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You're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsYou Deserve Support: Overcoming Mental Blocks to HealingYou’re not stuck because you’re lazy—you’re stuck because you were trained to put everyone else first. In this episode, I walk you through the mental blocks that keep cycle breakers paralyzed—especially the guilt that makes boundary-setting feel impossible. Plus, I’m sharing a one-time offer to get everything you need to finally break through—inside the Boundaries Bootcamp Bundle. Don’t miss this: it’s available through Tuesday at midnight.Click here to grab the Boundaries Bootcamp BundleWant access to archived episodes and bonus content?2025-07-2915 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsThe Hidden Codependency Behind Your Need to Over-ExplainDo you catch yourself writing paragraph-long texts just to say “no”?Do you feel the urge to explain every decision, anticipate every reaction, or soften your truth with a long-winded disclaimer?That’s not overthinking. That’s overexplaining—and it’s a trauma response.In this episode, we’re talking about the exhausting cycle of overexplaining yourself, especially if you grew up with a narcissistic or otherwise toxic parent. I’ll walk you through why it started, why it still feels so necessary, and how to start letting it go.You’ll...2025-07-2216 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsAre They Really Sorry? The Empty Apology TrapIs your toxic parent’s “I’m sorry” leaving you more confused than comforted? In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, we unpack why apologies from narcissistic or otherwise toxic parents rarely feel like closure—and often reopen old wounds.You’ll learn:The signs of a real apology (and what performative regret looks like)How to stop spiraling when they say “sorry” but nothing changesA mindset shift that will help you decide whether or not to forgiveIf you’ve ever thought “maybe I’m being too harsh…” this episode is the clarity you’ve been need...2025-07-1514 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsGrieving the Life You Deserved: Healing From a Toxic ParentIn this episode, I talk about the complicated grief that surfaces once we begin setting boundaries and creating distance from toxic, narcissistic, or emotionally immature parents.I share what it looked like in my own life— the emotional toll of being a parentified child, and why our healing journey often involves mourning the milestones we missed while we were just trying to survive.This conversation is especially for those who feel behind in life, who struggle with guilt for being sad about the past, or who just need to hear that it’s okay to grie...2025-07-0817 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsYou're Not Doomed: Escaping a Pattern of Dysfunctional RelationshipsBig news! The Confident Boundaries App is officially live—now available for free on iPhone and Android. Inside, you’ll get instant access to a curated starter bundle of some of my favorite episodes and articles to support your healing from family dysfunction.In today’s episode, we’re digging into a question I hear often from adult children of narcissistic parents or those with unmanaged BPD: “Why do I keep ending up in toxic relationships?”When you grow up with emotionally immature or abusive parents, you're taught to dismiss your gut, minimize your...2025-07-0117 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsThe Loneliness of Being the Cycle BreakerIf you’re breaking toxic cycles in a family marked by emotional immaturity, narcissism, or borderline traits, there’s something we don’t talk about enough: the profound loneliness that can come with healing.You’re not just setting boundaries—you’re stepping out of the role your family expected you to play. Maybe you were the peacekeeper, the fixer, the golden child, or the scapegoat. But once you stop playing by the unspoken rules, the system fights to pull you back in. What hurts the most is realizing your family often wants access to the old versi...2025-06-2416 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsBreaking Cycles Without Breaking YourselfHealing isn’t linear—especially when you’re the cycle breaker. In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, I’m pulling back the curtain on what real, sustainable healing looks like when you grew up with emotionally immature, narcissistic, or borderline parents.I share how becoming a therapist over a decade ago didn’t free me from my dysfunctional patterns—it magnified them. I was the classic parentified child turned overwhelmed helper: running myself into the ground trying to "fix" everything and help everyone. I talk about how I'm working on breaking toxic cycles right now and a...2025-06-1740 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsWhat If Protecting Yourself Is the Honest Thing to Do?Cycle breakers are often raised to believe that honesty = full disclosure and transparency… even when the other person has a history of weaponizing that honesty against them.In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, we’re digging into the messy middle between brutal honesty and self-abandonment—especially when it comes to dealing with parents who have borderline personality disorder (BPD) or narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).So many of us value being open and real because we didn’t get that growing up. But when it comes to setting boundaries with toxic parents, that same desire to...2025-06-1015 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsGuilt-Tripped Again? How Toxic Parents Keep You Under ControlIf you’ve ever felt a pit in your stomach after setting a boundary… or a wave of guilt for saying no to your parent’s last-minute demand… this episode is for you.Guilt has been weaponized in toxic families for generations—and if you grew up with a toxic parent or narcissistic parent, chances are you’ve been conditioned to confuse manipulative guilt with a healthy conscience. But here’s the truth: that guilt you feel? It’s not because you’ve done something wrong. It’s because your parent taught you that their comfort matters more than your well...2025-06-0316 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsAre You Putting Out Fires or Breaking the Cycle?Let’s talk about the real work of breaking dysfunctional family cycles.If you're the adult child of a parent with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder, you probably know the drill: chaos explodes, you search frantically for tools to survive it… and then once things settle down, you convince yourself it's “not that bad.” Sound familiar?This episode is your reminder that healing isn’t just something you do in a crisis. In fact, the most transformative progress happens between the chaos—when things are calm, quiet, and deceptively “fine.”In this episode, I break down why...2025-05-2625 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsMy Parent Can't Really Be a Narcissist, Right?Do you question whether your parent actually is as toxic as they feel sometimes? Then this episode is for you.Today, I’m diving into why so many adult children of narcissistic or borderline parents minimize their trauma, second-guess themselves, and stay stuck in relationships that continue to harm them.We’ll talk about how those temporary “good moments” with your toxic parent aren’t proof that they’re safe—they’re part of the abuse cycle. Those calm stretches after explosive fights are what keep so many of us hooked, waiting for the parent we wish we had t...2025-05-2017 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic Parents"But They're Your Parent": Toxic Things People Say to Cycle BreakersSurviving (not thriving) Mother's Day weekend is what we're celebrating this week. Breaking cycles isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress. Your commitment to healing, despite few healthy examples, is powerful. Be gentle with yourself; your journey of growth deserves compassion, not criticism.Next we’re calling out the toxic phrases that gaslight, invalidate, and harm adult children of parents with BPD or NPD. You've probably heard, "But they're your parents, you should forgive them," or "When they die, you'll miss them." Unsurprisingly, I share how much I hate these comments and try to give you a chuckl...2025-05-1319 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsThe Gray Area: Understanding Low Contact with Toxic ParentsStuck between staying in a painful relationship with your toxic parent or going full no-contact? There is another option—low contact. In this episode, I break down what low contact actually looks like with a parent who has borderline or narcissistic personality disorder: surface-level conversations, strong boundaries, and emotional distance that protects your peace. I’ll share why this gray area can be the most sustainable choice for many adult children of emotionally immature or toxic parents—and how to know if it’s right for you.Links from this week's episode:Bonus episodes of You're N...2025-05-0624 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsThe Enabling Parent: Things Are Complicated with Your "Healthy" ParentHave you ever wondered why your "healthier" parent never stepped in to protect you? In this episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on the complex role of the enabling parent—one who may seem less toxic than the other but still plays a significant part in family dysfunction. Through their silence, excuse-making, and avoidance of conflict, the enabling parent often allows harmful patterns to persist. It’s easy to grow up seeing one parent as “the bad one” and the other as “the good one,” but the reality is far more painful and complicated.In this episode, I als...2025-04-2923 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsUntangling Codependency When You’re Always the Emotional FixerIf you grew up with a parent who had narcissistic or borderline personality disorder, codependency can sneak into your adult relationships without you even realizing it. What started as a necessary survival strategy—keeping the peace, reading the room, making yourself “easy”—turns into a lifelong pattern of people-pleasing, over-explaining, and walking on eggshells.In this episode, we unpack the everyday signs of codependent behavior: perfectionism to avoid criticism, guilt when setting boundaries, and the urge to fix other people’s emotions so you don’t have to feel the discomfort of their disappointment or anger.These aren...2025-04-2221 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsNavigating Emotions After Growing Up in a Dysfunctional FamilyEver been told to "sit with your emotions" but had no idea what that really means? If you grew up in a dysfunctional family, you’re not alone. In this episode, I break down this common advice into three practical steps that you can use, no matter how clueless you feel right now.Learn how to expand your emotional vocabulary, reconnect with your body’s responses, and process difficult emotions in compassionate ways. It’s never too late to develop emotional intelligence, even if you didn’t get these skills growing up.I also mention the "Bef...2025-04-1418 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsBeing the Scapegoat S*cks: Here's How to Break That CycleIn this episode, I’m diving into the complex and painful role of the scapegoat child in families with borderline or narcissistic parents. If you were always the one blamed for everything—while somehow also being expected to keep the peace—you’re not alone. I’m the scapegoat in my own family, and I know how exhausting and confusing it is.Families like this often use your emotional reactions to reinforce the idea that you’re the problem—giving them a convenient excuse to avoid their own accountability. This toxic pattern runs deep, but there are ways to step o...2025-04-0817 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsWant to Save Your Relationship with Your Toxic Parent? Try This.In this episode, we explore the difficult—but crucial—question: When is no-contact with a borderline or narcissistic parent necessary? This isn’t about pushing you toward cutting ties, but about helping you define the non-negotiable boundaries that protect both your emotional health and the relationship itself.Key Takeaways:✔️ Identifying deal breakers to clarify essential boundaries ✔️ Why thinking about no-contact isn’t giving up—it’s gaining clarity ✔️ How to set boundaries from a place of autonomy, not fear ✔️ Testing smaller boundaries before making drastic dec...2025-03-3116 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsBreaking the Cycle: Learning to Trust YourselfTrusting your own intuition can feel impossible when you grew up with a parent who has borderline or narcissistic personality disorder. Many of us were conditioned to override our gut feelings just to keep the peace—making it harder to make confident, healthy decisions as adults. But self-trust isn’t lost forever. With time, consistency, and the right tools, you can rebuild it and start making choices that truly align with your values.In this episode, I’m diving into: ✔ How BPD/NPD parents train us to ignore our instincts to keep them happy2025-03-2521 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsSigns You Need Better Boundaries with Your ParentStruggling to set boundaries with a parent who has borderline or narcissistic personality disorder? In this episode of You're Not Crazy, I break down five key signs that you need stronger boundaries—and share practical strategies to help you establish them.If any of these sound familiar, it’s time to rethink your boundaries: ✔️ You feel completely drained after interacting with your parent—or even just thinking about them. ✔️ You’re constantly walking on eggshells, afraid of triggering an emotional meltdown. ✔️ You keep getting sucked into their cha...2025-03-1814 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsOne Year of Confident Boundaries: What I've Learned About Coaching, Community, and GrowthAfter a year of running Confident Boundaries alongside my therapy practice, I’m reflecting on the journey—what worked, what didn’t, and how I’ve evolved my approach to supporting adult children of BPD and NPD parents.Expanding beyond therapy has allowed me to help more people through coaching, community, and this podcast. And, in this episode I share: ✔️ Why I created the Confident Boundaries umbrella (way before the online community)✔️ How I've been able to bridge the gap for those who couldn’t work with me in therapy ✔️ My initial resistance to coaching (and what ch...2025-03-1135 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsWhen Your Toxic Parent Becomes a Grandparent to Your KidsAs the adult children of a parent with narcissistic or borderline personality disorder, becoming parents ourselves brings up a whole new set of challenges—especially when it comes to navigating the grandparent-grandchild relationship. In this episode, I dive into the emotional complexities of setting boundaries with toxic parents while trying to break dysfunctional patterns for our kids.I’ll cover:→ How to handle difficult conversations with your children about going no contact→ The impact of a toxic grandparent’s behavior on your kids—and what to watch for→ Why your parent might not be th...2025-03-0422 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsAdulting is Hard: Breaking the Cycle & Filling in the GapsGrowing up with a parent who has borderline personality disorder (BPD) or narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) can have lasting emotional and practical impacts—some of which often go overlooked.In this episode, we dive into the challenges adult children of BPD/NPD parents face when it comes to "adulting" and why self-compassion is key.Listen to hear my thoughts about:✔️ How being raised by a BPD/NPD parent can impact how equipped you are to navigate the adult world✔️ Why many adult children struggle with adult...2025-02-2515 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsThe Good Mom vs. The Punishing Mom: Reflections on My Childhood with My Narcissist MotherGrowing up with a narcissistic or borderline parent means constantly navigating two versions of them—the loving, "good" parent and the punishing, unpredictable one. In this episode, I reflect on how caring for my sick daughter brought up memories of my own childhood—where empathy was absent, and love often came with conditions.I’ll explore how these experiences shaped my understanding of parenting, the emotional complexity of breaking the cycle, and the self-gaslighting that happens when you’ve been conditioned to question your own reality. If you’re working to parent differently than you were raised, or are wor...2025-02-1821 minYou're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic ParentsForgiveness Is Overrated—Now Acceptance? That’s Gold When You're Trying to Heal From a Parent with Narcissistic or Borderline Personality DisorderIf you've ever been told that you have to forgive in order to heal, I want you to know—that’s just not true. In this episode, I’m breaking down why forgiveness is overrated, especially when it comes to parents with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder (BPD/NPD). Instead of forcing yourself to forgive, what if you focused on acceptance instead? Because that’s where the real healing happens.In this episode, we’ll cover:✔️ Why forgiveness is often a trap we get stuck in✔️ The difference betwe...2025-02-1118 min