Shows
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayThe ND Lovers Club-How ND Women Lust, Like and Love-Bontle Senne & Sara-Louise AckrillDuring this episode, with authors Bontle Senne and Sara-Louise Ackrill we talk about their new book "The ND Lovers Club-How Women Lust, Like and Love" and I hope all of you will buy this book today!Bontle is an AuDHD speaker, sex and ADHD coach and global transformation leader. Sara-Louise is a renowned neurodiversity specialist therapist and coach, professional speaker, and social entrepreneur. Together, they share so much valuable information that we all need to understand if we are ND women, or want to build a relationship with an ND woman. Some of the...2025-06-1058 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayRelationship Counseling with Neurodiverse Couples: What Needs to Change?-Tony Attwood & Maxine AstonIn 2017, when I discovered I was in a neurodiverse marriage I bought every book on neurodiverse relationships by Maxine Aston and several of Tony Attwood's books. Each of the books I read made me feel less alone and helped me understand that after 29 years of marriage my journey to understanding was just beginning. In 2020, when I started the Neurodiverse Love podcast I reached out to Maxine to let her know how much her books helped me and I invited her to meet with me to talk about joining me as a guest on the podcast. Maxine graciously...2025-06-0345 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayThree Things That Happy Neurodiverse Couples Do-Eva A. MendesDuring this episode with therapist and coach Eva A. Mendes she shares some of the important information neurodiverse couples shared with her for her newest book titled: “Armchair Conversations on Love and Autism: Secrets of Happy Neurodiverse Couples”.Some of the important things that top performing neurodiverse couples do:Accept the diagnosis and talk openly about each partner’s neurotypes. Work together to understand the root cause of their challenges as a couple.Have a beginners mindset as an individual and a couple.Trust each other and be able to be influenced by their par...2025-05-1355 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayConnection Between Trauma and Neurodivergence and Expanding the Idea of Love-Jarral BoydDuring this episode with neurodivergent counselor Jarral Boyd we address the connection between trauma and neurodivergence and ways to think about romantic love as well as the following: Navigating neurodivergence and trauma Understanding your emotional vocabulary. Addressing challenges through somatics and getting to know your body and acknowledge what is going on.Creating a routine can be helpful to better understand your body and emotions and help you get more in tune.Understand how to experience joy in your body.Translating what’s happening in your body when you have alexithymia.Information shared through AANE certification includes using a 1-5 scale to shar...2025-05-0654 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayUnderstanding AuDHD and Executive Function Challenges in Neurodiverse Relationships-Robin TateIf you did not have a chance to join us live for the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference you can still get "lifetime access" to the video recordings of the 31 amazing sessions and the 4 Q&A panels. In addition, you will also get the FREE BONUSES (Neurodiverse Love Conversaton Cards & Workbook and lifetime access to the 27 sessions from the 2023 Neurodiverse Love Conference). Click here to learn more about the conference sessions and to buy access to the conference videos today.____________________________________________________________During this episode with returning guest and relationship and life coach, Robin Tate we talk...2025-03-2552 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayBridging the Gap: Advancing Awareness and Understanding of Neurodiverse Relationships-Bronwyn WilsonTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
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Dr. Bronwyn Wilson provides information on some of the significant discoveries that she made during her research. She reveals how different needs for interaction between two groups of people in neurodiverse relationships creates an unconventional relationship which introduces unique challenges for the people involved. She describes how these different needs and resulting challenges are linked to the development of an ongoing dynamic sys...2024-11-2630 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayNegotiating Sex in a Neurodiverse Relationship-Lawrence SiegelTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.____________________________________________
Neurodiverse relationships can sometimes be difficult to navigate, but if we have clear ways to both communicate and understand each other, it can be easier and more gratifying. During this episode, Lawrence Siegel, MA, CSE explores some of the things we can do to communicate more effectively about our sexual and intimate needs. Things like understanding nonverbal expression and creating shared experiences of phy...2024-11-1933 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayAdventures in Neurodiverse Parenting-Kate and Clark WebbTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
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Do you feel like your struggling to navigate parenting children while also being a neurodiverse couple? Kate and Clark Webb certainly do! This episode will highlight common daily parenting struggles from both the neurodivergent and neurotypical sides. Clark and Kate explore different scenarios, how each responds, and reflect on what they could have done differently. No parent is perfect, so let's embrace surviving one...2024-11-0528 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayAddressing Sex and Intimacy in Neurodiverse Couple Therapy-Leslie Sickels
To learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
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During this episode, Leslie Sickels, LCSW discusses how intimacy and sex are healthy, natural aspects of human relationships, yet this topic often goes unaddressed in neurodiverse couples therapy. While difficulties a nd challenges related to intimate connections are not unique to neurodiverse couples, there are core areas of neurodiversity that frequently arise and can be effectively identified, addressed, and managed in...2024-10-2925 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayLove Languages Through a Neurodiverse Lens-Cheryl RhodesTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love._________________________________________________
During this episode with Cheryl Rhodes, MS, LMFT, LPC you will learn more about the benefit of understanding your love languages. You've heard this term before and know that the love languages describe different ways to express and experience love. Do you know how to determine your personal love language and that of your partner? Are there Autistic or neurodivergent lov...2024-10-1521 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayFriendship Love Autism: Communication Challenges and the Autism Diagnosis That Gave Us a New Life Together-Michelle and Andrew PrestonTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
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During this episode, Michelle and Andrew Preston share the story about how they were struggling in their relationship until Michelle read a chapter in a book that made her realize Andrew may be Autistic. She approached him about and it and they were able to go through the diagnosis process together and learned that Andrew is in fact Autistic. Learning this strengthened their bon...2024-10-0829 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayInterrupting the Defense Cycle: A Nervous System Perspective of Neurodiverse Relationships-Heather ParksTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
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During this episode Heather Parks busts one of the many myths that exist about neurodiverse relationships-the belief that "things will only get better if my partner changes". When we put all the responsibility for change on our partner, we can feel powerless, stuck and frustrated. But the great news is that there's a different way to create change in a relationship! And...2024-10-0124 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayThinking Outside the Box: Tools for Effective Neurodiverse Communication-Sarah and Larry NanneryTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
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During this episode Sarah (Autistic) and Larry (NT) share some of the most useful strategies they have developed for communicating and thriving together as partners, as lovers, and as parents. These are their most impactful tools for effective neurodiverse communication, which they learned "the hard way" in this journey of making love work together for the past 10+ years.
You will als...2024-09-2424 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayThe Mindset Necessary for a Happy Neurodiverse Marriage-Eva MendesTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
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Eva Mendes is an autism and ADHD specialist, couples counselor, and psychotherapist. She facilitates worshops and training at various universities, mental health and medical centers. Eva has a private practice where she works with clients from all over the world.
During this presentation, Eva talks about the critically important things that can contribute to a happy and healthy relationship. She als...2024-09-0331 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona Kay"Tell Me Farm Facts..."and Other Sexual Strategies for Neurodiverse Relationships-Kathy McMahonTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
When sex is an issue in a neurodiverse relationship, it often happens for both common and less common reasons. While sex can be a relationship strength and a reliable source of comfort and connection for neurodiverse relationships, when it's not, understanding why can sometimes be a challenge. In this episode, Dr. Kathy McMahon addresses both universal and neurodiverse specific sexual challeges in...2024-08-2037 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayWhat Successful Neurodiverse Couples Know and Do: Key Ingredients-Stephanie and Dan HolmesTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
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The topics addressed during this episode are:
The challenge of discerning "wanting to" vs "wanting to want to". The former leads to action, the latter doesn't go anywhere.
How to present what's verbally expressed as "important" compared to the actions that "show" what's important.
What are the challenges or expectations for the NT partners to know?
What is a challenge or...2024-08-0629 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayReactivity in Neurodiverse Relationships-Jill CorvelliTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
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Reactivity wreaks havoc in Neurodiverse partnerships. It is implicated in the breakdown of connection, communication and skillful conflict and gets in the way of efforts to recover despite both partner's desires and intentions. Jill discusses the role of reactivity and pathways to change your relationship with it.
You can learn more about Jill's work at:
www.jillcorvelli.com or www.ndp...2024-07-3047 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayLook Under the Hood of a Neurodiverse Relationship Using IFS-Kim BollingTo learn more about the Neurodivere Love Conversation Cards and Workbook, the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos and the other resources available for individuals or couples in mixed neurotype relationships, check out Neurodiverse Love.
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Through the lens of neurodiversity, a movement to de-pathologize atypical neurological wiring, we will look at the application of IFS (Internal Family Systems therapy) to working with mixed neurology couples-effectively "looking under the hood" of what is happening for couples when they don't get along. A case example is discussed.
You can contact Kim at: www.kimbolling.com2024-07-1621 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayTrauma Informed Neurodiverse Couples Therapy-Harry MotroTo understand yourself, your partner and your neurodiverse relationship better, invest in the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards, Workbook, and the Neurodiverse Love Conference videos. In addition, check out the other resources available to help you find guidance as you move forward on your Neurodiverse Love journey. ———————————————————————During this session from the Neurodiverse Love Conference, Dr. Harry Motro shares how "Trauma Informed Neurodiverse Couples Therapy" can help create a path to lasting healing.
When one or both partners has been traumatized by relationship patterns that are rooted in their neuro-differences, the partners must overcome two distinct challenges:
1. Heal the traum...2024-06-0421 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayLove & Marriage, Trauma, Healing and Coaching-Jill KearnsYou can buy the downloadable digital version of the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards (ONLY $11) or the Workbook (ONLY $12.97) at www.neurodiverselove.com
If you would like to purchase the "Strategies & Tools for Increasing Healthy & Respectful Communication" workshop with Greg Fuqua, LMHC and Mona Kay, MSW. Ph.D. click here. The recording and the workshop workbook are available for ONLY $97. In addition, you will receive a discount code to purchase the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards and Workbook for ONLY $1 for each
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During this episode, AANE Certified Neurodiverse Couples Counselor and Coach, Jill Kearns shares some of the lessons she learned and...2024-03-191h 17Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayChallenges and Strengths of Parenting in a Neurodiverse Relationship-Guest Co-host Greg FuquaIf you and your partner are looking for ways to improve your communication in your mixed neurotype relationship, then click here to purchase the recorded workshop with Greg Fuqua and Mona Kay titled:
"Strategies and Tools for Increasing Healthy and Respectful Communication in Your Neurodiverse Relationship".
The topics that are addressed include:
1) Rituals of Communication.
2) Healthy Communication Structures.
3) Reciprocity and Turn Taking.
4) Perspective Taking and Conflict Resolution.
5) Tools for Communicating Changes Wanted and Needed.
The investment for this workshop is ONLY $97 and each participant will receive a Communication Workbook and a code to purchase the digi...2024-03-1251 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayThings to Consider When Traveling as a Neurodiverse CoupleIf you would like to join the "mixed neurotype" support group that I co-facilitate with Jodi Carlton called "Navigating Your Neurodiverse Relationship" you can register at: https://jodicarlton.com/groups/
The cost is ONLY $25 per session and we offer 2 groups (12:30-2PM EST and 6:30-8pm EST) and they both meet on Zoom on the 1st Wednesday of each month.
In addition, if you would like to order the digital version of the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards ($11) or the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Card Workbook ($12.97) go to www.neurodiverselove.com
Thank you for being part of the Neurodiverse Love community!
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2024-01-3019 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayOrion Kelly-That Autistic Guy-Insights About What Makes His Neurodiverse Relationship WorkIf you are interested in attending the mixed neurotype support group that Mona Kay and Jodi Carlton co-facilitate, called "Navigating Your Neurodiverse Relationship" the cost is only $25 per session. We meet monthly on the first Wednesday of the month and we offer 2 groups. One meets at 12:30pm EST and the other meets at 6:30pm EST. You can click here to register for the upcoming group.
In addition, check out Mona's website at: www.neurodiverselove.com if you would like to buy a digital deck of the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards for ONLY $11, or the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Card Workbook for ONLY $12...2024-01-161h 10Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayUnderstanding Loneliness, Relational Needs, and Different Views of a Neurodiverse Marriage with EnochIf you are interested in attending the mixed neurotype support group I co-facilitate with Jodi Carlton, the cost is only $25 per session. We meet monthly on the first Wednesday of the month and we offer 2 groups. One meets at 12:30pm EST and the other at 6:30pm EST. You can click here to register for the upcoming group.
Thank you for being part of the Neurodiverse Love community!
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During this episode, Enoch shares the way he describes the experiences he had and the feelings and emotions he experienced in his 21 year neurodiverse marriage. He shares the word pictures he has created to h...2024-01-091h 06Neurodiverse Love with Mona KaySelf Discovery, Personal Growth, and Discernment-Eva MendesDuring this episode with author, licensed therapist and coach, Eva Mendes, we talk about how our neurodiverse relationships can serve as a mirror to opportunities for self-discovery and personal growth. We also discuss many other important topics including:
Understanding and working on your own issues.
Nature, nurture, family of origin and personality traits.
Aligned values and life goals.
Keeping score isn't healthy. Let things go so they don't build up.
Monitor negative talk about yourself and your partner.
Remembering why you chose your partner and the importance of reconnecting.
Do positive self-talk and create a gratitude list about...2023-12-051h 16Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayResearch on Love, Sex and Relationship Needs of Autistic Adults-Claire Bates and Monique HuysamenDuring this episode Dr. Claire Bates and Dr. Monique Huysamen share some of what they learned from autistic adults about their needs and desires regarding love, sex and intimate relationships.
Some of the topics discussed include:
Information about the project participants and the study purpose.
Understanding consent.
Lack of support regarding information on physical and sexual intimacy.
Awareness of sensory needs and sensitivities.
Sensory joy.
You don't have to share a bed or a house with your intimate partner.
The challenges of neuronormative ways of flirting and dating.
Indirect and ambiguous ways of connecting.
Having frank conversations about needs and...2023-11-211h 02Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayBeing Fearless to Be Yourself & The Attributes of Love-Dennis WyrzykowskiTRIGGER WARNING: DURING THIS EPISODE WE DISCUSS RAPE/SEXUAL ABUSE AND SUICIDE. If any of these issues may be triggering to you then you may want to refrain from listening to this episode, or skip the parts that may be triggering.
Many of us have grown up trying to fit in, be liked, or not understanding the difference between our "intent" and our "impact. In this episode, Dennis Wyrzkowski shares how his trauma, autism diagnosis and focus on love have shaped the person he is today. Dennis spent many years as a monk and is now engaged to be married...2023-10-311h 00Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayWhat Can You Live "With"...or "Without", in Your Neurodiverse Relationship?-Sarah SwensonOn Wednesday, September 13, 2023, from 7:30-9:00pm EST, Mona Kay and Sarah Swenson will be co-facilitating a workshop on Zoom titled: "What Can You Live "With"...or "Without", in Your Neurodiverse Relationship". The cost is $25 per individual or couple.
If you would like to join us for this important workshop, please click here. The workshop will "NOT" be recorded, so participants can discuss the issues that are most important to them. However, if there is enough interest, we may be offer the workshop again.
During this episode with coach and licensed therapist Sarah...2023-08-151h 06Neurodiverse Love with Mona KaySeason 6-Respect, Compassion and Love for Ourselves and Our Partners-with Mona and OlgaWelcome to Season 6 of the Neurodiverse Love podcast. Three years ago, Mona and Olga started this podcast to share their lived experiences in the neurodiverse relationships that they had that had ended. After exploring the ins and outs of the many relationships they have had with neurodivergent men, they share some of the lessons they have learned and ways in which they have grown. They also discuss the importance of respect, compassion and love for yourself and your partner, and how each can make a difference in how we live our lives, become our most authentic selves, and create...2023-08-0930 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayFive Types of Exhaustion and Rest That Can Impact Your Neurodiverse Relationship-Kerry McLeishDuring this episode with Kerry McLeish, you will learn about the 5 types of exhaustion and rest that may be impacting your neurodiverse relationship. You will also understand how to move from exhaustion to a more rested life and learn some ways to create a more healthy rhythm between rest and work.
In addition, you will learn that you can be drained, full or have different capacity depending on what is happening in your life and your relationship. Lastly, stress and exhaustion often go together, so creating a "rest toolbox" that you can turn to whenever you need...2023-07-2556 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayFinding the Goldilocks Zone, Understanding Each Other's Needs and Differences-Guest Co-host Bronwyn WilsonDuring this episode with guest co-host Dr. Bronwyn Wilson, we talk about what it looks like to find the "Goldilocks Zone"...the "just right" for neurodiverse couples and what might be preventing couples from finding the path towards thriving in their relationship, including:
The importance of both partners accepting the autism diagnosis, or self identification.
Denial can lead to relationship breakdown.
Both partners need to be committed to change and recognize the positives in the relationship.
What it looks like when one partner is the "social secretary".
The importance of "accepting" help.
Creating a more regimented relationship and...2023-07-111h 05Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayMyth Busting Three Beliefs That May be Creating Challenges in Your Neurodiverse Relationship-Heather Parks and Natalie RobertsDuring this episode, Mona is joined by Heather Parks and Natalie Roberts from the Loving Difference online community. Heather and Natalie have been on the podcast numerous times and they were both amazing presenters at the 2023 Neurodiverse Love Conference. On this collaborative episode, the conversation focuses on three myths that may be the source of some of the challenges you and your partner are experiencing in your neurodiverse relationship:
Myth #1) Neurodiversity is the problem that makes all differences more pronounced.
Topics discussed include: The importance of self-awareness and reviewing your own patterns...2023-06-201h 09Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayWhy Divorce Was the Right Next StepOn May 30, 2018, Mona and her ex-husband divorced after 30 years of marriage. While that was one of the most emotionally difficult days of Mona's life, she took the time to heal and created Neurodiverse Love to help others learn from her lived experiences and lessons learned, as well as the expertise and experiences from others. In this solo episode, Mona talks about some of the emotional, communication, sensory, processing and employment differences that had an impact on her marriage. In addition, she shares what happened that made her realize her ex was no longer willing to treat her with the...2023-05-3029 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayConflict Due to Communication Differences, the Prompt Dependency Cycle & Intrinsic-vs- External Motivation-Guest Co-host Bronwyn WilsonDuring this episode with guest co-host Dr. Bronwyn Wilson, we address the challenges that many neurodiverse couples experience because of communication differences. We discuss what it takes to create a win-win conversation and the ways in which many neurotypical/non-autistic partners use prompts to create connection with their partners. This process is called the "Prompt Dependency Cycle" and Bron talks about how this isn't always beneficial for either partner, or the relationship. In addition, we talk about why partners may take things personally and see some questions or certain types of comments as a criticism, when they are actually...2023-05-091h 14Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay"It Could Have Looked So Different"...How an Autism Diagnosis is Changing Their Marriage-with Shawna and Kevin MeekDuring this episode, Shawna and Kevin Meek talk about how different their marriage, and their lives, could have been if they had known Kevin was autistic 20+ years ago. Kevin received his autism diagnosis less then 6 months ago, at the age of 50. Since that time, he and Shawna have worked together to learn how they can thrive individually and as a neurodiverse couple, and they share how different their relationship may have been if they had known earlier that Kevin is autistic. They both share openly and with tremendous vulnerability to help other neurodiverse couples know they are not alone and...2023-04-251h 09Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayThe Language of Affection and How Alexythymia Can Lead to a Collision of Needs- with Guest Co-host Bronwyn WilsonDuring this episode, guest co-host Bronwyn Wilson shares more about her seminal research with neurodiverse couples. In addition, we provide an in-depth look at how alexythymia and having different emotional needs may be impacting your understanding of your partner. So many misunderstandings can occur when one or both partners don't understand what they are feeling, or the emotions they may be experiencing. This can be an ongoing challenge for neurodiverse couples, so during this episode we talk about the ways in which this can lead to "a collision of needs" and how beneficial it can be when both partners...2023-04-1857 min
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayBe Proactive, Not Reactive, to Reach Your Highest Self in Your Neurodiverse Relationship-Renee Rosales, Founder of ThearaDuring this episode, Renee Rosales, the Founder of Theara shares the journey that she and her family have traveled to better understand the strengths, differences, challenges and learning opportunities that neurodiversity brings to their lives.
Renee talks about how being an advocate for her son, took her down a path that helped pave the way for her passion for the "neurodiverse collective". Through Theara she is offering the world an "acronym-based" system that can help build bridges for individuals, families, schools and organizations to learn how to better understand and support each other when there are neurological differences that may no...2023-03-141h 18Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayThe Stigma and Fear That Neurodivergent Individuals and Neurodiverse Couples May Experience-Guest Co-host-Nicole KnowltonIf you missed the First Virtual Neurodiverse Love Conference, no worries...tickets are still available for $98 at: www.neurodiverselove.com. You will be able to hear the 27 Fantastic pre-recorded conference presentations & check out some of the Q&A chats that were held during the conference.
All of the conference sessions will be available to watch until May 15, 2023.
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During this episode, Mona and Nicole Knowlton talk about the stigma and fear neurodivergent individuals and neurodiverse couples may experience when sharing their neurodiverse journey.
Some of the topics addressed include:
The stigma and f...2023-02-2857 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayExperiencing Shame, Guilt, Anger and Denial and Then Reframing Your Relationship After Discovering You Are a Neurodiverse CoupleDuring this episode, Mona talks about some of the emotions and feelings both partners may experience when one or both discovers they are a neurodiverse couple. She shares the shame she felt when she was struggling with postpartum depression for 2 years and attempts to normalize the feeling of not wanting to disclose to others what you are experiencing for fear of how people will respond or judge you. In addition, she discusses the way guilt and anger may be experienced by both partners. She also talks about how one or both partners may experience denial around neurodiversity. Although this may cr...2023-02-1428 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayHope, Grief, Forgiveness, Acceptance and Peace-Understanding What You May Be Feeling in Your Neurodiverse Love RelationshipDuring this episode, Mona goes solo to talk about some of the confusing emotions both partner's may feel after learning they are in a Neurodiverse Love relationship. In the discovery phase, each partner may feel some hope that they will move forward with more understanding for themselves, their partner and their relationship. However, many times, after feeling hopeful, one or both partners may begin to feel grief. The grief will probably look different for each partner, however it's important to acknowledge that it is real . Mona talks about the 7 steps of grieving and how each may look and feel for...2023-01-1735 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayPursuer-Distancer Pattern, Kind Bluntness & Power Issues-Lorna Hecker-Author of: Different Planets: Understanding Your Neurodiverse RelationshipThe Neurodiverse Love Conference will be held on February 14th & 15th, 2023. Buy your ticket before February 11th at midnight EST, to get a 50% discount on your ticket. Click here to learn more about the 27 conference presentations and to buy your ticket today! All the sessions are pre-recorded, so if you are not able to join us live you will have up to 3 months to listen to all the fabulous presentations.
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Lorna Hecker is a therapist, coach and Professor Emerita at Purdue University Northwestern. While at Purdue she directed the Couple and Family Center for 25 years. She i...2023-01-101h 02Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayNeurodiverse Love Conference-Special Bonus Until 1/17/23 at Midnight (EST)If you have already bought your ticket, OR you buy your ticket to the Neurodiverse Love Conference before 1/17/23 at Midnight (EST), you will be able to participate in a FREE live Zoom workshop on 2/21/23 at 7pm EST with the original co-hosts of the Neurodiverse Love podcast (Mona, Olga and Manecia). We will answer your questions and provide everyone with an update on where we are in our lives and the lessons we have learned since we started the podcast. We look forward to talking with all of you on 2/21/23💗. Tickets can be purchased at: www.neurodiverselove.com2023-01-0605 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayParenting and Pregnancy in a Neurodiverse Relationship-Remy SpringerRemy Springer is a new mom and another AANE certified therapist who shares how parenting and pregnancy may impact a neurodiverse couple. More specifically, we discuss how communication challenges can increase and how sleep deprivation and changes to routine can lead to more anxiety. In addition, we address the importance of understanding what each partner needs to be fully present for their partner and family, and the importance of making time to recharge to reduce overwhelm.
We also address the following:
Strategies for helping with the transition from work to home.
Communicating the expectations when transitioning fro...2022-12-0942 min
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayThe “Invisible Challenges" and Life Transitions in Neurodiverse Relationships-Karen WatsonKaren Watson is an AANE certified therapist who provides insight into her professional experience working with neurodiverse couples and her personal experience in a neurodiverse relationship. During one of her therapy sessions, Karen's therapist suggested that she might be married to an autistic man and through that new lens, the way she viewed her marriage began to change. Because of her personal experience, Karen knows how important it is for neurodiverse couples to work with a therapist who understands neurodiverse adults and neurodiverse couples. Many "invisible challenges" may be present that couples (and therapists) may not understand. These invisible challenges that a...2022-11-2049 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayConversation With Autistic Filmmaker Louis Bennies About His Short Film "SIGNALS"---A Love Story About a Neurodiverse RelationshipDuring this bonus episode of the podcast, 23 year old autistic filmmaker Louis Bennies talks about his neurodiverse journey. He shares a little about some of the gifts and unique differences his parents saw in him that may have contributed to them moving forward on his ASD/ADHD diagnosis.
Louis also shares how his college thesis focused on how autistic people are portrayed in film and tv. Part of his work as a writer, filmmaker and producer is to show the world the many dimensions and strengths of autistic individuals. It makes him sad to see only the stereotypes of autism tha...2022-10-2927 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayUsing Collaborative Therapy to Create Relationship Rubrics, Improve Dialogue & Reduce Challenges-Laurie Budlong-MorseDuring this episode, Laurie Budlong-Morse, another AANE certified therapist, shares how she uses the Collaborative Therapy Model to help neurodiverse couples better understand each other and move toward creating a successful relationship. This model focuses on the importance of dialogue with respect and understanding for multiple voices, so that new possibilities can emerge that wouldn’t have happened without understanding and valuing each persons unique perspective.
Other topics discussed are:
Mapping the communication and interaction patterns between the partners. Creating an opportunity for both partners to understand each other’s perspectives-using a neurological lens.
Using Dialogue to create Relationship Rubrics that can...2022-10-1156 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayUnderstanding that "Neurology Matters"-Conversation with Grace Myhill about the AANE Training and CertificationWelcome to Episode 1 of Season 4 of the Neurodiverse Love podcast. During this season, Mona will focus on a series of in-depth conversations with AANE certified therapists and coaches. Mona is partnering with AANE and the Director of the Peter M. Friedman-Neurodiverse Couples Institute, Grace Myhill, so that more neurodiverse couples, and individuals in neurodiverse relationships, will have access to even more helping professionals throughout the world who understand how "neurology matters". During this episode you will learn why Grace and her colleagues at AANE created the "Neurolology Matters" training and certification for therapists and coaches. You will also learn ab...2022-09-0654 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayIntro to Season 4 of the Neurodiverse Love podcastDuring Season 4 of the Neurodiverse Love podcast Mona is partnering with AANE. She will be interviewing many of the therapists and coaches that have completed the AANE "Neurology Matters" training and certification through the AANE Peter M. Friedman Neurodiverse Couples Institute. We hope you enjoy hearing from therapists and coaches in the US and Europe who are helping neurodiverse couples increase understanding and connection in their romantic relationships. For more information about the AANE training and certification, please visit: www.AANE.org2022-09-0501 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayThe Neurodiverse Love G.P.S. (Gaining Perspective for Success)Mona is going solo for the last episode of Season 3 to introduce "The Neurodiverse Love Relationship G.P.S. (Gaining Perspective for Success)";
Most of us use a GPS in our cars to help us get to our desired destinations. However, even though we may know where we are headed, there may be traffic jams, constructions zones, or accidents, that prevent us from getting to our destination on time, and by the route we had planned.
Oftentimes, the relationship we thought we were in may change "a lot", as we learn more about how neurology impacts our relationship. As we get...2022-09-0416 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KaySeasons of a Neurodiverse Relationship-How Things Change From Dating to Mid-Life-with Dr. Theresa ReganDr. Theresa Regan is a neuropsychologist who has extensive experience working with autistic individuals and neurodiverse couples and she has been trained to work with adolescents, adults and aging adults. During this episode she shares both her personal and professional experiences to help us better understand how to navigate the different seasons of a "Neurodiverse Love" relationship.
The topics we address include:
How does the dating relationship change when couples move in together, get married or have children?
How relationship roles and structure can change through dating and beyond
How scripts from tv and film help s...2022-08-301h 01Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayFinding True Love "On the Spectrum", the Second Time Around-Jennifer Cook & Brett BanksDuring this episode you will hear a little about the beautiful love story between Jennifer Cook and Brett Banks. Jennifer Cook was identified as being on the spectrum in 2011. She is the author of 9 bestselling books, the on-camera autistic expert in Netflix's Emmy-nominated series, "Love on the Spectrum-US" and has given presentations at the White House, the National Institute of Health and to royal audiences in Europe. Brett Banks is a Nuclear Licensing Engineer who learned that he was on the spectrum a few years ago, although his ex-wife and daughter had shared this with him many years ago. Bret...2022-08-1554 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KaySexual & Physical Intimacy: Understanding Differences & Challenges in Neurodiverse Relationships-Conversation with Clinical Sexologist-Larry SiegelDuring this episode, Mona and Larry Siegel have an in-depth conversation about ways to better understand and communicate more effectively with your partner about sexual needs and desires. Larry is a Clinical Sexologist and Certified Sexuality Educator and Supervisor, who has been working in this field for over 35 years. He is also the co-host of the YouTube show called "Sex Talk with the Siegel Brothers". During this discussion, we had a very open conversation about SO many topics that neurodiverse couples may be experiencing, but haven't been given the tools to address. This is an episode that you and you...2022-08-081h 13Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayCollaborative Episode on Neurodiverse Relationship Myth-Busting-with Natalie Roberts & Heather Parks from the Loving Difference On-line CommunityMona joined Natalie Roberts and Heather Parks from the Loving Difference Online Community on their "Myth-busting" podcast to bust some myths we may have all experienced in our neurodiverse relationships. During this episode we discuss debunking the following myths:
1) We don't just have to "survive", we can "thrive" in our current relationship, (or choose to move on and create a life in which we can thrive with another partner...or by ourselves).
2) We don't all communicate in the same way, or at the same speed.
3) We don't need to have a happy relationship t...2022-07-2748 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayImproving Social Communication & Increasing Understanding In Neurodiverse Relationships & Families-Cheryl RhodesCheryl Rhodes has been an LMFT for almost 40 years and has spent many years working with families with autistic children and neurodiverse couples. During this episode, she talks openly about her neurodiverse family (her daughter is autistic) and how critical it is for us to understand the history of the term “Neurodiversity” and to focus on both the strengths and differences in everyone...and she talks in-depth about both. During her career, Cheryl has worked with many couples in “high conflict” relationships and she shared that she was in a high conflict marriage that ended. She also understands the stress that thes...2022-07-191h 10Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayThe Neurodiverse Compass & Understanding How We Can Better Navigate Through Time & Space: Jill CorvelliDr. Jill Corvelli has created "The Corvelli ND Compass", and she talks about how this model guides her work with neurodiverse couples, as well as how she is using the “Compass” to help neurodiverse couples better understand how they both navigate through time and space. The model focuses on three core components and each is critical to moving from misunderstanding and challenges, to understanding and acceptance. During this episode, Jill shares how her Compass helps couples increase "education" about each other, so they can come up with a playbook that helps them bridge different styles. How "Niche Construction", helps both pa...2022-07-121h 09Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayA Neurodiverse Family & Marriage-Making Sense of What Was Not Understood-Jen MaliaJen Malia is an author, professor, autism advocate, wife and mom who received her autism diagnosis on the same day as her daughter. She writes about this experience in her New York Times article. Jen shares openly how challenging it was for her to get diagnosed and unfortunately, so many other autistic women will probably relate to her story. Jen had done lots of research, seen various professionals who dismissed her requests for an assessment, however her persistence paid off when she met with a caring, knowledgeable clinical psychologist who properly assessed and diagnosed her.
Jen shares openly...2022-07-0655 min
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayImportance of Strength-Based Communication & Perspective Taking and Addressing Flooding, Co-Dependence, Addictions, & Abuse-Robin Tate-Life CoachDuring this episode, Mona talks with Life Coach-Robin Tate. Robin shares how important it is for her to continuously compliment the successes and strengths of the neurodiverse couples she works with and to remind both partners how their brains are "equal and different". She also discusses communication differences and the importance of addressing "perspective taking" during arguments and for both partners to remember their "on the same team". Robin also shares how literal language and weak central coherence can sometimes cause unintentional misunderstandings and flooding that can lead to shutdowns or meltdowns (flight or fright response).
We als...2022-06-271h 06Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayCandice & Chris-Deep Love Mixed With Misunderstanding & Communication Challenges...Until the Autism Diagnosis-Sharing Tools & Mindset Shifts That Changed Everything!Candice and Chris have a special, deep love for each other and couldn't understand why they kept having SO many communication challenges and misunderstandings in their relationship. As Candice began to get feedback from Chris and her colleagues, she realized that she needed a way to communicate better. Based on a look back at some of her past and current challenges she began to suspect she was autistic and moved forward on a formal diagnosis. After her diagnosis, everything changed for her and her husband Chris. Candice calls Chris her "special interest" as she shares some of the things she...2022-05-171h 07Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayEmployment, Special Interests & Communicating Your Needs-Collaborative Podcast between "Loving Difference" & "Neurodiverse Love"Many of us would love to turn our special interests or passion into paid employment, however that isn't always possible. During this episode, Mona, Heather and Natalie talk about the challenges they experienced in school and employment and how they have worked to create ways to use their gifts and talents through paid employment, volunteering or hobbies. They also share some of the challenges and experiences their partners/ex-partners have experienced, as well as their children. They address the things they wish employers and our society could do differently to support everyone's strengths and meet their needs, so that mo...2022-05-111h 05Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayTeamwork, Love and Understanding In Neurodiverse Families-Stephanie & Dan Holmes from the Neurodiverse Christian Couples PodcastThis is another fantastic episode that neurodiverse couples may want to listen to together! Stephanie and Dan Holmes have known each other since they were 10 and have been married almost 30 years. After their daughter was diagnosed with Asperger's in the mid-2000’s, Stephanie read about adults on the spectrum and realized that her husband was autistic too (he already suspected he was). Prior to learning about their neurodiversity, Stephanie thought a lot of their miscommunication and struggles occurred because Dan is very intelligent. However, once they learned he was autistic, so many challenging things started to make more sense. Throu...2022-05-031h 09Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayAre You Parenting Your Partner in Your Neurodiverse Love Relationship?During this episode Mona and Manecia talk about a topic that may be difficult for both the autistic and non-autistic partners to hear, but is important to address, because it is something that has happened in both of their relationships (and may be happening in yours).
No one wants to feel like they have to parent their partner, however acknowledging that this may be happening and talking about ways in which the non-autistic/neurotypical partner can ask before stepping in to help (or parent) can be SO helpful. Some people might call this type of "support" co-dependency...2022-04-1949 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayThe Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards-Understand, Value and Appreciate Each Others Strengths and Differences, One Question At A TimeDuring this short bonus episode of the podcast, Mona shares “WHY” she created the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards, “HOW” they can be used so that each partner can feel safe to share their needs and wants, and “WHAT” can be achieved when both partners come from a place of grace and compassion.
Mona's parents were in a Neurodiverse Love marriage for over 40 years and never knew. In addition, she didn't know she was in a neurodiverse relationship until the 29th year of her 30 year marriage. By creating and releasing the cards, Mona hopes more neurodiverse couples will feel valued, heard and appreciated...2022-04-1306 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayEva A. Mendes-Author of-Marriage and Lasting Relationships with AS/ASD-Successful Strategies for Couples or CounselorsEva is a psychotherapist, an ASD specialist and the author of several books, including "Marriage and Lasting Relationships with Asperger's Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder).-Successful Strategies for Couples or Counselors. During this episode Eva shares so much valuable information for both partners in a Neurodiverse Love relationship. Our conversation addresses ways to avoid meltdowns and shutdowns; how to address or change expectations; getting your needs met and doing things together that work well for both partners. We also talk about physical and sexual intimacy, ways in which to get accountability, the value of medication for some and the impact of tra...2022-04-121h 03Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayAlix & Roy-Misdiagnosis, Trauma, Understanding, Love and Compassion-A Neurodiverse JourneyDuring this episode, Alix and Roy share so many of the lessons they have learned together since their friendship began in 2008. After building a wonderful friendship for 5 years they started dating in 2013 and have been married since 2018. Alix shares opening about her misdiagnosis and how at 13 she was placed in a facility that led to trauma that continues to impact her today. Alix also talks about her resiliency and strength and the way in which she and Roy have grown together in their relationship. Both Roy and Alix share some of the strategies they use to support each other dur...2022-04-111h 02Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayAddressing the Triggers in Our Neurodiverse Love RelationshipsOur triggers provide opportunities for us to heal and grow or they continue to create situations that we react to, rather then respond to. Unfortunately, this can create lots of resentment and anger, as well as unintentional pain and hurt. During this episode, Mona and Manecia talk about the triggers they have had in their neurodiverse relationships and how some of those are connected to unresolved issues in their family of origin. They also talk about how they have reduced their "reactions" to various triggers because they understand themselves better. Instead of getting triggered and holding on to anger and...2022-04-1155 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KaySharing What Makes Their Neurodiverse Love Relationship Thrive-Sira & MarcelSira Busch received her formal autistic diagnosis a year ago and during this podcast episode she and her partner Marcel share their lived experience before and after the diagnosis. They were both interested in math and that was one of the things that attracted them to each other. Sira talks about the relationship she has had with herself for the last 28 years and how she fully accepted all the differences she saw, even though others may not have understood them. Sira shares how she was often observing her feelings and herself through her own beautiful lens. Sira wants to go on a...2022-03-211h 02Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayPaul Micallef from "Asperger's from the Inside"- Emotional Intelligence & Letting Go of Unconscious Expectations in Your Neurodiverse Love RelationshipDo you wonder why your partner doesn't understand your needs? Do you have challenges communicating your boundaries effectively in your Neurodiverse Love relationship? Do you know what emotional intelligence is and how it can help you communicate more effectively with your partner? These are some of the important topics that Paul Micallef addresses in this fantastic podcast episode!
Paul has had a successful career as an engineer and from a young age he had an interest in emotional intelligence (EI) and has spent his life becoming an expert in this area. Diagnosed at 30, Paul started sharing his auti...2022-03-1459 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayStephanie Bethany-Understanding Each Other's Perspective, Processing and Emotions & Being Able to "De-Code" for Each OtherWhen Stephanie Bethany married her husband at 19 she didn't know she was autistic, however when she was diagnosed at 23, things began to make more sense. Working together she and her husband have grown and learned so much. During this episode, Stephanie shares how understanding neurodiversity has helped her and her husband let go of so many misunderstandings they had in the earlier years of their relationship and marriage. They both have a better understanding of each other's intentions and know that they are there to help and "de-code" things for each other. Stephanie shares openly the ways in which she...2022-03-0858 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayDan Jones of "The Aspie World"-Thriving in Life and His Neurodiverse RelationshipIt was a pleasure to talk with Dan Jones, the creator of The Aspie World about how he is thriving in life and in his Neurodiverse Love relationship. When Dan was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome at 26, he didn't know what that meant and began searching for information that would help him better understand his diagnosis. After finding limited content about neurodiversity and adult autism, he decided that he wanted to share his story and the lessons he was learning on his journey and he created The Aspie World. Dan's positive attitude and energy is contagious! During this episode, he sha...2022-03-021h 05Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayRecognizing the Differences in Your Relationship & Getting Real About Your Feelings-Collaborative Podcast with "Neurodiverse Love" & "Loving Difference"This is the first collaborative podcast between members of the "Neurodiverse Love" team and the "Loving Difference" team. We will be doing collaborative podcast episodes throughout the year and look forward to sharing our different perspectives and the lived experiences we have had, as we all address both the strengths and differences in our neurodiverse relationships. During this episode, Mona, Natalie and Heather share soae of the differences they noticed in their love relationships, that others did not experience. In addition, they go deep on how important emotional boundaries are to reduce anger and resentment and how meeting your own...2022-02-251h 04
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayUnderstanding Perspectives, Paradigm Shifts, & Social Quotas-Leslie Sickels, LCSWDuring this episode, Leslie Sickels, LCSW shares so many important strategies for creating a strength based, successful "Neurodiverse Love" relationship. Leslie talks about how important it is to ground your relationship in neurodiversity and understand that having different brains means each partner will have an opportunity to learn and grow in ways that will help them succeed individually and in their relationship. She talks about the importance of communicating what you need from your partner in conversations. For example: Do you need support or problem solving?; and what happens when you are clear with your partner about what you need to h...2022-02-231h 02
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayDr. Valerie Gaus-Strategies and Tools to Make "Any" Love Relationship SuccessfulDr. Valerie Gaus is a clinical psychologist whose focus is on treating mental health issues in adults with autism spectrum disorder, including depression, anxiety, stress and trauma. She is also the author of "Living Well on the Spectrum. How to Use Your Strengths to Meet the Challenges of Asperger Syndrome/High-Functioning Autism" and "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Adults with Autism Spectrum Disorder, Second Edition"
During this episode, Valerie talks about the circuitous route her career took to put her on the path to begin working with autistic adults. She also focuses on how communication is the key to...2022-02-231h 02Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayProfessor Tony Attwood & Dr. Michelle Garnett: Keys to Successful Neurodiverse RelationshipsDuring this episode, two of the most well-known experts in autism and neurodiverse relationships, Professor Tony Attwood and Dr. Michelle Garnett, share key tips and tools that will help both partners thrive in a Neurodiverse Love relationship There are so many nuggets of gold in this conversation, that we hope neurodiverse couples will listen to this episode together. Whether you are trying to understand each other's communication differences; wondering whether using texts, emails or sharing songs, will work better to express your thoughts and feelings; or you are working to understand the value of your partners special interests or emo...2022-02-191h 05
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayRelationship Renewal-How to Create “Values” Based Plans & Strategies to Thrive- Dr. Thomas LuckingDr. Thomas Lucking, Ph.D., LMFT, started his career in technology and then chose to pivot and become a therapist. Having these two areas of expertise gives Dr. Thomas a unique and important perspective on neurodiverse relationships. During this episode, Dr. Thomas provides a wealth of important information and concrete strategies to help neurodiverse couples understand each other better, while working on the issues that create the most challenges in their relationships.
Dr. Thomas shares how couples can understand each others priorities and values and create a "Values Based Family Plan" together. This plan can then held lead to increased und...2022-02-1452 min
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayJodi Carlton-Helping to "Crack the Communication Code" as a Neurodiverse Couples CoachJodi Carlton, M.Ed. is an internationally recognized autism relationship and neurodiversity expert and coach. During this episode she shared her own lived experience and how she is helping neurodiverse couples around the world find better ways to understand each others strengths and differences. She shares how important it is to value and respect each other's perspective and has created the "Crack the Communication Code" course to help neurodiverse couples work through the communication challenges that may keep recurring. You may also want to check out her website to link to the free resource to get your Neurodiversity/Autism Sco...2022-01-221h 06
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayStrategies to Reset Your Neurodiverse Relationship and Thrive with Dr. Harry Motro from the Neurodiverse Couples Counseling CenterDr. Harry Motro spent the earlier part of his career in technology and then chose a second career in counseling. HIs passion to take the best tools and strategies and combine them to help neurodiverse couples move from "barely surviving" to "thriving" is so enlightening and inspirational. During this episode, you will learn the value of the "red, yellow and green cards" to proactively and compassionately deal with issues that previously might have become arguments, meltdowns, or shutdowns. You will also learn how to create a "love list" with your partner that can help you both learn how to val...2022-01-151h 05
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayHow Boundaries and the" Four Agreements" Can Improve Life in a Neurodiverse RelationshipHappy New Year to all our listeners! This episode provides a lot of food for thought and great information that can help you make improvements in yourself and in turn, in your neurodiverse relationship
During this episode, we talk about how important it is for us to communicate and maintain our boundaries for our mental, emotional and spiritual health. We also discuss how understanding and implementing the "Four Agreements", by Don Miguel Ruiz can help improve life in a neurodiverse relationship.
The Four Agreements are:
1) Be Impeccable With Your Word
2) Don't Take...2022-01-0855 min
Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayMona's 32 Year Journey Through Love, Confusion, Loneliness, Anger, Separation and Divorce. Then Moving to Healing, Growth and Thriving.In this episode, Manecia interviews Mona as she shares about some of the experiences she had when she did not know she was in a neurodiverse marriage. She and her ex loved each other very much, but that was not enough to get them to a place of understanding, which was what was greatly needed in their marriage. Not knowing you are in a neurodiverse relationship can lead to SO much confusion and loneliness, which can then turn into repeated anger and fights, that never seem to get resolved. Mona talks about what led her to move forward on a...2022-01-011h 04Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayAlina Kislenko-Changing Therapeutic Models & Creating Paradigm Shifts in Neurodiverse Couples CounselingPsychotherapist and Professor Alina Kislenko is redesigning therapeutic models for neurodivergent individuals and neurodiverse couples. She is committed to training other therapists so that ableism and oppressive views of neurodiversity became a thing of the past. Alina shared how her "PI" model of "Parts Inclusion" can create new words and ways of communicating emotions in neurodiverse relationships. In addition, her and her neurodivergent husband (who is also a therapist) are both ADHD and autistic and they work together regularly to reassess their strengths and challenges. Alina talks about the importance of having regular "State of the Union" meetings (a concept dev...2021-12-251h 03Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayJoe (a Therapist) & Mike (an engineer)-Their 29 Year Journey of Love & LearningJoe is a therapist and Mike is an engineer and in many ways they might be considered opposites. However, during this episode they share how during their almost 30 years together, they have learned how to navigate their differences and focus on each others strengths. When they started getting serious in their relationship Joe moved into Mike's house and Joe shares some of the challenges that presented during the first few years of living together. They now have a great arrangement where they each have living space on different floors of their home and they spend time together watching tv and sh...2021-12-1150 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayMichelle & Andrew-Inspirational Neurodiverse Couple, New Parents, TIkTok Stars and Soon-to-Be Published AuthorsMona and Manecia had such a wonderful time talking to Michelle and Andrew learning about their "Neurodiverse Love" journey. After they met on a dating app, they were friends for a year before they started dating. Michelle shared that she almost broke up with Andrew twice and she shares why. Fortunately, while reading a book chapter about "Autistic Echos" Michelle recognized many of the things she didn't understand about Andrew and approached him with compassion and kindness to discuss what she had read.
During this episode Michelle and Andrew share some of the strategies they have been usin...2021-12-041h 11Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayUnderstanding the Misinterpretations and Unintentional Hurt, Pain and Trauma Both Partners Can CauseDuring this episode, Mona and Manecia talk openly and honestly about some of the unintentional hurt and pain that they have both caused in their relationships, as well as what their partners may have done in past or present relationships. When you don't know you are in neurodiverse relationship, or you know, but don't have the skills and tools needed to navigate the challenges and differences between the two different neurotypes, lots of arguments, disagreements, meltdowns and shutdowns can lead to unintentional hurt, pain and trauma. None of these create harmony and peace in any relationship, however in a ne...2021-11-261h 01Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayInternal Family Systems & How Our "Parts" Impact Our Relationships with Dr. Kim BollingJoin us for this fantastic episode where we have an opportunity to talk with Dr. Kim Bolling. Kim is a couples therapist and provides counseling and coaching for neurodiverse couples. Kim talks with us about how she uses Internal Family Systems (IFS) and Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO) to help individuals and neurodiverse couples learn more about the "parts" that can create challenges in their relationship. Kim provides the tools and techniques to help you and your partner work through some of the things that may keep you in the "communication roundabout" where you keep having the same argu...2021-11-201h 00Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayHow an ASD Diagnosis Began to Transform Their 24 Year MarriageAlina and her husband have been married for 24 years and have 5 sons. Throughout their marriage, they have experienced lots of challenges that other couples weren't having. However, it wasn't until her husband was diagnosed, earlier this year, with Autism Spectrum Disorder, that those challenges began to make sense. When Alina found the "Neurodiverse Love" podcast she realized she was not alone and her thinking and the way she communicated with her husband began to change. Alina shares openly and honestly about the journey she is on to understand how to thrive in her marriage. During the past few months, she...2021-11-131h 03Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayWhen Your Man is On the Spectrum-To Know, Understand and Transform Your Relationship-Author & Neurodiverse Couples Coach-Dr. Pnina Arad-For her doctoral dissertation, Dr. Pnina Arad conducted ground-breaking research with women in neurodiverse relationships and published her book, "When Your Man is On the Spectrum-To Know, Understand and Transform Your Relationship" to share all that she learned during her research. During this episode, Pnina provides us with insightful information that will help provide neurodiverse couples with ways in which they can better understand each other and begin to build a healthy neurodiverse relationship.
Our discussion about some of the key differences and misunderstandings that neurodiverse couples may be experiencing can help both partners navigate their different soc...2021-10-301h 02Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayLoving Difference-On-line Community for Learning How to Thrive in Life & a Neurodiverse Relationship-Coaches and Co-founders: Natalie Roberts and Heather ParksDuring this episode you will hear from two of the four co-founders and coaches in the "Loving Difference" on-line community. This site was created to help individuals and couples learn how to thrive in life and in their neurodiverse relationships. Natalie Roberts and Heather Parks share some of the lessons they have learned in their neurodiverse relationships and provide insightful information and strategies on how they have managed and worked through the ups and downs in their neurodiverse marriages. Their honesty, sense of humor and passion for helping others thrive is both inspirational and educational.
You can jo...2021-10-231h 13Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayWhat to Say Next--Successful Communication in Work, Life, and Love with Autism Spectrum Disorder-Meet the Authors of this Book-- Sarah & Larry Nannery who are a Very Inspirational Neurodiverse CoupleDuring this episode, Sarah and Larry Nannery share the lessons they have learned during their 10 year Neurodiverse Love relationship. Their motto is "Better Together" and it is clear that they personify this motto. Sarah sought a diagnosis after she became a parent and realized that managing all of her new responsibilities was more then she was prepared for, and at 31 she received a formal ASD diagnosis. She has now taken some of the lessons she has learned on her journey and partnered with Larry to write "What to Say--Successful Communication in Work, Life, and Love with Autism Spectrum Disorder"....2021-10-161h 01Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayThe Value of an ASD Diagnosis & the Impact of Knowing on Our Love RelationshipsDuring this episode we talk about whether it's important to have a formal ASD diagnosis to understand the best ways to create a successful relationship. No one can make this decision for you, however Mona and Manecia discuss how they feel about the different ways to understand that you and your partner have different neurotypes. They also discuss the value of disclosing that you are autistic while dating. Whether you or your partner have a formal diagnosis, are self diagnosed or you suspect that one or both of you may be on the autism spectrum, this episode will give you...2021-10-0953 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayMona and Olga Share Some Lessons Learned & Celebrate 1 Year Anniversary of "Neurodiverse Love" PodcastTo celebrate the one year anniversary of the Neurodiverse Love podcast, Mona and Olga are co-hosting this special episode to talk about some of the important lessons they have learned in their various neurodiverse relationships. During the first season, at the end of each podcast episode, lessons learned have been shared about the topic that was discussed. During this special episode, some of those important lessons are revisited.
Mona and Olga started this podcast a year ago, because they hoped that sharing their stories about their Neurodiverse Love relationships would help at least one person, or one ne...2021-10-0439 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KayLearning Better Communication Strategies for Neurodiverse Couples-Dr. Ali ArenaDuring this episode, Mona and Manecia have the pleasure of talking with communication expert, Dr. Ali Arena. Ali has been working for years with autistic children, parents and neurodiverse couples to help them improve their communication skills. During our conversation, Ali provides so many insightful and helpful strategies for dealing with black and white thinking, different processing styles, and emotional differences that can help neurodiverse couples understand each other better. We also explore why each neurotype may have so many challenges understanding their partners communication methods and reactions. This is definitely an episode you don't want to miss!
To...2021-09-251h 05Neurodiverse Love with Mona KayNeurodiverse Couples Coach, Minister, Wife and Mother in a Neurodiverse Marriage-Janelle HardingThis episode is filled with pearls of wisdom and lots of laughter as Mona and Manecia welcome Janelle Harding to the "Neurodiverse Love" podcast. Janelle has been in a neurodiverse relationship for a few years and her and her husband have a one year old son. She talks about her no nonsense way of dealing with her husband's mind-blindness, black and white thinking, food preferences and special interests. Janelle also shares some of the lessons she has learned as a coach for neurodiverse couples and through her role as a minister. She also addresses the importance of autonomy and self-care i...2021-09-181h 07
Neurodiverse Love-Sharing Lessons Learned and Lived Experiences in Neurodiverse RelationshipsNeurodiverse Love-Season 2 IntroductionWe have changed the account we will be using for Season 2, so please check out the first episode and subscribe at: https://anchor.fm/neurodiverse-love or check out the link in our bio on Instagram @neurodiverse_love
We hope you will join us and subscribe to Season 2 of the "Neurodiverse Love" podcast as Mona and Manecia share more lessons learned and lived experiences. We will also have more guests joining us on the podcast. We hope that hearing from others in "Neurodiverse Love" relationships, as well as those who are providing counseling or coaching...2021-08-2304 minNeurodiverse Love with Mona KaySeason 2-Neurodiverse Love podcast is on a new account-"Please subscribe again"The first season of the "Neurodiverse Love" podcast includes 30 episodes of our lived experiences and lessons learned in "Neurodiverse Love" relationships. In addition, we published five episodes with various guests, who share their very interesting neurodiverse stories. We had to change the account we are using to record Season 2 of the podcast, so if you want to continue with us on this "Neurodiverse Love" journey please subscribe to both Season 1 and Season 2.
Thanks everyone!
Follow us on Instagram @neurodiverse_love
Check out our website @ neurodiverselove.com
E-mail us@ ne...2021-08-1901 min
Neurodiverse Love-Sharing Lessons Learned and Lived Experiences in Neurodiverse RelationshipsChange can happen when you don't take things personal, create your own happiness & review your own behaviorDuring this episode we talk about how important emotional reciprocity is to the neurotypical partner and how each partner needs to create their own happiness, instead of relying on the other to be their only source of fun and happiness. We also talk about some of the ways in which each partner can get their needs met through respectful. loving communication. In addition, we talk about the challenges couples may have because of unresolved trauma from undiagnosed autism and how that can have an impact on the neurodiverse relationship.
As we continue to expand our...2021-07-3158 minNeurodiverse Love-Sharing Lessons Learned and Lived Experiences in Neurodiverse RelationshipsKate & Clark-A Neurodiverse Couple-Marriage and Family Life on the SpectrumWe are so excited to share this episode with our listeners. Kate and Clark have been married for 9 years and in October, 2020, Clark was officially diagnosed as autistic. During this episode, this neurodiverse couple share openly and honestly about the ups and downs of being in a ND Love relationship. They share how they met, what attracted them to each other, what it's like to receive an ASD diagnosis as a married adult with two children. They also talk about how they are learning to handle communication challenges, the importance of emotional reciprocity, more effective...2021-07-251h 03Neurodiverse Love-Sharing Lessons Learned and Lived Experiences in Neurodiverse RelationshipsSharing that you are in a Neurodiverse Love relationshipAs more and more adults are diagnosed with autism (or they self-diagnose), it is critical that we find ways to understand and accept the various neurotypes that exist. We all bring strengths and opportunities for improvement to our professional and personal lives, however, if we are quick to judge or negate each other, and don't seek understanding and acceptance, we lose out on so many wonderful learning, healing and growth opportunities. Many partners in Neurodiverse Love relationships may be dealing with the Cassandra Syndrome. This happens when they share with others some of the unique experiences...2021-07-1129 minNeurodiverse Love-Sharing Lessons Learned and Lived Experiences in Neurodiverse RelationshipsThe Challenges of Masking When You're in LoveMasking may be a coping mechanism for many people on the spectrum and they many not even be aware that they are doing it. However, it can cause many challenges in an intimate relationship. Not feeling comfortable to be your true self with your partner, creates stress and anxiety and can lead to health issues. Learn more about how masking affected the relationships we were in and why we both feel masking isn't a healthy way of coping, for anyone.
Please feel free to contact us at Neurodiverselove4u@gmail.com and follow...2020-11-2125 minNeurodiverse Love-Sharing Lessons Learned and Lived Experiences in Neurodiverse RelationshipsLife with Extended Family in a Neurodiverse RelationshipDuring this episode, we talk about some of the challenges (and connections) that our exes experienced with their biological families. Being in a neurodiverse relationship requires a lot of band-with for the person on the spectrum, and sometimes being able to cope with relationships with extended family can be challenging. Learn how this experience played out in our relationships.
Please feel free to contact us at Neurodiverselove4u@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram @neurodiverse_love
Thanks everyone!2020-11-1425 minNeurodiverse Love-Sharing Lessons Learned and Lived Experiences in Neurodiverse RelationshipsUp up and away we go-Traveling in a Neurodiverse RelationshipWe both traveled a lot during our relationships and each of us had unique challenges getting ready to travel and during each trip we took. If you don't know you are in a neurodiverse relationship there are so many challenges that can add stress to traveling. Our partners had to leave the comfort of their homes and safe environments to travel to a place they may want to go to, but there was less control then when they were at home. Clear communication about timelines and what activities would be taking place during the trip would...2020-11-0929 minNeurodiverse Love-Sharing Lessons Learned and Lived Experiences in Neurodiverse RelationshipsThe Beginning of Our Neurodiverse RelationshipsHow we started this journey of loving very special men in our neurodiverse relationships.
If you are in a neurodiverse relationship "The Autism Couple's Workbook, Second Edition, by Maxine Aston" may help you deal with some of the challenges you are experiencing.
Please feel free to contact us at Neurodiverselove4u@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram @neurodiverse_love
Thanks everyone!2020-09-2717 min