Shows
SextrasWTF Is Kink, Anyway? With Gigi EngleIf there's one aspect of sex that's severely misunderstood, it's kink. From 50 Shades of Grey misrepresenting it as being non-consensual and all about pain, to the stigma of openly associating with any kind of desire that's not ✨mainstream✨ it can be a little intimidating to consciously decide to engage in kink for the first time. And not least because there's so much information out there that, as a beginner, it can be easy to feel overwhelmed and wonder if your desires even count as kink at all.Well, never fear, because in this episode we're joined by t...
2026-02-1044 minSextrasSexual Confidence and How to Talk About What Turns You On (with Dr Tara)It's no secret talking about sex can be awkward – that is, if you get round to doing it at all. But what with a lack of sex education, the fact that pleasure for women and LGBTQ+ people is basically completely ignored, and not to mention the rise of conservatism, it can be almost impossible to know what to say and how to describe your pleasure. That's where sexual confidence is crucial. This week, we're joined by Dr Tara Suwinyattichaiporn, the dating expert on Channel 4's Celebs Go Dating, host of the Luvbites podcast, and professor of se...
2026-01-2744 minSextrasSurveillance Culture Is Impacting Your Dating LifeYou can run (in circles) but you can’t hide from the panopticon, so of course we had to make our first episode of season four all about how surveillance culture plays out in relationships and sex.If you’ve not heard of the extremely esoteric (joking!) philosopher Foucault, don’t worry – we start the episode explaining exactly what panopticon theory is and why you should care, before diving into how we’re policing each other in every aspect of our relationships.You’ll be thankful to hear it’s not all theory, because we loo...
2026-01-131h 20SextrasRelationship Reveal, Adjusting to Living With a Partner & (Finally) Getting Big Girl JobsSextras is back! Once again it's been a while but we promise it's for good reason and we get into why in this little catch up episode.We start with the headlines, namely revealing a new relationship, the challenges of living with a partner, moving out of a family home, and the fact that neither of us are unemployed any longer.Honey discusses moving out of her family home for the first time at 24, the shame of still living at home in your 20s and how relationships with your family change once you've...
2024-06-0450 minSextrasTowards A Positive Masculinity (with Ben Hurst)Our masculinity miniseries has been a little negative up until now (we’re aware of it at least!). But this week that all changes because we’re joined by Ben Hurst – activist, educator, and Head of Facilitation and Training at Beyond Equality – to discuss how we can rethink masculinity.As someone who regularly works with young boys in schools, we talk to Ben about what representation boys see of masculinity. In his Ted Talk, notes that boys will be what we teach them to be, so we talk about what characteristics boys currently associate with masculinity and bein...
2023-11-2153 minSextrasA Look Into Male FriendshipsIn the second episode of our Masculinity miniseries, we unpack everything to do with male friendships. While it comes as no surprise to some of us, the fact that men don’t have supportive friendships has been in the news a lot of late, with claims that there’s a male friendship recession and that men are lonelier than ever.After years of wondering what men talk to their friends about, we thought we’d find out for ourselves. In the process, we’ve probably lost all of our (admittedly, very few) male friends by asking them end...
2023-11-1449 minSextrasWhat Is Masculinity in 2023?Welcome to the first episode of our Masculinity miniseries! Masculinity has been under scrutiny the last few years: on one side, there are claims that masculinity is “toxic”, “fragile” or “in crisis”, and on the other there are those who claim “not all men” are responsible for this poor perception of masculinity. While we fully support bad behaviour being held to account here at Sextras, we wanted to discuss what masculinity really means to gen z in 2023. Is masculinity good or bad? Is it always related to men? What are the characteristics of masculinity? And i...
2023-11-0749 min
SextrasThe Ultimatum: Queer Love DebriefTW: domestic abuse and toxic relationships Spoilers ahead!! We thought we’d celebrate pride month (very last minute, as always) with a discussion of the Ultimatum, Queer Love. In this episode we delve into the drama of the show and unpack why we think each of the couples were doomed to failure.Listen in as we discuss gay marriage, including why people want to even get married in the first place and how the whole premise of the show is extremely queer. We then unpack each of the final couples, answering wheth...
2023-06-2753 minSextrasMaking and Keeping Friends with Shasta NelsonWelcome back to the final episode of our friendship miniseries! In this episode we’re joined by female friendship expert and author of Frientimacy, Shasta Nelson to talk all about making and maintaining friends.If you’d rather watch the podcast you can find the whole video episode on our Patreon: https://patreon.com/sextraspodcast?utm_medium=clipboard_copy&utm_source=copyLink&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=join_linkWe start the episode by asking Shasta why people have difficulty making friends and hear some different ways of making friends. Shasta explains that most...
2022-12-061h 08SextrasWhen Friendships Become More Than FriendshipJOIN OUR PATREON community to continue getting involved in these conversations and to get access to full raw video footage of each episode and exclusive bonus content: Welcome to our first episode of our first ever miniseries!! This miniseries is all about friendship and we’re kicking it off with an episode about what happens when you’re more than friends with someone.We start the episode with a segment where we ask if you’ve ever caught feelings for a friend and if you’ve ever had sex with a friend, plus if you woul...
2022-11-221h 00SextrasCatching Up Before The New SeasonWelcome back to Sextras! Your favourite sex and relationship podcast is back for season 3, baby, and to make up for a very long season break we’ve got a catch up episode where we tell you about our summers (and now...autumns) and outline everything that’s happening this season.We’re changing up the format slightly because (as you’ll know if you’re living your 20s with us) things are slightly hectic right now, so we'll be releasing episodes less frequently and in miniseries. We're kicking off the season with a miniseries about friendship, from toxic...
2022-11-1532 minSextrasIs Love Blind & Would You Ever Give An Ultimatum In A Relationship We thought we’d surprise you with a little bonus episode we recorded a while ago in which we review Love Is Blind and The Ultimatum: Marry Or Move On, shows on Netflix, and talk about what they tell us about dating culture on a wider scale.We give our opinions on the concepts of the shows and the ways people act when put in those positions, and then attempt to answer the larger questions raised by the shows such as if love is blind and if it’s ok to give someone an ultimatum in a relation...
2022-07-1257 minSextras2 Years of Sextras & Your ConfessionsThis episode is our last of the season, so we talk about what we have learnt about relationships this season, our favourite and least favourite moments and answer all of the submissions from our listeners that we have stacked up over the past few months.We begin by giving a run down of the season- which moments stood out to us, what we’ve learnt, how we’ve changed, and spill some tea about the behind the scenes of the podcast. We point you guys in the direction of certain episodes should you be looking for advi...
2022-06-281h 02SextrasTalking With My Mum (Pt.2)We’re finally back with part 2 of season 1’s episode ‘Talking To My Mum,’ where we spoke to Honey’s mum. This week, we’re joined by Maria’s mum, Maria, to hear all about being a mum of four and moving from Mexico to London.We begin the episode by hearing about Maria’s upbringing in Mexico and what sex education in Mexico is like. She tells us about how sex wasn’t even spoken about when she was growing up and how this influenced how she wanted to talk to her own kids about sex and relationsh...
2022-06-211h 00SextrasAre Gen Z Having Less Sex? With Dr Aditi PaulIn this week’s episode we talk to the wonderful Dr Aditi Paul about her research on Gen Z hookup and dating culture. Her book The Current Collegiate Hookup Culture is out now, so please request that your local library or institution purchase it!We begin the episode by hearing about Aditi’s interest in dating and hookup trends, which inspired her to begin her research on this topic. Aditi is a professor at Pace University, so we ask her if she and her colleagues have assumptions about how gen z date and have sex at uni...
2022-06-141h 08SextrasTalking to My Ex GirlfriendIn this week’s episode we’re talking with Honey’s ex girlfriend, Neha, all about their relationship and break up.We begin the episode by hearing about both sides of the relationship, from how they met to how the relationship progressively got worse and eventually how they broke up. If you’ve been listening to the podcast for a while, you’ll know that Honey has spoken about how her first relationship was quite toxic, and so we break down exactly what that looked like in a young queer relationship, and how that has affected them going forw...
2022-06-0758 minSextrasShould Love Be Difficult? Love Languages & ExpectationsWhen it comes to love, there are some people that believe love should be difficult, and some that it should be easy. In this week’s episode we attempt to answer if love should be easy or hard, discussing how to communicate your expectations and how to show love to your partner depending on their love language.We begin the episode with a segment where we ask our listeners if they think love should be hard, as well as hearing some things they are willing to compromise and things they are absolutely not, as well as wh...
2022-05-3155 minSextrasHow Friendships ChangeUnfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it) it is a fact of life that most friendships change over time. This week we want to talk about just that, and our experience with how friendships change in your 20s.We begin the episode with a segment where we ask you guys if you feel like your friendships have changed, and if so how. Then we did a poll asking what is worse— a friend break up or drifting apart— and if you’ve made any new friends recently.Though some friendships will never die, it...
2022-05-2455 minSextrasSexting, Nudes & FaceTime SexTrigger warning: mention of SA at the end of the episode.This week we’re talking about all things sex + phone related: from sexting, taking and sending nudes and having facetime or phone sex.We begin the episode with a segment where we ask you what the best sext or nude you’ve sent or received is, and your tips for taking nudes and sexting. Then, we move on to discussing our own experiences with taking nudes and sexting, and if we enjoy doing them.Honey gives us some facetime sex tips...
2022-05-1755 minSextrasHow To Give Relationship Advice To A FriendThis week we’re discussing whether other people’s relationships are your business. Though it can be helpful to get relationship advice, sometimes people offer unsolicited relationship advice when you feel as though it’s none of their business, so we break down when it’s acceptable to give relationship advice, who it’s acceptable to do it with and the reasons why you might comment on someone else’s relationship.We begin the episode with a segment where we ask you whether you think it’s appropriate for other people to comment on your relationship. We then hear what...
2022-05-1054 minSextrasLife After Uni: Maintaining Relationships, Moving Out & TravellingLife after graduating uni is very confusing— for the first time in your life, you might not know what you’re going to be doing with your life for the foreseeable future. It can be easy to feel lost after university- the uncertainty of where you’re going to be living, your friendships, and your relationships can really get you down, and so this week we’re talking all about it.It’s been a year since we graduated uni, so we thought we’d have a little catch up. We tell you guys about Maria’s long distanc...
2022-05-0341 minSextrasIs Cheating Forgivable?This week we’re talking about something that isn’t particularly pleasant for anyone to talk about, but something that definitely needs to be acknowledged when discussing sex and relationships: cheating.We begin the episode with a segment where we hear from you guys about whether you’ve ever been cheated on, or ever cheated on anybody, and if so what happened, to understand a little bit more of how many people have experienced cheating and how it affects relationships. We also ask if people would break up with someone because of cheating, to which 92% of people said t...
2022-04-2649 minSextrasSocial Media, Relationships & Mental HealthGet 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code SEXTRAS20 at Manscaped.com. It’s time to throw out your old hygiene habits and upgrade your life!This week we’re talking all about social media— the good and the bad, and particularly how it affects our relationships with ourselves and our most important relationship- ourselves!We begin the episode with a segment where we hear from your guys’ feelings about social media, including whether you like it overall and what you hate the most about it. Mostly, people seem to hate that social media is...
2022-04-1944 minSextrasFinding The Best Type of Contraception for MeGet 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code SEXTRAS20 at Manscaped.com. It’s time to throw out your old hygiene habits and upgrade your life!This week we’re talking all things contraception! We begin the episode with a segment where we hear whether you guys are contraception, and if so if you use hormonal contraception or non hormonal/ barrier methods of contraception.We then move on to discussing our own experiences with contraception to show the different ways the same form of contraception can affect everyone differently. We talk through the different forms of co...
2022-04-1249 minSextrasSex Worker Rights Are Human Rights with Chanelle GallantGet 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code SEXTRAS20 at Manscaped.com. It’s time to throw out your old hygiene habits and upgrade your life! #ad #manscapedpodIn this week’s episode we are joined by lovely guest Chanelle Gallant, who has been a sex worker rights activist for 20 years. We begin the episode by hearing how Chanelle got into sex work activism, and why sex work activism is so important, not just for sex workers but for wider society too (hint— sex workers rights are basic human rights!)We get deep into w...
2022-04-0558 minSextrasIs My Attraction Normal?In this episode we talk about attraction and the way we experience it. There are different types of attraction, and different people experience attraction differently, so discuss why that might be and how we’ve reacted to our attraction.To start, we asked how our listeners in a poll, ‘How are you attracted to people? Do you ten to like people straight away and develop crushes easily, or do you have to get to know someone first for that attraction to grow?’ Our followers were split down the middle, just like us. Some shared some of their attrac...
2022-03-2950 minSextrasWhy Learn Your Attachment Style?In this episode we talk all about attachment styles from how to know your attachment style, to how attachment styles effect relationships, to some tips to change your attachment style. Obviously we are not experts, but we do know a fair bit about attachment styles from our own experience (plus we’ve done a lotttt of research).We begin the episode by breaking down insecure attachment styles: Maria tells us about what an anxious attachment style is, and Honey tells us about what an avoidant attachment style is (hint: those are each of their attachment styles).We...
2022-03-221h 03SextrasBody Hair Is NormalFrom before puberty, before we grow our first armpit hair, leg hair, pubic hair, women are raised to understand that this should all be removed. This week we sit down to question why, to point to the ways in which we’ve been taught to have shame about our bodies and its hair, and really examine the ways in which these messages of control have impacted us.We begin by hearing some of the messages our listeners heard about pubes and body hair growing up, (essentially to ‘shave’, that the hair is ‘bad and should be removed’...
2022-03-1554 minSextrasTaking It Day By Day For 11 Years Together (with Dee)This week we’re talking to Dee about long term relationships. We went to school with Dee, and she’s been with her boyfriend for 11 years (since she was 15) so we ask her about the ins and outs of being in a long term relationship when young.We begin by hearing how she and her boyfriend met, or how they began dating, and later how Dee realised that she was in love and in it for the long run. We then ask about the pressures of being in a long term relationship in your teenage years and...
2022-03-081h 00SextrasFingers, Hands, Mouths and TonguesIn this episode we get deep into developing a philosophy for fingering and handjobs. We attempt to unpack whether handjobs are something any penis-owning person enjoys, or thinks someone else can do better than them, and try to understand their place in sex as a whole.We begin with some polls where we ask people with penises about their handjob preferences and people with vulvas about their fingering preferences (namely whether they prefer clitoral or penetrative fingering). Then, we move on to the different roles fingering and handjobs play in sex, and debate which is harder...
2022-03-0158 minSextrasBreak Up Lessons LearntThis week we’re talking all about the lessons learnt from breakups. When you’re going through a break up it can seem like it will never end, and you’ll most likely be in a place of thinking this is the most pain you’ve ever been in, but we promise once you get through that stage (and it will end!) you’ll be able to see all the things you learnt in both the relationship and the break up. We also cover what we think should happen in the aftermath of the break up, from whether you should fol...
2022-02-2259 minSextrasNon- Monogamy, Toxic Relationships & Jealousy with Rachel KrantzThis week we’re joined by journalist, and author of the memoir ‘Open,’ Rachel Krantz to talk all about open relationships, toxic relationships, bisexuality and jealousy.We begin the episode by hearing what inspired Rachel’s book— she was dating a non monogamous man, who gave her the freedom to explore an open relationship and who her relationship with later became toxic.We then move on to learning about the different types of open relationship- from having a primary partner to practicing relationship anarchy. Rachel tells us about how she dealt with jealousy in her first...
2022-02-151h 05SextrasPorn, Sexual Fantasies and WankingWhat do you think about when you masturbate? This week we’re talking all about watching porn and masturbating, or alternatively, imagining our sexual fantasies when we masturbate, as well as the ethics of watching porn.We begin the episode by asking our followers what they think about or watch when they masturbate, and if they remember the first time they masturbated. In true Sextras fashion, we look back at how our ideas about masturbating and porn were formed, from the first time we saw porn (whether by accident or on purpose) to not realising what we...
2022-02-081h 05SextrasMindful Masturbation + Sexual Meditation (with Sayra Player)This week we’re talking to our wonderful guest Sayra Player (Founder of Guided By Glow; actor; and writer) all about sexual meditation.For women, it can be difficult to find erotic content that turns you on, especially if you have a busy mind. Sayra founded Guided By Glow in an attempt to encourage women and couples to have mindful sex practices.In this episode, we ask what sexual meditation is, before diving into how meditation is so powerful for our lives as a whole, but particularly for our sex lives, when we ca...
2022-02-0136 minSextrasTo Date or Not To Date in Your 20sThis week we ask ourselves ‘should you date in your 20s?’ For some, getting deeper into our 20s means getting further into our long term relationships, and for others being single. We discuss whether there’s really a right way to live your twenties: single or dating.We begin the episode with a segment where we ask our followers whether they care more about freedom or finding love in their 20s; whether they’d rather meet the person they’re going to end up with now or live out the rest of their 20s single; and hear more...
2022-01-2546 minSextrasDressing For The Male GazeCan you escape the male gaze, even if you try? This week we discuss the dynamics of dressing for the male gaze, or attempting not to, and how it’s difficult to not dress for the male gaze, particularly when you’re dating men but also if you want to look or feel attractive at all. We touch on why the male gaze is harmful, beauty standards and how the male gaze has been repackaged through social media.We begin the episode with discussing terms we use to describe our appearance, unpacking the differences within them and...
2022-01-1850 minSextrasBody Confidence and Dating ft. AmeliaThis week we’re joined by our lovely friend Amelia, to discuss body confidence and dating.We begin the episode with a segment where we hear something our listeners like about their body, to get us into the mood of body positivity. Then, Amelia tells us about her experience of dating as a plus sized woman and dealing with body confidence. She explains that bigger women can sometimes be fetishised when dating, and that her body confidence issues in the past have come from dating people who haven’t appreciated her body or treated her kindly. This...
2022-01-1157 minSextrasReflecting On The New YearHappy New Year Sextras babies!!! We hope you had the most wonderful holiday celebrating with all your loved ones and wish you a wonderful 2022!We thought we’d do another New Year’s episode, continuing the tradition from our episode ‘Let’s Keep Trying In 2021’ last year, to reflect on everything we achieved in 2021 and what our goals are for the new year. We all had a tough year in 2021, so here’s to a better 2022, to being kinder to ourselves and spending more time with our loved ones.We begin the episode with a segme...
2022-01-0437 minSextrasHow BPD Affects Relationships, Identity and Queerness (ft.Kabir)This week we speak to our wonderful guest Kabir about their experience with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) and how BPD affects relationships. We also discuss being queer, how this relates to having BPD and what their experience was like growing up.We begin by hearing how BPD affects Kabir’s daily life, and what BPD feels like, before getting into how Kabir’s relationships have been formulated and impacted by having BPD and being queer. We hear a little bit about what dating with BPD has looked like for Kabir, and they tell us that casual dati...
2021-12-281h 15SextrasShould I Date Someone Older?This week we discuss everything related to age difference when dating, wondering if it’s ok to date someone older than you and establishing a rule about dating age differences at the end.We begin the episode by hearing how much older and younger our listeners would go when dating, and read out some moments where you’ve really noticed the age difference in your relationships.Then we move on to discussing our own experiences with dating people different ages to us- we discuss how young and old we’d date and sleep with...
2021-12-211h 00SextrasHow To Deal With STIs, Removing Stigma & Living With HerpesIn this episode we talk all about how to deal with STIs, from what to do if you get an STI, to how to treat them, to how to reduce STI stigma, to living with herpes.We begin the episode by discussing some polls about whether our followers think that STIs are a big deal, and the ways they protect themselves against STIs. Although many of you said you 'do your best' to protect against STIs, it seems as though people aren't getting tested as often as they should or having completely safe sex (which we get...
2021-12-141h 04SextrasA Guide To Using Dating Apps1:10-18:00 Segment: Your worst dating app stories18:15 Which apps we've used-- what dating apps are there? Different dating apps explained38:40 How to use dating apps well, how to improve dating app profile47:00 Starting conversations on dating apps, good opening lines on dating apps + good questions to ask.Welcome back to season 2 of Sextras! We're so excited to be back and can't wait for you to hear the episodes we have coming your way.This week we're talk all about dating apps. We've both...
2021-12-0752 minSextrasPre Season 2 Catch Up!!!! WE WILL BE BACK ON 7TH DECEMBER FOR SEASON 2 !!! But for now, enjoy a little bit of bonus content to catch up with us and what we've been up to in our sex and dating lives over the summer (and autumn!). After hyping up hot girl summer so much at the end of season 1, we had veryyy different experiences: Maria ticked a few things off her sexual bucket list before being launched into a (short) long distance relationship with her boyfriend, whereas Honey spent most of the summer recharging and trying to accept her herpes diagnosis...
2021-11-3026 minSextrasTrailer - Season 2ALL NEW EPISODES COMING FROM 7TH DECEMBERWe're back, and with more exciting stuff than ever! We've been away putting together a studio and figuring out how to record video so you can see our lovely faces here on Youtube, as well as planning really exciting episodes. Last season we covered a lot, from friends with benefits to long distance relationships, to how to find out what gives you pleasure, and in season 2 we are going to keep expanding on these, plus coming in with all new topics. Stay tuned for episodes about attachment styles, how...
2021-11-2302 minSextrasLooking Back On A Year Of SextrasFor the last time this season, and thus the last time for a while, we get together to talk about what's going on in our sex life and our relationships, and reflect on the ways the podcast has impacted us and our lives.We open with an introduction detailing the cruel reality of what it means to run a podcast sometimes: a LOT of technical difficulties. This season finale seemed like a perfect opportunity to give our listeners some behind the scenes of podcasting. Or at least our experience, of what it is like to start a...
2021-06-2245 minSextrasManaging Anxiety in Relationships with AzuraDo you suffer from anxiety? This week we're joined by our lovely friend, and psychology student, Azura to talk all about how to deal with anxiety in relationships and being non binary.We begin the episode with a segment where we hear some of our listeners' insecurities in their relationships; how they broke their mental health to their significant others in relationships and how partners have helped them manage their mental health in relationships. We also did a segment to see how many people experience mental illness or mental health problems (81%) and whether they'd prefer to date...
2021-06-151h 11SextrasTime to Get Back Out There!Ready to get back out there? So are we! It's been a long year filled with lockdown and endless covid-19 restrictions and we are well and truly ready for hot girl summer, especially now that we've graduated. This week we talk all about getting back out there after a breakup, or even just putting yourself out there after lockdown and lack of dating practice.We begin the episode with a poll where we ask if people struggle to put themselves out there- to which 54% of people said yes and 46% of people said no. We then asked for...
2021-06-0847 minSextrasFocus On ForeplayIn this episode we're talking all about foreplay! In light of Honey recently being single and noticing the amount of men on Tinder who claim that they 'don't do foreplay' in their bios, we thought this was a much needed episode to emphasis the fact that foreplay is very important. Listen in for foreplay tips and ideas for both people with vaginas and penises (ie. actually doing foreplay at all!!)We begin the episode with a poll where we asked men and people with penises whether they 'need' foreplay (86% said yes, to our surprise) and 97% of women...
2021-06-0141 minSextrasSexual Fantasies, Confessions, and Bad DatesWelcome to our first ever submissions only bonus episode! From confessions about sexual fantasies to real sex stories about our follower's sex experiences to pondering whether your vagina can get tighter when you haven't had sex in a while, we cover it all.We begin the episode by telling everyone about some goals we have set for our own sex lives, and what we want our sex lives to look like in the future. We then move on to reading the wonderful submissions you have sent us! If you sent us a submission check the time stamps...
2021-05-301h 01SextrasHow Do You Deal With Arguments?What are you like in an argument? This week we discuss conflict and arguing styles. From heated arguments to the smallest disagreements, arguing is never entirely pleasant, but there is a way to communicate effectively and to be mindful in an argument so that it's respectful and doesn't become hurtful.We begin the episode with a segment where we ask our followers what they're like in an argument and what their argument pet peeves are. We discuss certain things we find annoying in arguments, such as when people walk away from your or insult you during an...
2021-05-251h 09SextrasHow To Have Better Sex (ft. Da Kinky Kid)Do you wish you were having better sex? This week we're joined by Kinky (aka. DaKinkyKid)- sex coach and kink educator- to learn how to be having better sex.We begin the episode with a segment where we asked our followers what some sexual things they're scared to try are, and Kinky gives us all some advice about how to get a little kinky with your sex life, from how men can ask to have butt stuff done to them, to being spanked or experimenting with pain and pleasure.Then, Kinky tells us how...
2021-05-181h 04SextrasFinding The One For You (ft. Manny the Matchmaker)This week we're joined by Manny, past matchmaker and relationship coach to talk about finding the right person for you, based on what you want from a relationship and whether you have an alpha, beta, or omega personality.We begin the episode with two segments where we asked our listeners 'What are your dating pet peeves?,' including men paying for dates being normalised and awkward conversations before sex; and 'What's the most unbelievable or ridiculous thing someone has said or done to you on a date?,' including guys admitting they take their condoms with them...
2021-05-111h 09SextrasSex: Quantity or Quality?This week we're debating the hot issue of what makes better sex: quantity or quality?We begin the episode with a few polls where we asked 'Would you rather have ok sex every day or have really good sex once a week?' to which 95% said really good sex once a week; 'What makes someone a better fuck- to have lots of sex with different people or to have lots of sex with one person? to which 74% of people said lots of sex with one person; 'Does your partner's body count matter to you?' to which 87...
2021-05-0455 minSextrasWhat Is BSDM? (ft. Sir Ezra)In this episode we're joined by BDSM performer and educator Sir Ezra. He's the HeadMaster of the Leather/ BDSM household The House of Algos, and he's here to tell us all about the BDSM lifestyle, his career in BDSM and the BDSM community as a whole and how to introduce BDSM into your life. Listen in for an introduction to BDSMWe begin the episode with a segment where we hear about our listeners' kinks, from hentai to tentacle porn to bondage, and Sir Ezra teaches us the difference between a kink and a fetish. We then...
2021-04-2755 minSextrasBuying And Using Sex Toys (ft. Melba Toys)From dildos to vibrators to fleshlights to butt plugs: this week we're talking all about sex toys. We're joined by Mel, the founder of Melba Toys, to talk about how to talk about sex toys with your partner, whether you guys are into sex toys and if you use them with partners, and she tells us a bit about the sex toy industry.We begin the episode with some polls, where we asked our followers if they have ever bought a sex toy (72% of people said yes); if they've ever used a sex toy with a partner (69...
2021-04-2058 minSextrasThe Breakup ProcessWe hear time and time again, that in every relationship, you either get married or break up. That is to say, most of our relationships will ultimately end, and through another break up we must go.Inspired by Honey's real life events!! (i.e. she recently went through a break up), this week we sit down and discuss the whole breakup process. In our segment we asked you to tell us about your worst breakups, or any general stories you have of times that you have been broke up with or have broken up with someone. Someone...
2021-04-131h 16SextrasAm I in a Toxic Relationship? (ft. Yolanda)This week we are joined by the lovely Yolanda, the host of Speak On podcast, to talk about toxic relationships. (TW: emotional abuse, coercive behaviour and gaslighting.)We begin the episode by hearing the most toxic things that have been done to our listeners, including name calling and lying continuously. We discuss how often these behaviours go unnoticed, and might seem like not a big deal at the time, but build up over time to erode trust in your relationship.Yolanda then tells us her toxic relationship story. She tells us what a toxic relationship...
2021-04-061h 24SextrasEmbarrassing SexWe thought we would expose ourselves this week by sharing some of our less glamorous sex stories, all the embarrassing, the awkward and the weird things that have happened to us during sex.We thought it might be funny to reminisce on the weird, cringe things we have done during sex, (because everyone does embarrassing things when they first start having sex). We laugh about things now, that may have felt traumatic in the moment, like the time Maria forgot about her tampon one time during sex, or the time Honey threw up in front of everyone...
2021-03-3041 minSextrasTalking With My Mum (Pt.1)Ever wonder what other people's relationship is like with their mum? Now you can find out! This week we're joined by Honey's mum to discuss all things about their relationship and about raising a child on your own.We begin by asking what she thinks of us having a sex and relationship podcast. We then to move on to her sex education and what it was like talking about sex when she was growing up, as well as how this informed how she wanted to talk about sex and relationships with Honey.We then move...
2021-03-2357 minSextrasWomen Are TiredThere has been a lot in the news and on social media about sexual assault and sexual coercion in the past couple of weeks. Starting with the disappearance of Sarah Everard in London, where we're both from, women have been expressing their outrage at the lack of response from the government and the Metropolitan Police, as well as telling their stories online about the sexual harassment they experience on a daily basis.We wanted to share our thoughts about what has been happening, and tell our own stories of sexual coercion, which we know many women will...
2021-03-2033 minSextrasFriend To FriendWhat would life be like without friendship? This week we discuss the beauty of female friendships, as well as reflecting on our own friendship throughout the years; why friendship is important, and how female friendships are different to men and women being friends.We start the episode by hearing what our listeners favourite parts of their female friendships are. As it's Women's History Month we wanted to pay homage to our female friendships particularly, and we also hear moments that our listeners have felt closest to their friends. We then move on to reflecting why we're so...
2021-03-1650 minSextrasWomen Who Inspire UsIn honour of International Women's Day 2021 we thought we'd dedicate an entire episode to women who inspire us. We begin the episode by hearing who our listeners' female role models were growing up, and who their female role models are now.We then discuss how our role models have changed throughout the years, what role models' qualities are and why role models are important. There are so many inspiring women, and maybe we should not only choose role models who have overcome adversity, but also broaden our ideas of who are good role models and what role...
2021-03-0956 min
Speak On PodcastSpeak On: The Disaster That Is Sex Education Ft. Sextras PodcastYolanda speaks with Honey and Maria from the podcast 'Sextras' about all things sex education, RSE lessons and Zoella being booted off the curriculum.___________________Speak On is an event series, podcast and panel show that explores culture, society and wellbeing.Please rate, review, like, share and subscribe and connect to Speak On’s social media channels.Speak On Instagram: www.instagram.com/speakon_ | #SpeakOnPresented & Created by Yolanda Copes-Stepney: www.instagram.com/yokicsGuest: Sextras https://www.instagram.com/sextraspodcast/Producer: Abigail Weaver: www.instagram.com/_ab...
2021-03-031h 08SextrasFuck The PatriarchyA patriarchy is a system of society or government in which men hold the power and women are largely excluded from it. The bad news is, we live in a patriarchy. And what are the effects of the patriarchy? In this weeks segment we asked how the patriarchy affects your daily lives, from from being able to wear certain clothes, to being told to ‘smile more’, to being too scared to travel alone. We discuss how much we relate to a lot of daily occupancy of inequality, and how sad it is that we do.There are many...
2021-03-021h 17SextrasAre You Having A Dry Spell?So many people don't have a sex life at the moment. Around the world, lockdowns have left people unable to fulfil their sexual desires, and for many women this has meant they struggle to feel sexual at all.This week we discuss what it's like when you're in a sexual dry spell, hearing from our listeners about what the longest they've gone without sex is and how they broke the dry spell. We discuss how long is too long for us to go without sex, and what is considered a dry spell, deciding that it's different for...
2021-02-2332 minSextrasSaying No and Setting Boundaries with Morgan DomanThis week, Morgan Doman, a life and clarity coach joins us to talk about saying no, how people pleasing affects our lives and relationships and how to set healthy boundaries. Sometimes it is hard to know how to set a boundary, or even to know there is a boundary to set at all.Morgan talks us through some ways to go around setting boundaries, as we discuss some of the boundaries that you guys have set in the segment, or boundaries you want to set. We talk about physical boundaries, like being touched, or hugged without warning...
2021-02-161h 14SextrasBe My Valentine?For some people, Valentine's Day is overrated, simply an excuse to spend money and say 'I love you' for the sake of it. For other's, it's a day filled with magic, when love fills the air and it feels like we have all the time in the world to set aside for the people we love. On this week's episode, we talk about the things we love about Valentine's Day, like the fact it's a day completely set apart for love. But we also talk about the things we don't like, how a lot of pressure can build around...
2021-02-0933 minSextrasWhat Do Men Want? ft. Bing FraserThis week we're joined by Bing Fraser, who attempts to provide us with some insight into the male psyche.We begin the episode with some questions our listeners have for men, such as 'when does sex end?' and what sex feels like for a man. Bing explains the male anatomy to us and explains the best thing a girl can do is to have fun and be fun.We then move on to hearing how Bing came to be a sexual being. He tells us the story of how he got over his fear...
2021-02-021h 02SextrasWhat Gives You the Ick?In this week's episode we discuss a very curious phenomenon: the ick. Where does the ick come from? No one knows (although we theorise it might be a manifestation of your intuition telling you to get away from that person). Here on this podcast we're terrified of the ick and the power it holds over us. You can get the ick in a long-term relationship, or even when you're dating, and there's no knowing if if the ick will, or can, go away.We begin the episode by speculating how to describe the ick, and how it's...
2021-01-2652 minSextrasBeing Single Doesn't Suck with MaryThis week we have a lovely guest, Mary, joining us to talk all things mental health and being single in lockdown. We begin the episode by hearing from what our listeners think the best part of single life is.We then dive into Mary's experience with being single, and having never been in an established relationship at 21. Some people think being single is lonely, but we discuss how sometimes being single is better as you can do some self-reflection, focus on your mental health and discovering what you want from a relationship. Mary explains that, while she's sl...
2021-01-1956 minSextrasCan You Be Friends With Your Ex?In this week's episode we ask if you can be friends with your ex. We begin by hearing from some of our listeners' opinion on if exes can be friends, if they're friends with any of their exes, if they'd be okay with their significant other being friends with an ex, or if their significant other minds if they're friends with their ex.We then move on to explaining how we came to be friends with our exes, and what to do if your ex wants to stay friends and you don't. There are often so many...
2021-01-1244 minSextrasLet's Keep Trying in 2021Happy new year!!! If you're listening to this- congratulations on making it to 2021 baby- I can't believe we did it. Let's hope the new year brings the end of the pandemic and a lot lot more joy and freedom than 2020. We hope everyone had a wonderful holiday and celebrated new years safely, and you're all wrapped up at home working on your new year's resolutions.Even though starting the new year doesn't mean you have to set goals for yourself we think it's always important to be do some self reflection. It's easy to look back and...
2021-01-0535 minSextras2020 and Other Bad DreamsWe have finally made it to the final week of 2020. There is no beautiful, poetic, amazing way to bring up everything that has happened during 2020, and we by no means try to do that. We know that this year has brought challenges, pain, struggle in a way we have never in our lifetimes seen before, and in all of that, there is a lot of room for growth. Being quarantined and staying home for most of the year provided us, and people all over the world, with nothing but time to really think. Lockdown has forced people into really...
2020-12-2956 minSextrasAm I Bisexual?In this week's episode, we take you through our experience as bisexual girls. We talk about the first times we ever heard of the term 'bisexual' and how we first started identifying with it, or questioning our sexuality. The bisexual identity can be difficult to come to terms with because often you are left in a limbo, of not being 'straight enough', nor 'gay enough'. This can bring forward a lot of confusion, we share how we often have felt like impostors, how maybe we are just saying we like girls for attention, and similar internalised biphobic tendencies.
2020-12-2242 minSextrasPaying Attention To What You Want ft. Pup AnarchyWe're joined this week by the lovely Pup Anarchy (aka Amir) who talks to us about kinks and how to pay attention to what you really want, whether that's during sex or just in your day-to-day life.We begin with a segment where we hear what the kinkiest thing our listeners have ever done is, ranging from peeing on someone to smelling people's underwear. Amir then tells us about his job as a shaman, and how he found out what kinks he's into (spoiler...he's into puppy play). He tells us how his work and his sex...
2020-12-151h 19SextrasDo We Expect Too Much In Love?Why do we have such high expectations of our romantic partners and not of our friends? Do we just have a deeper connection with our significant others than with our friends or are our expectations setting us up for failure?In this episode we discuss whether expectations are good or bad, where they come from, and what they tell us about our relationship. We begin with our segment where we hear what our listeners expect from their significant others but not from their friends. We try to unpack how expectations have hurt or disappointed us, as well...
2020-12-081h 05SextrasFalling For Your FriendIn this episode we have a lovely guest, Matilda, telling us all about her fairy-tale-like experience with falling for her friend and moving to another country to be with him after spending only ten days as an 'item'. We begin the episode with a segment where we ask our listeners about their craziest one night stands, also sharing ours. Matilda then moves on to how she and her boyfriend met; how she realised she had feelings for him and what it was like when they first kissed. We discuss the changes in going from friends to lovers, and what...
2020-12-011h 02SextrasSanity, Love, and Covid-19The coronavirus pandemic has restructured the world as we knew it, with restrictions on who we can interact with safely, and how we can interact safely, many people have been pushed into a very strange kind of isolation. In the UK we're in the middle of our second lockdown, and more curfews and restrictions are being introduced worldwide every day. Not to mention all the people that have lost their lives or loved ones, and all the people that have lost their jobs. Life is always unpredictable, but we have never experienced unpredictability like this. There is so much...
2020-11-241h 16SextrasFamily MattersIt's normal to feel nervous about introducing your girlfriend or boyfriend to your family. Sometimes they don't get on, or your parents don't approve of the person you're dating, and sometimes you scare your partner by suggesting they should be introduced 'too soon'. But it doesn't necessarily have to be a big deal, even if your family (and your partner) are extremely important to you.We begin the episode with our segment where we ask you guys 'What's something you would hate for your significant other's family to know about you?,' agreeing it's probably not the be...
2020-11-1743 minSextrasHow Are Labels Restraining Our Sexual Freedom?This week we are joined by our good friend Miranda, who we talk to about the harm trying to fit into labels can have on your sexual and emotional freedom. We begin the episode by hearing about some of your sexual fantasies, from joining the mile high club to having your wrists and ankles tied to the bed. Miranda then tells us about her own experiences of sex and being labelled as sexual growing up, explaining how often young women can try to fulfil labels that are imposed on them. We try to unpack how sex can b...
2020-11-101h 02SextrasOur Sexual GenesisWhat are your first memories of hearing about sex?This week, we reminisce and examine the very first memories we have about sex, our attitudes around it and the things we were taught. We dive into the way our parents talked about sex, if they did at all, and the way we were initially taught what it was. Sex education is unfortunately lacking in many ways, and as we describe our experiences we definitely find some gaps in our knowledge, for example we wonder how we learnt what gay sex was and when we were first conscious...
2020-11-0350 minSextrasLove Or Money?The idea that money equals success surrounds us. Instagram models with huge mansions, endless closets and trips to the clearest blue waters all year round. That's become the epitome of success; of envy. But does money really make us happy?For our segment this week we asked our followers a series of questions revolving around how important money is in comparison to love. We sit down with our guest Theo Whitmore, who, in his 20s, thinks that we should prioritise money, even if that means sacrificing the promise of love. We discuss whether success really comes completely...
2020-10-271h 01SextrasAm I Difficult to Love?Everyone suffers in love sometimes, but what would love look like if either party were unaware of what makes them insufferable to be around? We think it's important to be aware of what makes you difficult, even if only occasionally, and who knows? Maybe you won't be quite so offended next time someone you love points out something you need to improve in yourself. It can never hurt to notice the small things about yourself that might bug a partner, and it's so easy to overlook these things if you're used to being alone. But you're not alone! We're...
2020-10-2058 minSextrasTrump v WomenIn light of the upcoming US presidential election, we welcome our first American guest, Alex Turner, a dear friend of Honey's and a passionate activist. To open the episode we play another game of Stereotypes, where we discuss your views on Americans, Republicans, and Democrats.Alex later breaks down how the voting system works in America and deconstructs why it's so important for everyone to get out and vote for Biden in the 2020 Presidential election. Alex informs us of the harsh truths about the impact of Trump's administration and the potential damage it could further have on...
2020-10-1355 minSextrasDoes Distance Make the Heart Grow Fonder?Long distance relationships can be hard. Nobody - or very few people - thinks to themselves wow! I would love to live far away from my partner and only be able to see them once in a while or maybe not even once in a while and our whole relationship will basically be on the phone. Yet, many people still find themselves embarking in long distance relationships because they’ve gone to university; they can’t move because of work; they can’t get a visa; or more recently because of whole-country lockdowns during the COVID-19 pandemic . As one...
2020-10-061h 09SextrasA Girl's Gotta CumIn the progression of your life, you may one day be confronted with The Elusive Female Orgasm. The likelihood is: you either have a vulva yourself, or will one day want to sleep with someone else who does. And yes, these two things sound kind of scary but we’re here to tell you that they’re really not. We open with a segment discussing some polls, in which we asked if people were having orgasms and whether that changed if they were with a partner. We break down why there might be an orgasm gender gap and how we c...
2020-09-2959 minSextrasThe Bi Girl Experience ft. ToriskingdomWe have the wonderful Tori joining us this week, and we dive deep into bi girl stereotypes during our segment. We break down the harmful effects of being seen as slutty, greedy, fake, ‘just hopping on a trend’ and how the ‘bi girl’ identity is so often invalidated. Tori shares her experience as a queer person joining and leaving the church, and the difficulties in coming out and finding one’s identity. To end the episode, Tori tells us about the reality of having a following on social media and the negativity she witnesses everyday, as well as giving us advice...
2020-09-221h 01SextrasConfidence is Sexy!Getting naked in front of someone can be pretty scary. So much so we end up spending the entire time thinking about whether we groomed our pubes to perfection rather than actually enjoying the sex itself. This week, we have a chat about the little pressures and insecurities that build up when in sexual situations, like whether your body looks good, or whether your vagina is ‘normal’. We talk about our personal struggles with finding confidence during sex and being able to feel sexy. In the segment, we mention when you guys feel your most sexy and acknowledge that feel...
2020-09-1555 minSextrasGaysplaining with WillUnfortunately, as women of the bisexual persuasion we are outsiders to and therefore unknowing of the inner workings of gay men. However, our beautiful guest William Taylor joined us this week to gaysplain his own experiences as a gay man. We break down stereotypes about gay men during the segment, is it true that gay men are all slutty? We then dive deep into the potential impact of these stereotypes, particularly exploring the school experience and the difficulties of coming out and being a minority, or feeling like you are in some way ‘missing out’. Will then gives us an i...
2020-09-081h 01SextrasYou Gotta Get With My FriendsFor the first time ever on Sextras, we recorded in the same room and had a chat about friendships and how they intertwine with your romantic relationships. We open with a segment in which we asked for your honest thoughts and opinions on your best friend’s significant other. With responses of concern, to dislike to jealousy, we explore the different obstacles you might face when dealing with your best friend and their significant other. When then dive deeper into our own experiences and consequent advice. Such as, establishing boundaries in what you share with your friends and assessing wh...
2020-09-0146 minSextrasWill You Take Me As I Am?We found ourselves in love with foreign men. That was mistake number one. We decided to embark on a relationship with said foreign men. Mistake number two. So how do we maintain our sanity when faced with innate differences that we overlooked when we were falling in love? In this episode we dive into the difficulties we encountered in our experience with dating American and French men. More specifically, we discuss Honey’s struggle in dealing with conflicting cultural norms, as well as Maria’s experience dealing with a language barrier. We also provide the positive outcomes of engaging in r...
2020-08-2540 minSextrasOn Loving YourselfWhy is it so easy to accept love from others yet so hard to find it in yourself? This week we talk about our struggles in learning to love our body, from societal pressures to fluctuating weight. We open up about wearing clothes that are too small in order to fit into a certain standard and how we have found a way to move away from that standard and use clothes to learn to love our bodies and express ourselves. We emphasise that physical appearance doesn’t determine your worth, as we are all multi-faceted beings. We dis...
2020-08-1857 minSextrasWAP- Wet and ProudWhat makes someone a slut? Here on Sextras we encourage slutty behaviour, and, that is to say, we encourage everyone to be sexually free and open. In this week’s segment we expose the sluttiest things you guys have done to remove some of the shame around the term ‘slut’. We then dive deep into a heated conversation where we try to dismantle slut shaming and explain why it’s harmful to be sex negative and have that opinion imposed on you.We touch on the hypocrisy of men constantly sexualising women, but then shaming them when they cla...
2020-08-1443 minSextrasF*ck, buddyThe concepts of ‘friends with benefits’ and ‘fuck buddies’ exist solely to make it easier, more accessible and more convenient for humans to have sex. Romantic relationships can often be emotionally taxing, whilst one night stands can be messy and frankly, you often have bad sex. Ergo: the fuck buddy. In this episode we talk about sleeping with your friends and how that is different from having a fuck buddy and why it's important to retain this distinction. We expose our past mistakes and bring up others to avoid, to hopefully prepare you to venture into an arrangement free from fee...
2020-08-0450 minSextrasSex (Mis)educationSadly, sex education in school is for the most part insufficient. It often brushes over important topics, such as female pleasure and queer sexuality, thus releasing us into the world with a very limited idea of what sex is and how to have it. We expose all the things you wish you knew about sex in our segment, from queefing to female orgasms. This week, we are joined by our first guests, Carlota Hayaux du Tilly and Ava Puttnam. They are two fifteen year olds entering the world of sex and relationships, and open up about where sex education...
2020-07-281h 32SextrasSex At UniFor incoming freshers, current university students, or anyone that wants a little insight into what first year at a U.K. university looks like. We expose what people’s general opinions are of sleeping with your flatmate and give tips on how to avoid it getting messy. We explore whether people are truly looking for sex or love at university and how to make clear what you're after. For most, this is the first time living away from home and having a sense of ‘freedom’, so we talk about how to not get too carried away and be safe yet st...
2020-07-2153 minSextrasSex, Love, and COVID-19What does the world of dating, sex and relationships look like in the midst of a pandemic? How are relationships affected when the world is called into quarantine and you may be forced into cohabitation or into a long distance relationship? We attempt to paint the picture of relationships in a COVID-19 climate in our segment asking How has quarantine affected your sex/love life moving forward? And discover we all want more sex, essentially. We also discover the ways quarantine has made us reassess what we want. We laugh about petty arguments in quarantine in our second segment...
2020-07-1457 minSextrasFalling in LoveThe period of falling in love can often be so intense that you might find yourself going to ridiculous extremes to make your love known. From writing a poetry anthology, to flying from country to country for a little more time with someone. In our game, How Far Is Too Far we read the wild things you’ve done for love and assess whether it is indeed too far. We attempt to get to the root of these grand gestures and dive deep into our experience of falling in love, and the difference between falling and being in love, an...
2020-07-071h 10SextrasFirstsThere’s always a first time for everything, so let’s talk about it. First times can be sloppy, not everyone has the candlelit-stare-into-each-other’s-eyes anecdote to last through the ages. For some, it may happen in an abandoned tennis court in the middle of the day, and that’s okay! We question the concept of virginity and what 'losing it’ means to us as two bisexual girls, share the lessons learnt in first relationships, and discuss the rush of first love. We dip our toe into other firsts: orgasm, one night stands, masturbating, kissing and share some of our person...
2020-06-3058 minSextrasTrailerIn Sextras, you’ll hear two best friends have honest conversations about sex and relationships, with all the issues that surround them. From sharing funny stories, to sex tips, to hard life lessons learnt, Honey Jane Wyatt and Maria paint a candid picture of relationships of all kinds when approaching and reaching adulthood. Episodes may include heavy discussion one second and cringe worthy confessions the next. If you’ve ever wanted to listen in on two girls talking about the details of their sex and love life, now’s your chance, you might even learn a thing or two. Instagram - @sex...
2020-06-2401 min