking-Liberal Brigade.) Full transcript here. You can support Xava on Patreon, follow her on Twitter...2020-06-2548 minKosher QueersKosher Queers35 — Shelach: Redacted ScoutsThis week, Tanakh is used as a pickup line, Moshe gets into an argument with G-d about how everyone has value actually, scouts go exploring and name a place "Grape" even though they shouldn't be able to name it because people are already living there, and the Israelites are incredibly bad at Simon Says. Plus, we spend some time getting to know Yehoshua, but kinda wish we didn't because he's a narc. Full transcript here. The quote from Psalms that Jaz said at the beginning of the episode can be found here. Svara, the organization t...2020-06-1846 minKosher QueersKosher Queers34 — Behaalotecha: El na refa na laFor this week's episode, Jaz and Lulav are joined by guest Julia Franco. Julia introduces us to Tzipporah's gay dads and Miriam's skin condition, Lulav reclaims the word pascal, there are continuity errors, the priests form a long daisy chain of blessings over two bowls, and meanwhile, the rabbis don't endorse procrastination but do endorse second chances to be involved in religious life.  Full transcript here. Shout out to Mem on Twitter @shabbosdyke for xer insights about Christian use of terminology. These are vuvuzelot, that Lulav thinks are the holy things that priests are using. L...2020-06-111h 01Kosher QueersKosher Queers33 — Naso: More Like "Dropsy of the OVER IT"This week, we talk about water that's maybe poison, maybe magic, and maybe an abortifacient! But maybe just water. Also, we discuss people who are built-in societal dissenters because they're straight-edge genderqueer punks with long hair — I mean, nazarites who have taken a vow not to drink alcohol or cut their hair. Plus, there's a bonus priestly blessing origin story and the same thing 12 times with a different hat. Full transcript here.If you're enjoying our work, you should also check out the work of Black queer Jewish creators, such as...Rabbi Sandra Lawson, in...2020-06-0441 minKosher QueersKosher Queers32 — Shavuot: What’s a Jew, Anyway?This week, for Shavuot, we answer a question from Xava De Cordova (from Xai, how are you?) and talk about what it means to be a member of a Jewish community. But that's a big topic, so in particular, we're contrasting our perspectives on Christian beliefs in the context of Jewish communities and what it means to hold an expansive idea of community while also valuing Judaism’s uniqueness. Basically, we argue about what Judaism is, but agree that arguing itself is definitely Jewish. Plus, we read some podcast reviews on air! Full transcript here. Th...2020-05-2825 minKosher QueersKosher Queers31 — Bamidbar: MisparimThis week, we discuss the ethics of counting, come up with some alternatives for the English word "tribe," and discover that the Torah believes in West Coast, Best Coast. Plus, we decide that two leaders are boyfriends just because. Full transcript here. You can buy Sister Outsider by Audre Lorde from your local independent bookstore. The etymology for the word "tribe" can be found here. You can also check out this report on nuclear waste signage. Also, we reference the Shrieking Shack briefly; they're "a Harry Potter re-read podcast for lapsed fans," which include us...2020-05-2141 minKosher QueersKosher Queers30 — Behar-Bechukotai: I Waited 50 Years and All I Got Was This Mortgage ReversalThis week's episode includes celebrating sabbaticals, bemoaning Biblical slavery, and comparing campy 90s gay movies to Torah law. Full transcript here. Content notes: Around minute 43, there's a discussion of all the graphic curses G-d will rain down for disobeying. Like really graphic. 44:08-44:40 in particular should especially be skipped if you're queasy about cannibalism or mass graves.At 49:20, Jaz talks about Xava talking about shmita years; you can check that out in episode 5 of Xai, How Are You?.Support us on Patreon! Send us questions or comments at kosherqueers@gmail.com...2020-05-141h 06Kosher QueersKosher Queers29 — Emor: Ableism and FestivalsThis week, we discuss asymmetrical priests, sex worker daughters, and the symbolic meaning of Lulav's name. Also, we talk about different Jewish denominations' responses to intermarriage and a good Tumblr post. Full transcript available here. You can buy Knit One, Girl Two by Shira Glassman and support a queer Jewish author while enjoying a fun read. The article from Sinai Synagogue quoting William Herlands' idea of disabled kohanim being out in the community is here. You can also read "Towards Acceptance, Holiness and Removing Stumbling Blocks" by Lauren Tuchman, writing about stumbling blocks from a...2020-05-0744 minKosher QueersKosher Queers28 — Acharei Mot-Kedoshim: Yes, THAT Line in LeviticusThis week, we discuss the ethics of estimating wrongdoing, offer like half a dozen interpretations of a single line of text, and meet some flirty rabbis in the Talmud who were looking for a unicorn. Also, the Torah said disability justice and "NO WIZARDS!!!"The transcript is here, but owing to some external life circumstances Jaz, some of it is still in draft form; it will be updated shortly. You can buy Transangelic Exodus by Ezra Furman here. The story about Bar Kappara at a wedding is in Nedarim 51a. Here's the original article by...2020-04-301h 04Kosher QueersKosher Queers27 — Tazria-Metzora: We Niddah Get Purified, BabeThis week, we talk Biblical sexism, cleaning up rashes via blood ritual, and Torah's complete squeamishness about the word "penis." Also featured are 90s boy bands and Talmudic voyeurism, so you know there's a lot of excellent stuff going on. Full transcript available here. Content notes: This episode is rated explicit, unlike our usual content, because in the second half of the episode, beginning at around 30 minutes it, there is a long discussion of sex and bodily fluids such as semen and menstrual blood. Also, there's swearing in this episode, and it contains a somewhat...2020-04-2348 minKosher QueersKosher Queers26 — Shemini: I Warned You About Smells, BroIn this week's episode, some poor unfortunate priest boys meet a sad end, we learn about Lulav's history of moirallegiance, and Lulav accuses Jaz of being cowboy-phobic. Also, lots of kashrut is invented.Full transcript available here. Content notes: There is a loud bleeping from 7:38-7:44, where personal identifying information has been removed. Also, this episode includes non-graphic discussion of people burning to death, mostly from 14:00 to 21:17 but with sporadic other references to it. The bonus content Lulav mentions about a conversation with Khesed will be released on our Patreon this Monday!2020-04-1656 minKosher QueersKosher Queers25 — Pesach: Let Our People GayIt's Pesach! Okay, yes, technically this episode comes out on the middle days of Pesach, during Chol HaMoed, not on the day itself, but we were just filled with so much Pesach energy that we have an extra-long special episode for you, all about the holiday. Instead of going through a parsha, we go through a haggadah, and then hear about cool different ways folks celebrate the holiday. Full transcript available here. The Keshet haggadah by Rabbi Nikki DeBlosi can be found here. At 36:50, Jaz cites this JFREJ haggadah, and a piece written by the...2020-04-131h 23Kosher QueersKosher QueersX1 — "8. Eighteen Shades of Grey" from Xai, How Are You?While you're waiting for our Pesach special episode, coming to you this Sunday or Monday, today you can experience a crossover! Jaz went and hung out with Xava on her podcast, Xai, How Are You? They talked Talmud, hair dye, old genders, and also what to do if you don't like prayer. Full transcript available here.You can listen to Xai, How Are You? on Soundcloud, follow Xai, How Are You on Twitter, and support Xava on Patreon, which I encourage you to do! You can also support the Let My People Go campaign here...2020-04-0924 minKosher QueersKosher Queers24 — Tzav: All Vampires are Gay JewsThis week, the Torah invents quarantine of people, we are both in favor of cleansing things with fire, and Lulav learns one way in which using Christian sources can lead you astray. Plus, I'm pretty sure we already told you we're doing the haftorah for year two, but if not, we're doing the haftorah for year two! Our full transcript is available here. Lulav is real into referencing the Front Bottoms this episode, and you can listen to their song Pale Beneath the Tan here. Also, you can listen to Turn the World Around as...2020-04-0241 minKosher QueersKosher Queers23 — Vayikra: Honey & Salt and Fix your FaultsIn this episode, we learn how sacrifices can lead us to a model of transformative justice, do some science on G-d's food choices, and decide that G-d is definitely on spiro. Also, Jaz outs themselves as a librarian and maybe also offers to burn books, but only because they like books so much? It's confusing. Plus, we get an unexpected bonus segment comparing different philosophies of halachah and different ideas of what Judaism is, so get hype for that. Our transcript is available here. In everything that's been going on with the pandemic, unfortunately Jaz is a...2020-03-2650 minKosher QueersKosher Queers22 — Vayakhel-Pekudei: Holy AccountingIn this episode, we learn about some cool women who are making all sorts of impressive art behind the scenes, speculate on the sexuality of artists, and review some neat gold facts, like that the mishkan uses it to make everything and also it is a terrible building material. Plus, both our hosts learn about new facets of each other; catch us just finding out basics like "where we each grew up" and "what our parents do for a living" after having already been friends for years. Full transcript available here. The book that Jaz...2020-03-1947 minKosher QueersKosher Queers21 — Ki Tisa: The Cow Was Just There Bro, I SwearThis week, Jaz and Lulav debate if flat taxes are okay if you don't have any inherited wealth and instead just a bunch of stolen money, question whether Aharon and his sons are human, and apply a Mulaney meme to our favorite sibling trio. Also, Jaz reveals their brother's proposal to de-gender the word "fellow," which we need zoomers to get on ASAP.  The full episode transcript can be found here.You can check out the Twitter accounts for trans daf yomi and Queer Daf Yomi and disabilitydaf. (UPDATE: As of October 2020, two of those a...2020-03-1242 minKosher QueersKosher Queers20 — Tetzaveh: Priestly DragThis week, we go full-on heretical, and discuss the ways in which actually, we're happier without the temple, thanks very much. Also, Lulav tries her hand at another very short summary, we ponder the mysteries of the gemsonas of each of the 12 tribes, and we have a nice sit-down dinner with G-d.  Full transcript available here. You can follow @nireh_or on Instagram and check out the books Soul of the Stranger by Joy Ladin and The Orchard by Yochi Brandes and if you like those, you're welcome to also just peruse Jaz's Goodreads. Also St...2020-03-0546 minKosher QueersKosher Queers19 — Terumah: The Forbidden YarnsThis week, we discuss that holiest of things: making handicrafts. Jaz gives one of the shortest ever parsha summaries and still can't make it within the time limit, but nonetheless really shines (glitters?) in this episode where they get to geek out about yarn on air like never before. Also, Lulav throws us back in time to Hanukkah for a sec, and Jaz is apparently a Midas, except that everything they touch turns Jewish. Plus, we speculate on what cherubim could look like, and honestly, please tell us what you think cherubim look like. The full episode...2020-02-2740 minKosher QueersKosher Queers18 — Mishpatim: This Is Where Incrementalism Gets UsThis week, Jaz, Lulav, and special guest Cassidy Mosity discuss lots and lots of ancient tort law, decide who counts as an enemy you should help out vs an enemy you should sabotage (spoiler: give a wandering pet back to your obnoxious neighbor but don't give gas to the broken-down ICE van), and compare the Torah to other ancient legal codes AND to Winnie the Pooh. Full transcript available here.Content notes for slavery, old-fashioned patriarchy, and colonialism, and mentions of racism and the carceral system. It's a rough one this week. Support...2020-02-2047 minKosher QueersKosher Queers17 — Yitro: Conversion, Commandments, & a Cool DudeBy popular request, we opened this week with a conversation about conversion and proselytizing and kiruv, in which we definitely had more than three opinions. Then we got to talk about actively choosing your parents-in-law, some bass-boosted Torah, and calvinballing the misogyny out of our religion. Full transcript for this episode available here. Here is the source the thing Jaz says at 2:25, about asking potential converts about why they would want to be Jewish given how much Jews suffer, (from Yevamot, in the Talmud) and directly after it, here's the source on explaining the downsides...2020-02-1345 minKosher QueersKosher Queers16 — Beshalach: It's Not a ChidushThis week, Jaz and Lulav are joined by Anat Halevy Hochberg, who brings songs, jokes, and hella Talmud knowledge. Anat also quotes from the original Hebrew easily and frequently, and we're NOT AT ALL JEALOUS. (Okay, that's a lie.) We discuss feminist leadership, how to dismantle white supremacy (more difficult than smashing the patriarchy), and quail poop. Full transcript available here. Check out Anat's website here, and her Instagram is here. The Indiegogo Campaign for Batya Levine's new album, where Anat will be the vocal director, is here. You can find the lyrics for Shirat...2020-02-0646 minKosher QueersKosher Queers15 — Bo: G-d Has Needs Too!!!This week, Khesed joins Lulav and Jaz to talk about G-d's need for attention, revolutionary versus incrementalist approaches to liberation, and weird storytelling mechanics (like, why do we get instructions for how to celebrate leaving Egypt before we've left Egypt? listen here to find out*). Also, the whole episode is a Perchik Corner this episode; you have been warned. This week's transcript is available here. Unfortunately, it is at the time of release only a partial transcript, but we expect it to be a complete transcript within the next few days, and we sincerely apologize for the...2020-01-3050 minKosher QueersKosher Queers14 — Va'eira: Enough Frogs to Overwhelm Our OppressorsThis week, we are joined by long-time friend of the pod Nora Chernov, with whom we discuss embarrassing fandoms, uncircumcised lips, and literal sorcery. We also get some of those good good listener emails, and so get to share a Noach conspiracy theory.  Full transcript available here.  Nora reads some different translations than us, including the JPS Tanakh and the Alter Bible translation. You can read Ethan's full textual breakdown of Noah as a trans man here. The book recommendation we received was for Fearing the Black Body: The Racial Origins of Fat Phobia by Sa...2020-01-2347 minKosher QueersKosher Queers13 — Sh'mot: Cartoonishly VillainousIn this week's parsha, literally so much happens. We've got that good intermarriage content. We've got that great disability justice content. We've got that questionably good throwback to Hanukkah content. We also have miracles and dark blood death magic and MULTIPLE women with names and agency and also a lovely line to include in your Jewish name change ceremonies. Our full transcript can be found here. At around 16:50, Lulav cites the etymology entry for "Hebrew." At around 32:20, the text that Jaz recommends including in your name change ceremonies is in Sh'mot 3:15. Content note...2020-01-1650 minKosher QueersKosher Queers12 — Vayechi: Dead is Dad/ We are sad/ Raided will be Gad/ Bereishit is over — not bad!In this week's episode, children are "not mad, just disappointed" at their parents. We get a cool death poem, magic some son into grandsons, spoil another youngest child, and then decide, once and for all, the proper way to mourn (spoilers: however works best for you, with established ritual there as a fallback support structure if you need one). Also, Jaz sort of ended up in Christmas anthology? Full transcript available here. The scene from the Tamora Pierce book about a deathbed prophecy can be found in Trickster's Choice. Jaz also recommended I Wish You...2020-01-0956 minKosher QueersKosher Queers11 — Vayigash: Shepherds AbhorrentThis week, Jaz & Lulav avoid talking about the state of the world as we enter this bright new decade, and instead enthuse about cool Jewish and/or queer media. Also, we learn about gender discrimination from donkeys, struggle to do very basic math, and get very indignant about Biblical economic policies. This episode's transcript is available here.  In our end of year recommendations, we suggested A Rainbow Thread by Noam Sienna, It's a Whole Spiel, edited by Katherine Locke and Laura Silverman, the music of Anat Hochberg, Hi I'm Case, and King Princess, and the T...2020-01-0240 minKosher QueersKosher Queers10 — Mikeitz: In Which We Punk Everyone and Their BrotherThis week, Jaz and Lulav are back to chatting with no guests, but still have a lot to say! We cover body positivity as defined by dream cows, the afterlife as hyperbole from an aggravated dad, and what makes a name really count as your name anyway. Full transcript available here. The Jewish story Jaz tells about the afterlife is outlined in brief here. In our Continuity Corner, Em recommended jewisheastend.com and The London Years by Rudolf Rocker. Rocker's partner, Milly Witkop, is a cool-sounding Jewish feminist and anarchist. Support us on...2019-12-261h 02Kosher QueersKosher Queers9 — Vayeishev: It Wasn't Really Technicolor (But You Can Dream)We have another guest, who brings so much scholarly energy to this podcast. Lulav, Jaz, and Jaz's coworker DiCo talk about parashat Vayeishev, AKA the parsha where Joseph is a super annoying sibling but his brothers react way out of proportion AKA DiCo's B mitzvah portion! Hear us discuss whether Joseph's coat was even rainbow after all, how culpable you are if you MEANT to do a bad thing but didn't actually do it because someone else did that exact same bad thing first, and why we can't trust police chiefs or prison wardens. Partial transcript available...2019-12-1957 minKosher QueersKosher Queers8 — Vayishlach: Brothers, Mothers, and Angels, Oh My!In this episode, Lulav is gone (temporarily! just on a vacation) and so Jaz brings on some surprise guests: their family! You can hear deeply messed up sibling relationships discussed by two siblings who have a close and loving relationship, and hear Jaz's mom muse about how we all have to learn to adapt to name changes, even the Bible. Full transcript available here. Content note: this episode features a discussion of rape and subsequent murder from 28:52 until 36:44.Apologies for the uneven audio quality! It was an issue on the recording end, and...2019-12-1252 minKosher QueersKosher Queers7 — Vayeitzei: Polycule Therapy PleaseIn this episode, we meet the one man Lulav adores (who happens to be a fictional Jewish communist from 19th century Russia, but that's mere details). Also, we meet four of our foremothers, which is very exciting, and bemoan the fact that only two of them are conventionally considered our foremothers. Plus, tricky tricksters all over the place!Full transcript available here. At the top of the show, we discuss The Modern Yentas Interest Form, which appears to still be open for all your matchmaking needs. Also, in the course of that conversation, Lulav references...2019-12-0549 minKosher QueersKosher Queers6 — Toldot: Prankster & SonThis week, we gush about trans people in tzitzit, discuss environmental justice via wells, and try to determine what the Torah thinks is a good sibling relationship, while this parsha spins us a tale of a very bad sibling relationship. Also, we tell our ancient spiritual ancestors that, while they were definitely hella dramatic, they could have been more creative liars. Also, we wish they had access to therapy. Full transcript of the episode available here.At five minutes in, Lulav talks about Dream Apart and Dream Askew, which are available for purchase here. 2019-11-2848 minKosher QueersKosher Queers5 — Chayei Sarah: Women of Valor AND AgencyIn this episode, Jaz rejoices in the fact that this is their parsha, Lulav giggles about a promise, and together we make a matriarch gay using the power of midrash. Also, we completely forget when Thanksgiving happens. Full transcript of the episode available here. Brin Solomon, who gave us the cool thought in our Continuity Corner, is a musician, composer, and journalist, whose latest work can be found here. Here is their website. Content notes: This episode contains references to slavery and also deeply dysfunctional families of origin. Support us on...2019-11-2147 minKosher QueersKosher Queers4 — Vayeira: Your Only Episode, Which You LoveIn this parsha, Lot is THE WORST, and we don't understand why he chosen to be was saved from destruction. (Maybe it's G-dly nepotism at work?) Also, someone proposes divorcing G-d, Jaz admits to listening to too many Harry Potter podcasts, and Lulav questions whether the parsha passes the Bechdel test. Full transcript available here. Content notes: This episode has numerous references to rape, sexual assault, and incest that are present in the parsha. There's also a brief discussion of historical slavery in our Continuity Corner, starting at minute 48, and other references to slavery throughout t...2019-11-1452 minKosher QueersKosher Queers3 — Lech Lecha: Patriarchs and Matriarchs Behaving BadlyThis week, we're discussing leaving home and name changes, so, big queer feelings are happening up in here. Also, catch us comparing matriarchs and patriarchs to Brokeback Mountain, prescribing appropriate polyamorous behavior, and debating whether you should fight for your home or be willing to relocate when things get rough there. Also, Jaz gives Lulav a confusing rating scale. Full transcript of the episode available here.The camp song that Jaz sings/butchers at 4 minutes in is "L'chi Lach" by Debbie Friedman and you can hear it sung properly here. The #Parshachat discussion question mentioned...2019-11-0740 minKosher QueersKosher Queers2 — Noach: The Climate is Our FaultWe're talking this week about two completely unrelated stories which are for some reason put in the same parsha! Find us talking about animal husbandry best practices, gay rainbow promises, and some very bad linguistics that manages to have some very good politics.Full transcript of the episode available here.At 18:18, Jaz reads the blessing over rainbows. If you'd like to read it yourself, it's here in Hebrew, English, and transliteration. Content notes: climate apocalypticism all over this episode, but particularly starting at around minute 17. From 20:30 to 25:45 there is a discussion of one...2019-10-3141 minKosher QueersKosher Queers1 — Bereishit: G-d of Many NamesThe new cycle has begun, and we're talking this week about things that happen in the beginning, which is turns out is a lot of things! Find us talking about fruit that gives you social anxiety, being cursed with heterosexuality, and the mysterious presence of humans who really shouldn't be able to exist yet, narratively speaking, and yet are somehow there anyway. Full transcript of the episode available here. Around 26 minutes in, Jaz says they'll try to find the source for the rabbinic interpretation that Abel brought the best thing, and Cain brought a mediocre...2019-10-2440 minKosher QueersKosher Queers0 — Isaiah 60: The Breasts of KingsThis week, we launch our pilot episode with the haftorah portion for the week, Isaiah 60. Find us talking about paradigms of scholarship, collective land ownership, and how to translate "the breasts of kings." Also, listen to the second half of the episode to hear us answer fun questions about ourselves and how this podcast will work in the future!Around 30 minutes in, Jaz mentions a story but can't remember the citation. It's from Sifra (a midrashic text) in the section Kedoshim, Chapter 4:9. You can read it here. Content warning: From about 14:50 to 15:15, there is an...2019-09-1937 minKosher QueersKosher QueersGet Hype!: A Very Special KQ TeaserKosher Queers starts a glorious 5780 cycle on 24 October, and we're blessing your ears with our wisdoms & giggles in our pilot on 19 September.Send us questions or comments at kosherqueers@gmail.com, follow us on Twitter @kosherqueers, and like us on Facebook at Kosher Queers. Our music is by the band Brivele. Our logo is by Lior Gross, and we are not endorsed by or affiliated with the Orthodox Union.Support the show2019-09-1400 min