Shows
NorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 24: GaslightingSend us a textIn this powerful episode, host John Sternfels, LPC, a national board-certified counselor and founder of NorthPoint Professional Counseling, sheds light on the destructive psychological tactic known as gaslighting. This subtle form of emotional abuse distorts a person’s reality, often leaving them feeling confused, powerless, and emotionally isolated.John breaks down the core dynamics of gaslighting—how it works, why it’s used, and where it commonly shows up in relationships, particularly in the context of sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. With clinical insight and real-life examples, he reveals how ga...2025-07-1300 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 23: Healthy Parenting: Preparing The Next GenerationSend us a textWhat does it take to raise strong, grounded, and emotionally healthy kids in today’s fast-paced, ever-changing world?In this powerful episode, John Sternfels gives us a sneak peek into his highly anticipated new book, Healthy Parenting: Preparing the Next Generation. With warmth, wisdom, and clinical insight, John unpacks what every parent needs to know to build a solid foundation for their children, one rooted in emotional resilience, spiritual depth, and relational connection.You’ll hear a real-life story, practical strategies, and timeless truths drawn from...2025-06-2211 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 22: Understand Your Attachment StyleSend us a textIn this episode of NorthPoint Counseling Perspective, John Sternfels explores the foundational topic of attachment styles—how our early childhood experiences with parents /caregivers shape the way we connect, trust, and navigate intimacy in adulthood.John unpacks the four main attachment styles—Secure, Anxious (Preoccupied), Avoidant (Dismissive), and Fearful-Avoidant (Disorganized)—offering his own, real-life example, psychological insight, and compassionate guidance to help listeners identify their own patterns.Whether you're struggling with relationship anxiety, emotional distance, or past trauma, this episode will help you:Unde...2025-06-2235 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 21: Family Impact Meeting - Strengthening Connections, Building a Healthier FutureSend us a textAre you seeking a structured approach to restore healing, truth, and unity within your home? Then don’t miss this episode of NorthPoint Counseling Perspective, where we dive into the Family Impact Meeting — a powerful, guided therapeutic approach to help families begin conversations around broken trust, addiction recovery, or betrayal trauma.Hosted by John Sternfels, National Board-Certified Counselor, author, and clinical director of NorthPoint Professional Counseling, this episode unpacks:What a Family Impact Meeting isWhen it’s most helpful in the recovery and healing processHow it gives voice to lov...2025-06-2222 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 20: Truth and Trust - Why a Therapeutic DisclosureSend us a textHosted by John Sternfels, National Board-certified counselor, author, and clinical director of NorthPoint Professional Counseling, this episode dives deep into one of the most essential—and often misunderstood—tools in healing from betrayal: Why a Therapeutic Disclosure.John brings nearly two decades of experience helping individuals and couples navigate the pain of sexual addiction, betrayal trauma, and broken trust. In this episode, he explores:Why a Therapeutic DisclosureWhy Many Betraying Partners Become Hesitant To ComplyWhen it Should Take PlaceHow It Benefits Both the Disclosure and the Betr...2025-06-2222 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 19: Weekly Couples Check InSend us a textIn this episode of NorthPoint Counseling Perspective, host John Sternfels—a National Board-Certified Counselor, marriage therapist, and author—explores the power and purpose of a Couples' Weekly Check-In. This intentional practice can be a game-changer for couples looking to deepen connection, rebuild trust, and strengthen emotional intimacy.John walks listeners through a successful weekly check-in structure, offering insight into how couples can create a safe space to reflect, share, and grow together. Whether you're navigating challenges or simply want to stay connected in the busyness of life, this...2025-06-2212 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 18: Therapeutic Marital Healing Separation AgreementSend us a textIn this compelling episode, counselor and author John Sternfels explores the Therapeutic Marital Healing Separation Agreement—a structured, intentional approach to marital separation that prioritizes healing, emotional safety, and personal responsibility. Designed specifically for couples in crisis who desire clarity, growth, and the possibility of reconciliation, this agreement creates a framework that supports individual and relational healing rather than paving the way for divorce.John walks listeners through the key elements of the agreement, its therapeutic purpose, and how it differs from traditional separations or legal arrangements. He also ad...2025-05-1012 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 17: The Therapeutic Disclosure Process: A Path to Healing and TrustSend us a textHosted by John Sternfels, The Therapeutic Disclosure Process: A Path to Healing and Trust is a podcast dedicated to guiding individuals and couples through the complexities of therapeutic disclosure after relational betrayal. As a National Board-Certified Counselor (NCC) and the owner of NorthPoint Professional Counseling Inc., John brings his expertise in marriage restoration, sexual addiction recovery, and partner betrayal trauma to help listeners understand the role of disclosure in the healing journey.Why is Therapeutic Disclosure Important?...2025-03-2131 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 16: SEX: Secular, Relativistic-Cultural, or Biblical? Sex Across PerspectivesSend us a textSex. It’s everywhere—on our screens, in our culture, and shaping how we think about relationships, identity, and intimacy. But with so many competing voices—secular ideologies, cultural relativism, and biblical truth—how do we separate fact from fiction?In this eye-opening episode, counselor and author John Sternfels explores his upcoming book, SEX: Secular, Relativistic-Cultural, or Biblical? He will tackle the tough questions:How has modern culture redefined sex, and what’s the impact on relationships?What messages are we absorbing—consciously or not—from secular and relativistic pe...2025-03-0728 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 15: Codependency In MarriageSend us a textIn this episode, counselor and author, John Sternfels will dive into the complex and often misunderstood topic of codependency in marriage. Many couples struggle with unhealthy relational patterns where one partner becomes overly reliant on the other for emotional validation, self-worth, or decision-making. This imbalance can lead to resentment, anxiety, and a loss of individual identity.Join John as he will explore:✔️ What codependency looks like in a marriage✔️ How past wounds and childhood experiences can contribute to codependent behaviors✔️ Practical steps to establish healthy emotiona...2025-03-0232 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 14: DOWNLOAD For Parents: Sex, Social Media, and SecretsSend us a textIn this episode, counselor and author, John Sternfels introduces his new book, "DOWNLOAD For Parents." DOWNLOAD is a crucial guide for today’s parents navigating the digital world with their children. Technology has transformed how our kids interact, learn, and socialize. Still, it has also introduced new challenges—exposure to harmful content, screen addiction, and online dangers that many parents feel unprepared to handle.DOWNLOAD For Parents is designed to equip parents and grandparents, with the knowledge and tools to safeguard their children from digital pitfalls while fostering open, hone...2025-02-1820 min
Help Them Heal-with Carol the CoachBehind the Smile A Story About Betrayal and Abuse with Carol the CoachToday, Carol the Coach will be interviewing Melissa Roberts and she talks about the many betrayals in her life and how she used God and Therapy to find post traumatic growth! Behind The Smile: Healing From Abuse, Trauma, and Betrayal by.John Sturnfels This an inspiring, true story of how one woman overcame emotional and psychological damage from childhood abuse, trauma, and a sexual partner's betrayal. Melissa Roberts and John Sternfels's study on childhood abuse and its lifelong effects is a beacon of hope for those seeking to overcome trauma and to live a life with affirmation and purpose.2024-10-2734 min
Healing From Abuse and Betrayal with Carol the CoachToday Carol the Coach will be interviewing Melissa Roberts who has had to overcome emotional and psychological damage from childhood abuse, trauma, and a sexual partner's betrayal. Melissa Roberts and John Sternfels's study on childhood abuse and its lifelong effects is a beacon of hope for those seeking to overcome trauma and to live a life with affirmation and purpose.
This is an inspiring, true story of how one woman overcame emotional and psychological damage from childhood abuse, trauma, and a sexual partner's betrayal. Melissa Roberts and John Sternfels's study on childhood abuse and its lifelong effects is a beacon o...2024-10-2106 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 13: Behind The SmileSend us a textBehind The Smile by John Sternfels and Melissa Roberts is a real-life story of how one of John's clients, Melissa Roberts, overcame the horrors of being abused, traumatized, and sexually betrayed. As a result, Melissa experienced many psychological complexities, often behind a facade of happiness.The book is designed to offer readers a deeper understanding of the disconnect between the external image people project and their internal realities. Sternfels and Roberts guide readers on a journey to uncover the truth behind their own smiles, encouraging them to c...2024-08-1819 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 12: Children and Gender Identity CrisisSend us a textIn this podcast, counselor and author, John Sternfels examines the complexities of gender identity and gender dysphoria in children and adolescents. John discusses from a Christian perspective, how to discuss this complex topic with children in a sensitive and informed manner.Talking to children who struggle with gender identity and gender dysphoria challenges requires sensitivity, openness, and support. By approaching the conversation with empathy, respect, and a willingness to understand, parents can play a crucial role in supporting their children through their gender identity journey. ...2024-06-0826 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 11: A Comprehensive Examination of Mental HealthSend us a textA Comprehensive Examination of Mental HealthIntroductionCounselor and author, John Sternfels, discusses the importance of mental health. Mental health encompasses emotional, psychological, and social well-being, influencing how individuals think, feel, and act. It affects daily functioning, relationships, and physical health. Mental health is not merely the absence of mental illness but also involves the presence of positive characteristics such as resilience, self-esteem, and the ability to manage stress.Historical ContextHistorically, mental health has been misunderstood and stigmatized. Early civilizations often attributed m...2024-05-2741 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 12: Self Image vs Self DefinitionSend us a textIn this episode, Patrick Eiler's LPC, CSAT talks about self-image and self-definition.Self-image and self-definition are two facets of identity that significantly shape how individuals perceive themselves and interact with the world around them. While they are interconnected, they represent distinct aspects of one's self-concept.Self-image relates to how individuals perceive themselves in relation to others and the external world. It encompasses one's appearance, social roles, status, and reputation. Societal norms, cultural expectations, and interpersonal interactions influence self-image. It can be shaped by feedback from others, societal stereotypes, and media...2024-05-0607 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 10: Understanding Empathy - How To Develop EmpathySend us a textIn this episode, counselor and author John Sternfels will dive into the core of human connection, exploring the transformative power of understanding, compassion, and shared emotions through empathy.Empathy, often hailed as the glue that binds us together, is more than just a buzzword. It's the force that bridges gaps, dismantles barriers, and fosters a sense of unity in an ever-evolving world.Join me as I help navigate the nuances of empathy, discussing its impact on personal growth, mental well-being, and the broader social fabric. I will...2024-04-0711 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 10: Healthy SexSend us a textThe concept of healthy sex can be explored through a multidimensional lens that takes into account various aspects of human well-being. The 12-dimension model provides a comprehensive framework to understand and promote a holistic approach to sexual health.By acknowledging and nurturing each dimension of this model, individuals and couples can cultivate a well-rounded approach to healthy sex. Recognizing that sexual well-being is interconnected with various aspects of life encourages a more comprehensive understanding and appreciation of the richness that a fulfilling and healthy sexual relationship can bring.2024-03-2415 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 9: Understanding Fear - An In-Depth LookSend us a textIn this episode, counselor and author John Sternfels discusses the topic of fear. Fear, an emotion deeply embedded in the human experience, has been a subject of fascination, analysis, and debate throughout history. As a multifaceted phenomenon, fear touches upon various aspects of our lives, influencing our decisions, shaping our perceptions, and even steering the course of societies. Introducing fear as a topic of discussion is not merely an exploration of an emotion but an invitation to unravel the intricate layers that compose this complex terrain. At its core, fe...2024-03-1020 minNorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 8: Toxic Shame and PerfectionismSend us a textIn this episode, counselor and author John Sternfels discusses Toxic shame. Toxic shame is a pervasive and enduring form of shame that can significantly impact one's quality of life. It is consciously transferred by means of shaming rules and can be deeply ingrained in one's sense of self, leading to constant exposure of the failure of the self to the self. Toxic shame is often driven by the fear of being exposed or rejected, leading individuals to develop perfectionistic tendencies as a defense mechanism to mask their insecurities and feelings of u...2024-03-0313 min
NorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 7: Marriage, Now What?Send us a textIn this episode, counselor and author John Sternfels discusses Marriage, Now What? Marriage, Now What? encapsulates the sentiment many couples experience after the initial excitement of marriage settles. It's a reflective phase where partners may ponder the direction of their relationship. This question invites couples to embrace the evolving nature of their union and actively shape its trajectory.In this phase, couples can explore shared goals, set new aspirations, and deepen their connection through effective communication. It's an opportunity to assess individual and collective growth, adapting to life's changes. Date nights, op...2024-02-2507 min
Revive MinistriesRevive Ministries Podcast “Our Connections” With Patrick Eilers
Welcome to Revive Ministries Podcast. As we enter February, Revive Ministries Podcast would like to reflect on the communities we belong to and the connections surrounding them. Today, to speak deeper when it comes to asking the question about "Our Connections" is a new guest, Patrick Eilers. Thank you so much for joining us and being part of this discussion.
Disclaimer: if you are in crisis, please seek appropriate professional help immediately. The new 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline is available for those in the States.“Perhaps the secret of living well is not in having all the answers but in...2024-02-2235 min
NorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 6: Grandkids Unplugged - Social MediaSend us a textIn this episode, counselor and author John Sternfels discusses children and social media. Children and social media have become inseparable in today's digital age. As technology advances, more kids are gaining access to various social media platforms at increasingly younger ages. While social media offers opportunities for communication, creativity, and learning, it also raises concerns about the potential risks and impacts on children's well-being.On the positive side, social media can enhance children's social skills by allowing them to connect with peers, share experiences, and express themselves creatively. It can also...2024-02-1814 min
NorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 5: Demystifying PolygraphsSend us a textIn this episode, counselor and author John Sternfels discusses Polygraphs, also known as lie detectors. Polygraphs are instruments used to measure physiological responses associated with truthfulness or deception. The primary purpose of a polygraph test is to assess whether a person is being truthful or deceptive in their responses to a set of questions.Here are some key components and principles associated with polygraph examinations:Physiological Measurements:Heart Rate: Polygraphs measure changes in heart rate using an electrocardiogram (ECG) to monitor the heartbeat....2024-02-1107 min
NorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 4: Partner Betrayal TraumaSend us a textIn this episode, counselor and author John Sternfels discusses partner betrayal trauma. Partner Betrayal Trauma refers to the emotional, psychological, financial, spiritual, and relational distress experienced by an individual when their partner engages in actions that violate trust and betray the core values of the relationship. This type of trauma often arises from infidelity, deception, or other forms of betrayal within a romantic relationship.Critical components of partner betrayal trauma include:Trust Violation: The betrayed partner experiences a breach of trust, a fu...2024-02-0438 min
NorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 3: Sexual Addiction History and The 30 Task Recovery ModelSend us a textIn this podcast, counselor and author John Sternfels will discuss sexual addiction, also known as hypersexuality or compulsive sexual behavior, and the 30-Task model of recovery."Like an alcoholic unable to stop drinking, sexual addicts are unable to stop their self-destructive sexual behavior. Family breakups, financial disasters, loss of jobs, and risk to life are the painful themes of their stories."Sex addicts come from all walks of life - they may be ministers, physicians, homemakers, factory workers, salespersons, secretaries, clerks, accountants, therapists, dentists, politicians, or executives, to name...2024-01-2814 min
NorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 2: Healthy ParentingSend us a textIn this week's podcast, counselor and author John Sternfels shares the importance of Healthy Parenting. Healthy parenting is a multifaceted approach that involves providing emotional, physical, and cognitive support to foster a child's overall well-being and development. It goes beyond meeting basic needs and extends into creating a nurturing and positive environment that promotes a child's growth, self-esteem, and resilience.It is an ongoing process that evolves with the changing needs of both parents and children. By fostering a supportive and loving environment, promoting open communication, and embracing adaptability, p...2024-01-2106 min
NorthPoint Counseling PerspectiveEpisode 1: Developing a Positive Parent and Child RelationshipSend us a textIn this podcast, counselor and author, John Sternfels shares the importance of Healthy Parenting.The parent-child relationship is a fundamental and unique bond that plays a crucial role in shaping an individual's development and well-being. It is a complex interplay of emotions, responsibilities, and influence that evolves over time. This relationship typically begins with the birth of a child, but it extends far beyond infancy, shaping the individual throughout various stages of life.The parent-child relationship undergoes significant transformations during adolescence. Parents must navigate the delicate balance between granting...2024-01-0904 min
Positive Sobriety PodcastEpisode 122 -- Testing Honesty in Disclosure with John SternfelsWould the use of a polygraph help a couple reestablish trust after an intimate betrayal? Nate and David talks with John Sternfels, LPC, NCC, CSAT, the founder of Northpoint Counseling and author of “A Partners Guide to Truth and Healing.”
For more information check out https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=da6jyex_VYY
Contact: john@northpoint-counseling.com
2022-03-1154 min