Shows
The Therapy Gents092: Healing Changes Your Relationships (And Not Always For The Better...)Send a textIn today's episode Michael & Andy discuss how healing changes relationship dynamics. While this often times does lead to more healthy connection in our lives, it can also disrupt longstanding relationship dynamics as well. We hope you enjoy the episode!
2026-02-1144 minThe Therapy Gents091: When the "YOLO" Mentality Becomes Self DestructiveSend us a textIn Today's episode Michael & Andy discuss YOLO! (You Only Live Once) mentalities and how at times they can become self destructive.
2026-01-1436 minThe Therapy Gents090: Boundaries around the HolidaysSend us a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss how to navigate setting boundaries with family and friends around the holidays! The holidays are meant to be a time of good cheer, not overwhelming resentment and stress. Naturally we'll have a little bit of both, but we hope this episode helps you reduce some of the latter. Enjoy!
2025-12-1636 minThe Therapy Gents089: Questions about TraumaSend us a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss trauma, how to heal from it, and what the process of healing tends to look like. They also discuss the difference between single event and complex PTSD.
2025-12-0337 minThe Therapy Gents088: Q&A: Random Anxiety, Doom Scrolling and MoreSend us a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss several questions that we commonly get as therapists. Enjoy!
2025-11-0535 minThe Therapy GentsTo Parents of Neurodivergent Children (Autism, ADHD, etc)Send a textToday's episode Michael and Andy discuss parenting neurodivergent children. What is neurodivergence? What are some misconceptions? What are some tips and tricks for boundary setting? How can you increase emotional expression and understanding? Communication? These questions and more are addressed!
2025-10-2148 minThe Therapy Gents086: Social Media Division & Outrage (Charlie Kirk Assassination Case Study)Send us a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss how damaging social media can be to our mental health and especially to our relationships when we allow outrage and division to permeate. They explore the recent assassination of Charlie Kirk and the aftermath as an example of how such division can influence our day to day lives and key relationships.
2025-09-2345 minThe Therapy Gents085: When Trust is HardSend us a textIn Today's episode Michael and Andy discuss how trust in relationships can be difficult... especially when it is broken.
2025-09-0941 minThe Therapy Gents084: K-Pop Demon Hunters From Two Therapist's POVSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy analyze all of the mental health parallels they noticed while watching K-Pop Demon Hunters!
2025-08-2638 minThe Therapy Gents083: Anger is NOT a bad emotion!Send us a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss anger as an emotion in all of its manifestations. Sometimes anger can be explosive and unhealthy, but it can also be very healthy to experience and express.
2025-08-1337 minThe Therapy Gents082: Fight Right by John & Julie Gottman: How Conflict can Bring You Closer to Your PartnerSend us a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss the Gottman's new book "Fight Right." Conflict is often viewed as a negative aspect of relationships but we're here to back up the Gottman's research: conflict need not be negative and destructive. Learning to 'Fight Right' is what makes... or breaks... most relationships.
2025-07-1536 minThe Therapy Gents081: Resentment in RelationshipSend us a textIn today's episode Michale and Andy discuss resentment and how it affects relationships. They explore what makes it so corrosive in relationships and how to address it.
2025-07-0339 minThe Therapy Gents080: Mental Health DiagnosisSend us a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss the value of mental health diagnosis and what to watch out for in the day of social media and mental health TikTok.
2025-06-1740 minThe Therapy Gents079: Guidance for a Strong MarriageSend us a textIn this episode Michael Medley offers some guidance and keys to help improve your marriage and relationships. There are some clear patterns that show up in intimate relationships, being able to recognize these patterns in yourself and your marriage can lead to the change and hope you've been looking for. Michael outlines some differences between mature and immature behaviors that show up in relationships and have the potential to amplify them, or destroy them. Then we will explore 5 ways to build trust, and 5 rules to keep an argument on the healthy s...
2025-06-0438 minThe Therapy Gents078: Book Review - The 7 LOVE Agreements by Douglas WeissSend a textIn this episode Michael Medley, LPC give a brief book review of The 7 LOVE Agreements by Douglas Weiss. These agreements will help to improve your relationship and increase intimacy. The 7 LOVE Agreements include: 1. Faithfulness, 2. Patience, 3. Forgiveness, 4. Service, 5. Respect, 6. Kindness, and 7. Celebration. This episode gives a few examples for each agreement to help you better understand how you might be able to apply them to your marriage or relationship. We hope you enjoy this episode and please share it with those you love. If you have any questions please send us a...
2025-05-2141 minThe Therapy Gents077: How to Find the Right Therapist for YOUSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy break down several ways you can vet therapists to find the best fit for you! They cover the value of the free 15 minute consult most therapists offer, what questions to ask a potential therapist, red flags to look out for and the value of recognizing when a therapist is no longer the best fit for you.
2025-05-0836 minThe Therapy Gents076: When Self Care Becomes AvoidanceSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss how valuable self care routines can be- but how they can also turn into something more like avoidance.
2025-04-2239 min
Healing and Growing, Hand in Hand129. From Faith Deconstruction to Reconstruction & Healing with Andy Newman, LPCJOIN THE HEALING WORKSHOP HERE: https://healingworkshop.carrd.co/Have you ever felt like your church community no longer aligns with your values… but leaving feels terrifying? You’re not alone. In this powerful episode, we sit down with Licensed Associate Counselor Andy Newman to go into the deeply personal (and often confusing) process of faith deconstruction and religious trauma recovery.Andy shares what religious trauma really is, how therapy supports people through deconstruction, and why your gut instinct may be the key to healing.
2025-04-1441 minThe Therapy Gents075: Guilt vs ShameSend a textIn today's show Michael and Andy unpack the difference between guilt and shame and more importantly- how to address your shame when you do experience it.
2025-04-0835 minThe Therapy Gents074: Emotional RegulationSend a textIn today's episode Michael & Andy break down emotional regulation and how to improve it in 5 steps!
2025-03-2548 minThe Therapy Gents073: EMDR TherapySend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy break down EMDR therapy- what it is, why it's so effective, and some common misconceptions about it. Enjoy!
2025-03-1145 minThe Therapy Gents072: Developing AssertivenessSend a textWhat is assertiveness and how do I develop it in a healthy manner?Assertiveness is the ability to say what you need, want, feel, or think in a positive, direct manner without being too aggressive or passive. Assertiveness allows healthy boundaries to be expressed and held. It also allows you to take others' feelings, thoughts, and position into account while holding your own feelings, thoughts, and positions as equal. How can my body language increase or decrease my assertiveness? TedTalk by Amy C...
2025-02-2831 minThe Therapy Gents071: CodependencySend a textTechnical/Psychological Definition:Codependency is a dysfunctional relationship pattern in which individuals develop an excessive emotional or psychological reliance on another person, often to the detriment of their own well-being. It is commonly associated with relationships where one person enables another's addiction, poor mental health, or irresponsibility, and it often stems from early attachment issues, trauma, or dysfunctional family dynamics.Layman’s Definition:Codependency is when someone puts other people's needs ahead of their own so much that they lose themselves. They might feel responsible for fixing ot...
2025-02-1243 minThe Therapy Gents070: Different Types of SeparationSend a textEp. 070 Types of SeparationsWhat are some reasons people may think about separation? The “Deal Breakers” vs the Small Perpetual Problems. (Othen times the “deal breakers” we proclaim in the beginning are more solvable after years of marriage, and the smaller perpetual problems are the ones that tear us apart.) Deal Breaker: issues or behaviors that threaten the relationship: boundary violations, value changes, violations of trust, respect, safety, betrayal, and abuse - physical, sexual, emotional, or psychol...
2025-01-2843 minThe Therapy Gents069: New Years' ResolutionsSend a text“What’s one thing you’d like to accomplish this year?”Common Pitfalls with ResolutionsUse the SMART framework (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant,Time-bound).Staying Engaged with GoalsTrack Progress:○ Use apps, journals, or habit trackers to monitor your journey.○ Celebrate small wins to maintain momentum.Adjust as Needed:○ Goals aren’t set in stone; life changes, so should your plans.○ Regularly review and tweak your goals.Build a Support Network:○ Surround yourself with people who encourage and inspire you.○ Share your progress with the...
2025-01-1442 minThe Therapy Gents068: PhubbingSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss the phenomenon of "Phubbing" aka: snubbing somebody in your real life because your attention is on your phone. They break down research, ways to be self aware and not lose sight of valuable human connection at the expense of small dopamine hits from your phone!
2024-12-1839 minThe Therapy Gents067: Wisdom from QuotesSend a textEP. 067: Wisdom from QuotesDr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife - “We prefer the fantasy that we are owed happiness to the idea that we need to take responsibility for creating it.”Hippocrates - “Before you heal someone, ask him if he’s willing to give up the things that make him sick.”Lao Tzu - “Do not conquer the world with force, for force only causes resistance.” Epicurus - “Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remembe...
2024-11-1939 min2024-11-1331 minThe Therapy Gents066: Election Day 2024! Self Care Tips & How to Have Political Conversations with Friends/FamilySend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss their experience with elections through the years, their thoughts on the right to vote, how to have political conversations with friends and family, and important self care tips for election night when the stakes feel high.
2024-11-0545 minThe Therapy Gents065: Dr. Amen's BRIGHT MINDSSend a textBlood FloodRetirement and AgingGenetics Head TraumaToxinsMental HealthImmunity and InfectionsNeurohormone IssuesDiabesitySleep
2024-10-2244 minThe Therapy Gents064: Fight Right- A Gottman Book ReviewSend a textEp. 064 Fight Right - A Gottman Book ReviewPlato: “Be Kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”Epictetus: “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.”“It is not what you say, but how you say it.”Cicero: “In anger, nothing right or judicious can be done.”What do we really fight about? Most often NOTHING...
2024-10-0951 minThe Therapy Gents063: Rapid Fire Questions for A Couple TherapistsSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy address several questions. They discuss mental health in our current political climate, the effect of mental health influencers and technology, religious trauma vs faith deconstruction, and how to discuss difficult topics such as suicide with your children.
2024-09-2448 minThe Therapy Gents062: Healthy vs Toxic MasculinitySend a textWhere have all the good men gone? What makes a healthy masculine man? Healthy masculinity is based on balance, meekness, strength, humility, vulnerability, accountability, protection, chivalry, boundaries, and will create a space for the emotions of his female partner. The ability to listen with your ears and through your body.The Calm in the Storm - being able to regulate your nervous system while things are falling apart around you and co-regulate with others instead of escalating the situation.
2024-09-1143 minThe Therapy Gents061: Discipline and How to Improve ItSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy explore the concept of discipline. Where it's useful, how to improve it, and why it can sometimes be a topic that makes us recoil a bit!
2024-08-2937 minThe Therapy Gents060: Gaslighting: Did That Really Happen?Send a textToday we are going to talk about the dark and insidious world of gaslighting. From the early 1939 play titled ‘Gaslight’ to the present psychological damage caused by gaslighting. We will tackle it all….. Hopefully. Basic definition is a form of psychological manipulation in which one person seeks to make another person doubt their perceptions, memory, or reality. Sarah Morales defines it as “When a person (or group of people) through covert behaviors convinces another person that what t...
2024-08-1446 minThe Therapy Gents059: Back to School!Send a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy give some tips for dealing with back to school struggles that emerge- especially for parents!
2024-08-0841 min2024-07-1835 minThe Therapy Gents057: Lessons We've Learned as TherapistsSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss several lessons they've learned from being therapists. These lessons are not just about how they've grown as therapists, but how being a therapist has helped enrich their lives and more!
2024-07-0542 min2024-06-1935 minThe Therapy Gents055: Marriage and Attachment StylesSend a textEp. 055: Marriage and Attachment StylesCan you give me any specific advice on how to deal with stonewalling in my marriage? How can I (as an anxious attachment style) better handle some of my negative thoughts towards my spouse, (an avoidant attachment style)? I know it’s probably not about me, but when my spouse shuts down and isn’t willing to communicate and share feelings, I start to feel crazy inside. At times I feel treated as though I don’t exist?Demo...
2024-06-0734 minThe Therapy Gents054: Attachment Styles and ConflictSend a textBook: Attached by Amir Levine & Rachel Heller. Baruch Spinoza - “All happiness or unhappiness solely depends upon the quality of the object to which we are attached by love.”Byron Katie: “A thought is harmless unless we believe it. It’s not our thoughts, but our attachment to our thoughts, that causes suffering. Attaching to a thought means believing that it’s true, without inquiring. A belief is a thought that we’ve been attaching to, often for years.” (from her book Loving What Is)
2024-05-2142 minThe Therapy Gents053: Therapy Quick Hit QuestionsSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy address several quick hitting topics and questions. If you want your question to be included in a future podcast- please take advantage of the new text us feature above!
2024-05-1144 minThe Therapy Gents052: The Draw of SafetySend a textSeneca - “It’s not because things are difficult that we dare not venture. It is because we dare not venture that they are difficult.”“There is no growth in the comfort zone, and there is no comfort in the growth zone.” Safety ➡️➡️➡️ Challenge ➡️➡️➡️ Overwhelmed ⤵️ ⬆️⬅️⬅️⬅️⬅️⬅️⬅️⬅️What is anxiety? Defined by Dictionary.com - “1.distress or uneasiness of mind caused by fear of danger or misfortune. 2.earnest but tense desire. 3. A state of apprehension and psych...
2024-04-2644 minThe Therapy Gents051: Self CompassionSend a textEp. 051 Self-CompassionSelf-Compassion = Way of relating to the self kindly and accepting who we are and how we are. The 3 elements of Self-Compassion are: 1. Kindness; 2. Common Humanity; and 3. Mindfulness. In other words - It is a loving, connected presence with self. Self-Esteem = Global evaluation of self, increases the thought or belief that I have to be special, research has shown a strong correlation to the increase of narcissism since self-esteem movement started, perfectionism, inadequacy, and it is contingent on s...
2024-04-1946 minThe Therapy Gents050: Job Changes, Stress and how to Advocate for YourselfSend a textWhat keeps people stuck in a job they don't like?Is it the job or is it me? - Dealing with situational mental health Turning Self-sabotage into Self-promotion.The following is a short list of things that can keep us stuck or trapped in a position we do not want to be in: fear of rejection, self-doubt, perfectionism, perceived lack of opportunities, loyalty to company or boss, fear of the unknown, financial stability (or at least you know what you make), lack of confidence, external pressures, family, n...
2024-04-1438 minThe Therapy Gents049: Mental Health Q&ASend a textToday's episode features several questions from all of you! Michael and Andy both gathered questions on social media to do a mental health Q&A. If you would like to toss a question into the mix for our next Q&A episode, feel free to email them to actioncounseling@gmail.com
2024-04-0656 minThe Therapy Gents048: DatingSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy break down some dating advise! First date advise, red flags, goals to consider and more. Dating can be daunting and finding a balance between putting your best foot forward and being yourself can be difficult but we're here help!
2024-03-2943 minThe Therapy GentsEp. 047 The Past Does Not Define MeSend a textIn this episode Michael talks about how the traumatic things of our past does not need to determine our future. Michael makes some references to the book series "Fablehaven" and also a slogan from the book "1984" which read (and was paraphrased in the podcast) "Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past."Michael also explores how to address the different parts of ourself to heal from the past so that the past does not control the future.
2024-03-2031 minThe Therapy Gents046: Grief & HealingSend a textCS Lewis - “I not only live each endless day in grief, but live each day thinking about living each day in grief.”Elisabeth Kubler-Ross - “The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same, nor would you want to.”...
2024-03-1549 minThe Therapy Gents045: Healing from TraumaSend a textEp. 045 What Healing from Trauma Can Look LikeE.E. Cummings - “It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”Why is it hard to talk about trauma? Bessel vdK said that “traumatized people are not popular people because they remind us about how irrational society is and rational solutions can not take care of those traumatized.” There had been too much shame around trauma and the inhumanity that is often involved with trauma. He also said,“After traum...
2024-03-1342 minThe Therapy Gents044: Trauma (Part 2)Send a textMarcus Aurelius - “You have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”What are some common signs of trauma? Hypervigilance, hyper- or hypo-arousal, avoidance behaviors, flashbacks, memory problems (fragmented or suppressed), dissociation, dysregulated emotions, relationship problems, addictions, self-harm, low self-confidence, shame, ANTs, weight changes, social withdrawal or increased social activity, difficulty articulating thoughts or views, a myriad of physical symptoms, and more. Trauma is something that happens to you th...
2024-03-0143 minThe Therapy Gents043: Daily Tools for GrowthSend a textWhy use daily tools or do daily activities? Aristotle - “Educating the mind without educating the heart is no education at all.”Epictetus - “There are certain things you can control and certain things you can not control, and you must know the difference.”Serenity Prayer - “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”Do I trust myself to tre...
2024-02-2350 minThe Therapy Gents042: Me First, Not Me OnlySend a textSelflessness vs Selfishness What am I planting in my mind? Screens, news, friends, family, books, ect (Garden Metaphor)Do I know my parts and how they operate? Protectors and Exiles (Parts in daily life vs reactive parts vs wounded parts). Self - inherent healing capacity, soul, inner wisdom, spiritual, a state of being. If you feel like you hate everyone - eatIf you feel everyone hates you - sleepIf you feel like you ha...
2024-02-1637 minThe Therapy Gents041: The Courage to Be Disliked Part 2Send a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy break down the 2nd half of the Courage to Be Disliked. They focus primarily on an Adlerian concept of the "Separation of Tasks" and the value that comes from accepting the reality of other people disliking you. True freedom in interpersonal relationships comes from accepting this reality.
2024-02-0948 minThe Therapy Gents040: The Courage to Be Disliked: Part 1 (Book Review)Send a textToday Michael and Andy discuss the book "The Courage to be Disliked" by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga. This classic book of modern philosophy has been highly influential in the lives of many and today they break down why.
2024-02-0246 minThe Therapy Gents039: Mixed Faith MarriageSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy break down the complexities that arise with mixed faith marriages and share several tips!1. Differentiating between beliefs and values / focus on what has not changed 2. “Negotiating the Tenders” / compromise 3. Be patient and take it slow4. Give space for each other to mourn - talk about what that looks like from both sides 5. Remember the why of your marriage -what are you fighting for?6. Learn to genuinely respect each other for your belief / decision to leave7. Learn each others boundaries and limitat...
2024-01-2659 minThe Therapy Gents038: Metaphors for Mental HealthSend a textIn today's show Michael and Andy share their favorite metaphors they use with clients in therapy. Brace yourself- these metaphors may contain cheese.
2024-01-1944 minThe Therapy Gents037: Mental Health Speed Round!Send a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy tackle several topics & questions in mental health and give quick responses to each of them!
2024-01-1351 minThe Therapy GentsEp. 036 Resolutions and Meaning of ChangeSend a textVoltaire - “Better is the enemy of my best.”Friedrich Nietzsche - “He who has a WHY to live for can bear almost any HOW.” Common Types of resolutions: -The Holy Trinity of Mental Health - Exercise, Nutrition, and Sleep-To quit something-Financial Goals-Family Time-Travel-Learning or Personal Development-Organize and Declutter
2024-01-0543 minThe Therapy Gents035: Set Boundaries, Find PeaceSend a textSix Types of Boundaries: Physical, Sexual, Intellectual, Emotional, Material, and Time.Some Codependent Red Flags: Saying yes to everything (overextending yourself), neglecting yourself and your needs, avoidance, rescuing others from the problems they created for themselves, excuse making for others, if something happens to someone else you feel like it’s happening to you, taking care of people’s toxic behaviors, one-sided relationshipCounterdependency: Difficulty being vulnerable, can’t / won’t ask for help, fearful of being close to people, push people away, loneliness, do it all b...
2023-12-2247 minThe Therapy Gents034: Navigating Adult FriendshipsSend a textTitle: Adult Friendship NavigationBook: The Science of Stuck by Britt Frank, LSCSWChapter: 6 The Sticky World of Friendships and DatingQuestions about friendship:What constitutes an adult friendship?What roles do you want friends to play?What toxic friendship myths have crept into your belief system?“Friendships can be fraught with difficulty because the roles we want our friends to play conflict with who they actually are.” How to map o...
2023-12-1556 minThe Therapy Gents033: What is a Good Therapeutic RelationshipSend a textKey aspects of a good therapeutic relationship: Trust and Confidentiality, Empathy, Respect, Validation, Boundaries, Genuineness and Authenticity, Flexibility, Unconditional Positive Regard (Carl Rogers), Able to identify Transference and Countertransference, Congruency, Clarity and Understanding, ect.Key focuses of therapy: Goal or Solution Focused, Encouragement, Psycho-educational, Skill Building, Reduction of symptoms, Improved Communication, Improved Coping Skills, Building Self-Confidence, Identify and Reframe Negative Thought patterns, Trauma Recovery, Addiction Recovery, Anxiety Reduction, Alleviate Depression, and many more. Quotes.... because I like them so much.Carl Jung - “The meeting of t...
2023-12-0843 minThe Therapy Gents032: Hubris and Facing the Sirens' Songs of LifeSend a textHomer’s epic ‘The Odyssey’ is full of amazing metaphors and symbolism for life today. Odysseus and the Sirens: Gains knowledge from the sorceress Circe.Protects his men from temptations. Desire for more knowledge, tied to mast, underscores the need for self-discipline.The need for restraint.Gains knowledge of his own weaknesses and vulnerabilities.Types of Sirens in our day:Social Media and the Internet (I just need...
2023-12-0146 minThe Therapy Gents031: Boundaries and the Holidays! How to deal with THAT relative.Send a textQuote: Seneca - “It is not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste much of it.”Why are the holidays so great, but cause so many problems?Who shows up to the holidays?The Oversharer (aka The Dirty Laundry Dance)The “I can do that” relativeThe CriticizerThe Ultimatum MakerThe “I’m so busy I can’t talk” (aka The Avoider)The “Why aren’t you married yet?” ol...
2023-11-1745 minThe Therapy Gents030: Self Discovery: Understand Who You AreSend a textQuotes: Socrates - “The unexamined life is not worth living.”Aristotle - “Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”Epictetus - “We cannot choose our external circumstances, but we can always choose how we respond to them.”Seneca - “He suffers more than necessary, who suffers before it is necessary.” What does self-discovery really mean?Why does it matter to understand yourself?...
2023-11-1056 minThe Therapy Gents029: Trigger Warning! This Episode is All About PORNSend a textCarl Jung - “What we resist, persists.”Drew Boa - “Sexual fantasy is an attempt to rewrite reality in our lives in a sexual way.”Background on porn on how treatment used to work vs now. Cycle of addictive behaviorQuestions: Did I, as a little kid, find porn, or did porn find me?In what ways do I use fantasy as a protection?Sexual Fantasy:
2023-11-031h 03The Therapy Gents028: Meditation: Why All of Us Can Benefit!Send a textDr. Amit Ray, “Mind is a flexible mirror, adjust it, to see a better world.” He also said “The true essence of meditation is not in the technique but in the quality of your presence. It’s about being fully present and aware in each moment.”Meditation as a daily practice brings a long list of positive benefits: Anxiety and Stress Reduction, Increase of Concentration or Focus, Improved Sleep, Increase of Vascular System, Lower Blood Pressure, Improve Immune System, Pain Reduction, Spiritual Growth, Increase Mind/Body Connec...
2023-10-2750 minThe Therapy Gents027: CBTools! Cognitive Behavioral Tools to Improve Your Life Today!Send a textQuote: Carl Jung - “Your vision will become clear only when you look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”Brief history - CBT can be traced back to the early Behaviorists like B.F. Skinner in the 1950's. They would track observable behaviors and use desensitization techniques, exposure therapies, and the like to work with anxieties and neuroses. Then came Aaron Beck’s work in the 1960’s on depression and how our thoughts played a pivotal role in emotional disorders. This moved forward to reali...
2023-10-2042 minThe Therapy Gents026: Our Favorite Anxiety Antidote: the Thought Record!Send a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy break down a common CBT intervention for anxiety known as 'Thought Records.' This process challenges our thoughts in healthy ways to better acquaint ourselves with not just what is making us anxious, but why that anxiety is so strong. We are often stuck in thought loops when such anxiety only focuses on supporting itself. Thought records train our minds to break through these loops to develop a more balanced understanding of ourselves and our anxiety.
2023-10-1637 minThe Therapy Gents025: Self Confidence/Self Love vs. Self EsteemSend a textWhat is really the difference between all the ways we label taking care of oneself? Self-confidence, self-compassion, self-esteem, self-care, self-help, ect. “The flower does not think of competing to the flower next to it. It just blooms.” from book Zen Shin TalksLet’s start from the beginning. How do parents play a role in the way their child views themself?Balance between love and responsibility. Where does my capacity fall into all of this...
2023-10-0646 minThe Therapy Gents024: Meditations Book ReviewSend a textMarcus Aurelius was the Roman Emperor from 161AD to 180AD. He was also a Stoic and a Philosopher. He was the last of the “Five Good Emperors” of Rome. He was adopted by Antoninus, who was the successor of Hadrian. Marcus Aurelius had no intention of publishing Meditations. The book was a journal to himself to explore the concepts of self discipline, justice, courage, and wisdom. He speaks of shortcomings, dealing with anger and emotions, and learning to become your potential. M...
2023-09-2950 minThe Therapy Gents023: The Heroes Journey, Star Wars & TherapySend a textIn today's episode Michael & Andy break down the Heroes Journey and how it can relate to our own therapeutic journeys through life!
2023-09-2252 minThe Therapy Gents022: Why Do People Lie? Effects of Lies & Why We Tell ThemSend a textToday's Podcast is brought to us by a set of topics asked about by Nananu. We appreciate your thoughts and the topics you asked us to explore.When we think of self-image, which do you think would affect it more? Lying or Avoiding Responsibility.What is the most common lie we all make?Virginia Woolf once said, "You can not find peace by avoiding life."Who lies? Who avoids responsibility?Common results when we lie: loss of trust, damaged relationships, pain, loss of authenticity, increase of fear, not able...
2023-09-1543 minThe Therapy Gents021: What Part of Me Did That?! Internal Family Systems Therapy Intro + No Bad Parts Book ReviewSend a textSophocles - "The keenest sorrow is to recognize ourselves as the sole cause of all our adversities."Epicticus - "Men are disturbed not by things, but the view which they take of them."Four Basic Goals of IFSLiberate parts from the roles they've been forced into, so they can be who they're designed to be.Restore trust in the Self and Self-leadership.Reharmonize the inner system.Become more Self-led in your interactions in the world.Five Things to Know About PartsParts are inna...
2023-09-0853 minThe Therapy Gents020: Fear is the MindkillerSend a textShow notes:Fear is the most powerful of emotionsFranklin D Roosevelt - "The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself."Yoda: "Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering."-potential to create self-discoveryCollective unconscious and Fear - pandemics, politics, spirituality vs secularism, morals and valuesHow does society respond to fear?How do you respond to fear in your relationship?How does your shame affect your fear response?How does...
2023-09-0145 minThe Therapy Gents019: 9 Different Types of LoveSend a textHow do you experience Love in your life?Love is a noun and a verb?Noun 1. A beloved person2. A great interest and pleasure in something (can be sexual desire)3. An intense feeling of deep affection.4. Unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of anotherVerb 1. To feel deep affection for someone 2. To like or enjoy something very much3. To hold dear4. To take pleasure in (“I love to play the piano”)5. T...
2023-08-2537 minThe Therapy Gents018: Healthy & Unhealthy Coping MechanismsSend a textMichael & Andy break down both healthy & unhealthy coping mechanisms: and how to see the difference!Common Unhealthy Coping mechanisms: avoidance/isolation, substance abuse, pornography, self-harm,dissociation, excessive screen time (over 1.5 hours of non-productive screen use), perfectionism, blaming/victim mentality, food, gambling, work, exercise (hours a day and you’re not a professional athlete), irritability/aggression, denial, and many othersStress Response | Stress Response Turned Inward | Self-CompassionFight | Self-criticism | Self-kindnessFlight | Isolation | Common humanityFreeze | Rumination | MindfulnessFawn | Self-criticism | All threeByron Kaytie’s CBT appr...
2023-08-1859 minThe Therapy Gents017: TraumaSend a textToday Michael & Andy discuss trauma. They break down acute, chronic and complex trauma, how to address and heal from trauma, and several therapeutic modalities that have evidence based benefits to addressing trauma.If you have any questions you want to ask The Therapy Gents please be sure to reach out to us at our email: actioncounseling@gmail.comAlso be sure to rate our podcast if you enjoyed todays episode!
2023-08-1558 minThe Therapy Gents016: The Value of Gratitude, Love & Honesty: Quotes and WisdomSend a textIn today's episode Michael & Andy discuss the value we can draw from popular culture and thought leaders by sharing several valuable quotes. Everything from Star Wars to Carl Jung contains wisdom and application to marriage, relationships, addiction, trauma and more.If you have any questions you want to ask The Therapy Gents please be sure to reach out to us at our email: actioncounseling@gmail.comAlso be sure to rate our podcast if you enjoyed todays episode!
2023-08-0450 minThe Therapy Gents015: Cognitive DistortionsSend a textIn today's episode Michael & Andy break down common cognitive distortions people face. There are many cognitive distortions that affect us. They affect our relationships, our perception of the world around us, and our self esteem. If you have any questions you want to ask The Therapy Gents please be sure to reach out to us at our email: actioncounseling@gmail.comAlso be sure to rate our podcast if you enjoyed todays episode!
2023-07-2145 minThe Therapy Gents014: The Seven DesiresSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy build on last week's discussion of the 7 deadly wounds with Mark & Debbie Laaser's 7 Desires. Those desires are to be Heard & Understood, Affirmed, Grateful (Blessed), Safe, Have Meaningful Touch, Be Chosen and Be Included. If you have any questions you want to ask The Therapy Gents please be sure to reach out to us at our email: actioncounseling@gmail.comAlso be sure to rate our podcast if you enjoyed todays episode!
2023-07-1454 minThe Therapy Gents013: The Seven Deadly WoundsSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy break down what Bob Schuchts describes as the 7 deadly wounds in his book "Be Healed."If you have any questions you want to ask The Therapy Gents please be sure to reach out to us at our email: actioncounseling@gmail.comAlso be sure to rate our podcast if you enjoyed todays episode!
2023-07-0835 minThe Therapy Gents012: Lobsters, Dopamine & Your HappinessSend a textIn Today's episode Michael and Andy discuss how we can learn from the psychology of Lobsters to better understand human mental health! They discuss reward systems in the brain and how chemicals like dopamine, serotonin and oxytocin help influence our stability. If you have any questions you want to ask The Therapy Gents please be sure to reach out to us at our email: actioncounseling@gmail.comAlso be sure to rate our podcast if you enjoyed todays episode!
2023-07-0140 minThe Therapy Gents011: Understanding Addiction and Breaking Down the StigmaSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss addiction, how it manifests, how to recognize it in yourself, and more! They also break down several areas of stigma that have been harmful. If you have any questions you want to ask The Therapy Gents please be sure to reach out to us at our email: actioncounseling@gmail.comAlso be sure to rate our podcast if you enjoyed todays episode!
2023-06-171h 00The Therapy Gents010: The Boy, The Mole, The Fox & The HorseSend a textIn today's episode Michael & Andy discuss the wonderful book "The Boy, The Mole, The Fox And The Horse" by Charlie Mackesy. This is a wonderful book that has tremendous nuggets of wisdom for all ages.
2023-06-0953 minThe Therapy Gents009: Shame in Society & Social Media + Developing Shame Resilience (Part 3)Send a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy break down how shame is built into society, social media and more. They discuss further how to develop shame resilience in a society that seems bent on shaming us for our normalcy, body type, identity and more.
2023-05-2650 minThe Therapy Gents008: Becoming Shame Resilient (Part 2)Send a textIn today's episode Michael & Andy break down what shame is, how it affects us and how we can become shame resilient.
2023-05-2629 minThe Therapy Gents007: Becoming Shame Resilient (Part 1)Send a textIn today's episode Michael & Andy break down what shame is, how it affects us and how we can become shame resilient.
2023-05-2032 minThe Therapy Gents006: Logotherapy in a Nutshell: Finding Meaning & Purpose in Life (Man's Search for Meaning Cont.)Send a textToday's episode is part 2 of Michael and Andy's discussion on Frankl's "Man's Search for Meaning." They cover logotherapy- which was Developed by the Austrian psychiatrist Viktor Frankl, and is a unique approach to psychotherapy that focuses on finding meaning and purpose in life, even in the midst of suffering.Unlike traditional psychotherapy, which often aims to alleviate symptoms or resolve conflicts, logotherapy seeks to help individuals confront the suffering they are facing and reorient their perspective towards the meaning of their life.
2023-05-1259 minThe Therapy Gents005: Finding Meaning Through Suffering: Book Discussion of Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor FranklSend a textIn this two part episode Michael & Andy begin their breakdown of one of the greatest books ever written: Man's Search for Meaning. Viktor Frankl writes the book as both a concentration camp survivor and psychiatrist who analyzes human suffering from the worst of human experiences. Frankl outlines how finding meaning in one's life is of the utmost importance.
2023-05-0558 minThe Therapy Gents004: ACTS- Exploring Emotional ConflictSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy expand on Gottman's 4 horsemen with a model for emotional conflict: ACTS. Acknowledge the Emotion, Clarify the Emotion, Tend to the Emotion & Support always.
2023-04-2835 minThe Therapy Gents003: Roadmap to Healthy Communication in Relationships | Gottman 4 Horseman pt. 1Send a textIn today's episode of the Therapy Gents we break down John & Julie Gottman's 4 horseman: Criticism, Defensiveness, Contempt and Stonewalling. These 4 horseman show up in most relationships, so how do you deal with them? Michael & Andy also discuss the antidotes to each horseman to breakdown healthy communication in relationships.
2023-04-2149 minThe Therapy Gents002: Validation Brings LightSend a textIn today's episode Michael and Andy discuss the power of validation in relationships. They break down how to validate even when you disagree with your loved one, validation in self, gratitude, recognizing when to validate vs. when to affirm your own positions, and the benefits of validation in general.
2023-04-1538 minThe Therapy Gents001: Boundaries! How to recognize a need for boundaries, when to set them, and how to hold them.Send a text
2023-04-0748 min