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Showing episodes and shows of
Kayla Reilly
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Not Your Therapist
BONUS: Love Island UK Season 12 — A Therapist Breaks Down Harrison, Lauren & Toni
Send us a textEver found yourself drawn to someone who couldn't quite decide if they wanted you? The Harrison-Lauren-Tony love triangle from Love Island UK Season 12 offers a perfect case study in toxic relationship patterns that might feel eerily familiar.This captivating analysis breaks down the psychological dynamics at play when a charming but emotionally withholding person keeps multiple partners on the hook. Harrison's classic avoidant attachment style—complete with ambiguous feelings, surface-level connection, and an "I'm still deciding" approach—creates the perfect storm of manipulation. Through intermittent reinforcement (the same psychological principle that make...
2025-07-21
08 min
Not Your Therapist
#28 Emotional Incest: When Parents Cross the Line
Send us a textHave you ever felt responsible for a parent's emotional wellbeing? Been called "the only one they can talk to" or "their rock"? That special closeness you felt might actually have been something therapists call emotional incest—a hidden form of boundary violation that shapes how we connect with others well into adulthood.Emotional incest occurs when a parent turns to their child to fulfill emotional needs typically reserved for adult relationships. Unlike physical or sexual abuse, it's often disguised as love, creating confusion for survivors who struggle to recognize its harmful ef...
2025-07-21
16 min
Not Your Therapist
#27 The Only Child – Mature, Independent… and Maybe a Little Emotionally Overloaded
Send us a textWere you the only child who was “so mature for your age”—but never really got to be a kid? In this episode, we dive into what it’s really like growing up without siblings and how that shapes your identity, relationships, and emotional habits as an adult.Drawing from birth order psychology and Family Systems Theory, we explore how only children miss the sibling subsystem—your first environment for social learning—and what happens when you become the emotional container for your entire family. From hyper-independence to emotional overload, th...
2025-06-30
20 min
Not Your Therapist
#26 The Youngest Child – Fun, Free-Spirited, or Forever the Baby?
Send us a textAre you the youngest child who’s always been seen as “the fun one”—but never quite taken seriously? In this episode of Not Your Therapist, we’re breaking down the psychology of the youngest child: how being the “baby” of the family shapes your personality, relationships, and sense of identity.We explore how youngest kids often become the entertainer or escape artist, the impact of being underestimated, and how this birth order role can lead to charm, deflection, and hidden pressure to prove yourself in adulthood. It’s not all fun and...
2025-06-23
19 min
Not Your Therapist
#25 The Middle Child – Chameleon, Peacemaker, or Just Forgotten?
Send us a textWere you the middle child—the one who stayed out of the way, kept the peace, and quietly handled your own emotional needs? You’re not alone. In this episode of Not Your Therapist, we dive deep into the psychology of middle child syndrome, emotional distancing, and why so many middle children become chronic people-pleasers or “distancers” in adulthood.We’ll talk about how middle children are shaped by their role in the family, what happens when your needs are ignored, and how that invisibility can turn into emotional walls late...
2025-06-16
22 min
Not Your Therapist
#24 The Eldest Child – CEO in Training or Resentful Parent #2?
Send us a textAre you the firstborn and secretly exhausted? You’re not alone. In this episode, we dive deep into the eldest child experience—how being the “responsible one” often leads to perfectionism, people-pleasing, burnout, and emotional overfunctioning in adulthood.If you were basically a third parent growing up, this one’s for you. We’ll talk about parentification, high-achiever syndrome, and how to start setting boundaries with the roles you’ve outgrown.Keywords: eldest child traits, birth order psychology, parentified child, high-achiever burnout, therapy podcast, perfectionism, family dynamic...
2025-06-10
22 min
Not Your Therapist
#23 Why Birth Order Actually Matters (Yes, Even If You’re 35 and Over It)
Send us a textDid your family birth order shape your personality? Spoiler: yep. In this episode, we explore how birth order influences your identity, temperament, and adult relationships. Whether you're the eldest child, middle child, youngest, or only child, this episode helps you understand how your role in the family still shows up in your life today.You’ll learn the psychology behind birth order, what patterns to look for, and how to break free from the expectations you never asked for.👉 Ask me a question or suggest a topic...
2025-06-04
17 min
Not Your Therapist
#22 Why Rest Feels Impossible: Understanding Your Productivity Addiction
Send us a textEver feel like you're constantly running on a productivity treadmill, unable to step off without experiencing overwhelming guilt and anxiety? You're not alone. What looks like ambition and high achievement might actually be anxiety masquerading as motivation – and over time, it can evolve into something more concerning.In this revealing episode, we explore how childhood messages about productivity and worth create deeply ingrained neural pathways that follow us into adulthood. When our parents or caregivers unconsciously taught us that our value comes from what we accomplish rather than who we are, we...
2025-05-19
15 min
Not Your Therapist
#21 Validate Yourself in 3 Steps and Build Confidence
Send us a textEver hit a milestone and still feel... kinda hollow? Or find yourself needing everyone else’s opinion before you can trust your own? Been there. And spoiler alert: It’s not because you’re broken.It’s because most of us were raised in homes where self-validation wasn’t modeled—so now we second-guess everything from our feelings to our freaking lunch order. In this episode, I’m breaking down why learning to validate yourself is the foundation for real confidence, calm, and clarity.We’ll talk about:Why “o...
2025-05-12
14 min
Not Your Therapist
#20 Emotional Invalidation: Why You Feel Small In Your Own Family
Send us a textThe quiet dismissal of your feelings? That sh*t cuts deeper than yelling ever could.When someone avoids eye contact, scrolls their phone mid-convo, or chuckles at your story like it’s a joke—they might not say anything cruel, but your nervous system still gets the memo: You don’t matter here.After a recent family visit left me feeling invisible and low-key spiraling, I had to unpack the slow-burn pain of emotional invalidation. If you grew up in a family where your feelings were ignored, mocked, or met wi...
2025-05-05
16 min
Not Your Therapist
#19 Divorced But Not Damaged: What NOT to Do If You Don’t Want to Mess Up Your Kids with Dr. Larry Waldman
Send us a textDr. Larry Waldman brings decades of forensic psychology experience to this raw, insightful conversation about the hidden casualties of divorce – the children caught in the crossfire between warring parents. Drawing from twenty years as the expert judges called on during high-conflict custody battles, Dr. Waldman exposes the psychological damage inflicted when parents prioritize their hurt feelings over their children's wellbeing."Kids are born naked and naive. What they see in their home, as far as they're concerned, is their reality," Dr. Waldman explains. When that reality fractures during divorce, children experience pr...
2025-04-28
54 min
Not Your Therapist
#18 Career Burnout Is Real—Here’s How to Bounce Back with Dr. Jesseca Tighe
Send us a textAre you staring at your calendar wondering how you'll face another workday? That crushing exhaustion isn't just tiredness—it's burnout, and it's reached epidemic levels among high-achievers and caregivers.In this eye-opening conversation with psychologist Dr. Jessica Tai, we dive into the science behind workplace burnout, revealing why it's now an official diagnosis with three distinct types that affect us differently. From the frenetic burnout that drives us to check emails during family dinner to the worn-out burnout that makes everything feel urgent, we unpack the hidden symptoms our culture has no...
2025-04-21
30 min
Not Your Therapist
#17 Struggling to Be Heard? How to Improve Communication in Love + Life with Erin Darden
Send us a textEver wondered why it's so hard to simply ask for what you need in relationships? Former attorney turned emotional intelligence coach Erin Darden brings clarity to this struggle, revealing how societal expectations, fear of rejection, and our own internalized guilt create barriers to honest communication."You can't pour from an empty cup, but women do it all the time," Erin observes, highlighting how many women see advocating for their needs as selfish rather than essential. Through our conversation, she unpacks the psychological and social factors that keep women silent, offering practical...
2025-04-14
43 min
Not Your Therapist
#16 Emotional Intimacy in Long-Term Relationships: What You’re Missing and How to Get It Back with Amy Phillips LCSW
Send us a textStruggling to feel close to your partner in a long-term relationship? Tired of fighting about the same things over and over—like dishes, chores, or who's doing bedtime? You’re not alone—and the issue probably isn’t what you think it is.In this episode of Not Your Therapist, I sit down with couples and individual therapist Amy Phillips, one of our seasoned clinicians at Evolution Wellness in Wilmington, NC. We dive deep into what drives emotional intimacy in long-term relationships, why couples often feel disconnected over time, and what to do wh...
2025-04-07
39 min
Not Your Therapist
#15 Where’s the Manual? Navigating Motherhood & Finding Community with Amanda Hofmann, The Wilmington Mom
Send us a textWhen Amanda Hofmann became a mom in January 2020—just as the world shut down—her life took a wild turn. A seasoned event planner suddenly found herself navigating new motherhood, postpartum anxiety, and total isolation. So what did she do? She strapped her baby into a stroller, started walking the parks of Wilmington, NC… and accidentally created one of the most loved parenting resources in the area: The Wilmington Mom.In this episode, Amanda and I get real about what it actually feels like to become a mom—and how n...
2025-03-31
37 min
Not Your Therapist
#14 Self-Worth, Diet Culture, and Breaking Free from Food Guilt with Emma Townsin
Send us a textYour Body Isn’t the Enemy—It’s Fighting for YouDiet culture has fed us a lie: that thinness equals health, worth, and discipline. But what if everything you’ve been taught about food and your body is wrong? Specialist eating disorder dietitian Emma Townsin is here to flip the script on restrictive diets, emotional eating, and why your body isn’t sabotaging you—it’s actually trying to keep you alive.From childhood, we absorb sneaky messages linking thinness to morality—through cartoons, movies, casual co...
2025-03-24
36 min
The Write Project
NICOLE LITTLE and 15 other authors reveal their WRITING ENERGY LEVEL! | The Write Project
Are you the type of writer that starts when the sun rises, and leaves the keyboard jazzed up to start the day? Or is writing the last thing you do before bed, at the end of a long one? Does writing energize you, or does it exhaust you?Featuring, from Engen Books Ltd.:Nicole Little, author of Roxy Buckles and the Flight of the SparrowElizabeth Whitten, author of Off-Panel: A History of NL ComixErin Vance, author of ExposureLisa Timpf, contributor to A Toast to HopeHannah Jenkins...
2025-03-17
29 min
Not Your Therapist
#13 Desire Disasters: What Kills Your Sex Drive & How to Get It Back with Shie Benisti LCSW
Send us a textStruggling with low libido? Feeling disconnected from your partner? You're not alone. In this episode of Not Your Therapist Podcast, licensed sex therapist Shie Benisti, LCSW, CST, joins us to break down the real reasons why sexual desire fluctuates—and what you can do to bring intimacy back.We dive into the mental, emotional, and relational blocks that impact desire, including the role of stress, hormonal changes, and the mental load that disproportionately affects women. Shie also shares practical, no-BS strategies to...
2025-03-17
39 min
Not Your Therapist
#12 Therapists Spill the Tea: What We Wish Clients Knew with Darrian Pelkey MSW, LCSWA
Send us a textEver wonder what your therapist really thinks about you? 🤔 In this episode of Not Your Therapist Podcast, licensed therapist Darrian Pelkey, MSW, LCSWA, joins me to spill the tea on what goes on behind the scenes in therapy.We’re pulling back the curtain on the things therapists wish clients knew—from common misconceptions about therapy to what we actually think when you apologize for crying in session. If you’ve ever worried about being a “bad” client, overthought what you said after a session, or wondered if your thera...
2025-03-17
35 min
Not Your Therapist
Shrink Shots: Therapy Terms 101 – Emotional Regulation – How to Stop Flipping Out (Even When They Deserve It)
Send us a textEver feel like your emotions hijack your brain before you even have a chance to think? Emotional regulation is the key to handling stress, frustration, and overwhelm without exploding (or shutting down). In this quick Shrink Shots episode, we’re breaking down what emotional regulation actually means, why it’s so hard sometimes, and how to stop flipping out—even when someone totally deserves it.💡 What You’ll Learn:✔️ What emotional regulation is (and what it isn’t)✔️ Why your brain struggles to stay calm under stress✔️ S...
2025-03-13
07 min
Not Your Therapist
Shrink Shots: Therapy Terms 101 – Emotions – What the Hell Are They & Why Do We Have Them?
Send us a textEver wondered why you have emotions—or why they sometimes feel like they’re running your entire life? In this quick Shrink Shots episode, we’re breaking down the science behind emotions, what they’re actually trying to tell you, and how to deal with them without letting them take over. Spoiler alert: Your emotions aren’t the enemy—they’re data. You just need to know how to read them.💡 What You’ll Learn:✔️ What emotions really are and why they exist✔️ Why some emotions feel way too intense✔️ How...
2025-03-11
08 min
Not Your Therapist
#11 Rethinking Health: How to Ditch All-or-Nothing Thinking and Make Wellness Work for You with Liz Rodriguez
Send us a textEver feel like you’re either all in on health—meal prepping, intense workouts, cutting out everything fun—or completely off the wagon? That all-or-nothing mindset is exhausting, unsustainable, and (spoiler alert) not the key to long-term health.In this episode, I sit down with health coach Liz Rodriguez to reframe what real wellness looks like. We’re ditching the toxic perfectionism around food and fitness and learning how to create a healthy lifestyle that actually fits into your life.💡 What You’ll Learn:✔️ How...
2025-03-10
39 min
Not Your Therapist
Shrink Shots: Therapy Terms 101 – Reparenting – Giving Yourself the Childhood You Wish You Had
Send us a textDid your childhood leave you with some emotional gaps? Enter reparenting—the process of giving yourself the love, support, and validation you may not have received growing up. In this quick Shrink Shots episode, we break down what reparenting is, why it matters, and how you can start healing old wounds by becoming the nurturing, compassionate parent you needed. Learn practical strategies to soothe your inner child, set healthier boundaries, and rewrite the messages that still impact your self-worth today.💡 Topics Covered:✔️ What is reparenting, and why does...
2025-03-06
10 min
Spirit Mornings
03-04-25 Spirit Mornings Show
Guest Time Stamps: -Morning Prayer (Fr. Mark McKercher): 9:23 -Katie Patrick (Executive Director, Catholic Social Services of Southern Nebraska) - Celebration of Hope Gala: 12:43 -Fr. Jeff Loseke (Pastor, St. Charles Borromeo, Gretna) - Ask-A-Priest: 43:53 -GBC: Job 4 - Dcn. Jay Reilly (St. Vincent de Paul, Omaha): 1:15:24 -Kayla Brion (Director of the Newman House at Chadron State) - What's New at the Newman: Newman House in Chadron State: 1:44:24
2025-03-04
1h 58
Not Your Therapist
SHRINK SHOTS: Therapy Terms 101 – Dissociation – When ‘Zoning Out’ Is Actually a Trauma Response
Send us a textDissociation: When ‘Zoning Out’ Is Actually a Trauma ResponseEver found yourself zoning out mid-conversation or realizing you don’t remember the last five minutes of your drive? You’re not alone. This might be dissociation, a psychological defense mechanism that helps protect the brain from stress and trauma.In this episode of Shrink Shots, we break down:✅ What dissociation is and why it happens.✅ The neuroscience behind dissociation—how the brain responds to trauma.✅ Signs yo...
2025-03-04
07 min
Not Your Therapist
#10 The Gut-Brain Connection: How Your Diet Impacts Anxiety and Depression
Send us a textDid you know your gut is your “second brain”? The connection between your gut and brain, known as the gut-brain axis, plays a huge role in your mental health. In this episode of Not Your Therapist, we explore how what you eat can impact anxiety, depression, and your overall mood.Learn why your gut health matters, the signs of gut imbalance, and the foods that can either harm or heal your microbiome. We’ll also share simple, practical steps to improve your gut health, like incorporating probiotic-rich foods...
2025-03-03
20 min
Not Your Therapist
SHRINK SHOTS: Therapy Terms 101 – Cognitive Distortions – Your Brain Is Lying to You (And You Don’t Even Know It)
Send us a textYour brain is constantly filtering reality, but what if those filters are twisting the truth? Cognitive distortions are sneaky thought patterns that make you believe things that aren’t actually true—and they’re a major reason behind anxiety, relationship problems, and low self-esteem.In this episode of Shrink Shots, we’re breaking down:✅ What cognitive distortions are and how they hijack your thinking✅ Real-life examples of distorted thinking in celebrities, politicians, and pop culture✅ The top cognitive distortions that fuel anxiety, self-doubt, and overthinking✅ How to catch and cha...
2025-02-27
07 min