Shows
The Dov Baron ShowPart 3 of 3: đïž You May Have to Break Your Own Heart: The Truth About Boundaries, Grief, and Radical Self-Worth | Juliane Taylor Shoređïž The Dov Baron Show | Episode 3 of 3 You May Have to Break Your Own Heart: The Truth About Boundaries, Grief, and Radical Self-Worth, with Juliane Taylor Shore đ What if your fear of conflict is really just a fear of facing the truth within yourself? What if every boundary you avoid setting is a betrayalânot of othersâbut of the child inside you who still thinks they need to earn love? In this raw and revelatory finale, therapist, author, and brain-based boundary whisperer Juliane Taylor Shore returns for the third and final installment to shatter the myths around boundaries an...2025-06-1829 min
The Dov Baron ShowPart 1 of 3: đ„ âWhat if Youâre Not Calm. Youâre Numb. | Juliane Taylor Shore on Trauma, Boundaries & BelongingâPart 1 of 3: đ„ âWhat if Youâre Not Calm. Youâre Numb. | Juliane Taylor Shore on Trauma, Boundaries & Belongingâ . Your body remembers how to love⊠once it feels safe. . You were never broken. You were brilliantly wired... to survive pain. But if youâre still running that survival code? Youâre not in control, your nervous system is. . In this explosive first episode of a 3-part series, I sit down with Juliane Taylor Shore, author of "Setting Boundaries That Stick." Juliane is a psychotherapist whoâs equal parts neuroscientist, soma...2025-06-1533 min
Sleeping AroundBoundaries Are Not What You Think with Juliane Taylor ShoreWhat exactly is a boundary, and why do so many people struggle to set and maintain them? In this episode, weâre breaking down what boundaries truly are, how to set them effectively, and the secret to ensuring theyâre ârespected"!Connect with Juliane Taylor Shore:Why Does My Partner? PodcastSetting Boundaries That Stick BookInstagram:https://www.instagram.com/julianetaylorshore?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==Website:Juliane Taylor ShoreEmail:admin@julianetaylorshore.com 2025-02-1158 min
Pirate Monk Podcast449 |  Juliane Taylor Shore | The Brain Wears History Colored Glasses The Brain Wears History Colored Glasses w/ Juliane Taylor Shore
Aaron recaps the 2024 Samson Summit. He shares his takeaways on vulnerability, storytelling and five senses activities. Then he has bad internet. Nate discusses the first ever Canadian retreat June 6-8, eh.
This week, Nate interviews Juliane Taylor Shore. Juliane is an author, speaker, teacher, therapist, and leads online and in-person intensives and workshops. She nerds out (in a good way) on neuroscience as she shares ways with us on understanding and creating new internal practices for health and safety. Juliane shares a quote that the âbra...2025-01-2447 min
The Christina Crowe Podcast: Making the invisible VISIBLEE83:Neurobiology & Mental Health: Self-Compassion, Integration & Psychological Safety with Juliane Taylor ShoreWhat if understanding your brain could change the way you think about mental health, relationships, and self-compassion?Today on The Christina Crowe Podcast, weâre connecting the dots with my favorite teacher of neurobiology, Juliane Taylor Shore. Jules brings fascinating insights into how our brains shape our experiencesâand how we can work with our minds instead of against them.đŹ In this episode, we explore: The differences between integrated vs. less integrated brain states, How self-compassion plays a crucial role in behaviour change & mental health, The imp...2025-01-1349 min
Sidewalk TalkHow to set boundaries that stick and the brain stuff behind boundaries with Juliane Taylor ShoreHow to set boundaries that stick and the brain stuff behind boundaries with Juliane Taylor Shore
As always please consider following the Sidewalk Talk podcast and leaving a review. It helps more folks find the work of Sidewalk Talk and the amazing guests we host on the podcast.
Juliane Taylor Shore, LMFT, LPC, SEP, is a therapist, author, and teacher dedicated to creating spaces where people can cultivate self-compassion, self-trust, empowerment, and integrity. Juliane regularly teaches and speaks to audiences around the world, translating the latest insights in neurobiology into practical tools that foster meaningful b...2024-11-251h 06
Narcissist Apocalypse: Patterns of AbuseThe 4 Types of Boundaries | Narcissist Apocalypse Q&A With Juliane Taylor ShoreIn this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse Q&A, Brandon talks with Juliane Taylor Shore (LMFT, LPC) about the importance of setting boundaries, detailing four types: executed, psychological, containing, and physical. Juliane emphasizes the need for self-compassion and the gradual process of rebuilding trust. Plus they discuss Juliane's integrative therapy method, The STAIR Method.You can reach Juliane Taylor Shore by clicking here.You can buy Juliane Taylor Shore's book "Setting Boundaries that Stick" by clicking here.If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please click here or send...2024-11-0850 min
The Mental Health Coach | Coping Skills, Boundaries, Grief, Trauma, Marriage Counseling40: Setting Boundaries That Stick: Building Practices to Navigate Hard Moments and Build Authentic Relationships with Juliane Taylor ShoreWe know that boundaries are important, but figuring out what those boundaries should beâand how to enforce themâcan be challenging. In this episode, Iâm joined by my long-time mentor, friend, and colleague, Juliane Taylor Shore, therapist and author of Setting Boundaries That Stick. Together, we unpack the neuroscience of changing your brain, break down the four types of boundaries, and share a practical example of how setting a containing boundary can help you pause during moments of overwhelm, allowing you to show up in a way that feels more grounded, intentional, and in your integrity in your r...2024-09-261h 11
The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}EP 185: Setting Boundaries that Stick with Juliane Taylor Shore and Therapist UncensoredSomething new and unexpected here on The Baffling Behavior Show!This episode is actually from the Therapist Uncensored Podcast with Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley. Sue and Ann interviewed one of y'alls FAVORITES- Juliane Taylor Shore.Juliane was on The Baffling Behavior Show a long time ago, talking about psychological boundaries and verbal aggression. This is one of my most played episodes EVER.Juliane just published a new book on boundaries so when Sue and Ann asked if I wanted to do a podcast feed swap, I knew y'all would LOVE to hear...2024-07-021h 03
Why Does My PartnerFeel Better After UnloadingWhy do I have to feel bad for my partner to feel better? When does venting cross the line and become unloading? Guest host Ann Kelley joins us one more time to talk about power dynamics in relationships. It can feel relieving to unload your frustrations, but is it causing your partner to shut down? Or is the venting partner looking for some kind of feedback that theyâre not getting, making them feel like they have to keep unloading till they get a reaction? As always, thereâs not one answer, but we can offer a roadmap for how...2024-06-0429 minWhy Does My PartnerAdvice for Early Stage RelationshipsWeâre back with special guest Ann Kelley of the Therapist Uncensored podcast, and folks, sheâs dropping knowledge bombs left and right on this one. Our question for today is from a listener in her 60s, getting ready to put herself out there to date after a divorce. Weâve all got so much to say about this one, so letâs get right to the quotes:Quotes:The red flag is when we're not paying attention to something that's happening internally or we're dismissing part of our experience.Our value systems don't ha...2024-05-2825 min
Why Does My PartnerWhy Does My Partner Get Mad at Me When I Come Back from Out of Town?Welcome back to the Why Does My Partner Podcast. For this bonus mini-series, were joined by Ann Kelley from the Therapist Uncensored podcast to tackle our next set of listener questions. Ann is a licensed psychologist and co-author of Secure Relating along with her wife and podcasting partner, Sue Marriott.Do you and your partner have rituals when you come back together from being apart? Todayâs question opens up our to ways that implicit memories can stir up old learned expectations of what happens when someone leaves us. If youâve experienced painful separations in your past...2024-05-2128 min
Therapist Uncensored PodcastSetting Boundaries that Stick with Juliane Taylor Shore (229)Weâre back with long-time friend of the podcast and expert, Juliane Taylor Shore LMFT, LPC, SEP. As we reflect on our episode from six years ago on boundaries, we dive into new knowledge and how we can create boundaries that stick. Juliane Taylor Shore blends
her original methods like "the jello wall" with new research to share exciting and thoughtful insight on how through boundaries we can harness compassion in our relationships with others and ourselves.2024-03-1956 min
Therapist Uncensored PodcastSetting Boundaries that Stick with Juliane Taylor Shore (229)Weâre back with long-time friend of the podcast and expert, Juliane Taylor Shore LMFT, LPC, SEP. As we reflect on our episode from six years ago on boundaries, we dive into new knowledge and how we can create boundaries that stick. Juliane Taylor Shore blends
her original methods like "the jello wall" with new research to share exciting and thoughtful insight on how through boundaries we can harness compassion in our relationships with others and ourselves.2024-03-1956 min
The Couples Therapist Couch199: Brain Science and Relationships with Juliane Taylor ShoreLearn more about the Couples Therapist Inner Circle: https://www.couplestherapistcouch.com/inner-circle-new In this episode, Shane talks with Juliane Taylor Shore about how brain science plays into relationships. Juliane is an Educator, Therapist, and Writer inspiring people to shift their relationships with self, others, and the world. Sheâs the Author of âSetting Boundaries That Stick: How Neurobiology Can Help You Rewire Your Brain to Feel Safe, Connected, and Empowered.â Hear why the energy we put towards ourselves is so important, how the brain looks at safety, how our history influences every moment for us, external vs. in...2024-02-2750 min
Enneagram and MarriageHow Neurobiology Can Bring Safety, Empowerment, and Connection, w/Juliane Taylor Shore, LMFTOften you want so desperately to relate well and with joy together, but when a relational rupture happens, we don't know how to repair it with healthy shifts and boundaries. Here we are joined by neuroscience expert and licensed marriage and family therapist Juliane Taylor Shore to help us sort out how to handle more difficult experiences together. Juliane takes us through the heavy lifting of relationships at their best - and their worst - with comfort, empowerment, and a head, heart, and body approach to help us discover what we can do when we are lost and feeling...2024-02-2641 min
Making Polyamory WorkYour Brain on Boundaries with Juliane Taylor ShoreLibby is joined by author and therapist Juliane Taylor Shore to talk about internal boundaries and how crucial they are (even though they are often not talked about or overlooked when people talk about boundaries.)
Jules' Website: https://www.julianetaylorshore.com/
Jules Book, Setting Boundaries that Stick: https://bookshop.org/p/books/setting-boundaries-that-stick-how-neurobiology-can-help-you-rewire-your-brain-to-feel-safe-connected-and-empowered-juliane-taylor-shore/19642175
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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/makingpolywork/message2023-11-2844 min
Color of SuccessJuliane Taylor Shore: Did You Know Setting Boundaries Can Change Your Neurobiology? Juliane Taylor Shore and I discuss her new book, Setting Boundaries That Stick: How Neurobiology Can Help You Rewire Your Brain to Feel Safe, Connected, and Empowered, which explores: The need to consistently work on setting boundaries to see neurobiological change Decision-making as to whether to communicate a boundary to someone else Ways to self-soothe in times of distress ================================================= Full Bio: Juliane Taylor Shore (aka Jules) is a therapist, author and teacher who creates spaces for folx who want to face whatâs blocking them so that they can live lives full of se...2023-11-2029 min
Why Does My PartnerWhy Do I Take Care of My Partner When They Apologize To Me?Can remorse be empowering? Spoilers for todayâs question, which comes from a listener who finds themselves doing the comforting, when itâs their partner who was doing the apologizing. Whatâs up with that? Realizing that youâve hurt someone can bring up feelings of shame and guilt, especially when itâs someone you love. But letting that shame take over can take the focus off doing the repair work you and your partner need after that hurt. We discuss where that shame comes from, and how the alternative â remorse â actually helps you get out of feeling social threat and lets...2023-03-2121 min
Why Does My PartnerComplain When I Play GolfItâs a fun one today on the WDMP podcast as we answer a question thatâs sounds at first like itâs about hobbies and taking time for things we enjoy, but really gets down to how we distribute resources in our relationship. We discuss how conflicts over fairness can come up when one or both people in a couple are feeling depleted, anxious, or envious, and how to get out of that trap. Weâre talking skills like getting curious, making You-turns, and direct requests. Quotes: "if you're catching yourself in your part...2023-03-1415 min
Why Does My PartnerInterracial RelationshipsWelcome back to the WDMP Podcast. Instead of a regular question, today we're answering a listener's request to talk about the dynamics between interracial couples and the conflicts that arise from their cultural differences.We take it as an opportunity to slow down and acknowledge that there's so much that comes with this big, heavy topic. There's the weight of inherited hurt and oppression, the weight of silenced voices and marginalized bodies. Of trying to do things differently - maybe even better - than those who came before us. We discuss how this situation can be ripe...2023-03-0723 min
Why Does My PartnerGet Defensive and Justify a FriendshipWelcome back to the WDMP podcast! Here in our second episode of season 4, a listener brings us his concerns about his wifeâs friendship with a lesbian coworker. We get into topics like feeling dismissed, building trust, and navigating bumpy conversations with your partner where there are lots of tender feelings on both sides. We discuss how healthy boundary-setting isnât about controlling your partner, itâs about knowing your own limits of comfort, and talk about a way of negotiating boundaries with your partner that helps you both slow down, stay curious, and turn this conflict into an opport...2023-02-2821 min
Why Does My PartnerHave No Interest In Being More RelationalWeâre back with season four and starting off with the big ones. Todayâs question gets Jules, Vickey, and Rebecca asking, âwhat the heck does ârelationalâ even mean?â Itâs a word we use all the time here on the WDMP podcast, so could it really be that you and your partner could have totally different ideas of what it means to be relational? And if thatâs true, how do we turn that discovery into an opportunity to co-create our shared relational space?In true WDMP style, the answers we explore are equal parts brain science, you-tur...2023-02-2119 minThe Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}Ep. 115: Boundaries with Verbal Aggression with Juliane Taylor Shore: Boundaries with Connection Part 3 of 3In part 3 of this series on Boundaries with Connection, Juliane Taylor Shore talks us through how boundaries work in relationships with our children - relationships where we have to show up every day - and why it is so important for us to have good psychological boundaries when our children are verbally aggressive. In this episode, youâll learn:What are psychological boundariesHow do psychological boundaries help usWhy good psychological boundaries are important when a child is verbally aggressiveHow to create space between your mind and another's mindResources mentioned in this podcast:J...2023-02-211h 12
Why Does My Partnermake this a lover's day with yourselfHappy Valentine's Day! Are you ready for more Why Does My Partner? More is coming soon. Season 4 drops next week. We had to wish you a Happy Valentine's Day. Our hope is that at least some of you out there will make this a lover's day with yourself. Your relationship between you and you is a huge foundation for any other love relationship that you have. So even if it's only 5 minutes, send yourself a little love today. Take good care, we'll meet you back here next week. Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contact2023-02-1400 min
Why Does My PartnerNot Want to Make Love to MeWelcome back to the WDMP podcast and to the third episode in our Mini-Series on Choosing, Being Chosen and Belonging. This episode covers the topic of sexual intimacy in relationship, if that affects how, when, or if you choose to listen we want you to know that ahead of time. In this episode we're answering the question "Why Doesn't My Partner Want to Make Love to Me?" We're discussing rejection, expectations, and vulnerability. We're inviting listeners to wonder what happens in your body, or floating in the back of your mind, as you think about how likely...2022-12-1421 min
The Family Brain with Megan Gipson105 Boundaries Over the Holidays with Juliane Taylor ShoreEpisode 105: Boundaries Over the Holidays with Juliane Taylor ShoreJuliane Taylor Shore joins The Family Brain Podcast to talk about her work in helping people understand neuroscience, boundary setting and how both impact our relationships. Juliane breaks this information down in to digestible bites and helps make the term neurobiology not sound so intimidating. One of my big take aways from this conversation is that in addition to setting more action oriented boundaries like I will not continue to clean your clothes if you leave them on the floor, we can also set energetic boundaries in helping kee...2022-12-1350 min
Why Does My PartnerLook Outside for Things to Make Them Feel Good About ThemselfWelcome back to the WDMP podcast and to the second episode in our Mini-Series on Choosing, Being Chosen and Belonging.In this episode we're answering the question "Why Does My Partner Look Outside for Things to Make Them Feel Good About Themself?" In answering this question we're discussing self-worth and how self-worth is buoyed up if you have an inner sense that you're not-enough. We explore the ways we may replace our absence of experiencing belonging with attempts to "fit in" and explain the difference. Belonging celebrates us for all of the different aspects of ourselves, allowing...2022-12-0716 min
Why Does My PartnerPrefer to Keep the Status Quo of Distance in our RelationshipWelcome back to the WDMP podcast and to the first episode in our Mini-Series on Choosing, Being Chosen and Belonging.In this episode we're answering the question "Why Does My Partner Prefer to Keep the Status Quo of Distance in our Relationship?" We're talking about vulnerability, safety, and taking emotional risks without guarantee of outcome. We discuss how vulnerability is embedded in listening and receiving just as much as it is in sharing, the difference between provocative and responsible distance taking, and how to incorporate time-outs by developing a shared relational language. We also talk about a...2022-11-3021 min
Why Does My PartnerMood Influence My Mood So MuchDoes your partner ever give off an energy, even without saying anything, that rubs off on you? Maybe it makes you feel like theyâre mad at you, or you simply adopt the mood that theyâre in. In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca discuss the concept of âemotional contagionâ and why we are affected by the unspoken moods of others, and how to navigate and communicate about this issue in your relationship with your partner.This is our final episode of season 3, thanks for listening for 3 seasons! Stay tuned for our mini-series on worthlessness and belongin...2022-09-2725 min
Why Does My PartnerSay I'm Therapizing ThemIn this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca answer a listener who asks the following question: âRecently, when my partner and I have been having conflict, I try to come from a place of curiosity, talking to them and saying things that I've noticed and then asking why that might be. They tell me they feel I'm trying to be their therapist. I can understand why they could see it that way, but it's not my intention. I've told them it isn't my intention that I'm just trying to understand their point of view, but they say it feels like I...2022-09-2024 min
Why Does My PartnerSet Me Up To ReactIn this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca answer listener question: âWhy does my partner set me up to react when he makes controversial statements that are hurtful or mis-representational and expects that I don't react? And then when I react, he tells me that I'm being angry and that I'm wrong. And I always create a fuss about everything when I feel that if he had not said what he said, there wouldn't be an issue.â Is it about wanting to feel ârightâ? Can someone even make you feel a certain way? Is your interpretation about your partnerâs tone, word...2022-09-1323 min
Why Does My PartnerInterpret Disagreement As CriticismDoes it seem like your partner gets defensive and/or hurt most times when you disagree? Have you ever wondered what could be behind that feeling for them and how to create a space where you are still connected and feel safe even in moments of disagreement? In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca discuss what could be happening internally with your partner, ways to examine your own words and intentions, and how to diffuse potential conflict and hurt feelings in these moments using compassion and communication.Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contact2022-09-0619 min
Why Does My PartnerWant to Open Our RelationshipHave you or your partner ever wondered how about opening your relationship? In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca cover not only some of the many reasons partners might explore non-monogamy, how to communicate in a connected way about it, how to explore it carefullyâand how to express if it doesnât feel right for you. They share their experiences in working with a variety of partners in open relationships and offer resource material to help guide you through the world of consensual non-monogamy. Books referenced in this episode:Open Monogamy by Tammy Nelson2022-08-3020 min
Why Does My PartnerDo Things They Know Will Hurt MeHow can you connect while communicating to your partner when they say things that they know (or may not know) will hurt you? Are they trying to be mean and malicious? Are they just trying to get your attention? How do you request that they stop doing it without escalating the interaction? In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca analyze possible reasons why your partner might be doing this and how to ask them to stop doing it in a way that increases your understanding of each other.Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contact2022-08-2618 min
Why Does My PartnerAct Like Their Mother/FatherDoes your partner ever act like their mother or father? (Hint: we all do it sometimes.) In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca dive deep into this question and discover some truths that will make us rethink about not only why our partner does this, but how to interact with them when they doâand most importantlyâhow to use it as a chance to see your partner with more compassion and enhance connectedness.Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you want to dive in deeper, consider registering for our online Esse...2022-08-1620 min
Why Does My PartnerTreat Me Like Their Father/MotherDoes your partner ever make assumptions about you that are more aligned with their mother or father than they are with you? Or do they react to you sometimes the way they would to their parent? In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca tackle the topic of mimicking and modeling what a person grew up with and how extensive that mimicking can affect them on all levelsâespecially in romantic relationships. And be sure to tune in next week for the flip side of this question: âWhy does my partner act like their mother or father?âShare your q...2022-08-0923 min
Why Does My PartnerSee How Much I Do for ThemWhen we do something âfor our partnerâ...why are we doing it? Are we really doing it for them, or are we doing it for ourselves? Do you end up blaming your partner and calling them âungratefulâ, etc? Or do you sink into a shame pit and believe youâre not doing enough for them to be appreciated? In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca pull back the curtain and reveal some of the real reasons why this question is often self-focused and what we can learn about our relationship and about ourselves when we explore it.Share your...2022-08-0521 min
Why Does My PartnerMake Me Feel WorthlessFeeling worthless is always an awful experience no matter where the feeling originated, and itâs never okay to try to make someone else feel worthless. But are your partnerâs actions causing you to feel this way? Are they abusive, or could there be other factors at play? In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca get deep into some neuroscience to explain how our brains and bodies process emotions and thoughts to create stories in our headsâincluding those stories we carry around that determine how we feel about ourselves.Share your questions with us at whydoe...2022-07-2623 min
Why Does My PartnerSay They Are Focusing On Their âStuffâ ButâŠWhy does my partner say they are focusing on "their stuff" but it doesn't seem like they are from the outside? Why do they point the finger back at us and tell us to just focus on our own âstuffâ? In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca talk about several different reasons why youâre not seeing your partnerâs internal work, how different people go about doing their internal work, and how to use sharing about each otherâs âstuffâ instead of judging as an opportunity for vulnerability and deeper connection.Share your questions with us at whydoesmypa...2022-07-1916 min
Why Does My PartnerWhy Do I Have So Many Expectations of My Partner?We all want to avoid grief, but how do you handle it when your partner doesnât meet your expectations? Do you silently resent them? Do you take the chance of making a request? Or do you grieve and accept that youâre not going to get what you wanted? In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca discuss how to look inward to identify the possible sources of our expectations in relationships as well as better ways of communicating wants and needs to our partners.Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you...2022-07-1216 min
Why Does My PartnerStill Fight With Their ExWhat is it that sucks us into the ex-partner dynamic? Is it a need to be ârightâ? A fear of being vulnerable? Or repeating old patterns from your childhood because thatâs where you are most comfortable? In this episode, Jules, Vickey, and Rebecca answer the questions: âWhy does my partner keep fighting with their ex? Why is this difficult dynamic such a draw for my partner?â and âHow can I help my stepchild who is being affected by their parents arguing without overstepping?âShare your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you want to dive i...2022-07-0518 min
Why Does My PartnerPick Their Parents Over MeAfter money, sex, kids, time and cleaning, in-laws are another topic couples most commonly fight about. âWhy do you talk to your mother more than you talk to me? Your mom is in the middle of our relationship.â What could be behind this conflict? In this episode, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca discuss the several reasons why these issues occur; cultural differences, different familiesâ expectations of what a family relationship should look like, differences between what your new family wants you to do vs. your family of origin, and the fear of not belonging. Explore what âbelongingâ can look like for each p...2022-06-2815 min
Why Does My PartnerNot Validate What I'm Feeling When I'm UpsetâWhy doesn't my partner validate what I'm feeling when I'm upset?â The short answer is, because itâs really hard to do. Oftentimes in the moment, one or both of us is too upset to make a responsive choice rather than a reactionary one. But of course thereâs more to it than that. The key is in the ask itself. Is it a question of what is true? Or is it about being heard and understood? How do we validate our partners without invalidating our own feelings and subjective truth? But the magic in the ask is that often, when we...2022-06-2114 min
Why Does My PartnerHate Every Way I'm Different From ThemThis week, a listener asks, âWhy does my partner hate every way that I am different from them?â Difference is what makes us human, and how we respond to difference is such an integral part of the human experience. We experience it in our most intimate relationshipsâwith our partners or between siblings, for example. But itâs also at the forefront of our political climate and policy-making, culture clashes, religious wars, racism, sexism, you name it. There is a desire for ease and harmony in the question, but also an undercurrent of grandiosity, loneliness and disconnection. Listen in as Rebecca, V...2022-06-1417 min
Why Does My PartnerNot Want to Work on Our RelationshipRelationships can be hard, even healthy ones. They take work. So, what does it mean when one partner doesnât want to work on the relationship and the other does? Is it a sign that they care less than the other partner? Does it mean their efforts are being overlooked? How much effort and energy should a relationship take anyway? Putting forth extra effort to take a relationship to new places involves a certain amount of risk. Because what if it isnât reciprocated? Will one of you evolve faster than the other? What if, after all your efforts, the relatio...2022-06-0715 min
Why Does My PartnerWhy Canât I Decide To Stay Or Go?Have you ever been stuck in a place of indecision over what to do in a relationship? So many of us have. And for living in such a relational culture as we do, we arenât offered much modeling or wise guidance. Often, we absorb messages like âwhen theyâre the one, you just knowâ and âwhen theyâre the right person, even the hard stuff is easy.â We beg to differ! These adages might be true for some, but the reality is theyâre just not helpful for the rest of us, or worse, they can cause us a lot of confusion, f...2022-05-3122 min
Why Does My PartnerHave an AffairWhen we think of the concept of cheating, typically a sexual affair comes to mind. But that is only one form of cheating out of a myriad of ways. Ultimately, cheating is a betrayal, a breach of agreement. And too often, our agreements arenât well communicated. The risk then is that there are differing ideas of the agreements in placeâin other words, an unspoken disagreement in place, with a high chance of someone feeling betrayed sooner or later. But sometimes, our agreements are clearly communicated and we still fall short of expectations. It happens. We have all done it, ev...2022-05-2420 min
Why Does My PartnerCorrect (Almost) Everything I SayWe all have had the experience of being corrected by someone else. Often, it doesnât feel so great. It can make us wonder whatâs inherently wrong with us or why they canât just let us own our thoughts and feelings. Itâs also very likely that weâve been the one correcting another before and might not have even noticed that weâd done it. Why do we correct others? And what are we to do with their correction when someone puts it on us? Turns out, thereâs quite an array of reasons why we might correct someon...2022-05-1719 min
Why Does My PartnerSHUT DOWN MINI-SERIES: Why Does My Partner Shut Down When Big Feelings are Present?Last week, in this miniseries on shutdowns, we talked about shutting down in the middle of an argument. This week, weâre talking about shutting down from a slightly different angle: When one of us in the relationship is having big, vulnerable feelings. It can feel scary or vulnerable to express a need or emotion we have, even outside of conflict. So, letâs dig deeper. In this episode, we discuss some differences in why you might shut down when you have big feelings versus why you might shut down when your partner has big feelings, and what these look and...2022-03-3116 min
Why Does My PartnerSHUT DOWN MINI-SERIES: Why Does My Partner Shut Down During an Argument?If your partner tends to shut down in the middle of an argument, the reason why is simple. However, often the simplest things are also the most complicated. This week, letâs dig into the varied reasons underneath the simple surface layer and discuss what can be done about it. Shutting down can become embedded in the relational dance between us and our partners, a spiraling chain of events in which you both circle back on repeat patterns while traveling forward at the same time. But with some tracking and self-awareness, you can begin to change the steps of your...2022-03-2420 min
The Couples Therapist Couch168: Neurobiology and Relationships with Juliane Taylor ShoreIn this episode, my friend and fellow Relational Life Therapist, Juliane Taylor Shore, talks about Neurobiology and Relationships. If you are a couples therapist, you probably know a lot about things that work to make couples feel more connected and healthy in their lives and relationships. Jules sheds light on the science of "why" therapy works. Find out more at cleariskind.com The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. Pl...2022-03-2248 min
Why Does My PartnerSHUT DOWN MINI-SERIES: Why Do I Shut Down When Things Get Heavy?Shutdowns can look and feel different for each of us. Sometimes deep and immediate, sometimes a slow drip toward isolation. Numbness, wordlessness, sometimes seething, sometimes out-of-body. We all shut down sometimes, even if it isnât our usual modus operandi. But why do they happen in the first place? And what can we do about them? It all starts with noticing. In Part One of our series on shutdowns, we talk about trauma responses in the body and our developing brain throughout the life cycleâit turns out our brains donât stop developing after adolescence. We share our personal expe...2022-03-1628 min
Why Does My PartnerSHUT DOWN MINI-SERIES: IntroductionDear listeners, we have a little surprise for you while weâre in between seasons. We have created a 3-part series on âshut-downsâ in relationships and will roll out segments of the series over the course of the next few weeks.  To start, this week, we have an introduction for you on shut-downs: We discuss why shutting down during hard conversations might be the worst thing you can do in a relationship over the long term. We discuss different types of shutting down (perhaps one or all of them will sound familiar?) And, because shutting down is so common i...2022-03-0816 min
Why Does My PartnerNot Talk About What is Good Between UsDonât we all just want to hear a little good news, a little âthank youâ, or get a high-five once in a while? Why do so many of us focus on what's not working, rather than what is? Rounding out season two, Rebecca, Vickey and Jules discuss one of their most favorite relational skillsâcherishing. In this episode, you'll learn how to do it, when to do it (hint: often and in the moment!), and why it's so important for all of the relationships in your life. You'll also learn why it can be very hard for many of us to...2022-01-2738 min
Why Does My PartnerWant Me to Tell Them What's Happening in My TherapyAsking your partner about what happened in their therapy session is, regardless of their reason, basically an ask for more vulnerability. Itâs normal for partners to be interested in whatâs going on for the other. Often we just want to know that one of us isnât outgrowing the other. The potential for boundary crossings is great here, but so is the potential for relational growth as a couple. This week, Rebecca, Jules and Vickey discuss the nuanced differences between curiosity and a need for control, how and why you should have a meta conversation around this, and the ke...2022-01-2018 min
Why Does My PartnerWhy Isn't My Partner the Same as When I Met Them?If youâve been with your partner for a while, youâve probably already noticed that theyâre not quite the same person they were when you first fell for them. They might even seem like a completely different person from the one you met so long ago. So where did they go? Because you know them so intimately, you can still kind of track remnants in their face or get a brief flicker of that former self in an expression, a gesture, a laugh. But, seriously, whatâs going on here? Who is this person now and what happened to t...2022-01-1317 min
Why Does My PartnerNot Try to Understand When I'm UpsetThis weekâs episode is a companion to last weekâs conversation, where we talked about why our partners might not share when theyâre upset. This week, a listener asks: Why doesnât my partner try to understand when Iâm upset? What it ultimately boils down to is listening, really listening, is actually really hard! Vickey, Rebecca and Jules break this all down for you to explain what the goal of listening actually is, how to do it well, and how to know when youâve stopped listening. And for the speaker, theyâve got some tips for how and why y...2022-01-0618 min
Why Does My PartnerNot Tell Me When They're UpsetThe thing about conflict is that very few of us were given a model of how to work through it in an effective or healthy way. Some of us grew up in a home where conflict just didnât happen, and so we grow up at a loss for what to do or assume that any conflict means a relationship is doomed. Some of us grew up in homes where there was a lot of conflict and it wasnât handled in healthy ways, leaving us with a set of bad relational habits or some defense mechanisms and fear that m...2021-12-3024 min
Why Does My PartnerLove Seem ConditionalIs adult love conditional? This is one of those deeper questions we all encounter at some point in our lives. Itâs one that we all might have our own answer to, but we donât have to agree on a shared answer in order to be in relationship with each other. This week, our asker wants to know, âWhy does my partnerâs love seem conditional?â Jules, Vickey and Rebecca respond to this question by addressing the conditionality of adult love and what that might mean, and also what it means when âseemâ is the operative. This is a question that en...2021-12-2316 min
Why Does My PartnerNot Accept Our DifferencesPerhaps one of the loneliest existential questions we can ask is whether or not we can ever truly be known by someone. Thereâs grief in there, when we realize that this desire can never be fully met. Sometimes we avoid or deny this truth, which is what this weekâs question touches on: âWhy doesnât my partner accept our differences?â Certainly, we can bond over our similarities. Thatâs easy. But the real adventure and the real risk is in our differences. Perhaps the irony lies in that by simply being curious about our differences, for a mere moment and thr...2021-12-1619 min
Why Does My PartnerThink Iâm Useless, No Good, Unhealthy When We FightThis week, a listener asks, âWhen we fight, why does my partner think Iâm useless, no good, unhealthy?â When you and your partner fight, you might have your own list of adjectives that come to mind. Whatever they are, the answer to this question applies to all of them. The response is hefty but so worth it, because when we are able to upend this with a new skill, the results are so incredibly profound. Rebecca, Vickey and Jules explain a bit of the brain science behind our Core Negative Images of our partners and how our implicit memory sy...2021-12-0925 min
Why Does My PartnerMake Hurtful CommentsWeâve all likely said something hurtful out of anger to someone we love at some point in our lives. Thereâs a slew of reasons why we do it, but âbecause itâs the truthâ is only sometimes one of them. Being on the receiving end of a hurtful comment, the sting can make it hard to respond well. But if we can pause just enough before responding to check in on our psychological boundaries, then we can filter whatâs true and about us from whatâs not true and about them. We can set limits when appropriate. We c...2021-12-0221 min
Why Does My PartnerNot Get Weâre Not Actually ConnectingWe believe everyone who's ever been in a relationship has experienced this question! Maybe it's a lack of observation about the dynamics between you. Maybe they do know, but you don't know that they know. Really though, itâs probably just that you have different connection styles and haven't yet decoded the different ways each of you experience what connection is. Jules takes us deep into brain science to help us understand how our history-colored glasses affect our experiences of what connection is. And once again, we're encouraging you to have meta-conversations. Observe what connection feels like to each of...2021-11-2528 min
Why Does My PartnerCut Me OffWhen it comes to the topic of interjecting or cutting someone off in a conversation, we all know which side we tend to fall on. Some of us are serial cutter-offers. Some of us are the ones getting cut off. For those in the latter group, it can be incredibly frustrating at times. We might feel like we arenât being listened to or that we are being dismissed. But for those doing the cutting offâŠÂ Well, thereâs not always a clear simple reason for why they do it. In fact, there are a lot of reasons why someone might...2021-11-1813 min
Why Does My PartnerRefuse To ApologizeThis weekâs question âWhy does my partner refuse to apologize?â is a big one. Partly because weâve all found ourselves in the position of not wanting or outright refusing to apologize to someone. Weâve all been that person, probably more than once. And weâve all been the person on the receiving end of an apologyâor the absence of an apology. Weâve felt that vulnerability in calling attention to our hurt, and hopefully, weâve all experienced the repair and connection from an apology well-stated. So, why is such a basic, everyday thing so complicated and infrequ...2021-11-1124 min
Why Does My PartnerNot See They Are Being HypocriticalWhy is it so hard to see when we are being hypocritical about something? Some say that humans are contradictory by nature, so perhaps we are all hypocritical from time to time. Itâs just hard to see outside of our personal vantage point. It takes a little imagination, curiosity and maybe even a little effort toward trying a different approach. And when we are calling out the hypocrisy in one another, we need to understand what the desire underneath it is. Ultimately, if both sides can drop the defensiveness, the conversation transforms. Listen in as Jules, Vickey and Rebecca...2021-11-0412 minWhy Does My PartnerNeed To Fix MeSometimes in a relationship, one of us thinks we need to fix the other. There are a few moving parts here. In terms of social conditioning, often women learn that this is how they get what they need in a relationship. But itâs not always or only that. Thereâs also a piece around how we deal with trauma and a piece around the partnerâs response to being fixed. What often lies underneath is a feeling of âWhat does he/she think is wrong with me?â If this rings true in your relationship, Vickey, Jules and Rebecca are ready with a...2021-10-2822 minWhy Does My PartnerNot Comfort MeThis week, find out what we mean when we say sometimes you just âcanât magic the milkâ. Comfort means different things to different people. In this episode, we discuss the many nuanced reasons why we might not get what we need when we are stressed and in need of comfort and what weâve come to expect from others in those moments. Thereâs a bit of attachment theory in here, but forget what you think you know about attachment theory. Weâre breaking it down into easily digestible terms and reflect on the ways in which our expectations shi...2021-10-2146 minWhy Does My PartnerNot Accept What They Did Was WrongThis week, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca talk about whatâs really going on when we or our partners canât admit wrongdoing. It turns out that we all have unique, complex personal histories with what happens when someone admits they made a mistake and why we might refuse or withhold that admission. This succinct yet powerful conversation offers a U-turn for both parties in a relationship that can shift the trajectory of the disagreement toward connection and safety, while ultimately asking the question, âIs forgiveness possible if we donât agree that you were wrong?âShare your questions wi...2021-10-1411 minWhy Does My PartnerExpect Sex In The MorningWhat is sex about? What is it for? Many things, of courseâpleasure and connection just being two of them. So what happens when there is an expectation or a mismatch in preferences? Can we talk about it with openness and curiosity? Or do we get pouty, irritable or retaliatory? It is inevitable that there will be times when our partners want sex when we are not in the mood or vice versa. When that happens, it is important to make the distinction that this rejection is not a rejection of the person. Itâs just not what feels right in th...2021-10-0725 minWhy Does My PartnerNot Understand The TraumaHow is it that two people can live through the same thing and one person experiences it as traumatic and the other person experiences it in a completely different way? The answer is often a combination of personal history, the language we use to process it, and DNA. But perhaps the stickier question regarding trauma and relationships is, Why donât you understand that this was traumatic for me? Itâs such a vulnerable ask and there is a root skill that is absolutely key here: It requires us to cultivate our âsecond consciousnessâ, which is where our relational skills live...2021-09-3023 minWhy Does My PartnerAccuse Me Of CheatingThis week, Jules, Vickey, and Rebecca consider the many reasons why our partners might worry that we are cheating on them. The question really is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to how our thinking brains handle unknowns--fears, worries, insecurities. Our partnerâs implicit memories can be triggered by an action without them even being aware of it. Or we may not know how to handle their insecurity, so the things we do out of a desire to protect them may come off as sketchy instead. Whatever the reason, the silver lining is always the opportunity for a...2021-09-2313 min
Why Does My PartnerMarry MeSooner or later, everyone reaches a point in their relationship when they ask, âWhy did my partner even marry me at all? Why are they with me?â Itâs a question that typically comes up when things have been hard for a while, which--surprise!--is completely normal. Modern committed relationships are a spiritual journey. There is a reason why we choose partners that stir up our stuff. This week, Jules, Vickey and Rebecca share what comes up for them with this question, the wisdom theyâve accrued from making it through the other side of this tough phase in their own mar...2021-09-1617 minTherapist Uncensored PodcastHow Good Boundaries Bring Us Closer (Replay) with Juliane Taylor ShoreInterpersonal co-regulation requires boundary-setting. Therapist Uncensored co-hosts Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott join the founder of IPNB Psychotherapy of Austin, Dr. Juliane Taylor Shore, in a discussion on interpersonal neurobiology and regulation. Weâll explore the three types of boundaries, how to co-create them plus how to stay regulated using internalized relationships with the self.2021-08-1852 minWhy Does My PartnerNot Want To Go To TherapyLetâs talk about different options when it comes to therapy, get honest about what therapy feels like and help support you in going after what you want if therapy is right for you. We also get curious about the differences between requests and demands and look at practices that would support both options.That wraps up season 1 of the Why Does My Partner podcast. Weâll be working behind the scenes on season 2, and enjoying time off with our loves. Expect season 2 in mid-September 2021. In the meantime, do continue sending us your questions for future episodes and e...2021-07-1518 minWhy Does My PartnerBlame Me For EverythingDoes your partner blame you for a ton of stuff? Whether you are the blamer or the blame this episode is sure to help. In this one we help you think through assessing whatâs blaming and whatâs not. We hope to inspire you to trade in loving firmness for harshness. Letâs look at how blame hurts the person holding it as well as the person receiving it. Weâll talk about not taking things personally, boundaries and clarity with love. By the end of this one youâre gonna want to carry Qtips in your pocket.Share your...2021-07-0819 minWhy Does My PartnerSay They Donât RememberWhat happens when a situation is feeling unfair? What if there are skills and deficits in each of you that are different...what if those differences drive you crazy? Weâll face grief, talk about direct requests and face how hard it can be to live with each other and negotiate shared space. What can we do to embody love towards ourselves and each other even while we face these challenges? We have answers, thoughts and ways to stoke the ambers of your own curiosity in this one.Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contact...2021-07-0118 minWhy Does My PartnerGet So EmotionalIn this episode we take on the question "why does my partner get so emotional? Emotions are annoying and they don't serve a purpose anyway." And our answer begins with the science behind why emotions do matter and why they will run your life. Humans are meaning-making creatures and emotions play a vital role in that process. We are feeling beings, the question is: are we conscious of it or not? We nerd out on the fascinating brain science, including how logic and emotion work together to calm the brain. The skills lie in how to best get the...2021-06-2421 minWhy Does My PartnerWhy Donât I Compliment My Partner More?We love this question from someone wondering about whatâs going on inside them when they don't compliment their partner. And we take it as an invitation to explore Us Consciousness: Are you âMe focusâ or âUs focusâ? Do you know if your agenda is connection or protection? It's a knowing that â how youâre doing, how Iâm doing, how we are together â are all of equal importance. We also take a look at how compliments are received, what happens if your compliments fall into a black hole, and if withholding the compliment is a retaliation move. We discuss skills to...2021-06-1712 min
Why Does My PartnerSuckCan we talk about normal marital hatred? Yes, thatâs true it is normal. We explore the three phases of a long term relationship, look at how to hold each other in warm regard even as we suck and get curious about why our partner gets up our bum so badly. Can you hold yourself and your partner in love even when you do sucky human things? We explore what makes it so hard and give tips on how to get better.Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you want to dive...2021-06-1014 minWhy Does My PartnerSmack My @$$Letâs talk about touch, intimate touch, fun touch, how we communicate to our partners what touch we enjoy. This is a light and fun episode and yes, we do talk about sex. Weâll get into how to learn about your own and each other's touch preferences, communicating about touch and enthusiastic consent.  Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you want to dive in deeper, consider registering for our online Essential Skills Relationship Bootcamp. Open to individuals, couples and therapists. Learn more at whydoesmypartner.com/eventsThis podcast is not a...2021-06-0310 minWhy Does My PartnerPast Bother MeIn this one, we look at layers of how this might be an issue. We share a few different things that might be coming up for you and we talk about ways to soothe yourself and trust yourself. We all struggle with the stories we create about each other, lets dive in and think about how to radically love ourselves and trust ourselves as we journey into the vulnerability of partnership.Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you want to dive in deeper, consider registering for our online Essential Skills Relationship B...2021-05-2716 minWhy Does My PartnerGet So UpsetHow do we handle differences with our partners? Are we excited by them? Are we drawn to them? Are we repelled by them? We explore the stress we are under, dealing with loneliness and looking at one of the difficult catch 22âs of partnership. We share tools about how to not take things personally and learn to expand our understanding and compassion of each other and our differences.Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you want to dive in deeper, consider registering for our online Essential Skills Relationship Bootcamp. Open to indiv...2021-05-2011 minWhy Does My PartnerNot Think About Everything That Needs To Get Done The Way I DoWe talk about over functioning and under functioning in this episode. This is a common dynamic in many partnerships. We tackle invisible work, emotional labor and gender roles. Yes we will weigh in on patriarchy and talk about relational health and power dynamics. Do you know how to function in your relationship in a stance of sharing equal power with your partner? This episode we share ideas about how healthy âpower withâ thinking is and share ideas about how to create a healthy dynamic with empowering each other in your relationship.Share your questions with us at: whyd...2021-05-1326 minWhy Does My PartnerPick A Fight When They Want To ConnectWe donât shy away from the complexity that is human beings in this episode. Buckle in for an extended episode, weâll dive deep into the science and into what relational skills will work. How can we take in things when they are good? What does compassion have to do with calming my feelings? Can rage really be a bid for connection? We talk about many levels of the subconscious mind and how many ways we can answer this question. We will share practices that will help you develop 2nd consciousness, how to track yourself as a practice and cr...2021-05-0647 minWhy Does My PartnerLaugh With Their Friends More Than MeIn this episode, weâll explore humor, the stories we tell ourselves and how fast those stories lead to reactivity. Do our stories about whatâs happening in our love lives help us or cost us or both? Letâs explore how to find our stories, come into relationship with them and be more vulnerable and close with each other. Plus, weâll cover compassion and why it helps calm us down.Share your questions with us at: whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you want to dive in deeper, consider registering for our online Essential Skills Relationsh...2021-04-2919 minWhy Does My PartnerTell Me What To DoIn this episode, we talk about Boundaries and so much more. Do we absorb too much? Or is nothing getting through? If our Boundaries are in place, weâre able to be curious and see the deeper needs under our partnerâs behavior. Youâll hear us learn more about each other and model curiosity, rather than defensiveness. And we review one of our favorite skills, moving from Demand to Direct RequestâŠbecause the simplest answer to this question is that itâs vulnerable to make a direct request.Share your questions with us at: whydoesmypartner.com/contact2021-04-2223 minWhy Does My PartnerNot Follow ThroughWhy do we say yes when we donât mean it? Do we know our own answers? Can we be vulnerable and can we allow our partner to be vulnerable? This episode is chock-full of skills: not saying yes when we mean no, making direct requests, not demanding, speaking truth, using psychological boundaries and creating your own boundary images, differentiating between agenda, strategy and needs, allowing for a No. Donât be fooled, this is not a fully serious episode, in spite of all of those skills. Join us for tons of giggles too.Share your questions with...2021-04-1527 minWhy Does My PartnerGet So DefensiveDefensiveness in relationships is normal and something all of us experience at one time or another. In this episode, we discuss the things that could be behind that defensiveness. Are you communicating with your partner in a way that is coming off judgmental or attacking? Is your partner feeling hurt or scared? We explore the common root of defensiveness, hurt and fear, and learn healthy ways to navigate our relationships through these moments of discord into greater intimacy.Share your questions with us at: whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you want to dive in deeper, consider...2021-04-0813 minWhy Does My PartnerKeep Forgetting My Love LanguageCan we go deeper with love languages? Your hosts have 3 different views on how helpful love languages are and we discuss it with no holds barred and collaboration. Today we focus on skills that come out of this space: directness, making agreements and meta conversations. These are advanced skills for any couple.For those who donât know what âThe 5 Love Languagesâ are, it is a concept and book by Dr Gary Chapman. His premise is that everyone has a primary âlanguageâ and that if you speak one language and your partner speaks another, you cannot understand each other...2021-04-0113 minWhy Does My PartnerAct Like A Child SometimesNeuroscience will bring compassion to us all! Letâs learn what the brain does and what to do in response to the brain doinâ what it does. Weâll be talking about learning to watch our minds and bodies in real time. And weâll be hitting these topics: Relational Health + Compassion + Equal Worth + Right Responsibility- boom!Share your questions with us at: whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you want to dive in deeper, consider registering for our online Essential Skills Relationship Bootcamp. Open to individuals, couples and therapists. Learn more at WhyDoesMyPartner.comThis podcast...2021-03-2513 minWhy Does My PartnerNot Read My MindThis is one of the most common questions we get in our offices. If my partner really knew me wouldnât they get me? This episode we consider being known, grief, checking our expectations and finding vulnerability. Weâll be trouble-shooting ways to get met and go deeper with your partner.Share your questions with us at: whydoesmypartner.com/contactIf you want to dive in deeper, consider registering for our online Essential Skills Relationship Bootcamp. Open to individuals, couples and therapists. Learn more at WhyDoesMyPartner.comThis podcast is not a substitute for the...2021-03-1812 minWhy Does My PartnerLie About Little ThingsIn this episode, weâre tackling the question âWhy does my partner lie to me?â We look at both sides of the issue: "why might I be lying" and "what might I be creating that leads my partner to lie?" It is always a good idea to look at your own behaviors as well as your partnerâs. We also talk about the importance of accountability. And we introduce different stages of a relationship, how to work through the times of disharmony, and why disharmony is actually beneficial and mandatory for a healthy relationship.Share your questions with us...2021-03-1113 minWhy Does My PartnerWDMP Your Questions = Relational GoldWhoo-hoo! This is our inaugural episode of the Why Does My Partner podcast and we are super excited to share it with you. We're your hosts, Jules, Rebecca, and Vickey. We are all couple therapists and we met just before (literally) the pandemic shut down while training in Mexico with our mentor, Terry Real. In this trailer episode we're sharing the story of how we met, how we've come to work together, how this podcast came to be, and what you can expect in future episodes. We're calling this podcast Why Does My Partner (or Why Doesn't...2021-03-1114 minWhy Does My PartnerLoad The Dishwasher WrongThis episode uses the question âWhy Does My Partner Load the Dishwasher Wrongâ to look at how couples handle the differences between them and ways to get curious rather than defensive. We discuss what goes on for us when we respond in unhealthy ways and how to flip our responses into relational health.Share your questions with us at: whydoesmypartner.com/contactï»żIf you want to dive in deeper, consider registering for our online Essential Skills Relationship Bootcamp. Open to individuals, couples and therapists. Learn more at WhyDoesMyPartner.comThis podcast is not a subst...2021-03-1112 min
Connectfulness PracticeThe Science Behind How Your Relationship Can Help You Heal with Juliane Taylor ShoreWeâre excited to bring Juliane Taylor Shore, LPC, LMFT, SEP (AKA Jules) back to the podcast â last time she joined us, on episode 18, Jules introduced us to the brain science around how to stay relational when our protective systems are activated during times of chaos, like these. In this episode weâre talking about how your relationship can help you healâŠand the brain science behind why and how it works. Expect lots of delicious neurobiological explanations around how healing occurs in the subcortical system. Jules says that healing trauma means what was, is not what a...2020-09-151h 20
Connectfulness PracticeWelcoming our Protective Systems in a Disorienting World with Juliane Taylor ShoreJuliane Taylor Shore, LPC, LMFT, SEP (AKA Jules) joins Rebecca to discuss the impact of being quarantined at home, experiencing isolation, fear and grief. How these experiences work in tandem with our implicit memory systems, and the effect it all has on our relationships. It's such a quick process, we canât preempt it. Instead the focus shifts towards slowing down and coming into enough relationship with ourselves that our brains hook back on. In order hold this level of fear and grief, we need to practice a lot of grace around how often we al...2020-04-171h 17