Shows
The Soul EnchiladaSE:117. Talking Adult ADHD - With Jess BassonThis Week’s Questions:Jess, when did you suspect you might have ADHD? Looking back, what were your childhood signs? How can ADHD be a superpower? What strategies have you learned that can help us all? SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, or ADHD, is a neurodevelopmental condition defined by persistent patterns of inattention, hyperactivity, and/or impulsivity starting in childhood. ADHD affects daily function in all aspects of l...
2025-12-0928 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 116: Overcoming Imposter Syndrome. Why You ARE Enough. With Jess BassonThis Week’s Listener Question:Why do you think imposter syndrome is so prevalent today? What are some practical strategies women can use when the voice in their heads is telling them they’re an imposter? SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. Imposter Syndrome is the feeling that your success is not deserved and that you’re secretly not as competent as others think you are, even when you are capable and have evid...
2025-11-2428 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 115: Why We Don't Talk PoliticsThis Week’s Listener Question:Why doesn’t the Soul Enchilada Podcast discuss politics or take a stance on today's key issues? SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. 1. What do you notice about your body/nervous system when you’re watching a heated, polarized debate? 2. Think of a political issue where people take one of two opposing sides. What would be a wise middle path between those opposing paths?
2025-09-2328 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE114: What We Find In The Dark - With Special Guest Aubrey SampsonThis Week’s Listener Question:Looking back before your best friend died, what do you wish you’d known and what surprised you about grief? SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group 1. Laura and Aubrey invited you into their intimate conversation and shared raw stories of grief and loss. What’s one story you can relate to? 2. When Aubrey’s best friend, Jenn, was dying, she visited her often and stayed...
2025-09-1131 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 113: Take a Risk, Reach Out and ReconnectThis Week’s Listener Question:How do you reconnect with someone special to you when it’s been a hot minute/month/or even years? SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. 1. Name 2-3 people you’ve lost touch with whom you would like to reconnect with. 2. What obstacles hold you back from reaching out to them today? 3. What do you think is contributing to the rise of loneliness...
2025-08-1230 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 112: Bridging the Gaps By Leading With Love, with special guest Dina BucholzThis Week’s Listener Question:This week, Laura talks with longtime friend, author, and Orthodox Jewish woman Dinah Bucholz about how to love our neighbors in a world where antisemitism is ever present for Dinah and her family. They share real stories, raw emotions, and highlight how we can lead with love, even when our neighbors have different faith practices or worldviews. SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. 1. What about Laura and Dinah...
2025-07-1534 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 111: What NOT to say, with special guest Mick JuarezSOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. 1. What did you hear from Laura and Mick’s conversation that surprised you about grief? 2. When have you walked through the D’s Laura brought up (death, divorce, devastation, disease, debt…)? How did that experience impact how you see the world today? 3. What are ways we can support people who are grieving? Why is it important to be careful with the words we choose and the language...
2025-06-2436 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 110: Let's Talk About a Tough TopicThis Week’s Listener Question:My child came home from college and says he now identifies as gay and has a boyfriend. I was raised in a church that believes homosexuality is a sin. What do you think I should do? SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. 1. What are your first thoughts and emotions after listening to this podcast? What comes up for you? 2. When you’re faced with a tou...
2025-06-1037 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 109: Speak Up, or Shut Up? Guidance For a Divided World.This Week’s Listener Question:It seems that we’re living in a time when family and friends disagree significantly on important issues. I find myself arguing with some people and ignoring others because I’d rather live in unity and everyone get along. Do you have any advice? SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. 1. How has judgment, categorizing, or labeling wounded you or someone you care about in the past? ...
2025-05-2731 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 108: Can't Decide? Here's Some Help if You're Stuck.This Week’s Listener Question:I just got a job offer to move to Portland, Oregon. I’ve always lived in the Midwest. If I go, I’ll leave family, friends, and everything familiar. But this is a great opportunity for my career, and it could really feed my adventurous soul. How do I decide? SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. 1. What intelligence center (head, heart, or gut) did you use to make decision...
2025-05-1329 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 107: Do You Make Hard Decisions With Your Head, Your Heart, or Your Gut?This Week’s Listener Question:I just got a job offer to move to Portland, Oregon. I’ve always lived in the Midwest. If I go, I’ll leave family, friends, and everything familiar. But this is a great opportunity for my career, and it could really feed my adventurous soul. How do I decide? SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. 1. What’s one decision you need to make in this season of your life?
2025-04-2926 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 106: Don't Judge Me, Don't Fix MeThis Week’s Listener Question:I appreciate your podcast because, to be honest, I’m afraid to share the real details of my life. When I do share with my Christian friends, I feel judged, and they usually try to fix me. How do I find a safe community of Christians like the Soul Enchilada? SOUL Group Questions:Ask each other these questions to build a stronger connection with a friend or in your Soul Group. 1. How would you describe a safe faith community? Have you found one?
2025-04-1530 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 105: Dealing With Adultery, Part 2This Week’s Listener Question:My sister found out that her husband had an affair and he is promising to stop and wants to save the marriage. Can people truly get over an affair? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. When has triangulation effected one of your relationships? 2. What boundaries or expectations do you have in your most intimate relationship? 3. Think of a time when you were able to r...
2025-04-0129 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 104: Affairs of the HeartThis Week’s Listener Question:My sister found out that her husband had an affair and he is promising to stop and wants to save the marriage. Can people truly get over an affair? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. How would you define someone having a physical affair? 2. What crosses the line for you and indicates someone is having an emotional affair? 3. Would you be more upset if...
2025-03-1829 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 103: How to FOCUS To Find Your PURPOSEThis Week’s Listener Question:I feel like I’m running around doing a lot of things, but I’m not doing anything really well or making a difference. I’m skimming the surface, but never going deep. How do I know what to focus on so I’m not so scattered and can feel like I’m living my life on purpose. SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. In what was do you struggle or iden...
2025-03-0429 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 102: How to Cope With a Crisis That Never Seems To EndThis Week’s Listener Question:My partner has Early Onset Alzheimer’s and every day feels like another challenge, crisis, or fire to put out. This is going to be a long journey. How do I not lose myself in it and find just a little bit of peace in the process? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. When have you faced a chronic problem, crisis, or challenge that went on for a long time or...
2025-02-1831 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 101: Scared Of the SilenceThis Week’s Listener Question:I’ve been invited to a silent retreat. I’d like to attend but honestly every time I try to meditate or sit in silent prayer, my mind races and I feel restless and distracted. What’s the point of sitting still? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. How would you describe your comfort level with solitude and silence? 2. What comes up for you when you practice si...
2025-02-0532 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 100: Surviving When it All Burns Down, with Claire AllenThis week we interview Claire Allen, a survivor of the 2021 Marshall Fires in Colorado in hopes of supporting friends now enduring massive fires in Los Angeles. This podcast is for anyone who is walking through trauma, loss, and grief or lovingly supporting someone who is. SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. When have you experienced a “fire storm” in your life? 2. In the early days of trauma or tragedy, how would you have describ...
2025-01-2345 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 99: How to Let Go of the Old and Embrace the NewThis Week’s Listener Question:I keep hearing that the new year is a perfect time to let go of the old in order to take hold of the new, but what does that really mean and how can I do it? Would you like to be with Laura and Christine as they record their 100th Soul Enchilada episode? If so, email Laura at laura@3oclockwakeup.com to reserve your seat. The recording will be done the week of January 20, 2025. We hope you’ll be a part of this fun event! S...
2025-01-0740 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 97: Mental Health Doesn't Take a HolidayThis Week’s Listener Question:Even though I tried to make the holidays peaceful and wonderful for my family, everything seemed to blow up in my face. How is it that you can do everything “right” as a parent and your kids are still going through major mental health issues? Would you like to be with Laura and Christine as they record their 100th Soul Enchilada episode? If so, email Laura at laura@3oclockwakeup.com to reserve your seat. The recording will be done the week of January 20, 2025. We hope you’ll be a part of...
2024-12-2630 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 97: Holiday PanicThis Week’s Listener Question:My college-aged kid came home from school super stressed out! How can I talk her off the ledge when she’s about to have an anxiety attack? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. How do your family members show their anxiety? 2. When you witness someone super anxious, what does it activate in you? 3. What helps you manage your personal anxiety? What’s in your “tool k...
2024-12-1032 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 96: Why Do I Keep Acting Like That?This Week’s Listener Question:What’s wrong with me? Every time I go home for the holidays, I revert back to my teenage self. I’ve matured so much since the but I act like a rebellious adolescent around my parents and siblings. SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. During the holiday, how do you regress or revert back to an older version of yourself? 2. How can you prepare yourself ahe...
2024-11-2629 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 95: A House Divided - Navigating Thanksgiving's Family ChallengesThis Week’s Listener Question:Thanksgiving is in two weeks. I really don’t want to host my extended family because we’re divided on several key topics. How do I navigate family division and still enjoy the holidays? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. When you think about Thanksgiving this year, what feelings and thoughts come up for you? 2. Think of a time when you had “gridlock” with a partner or family...
2024-11-1228 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 94: When You're Lost in the MiddleThis Week’s Listener Question:I’m in a really uncomfortable space. I used to be in breadwinner for our family. Now my husband and I switched places. He’s going to work and I’m staying home with the kids. I feel lost, without direction, in this new role. How do I motivate myself in this weird space? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. What uncomfortable transition or liminal space do you find yourself in...
2024-10-2930 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 91: God Said What?This Week’s Listener Question:I hear my friends talking about how the Holy Spirit or God is speaking to them so clearly. God doesn’t speak to me clearly. Why don’t I hear from God? And how can I? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. When you were growing up how were you taught to hear from God? 2. How are you listening and/or hearing differently now? 3. How wou...
2024-09-1733 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 89: Showing Up In the Sh!t$how.This Week’s Listener Question:Christine and Laura continue discussing attachment styles. To Laura’s surprise Christine showed up at the recording a “hot mess” having a complete meltdown. Step into their conversation and learn how you can move from chaos to calm and panic to peace. SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. When life overwhelms you, what’s usually your first response? 2. How comfortable are you when situations in life spin out of control? Do yo...
2024-08-2030 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 87: When You're Smothered By AnotherThis Week's Listener Question:My partner always wants me to go everywhere he goes. He won’t go to parties, games,church, or vacations without me. It feels like he’s smothering me and I need somespace. What should I do without hurting his feelings?Announcements:Summer Webinar Series – You are invited to join Laura Busse and Dr. Michaelle KnightAugust 8 – Press On with Perseverance and Make a PlanSign up here: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/event-details-registration/press-on-with-perseverance-and-design-a-plan
2024-07-2328 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 86: Can I Have Solid Relationships After a Shaky Childhood?This Week’s Listener Question:I’ve been learning about attachment styles and how we develop unhealthy attachment styles if we didn’t have secure attachment with our parents when we were growing up. I didn’t have one with my parents, so I’m wondering how to form a secure attachment with God and others. Is it possible?Announcements:Summer Webinar Series – You are invited to join Laura Busse and Dr. Michaelle Knight July 18 – Embrace Disappointment and Dream AgainAugust 8 – Press On with Perseverance and Make a Plan
2024-07-0934 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 84: Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes - TRANSITION and Face the ChangeThis Week’s Listener Question:Wow! I just got terrible news which will greatly impact my upcoming plans. I feel like I’m swimming in the soup of confusion, disappointment, and crisis. How do I figure out where to start when I can’t even think straight? Announcements:Are you in a season of TRANSITION? Do you want to find firm footing in times of change?Then sign up for Laura’s Summer Webinars with Dr. Michaelle Knight! HEREJune 13, July 18, August 8 – every month we guide you through new d...
2024-06-0438 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 83: Negative Thoughts In My HeadThis Week’s Listener Question:I’ve been a person of faith along time AND I still wrestle with negative talk in my head. How do I stop all the negative chatter? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. Draw a map of your mind and label different areas with thoughts that often repeat. Which ones do you think are negative (-) thoughts, which ones are positive (+) thoughts? You can label or color code them.
2024-05-2834 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 82: Lonely and Looking For LoveThis Week’s Listener Question:I’m really lonely. I wish I could find a life partner. I’ve always wanted to get married. It’s really hard on the weekends. I don’t trust dating apps. How do I learn to be content with being alone? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. When do you often feel lonely? How can you relate to this woman’s question? 2. Where do you find external c...
2024-05-2133 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 81: Heroine's Journey Part 9: At The Crossroads, Is It Worth The Risk?This Week’s Listener Question:I’m a single woman now. My husband died five years ago from cancer. I’ve always had a dream of doing mission work and recently found out I could be a nurse with Doctor’s Without Borders. I’ve never had the courage to change my life so dramatically. Do I follow my dream or stay in my comfort zone and continue to do what’s practical? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions.
2024-05-1430 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 80: Heroine's Journey Part 8: Courage to Promote MyselfThis Week’s Listener Question:At work, I’m the director of my department. I really like my job but I want a promotion, a new position of greater responsibility and authority. How can I find the courage to self-promote and apply for new positions? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. How do you get sabotaged by your inner critic? What does is often say? 2. Can you think of a time when...
2024-05-0633 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 79: Heroine's Journey Part 7: Healing the Mother-Daughter SplitThis Week’s Listener Question:How can I empower my adult children to turn to God and trust their relationship with Him without me (Mom) as constant intermediary? SOUL Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. What is the nature of your “mother wound”? Was your mother more likely to be intrusive, controlling, rejecting, neglectful or somewhere in between? 2. How have your mother’s limitations played out in your life? 3. ...
2024-04-3033 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 78: Heroine's Journey Part 6: Rediscover Your Wild SelfThis Week’s Listener Question:I became an empty nester two years ago and I’m having an identity crisis. I no longer know what my life is supposed to be about. How do I find myself in this new season? SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. Releasing – What from your old life do you need to release: clutter, relationships, roles, patterns of beliefs, fears…? 2.Reclaiming – What is your current relationship wit...
2024-04-2332 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 77: Heroine's Journey Part 5: Wandering Through DarknessThis Week's Listener Question:I went through a divorce a couple of years ago. I still feel like I’m wandering in the darkand can’t get over it. How do I get over this and move on?SOUL Group Questions:To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions.1. What grade in school would have skipped if you could?2. Christine and Laura shared several ideas for practicing rituals to help...
2024-04-1630 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 76: Heroine's Journey Part 4: Depression Through a Different LensThis Week’s Listener Question:I have been fighting depression for over a year now with little to no relief. I’ve tried different medications and nothing seems to work. What would you suggest I do now? SOUL Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. When have you gone through a dark night of the soul? What did you learn about yourself? 2. What life events or disruptions can catapult us or the ones...
2024-04-0930 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 75: Heroine's Journey Part 3: Am I on the Wrong Path?This Week’s Listener Question:Why is life so hard? I’ve going through a divorce, hate my job, and my best friend and I are fighting all the time. Does all this mean I’m on the wrong path? And if so, how do I get on the right one? SOUL Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. Where in your life are you playing it safe or clinging to old patterns? How might you s...
2024-04-0228 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 74: Heroine's Journey Part 2: Don't Like Change?This Week's Listener Question:I don't like change at all. I like routine and predictability. Is the Heroine's Journey just for adventurous people or for all of us? SOUL Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. What did it mean to be a “good girl” in your family of origin? 2. How have you tried to separate from a mother figure and win a father’s approval? 3. What skills are now...
2024-03-2630 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 73: Heroine's Journey Part 1: Pain as a Catalyst For ChangeThis Week's Listener Question:Christine and Laura, I feel stuck. My life feels like I’m just going through the motions – same thing, same ways, every single day. There has to be more! What do I do to get unstuck? SOUL Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. In what places of your life are you feeling stuck? 2. What fears or concerns are keeping you clinging to safety or the same routines?
2024-03-1933 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 72: How to Navigate Through GriefThis Week’s Listener Question:I lost my mother two years ago and had to be strong for my dad. Now we’re getting close to the anniversary of her death and I’m getting really anxious and angry at everyone who wants to talk about it. How do I deal with this? SOUL Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. Name some of the small and large losses you’ve suffered in the last several...
2024-03-1236 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 69: The Thrill Is GoneWhat do you do when you’ve been married for 25 years and there’s no passion left? Is it possible to get it back? SOUL Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your Soul Group, ask each other these questions. 1. Laura and Christine discussed the five different types of love languages and encourage you to discover yours and your partners. Five Love Languages· Words of Affirmation· Physical Touch· Quality Time· Acts of Service· Receiving Gifts
2024-02-2032 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 68: What Goes Around Comes Around: Caring for Elderly ParentsWhat goes around comes around, as the saying goes. Caring for elderly parents bring up so many emotions that’s impossible to list them all here. Couple these with the overlay of decades of family dynamics and you’ve got yourself a good old fashioned mine field. This week we talk about walking through that mine field in ways that preserve relationships… and sanity. This Week’s Listener Question:Laura and Christine,You've talked a lot about love, tough love, enabling vs. coming alongside in relationships. But I am in a new season...
2024-02-1331 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 58: Shopaholics Unite!How’s your relationship with shopping? Do you just get what you need, or do you feel like you always need to get more… even when you actually NEED nothing? How and why we shop is complicated and is layered with guilt around debt and need for self- fulfillment.This week, we talk shopping and how to maintain a balance when the pressure is ramped up during the Holidays. This Week’s Listener Question:This time of year, I feel pressured to shop… and shop and shop and shop. But… I’m in credit ca...
2023-12-0528 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 57: Betrayed!There are few things as painful as being betrayed by someone you trusted. It shakes our world and shatters our trust in others and our faith in ourselves. This week, we talk about how to deal with the pain of betrayal and steps of courage we can take to build back a level of trust that allows to maintain healthy, fulfilling relationships. This Week’s Listener Question:I’ve been betrayed by my husband. I’ve built everything in my life with him. Now my entire future feels shattered. How can I best cope wit...
2023-11-2828 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 56: When Life Feels Like a Country SongThis Week's Listener Question:My life feels like a really bad country song. I was diagnosed with cancer. My parents died in a car crash. And one of my kids is addicted to drugs. How do I keep going when I’m always in survival mode? Small Group Questions: To build connection with a friend or in your small group, ask each other these questions. 1. What trials are you currently walking through in your life? 2. Have you ever had a season in life wh...
2023-11-2130 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 55: Falling Into DarknessThe combination of Daylight Savings Time and Fall moving into Winter means things are getting dark. For many of us, that darkness creeps into our emotional state as well. Changes of season, both in the climate and in our lives can be challenging, but they also bring about opportunities for growth and positive change. This Week’s Listener Question:Christine, we just turned our clocks back in Colorado for daylight savings. I despise the fact that it’s dark before 5:00 pm now. Fall makes me feel depressed. My body and mind seem to resist...
2023-11-1425 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 54: Dealing With NegativityLet’s face it, it can be pretty challenging to deal with another person’s negative emotions. When we feel like we’re being sucked down into their pit, our first reaction is often to counter with something positive. But, as it turns out, that’s not always the best thing… either for their emotional wellbeing, or your relationship with them.This week, we talk through strategies to deal with negativity in both ourselves and the people we love… and find hard to love. This Week’s Listener Question:I have a really sulky t...
2023-11-0627 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 53: Your Cheatin' HeartNo matter how long we’ve been in a relationship, no matter how secure it feels, there are always forces and temptations out there to undermine it. Some from without, and some from within. This week, we talk about those forces and strategies to affair-proof your relationships. Listener’s Question:I read a text stream that my husband has with a woman at work. They share very private and intimate information with one another. Is this an emotional affair? Small Group Questions: To build connection with a...
2023-11-0127 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 52: Going DeeperIt’s widely believed that we admire and are attracted to people with characteristics we do not possess ourselves. As a result, our closest relationships are often with our opposites, which can make it challenging to remain close.We’ve been married to our opposites for quite a while now, so this week, we talk about why we’re different… and how to maintain deep, close connections with each other. This Week’s Listener Question:My husband doesn’t go very deep with his emotions. I’m super lonely in my marriage. I kee...
2023-10-2427 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 51: Keeping SecretsSecrets. We’ve all got them. According to one study, the average parson has five secrets they’ve never told anyone. Why do we keep them? For the most part it’s shame. And as we’ve talked about before, shame is corrosive.This week, we talk through the benefits of, and strategies for, getting things out in the open. This Week’s Listener Question:I grew up believing loyal families never share their secrets. My husband tells his golfing buddies details about our marriage and family. What do you think should be k...
2023-10-1727 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 50: Reel In Your RegretsRegrets. We've all got more than we'd like. Some of us have more than we can count...This week, we talk about three commons regrets and some strategies to keep them from weighing us down to the point where we're stuck in the past. So listen in. You won't regret it...Listener’s Question:I’m going through a divorce and I can’t get past the feeling of regret that I choose the wrong person and wasted so much time. How do I get over this? Small...
2023-10-1126 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 50: Reel In Your RegretsRegrets. We've all got more than we'd like. Some of us have more than we can count...This week, we talk about three commons regrets and some strategies to keep them from weighing us down to the point where we're stuck in the past. So listen in. You won't regret it...Listener’s Question:I’m going through a divorce and I can’t get past the feeling of regret that I choose the wrong person and wasted so much time. How do I get over this? Small...
2023-10-1126 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 49: The Sky is Falling!Bad things happen to good people, and they happen to “bad” people. They happen to everyone. When it feels like they are piling up on and around us, we can begin to “catastrophize” even the smallest of things. A headache becomes a brain tumor and our minds are off to the races. This week we talk strategies to ground our minds when we start feeling out of control. This Week’s Listener Question:One of my good friends died a few years ago from cancer. My husband just had a prostate cancer scare. Any time my...
2023-10-0327 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 49: The Sky is Falling!Bad things happen to good people, and they happen to “bad” people. They happen to everyone. When it feels like they are piling up on and around us, we can begin to “catastrophize” even the smallest of things. A headache becomes a brain tumor and our minds are off to the races. This week we talk strategies to ground our minds when we start feeling out of control. This Week’s Listener Question:One of my good friends died a few years ago from cancer. My husband just had a prostate cancer scare. Any time my...
2023-10-0327 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 48: Introverts and Extroverts... Oh, My!Introverts and Extroverts are two very different types of people. Which one are you? As you might have guessed, we’re both extroverts. But we’re married to introverts, which can sometimes be challenging. This week, we talk about how to embrace who you are and give some tips on how to integrate well with the opposites. Listen’s Question:Sometimes I feel like my husband and I are incompatible. I love to travel and spend time with girlfriends and he’s a homebody. He wants to stay home all the time. What...
2023-09-2729 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 47: Connecting in a Disconnected WorldThis week, we continue to take on loneliness by talking about solutions to help you find connections in our disconnected world. There’s something here for just about everybody! This Week’s Listener Question:My daughter left for college three weeks ago. She called to tell me how lonely she is. Oh… my heart breaks thinking of her alone in her room. I get it! I feel lonely a lot of the time too. What should we do? Small Group Questions: To build connection with a friend...
2023-09-1929 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 46: How to Overcome LonelinessLoneliness is an epidemic. Although we’ve never been more connected online, 79% of adults report being lonely. And loneliness is a killer. It’s been shown that the negative health effects of being lonely are equal to smoking 15 cigarettes a day!This week we start our two-episode look at loneliness, with some tips on how to break out and make the connections you need. This Week’s Listener Question:My daughter left for college three weeks ago. She called to tell me how lonely she is. Oh… my heart breaks thinking of her al...
2023-09-1228 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 45: Will You Take The Test?Ever heard of the Enneagram? It’s often thought of as a “personality test.” But it’s so much more than that. It’s a great way to figure out the type of person you are and recognize the strategies you use to make your way in the world.You may want to take it first, before listening to the episode www.truity.comThis week we geek out a little on the Enneagram; what it is, how it works, and what you can do with it. Key Question:Hey, I keep...
2023-09-0626 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 44: Do Hard ThingsWe’ve all heard the phrase “no pain, no gain.” Most of the time we don’t like hearing it, but it’s true. In our world of access to comfort, it’s easy to avoid the pain of doing hard things and we miss out on becoming our best selves. Small Group Questions: 1. Is there a situation right now that you’re trying to control? What leverage do you or don’t you have? 2. When Christine mentioned letting go of someone or something, what immediately came to you...
2023-08-3026 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 43: What's Your Drug Of Choice?On some level, we’re all addicted to Dopamine, the chemical our bodies secrete when we’re experiencing pleasure. And that’s a good thing… in general. But in our world of easy access to all we want, many people are able to skip the pain of getting what’s pleasurable, and are left depressed and wanting more.This week, we talk about some strategies for maintaining that balance. This Week’s Listener Question:My daughter in college smokes a lot of pot. I know it’s not addictive but I’ve noticed she’s...
2023-08-2328 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 42: The Power of WHY?Why do you do what you do?... WHY?It’s such an important question, because the process of finding the answer can lead you to your passion and purpose, and maybe even out of an unfulfilling life on autopilot. Small Group Questions: 1. What powerful insights can arise when you ask yourself – WHY do I do what I do? 2. What “tables could you turn over” in your life to be more purposeful in how you spend your time and efforts? 3. How can you tell when you’re...
2023-08-1627 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 41: Help Me Sleep!When your mind works overtime, it’s hard to get much of anything done, let alone sleep at night. And counting sheep and medicating ourselves may be quick fixes, but they won’t stave off the inevitable depression, anxiety, and irritability that go along with insomnia. This week, we tackle sleep deprivation with healthy ways to calm those out of control thoughts. This Week’s Listener Question:I haven’t been able to turn my brain off lately and I can’t fall asleep at night. I’m definitely sleep deprived and irritable all the time...
2023-08-0827 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 40: Confronting ConflictNobody likes conflict. But it will eventually show up in our relationships… all of them. How we handle it says a lot about us and will determine the future of those relationships. This week, we talk about moving from blame, criticism, and judgement to a place where we handle conflicts with curiosity and compassion. This Week’s Listener Question:I have a friend who violated my confidentiality and I’m so hurt. Should I talk to her about it or just forget about it? If I choose to confront her, how should I go abou...
2023-08-0226 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 39.: I Need You to Need MeIt’s good to be wanted and needed, and it usually feels really good to help the people in our lives… as long as that relationship is in balance.But what about when it’s not, when we’re doing for others what they could (and should) be doing for themselves? Whether that comes out of guilt, coercion, or a need to fulfill ourselves, it’s an unhealthy relational imbalance called “Co-Dependency.”This week we talk about productive, relationship-friendly ways to identify and manage our co-dependent relationships. Because we could all use a little more balance.
2023-07-2726 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 38: Body Image Part 2: Eating DisordersHow we view our bodies drives what and how we eat. And, as we talked about last week, many of us struggle to have a positive image of ourselves. So it makes sense that many women wrestle with some degree of an eating disorder. It’s sometimes subtle, but it’s there… and it’s not good. This week, we’ll walk through how to recognize an eating disorder, why it’s there, and the first steps in overcoming it. This Week's Listener Question:I’m worried about my daughter. She refuses to eat meals with...
2023-07-1827 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 37: Bathing Suit ShameSummer’s here, and for many women, so is the shame of having to show our bodies in shorts, t-shirts, or -GASP- even a bathing suit. Many of us have lived with this our whole lives, and despite knowing better, we just can’t break free. This week, we bring that shame out into the open and work through ways to squash the negative self-talk and love ourselves for the queens we are! This Week’s Listener Question:Hey Christine and Laura! Summer is a really hard time for me because I’m invited to a...
2023-07-1125 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 36: Doubling Down On DoubtIf you think about it, faith can be challenging at times. Even when we’re feeling strong in ours, others may be wavering, or even totally shut off. But it’s natural, and even healthy to doubt. Because doubting can be a catalyst for healthy conversations and introspection that can strengthen our own relationship with God. This Week’s Listener Question:I’m really frustrated because Sundays cause big arguments in my family. I end up going to church all by myself. My teenagers are really doubting the faith they grew up in and my hu...
2023-07-0428 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 34: How To Live With The Sting Of RegretEveryone makes bad choices. But they don’t have to haunt us for the rest of our lives. This week, we talk about how bad choices and regrets can actually be opportunities to learn and grow once we learn to forgive ourselves. After all, we were all just doing the best we could at the time. This Week's Listener Question:I just returned from a class reunion where I ran into an old boyfriend. Let’s just say that was a huge trigger reminding me of the choices I made during a very dark...
2023-06-2030 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 33: How Do I Decide When There’s Too Much Confusion?When faced with situations where there is no obvious solution, we are often so overwhelmed by the confusion that we grab at an answer just to “make it stop.” But confusion can be fertile ground for growth. It forces us to ask questions and learn about ourselves and our circumstances, and that curiosity is a key that opens the door to possibilities we may otherwise never have seen.This week, we talk about some ways to “clear the canvas” and listen to those parts of us that can help us arrive at the best decision. This...
2023-06-1329 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 32: Making Friends As AdultsHave you ever watched kids on a playground? Complete strangers come together and start making mud pies within minutes. Why is that so hard for us to do as adults? Even when we’ve got reasons for connection, like kids, sports teams, jobs, and neighborhood activities, it’s still hard.And that’s reflected in the latest statistics showing that loneliness is an epidemic.So how do we fix that? This Week’s Listener Question:I just moved to Colorado because of my husband’s job. I’m feeling really lonely...
2023-06-0730 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 31: What Does a Life Worth Living Look Like?How do we find the “why” in our lives? It’s a tough question on our best days. But what about after major life changes, like a death, a divorce, a job loss, or in Laura’s case this week: a charging moose? This Week’s Listener Question:What’s my purpose now that my soul has been shattered? How do I go on after losing a child? Small Group Questions: 1. What are your first reactions after hearing Christine spent a weekend with grieving mothers and Laura was char...
2023-05-2930 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 30: Get Out of Your Comfort ZoneIt’s nice and cozy in our comfort zones. So comfy, in fact, that it’s easy to get stuck there without even realizing it. But it’s when we’re outside that we develop and grow. Whether it’s a job, a relationship, or a retreat, the first thing we’ve got to do to make a change is to GO! This Week’s Question:Christine, why are you so passionate about taking women to Northern Ireland on a retreat called God, Guinness, and Girlfriends? Small Group Questions: 1. ...
2023-05-2328 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 29: When Special Days SuckHappy Mother’s Day!!!… or was it? Research shows that up to 1/3 of women won’t be happy. Whether you’re going through a loss, or you’ve built up expectations for the day that are un-met and leave you disappointed. And that’s likely true for many holidays throughout the year.This week, we talk strategies for how to let special days feed your soul rather than suck you dry. This Week’s Listener Question:Every year Mother’s Day leaves me with a grief hang-over. Why are so many holidays disappoi...
2023-05-1726 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 27: Dirty MoviesPornography. It’s everywhere. And it’s here to stay. The statistics on its usage are staggering. This week, we get into the weeds of pornography and its impact on the expectations and insecurities of our relationships. This Week’s Listener Question:I just discovered my husband has a porn addiction. I feel like he’s cheating on me. It’s making me feel really anxious all the time. How do I get him to stop? Small Group Questions: 1. After hearing the pornography statistics Laura and Christine sha...
2023-05-0326 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 26: Anxiety and Fear - Part 2This week, we pick up where we left off with some helpful tips, tricks, and hacks to manage our thoughts when they start to swirl out of control This Week’s Listener Question:I’ve been wrecked recently with anxiety and fear. I’m usually a calm, level-headed person but lately I’m feeling so out of control that I can’t sleep and I just had my first panic attack. What do you think I should do? Small Group Questions: 1. Have you experienced an increase in anxiety si...
2023-04-2627 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 25: Anxiety and Fear - Part 1Anxiety, fear, and panic attacks – Oh My!They can cause us to do some crazy things - like Laura accosting the Amazon driver who she thought stole her dog. Fear is such a powerful emotion that we needed two episodes to talk about how to recognize and manage it…. Because without an Amazon driver, you’re all alone in this world. This Week’s Listener Question:I’ve been wrecked recently with anxiety and fear. I’m usually a calm, level-headed person but lately I’m feeling so out of control that I can’t sl...
2023-04-1927 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 24: Being The Help Others NeedThis Week’s Listener Question:My high school aged daughter is spiraling deeper and deeper into depression. It’s so painful to watch and I’m scared! What can I do to help? Study after study is showing that mental health issues are becoming more and more prevalent, especially among young adults and teens. How we react and help is so important, but it’s often really hard to figure out what to do. Do we try to fix them? Rescue them? Or do we detach and avoid so they can f...
2023-04-1231 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 23: Trust When You're TornThis Week’s Listener Question:There was just another school shooting in Nashville, TN. How do I deal with the helplessness and overwhelming sadness I keep feeling? How do we keep going and trust God when bad things keep happening all around us? How do you deal with the overwhelming helplessness that comes when we’re hit with tragedy? Many of us employ the strategies of avoidance, denial, and control, which usually comes out sideways. (Like micromanaging the spatula drawer). What if we were to embrace the sadness and anger...
2023-04-0428 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 22: March MadnessAh Spring…. time to get going after a winter’s slumber. It’s getting warmer and staying lighter longer, so open the doors, start cleaning, planning, and doing. Summer’s coming! With all those added pressures, is it any wonder that mental health issues like depression, anxiety, and even suicides spike in the Spring? This week, we talk about slowing down. Giving yourself permission to put your priorities in place and establish rhythms that restore sanity in your life. Just because you’ve already lost your basketball pool doesn’t mean you have to lo...
2023-03-2928 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 21: No Good OptionsThis Week’s Listener Question:My life is a massive mess (truly a "shitshow") right now. I'm dealing with intense family conflict which makes me feel like I have to pick sides. When I do, one family member will have to move out. At the same time, my work is also exhausting and thankless. I never have time for myself or anywhere I can go to "reboot.” I feel like I'm surrounded with overwhelming demands and drowning every day. Where would you start, if you were me? What do you do when it seems l...
2023-03-2229 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 20: Kicked Out Of Bible StudyThis Week’s Listener Question:I have listened to the Soul Enchilada episodes on forgiveness whichaddress forgiving an individual. But how do I forgive the church, not anindividual, but rather a very large group of people? We hear you. We’ve each been kicked out of Bible Study before… People have high expectations of “The Church” as an institution and of the people who inhabit it, whether they work there or just go there. Which makes it harder to handle and forgive when they fall sho...
2023-03-1528 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 19: Stuck in the MiddleA “mid-life crisis” isn’t just for balding men in speedos buying sports cars. It can happen to anyone, at any age. Because it’s not about age, it’s about STAGE. We go through major life shifts every 7 years or so. But the transitions aren’t always smooth. It’s in those “spaces in between” stages where we face a choice: stay stuck out of fear, or embrace the ambiguity of change as an adventure. It is possible to move forward, you just need to embrace your inner badass And be...
2023-03-0828 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 17: What's the Point?When it comes to sex, do you ask “What’s the point?”Well good! Because you should.Sex is complicated. On one hand it’s a fantastic bonding agent, a chemical cocktail of pleasure. On the other hand, it can sometimes feel like an obligation weighed down by the baggage of body image and past experiences.This week, let’s work on our erotic intelligence, and maybe even schedule a horizontal meeting with your partner…BECAUSE YOU ARE WORTH IT! THIS WEEK’S LISTENER QUESTION:My husband want...
2023-02-2227 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 16: The Thrill is GoneSince opposites attract, it’s understandable that over time it’s possible, even easy, to drift apart to the point where you feel like you’re just roommates. Relationships can be a little like plants: you’ve got to water them a lot to keep them alive. And that takes work. What do you do when it seems like your partner just isn’t willing to put in the effort? This week we talk about three types of LOVE: Agape (unconditional), Phileos (friendship), and Eros (sex). Specifically, how to put them together as...
2023-02-1530 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 15: Valentine's Day ForeplayValentine’s Day is right around the corner, so let’s talk emotional intimacy. (We’ll get to THE SEX TALK next week. Think of it as foreplay). How we relate to those we love dictates so much of our day to day happiness, and it changes over the years. We go through phases that can either draw us closer together or drive us apart. Like everything worth having, it takes work. So listen in while we talk about daily practices to help us stay connected. Because we can’t get to the sex...
2023-02-0828 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 14: Un-Stuck YourselfStill not sure what you want to be when you grow up? Well, welcome to the club of lost women!Many of us have lived our lives according to a script written for us by society, our parents, or someone else who has no idea of who we really are. That script usually has us “being it all” as some combination of Martha Stuart, The Pioneer Woman, and (insert name of sex symbol here).But what if that’s not what we want? Or even scarier, what if we don’t...
2023-02-0125 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 13: A Crisis of ConfidenceWe’ve got hopes. We’ve got dreams. But for many of us, the idea of putting ourselves out there to go after them is just too intimidating. It may be fear of failure, it may be Imposter Syndrome,” where we’re afraid that if people saw the “real” us, they’d know we were a fraud.As women, we’ve been socialized to be humble, to not push for the promotion or ask for that raise. Because when we’re aggressive, we’re seen as bitchy.But ladies, you are uniquely equ...
2023-01-2627 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 12: Take This Job and Shove It! (should I stay or should I go?)Two classic songs for a classic problem: trouble at work. No job is perfect, but what do we do when the environment becomes toxic?When it does, many of us are torn between the part that wants to stay and fix, and the part that wants to flee. A reality of life, though, is that we often have to settle for doing a little of both. Because “if we go there will be trouble, but if we stay there will be double.”So this week, we’re talking about tips on how to view and manage...
2023-01-1828 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 11: Overwhelmed and Busting At The SeamsReady, set, go! We’ve started the new year. But what if you’re overstuffed and overwhelmed, juggling more balls than you can keep in the air?This week you’ve got permission to join us in unbuttoning your pants to make a little more room, and going through an exercise Christine calls “Dumping the Bucket.”While we can’t guarantee a better fit around the waist, we can tell you it’ll make your mind and soul a lot lighter. This Week’s Listener Question:I...
2023-01-1126 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 10:Coming Up Short: My New Year's ResolutionsThey say it takes about 90 days to form a new habit, which is probably why 92% of us fail to keep our New Year’s resolutions.So for the 8% of you who are successful, way to go! For the rest of us, it’s time to change the types of goals we set and how we view ourselves in the trying, failing, and succeeding.So listen in as we talk strategies for starting the year off right. Small Group Questions:1. How have your New Year’s resolutions worked or failed in the...
2023-01-0425 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 8: From Lunatic to Letting GoForgiving someone can be so hard that we needed TWO episodes to cover it all.Research shows that women’s brains are great at keeping a record of wrongs. So if you find yourself out of nowhere pacing back and forth, mumbling obscenities to a person who isn’t even there, it’s not your fault…..But it isn’t good, either. So tune in to this week’s conversation where we go over 5 Steps to move you from lunatic to letting go.Here's the number for The National Domestic Violence Hot...
2022-12-2227 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 7: Forgive and Forget? Yeah, Right.This week we take on conflict and forgiveness.Are you a “get over it and move on” kind of gal who avoids confrontation at all costs, or do you keep score?Join us this week, as we talk through the good, the bad, and the ugly of conflict resolution strategies.Small Group Questions:1. What conflict style was most used in your family of origin– aggressive, avoidance, passive aggressive, or assertive? 2. What fears or concerns come up for you when you think aboutasserting yourself with someone...
2022-12-1625 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 6: Holidays With HolesThis week we wrap up our Holiday deep-dive by talking about how to get through them when they’re full of holes.Those holes can be in the form of an empty seat at the table from a new loss, an old loss that continues to blindside us this time every year, or even just our own unmet expectations for how things should turn out.We never really “fill” those holes, but we can avoid getting trapped in them by giving ourselves permission to grieve… the way WE need to and on our OWN timeline .Eas...
2022-12-0926 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 5: Boundaries are BeautifulYou survived Thanksgiving! Nice job… but the holidays ain’t over yet. So this week we wanted to tackle this listener question: “I don’t get along with my in-laws. How do I set boundaries with the most difficult people in my life?” Setting boundaries before you get together may seem a little weird, like you’re being high-maintenance. But boundaries are beautiful. You can meet your needs, while at the same time honoring the needs of the people around you… even the difficult ones. How do you do it? Well...
2022-12-0225 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 4: Thanksgiving Is Not a Competitive SportThanksgiving is a couple of days away, so this week we wanted to tackle this listenerquestion: “My anxiety ramps up in social settings, so I tend dread the holidays. Any advice for preparing for, calming down, and enjoying the holidays this year?” Most of us have at least some degree of anxiety around the holiday season. It may be trying to meet the expectations of others, or those we have of ourselves. It may be the dredging up of bad memories. It may be that there’s a new empt...
2022-11-2127 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 3: Making Frienemies With Your Pissed-Off PartWe know that we’re made up of lots of different parts. But what do we do when our “pissed off” part seems to rule the roost? This week’s listener question is: “ I feel angry all the time. I’m angry at work, home, while driving, everywhere I go. How do I deal with my pissed off parts?” Suppressing anger just makes us bitter, and eventually comes out sideways in the form of broken dishes, shattered relationships, and an occasional fractured toe. This week we talk through strategy o...
2022-11-1825 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 2: Parts Is Parts We may look like we’re in one piece, but we’re really just a bunch of parts. Kind of like a junk drawer.And each part has a voice that’s competing for our attention. Whether it’s Perfectionist Peggy, Pollyanna People-Pleaser, Bitchy Queen, or just some random Pissed-Off Parts, we are constantly being nagged.This week’s question is: “What do I do when all my parts are screaming at the same time?” Well, let’s figure that out together, and see which parts we can toss out of our j...
2022-11-1100 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 2: Parts is PartsWe may look like we’re in one piece, but we’re really just a bunch of parts. Kind of like a junk drawer.And each part has a voice that’s competing for our attention. Whether it’s Perfectionist Peggy, Pollyanna People-Pleaser, Bitchy Queen, or just some random Pissed-Off Parts, we are constantly being nagged.This week’s question is: “What do I do when all my parts are screaming at the same time?” Well, let’s figure that out together, and see which parts we can toss out of our j...
2022-11-1128 min
The Soul EnchiladaSE 1: Therapy? Are You Nuts?We women are pretty good at getting help with the things we need. Car broken down? We call a mechanic… Gallbladder acting up? We call a doctor… Lost? We ask for directions… But when it comes to our emotional health, many of us choose to hold it in and try to push through alone. This week, we tackle the question: “Why are so many Christian women skeptical about therapy?” Enjoy the podcast. If you want to share it with friends or your small group, here are s...
2022-11-0424 min