Shows
We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 56: Mullholland Drive, with Tim CoeYakov and Josh talk with Tim Coe about David Lynch's moody, tense, reality-bending meditation on heartbreak, stardom, and the shifting faces of LA.2016-04-091h 57We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 55: Grave Encounters, with Whitney ReynoldsJosh and Yakov are joined by Whitney Reynolds to chatter about the good and the ehhhh in this spooky haunted asylum riff.2016-01-311h 31We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 54: HausuThis cult classic from 1977 is all about gonzo experimentation, mixing humor and horror in dizzying but charming ways.2016-01-171h 30We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 53: KrampusA good cast is wasted on an incoherent mashup of several wildly different films, none of which would have been great in the first place.2016-01-031h 17We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 52: ThinnerJ and Y are at odds over whether this mid-90s horror flick was completely or merely watchably not-so-good. Josh is correct.2015-12-101h 18We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 51: Crimson PeakJosh and Yakov are joined by Mark Popham for a cheery discussion of the good bits and odd stumbles of this very nice-looking piece of genre-mush moodful fun.2015-11-221h 33We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 50: The ShiningWe manage to spend two hours without even really discussing the blood elevator. That's how much this classic has going on.2015-10-182h 01We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 49: Hardware, with Jesse HoldenA messy relic of the 90s, pitting unlikeable humans against an inept killbot in a post-apocalyptic future that its surprisingly hard to care about. Also a cameo by Lemmy.2015-10-061h 33We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 48: A Girl Walks Home Alone At NightThoughtful, visually tremendous film about the burdens and decisions of a young man and young woman in Bad City.2015-08-091h 46We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 47: The Lost BoysThis 1987 Joel Schumacher film can't really decide if it's a screwball comedy or a teen coming of age story, and so does a confused job of trying to be both.2015-07-121h 45We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 46: Wes Craven's New NightmareWes Craven revisits the original Nightmare from a metatextual distance, casting the cast as themselves. Johnny Depp does not appear in this film.2015-06-071h 36We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 45: A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)Freddy Kreuger! Claw hand! Dying in dreams! Introducing Johnny Depp! This is not a movie for which I really need to construct a coherent critical summary. You've seen it, or you should see it.2015-05-172h 00We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 44: WolfCopNever has a movie been more like what you'd expect to get when you see "WolfCop" on Netflix than this one. There's a cop. He's a wolf. Or vice versa. It's Canadian! And not very good.2015-05-031h 35We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 43: It FollowsYakov and Josh are surprised and impressed by the subtle characterizations and lack of easy explotative outs in this meditation on sex, consent, young adulthood, and the isolation and fear that comes with betrayal. Also: a killer ghost.2015-04-122h 31We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 42: The Wicker Man (1973)What a weird, wonderful oddity of a film! Chock full of folk music and surprisingly non-exploitative nudity and the occasional pagan ritual murder, the original film bears essentailly zero resemblence to Nic Cage's 2006 bee adventure.2015-03-291h 27We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 41: Night WatchJosh and Yakov enjoy the heck out of this playful and visually fun supernatural horror/thriller/fantasy from 2004 even though it's only about half of the story, with sequel Day Watch picking up the other half of the plot. Also, Yakov speaks some Russian.2015-03-011h 30We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 40: My Bloody Valentine 3DIt's a Valentines Day tradition; this year the box 'o filmic chocolates is the sadly deeply mediocre (but 3D!) 2009 remake of the 1981 gory/silly Canadian slasher classic. Josh drank some Moosehead Lager just to get through it.2015-02-151h 50We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 39: The Fly (1986)Cronenberg as entymologist! Yakov and Josh revel in the boffo makeup/creature effects of this Jeff Goldblumiest of Jeff Goldblum roles and speculate about Seth Brundle clones inhabiting the Hollywood universe.2015-02-011h 56We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 38: I, FrankensteinThe WHSFTSY fellas tear into this addled Trapper Keeper drawing of a film, trying to find something redeeming in a film that's neither a meditation on Mary Shelley's original story nor a particularly good action blockbuster.2015-01-181h 57We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 37: NightbreedClive Barker makes film; execs mangle film; Barker restores film; Josh and Yakov watch film; Josh and Yakov complain about film.2015-01-041h 52We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 36: Silent HillWho is Silent Hill for? Fans of the video games? Fans of horror films? Maybe a little bit of neither! Yakov and Josh turn up the fog machine and wonder how Sean Bean manages to not get killed, among other things.2014-12-302h 12We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 35: Ravenous and DumplingsJosh and Yakov take on two very different eating-people-for-fun-and-profit flicks, 1999's Ravenous and 2004's Dumplings, and talk about what goes wrong and right, respectively, with the films.2014-11-271h 43We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 34: PrometheusFilmed thirty years later and set thirty (still futuristic) years earlier, this Alien prequel gives Aliens-franchise fans Yakov and Josh a lot to make complicated faces about, figuratively speaking.2014-10-272h 09We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 33: AlienJosh and Yakov revisit Ridley Scott's classic and pick out the few rough spots while chattering about all the stuff that's great and meandering through the franchise that followed.2014-10-062h 48We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 32: The ConjuringA close reading of the recent based-on-a-truthy-story flick about paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren tackling a big mess of haunty badness in 1971. An imperfect but at times super duper creepy film.2014-09-102h 27We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 31: ScreamThe J and the Y take a visit to another formative meta-horror classic, 1996's Wes Craven horror comedy Scream, and talk about what works well, what doesn't, and just how amazingly rooted/dated in the mid-90s it is.2014-08-291h 58We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 30: The Blair Witch ProjectIt's 1999, and some idiot kids got killed in the Maryland woods, and it's up to Josh and Yakov to basically talk about how they feel like The Blair Witch Project still holds up really well. Also a bit about video games!2014-07-262h 04We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 29: Paranormal ActivityYakov and Josh tackle the 2007 indie wunderkind Paranormal Activity, and talk about found footage, zero-budget horror, and the problem with having your main character a terrible unlikeable boring jerky jerkface jerk. But it's a good movie!2014-07-102h 18We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 28: In the Mouth of MadnessPolishing off the John Carpenter "Apocalypse Trilogy", Josh and Yakov watch Sam Neill watch the world go to hell and talk talk about metanarratives, Lovecraft, and power suits.2014-06-142h 28We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 27: Prince of DarknessYakov and Josh talk about John Carpenter's 1987 film, comparing it with The Thing (see ep. 25!) and marveling at the mustache and general creepiness of the film's notional hero. Also, Satan.2014-05-121h 54We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 26: Tow more The ThingsBefore there was The Thing, there was 1951 The Thing From Another World! After The Thing, there was...another film called The Thing! We talk about them both, and the 1938 short story "Who Goes There" that started this all.2014-04-282h 19We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 25: The Thing (1982)It's our one-year podcastversary, and we celebrate with John Carpenter's The Thing, a classic horror and paranoia flick featuring some really delightful practical special effects work and also a plenty of Kurt Russell.2014-04-141h 41We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 24: Friday the 13th part 4: the Final ChapterThe final chapter that very much wasn't, this mid-franchise slasher manages to typify the early 80s slasher genre without doing very many interesting things in the process.2014-04-061h 58We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 23: The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)The subject of any number of sequels and remakes, this 1974 proto-slasher flick is all kinds of interesting for both the genre tropes it inspired and the ways in which it differs from the standbys of the slasher genre that followed.2014-03-032h 04We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 22: My Bloody Valentine (1981)It's just Yakov and Josh and this amazingly of-its-time 1981 Canadian slasher fic, bringing some love into your Valentine's Day proximity. Won't you be (getting murdered in a) mine?2014-02-172h 04We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 21: RinguJosh and Yakov tackle the 1998 Japanese horror flick Ringu (remade for the US in 2002 as The Ring), and develop a theory that this is actually still the Jacob's Ladder review and they've been dead the whole time.2014-02-031h 55We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 20: Jacob's LadderY and J have a good trip through bad trip classic Jacob's Ladder, wrestling with the clashing metaphysics and mixed messages of this often visually arresting story about why it's hard out there for a postal worker.2014-01-201h 44We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 19: Re-AnimatorIn a film that looks exactly like it cost $900K to make in 1985, Josh and Yakov find a lot to love (most of it in Jeffrey Comb's performance as Herbert The Love Bug West) and also plenty to complain about.2014-01-061h 40We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 18: V/H/SIt's a six-in-one special, as Yakov and Josh break down the five films-within-the-film of this horror short collection and talk about found-footage faux-documentary cinema.2013-12-232h 34We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 17: House of the DevilJosh and Yakov are thrilled to discuss a movie they actually unambiguously enjoyed, this 2009 period-piece gem from upstart horror writer/director Ti West that plays in a lot of great ways with the heritage of the horror genre.2013-12-091h 39We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 16: Prophecies Uprising and ForsakenWhat's the Prophecy franchise without Christopher Walken? Really, really terrible. Josh and Yakov sit through close to three hours of terminally dull cash-ins and then struggle and largely fail to find redeeming qualities in the experience.2013-11-252h 00We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 15: John Dies At The EndHe hasn't been working much in the last twenty years, but Phantasm director Coscarelli puts in a comparatively strong (if still fairly scattered) entry with this film; J and Y dig into John... and consider it as a reflection of Don's earlier work. Also, dick jokes.2013-11-111h 52We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 14: Prophecy 2 and Prophecy IIIWalken is back, and then back AGAIN, as Josh and Yakov tackle a two-fer with the second and third Prophecy films. Are angels literally birds? Are these movies secretly remakes of Terminator 1 and 2, with Ted from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adenture in the role of John Conner? Hey, isn't that that guy from Buffy? These questions, and more: THOROUGHLY ANSWERED HEREIN.2013-10-212h 11We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 13: PhantasmThe Phantasm! A film that may or may not be the secret to the universe, this charming 1979 oddity is the best possible sort of mess, with oddball characters, memorable (if in many cases memorably stitled) dialogue, and a dreamlike feel to both the plotting and (for better and worse) editing. Josh and Yakov try to puzzle out just what the hell happened and theorize that it's actually an out-there Dune adaptation.2013-10-071h 57We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 12: The ProphecyYakov and Josh dip into The Prophecy franchise, before it somehow became direct-to-video kissing cousins with Hellraiser under Dimension films, and try to make sense of what exactly a star-studded cast of high-tempered angel honchos (Walken as Gabriel, Eric Stoltz as Simon, Viggo "Aragorn" Mortensen as a boffo Lucifer) are trying to accomplish with a spat over a cannibal Colonel's soul.2013-09-231h 57We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 11: Event HorizonWhat do you get when you cross Alien, Aliens, Solaris, Hellraiser, and the cinematic mind that brought you several Resident Evil films? A damn mess, is what. Yakov and Josh talk about what works, what doesn't, the various movies they wish this had been, swivel chairs, dolly zooms, and gothy engine rooms.2013-09-091h 59We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 10: Cabin in the WoodsWith the Hellraiser franchise behind them, Josh and Yakov take a breather from troubled horror franchises to didiscuss an untroubled one-off satire of the genre, 2012's "Cabin in the Woods". They talk about the film's deconstruction of the horror genre's tropes and bad habits, the role of voyeurism in horror spectacle, the film's winking references to Hellraiser itself, and, gosh, a whole lot of things.2013-08-261h 53We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 9: Hellraiser: RevelationsJ and Y discuss the piece of F-ing S that is the ninth (and at the moment final) film in the troubled Hellraiser film franchise, a rushed "make it or lose your rights to the IP" stinker so bad that it makes the previous terrible film look positively competent. Even the real Pinhead, Doug Bradley, refused to show up for this one, replaced by a hapless, scenery chewing standin who sets the tone for the rest of the film by being simultaneously overt and dull. Also, two young men keep shouting TIJUANA, and a baby dies? It's a real keeper...2013-08-111h 57We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 8: Hellraiser: HellworldA mysterious (in the sense that the film never bothers to, uh, talk about it) MMO called Hellworld gets a passel of teens in a barrel of trouble when Lance Henricksen phones in a revenge plot that makes basically zero sense and OH GOD WHY DID WE WATCH THIS MOVIE WHAT WERE WE THINKING OH GOD IT'S SO BAD, IT'S, IT'S REALLY TERRIBLE, I CAN'T EVEN WRITE A PROPER SARCASTIC SYNOPSIS, UGH and also Henry "The Most Recent Superman" Cavill is in it as a total dick.2013-07-292h 14We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 7: Hellraiser: DeaderA spec script called Deader somehow becomes a Hellraiser sequel called (wait for it) Hellraiser: Deader, and we're all sort of worse off for it! Yakov and Josh dig into the weird structural problems and narrative dalliances of this Romanian-filmed direct-to-video story of a bad girl journalist who gets in over her (pin)head. See also: Joey the comic relief subway sex party glampunk! Seriously, he's about the most entertaining thing in the film. Oof.2013-07-082h 47We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 6: Hellraiser: HellseekerIn what feels like an odd echo of the previous film, an unlikeable protagonist wanders through a hellish, weird couple of days encountering terrible visions and softcore propositions while mapping the road from sin to regret. Or something. It's not very good, but Yakov and Josh get through it somehow and talk about all the little things that helped make the movie not work.2013-06-242h 43We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 5: Hellraiser: InfernoYou got your cop noir in my Hellraiser franchise! No, YOU got YOUR obligatory Pinhead appearance in my unrelated spec script! Basically, Inferno's one of those "two okay tastes that taste like butt together" situations, and Josh and Yakov go into weary, maddened detail about just how and why the film manages to not do most of the things it's trying to do as well as it ought to have. Also: twin karate cowboys.2013-06-102h 29We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 4: Hellraiser IV: BloodlineHe's a brilliant French toymaker! She's a demonic princess from hell! They...raise hell! Yakov and Josh dig into the not-terrible, not-great fourth Hellraiser film, an anthology story set in 18th C. France, contemporary New York, and FUTURE SPACE STATION, and discuss what works and doesn't in this ambitious but hobbled attempt to create a proper backstory for Pinhead's friends and coworkers.2013-05-272h 17We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 3: Hellraiser III: Hell On EarthYakov and Josh dig into Hell on Earth, and discuss Greenboro-as-Manhattan, ridiculous new Cenobites, how to be bad at journalism, Pinhead's philosopher/salesman chops, why you shouldn't have an actress named Terry in the same film as a different character named Terri, and whether Pinhead actually dislikes Jesus or just likes ribbin' him a little.2013-05-122h 25We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 2: Hellbound: Hellraiser IIYakov and Josh recap and deconstruct the 1988 Hellraiser sequel, Hellbound, and talk about parallels between the two films, Julia's assertive approach to the afterlife, the philosophy and metaphysics of The Labyrinth, and how much Roger Ebert hated this movie.2013-04-292h 11We Have Such Films To Show YouEpisode 1: HellraiserJosh and Yakov kick things off with a discussion of the ups and downs of the flawed gem that is Cliver Barker'soriginal 1987 Hellraiser film, and kibitz about their Hellraiser and horror memories.2013-04-151h 55