Shows
How To Human94. Buffering/Numbing Out: What and WhyHello! This week's episode is about buffering and numbing out habits and behaviors, something to which most humans are susceptible. We talk about these behaviors and the why beneath them, and how we might consider relating to ourselves to help ameliorate them. See you on the inside! x
2023-03-2818 minHow To Human93. Relationship With Your BodyHello! Today's episode is one that I hope changes the conversation for you and your body. I share some thoughts, insights, a tool, and a client's story to bring home what it is to cultivate more of a relationship to our sweet bods. Such important and life changing work. See you on the inside. x
2023-03-0927 minHow To Human92. Navigating the Wild West of College: From Greek Life to RelationshipsToday's episode all about creating consciousness around our patterning, our conditioning, our stories and how those are such powerful forces in directing how we are showing up (or not) in our lives. With consciousness, we create the space to examine and question the patterns, beliefs, and stories that are not serving us, and then with grace, we edit, shed, and cultivate anew. It is thoughtful and purposeful work, and our guest, Fiona, generously shares some of her journey into consciousness and what it means to keep growing her big, beautiful, ever-growing light in a culture that messages otherwise. She's...
2023-02-1752 minHow To Human91. Attachment Styles and RelationshipsHello! 'Tis the season of love and relationships as we enter the month of February and Valentine's Day fast approaching. Today we cover Attachment Theory and our various attachment styles that we develop early in our lives and carry with us into our adult relationships. The more we understand from where we are coming and the why, the better chance we have in shifting our unhealthy patterns and cultivating new and healthier ones. With insight, change is possible. See you on the inside! x
2023-02-0322 minHow To Human90. ProcrastinationHello! Today's conversation is about something with which many of us struggle. Unlike what many people believe, procrastination isn’t a characterlogical defect or a moral failing. It is simply a way of coping with negative and challenging emotions brought on by certain tasks. Since procrastination doesn't serve us and lend itself to our growth and evolution, we talk about how to get to the root cause of it and steps we can take to loosen its hold and shift into a healthier relationship with negative emotion. Come join us on the inside! x
2023-01-2434 minHow To Human89. A Conversation with D1 Coach, Deanna Gumpf, and Getting the Most Out of Her PeopleHello! Today's conversation is with Deanna Gumpf, Notre Dame Women's Softball Coach, 22 years strong. She is one of the most highly decorated coaches in ND's history, and she shares some of her personal story and the internal workings that drive her WHY each and every day. As a key player in the the formation of our young people and Gen Z'ers, she talks about the system that she has created to help her players navigate a challenging, highly competitive environment while also growing strong leaders and good humans. Come join us on the inside! x
2023-01-1350 minHow To Human88. 3 Skills to Human Better in 2023Hello dear people, HNY! Wow. 2023. What a ride! Along the lines of loving the life that we lead, becoming the human that we are capable of being, and making the world better, Craig Brummell and I talk about 3 foundational skills to help us navigate the hard, uncomfortable, breathless, and challenging moments that we inevitably come across while humaning. It's about cultivating more honesty, self awareness, and hope in our day to day. See you on the inside! x
2023-01-0236 minHow To Human87. Why We Set Goals, Process Versus OutcomeHello! Today's episode focuses on two particular coaching tools that I utilize in my work with young adult clients around goal setting and life being a journey, not a destination. As we get more adept at this humaning thing, we learn that the gold is more in the process than the destination. This is why we set goals. Goals are the perfect honing agent for us to grow ourselves and grow our skillset of processing negative emotion on purpose. Intrigued? See you on the inside! x
2022-12-2020 minHow To Human86. Our Identity and Believing New Things on PurposeHello! Today's episode is in light of a conversation I had with a young adult client around identifying as a procrastinator. He desires to be someone who takes action but feels like he is forever cursed at being a procrastinator. As I shared with him, in order to change his identifying thought of being a procrastinator, he needs to believe new and different things on purpose before he has evidence for them. Instead of I am a procrastinator, his overarching thought can be I am someone who takes action. This is counterintuitive but so important to understand. Our brains...
2022-12-1031 minHow To Human85. A Personal Story About Listening to Our Young PeopleHello! Today's episode was done on the fly based on an experience I had with my son Ben. It is a humble sharing of how I missed some big cues as a Mom, and how Ben gave me the opportunity to circle back and do better going forward. This walk as a Mom and as a human is a forever one, and as long as I am on this earth, I am committed to doing it as well as I possibly can knowing that there will be plenty of missteps along the way. Our young people are some of...
2022-11-3010 minHow To Human85. How to Feel Better in 3 StepsHello! I think we would all like to know how how to feel better and human better. Here are 3 steps to help you in that process. Come join us in How To Human, our monthly online membership, to learn these tools and take these teachings to the next level! x
2022-11-1122 minHow To Human84. Answering the 36 Questions with My Favorite Person, Craig Brummell - Part IIHello! Welcome to Part II of Craig Brummell and me answering Arthur Aron's 36 questions. Since the questions are not run of the mill and require some vulnerability, thoughtfulness, and listening, we carved out a few hours to do the exercise from start to finish. It's perfect for a date night or Saturday morning coffee visit with your favorite person, a potentially favorite person, or someone with whom you care to know more deeply. Best of all? You'll both walk away better humans. x
2022-11-0333 minHow To Human83. Answering the 36 Questions with My Favorite Person, Craig Brummell - Part IHello! So, today is Part I of 2 episodes where my husband, Craig, and I delve into Arthur Aron's 36 questions. We've been together 26 years and married 23 of those and we both walked away from this exchange with new insights about one another. Never underestimate the power of good questions, thoughtful speaking, and hardcore listening to create deeper connection in a relationship. It took us a little bit to get warmed up but we hit our stride and had a lot of fun. Enjoy! x
As promised, here are the 36 questions shared in a New York Times article: https://w...
2022-10-2741 minHow To Human82. Senior Fall, College Apps, and All of Its LearningsHello! Those of you in the midst of the fire of senior fall of high school, and those of you who have already walked the walk, this is for you! We are going to talk about some of the growth and learnings that come out of the 'dumpster fire' of senior fall, for both parents and young adults alike. See you on the inside! x
2022-10-2228 minHow To Human81. 36 Questions that Lead to a Deeper Connection and IntimacyHello everybody! Consider listening to this episode with that someone with whom you desire to know better and create a deeper connection. The art of good questions, and the sequencing of them, creates a greater closeness with another. Have some fun with this and report back. x
2022-10-1416 minHow To Human80. The Power of Setting BoundariesHello! Welcome to today's conversation on boundaries, one of my favorite topics! We all know that healthy boundaries enhance our relationships, and the quality of our relationships enhance the quality of our lives. When and how do we set boundaries with our family, our friends, our partners, our colleagues, ourselves? The more clear we get on who we are, where our lines are, where we begin and end, and where another begins and ends, and loving and embracing the relational dance of it all, the more we sweeten what it is to human. See you on the inside. x
2022-10-0730 minHow To Human79. Challenging Relationships and How to Know When to LeaveHello Everybody! Welcome to today's episode on challenging relationships. As we are always doing in How To Human, we are shifting the focus off the other person and digging more into what is going on within us that might be perpetuating the struggle. How can we show up in any and all relationships from accountability and empowerment and less from control and judgment? Whether we stay or go is up to us but how we show up in the relationship is where our greatest power and growth resides. See you on the inside! x
2022-10-0226 minHow To Human78. Relationships and the Gift of Self AwarenessHello! Today's episode is around relational intelligence and why it matters. A foundational piece of relational intelligence is self awareness and when we grow this, we grow our relationships and enhance our lives. Because as Esther Perel says, the quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives. There's work to be done. Come join me on the inside to learn more. x
2022-09-2227 minHow To Human77. The Brain is a Meaning Making MachineHello! Today's episode is around understanding our brain's superpower of meaning making and storytelling. Since our life experience is subjective and our brain is constantly categorizing and interpreting the events in our lives, it makes good sense to build the skillset of awareness around how our brain works and learn how to become a better storyteller. See you on the inside! x
2022-09-1528 minHow To Human76. Grief and Loss and the Forever Letting GoWelcome! Today's guest is a marvelous one, Melissa VanderZyden, a clinical therapist, a dear friend, and someone who has experienced profound and deep loss in her life. She shares some of her grief journey and espouses the blessing of being a witness to each other's lives, loves, and losses. Come join us for this sweet and poignant conversation. x
2022-09-0840 minHow To Human75. How to Design A Life with Superstar Business Professor Wendy AngstToday's conversation is with Wendy Angst, a Mendoza School of Business Professor at the University of Notre Dame. Lucky for us, she is cultivating the minds and hearts of our future leaders on a daily basis and one of her most popular courses is Designing Your Life. Listen in as she shares her magic and how she and her students are paving the way to a kinder, braver, and more beautiful world. Enjoy! x
2022-09-0236 minHow To Human74. A Conversation with a D1 Coach About Curating a Culture of Belonging for our Young AdultsWelcome! Today's guest is a treat. Chris Halfpenny, the Notre Dame Women's Lacrosse Coach, is here to talk about the importance of curating a culture of belonging so our young people have the best chances to flourish, thrive, and compete on the field -- and in life. As we know, when we build and nourish the hearts, skillsets, and minds of our people, the magic unfolds. Along with elevating the room and elevating the game, she stresses keeping it simple and having some fun in the process. Go Irish! x
2022-08-1945 minHow To Human73. A Young Man's Journey of Self Discovery and Choosing a Gap YearWelcome! As a Today's special guest is my sweet 20 year old son, Ben Brummell, a rising junior at the University of Michigan. He shares his journey of self discovery and how this path has led him to choose the world as his classroom for the next 12 months. Tune in as I believe you will very much enjoy this conversation and learn some good things along the way. x
2022-08-1339 minHow To Human72. Mental Health and Learning How to Human as a Senior in High SchoolToday's episode is with Leo Brummell, a rising senior at Culver Academies, and a love of a human (he also happens to be my son so I'm slightly biased). Our conversation is around mental health and all the things that come with humaning as a young man and a high-schooler. Come join us on the inside! x
2022-08-0422 minHow To Human71. Parenting Our Young Adults with Less Ego, More LoveJoin me today as my mentor MJ and I continue the conversation on raising our young people (and ourselves!) with less ego and more love. It's about accompanying our sweet beings as they learn to express who they are while holding them accountable to being good humans. There's no greater and more important work. See you on the inside! x
2022-07-2829 minHow To Human70. What's Beneath the Ego?Hello! Today's conversation is with my mentor MJ as a follow up to last week's episode on the ego. We go a step deeper and approach the cultivation of the ego from a more of holistic and values based orientation which helps root us and our marvelous and evolving young adults in meaning and goodness. This is vital since we live in a culture that is preaching competition and individualism on the regular with little attention given to the greater whole and a deeper why. Come join us on the inside! x
2022-07-2028 minHow To Human69. The EgoToday's episode is about the ego. I am often asked what the ego is so I decided to share some background on it and offer a few stories to illustrate it in action. Tune in to learn what the ego's m.o. is and why our incredible adaptive little selves construct one in the first place. Enjoy! x
2022-07-1521 minHow To Human69. The EgoToday's episode is about the ego. I am often asked what the ego is so I decided to share some background on it and offer a few stories to illustrate it in action. Tune in to learn what the ego's m.o. is and why our incredible adaptive little selves construct one in the first place. Enjoy! x
2022-07-1420 min
How To Human68. Finding Passion and Purpose After Questioning It AllToday's episode is with a thoughtful and dear 21 year old young man who shares his experience of finding a deeper meaning and purpose on this human journey while asking the question 'What makes me really angry?' This particular inquiry led him to discover a passion and mission for which to strive going forward. For someone who has struggled to find a more compelling why, it is beautiful to witness his mind and heart open and engaged to what is possible. Come take a listen to our conversation on the inside. x
2022-06-2925 minHow To Human67. Finding A Balance in CollegeToday's lovely guest is Sarah, a rising junior at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, and an HTH ambassador. Our conversation is around when life doesn't go according to plan and what it looks like to reckon with perfection and create more of the space and grace to soften the edges and trust the process. See you on the inside! x
2022-06-2323 min
How To Human66. Sororities, Hookup Culture, Self-Care, and MoreToday's episode is a lively and vulnerable conversation with Cait and Lucy, two rising college juniors and two of our fabulous How To Human ambassadors. We cover the waterfront of things to expect as you enter college and what it looks like to find your fit, find your people, and find you. See you on the inside! x
2022-06-1557 minHow To Human65. The Importance of Mental and Emotional Health: From a Student Athlete's PerspectiveToday's guest is Cailin Bracken, a Vanderbilt University D1 lacrosse player, who shares the story of her mental health challenges during her freshman year of college and the learnings and wisdom that she gained from stepping away from her sport for a season. This reprieve helped her gain perspective, grow her inner world, and learn how to engage with herself, lacrosse, and life with more love and more freedom. Enjoy! x
2022-06-0834 minHow To Human64. Spotlight on Fiona: Growing Up with a Special Needs Sibling and Choosing A New StoryHello, dear people! Today's episode is a conversation with Fiona, a How to Human ambassador and a rising junior at USC, who tells us her story about growing up with a special needs brother and the large informer that it has been in her growth and evolution as a young woman.
She shares what it looks like to have an original story that comes from more deficit and loss and how that story changes color and grows into something more nourishing and life-giving. Give it a listen! You'll be glad that you did. x
2022-05-3137 minHow To Human63. Values and CharacterHello! This is a continuation of my conversation with my mentor, MJ, as we make the seque from Self Esteem and Self Worth to Values and Character. Such worthwhile and vital topics to keep in mind and heart as we empower this next generation. Join us! See you on the inside. x
2022-05-1737 minHow To Human62. Self Esteem and Self WorthHello, dear people! Today's episode is my first with my mentor MJ and we are talking about the issues of Self Esteem and Self Worth since they often emerge in our work with clients. MJ shares a unique and fascinating way of thinking about these things that you won't want to miss. See you on the inside! x
2022-05-1224 minHow To Human59. 7 Mental Habits for a Healthy MindHi guys! This episode is a repost as the original one had some technical issues. I am talking today about Dr. Dan Siegel's Healthy Mind Platter which is seven daily activities that make up a set of “mental nutrients” that our brain and relationships need to function at their best.
By engaging every day, in some fashion -- large or small, in each of these mental and emotional servings so to speak, we promote integration and stabilization in our life and and being and we enable our brain to coordinate and balance its activities. All important information for...
2022-05-0219 minHow To Human61. Being Held and Being FreeHello, dear people! I think the goal in parenting is how do we love our young people so that they can bring their whole selves to the table – their separate, unique, evolving, authentic, different, marvelous, light-filled selves -- and know that they are held and free?
Let's help to amplify our young people's light and not dim it. See you on the inside! x
2022-05-0219 minHow To Human60. Anxiety and ControlHello dear people! Today we are talking about anxiety and control, two things around which most of us are intimately aware either within ourselves and/or our loved ones. The focus of today's episode will be around relinquishing control of the outside world and other people to feel better, and instead, achieve more feelings of safety and control by shifting our internal dialogue and those things within our agency and control. See you on the inside! x
2022-04-2328 minHow To Human60. Anxiety and ControlHello, dear ones! Today's topic has been rearing its head often as we try to navigate the world and the climate in which we are living by trying to control the people and the external circumstances so that we can feel better. Instead, I would like to propose shifting that focus from trying to control those things outside of us and turn the spotlight inward to those things we can control: our thoughts/our stories; our feelings, and our actions. This is where our true power and agency reside. Let's go there and see what is possible! x
2022-04-2227 minHow To Human59. 7 Mental Habits for a Healthy MindHello, dear people! Today we are going to talk about brain health and mental health. I am going to share with you 7 essential activities that help strengthen our internal and relational connections, and nourish our mental and emotional well-being each day. See you on the inside. x
2022-04-1819 minHow To Human59. 7 Daily Activities for Brain Health and Mental HealthHello, dear people! Today we are going to talk about brain health and mental health. I am going to share with you 7 essential activities that help strengthen our internal and relational connections, and nourish our mental and emotional well-being each day. See you on the inside! x
2022-04-1529 minHow To Human58. Transferring Schools: Maggie's StoryHello, dear people! In this episode, we're talking about the discernment process around transferring schools. We have a special and lovely guest today who is sharing her own personal journey. Come join us on the inside to hear Maggie's story. x
2022-04-0440 minHow To Human57. Self Discovery, Daniela's JourneyHello, dear people! I have a special guest joining us today on the pod. Daniela is a 23 year old young woman with whom I have had the pleasure of coaching (and knowing!) for the last 2 years.
She is here to share her journey of self discovery and some of her key learnings along the way. Come join us on the inside for our conversation! x
2022-03-1447 minHow To Human56. Some Thoughts and Tips on this Parenting GigHello, dear people! After going for a walk this morning, I recorded this episode on some of my thoughts on parenting (and over-parenting) our young adults. I focused on 3 specific things to keep in mind and heart while educating and raising these sweet humans of ours. My hope is that these tips will give you food for thought and help you show up a little differently.
I look forward to seeing you on the inside. x
2022-03-0925 minHow To Human55. How to Be a PeachHello, dear people! Today's episode is a continuation from last week's on Being Yourself Very Well. This is more the how to version. I think you'll find some good nuggets to help you walk your very own peach path. Come join us on the inside! x
2022-02-0936 minHow To Human54. Being Yourself Very WellHello, dear ones! Today, we're talking about how to be ourselves very well and what it means to bring all of us to the world.
Do you know how to be yourself? If not, make it a priority to figure it out. I believe it is some of the most important work you will ever do. And the more we are ourselves, the more we feel a sense of belonging and worthiness.
We have work to do, people! See you on the inside! x
2022-02-0228 minHow To Human53. Your Relationship With Your LifeHello, dear people! Today's episode is a fun one. I hope as you listen to it, you consider how you are currently telling the story of your life and how you might consider narrating and believing a little differently going forward. You get to decide your beliefs, your thoughts about the people and the things in your life. No one else.
Just notice how you feel and what you do (or don't do) when you believe what you do. Your beliefs and what you choose to focus on literally creates your relationship with your life. Narrate accordingly...
2022-01-2921 minHow To Human52. Getting UnstuckHello, HTHers (How to Humaners)! Today's episode is about getting unstuck. It is not uncommon to feel a nudge inside of us, especially at the beginning of a new year, to make a change in some area of our lives, whether it be in our relationships, our work, our physical wellness, our mental wellness. These changes are desired so that we can be more of the human that we want to be and/or have the capacity to be.
I often tell people that to get unstuck is really an inside job. Our brain offers up a l...
2022-01-1922 minHow To Human51. Hope in a PandemicHello, dear people! As Viktor Frankl said: “The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way."
There are always choices to make. Every day, every hour, offers the opportunity to make a decision, a decision which determines whether we would or would not submit to those powers which threaten to rob us of our very selves, our inner freedom; which determine whether or not we become the plaything to circumstance, renouncing freedom and dignity...”
Today, we are talking about hope and cultivating more...
2022-01-1117 minHow To Human51. How to Human In a PandemicHello, dear people! There’s always an ongoing invitation to live and human a little differently than maybe we are doing right now. We have no blueprint for how to human during a pandemic so today we are talking about some foundational things we can do to ease the road.
Know that we can carry the heavy with us AND keep walking. As we travel this unfamiliar and unsettling road of all things COVID, we have the capacity to build our adaptability muscle, utilize our Plan B, find joy and softness in our days, seek out support an...
2022-01-0826 minHow To Human50. In We Must GoHello, dear people. Today, we are going to talk about a pathway to true belonging which is a kind of spiritual practice for all of us.
It is a willingness to go inside of ourselves and explore, excavate, and integrate all the parts of ourselves – the light and the dark. A big part of this practice includes getting better at naming and feeling all of our feelings.
Come join us on the inside! x
2021-12-1421 minHow To Human49. The Art of Talking to OurselvesHello, dear people! Today we are going to talk about the art of talking to ourselves because in order to create a healthier relationship with ourselves, we need to talk more and listen less to our brain. Although our brain believes that it has our best interest at heart, it often feeds us faulty and self defeating messages. What makes it even more interesting is that we humans tend to passively listen to what our brain tells us to think and then we believe whatever we think. I think it's just good to know that our brain isn't always...
2021-12-0820 minHow To Human48. Wholehearted FamiliesHello, dear people! In light of Thanksgiving and the many families that are gathering this week and gearing up for the holiday season, I wanted to share some thoughts on how to cultivate living more wholeheartedly. Our young people are watching us and learning from us in what we do and how we live more than what we say. What greater incentive than to live from worthiness and belonging and to model this for our young people on a day to day basis.
Instead of trying to raise perfectly happy, perfectly successful, perfectly attractive, perfectly achieving young p...
2021-11-2423 minHow To Human48. The Dance of RelationshipsHello, dear people! The dance of relationships and the you, me, we interplay is what helps us know ourselves and grow ourselves. And we don’t get to know ourselves by ourselves, do we?
It really is a combination of how we see ourselves and how others see us. I share two client stories in this episode as illustrations of the dance, and the growth potential in each. Hope to see you on the inside! x
2021-11-2121 minHow To Human47. Self-LoveHello, dear ones! Today's topic is a good one: Self-love is our ability to see ourselves as imperfect humans and still hold ourselves in high regard. It's being able to see our imperfect selves and embrace it all – the light, the dark, and the multitude of our parts.
See you on the inside! x
2021-11-1226 minHow To Human46. The Life Cycle of Our EmotionsHello, dear ones! Today, we are going to be talking emotions and the concept that each one our emotions has a beginning, a middle, and an end.
Emotions are cycles that happen in our bodies. They are neurological events that are happening not just in our bodies but in our nervous systems. The most powerful response we can have to our emotions is to turn toward the difficult and uncomfortable emotions with a dose of curiosity, kindness, and compassion, and allow ourselves to complete the life cycle of our emotions from beginning to end.
It's a...
2021-11-0224 minHow To Human45. Why We People PleaseHello, dear ones! Welcome to a new week, a new topic. People pleasing is not aligned with what is most true because it’s really about us trying to control how people view us and making sure that we are safe and that we are okay in the eyes of others. Why do we do it? It is unconscious manipulation often learned in our earliest conditioning. Tune in for more! See you on the inside. x
2021-10-2227 minHow To Human44. Body ImageHello, dear ones! This is just another topic around which we have the capacity to create deeper awareness and cultivate greater consciousness. It's a conversation that warrants our attention as body image is something with which we all grapple in some way, shape, or form.
It's important to separate our body which is a vehicle to move through life, and the inherited body image we all have been given via our families, our culture, and our society.
Today's episode will help you see that it is possible to loosen our grip on the image and a...
2021-10-0825 minHow To Human43. RegretHello, dear ones! If you want to feel free of past regrets, you have the opportunity to take responsibility for your life now.
You get to choose your thoughts and feelings on purpose. You get to re-narrate, and recalibrate where and when needed. You don’t need to change the past to love the life you have now, you just have to change your thoughts. See you on the inside! x
2021-09-3031 minHow To Human42. How To Feel BetterHello, dear people! What if I told you that we have the ability to feel better by managing our mind and creating more empowering thoughts and beliefs that help us feel better, show up better, and do better.
Our job is becoming aware and assessing our thoughts and our beliefs in any given moment and considering alternative thoughts that actually feel better in our bodies and produce more of the action and the result that we are seeking. It's our superpower as humans and it is one that we all benefit from harnessing. See you on the i...
2021-09-2327 minHow To Human41. Living in the World of ANDHello! Today we are going to talk about the benefits of the AND, my favorite conjunction (and sometimes noun!), and the opportunity we have to utilize this word and its expansiveness in how we think and interpret our circumstances. This 3-letter world has the capacity to shift our internal narrative—especially when we are feeling stuck, overwhelmed, and believing that all is lost. Instead of living in the world of absolutes and all or nothing, good or bad, we can consider another alternative in the land of AND.
Come join us on the inside to hear more! x
2021-09-0818 minHow To Human40. Transitions: Take TwoHello, dear people! I decided to do another episode on Transitions as so many of us are in the midst of our own personal life transitions while also juggling the transition we are all being impacted by in our country and across the globe with the pandemic. As we are finding out on this human journey, no one can escape life's inevitable transitions. It's part of the human experience.
But, what we can have more control over is our coping styles and ways of engaging and being in relationship with ourselves and whatever change that we are f...
2021-08-3030 minHow To Human39. 13 Tips to Ease Transition to College and BeyondHello, dear ones! Since many of us our not as informed, practiced, and equipped in the best practices of how to honor our emotional and psychological needs during difficult times of transition, I thought I’d do an episode on it today. I'm thinking most especially of our young people venturing into boarding school, college, and beyond.
It's known that the more flexible, dynamic, and varied our inner-skills, the better our hearts and immune systems can work to navigate struggles, new landscapes, and hard things. Tune in on the inside to learn some of my tips to hel...
2021-08-2421 minHow To Human38. Dating Questions and Insights for TwentysomethingsHello and welcome to today's episode! This is not just for the twentysomethings out there but for any of you in a relationship. The more you learn who you truly are, and the more you grow in emotional maturity, the more you will attract someone on that same path.
I share 11 questions to share with you and your partner to see where from where you are both coming, and to where you want to go. Have some fun with this and see where you land. And know that the more you align with your partner on desire...
2021-08-0924 minHow To Human37. Belonging Versus Fitting InHello! Today's episode is primarily for my young adults out there, but there are also some messages and takeaways for you awesome parents as well.
Finding our tribes and true belonging is a dance of contorting, adapting, assessing, trying things on for size, exploring, and digging in. Our young adults are in the midst of answering the question Who am I so there is a certain amount of contorting necessary to figure this out by trying things on for size and seeing what fits.
It's important to give ourselves the whole experience of something and s...
2021-08-0426 minHow To Human36. 12 Things to Consider When Raising Our Awesome HumansToday's topic is one that will keep showing up in future episodes because it is something about which I am hugely passionate. There is so much to cover on this front, but for now, here are 12 important things to keep in our hearts and minds when raising teenagers.
Each one of the 12 have crossed my coaching radar in some way, shape or form recently so they feel particularly pertinent to share. It is not easy to grow up in this world of ours. I believe that the more we understand, the more we know, and the more w...
2021-07-2823 minHow To Human35. The Magic of FeelingsHello! This episode is about feelings and the importance of feeling our feelings because they are an integral part of the messy and marvelous job of humaning. Research will tells us that if we’re willing to feel our feelings and manage them accordingly, our anxiety, our depression, our sadness, and our struggle will be softened and often ameliorated. It’s truly a magical elixir to the unnecessary suffering we create on our own by our avoidance and inability to feel.
We are not here to allow our feelings to grow unmanaged, instead, we are here to allow...
2021-07-2024 minHow To Human34. How to Create Real and Lasting ChangeHello, dear ones! Today's episode is on how to enact true, lasting change in our lives. It's starts with awareness, and a willingness to change our limiting beliefs, and then a willingness to go all in. It means learning how to think and believe differently – because we know that our beliefs create our feelings, and our feelings generate our action/inaction. So, if we want to get different results and create a life that we love, we need to think differently, and then apply this shift in our actions and in our choices going forward. Awareness is key but app...
2021-07-1426 minHow To Human33. A Young Woman's Journey Back to HerselfHello! Today's episode is a conversation with lovely Mara Timmeney, one of my young adult clients. She shares how she has grown and navigated this being human thing, post college and in the working world, and shifting from her m.o. of being a people pleaser to speaking more of her truth and living more authentically. This shift has been profound as it has elevated her relationship with self and with others -- and sweetened her life journey overall. She's a wise one. Come join us on the inside! x
2021-07-0533 minHow To Human32. Transitions: Brummell StyleWelcome! Our family is in the midst of another transition, a move back to our beloved Midwest, and we thought we might share our process and our experience with those of you in transition yourselves. Change can be a wild, tumultuous, and exhilarating ride, and if we are willing to engage with it, it is ripe for growth and transformation. Tie a knot and hang on – and make sure that you are holding space for all the feelings, all the discomfort, all the hard, and staying true to your WHY.
Let go, open up and grab on, my...
2021-06-2836 min
How To Human32. Happiness From the Inside OutHello, dear ones! Today's episode is about cultivating our happiness from the inside out, instead of seeking it from the outside in. Ultimately, we want to feel better feelings to have a better life. This doesn’t mean we feel good all the time. It's not about perfection. It's about going into the world with with our eyes and hearts wide open. It's about being human and engaging with the contrast: the light and the dark, the highs and the lows, the pain and the sweetness, the fear and the freedom, the joy and the sorrow. Come join in th...
2021-06-2237 minHow To Human31. Knowing When to Pivot: College EditionToday’s special guest is a rising junior in college and a love of a human, Blakely Spoor. She shares her path of learning how to know when to pivot and her journey into self awareness based on her freshman year of college experience.
Blakely believes in having a strong vision for her life, cultivating an inner dialogue that creates softness, developing daily rituals that are intentional and nourishing, shifting gears if and when warranted, and seeking what is true and joy-filled.
This episode is food for thought for those of you struggling to find yo...
2021-06-0947 minHow To Human30. UncertaintyHello! Today, my husband, Craig, and I talk about uncertainty and how we navigate it individually and collectively. As we all know, uncertainty is one of our brain's least favorite things and yet it is the essence of the being human. Our superpower though is to manage and nourish our minds, our hearts, and our souls whatever our life circumstances.
Take a moment to put yourself in any circumstance. Are you resisting what is or choosing to engage with it and be in relationship with it? Work with it? Move with it?
We talk about w...
2021-06-0330 minHow To Human29. Conformity and AuthenticityHello! Today, we are going to discuss why we conform and from where the need to conform comes. We then dig into the why around our draw as humans to be considered normal and why normal isn’t all that it is cracked up to be. From there, we round out the discussion with the wisdom of taking the road less traveled which is often the road to freedom and the road of authenticity. See you on the inside! x
2021-05-2738 minHow To Human28. Navigating the First Year of College - Part 2Come join us for the 2nd part of our conversation with our son, Ben Brummell, and all things first year of college. So many learnings for him -- as a student and as a human -- and so many learnings for us -- as parents. The journey continues. Glad to be sharing the road with all of you good people! x
2021-05-1740 minHow To Human27. Navigating the First Year of College - Part 1Welcome to a 2-part series on the First Year of College Experience from the perspective of our son, Ben Brummell, who just finished his freshman year. Along with Ben sharing his learnings, Craig and I share some of our parenting takeaways. Freshman year was a learning process for all of us. We’d love for you to join us on this journey as we share our family's experience. See you on the inside! x
2021-05-0842 minHow To Human26. Shame and its Antidote EmpathyToday we are going to dig a little deeper into what Shame is and how we can change our relationship with it so that it is no longer controlling us and minimizing us. Although we can’t completely ameliorate shame, it's part of the human package, we can soften it and temper it and engage with it differently with a healthy dose of empathy. I’ll share some of our thought patterns around shame, some ways we can shift our thinking around it, along with sharing some client examples of shame, and then we’ll discuss how to douse our sh...
2021-04-3040 minHow To Human25. Being VulnerableToday we are going to talk about vulnerability because, let’s be honest, we live in a vulnerable world. So, I think it would benefit all of us to get better at being vulnerable. Who's with me? Along with talking about vulnerability, we are going to talk about what holds us back from showing up and going all in, and then we’ll cover the thought work we can do around vulnerability that will help us change our relationship with it. Hope to see you on the inside! x
2021-04-2333 minHow To Human24. Worry, Control, Beliefs, and a Parenting ManifestoToday, we are going to talk about three things that we can do as parents to soften the edges and create more connection with our young adultsI 1) Less worry and more trust; 2) Less control and more letting go; and 3) Shift thoughts and beliefs that perpetuate our worry and need for control. I share Brene Brown's Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto at the end. x
2021-04-1444 minHow To Human23. Parenting Our Young AdultsHello, dear ones! I am often asked the question: How do we raise healthy, happy, successful, and good humans? And I don’t think there is a perfect formula. But, I do believe that we have power and influence and an integral part to play in raising our young people so CB and I are going to talk about two areas that we see as our greatest gift and our greatest responsibility to our four kids: the parental relationship and the marital relationship. See you on the inside. x
2021-04-0543 minHow To Human22. Through Adversity We Grow in ResilienceToday, we are going to talk about emotional resilience and the ability to handle and overcome adversity, embrace vulnerability, and all the while, grow in wisdom on this human journey. This is a vital skill set for our young people – and frankly, for all of us – to develop. See you inside! x
2021-03-3036 minHow To Human21. The Gift of DiscomfortBy creating a relationship with discomfort, it opens our hearts and draws us out of our known and our comfortable, and helps us seek growth by having the courage to embrace the discomfort that is a natural and essential part of the human journey. Come join me on the inside as I share the journey of our family's gift of discomfort, Guatemala style. x
2021-03-1630 minHow To Human20. Performance AnxietyToday I want to talk about one of the biggest areas of struggle, doubt, and discomfort that I hear from my clients, and that is performance anxiety. And along with talking about what performance anxiety is and its ability to wreak havoc in our lives if we allow it, I would like to discuss ways to soften it, manage it, and shift the whole energy around it to something that serves us and helps us show up and contribute, even when, and especially when, anxiety is part of the package. Join us on the inside! x
2021-03-0932 minHow To Human19. Living from AbundanceHello, dear ones! On today's episode, we talk about the scarcity and abundance mindset and how overwhelming research tells us that our mindset can radically affect the course of our life. The way you lean in the world in terms of your mindset can drastically change how you love, the way you learn, how you handle stress, how you create success, your resiliency, and even how your immune system functions. I share some examples on scarcity and abundance, and how each generate something so different. See you on the inside! x
2021-03-0233 minHow To Human18. Making DecisionsI believe decisions are what help us grow and evolve and create the life that we love. Decision-making is a skill, a bit of an art, and it requires practice and growing into ourselves to get really good at it. For my teenagers and young adults listening, just know that this practice of being decisive is an effective and necessary part of that emotional toolkit that you’re building but it takes time. Trust the process, my friends. Start small, and build as you go. For today’s episode, I am going to talk about why making decisions might be d...
2021-02-2227 minHow To Human17. Love Always WinsHello! Love always wins is true across the board, but loving ourselves is the hardest work we’ll ever do. The better we get at loving ourselves, the better we are at loving this life journey and loving those with whom we share this wild and wonderful ride. What's not to love about that? Come join me on the inside as we talk about unconditional love and the gift of giving this to ourselves.
2021-02-1528 minHow To Human16. Self ConfidenceToday's episode is on how to cultivate self confidence. It's one of my favorite topics on which to coach my clients. Self confidence is a skill that we all have the ability to grow but it requires an inherent trust and belief in self and an intentionality, practice, and commitment. Come join me as we discuss some of the common obstacles in our way and how best to navigate those along with some daily practices that help us develop more of the confidence muscle. See you on the inside! x
2021-02-1132 minHow To Human15. AnxietyHello, and welcome! Today’s episode is on the light and breezy topic of Anxiety. We are going to put a face to it since it is often mysterious for many and it thrives on vagueness. Topics include: 1) What anxiety is and how our thoughts are the primary drivers of it, 2) Context/Background as to why we all experience anxiety at some level as humans, 3) What anxiety feels like in the body and the importance of paying attention to this and naming it, 4) The different ways that we tend to react to anxiety, and finally, 5) We’ll talk about some...
2021-02-0237 minHow To Human14. Marriage: A Space for Healing and GrowthWelcome! For today’s episode on marriage, I have a special guest: my sweet husband, Craig Brummell. We will be specifically focusing on three things: 1) How much we have grown in awareness and consciousness of our own early agendas, our own egos, our own unspoken manuals for one another; 2) How we have become more intentional in our relationship – and stepped out of auto pilot; and finally, 3) How do we grow and enrich our relationship and one another while ensuring that we are taking care of our own emotions, our own needs, and our own wants? Join us on our firs...
2021-01-2532 minHow To Human13. The Power of Reparenting OurselvesReparenting is a gift that we can give ourselves.
Hello, dear ones! I hope you will join us for this episode on reparenting. Reparenting is the work of adulthood: it is to learn to be the wise and loving parent to ourselves that we didn’t have growing up. It isn't about victimhood; instead, it is about getting really honest with ourselves. It is about embracing vulnerability, learning how to love and care for ourselves, strengthening the mind, getting comfortable with the uncomfortable, and preparing to get to know ourselves. What's not to love? See you on th...
2021-01-1926 minHow To Human12. Loving YourselfIn this episode, we talk about learning how to love yourself. It is a journey, a process, an ever-evolving unfolding, and as you walk this road, remember not to judge and measure every part of the process. Instead, be willing to trust, allow, and witness. When you create consciousness, you get to choose who you are, what you believe, how you feel, and how you show up for this life. And when you do this, the whole world opens up for you. Come join us!
2021-01-1137 minHow To Human10. RelationshipsToday, we are talking about relationships and how best to cultivate conscious and healthy ones. It is helpful to understand that our relationships are perfect windows into our minds and into our upbringings. As we go on this journey, we begin to shift from our early conditioning of relationships and learn to engage with ourselves and others from a freedom, curiosity, compassion, awareness, and vulnerability. Come join us as we set the foundation for future episodes on this brilliant and captivating topic.
2021-01-0416 minHow To Human9. ShameShame is a beast. And most interestingly, it is caused by our thoughts about ourselves. Being human means that none of us are immune to feeling shame, and many of us feel shame about specific actions we've taken in the past. Listen in to hear about the thoughts that create shame, the actions that we take or don’t take when we feel shame, and what we can do to rise above shame.
2020-12-2721 minHow To Human8. ComparisonIn this episode, we talk about how comparison may be keeping you from truly thriving. Comparison rears its head in many areas of the human journey, so it's important to understand how this thought pattern has a tendency to hold you back, keep you small, and create a winner/loser mindset. I share some insights on why we humans are so drawn to comparison and what we can do in place of it to create more peace and freedom to savor what is, and cultivate a beautiful life.
2020-12-2029 minHow To Human7. BoundariesIn today’s episode, I am going to teach you what a boundary is, why they are important, why they might be hard to set at first, and then how to actually set one. Boundaries are rarely modeled for us growing up yet they are an essential ingredient in healthy relationships. Come join me as we delve into the art of boundary setting.
2020-12-1331 minHow To Human6. People Pleasing - Whose Opinion Matters Most?People pleasing is where we gain our sense of self through what other people think of us. We attempt to control someone's opinion of us so that we can feel better. Often, this takes the form of lack of boundaries and neglecting our own needs. This exhausting cycle is something we can jump off of and create a new way of being where we have clear boundaries, we allow people their own opinions, we do not take it personally, and we learn to love and honor ourselves. So, come join me on this journey of letting go of people...
2020-12-0735 minHow To Human5. The Truth About PerfectionismIn today’s episode, we are going to talk about why we strive for perfection. We will cover the hallmarks of a perfectionistic brain/mindset, the multiple downsides to it, and some healthier and more sustainable alternatives.
2020-11-3031 minHow To Human4. Rejection and the College Admissions ProcessFor many, the college admissions process is their first real taste of rejection. In this episode, we discuss how to navigate rejection and various approaches to strengthening the rejection muscle while shifting the narrative around what it means -- and all the while softening the edges and creating a plan B.
2020-11-2327 minHow To Human3. Failure and Success Go Hand in HandJoin me as we talk about failure being the stepping stone to success and evolution as a human being. Success requires getting really good at failure – and getting really bad at playing it safe and small. I am a believer that failure is not the opposite of success, it’s actually a stepping stone. It’s the learning required, it’s the muscle group necessary to achieve bigger goals and become an even more evolved version of ourselves.
2020-11-1635 minHow To Human2. How to Feel your Feelings 101Since feelings are a core part of being human, and feeling our feelings is an essential piece to our emotional and mental health, join me on the podcast today as I discuss the process of how to experience your emotions. Interested to learn more about Marta? You can find her at www.martabrummell.com.
2020-11-0928 min