Shows
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastS2E7, Ketamine Therapy Series, Session Two.TwoAfter recording my last episode on session two, something shifted in a way I didn’t expect. In this episode, I share what happened during the integration that followed, the moment my “scared self” surfaced, the tension that rose between Kyle and me, and what it felt like to finally be held in the middle of grief I’ve carried for years.
I talk openly about fear, loss, and the layers of pain connected to my brother, my father, and my mother, and how this release felt different from anything I’ve experienced before. Instead of days of emotion...
2026-01-2824 minThe Nutcracker Syndrome podcastS2E6, Ketamine Therapy Series, Session TwoIn this second installment of my ketamine-assisted therapy series, I walk listeners through what my second session felt like from the moments leading up to the infusion to the psychological and emotional “downloads” that emerged once the ketamine took effect.
I begin by reflecting on how this session differed from my first, including subtle but meaningful changes in the pre-session environment and the clinical check-in process. I share the follow-up questions my care team asked based on what I experienced in the days between sessions.
This session also marked a dosage increase, moving from 45mg to 5...
2026-01-2242 minThe Nutcracker Syndrome podcastS2E5, Ketamine Therapy Series, Session OneIn this episode, I share my experience from the first session of my ketamine-assisted therapy journey. I walk listeners through what the session looked like from a nervous-system and emotional perspective—what surprised me, what felt challenging, and what I noticed in the hours and days that followed. This conversation is rooted in honest reflection and gentle processing, offering insight into what a first session can feel like for those navigating medical trauma, chronic illness, or the emotional weight of long-term care.
This episode is intended for educational and storytelling purposes only and does not replace professional me...
2026-01-191h 08The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastS2E4, Ketamine Therapy Series, IntroductionIn this episode, I introduce a new mini-series within The Nutcracker Syndrome Podcast focused on ketamine-assisted therapy and its role in navigating medical trauma, chronic illness, and the emotional weight of long-term health journeys. I share why I chose to explore this modality, what led me to begin my own therapeutic process, my goals with this therapy, and what listeners can expect throughout this series. This conversation is rooted in curiosity, compassion, and transparency, offering both personal reflection and educational context for those who may be considering or simply wanting to better understand ketamine-assisted therapy as part of a...
2026-01-1925 minThe Nutcracker Syndrome podcastS2E3: Caretaker Series with Shay & ClanceyI’m excited to continue sharing stories as part of our Caretaker Series, a space dedicated to expanding our understanding of the vital role social support systems play throughout the NCS journey.
In this episode, you’ll hear from Shay and Clancey as they share their lived experiences navigating the complex and often evolving dynamics of caregiving and support. Their conversation offers valuable insights into building and sustaining an effective support system, including the importance of well-organized medical documentation, establishing clear and consistent communication channels, and engaging in difficult but necessary discussions surrounding power of attorney and shar...
2026-01-041h 31The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastS2E2: Caretaker Series with Heather & DannyIn this episode, we kick off our Caretaker Series, which a true passion project created to better support those who take care of us. You’ll hear Heather and Danny’s story as they share how they worked to understand what was medically happening, how they navigated their NCS journey, and what helped them along the way.
They also offer meaningful insights into what supported them both as a couple and as individuals, ensuring that Heather received the care she needed while Danny, as a caretaker, was supported as well.
2026-01-041h 30The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastS2E1: Welcome to Season Two!In this episode, I offer a brief introduction to what you can expect this season, along with heartfelt gratitude to those who have been here since the very beginning, and to those who found their way here after receiving a difficult, life-altering diagnosis. I truly wish you all the very best as you navigate this journey.
I’m deeply grateful to be able to curate and share this information with you, and I’m excited for all that this season of the podcast will bring to our community. As always, if there are topics or episodes you’d like...
2026-01-0407 minThe Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP28, One Year Kidney Autotransplant Update!Happy one-year kidney autotransplant anniversary to me! It’s been a whirlwind of a year, and I wanted to take some time to share an honest update: the good, the hard, the healing, and the ongoing. In this episode, I reflect on what recovery has really looked like, what I’ve learned about my body, resilience, vulnerability, and community, and how this experience has reshaped my perspective on health, work, and life. Whether you’ve followed this journey from the beginning or are just tuning in, thank you for being here and for walking alongside me this past year.
2025-12-241h 06
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP27, Hernia Repair Surgery Post-Kidney AutotransplantHi, NCS friends! In this episode, I’m sharing my experience with developing an epigastric hernia after my kidney autotransplant. My hope is that this helps normalize the journey for those of you who may need additional surgeries after treating your NCS.I go into more detail about:When I first noticed the herniaHow I made the decision to move forward with surgeryThe conversations I wish I had with my surgical team beforehand to help reduce the traumatic impactIf you or your loved one has experienced a...
2025-12-0735 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP26, The Best vs. Worth In-Patient ExperienceHi, my NCS besties! In this episode, I’m sharing a side-by-side look at my best and worst in-patient experiences throughout my Nutcracker Syndrome medical journey. Ten months after my kidney autotransplant, I underwent a hernia repair surgery, which is an issue that developed as a result of my open-abdominal AT. To be clear, this was in no way due to any error by the incredible team at UWHealth in Madison, Wisconsin. Hernias are, unfortunately, a common risk following abdominal surgeries, especially open procedures. Mine appeared around five months post-op, and I eventually proceeded with the repair.Un...
2025-12-0748 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP25, We All Love to Hate InsuranceWelcome back! It's been a few month hiatus from a new recording as I have been busy with work + starting a new company, The COPE Center, which is short for The Center for Optimal Psychological Education in Injury & Rehabilitation. Give the site a visit + please know I have not forgotten about you all; I just needed some time to get my feet back under me!Now, for this episode, recorded on the doorstep of my next surgery, which is a hernia repair and endometriosis excision, I open up about one of the most universally frustrating parts of...
2025-10-2643 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP24: Where It All Began: The Early Days of Nutcracker Syndrome with Sheri SpainBuckle up and grab your popcorn! I am so stoked for this episode of the NCS podcast because we have an absolutely incredible guest joining us—a true advocate, pioneer, and fellow Nutcracker Syndrome patient. In this episode, Sheri Spain shares what it was like in the early days of getting diagnosed with Nutcracker Syndrome, navigating a medical world that barely recognized it, and fighting for answers, care, and change. Sheri's story is raw, real, and powerful—and it's one you won’t want to miss. I know I am so appreciative of her and the others in her era th...
2025-07-112h 22
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP23: Can Renal Angioplasty Help NCS? + What If Your Pelvic Pain Is Endometriosis?Welcome back to the NCS Podcast! In this episode, we’re learning from one of our own—Kat—as she shares key insights from her personal journey, including:Her second IVUS experience: what it was like being awake vs. fully sedated, the pros and cons of each approach, and the benefits of seeking a second opinion from Dr. Peter StratilWhy renal angioplasty can be a viable treatment option for NCS that many don't know aboutHow endometriosis, not May-Thurner Syndrome, was the main source of her pelvic painThe road to an...
2025-06-0654 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP22: Mast Cell Activation Syndrome + Vascular CompressionsWelcome back to the NCS Podcast! In this episode, we’re diving into a powerful and personal story from one of our own—Lilly. She shares her journey living with mast cell activation syndrome (MCAS) alongside vascular compressions—specifically May-Thurner Syndrome (MTS) and Nutcracker Syndrome (NCS).MCAS is a complex and often misunderstood condition, and for many in our community, it presents as a comorbidity that can make an already challenging path even harder. Lilly opens up about:The specific symptoms that led her to suspect something more was going onThe diagnostic proces...
2025-06-061h 14
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP21: The Marcaine TestIn this episode of the NCS Podcast, I'm joined by guest Kat Weissner to discuss her experience with the Marcaine test at UCHealth. We explore what the Marcaine test is, why someone might undergo this procedure, what to expect during the process, and important questions to ask your doctor to help ensure the test is effective for you. We cover a lot of ground in this conversation, and I hope it brings value to your NCS journey.If you have any questions or would like to share your own story, feel free to leave a comment below...
2025-05-301h 00
The Gill Athletics Track and Field Connections Podcast#37: Gill1918 presents Dr. Simone Erdner Part 2 "Dear Coach"• Dr. Simone Erdner's website: DearCoachBook.com• Free eBook download of Dear Coach • The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love by Bell Hooks***Welcome to Gill1918, the track & field coaching podcast powered by Gill Athletics. Since 1918, Gill has been dedicated to empowering coaches with innovative equipment—now, we're bringing elite coaching education straight to your ears.Our goal is to create the Ted Talks of track/field podcasts bringing the annual track clinic to your ears DAILY! Topics will include but are not limited...
2025-05-2826 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP20: Internal Family Systems Therapy with Dr. Brooke RundleThis episode is the third and final installment of our three-part series focused on mental game insights. In this episode, I take a deeper dive into my own mental health journey, specifically through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy—the primary modality that has helped me navigate the psychological challenges of living with a medical diagnosis.I’m also thrilled to introduce Dr. Brooke Rundle (she/they), a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor based in Colorado. Dr. Rundle brings deep experience with IFS and joins me to explain what IFS is, how it works, and why it c...
2025-05-2758 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP19: Mental Game Insights, Part TwoThis episode is part two of a three-part series focused on mental game insights. In it, I share practical interventions to help you mentally navigate the often-overwhelming experience of living with vascular compressions.The specific techniques I discuss include:Goal-Setting (2:55)Self-Talk (16:20)Relaxation (28:46)Imagery/Visualization (45:48)To support your mental journey, here are some helpful resources:Diaphragmatic Breathing DemonstrationPain Management Relaxation/ImageryHealing Relaxation/ImageryLoving-Kindness Meditation (Compassion)Although this podcast series is specifically centered on NCS, the...
2025-05-2754 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP18: Mental Game Insights, Part OneThis episode kicks off a three-part series focused on mental game insights. As a psychology professor, I’m setting the stage to help normalize your mental health journey through two psychological models of injury: the Three-Phase Model of Injury and the Stress-Injury Model. I’ve adapted these frameworks to relate specifically to our experiences with vascular compression.The Three-Phase Model of Injury breaks down our experiences into the following stages:Phase I: Reaction to InjuryPhase II: Reaction to RehabilitationPhase III: Reaction to Return to LifeThe Stress-Injury Model (discussed at timestamp 31:15) explores the various factors that...
2025-05-2745 min
The Gill Athletics Track and Field Connections Podcast#36: Gill1918 presents Dr. Simone Erdner Part 1 "Dear Coach"• Dr. Simone Erdner's website: DearCoachBook.com • Free eBook download of Dear Coach• The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love by Bell Hooks***Welcome to Gill1918, the track & field coaching podcast powered by Gill Athletics. Since 1918, Gill has been dedicated to empowering coaches with innovative equipment—now, we're bringing elite coaching education straight to your ears.Our goal is to create the Ted Talks of track/field podcasts bringing the annual track clinic to your ears DAILY! Topics will include but are not limited to covering key stra...
2025-05-2721 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP17: Medications that Helped My NCSWelcome back to the NCS podcast! In this episode, I share the list of medications that helped me get to the finish line, which was my kidney autotransplant. Below is the list of medications for those that need help with spelling (like myself!) along with the dosages prescribed to me. While I offer the list below, I provide a lot more detail in this episode regarding these medications, and how they helped me specifically. With that, and as a gentle reminder, this is my journey that I am sharing. I am aware that what worked for me might not...
2025-05-0828 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP16: Dental Health + Vascular CompressionsWelcome back to the NCS Podcast! In this episode, much like episode 14 where I explored the potential link between vascular compressions and hormone health, I’m taking a deeper dive into how these compressions might also impact our dental health.Personally, when my vascular symptoms first began—before we even knew they were vascular-related—I started to notice a decline in my dental health as well. Now that I’m on the other side of my kidney autotransplant, I’m starting to connect the dots. That major decline in my oral health was likely the result of several va...
2025-04-1422 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP15: Registered Dietitian Tracey Rupp Talks NCS & Kidney HealthWelcome back to the NCS Podcast! I’m super excited to share this episode with you—it features our very first guest on the show: Tracey Rupp, a Registered Dietitian who specializes in kidney health. And, I must say, you’re going to want to listen all the way through, because this episode is packed with valuable, practical information that I think will help all of us navigate the chaos of Nutcracker Syndrome a little more smoothly.Tracey is not only a longtime friend and colleague, but also someone who really did her homework when I invited her to...
2025-04-131h 21
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP14: Hormones + Vascular CompressionsWelcome back to the NCS podcast! This episode wasn't originally on the docket but after my hormone specialist appointment yesterday where we spoke more intimately about the relationship between hormones and endovascular, I felt it was a pertinent topic to discuss with you all. As a friendly reminder, nothing on this show, including this episode, is providing you with medical advice. Rather, I simply share my lived experience navigating the vascular compression space + some of the things I have learned from the conversations with various doctors. Dr. Kelle Oberle is my hormone specialist; she is wonderful. In...
2025-04-0945 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP13: Dear Radiologists...Welcome back to the NCS podcast. In this episode, I offer a very real + very justifiably feral reaction to some of my frustrations with radiologists as I have navigated the NCS landscape. I share my most recent run-ins with vague radiology report readings & overall want to start the conversation given that many others have reached out--in my social media ramblings--with similar frustrations. As always, you are welcome to share your lived experience in the comments + notes ways in which we can better advocate for ourselves in this space. Because I refuse to continue to just be a...
2025-04-0729 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP12: How to Support Someone with Nutcracker SyndromeWelcome back to the NCS podcast! I was stoked to get this episode request as it's such an important topic, which is why it's the longest episode yet. I not only share my lived experience with social support through my NCS process in this episode, but I also go full professor mode sharing the research regarding social support as it pertains to "injury", which, in this case, regards being diagnosed with and subsequently treated for NCS. As a friendly reminder, I am also a sport psychology professor. Prior to becoming a professor, I worked in an applied...
2025-04-071h 00
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP11: Medical Travel InformationWelcome back to the NCS podcast. In this episode, I want to provide some additional details on ways to ease the financial burden of what you are going through. For many, you have to travel to see a specialist, but rest assured! There are travel options for you that can help cut costs. I offer more details about each of the below option—things to know when navigating each organization—but I wanted to offer the links to their respective websites for your convenience: Flights:Angel Flights: https://angelflightwest.org/Angel MedFlights: https://angelmedflight.com/Lifeline Pilots: https://lifeli...
2025-04-0127 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP10: In-Patient & Post-Op RecommendationsWelcome back to the NCS podcast! In this episode, I dive deeper into how to prepare for your inpatient stay, covering important topics like visitor hours, the food menu, what to bring with you, and more. Toward the end of the episode, I also share a few personal insights—what proved helpful for me and things I wish I had considered after being discharged from the hospital.Please keep in mind that this is based on my own experience during my inpatient and post-op journey with UWHealth in Madison, WI. I encourage anyone with additional advice or ti...
2025-04-0146 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP9: The Nuclear Medicine ScanWelcome back to the NCS podcast! I want to thank everyone who has tuned in to listen to my ramblings for the first couple of episodes. This was the first request I received, which jogged my memory in that, "Yes! I did do a nuclear medicine scan, and I completely forgot to talk about it on this show". So here we are! Even more reason why I appreciate all the feedback/requests you all have provided me.In this episode, I will provide some details on the nuclear medicine scan. I discuss what it...
2025-03-3117 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP8: The Autotransplant Initial ConsultWelcome back to the NCS podcast! As an extension of episode 7, I wanted to zoom in on the initial consult I had with UWHealth in Madison, WI as this was a *F U L L* day of appointments/scans (9am - 3pm). As stated throughout all the episodes, I share my lived experience; thus, how the initial consult went for me isn't the same as how it goes for others. There are some that have other scans scheduled during their initial consult such as first-time and/or repeat venograms + the renal hilar block. While my initial consult might be...
2025-03-2824 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP7: The AutotransplantWelcome back to the NCS Podcast!In this episode, I take a deep dive into all things kidney autotransplant—the surgery I personally opted for. As of this recording, I’m three months post-op. My surgery took place on December 19, 2024, at UW Health in Madison, WI, with Drs. Foley and Phillips, with Dr. Foley as the primary surgeon on my case.In the first half of this episode, I break down what a kidney autotransplant is and why someone might choose this route. I also explore alternative surgical options for those who may not find tran...
2025-03-2650 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP6: The Renal Hilar BlockWelcome back to the NCS Podcast! We're continuing to build episode by episode, starting with my NCS diagnosis and now diving into the specific scans and procedures that led to my kidney autotransplant.In the previous episode (#5), I shared my lived experience with the venogram. In this episode, we take a deeper look into the renal hilar block (RHB). I discuss not only what the RHB is and why it's performed but also provide a detailed account of my experience—from start to finish.Along the way, I explore the subjective nature of the RHB an...
2025-03-2425 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP5: The VenogramWelcome back to the NCS podcast! In this episode, I take a deep dive into all things venogram. I’ll share key tips and considerations to keep in mind before your procedure, along with a firsthand walkthrough of what the day was like for me.My goal in sharing these details is to help ease any anxiety you might have about this step in the process. In my experience, this procedure was a walk in the park compared to others I’ve undergone on my NCS journey.As always, I’d love to hear your though...
2025-03-2324 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP4: What Questions to Ask Your DoctorsWelcome back to the NCS podcast! In this episode, we’ll dive into the important questions to ask your doctors to help you determine if they’re the right fit for you.Before we get into the heart of the discussion, we take a brief detour to talk about insurance—how your plan (or lack thereof) can impact not only the questions you ask but also whether you even have the flexibility to shop around for doctors. As you may already know, navigating the American medical system can be incredibly challenging.To help, I’ve created...
2025-03-2324 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP3: Who to See if You Have NCSWelcome back to the NCS Podcast!As many of you might already know, navigating the world of vascular compressions can feel like a joke—especially if you've been diagnosed with Nutcracker Syndrome. Out of my five-doctor team, only two even knew what NCS was. That’s exactly why I hope this podcast can provide some insight into the steps you can take to move from point A to point B on this journey.My own path began with my beloved GYN, Dr. Olga Muldoon, who referred me to an interventional radiologist. That’s where I was di...
2025-03-2224 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP2: My Nutcracker Syndrome journeyIn this episode of the Nutcracker Syndrome (NCS) Podcast, I take a deep dive into what Nutcracker Syndrome (NCS) is, breaking down the condition in a way that’s easy to understand. I share my personal journey with NCS—the challenges, the milestones, and everything in between. We’ll explore the common signs and symptoms that often go unrecognized, as well as the lesser-known aspects of this rare condition. From diagnosis to treatment options, and all the nitty-gritty details in between, this episode sheds light on what it’s really like to navigate life with NCS. Whether you’re p...
2025-03-2036 min
The Nutcracker Syndrome podcastEP1: IntroductionWelcome to the Nutcracker Syndrome (NCS) Podcast!I’m so glad you’re here. But if you’ve just been diagnosed, suspect you might have NCS, or are a loved one of someone navigating this condition, I also want to say—I’m sorry you have to be here. NCS is not an easy diagnosis, and my heart goes out to you. Sending you all a big hug as you embark on this journey.This quick episode will give you a glimpse of what to expect from this podcast. You'll get to know me a little bet...
2025-03-2005 min