Shows
Romancing Nancy Drew19x01: Digest 58: The Flying Saucer Mystery!Gather round and listen to the Nancy Drew/X-Files/LSD crossover you have never in your life wanted. Nancy and her entire entourage head to The Forest to hunt a UFO! They run into a Grizzled Kindly Mountain Guy/Animal Whisperer! Nancy and Ned talk to each other telepathically! It's the most bonkers thing ever.
2024-09-2030 minRomancing Nancy Drew18x04: Files 44: Scent of Danger!Big cats in zoos? Boring. Big cats in passenger vehicles? Heck yeah. Nancy and her entourage are investigating the theft of several civets (Babou!) from the River Heights Zoo because George's hot (dumb) crush Owen is prime suspect. Owen is a charisma vacuum. Nancy is the most accurate 18 year old she's been yet for this plot. Also she leaves a villain to potentially be fatally mauled and it's fab. Ned has an answering machine message cameo but it's cute!
2024-07-1953 minRomancing Nancy Drew18x03: Files 43: False Impressions!Nancy is framed! Sadly, she doesn't go on the lam with Ned and end up in a seedy motel room. Some hussy slapped on a wig, borrowed Nancy's name, and bilked some rich idiots in Ned's hometown out of some cash, and Nancy is of course the prime suspect. Bess goes full Spirit Halloween and turns Nancy into River Heights's cattiest reporter. Light B&E! Perp walking! This one has it all!
2024-06-2843 minRomancing Nancy Drew17x06: Mystery Stories 56: The Thirteenth Pearl!Nancy's father asks her to connect with a jeweler, Mr. Moto, who was robbed of an expensive pearl necklace which belongs to a socialite (Paris Hilton). Nancy and Carson end up heading to Japan and are threatened with math riddles! Then they come back and Ned escorts Nancy to a cult party while they're in full prom. It's bonkers and the last of the Mystery Stories (real ones, anyway)!
2024-03-151h 03Romancing Nancy Drew17x05: Mystery Stories 55: Crocodile Island!In which Nancy channels Steve Irwin and hangs out with wildlife. Carson's old college buddy Mr. Gonzalez has fallen for a crypto scam and Nancy and the girls head to Florida to check it out. This one is flat out bonkers. There are also submarines, though, so at least there's that.
2024-03-081h 02Romancing Nancy Drew17x04: Mystery Stories 54: The Strange Message in the Parchment!In which the lambs are quite loud! Nancy's old friend, whose family owns a pretty big sheep farm, invites Nancy to check out a mysterious parchment picture that her dad recently bought, and then Nancy gets involved in a weird Hitchcock/Sopranos crossover episode featuring human trafficking. So, a normal week for her. Also, Nancy invites her entire entourage to the farm for some undercover work, as usual.
2023-11-1743 minRomancing Nancy Drew17x01: Mystery Stories 51: The Glowing Eye!Ned is missing and Carson has a sidepiece. Nancy is DISTRAUGHT. This book also has the BEST post-kidnapping reunion scene. Hollywood, turn THIS into your next attempt at Nancy Drew media, you cowards.
2023-10-061h 15Romancing Nancy Drew16x05: Files 40: Shadow of a DoubtA very special Nancy Drew Files/Archer crossover! The Drew residence is receiving creepy hangup calls and threats stemming from a man Carson defended 8 years earlier; he was acquitted but the man who was convicted for the crime has just been released--and is claiming innocence. Carson tells Nancy to ABSOLUTELY stay out of it, so she starts investigating immediately. On your Files Bingo card, this hits Domestic Violence, Oh No Corpse!, and Mustang Totaled. (Ned is offscreen but missed terribly!)
2023-09-2955 minRomancing Nancy Drew16x04: Files 39: The Suspect Next Door!It's Nancy and Ned's anniversary!!!!! Also Nancy gets entangled in her 16-year-old neighbor Nikki's terrible decision to date an emotionally abusive jerk who winds up dead. This is also the "pilot" for the short-lived River Heights series, introducing a bunch of dramatic high schoolers who Nancy is basically exasperated by, so that tracks. This book is 1000% redeemed by the making out by my OTP, though.
2023-09-221h 03Romancing Nancy Drew16x03: Files 38: The Final Scene!The epic Nancy Drew/Phantom of the Opera crossover event! Nancy is helping Bess sneak into a huge space cowboy movie star’s dressing room during his movie premiere because she had a crush on him when they were in high school together (he’s 3 years older and a total himbo) but things go terribly wrong (not in a sexy way) and Nancy and George have to race to save Bess before the old theater is demolished. OSHA has questions.
2023-09-1547 minRomancing Nancy Drew16x02: Files 37: Last Dance!Ned is back!!! Nancy’s just-for-this-book-bestie Laurie has fallen for a charismatic former dancer turned DJ who now runs a (booze free???) dance club in River Heights. However, someone is starting trouble at the club and threatening Laurie (Michael Myers????) so Nancy’s entourage shows up to investigate while she snoops and plays waitress (again, Ned is a costume enthusiast). My theory is a little spicier.
2023-09-0854 minRomancing Nancy Drew15x05: Mystery Stories 50: Double Jinx!Nancy is canonically a witch now. I don’t make the rules. In a weird turn of events, a company wants to build affordable housing (good) but they’re being jerks (bad). Nancy and her friends violate seat belt laws and contract the Bird Flu while saving a Tiger King-y casual apiary from Callous Developers. Also Nancy REALLY wants to help nurse Ned back to health. I really think she has that nurse outfit ready for just this occasion, y’all.
2023-08-2555 minRomancing Nancy Drew15x04: Mystery Stories 49: The Secret of Mirror Bay!Aunt Eloise, who is somehow making bank, invites Nancy and her entourage to a cabin near Cooperstown to investigate a mysterious figure who has been spotted in the mist on the water. The figure leads them to a search for a child’s coach (like an 1800s Power Wheels) buried somewhere in the bay. Also, the Jolly Green Normal Sized Bro is haunting the local woods to keep randos away from some vague illicit activity, AND one of Nancy’s evil twins is out defrauding citizens. So a normal vacation for everyone. Also Ned is working on his 15th PhD, this...
2023-07-1449 minRomancing Nancy Drew15x03: Mystery Stories 48: The Crooked Banister!In which Nancy hunts for Elon Musk, but only catches a Sea Org member! Carson is investigating an eccentric inventor who is using his weird creative genius in two ways: perfecting a murder robot and swindling people by “selling” them land on reservations (of course). Elon has a weird unsettling house surrounded by a moat with water that can catch on fire, staffed by said murderbot. Nancy and Carson also take a side quest to Arizona and decide that indigenous people on reservations DO have it rough, y’all.
2023-06-1656 minRomancing Nancy Drew15x02: Mystery Stories 47: The Mysterious Mannequin!Carson receives an unsolicited Turkish prayer rug with a secret message woven into the design, asking him to bring a mannequin. Carson’s client Farouk had a Turkish rug shop in town that had a mannequin in the window, so it seems related, and Nancy and her friends set off to find Farouk and the mannequin. Nancy also saves a toddler from drowning in a river, and Bess remains on brand as a perfume enthusiast. Togo gets to battle with an intruder. There’s a romantic Nancy/Ned picnic! No skulls, though, so at least there’s that.
2023-06-0956 minRomancing Nancy Drew15x01: Mystery Stories 46: The Invisible Intruder!Nancy is again in need of enrichment in her enclosure, so a bunch of married swingers take her and her entourage on a ghost busting adventure, to FIVE creepy destinations. The last is a house full of HUMAN (and animal) SKULLS, so they weren’t wrong on that. Ned gets kidnapped and Nancy is nearly intentionally drowned! There’s just a lot going on!!!
2023-06-021h 08Romancing Nancy Drew14x06: SuperMystery 3: Shock Waves!In which everyone hits up Padre Island for Spring Break! Nancy’s invited there by her camp buddy Mercedes (Selena Gomez), who is dating disaster himbo Buck (Ryan Hansen), and the Hardys (themselves) decide to crash this tender, hormone-flooded reunion. Ned is there too, and there are SEVERAL make out sessions AND banging opportunities for my OTP, so I am one happy narrator for this pirate treasure romp. They also discover a corpse, natch, because if you invite Nancy Drew, you need to just plan for corpses.
2023-05-261h 18Romancing Nancy Drew14x05: Files 35: Bad Medicine!In which Nancy goes undercover as a candy striper (Ned is VERY INTERESTED in her cute li’l outfit) to discover who has it out for Ned’s doctor friend Trevor (Ryan Gosling with Barbie-movie hair). Trevor’s fiancé April (Pelican Brief era Julia Roberts in one of those bad wigs) is upset because her sick father’s prognosis isn’t great, and then he dies! Did Trevor do it? Was it natural causes? Will we ever find that corpse??? Guest stars are Jeremy Piven, Parker Posey, and Giovanni Ribisi.
2023-04-281h 05Romancing Nancy Drew14x04: Files 34: Vanishing Act!Nancy, who needs enrichment in her habitat, is persuaded (ridiculously easily) to follow up on the faintest clue in the three year old disappearance of a hot rock star (John Stamos). Bess persuades veejay Luke from General Hospital to sponsor Nancy’s improv murder-mystery destination vacation at his MTV-lite station. L Ron also appears as the channel president with mutton chop sideburns, and Tawny Kitaen has a fun cameo. Lots about “just because we can, should we?” and “how much do we owe Byronic heroes?”
2023-04-141h 08Romancing Nancy Drew14x03: Files 33: Danger in DisguiseNancy, who REFUSES to acknowledge that people die when she gets involved in politics, is helping sudden political enthusiast George volunteer for a local politician’s re-election campaign when she overhears a conspiracy to commit murder. They arrive too late to stop it, and the sole clue leads them to a construction site. Nancy ends up helping an immigrant who forged his identity find out who’s blackmailing him, because just like in Clue in the Diary, when the hardworking reluctant lawbreaker is white, Nancy will do a solid. Ned’s letterman jacket makes a cameo. Also, ya girl is a tota...
2023-04-071h 02Romancing Nancy Drew14x02: Files 32: High Marks for MaliceNed takes Nancy on a road trip to an exclusive private college to meet his hot, wealthy childhood bestie (Chris Evans), but he’s injured before they see him. Nancy has to discover who would hurt Captain America, why Bryce Dallas Howard is apparently plotting her murder, and how to bang Ned on every available surface (probably?). So many computers! So little time! (Misogyny was the villain all along!)
2023-04-0158 minRomancing Nancy Drew14x01: Files 31: Trouble in TahitiA friend of a friend slides into Nancy’s DMs hoping Nancy can track down whoever is sending creepy notes indicating a yacht death 5 years ago wasn’t an accident. Nancy heads out to paradise to get threatened with a spear gun like at least five times, judo chop a beret-wearing hothead, and literally choke out Jared Leto. She also makes brief but meaningful besties with a great white shark. Strap in, aspiring marine biologists!
2023-03-251h 10Romancing Nancy Drew13x05: Mystery Stories 45: Spider Sapphire Mystery!Colonialism ahoy! But first, Ned-napping! Nancy and her entourage are planning to join an Emerson trip to East Africa (I KNOW) when Ned goes missing. He’s recovered in time for the trip, and Nancy has two mysteries to solve: why someone is claiming an artificially created sapphire with a spider embedded inside was STOLEN from a guy who had a naturally-occurring one, AND the ultimate fate of a missing safari guide. Also, George may or may not develop a crush on a girl after Bess gives said girl a 90s teen movie makeover. Near death experiences all around!
2023-03-171h 08Romancing Nancy Drew13x03: Mystery Stories 43: Mystery of the 99 Steps!Nancy heads to France to kick butt and help solve a friend (Keira Knightley)’s PTSD! She’s just a giving person that way. This is a real weird one, where we find out that Bess and George totally stan Joan of Arc, and John Slattery plays the client in the Perry Mason sub-mystery, The Case of the Frightened Financier.
2023-02-2456 minRomancing Nancy Drew13x02: Mystery Stories 42: The Phantom of Pine Hill!It’s 1965 and we’re getting all colonial! Nancy and the girls head to Emerson for June Week slash orgy time and end up staying with queer elder Uncle John, whose house is being haunted by a particularly greedy phantom. Nancy is menaced by a dude who is one traffic stop away from going full serial killer. There’s a memorable sequence involving crew racing (or crew racing as a metaphor!) and Nancy and Ned almost certainly hook up a dozen times. Ned gets the crown (and the deeply inappropriate headdress!) this time around!
2023-02-171h 14Romancing Nancy Drew13x01: Mystery Stories 41: Clue of the Whistling Bagpipes!In which Nancy is pursued by Sea Org members to Scotland, where she finds their sheep graveyard. (This is not a happy sheep story.) Carson is tapped to handle turning an estate over to the National Trust, because it belongs to Nancy’s maternal great-grandmother, and a family heirloom she was to inherit has disappeared. Also, a bunch of sheep. Ned, fresh back from government shenanigans in Central America, becomes Nancy’s stateside deputy while she’s doing her Outlander tour. She is fair gamed but emerges victorious!!!
2023-02-101h 09Romancing Nancy DrewNew Year’s Evil!In SuperMystery 11, Nancy and Bess head to Canada right after Christmas to investigate sabotage on the set of a very dumb Lifetime movie being worked on by Bess’s cousin. Frank and Joe are hanging out with a bigwig in the ice car racing (???) community. It’s like someone took a Lifetime Christmas movie, Talladega Nights, and a CW show and threw them in a blender. Ned gets a mention but at least there’s no shenanigans between my least fave pairing, so I’ll take it!
2022-12-311h 19Romancing Nancy DrewDigest 110: The Nutcracker Ballet Mystery!Ned is absolutely AWOL for this one, the story of a ballet school owner beset by annoyance and frustration while trying to put together the yearly Nutcracker performance. Nancy joins the fracas as propmistress slash sassmistress to help figure out who seems to be sabotaging the show. I blame L. Ron for all this.
2022-12-2356 minRomancing Nancy DrewWerewolf in a Winter Wonderland!In Digest 175, Nancy, Bess, George, and Ned (Chad Michael Murray) investigate the disappearance of some wolves from a nearby wolf preserve, and strange events at the Hallmark Cinematic Universe Ice Festival, brought to you by Local Ski Shop. As you know, werewolves are not canon, so some poor furry just trying to get by has to be involved. At several points Nancy could have hit up the Sweat Lodge with CMM, but sadly does not. It’s a HOWL-ing good time (*NO) for all! Or none. Or furries.
2022-12-161h 15Romancing Nancy Drew12x06: SuperMystery 2: A Crime For ChristmasThis club (literally) has it all (Christmas)! Nancy and Bess are in NYC to help the Hardys (played by whichever male lead from Friends you hate most, and Justin Timberlake) catch a pair of cat burglars. Bess meets the man of her dreams (played by any member of New Kids On the Block) and all of them are soon clubbing and ice skating and getting kidnapped and stealing forklifts. It’s a lot. Happy holidays to all, and to all a horse drawn carriage ride that doesn’t end at gunpoint!
2022-11-251h 37Romancing Nancy Drew12x05: Files 30: Death By DesignA LEGIT BANGER. Nancy and Bess head to Chicago to find out who is threatening hot teen-fashion designer Kim Daley (Fairuza Balk). Everyone hates her, so the suspect list is long—and then Nancy discovers she has been poisoned and has 72 hours from the exposure to live. She calls in Ned and they go full Jack Bauer on everything, because they have some hot celebratory banging to do. Keanu Reeves and Neve Campbell also star, LOL.
2022-11-191h 07Romancing Nancy Drew12x04: Files 29: Pure Poison!In which Nancy receives an emergency call to Washington to save Senator Kirkpatrick (Sigourney Weaver) from the repercussions of Files 7. The senator isn’t being blackmailed; she’s being threatened with exposure over one slightly sketch decision she made to help Teresa the tennis star, and TMZ has receipts. If Nancy can’t block the story, the senator’s career and Teresa’s life might be over. Nancy has a very exciting scavenger hunt and gets to see two corpses, because this is that kind of book.
2022-11-111h 04Romancing Nancy Drew12x03: Files 28: The Black Widow!!!In which Carson falls for a sexy older* lady! (*Older than Nancy, which is a relief!) Nancy and Carson are taking a cruise to Rio for Carnival and to catch up with one of Carson’s old friends when they run into the widow in question (Isabella Rossellini, an absolute smoke show). Nancy is enduring the thoroughly unwelcome attentions of the assistant cruise director slash part time exotic dancer and trying to find out who is threatening the sexy widow and Nancy herself. Ned shows up to be the hero we both deserve AND need. It’s delightful. (Also, always use...
2022-11-0558 minRomancing Nancy Drew12x02: Files 27: Most Likely to Die!The superlative no one wants!!! The Notorious NBG plus Ned is invited to a high school reunion hosted by the head cheerleader, which kicks off a string of robberies/mean-spirited pranks. Nancy investigates and nearly gets infected with typhus. She’s Final Girl-ing it!!! I love to see it!
2022-10-281h 14Romancing Nancy Drew12x01: Files 26: Playing With FireIn which Nancy helps Richard Branson get out of an Ocean’s Eleven setup. A handsome movie-studio heir was storing a Napoleon miniature in Branson’s hotel vault when it went up in flames! Nancy has to find the perp and avoid bad hotel publicity. With cameos from a college professor cat lady who lives on a houseboat and a rugged lumberjack with the improbable name Chad, to a legit sheik (not Duncan!!!), this club has it all, including a LITERAL dumpster fire.
2022-10-2251 minRomancing Nancy Drew11x05: Mystery Stories 40: Moonstone Castle Mystery!In which Nancy falls into an absolute hot mess involving Steve Buscemi, John Slattery, and Bea Arthur. 15 years ago, a toddler vanished when her grandmother died; the other set of grandparents is back from a busy schedule of savin’ foreign souls and bein’ captives. Nancy and her friends explore a decrepit castle and survive a boat crash, and elude several iterations of Steve Buscemi (and enemy of the show L. Ron Hubbard!). It’s a weird, weird time!
2022-10-1455 minRomancing Nancy Drew11x04: Mystery Stories 39: Clue of the Dancing PuppetIn which Nancy stumbles onto the creepiest Real Doll sitch possible. Carson’s client, an actor who is directing plays for River Heights’s amateur acting troupe, has been seeing a dancing puppet near their venue. Nancy weathers several concussions to power through and play Scarlett O’Hara in their current production while investigating the creepy puppetry. Ned makes the most of his tiny cameo and it’s adorable. Get ready to lob some cannonballs and/or roses at America’s favorite teen sleuth!
2022-09-301h 19Romancing Nancy Drew11x03: Mystery Stories 38: Mystery of the Fire Dragon!In which, well, there’s some yellowface. The Notorious NBG head to NYC, where Nancy is actually the Commissioner of All Police, to investigate the disappearance of a young Chinese exchange student. George poses as said student and it’s real cringe. Nancy gets murdered via flowerpot and walks it off, heads off an airplane bombing, and meets up with Ned in Hong Kong, where HE is an exchange student! Also, Ned got Nancy her own room for sexy roleplay reasons. Anyway, Nancy is the master of air heists and smuggling, and wins the day.
2022-09-231h 00Romancing Nancy Drew11x02: Mystery Stories 37: Clue in the Old StagecoachIn which Nancy single-handedly funds a school! An old lady asks Nancy’s help in finding a treasure hidden by her great-uncle 100 years earlier, which could be sold to finance said school to benefit the town. Nancy tangles with a local xenophobe and a pair of con artists, and dates a guy who is possibly Ned wearing a mustache, if my theory is correct. Also, old-timey photos may or may not have been taken, because stagecoach, y’all!!!
2022-09-121h 03Romancing Nancy Drew11x01: Mystery Stories 36: The Secret of the Golden PavilionIn which Nancy’s entire extended entourage visits the newest addition to the United States, Hawaii! Skin diving! Luaus! Volcanoes! Dumbest gang names ever! This club has it all!!!
2022-09-0559 minRomancing Nancy Drew10x06: SuperMystery 1: Double CrossingIn which Nancy boards the Freewinds and sets sail for danger! Frank and Joe are undercover and Nancy overhears two people plotting to sell CIA secrets. Nancy finds a scorpion in her bed (which is not a euphemism for Frank)! A vampire mask is worn! Horrible decisions all around!
2022-08-051h 10Romancing Nancy Drew10x05: Files 25: Rich and DangerousIn which Nancy solves TWO murders after seeing the corpses! Nancy meets a rich widow and her entourage, who are staying next door at the Plaza Hotel, and the widow, who feels she’s in danger, dies in Nancy’s arms. It’s pretty bad. The house detective immediately suspects her, and Nancy has to clear her name, even though she basically treats the detective like a pesky gnat, which is hilarious. Nancy also has a Peaches and Cream Barbie phase, which I’m absolutely here for.
2022-07-301h 06Romancing Nancy Drew10x04: Files 24: Till Death Do Us Part!!!NED PROPOSES TO NANCY!!! Because it’s sweeps week! Ned’s home for summer break and Nancy doesn’t understand why he’s been ghosting her… and then he asks her to marry him. Nancy’s evil twin then announces that SHE is marrying Ned, in a shocking twist!!! My fix-it fic: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1736789
2022-07-221h 22Romancing Nancy Drew10x03: Files 23: Sinister ParadiseNancy, Ned, Bess, and George head to Hawaii to find a missing 16-year-old girl and, in the process, are nearly killed in an engineered car crash, exploded, and thrown into a legit volcano! Nancy’s getting all hard-boiled up in here, y’all!
2022-07-011h 12Romancing Nancy Drew10x02: Files 22: Fatal AttractionIn which Nancy stumbles into a Regency-era extortion racket. Ned is super cute in this one, and they have hurt/comfort scenes! Also, a barn literally burns down. It’s all you’ve ever wanted, and more! (Is Felix a vampire, or just an aspiring pimp? Also food for thought.)
2022-06-271h 02Romancing Nancy Drew11x01: Files 21: Recipe for Murder!After Ned sets fire to the barbecue, spoiling his domestic-goddess cottagecore phase, he and Nancy drag Bess and George to a fancy French cooking school, where the head chef collapses during orientation and Nancy and Ned’s teacher, the lead singer of Nine Inch Nails, is discovered as a corpse-sickle in the walk-in. It’s up to the Fab Four to stop a dangerous killer, while occasionally breaking for moonlit walks and van abductions. Pepe Le Pew also guest-stars.
2022-06-1750 minRomancing Nancy Drew10x05: Mystery Stories 35: The Haunted Showboat!Nancy’s hitting up Mardi Gras, y’all! Our fave sleuth (who just smiles and agrees when Bess calls her “the best sleuth,” which is such a weird word) heads to NOLA to both grab some beads AND snatch some sheets off some super casual ghosts. Ned pops up near the end and manages to get some tackling in, which he needs anyway. Many moonlight boat rides and even more casual racism! Welcome to flavor country!
2022-06-101h 10Romancing Nancy Drew10x04: Mystery Stories 34: The Hidden Window MysteryOh man. Nancy searches for a lost stained glass window, she and her cousin are menaced by Uncle Fester, and peacocks. So many peacocks. Also: any mail carrier who enters Nancy’s house is forfeiting retirement.
2022-06-0352 minRomancing Nancy Drew10x03: Mystery Stories 33: Witch Tree SymbolIn which Nancy is accused repeatedly of being A WITCH! Nancy agrees to recover some stolen antique furniture, including some sweet George Washington-adjacent ones, and along with Bess and George tries to find a runaway Amish girl. Quilting, barn dances, giant muddy pits of doom, a small boy with a slingshot! This club’s got it all!!!
2022-05-271h 25Romancing Nancy Drew10x02: Mystery Stories 32: Scarlet Slipper MysteryIn which NANCY AND NED ARE MISTAKEN FOR AN ENGAGED COUPLE. My screaming lasts several minutes. Nancy is helping the Fontaines, a brother and sister who are refugees from Europe. They have been warned to leave town, OR ELSE. Nancy and her friends and future mother in law take over the siblings’ dancing school. Ned pretends he and Nancy are married. A farmhouse burns down. You know, normal things.
2022-05-201h 37Romancing Nancy Drew10x01: Mystery Stories 31: The Ringmaster’s SecretIn which real life Disney Princess and friend to all animals Nancy Drew is given a mysterious horse-charm bracelet and decides to track down the destitute previous owner, gets choked out during a date with Ned (get your mind out of the gutter!), and trick rides horses like an absolute rock star. Also starring a Chekhov’s lion and L. Ron Hubbard, natch.
2022-05-131h 21Romancing Nancy Drew9x05: Files 20: Very Deadly YoursNed gets hit by a car!!!! It happens when he’s coming to visit Nancy on a case, so she feels absolutely horrible about it. Nancy is investigating a disturbing event: Bess answered a personal ad and the guy she met was creepy and threatened her. Nancy heads to the newspaper office to see if she can discover the identity of the guy who threatened Bess. So much hurt/comfort potential!!!!
2022-05-061h 08Romancing Nancy Drew9x04: Files 19: Sisters in Crime!Nancy heads to San Diego in February, at the behest of a high school classmate, Susan, whose roommate just died under unusual circumstances. The roommate had confessed that she knew a “dangerous” secret, and Susan thinks she was killed. Along the way, Nancy stays faithful to her man despite being away from him for Valentine’s Day and gets the absolute daylights beaten out of her, cause people are just sometimes pimp slapped on public California beaches, y’all. Get ready for sorority intrigue, fraternity rings, and some veiled same-sex crushes!
2022-04-2958 minRomancing Nancy Drew9x03: Files 18: Circle of Evil!Nancy investigates a string of burglaries around town that seem to be connected to the River Heights Country Club. She’s tossed into (and almost drowned in) the pool! It’s July 4, y’all, and Ned’s here so there are plenty of fireworks (mostly literal, sadly!). Also, the newest detective in the RHPD is unconvinced of Nancy’s awesomeness, so you know he’s gonna be disabused of that real quick.
2022-04-2246 minRomancing Nancy Drew9x02: Files 17: Stay Tuned for Danger!Nancy and Bess take a “vacation” to New York to see Aunt Eloise and sightsee, and… get entangled in a mystery. The lead actor of a popular soap has been receiving threats, around the same time that he was offered and accepted a film contract. Is he also totally hot for Bess? Incredibly. Be ready for some body shaming and mental health problematics, y’all!
2022-04-1558 minRomancing Nancy Drew9x01: Files 16: Never Say DieGeorge wants more than anything to win the World Junior (Frosty) Champion crown! Or sash, or maybe scepter. She’s in a bike race being held near River Heights, but has been threatened and victim of several suspicious “accidents.” Meanwhile, Bill Gates discovers the code for Clippy has been stolen! While on this case, Nancy tangles with a killer shark (literally) but more importantly, NED SWEEPS HER INTO HIS ARMS AND RUNS AWAY FROM A FIRE WITH HER. Solid 10/10, no notes.
2022-04-0856 minRomancing Nancy Drew8x05: Mystery Stories 30: Clue of the Velvet MaskNed is described as Nancy’s “occasional” date in this one, which I forgive only thanks to some cheek kissing. Nancy is on the trail of a gang of clever house thieves who strike during parties held by rich people, which would have been fine if they had just been redistributing that wealth, y’all. George poses as Nancy and is kidnapped and has PTSD as a result! Also, there’s a French maid costume, which you know Ned is 100% here for. Come celebrate 20 years of Nancy and Ned’s longing glances slash the longest college career on record!
2022-04-011h 05Romancing Nancy Drew8x04: Mystery Stories 29: Mystery at the Ski JumpThis is better described as “Mystery of the Mink Hoodwink.” Nancy, after nearly getting taken out by a rogue car, discovers that a mysterious Mrs. Channing has been selling local ladies sweet furs and worthless stock certificates. Then she finds that they’re posing as her! She’s also tapped to help her dad solve a case in Montreal, and they meet a trapper who looks like someone who couldn’t decide between cosplaying as Daniel Boone or Santa. Grab the boys and head to the Adirondacks, it’s villain catching time!
2022-03-251h 23Romancing Nancy Drew8x03: Mystery Stories 28: Clue of the Black KeysNancy meets up with a himbo archaeologist (Bradley Cooper) who is searching for two things: a missing colleague and a priceless, possibly terrible, treasure. She also attends a dinner party at Ned’s frat, saves said himbo from a starvation death, and endures the dreaded TORTURE BRACELET. (It’s a standard bracelet, plus, y’know, evil.) Academic petty squabbles ahoy! Come get lost in the Florida keys!
2022-03-1853 minRomancing Nancy Drew8x02: Mystery Stories 27: The Secret of the Wooden LadyCarson Drew (Jon Hamm) is called to Boston to help his old buddy Captain Easterly, who wants to buy a boat. Said boat is being searched regularly for something, so Nancy comes along to check that out. Bess, George, Ned, Burt, and Dave join in. Nancy and Ned, who are clearly married now, visit a tattoo parlor and save the boat from a bad storm. A good time is had by all! Except when the Vulcan neck pinches are happening.
2022-03-041h 18Romancing Nancy Drew8x01: Mystery Stories 26: Clue of the Leaning ChimneyNancy is investigating two mysteries: missing pottery, and a missing father and daughter. Both the pottery and the relatives are Chinese, and signs point to the clue of a leaning chimney near a pit of very special clay. Very important: Nancy and Ned attend a wedding! (Are they secretly married and is Ned investigating some complicated mystery at Emerson? Why not???)
2022-02-2554 minRomancing Nancy Drew7x05: Files 15: Trial By Fire!Carson Drew (Jon Hamm, inventor of toaster strudel) is charged with bribing a judge to save his newspaper client reporter from revealing her source. Nancy springs into action! There’s actual murder in this one, y’all!
2022-02-041h 04Romancing Nancy Drew7x04: Files 14: This Side of EVILThis club has it all! Nancy and Ned (and George) sharing an apartment! A horse-drawn carriage ride! Ned doing science experiments! Many tender interrupted moments! Ned plucking his lady from danger with what amounts to a claw machine! A helicopter blowing up! A dramatic villain confrontation! Soooo much drama!
2022-01-281h 03Romancing Nancy Drew7x03: Files 13: Wings of Fear!Nancy’s longtime* friend Jennifer wakes Nancy with an urgent midnight call: her coworker has been murdered and was probably part of a smuggling operation! (*Legit never mentioned before or since.) Nancy and Bess hop the next flight to Seattle and get right to work: Nancy investigating and Bess going through what seems to be legit lightning-fast flight attendant school. There are trash bags of sweaty coeds! Nancy wears glitter in her hair as a disguise! A plane blows up! This is a hot Hobby Lobby mess, but all is right in the end, as Nancy departs for “the arms of t...
2022-01-2146 minRomancing Nancy Drew7x02: Files 12: Fatal RansomIn which Nancy investigates her second kidnapping in a row! This one involves spoiled rich orphan Hal and his uncle-guardian Lance, who drives a Maserati. Hal vanishes, Lance finds a ransom note, and Nancy’s on the case! George goes undercover as a punk and the word “hell” is actually spoken (by a villain, natch!). Ned makes a special cameo appearance. Bloody car interiors and skeleton decorations all around!
2022-01-1453 minRomancing Nancy Drew7x01: Files 11: Heart of DangerIn which Nancy investigates a ransom case… involving a girl who vanished 15 years earlier. Nancy reluctantly leaves Ned to head to Texas for her investigation, and he follows at the first excuse because he is her guy and Texas ranches are a lot, y’all. Also starring Anna Nicole Smith, the KFC guy, and a rodeo clown. Plus kangaroos! This club truly has it all!
2022-01-0757 minRomancing Nancy Drew6x05: Mystery Stories: Ghost of Blackwood HallIn which my OTP is stuck in legit quicksand! In this season finale, Nancy takes on the case of a recently widowed woman whose late husband’s “spirit” is leading her to make bad financial and practical decisions. The Notorious NBG run into a spirit photographer in New Orleans, and the Church of Scientology (it’s not, but it kinda is?). Ned tries to get all romantic during a moonlit boat ride. Our boy has plans for his girl, y’all.
2021-12-311h 07Romancing Nancy Drew6x04: Mystery Stories: Clue in the Old AlbumNancy and casual racism! Nancy chases a pickpocket and manages to land in a case involving a bereaved outmatched grandma with a raging doll-collecting habit, a preteen going full Jon-Benet whenever possible, and a mysterious violinist. Ned also admits that he has a vision board and he has Nancy’s photo on the bride pic in that vision board, y’all. Say yes to that dress, and a merry Christmas to all!
2021-12-241h 11Romancing Nancy Drew6x03: Mystery Stories: Tolling BellIn which Ned returns from the war and he and Nancy ALMOST ELOPE (not really, you’ll see). Nancy is investigating a swindling scheme and a cave, purportedly haunted, in which a bell tolls to warn trespassers away from the rapidly rising water. Carson is kidnapped, and recovered, and Nancy feels like she’s in several wildly different Twilight Zone episodes. You know, the usual.
2021-12-171h 09Romancing Nancy Drew6x02: Mystery Stories: Clue in the Crumbling WallIn which Nancy and a ladycop may or may not have a mutual respect girlcrush on each other??? Nancy takes the case of the missing dancer to help a poor waif plant-snatching orphan and her prematurely stress-aged mom, since the missing dancer (who is said waif’s aunt) will receive a massive inheritance if she shows up to claim it in the next 3 weeks, and said inheritance includes a nearby abandoned castle! Shenanigans ensue, as always, and Ned is in South America (my headcanon is that he’s doing some light Nazi hunting).
2021-12-031h 09Romancing Nancy Drew6x01: Mystery Stories: Secret in the Old AtticOMG NED INVITES SOMEONE ELSE TO A DANCE. (It’s not what you think.) Nancy is tasked with recovering some lost music and a stolen scientific formula. She is SUPER DISTRACTED that her soul mate hasn’t invited her to the next Emerson dance. The absolute MOST DRAMATIC climax scene in all of literature plays out. Also: Bushy Trott. Let It Be Me (Epilogue) link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/657784/chapters/1199066 . Follow me on Twitter: @RomancingNancy or @ndnickerson.
2021-11-261h 00Romancing Nancy Drew5x05.3: Someone Else’s Arms part 3Nancy and Ned make their decision official, in pretty much every way. And they finally take That Step! Then they decide to let other people in on it. Story: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2435945?view_full_work=true . Follow me on Twitter: @RomancingNancy or @ndnickerson .
2021-11-1442 minRomancing Nancy Drew5x05.2: Someone Else’s Arms part 2Picking up from the last episode: Nancy and Ned take their Bahamas trip for spring break and discuss what their future might hold, especially given the timing of the night in question. Once Ned returns to Emerson, Nancy visits him, and the most fateful question is answered. Follow me on Twitter: @RomancingNancy or @ndnickerson.
2021-11-1252 minRomancing Nancy Drew5x05.1: Someone Else’s Arms part 1In which the alternate universe of Rain on a Tin Roof is realized. Nancy chooses between Ned and Frank, but the one she rejects can’t handle it. This episode includes non explicit references to sexual assault, so please skip if that content might upset you. Story link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2435945?view_full_work=true . Follow me on Twitter: @RomancingNancy or @ndnickerson.
2021-11-0553 minRomancing Nancy Drew5x04: LettersIn which Ned goes off to fight Nazis, and Nancy realizes that she loves him. It’s World War II, y’all! Story: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1012069 . Follow me on Twitter: @RomancingNancy or @ndnickerson.
2021-10-2943 minRomancing Nancy Drew5x03: Nothing Else But ThisNancy reappears in Ned’s life after breaking up with him 18 months earlier, during the On Campus series, and they slowly rebuild a relationship.
2021-10-2243 minRomancing Nancy Drew5x02: Rain on a Tin RoofIn this fanfic episode, Nancy chooses between Ned and Frank… and we all know which way she will go. Story: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31631 . Follow me on Twitter @RomancingNancy / @ndnickerson .
2021-10-1557 minRomancing Nancy Drew5x1.5: Jealous/PossessThis one is background for 5x02, among others, and tells the story of Nancy and Ned’s junior and senior proms. One version, anyway. I also had to give a little background on Frank Hardy, sigh. Jealous: https://archiveofourown.org/works/40566 and Possess: https://archiveofourown.org/works/40572 . Follow me on Twitter: @RomancingNancy / @ndnickerson .
2021-10-1320 minRomancing Nancy DrewTall, Dark and DangerousIn the first fanfic episode: Nancy investigates a murder at her father’s request, and one of the suspects is Ned Nickerson, a handsome as sin billionaire who starts falling for her at first sight. Story link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/738227?view_full_work=true. Follow me on Twitter at @RomancingNancy / @ndnickerson.
2021-10-0853 minRomancing Nancy DrewBuried SecretsIn which Nancy is the Democratic National Convention offices! Nancy and Ned are tentatively back together, just hangin’, when a local political candidate is nearly shot. Nancy saves him; then Brenda challenges her to a “detectives’ duel”: to solve the mystery of the candidate’s father’s death 30 years earlier. Nancy, of course, can’t turn that down, even though it promises to cut into makin’ out time. Also featured: car chases, mysterious lanky guy with a shotgun, and a very convenient dumbwaiter. Find me on Twitter: @RomancingNancy and @ndnickerson.
2021-10-011h 25Romancing Nancy DrewFalse MovesIn which Ned has the absolute GALL to beg Nancy to clear his new girlfriend’s name after she’s named suspect in a jewel theft. As mysteries (and Ned) are catnip to Nancy, she swallows her infinite hatred for her guy’s new flame and gets to work. Nancy’s new boyfriend, a Labrador retriever with a bow tie, can’t hold a candle to Ned. Is there some banging during an inadvertent lock-in? Maybe! (No.) Also, all that football practice pays off, y’all!
2021-09-241h 06Romancing Nancy DrewTwo Points to Murder (My Heart)OMG. This begins the three-book arc of Nancy and Ned’s breakup, which always totally destroys me. WHY CAN’T MY PRECIOUS BABIES BE HAPPY. Nancy goes to Emerson to investigate a series of mean-spirited “practical jokes” that are throwing off the basketball team (Ned’s the co-captain), which is three games away from heading to the NCAA playoffs? Apparently? There’s so much angst in this one. SO. MUCH. My heart!!! (Also, the inaugural appearance of the Big Nick.)
2021-09-171h 05Romancing Nancy DrewDeadly Doubles!The Notorious NBG head to Washington, DC to watch tennis and thwart international terrorism plots, which is what all teenagers do on vacation. Ned is referred to as Nancy’s “main man in any language,” which delights me to no end. Yes, a corpse is discovered in a parking deck. Yes, refugees are granted asylum. No silver loving cups were bestowed in this one, sadly.
2021-09-1044 minRomancing Nancy DrewWhite Water Terror!!!If you’ve ever wanted to see Ned as the best protective boyfriend EVER, this will be your new jam. The Notorious NBG (Nancy, Bess, and George) drag Ned to Montana for a white water rafting trip George won. Then it turns into a slasher movie, and they’re lost in the woods, trying to figure out who’s after them before they end up haunting the place. Cameo by an enormous boulder whose sole interest is Nancy and Ned having post-life-threatening-event sex. Follow me on Twitter at @RomancingNancy or @ndnickerson!
2021-09-0357 minRomancing Nancy DrewQuest of the Missing MapNancy scores her first, by no means last, Emerson dance crown in this one, and is kidnapped twice. Just a bunch of kidnapping in this one, y’all. Nancy takes Ned on a gay treasure hunt (phrasing!) and finds, as always, that the treasure was Ned all along. That, and never trust anyone under the age of 10.
2021-08-201h 00Romancing Nancy DrewMystery at the Moss-Covered MansionIn which the Nancy Drew Literary Universe continues to argue in favor of a robust social safety net. Carson’s searching for an heiress and Nancy CANNOT stay away from a creepy abandoned-looking mansion in the woods, where she and the girls keep hearing screams and gunshots. Ned, who is on retainer at Carson’s firm to run any errand where he might see Nancy, has a cute visit. Nancy also should have died like easily three times and even respawns at one point. Visit me on Twitter at @RomancingNancy and @ndnickerson!
2021-08-1354 minRomancing Nancy DrewMystery of the Brass Bound Trunk(s)Nancy plans a trip to South America while her dad is… working a mob case??? She may or may not be struck by lightning, which only makes her stronger. Ned stows away on the midnight train to bangtown! Find me on Twitter at @RomancingNancy and @ndnickerson.
2021-08-061h 02Romancing Nancy DrewClue of the Tapping HeelsIn which Nancy is kidnapped (kidnaped, in the text) but just once but TWICE, escapes an exploding steamboat, and sleeps it off in the back of a paddy wagon. She is a girl on the go, y’all. Find me on Twitter at @ndnickerson and @RomancingNancy!
2021-07-301h 37Romancing Nancy DrewHit and Run HolidayWhile Ned is just a passing reference in this one, I still wanted to cover it for the interesting social commentary. Nancy is on spring break in Florida with Bess and George and checks in on a friend, who is run down in the street; Nancy decides to solve the case, natch. Bonus points for the most 80s windsurfing adventure you can imagine, Nancy’s Walkman, and discos galore!
2021-07-231h 03Romancing Nancy DrewSmile and Say MurderIn which Nancy takes an intern job at a magazine that is definitely not run by Miranda Priestly, and Ned shows up to help out. Nancy gives him a job to do and then behaves like an emotionally compromised 12 year old when he does. Also, a tarantula becomes collateral damage, and the Hardys are established as fictional in this universe! Hooray!
2021-07-1653 minRomancing Nancy DrewMurder on IceIn which Nancy is snowed in near the Overlook Hotel! Thankfully, not THAT Overlook Hotel. Nancy and Ned both manage to get banged up, which shoulda led to some bangin’. Also, I refer to a character as Jean-Luc (I know, it does actually make sense in context). Fic rec for this one (it’s explicit, read responsibly): https://archiveofourown.org/works/657255 .
2021-07-091h 03Romancing Nancy DrewDeadly IntentNancy, Bess, and George head to the Big Apple, and Nancy sustains her first of infinite concussions for this series. Ned pretends Emerson's having a three-day weekend so he can come hang out with his girl. Nancy practices some karate moves. You know, the usual.
2021-07-0257 minRomancing Nancy DrewSecrets Can KillIn which Nancy investigates some random crimes at a high school, and then stuff gets real, y’all. Also, I hate Daryl Gray.
2021-06-2556 minRomancing Nancy DrewNancy Drew Files!!!Background info about the Files series (plus some shade directed at other ND properties) and how it differs from the Mystery Stories. Also, why I blanking LOVE IT.
2021-06-2320 minRomancing Nancy DrewThe Mystery of the Haunted BridgeIn which Nancy tangles with a pick-up artist and reunites an orphan with her (said orphan’s) former fiancé. Ned shows up to gallantly help collect clues rather than dance with his girl, and Nancy reigns supreme at all organized sports.
2021-06-1858 minRomancing Nancy DrewMystery of the Ivory CharmIn which Nancy out-white-saviors a white savior. She quasi-adopts an abused Indian boy (holy racist stereotypes, Batman!) and tries to solve the mystery of the Creepy Acrobat Shell-House. Ned doesn’t get to punch anyone, but he does threaten to. Dancing! Mysterious resurrections! Eating chocolate cake with one’s bare hands!
2021-06-111h 16Romancing Nancy DrewThe Password to Larkspur LaneNancy burns down Shady Pines!!! She doesn’t, but she tries. In this one, Nancy rescues an injured carrier pigeon and an elderly lady, and Ned gets to arrive at the critical moment with guns a-blazin’.
2021-06-041h 04Romancing Nancy DrewNancy’s Mysterious LetterIn which Nancy tracks down a mail thief AND an heiress, because she’s cool like that, and NED WINS THE BIG GAME Y’ALL.
2021-05-2855 minRomancing Nancy DrewThe Clue in the DiaryNancy and Ned’s explosive meet-cute in 1932! Ned wrenches off a bumper and does some very sweet stalking to prove his viability for the coveted role of “Nancy’s special friend.”
2021-05-2057 minRomancing Nancy DrewNancy before NedWho is Nancy Drew? This ep gives background on the version of Nancy we’ll be starting with: 1932 Mystery Stories Nancy in all her awesomeness.
2021-05-1920 min