Shows
Hurt Meets Healer PodcastI Want A Partner, Not A ProjectYour marriage can survive a lot, but betrayal has a unique way of turning love into labor. When infidelity hits, trust is not the only thing that breaks. Safety breaks. Reality breaks. And for many betrayed spouses, the relationship quietly becomes a full-time project: checking phones, tracking moods, chasing transparency, and doing the emotional work of recovery for two people.Kim and John get painfully honest about the difference between a partner and a project. We talk through why “fixing” is such a strong pull after sexual betrayal trauma, and why it still fails to create real chan...
2026-06-2250 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastSafety First, part 2Safety doesn’t come back because time passes, it comes back when your body gets real evidence that danger is over. We sit down for a raw, practical talk about betrayal trauma and why infidelity and sexual betrayal can leave the betrayed spouse stuck in hypervigilance, intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and a nervous system that refuses to settle even when the unfaithful partner says “I’m trying.”We dig into what actually helps restore the conditions for safety: genuine care, compassion, understanding, and empathy. Not performative apologies, not pressure to “forgive and forget,” and definitely not defensiveness. We also unpack...
2026-06-0847 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastSafety First, part 1Safety isn’t a buzzword for me right now, it’s the line between surviving and actually healing. I’m recording solo as John steps back, and I’m talking plainly about what it feels like to live in the aftermath of infidelity, porn addiction, and long-term secret sexual behaviors. When the person you trusted most becomes a threat, your nervous system does exactly what it was designed to do: it sounds the alarm. If you’ve been told to “just let it go,” I explain why that doesn’t work and what trauma-informed recovery looks like instead.I walk throu...
2026-05-2551 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastBreak The CycleThe fastest way to stay stuck after infidelity is to keep having the same fight with new words. We name the brutal loop that so many couples live in after sexual betrayal: poor communication, misunderstandings, mistrust, and then another round of pain that feels impossible to calm down.We walk through a six-step recovery roadmap drawn from Gottman research, emotionally focused therapy, and betrayal recovery frameworks: commit to the process, create immediate safety, process the betrayal, rebuild communication skills, attune emotionally to rebuild trust, and reconnect into a new kind of relationship. Along the way, we share...
2026-05-111h 10Hurt Meets Healer PodcastWhat The What? A Hard Talk About Trust“If you couldn’t talk, would I fall in love with your actions?” That one question exposes what trust is made of and that which betrayal destroys. We sit down for a raw, unfiltered conversation about what happens when words sound spiritual and sincere, but behavior still hides, deflects, or withdraws. If you’re walking through sexual addiction, infidelity, deception, or the aftershocks of a double life, you’ll recognize the push-pull of wanting answers while also needing safety more than explanations.We dig into what actually fuels hiddenness and why it starts so early for so many peopl...
2026-04-271h 02
Sew Powerful ParablesThe Story of RhodaThis tale is the story of Peter, as seen through the eyes of a young slave girl.
Written and Narrated by Dana Buck
Additional voices provided by: Kelsey Jones, Dametri Wallace, Jody Collins, Bill Collins, Johnny Rocha, Jordan Miles, Steven Pratt, Brandon Blue, Jacob Frohreich, Dane Cheatly, Toby Capps, Jaiden Smith
Devotional Thoughts Narrated by Kim Pratt
Produced by Beneath Blue Skies Productions
Music Credit: Adobe Music - "Persian Documentary", "Modern Arabic Corporate", "Ghaffar", "Persian Food Documentary", "Arabic Trailer Intro", "Relaxed Meditation", "Desert Sunset", "Arabic Trailer", "Arabic Night", "Ramadan 2020", "Djadi", "Morrocco Documentary", "The Ramadan"
2026-04-2237 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastWalking With An Emotional LimpBetrayal trauma doesn’t fade because someone says “sorry” or quotes forgiveness. When trust gets shattered by infidelity and sexual betrayal, the fallout can look like grief, anxiety, insomnia, PTSD symptoms, shame, and a faith crisis that makes you question everything you thought was true. We call it walking with an emotional limp because you may function on the outside while every step still hurts on the inside.We get honest about what actually blocks healing and what helps it begin. We use a broken toe story to make the point plain: wounds heal when they’re cared fo...
2026-04-1346 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastWhy I StayedThe question “Why did you stay?” can feel like an accusation until you’ve lived inside betrayal trauma. We sit down as a married couple and tell the truth about what kept us here after infidelity, lies, and the long fallout of sexual addiction and broken trust. It isn’t one simple reason, and it isn’t a clean timeline. It’s hope, fear, faith, kids, history, and the complicated math of safety.Kim walks through the faulty beliefs that can quietly lock partners into unhealthy dynamics: thinking divorce automatically makes you a failure, believing you caused the betrayal...
2026-03-3053 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastIs There Peace in Not Knowing? - Finding Real Peace After BetrayalPeace that depends on silence isn’t peace at all—it’s quicksand. We tackle the hard question: is there peace in not knowing after sexual betrayal? Kim and John open up about the shaky calm that comes from avoidance, the simmer beneath a detente, and the moment truth—however painful—becomes the only solid ground. We don’t romanticize disclosure; we show how it spikes distress, then unlocks consent, clarity, and a path to rebuild safety.We break down the difference between honesty and transparency. Honesty answers the question fully; transparency goes first, proactively naming slips, triggers, an...
2026-03-1652 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastThe Bucket Of SuckA phrase as plain as “bucket of suck” can hold an entire season of life—when betrayal trauma hits, the weight of grief, rage, and confusion follows you everywhere. We open up about what it feels like to carry that load, how it spills into every corner of your day, and what it takes to stop it from pulling you under. From the first shock of disclosure to the slow return of strength, we map the path forward with equal parts honesty and hope.We break down why betrayal isn’t just an emotional storm; it’s a nervous...
2026-03-0246 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastLet's Talk About Regrets****Life Unscripted: Our stories, unfiltered. We are walking through life, sharing our stories. If at any point you become triggered by this conversation, please care for yourself.Regret can feel like quicksand after sexual betrayal—pulling you under with shame, second-guessing, and the lie that nothing can change. We open up about the regrets that mattered most, from trusting unsafe people and waiting too long to get help to believing church clichés that sidelined boundaries and protected abuse. Then we pivot to the hard, hopeful work of turning regret into action: setting evidence-based expectations for...
2026-02-1652 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastI'm Your Spouse & Partner, Please Include Me****Life Unscripted: Our stories, unfiltered. We are walking through life, sharing our stories. If at any point you become triggered by this conversation, please care for yourself.You can end the sexual acting out and still be living a double life. We open up about the painful space where porn stops but secrecy survives, and how that “respectable betrayal” quietly starves a relationship of safety, partnership, and desire. From hidden financial moves and unilateral decisions to trickle truth and using recovery as a shield, we trace how old dopamine loops find new disguises when accountability is m...
2026-02-0250 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastDo Liars Know They’re Lying? Recovery, Self-Deception, And TrustWhat if the most dangerous lie is the one you tell yourself first? We dig into the hard question—do liars know when they’re lying—and follow it through the real-world fallout: broken trust, numbed empathy, and a slow drift from love into image management. From conscious deceit to self-deception and memory distortions, we unpack how small compromises become a lifestyle, and how that lifestyle quietly erodes marriages, faith, and self-respect.John opens up about the progression from self-protection to self-deception during addiction, and the painful realization that came only when he could finally see the damage...
2026-01-1944 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastI’m Taking Off The Kid GlovesIf you’ve ever felt forced to be “the understanding one” while your heart keeps bleeding, this conversation will feel like oxygen. Kim and John dive straight into the cost of kid gloves after betrayal—how minimizing, DARVO, and conflict avoidance prolong pain—and what it actually takes to restore safety. We draw a sharp line between confidence and self awareness, unpack how trauma bonds keep partners stuck, and name the moment the betrayed spouse chooses reality over appeasement.You’ll hear a clear framework for boundaries and consequences that isn’t about punishment—it’s about safety. We break d...
2026-01-0557 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastWhy Is Change So Darn Hard? - part 2I Stopped Acting Out… So Why Do I Still Act Like a Jerk? (The Arrogance Trap in Recovery)Sobriety stops the behavior, but does it actually make your partner feel safe? We go straight at the hard stuff: why pride can feel like progress, how “ego doping” keeps the reward system hooked, and what real humility looks like when the acting out ends but healing hasn’t begun. Kim and John unpack the difference between dry sobriety and meaningful recovery, naming the subtle dynamics that quietly wreck trust—minimizing, spiritual bypassing, scorekeeping, and defending intentions instead of owning imp...
2025-12-2256 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastWhy Is Change So Darn Hard? - part 1Change isn’t hard because you’re weak; it’s hard because it rewires how you survive. We open up about the messy middle of recovery after sexual betrayal and infidelity, where deep ruts—neural and emotional—fight to keep things the same. Together we unpack why willpower alone fails, how dopamine trains the brain to cling to secrecy and validation, and why early sobriety can feel painfully flat compared to the highs of acting out. Naming the biology clears shame and gives us a plan.We also draw a firm, necessary line around encouragement. Contrast changes people mor...
2025-12-0857 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastFBS - Faulty Belief Systems**Disclaimer: We discuss real issues about our relationship. This, at times, is raw, emotional, and extremely hard. Use caution and employ grounding techniques if you become triggered by this discussion.What if the story you tell yourself about pain is the very thing keeping you in it? We go straight at faulty belief systems—those sticky, inherited, and often spiritualized narratives that shape how we interpret betrayal, minimize abuse, and call silence “peace.” From the “elephant in the parlor” of family secrets to church myths about divorce, we unpack how bias, fear, and shame create a reality distortion...
2025-11-2452 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastWhen You Choose You, You Lose Me - part 2“When you choose you, you lose me” is a hard sentence to hear—and a necessary one to explore. We unpack how selfish patterns, secrecy, and transactional bargains corrode love after betrayal, and why safety-focused boundaries are not punishment but the first scaffolding of repair. From raw personal stories to faith-grounded principles, we trace the slow work of rebuilding trust day by day, drop by drop.We dig into the difference between self-care and self-centeredness, especially in the wake of sexual addiction or infidelity. The betrayed partner needs protective space; the betraying partner often misreads that space as rej...
2025-11-1046 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastWhen You Choose You, You Lose Me, part 1A single sentence—“When you choose you, you lose me”—can crack open the truth about why relationships crumble after betrayal. We take you inside that reality with a candid look at selfishness versus self-care, what safety actually feels like in the body, and how boundaries function as bridges instead of walls. From the first minute, we name the hard parts: gaslighting that reframes feelings as attacks, entitlement that calls harm “fairness,” and the slow burn of repeated deception that turns homes into places where nervous systems never rest.You’ll hear why accountability starts where defensiveness ends, and how...
2025-10-2736 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastWhen The Shift Hits The FanKim and John wrap up Season 1 by reflecting on their personal and relational growth through recovery from sexual addiction and infidelity. They explore how significant life changes—like Kim's 50-pound weight loss journey—mirror the emotional healing process that requires patience, consistency, and professional help.• Kim shares her longing for "safety, peace, stability, and consistency" after years in survival mode• John discusses learning to lead with love and stability despite his own woundedness and past failures• The metaphor of John's broken foot illustrates how physical and emotional healing both take longer than expected• Discussion of trauma an...
2025-09-2949 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastPart 3: Forgiveness...Is More Than Saying SorryForgiveness after betrayal isn't simply about saying "sorry"—it demands fundamental change that many struggling couples never achieve. This raw, unfiltered conversation pulls back the curtain on what true reconciliation requires after sexual betrayal tears a relationship apart.Kim introduces a powerful concept that cuts through empty apologies: "Sorry stops." Genuine repentance means the harmful behavior completely ends, not just gets temporarily paused or hidden better. For betrayed spouses, recognizing true remorse means watching for subtle signs—facial expressions, attitudes, and the absence of blame—that reveal whether their partner has truly changed or is merely performing remors...
2025-09-1545 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastPart 2: Forgiveness...Is More Than Saying SorryNavigating the treacherous waters of forgiveness after intimate betrayal requires more than just hearing "I'm sorry." In this second installment of our forgiveness series, we dive deep into what true forgiveness looks like when trust has been shattered.Using a powerful analogy of John's recent foot injury, we explore how emotional wounds, like physical ones, cannot heal properly when ignored or covered up. Just as his injured toe required examination, cleaning, and proper treatment, the pain of betrayal demands acknowledgment and care—not a quick bandage of forced forgiveness."Forgive and forget" might be the mo...
2025-09-0146 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastForgiveness...Is More Than Saying SorryWhat does genuine forgiveness actually look like when you've been deeply wounded? In this raw, unfiltered conversation, we tackle the misconception that forgiveness simply means saying "I'm sorry" and moving on. Instead, we explore the painful, messy reality of what true forgiveness demands.The journey begins with debunking common myths - most notably that "forgive and forget" appears nowhere in scripture. Biblical forgiveness involves cancelling a debt, not developing amnesia about what happened. This process costs us something significant: our right to justice or revenge. We discuss how forgiveness becomes especially challenging when offenses are repeated or...
2025-08-1841 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastHealthy Detachment: Finding Space to Heal After BetrayalThe fog of betrayal can be suffocating. After discovering sexual infidelity, many partners find themselves gasping for air, desperately trying to make sense of their new reality while constantly being pulled back into chaos by ongoing deception. This powerful episode explores the lifeline of healthy detachment - a misunderstood concept that proves essential for survival and healing.Kim shares her personal journey of needing to create space from John's persistent lies and manipulation, not as punishment but as self-preservation. "I needed safety. I needed to be able to sleep. I needed to not be lied to for...
2025-08-0439 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastThe State of Our UnionWhat does healing look like after decades of sexual addiction and betrayal? In this raw and vulnerable episode, we pull back the curtain on our own marriage journey, sharing our "State of the Union" after 36+ years together.The transformation we've experienced in just the past few months feels almost miraculous. We recently took two international trips that would have previously been minefields of triggers and conflict. Instead, we discovered a level of emotional intimacy we'd never known before—proving that real change is possible even after years of devastating hurt.John opens up about his br...
2025-07-2146 minHurt Meets Healer PodcastShould I Stay or Should I Go? Part 2Sexual betrayal shatters the sacred covenant of marriage, creating complex decisions about whether to stay or leave after such devastating violations of trust and commitment. We examine seven critical indicators that signal when leaving might be necessary while offering practical guidance for those navigating this painful journey.• Ongoing or unrepentant infidelity makes relationships unsustainable, especially when the unfaithful spouse refuses to take responsibility• Sexual betrayal often comes with emotional abuse such as gaslighting, manipulation, or shaming that creates unsafe environments• Trust is marriage's bedrock, and when irreparably damaged, relationships may no longer be viable despite attemp...
2025-07-0747 min