Shows
Grieving VoicesHoliday Grief Series: Why We Need To Look At the PastIn this final episode of the Holiday Grief Series, I explore the power of reflecting on our past, especially when dealing with grief during the holiday season. It's about facing those tough memories head-on, much like a buffalo charges through a storm to find peace faster. By confronting these feelings directly, we gain insight into ourselves and can make better choices for our future.Reflecting on history isn't just personal; it applies to society, too. Understanding past events helps us break negative cycles and create positive change. As we look back at 2024 and beyond, self-awareness becomes key...2024-12-1716 min
Grieving VoicesHoliday Grief Series | How To Deal With EstrangementIn the first episode of a four-part series on holiday grief, I discuss estrangement and its impact during the holiday season. Estrangement, a form of alienation within families, can arise from conflicts over values or unresolved trauma and affects relationships between parents, children, grandparents, siblings, and even extended family members. It often stems from disputes over values, lifestyles, past trauma, or unresolved issues.The holiday season is typically seen as a time for joy and togetherness with loved ones. However, for those experiencing estrangement, it can heighten feelings of loneliness and guilt. Societal pressure to...2024-11-2608 min
Grieving VoicesWhen You Unleash Your Heart, You Unleash Your LifeIn this week's episode, I share what I mean when I say at the end of every episode, "When you unleash your heart, you unleash your life." For me, it's more than a slogan; it's a belief. I navigated over 30 years of unresolved grief, resentment, and anger to achieve profound personal growth and self-realization. Healing is about unleashing one's heart to truly unleash one's life—a conviction born from addressing painful experiences and reframing and seeing those past experiences differently to benefit my evolution and growth. My initial skepticism could have stopped me from even giving the Gri...2024-10-1518 min
Grieving VoicesIs There a Wrong Way To Grieve?Inspired by recent discussions, this episode offers a new perspective that's been noodling around in my mind. In this week's episode, I explore the question: Is there a wrong way to grieve? Key Points:Societal Struggles with Grief: Despite popular belief that all grieving methods are valid, society often fails at effective coping—indicating a need to reevaluate our grief practices.Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms: People frequently turn to short-term harmful behaviors like substance abuse, gambling, or workaholism as an escape from grief rather than confronting their emotions head-on.2024-09-1708 min
Grieving VoicesAn Invitation for Truth and One Statement That Can Change EverythingUnlock the power of deep connections with one simple phrase: "Tell me more."Today, I explore how a single statement can transform relationships and foster emotional honesty. I also explore the impact of inviting others to share their stories, emphasizing the importance of being present and truly listening.Key Takeaways:- Discover why "Tell me more" is a game-changing invitation for deeper conversations.- Learn how to create safe spaces for emotional sharing without needing to fix or judge.- Understand the significance of connecting through genuine storytelling in your...2024-08-2709 min
Grieving VoicesEd Owens | A Veteran's Heart Cracked Open By Child LossThis week, I had the privilege of hearing from Ed Owens, vice president of the Grief Recovery Institute, in a deeply moving episode of the Grieving Voices podcast. As Vice President of the Grief Recovery Institute, Ed's narrative isn't just about loss; it’s about discovery—the kind that reshapes lives. From his military background to law enforcement tenure, he was schooled in emotional compartmentalization until life delivered its harshest lesson through his greatest loss: the death of his 3-year-old son, Ryan.This wasn’t just a turning point for Ed; it was an unraveling—a cataly...2024-07-3055 min
Grieving VoicesStepping Back To Move Forward: Lessons From SpiritFor this week's episode, I drew inspiration from an oracle deck by creator Colette Baron-Reid called Postcards from Spirit. Its message to you, my audience, and myself was the importance of stepping back to observe our thoughts and behaviors. This card pull reading inspired me to share my personal experience in decision-making as it relates to my business and how stepping away helped me gain clarity. The episode touches on human design, emotional authority, and the traps of fear-based decisions while offering encouragement.Key Points Discussed: Oracle Card Inspiration: Victoria begins by s...2024-04-0917 min
Grieving VoicesThe Guilt and Blame GameHow often have we heard or even played 'the guilt and blame game' in relationships? This emotional turmoil hinders healing and obscures the path to genuine connection.In today's episode, we dive deep into the complex themes of self-love, self-acceptance, and navigating loss. Healing isn't just about moving past grief; it involves embracing responsibility for our emotions, navigating forgiveness, and making peace internally—sometimes without confronting another soul. As a grief counselor, I've witnessed how loss challenges faith and spirituality but also offers profound lessons in nurturing them.Regret may whisper tales of what could ha...2024-02-2026 min
Grieving VoicesNational Grief Awareness Week | Facts, Stats, and Grief in the WorkplaceDecember 2nd-8th is National Grief Awareness Week. So, I thought I would do what I do best, and that is to bring attention to grief education. The better prepared and educated we are about grief, the more connected, empathetic, and patient we become. In this week's episode, I will share facts, statistics, and insights about grief. Some of what you'll hear has never been shared on the podcast. You'll learn staggering statistics that even caught me by surprise!Additionally, workplace grief is a common challenge within companies, and if you are a business owner...2023-12-0523 min
Grieving VoicesMaha Bodhi | Part II: The Pet Loss & The Surrender That Cracked Me OpenThis week's guest, Maha Bodhi, who previously appeared on the podcast in season 3, shares her experience of saying goodbye to her dog and the grief she experienced as a result. Having to choose what she felt was right for her pet versus hoping nature would take its course is a struggle many pet owners face when their pet reaches the end of their life. Pet loss is one of the most minimized losses. Those who don't experience pet loss, and many grievers, often see pets as being replaceable. Although Maha did attempt to replace Blake's loss with an...2023-10-2455 min
Grieving VoicesAmy Douglas | From Betrayal and Loss To Manifesting JoyHow much betrayal and loss can the heart take within less than two years? Today's guest shares how betrayal, loss, unsurmountable grief, and a decline in health catalyzed her personal growth. Amy chose to empower herself by getting a life coach and learning new tools that enabled her to recalibrate her life and move forward beyond the hurt, pain, and emotional hurricane she felt stuck in for too long. In this episode, we dabble into Amy's experience with Human Design, what she's learned about herself, and how Human Design became the permission slip...2023-10-1752 min
Grieving VoicesDr. Amirah Hall Part II | Quantum Energy Tools to Discover Your Divine DesignIn this Part II episode with the previous guest, Dr. Amirah Hall, we dig deeper into the energetics of our life experience. A near-death experience catapulted Amirah into a realm of energy work she had not anticipated finding herself doing. However, it's also probably what saved her from herself. As she states in this episode, we tend to stand in our way.Through a set of what she calls quantum energy tools, she developed a daily practice that is grounding and that initiates herself into the present moment. From a place of awareness, she shares...2023-09-2652 min
Grieving VoicesQ&A | Why Do I Struggle In Friendships and Find Parenting Unfulfilling?In today's episode, I share an a-ha realization with you: a question I've wondered about myself for the past eighteen years. I answer my own question in today's episode regarding relationships with friends, my kids, and myself. An important aspect of growth is self-awareness. Sometimes, we need to hear the right thing at the right time, unlocking an a-ha moment we've been waiting to receive. Those a-ha moments can shift our perspective or even possibly change the trajectory of our entire lives. The best way to put ourselves in the way of a-ha...2023-09-0523 min
Grieving VoicesPhoebe Leona: Where Are They Now? | Magic in the MessThis week, we catch up with the previous Grieving Voices guest, Phoebe Leona.I had received a newsletter from Phoebe providing some updates that, I felt, would be a great episode to talk about the potential/impending loss of something she had built with love, sweat, tears, and probably plenty of finances, too. Sometimes, to grow and evolve, we need to close one door so another may open. Little did I expect that as this episode goes live, I feel we could record a third episode - stay tuned...Back to this episode...2023-08-2255 min
Grieving VoicesQ&A | When Is It Too Soon To Start a New Relationship?This week's episode is about:Learning when you will be ready for a new relationship.Learning why awareness, understanding, and communication are vital to building relationships.I share what it was like when my mom started another relationship after my dad died.Do Grief Differently™️ and YouMap® support grievers in setting themselves up for success in future relationships by preparing their hearts for love again.The question of when it is too soon hinges on various factors, including the individual's grieving process, emotional readiness, and the extent of healing. There's no universally applicable timeline, as every...2023-08-0819 min
Grieving VoicesQ&A | My Son's Death is the Elephant in the RoomToday's Q&A is a great reminder for all of us that we express our grief differently and in our own timing. However, when emotions run high, and the loss seems unbearable, as is often the case with child loss, more grief will often add to the pain and heartbreak within family dynamics. We must remember that 75% of how we respond to life's challenges is learned by age three. By age fifteen, we've learned the remaining 25% of how to respond to life's challenges. These are impressionable ages, and the lessons in our youth are what we fall...2023-07-0415 min
Grieving VoicesPatti Herr: Where Are They Now? | Grief, Grace & Gratitude in MotherhoodPatti was my second guest on this podcast back in 2020. In our first recording, Patti shares more about what it was like being a young widow and later dealing with infertility with her now husband. In this follow-up episode, Patti shares some wonderful surprises God had in store for her in the last three years, including the impact working through her grief with me has had on her life and parenting in the time since she participated in one of my grief recovery group programs.Patti's story proves that there are rainbows after storm clouds...2023-06-2735 min
Grieving VoicesQ&A | The Grief of a Midlife CrisisDid you know that the term "midlife crisis" was coined by Elliot Jacques, a psychoanalyst who came up with the term in 1965 after noticing significant changes in one of his middle-aged clients? A lot has changed since 1965; the way we eat, how we eat, what we drive, societal views about marriage and children, etc. It's as if Mr. Jacques saw the writing on the wall back then. Fast-forward fifty-eight years, and the "midlife crisis" has become, in some respects, a societal joke. Hit forty, and you might have an affair, buy a sports car, or make some...2023-06-2026 min
Grieving VoicesTough Love | I Don't Have Time To Work On MyselfMay is Mental Health Awareness Month! Taking mental health seriously and prioritizing it is the job of the individual. Even if you find yourself in a situation where you are forced to prioritize your mental health, that doesn't necessarily equate to successful results. The effort you make, along with your intention, will create positive outcomes. We can allow ourselves to become bogged down by grief in our lives, or we can take small, actionable steps every day that move us forward and create momentum for healing. This is precisely what we do through my program2023-05-1615 min
Grieving VoicesQ&A | How Can I Best Help My Child In Their Grief?When tragedy strikes or challenging times knock on a family's door, the children involved can feel cast aside or as if they are an afterthought while the adults are experiencing their emotional crisis. However, it doesn't have to be that way. As adults become more knowledgeable about grief, learning new tools and new information, beliefs about grief and how to respond to it can change, too. As children's adult caretakers/caregivers connect to their own grief and apply new knowledge and tools, they also learn new (and healthier) ways to cope with grief and loss. ...2023-05-0916 min
Grieving VoicesQ&A | Is There Such a Thing as Complicated Grief?Many grief terms have come about to describe grief: abbreviatedabsentanticipatorychroniccollectivecomplicateddistorted disenfranchisedinhibiteddelayedmaskednormalThe American Psychological Association describes complicated grief as grief that seems to deviate from what’s expected, interfering with the ability to function. Isn't that grief, in general? Doesn't grief completely flip a person's world and life upside down? Does the term complicated grief and the laundry list of others do anything to help someone move forward in their grief and loss? The simple answer is "no." I believe these terms, and others like them, only cause grievers to judge themselves and their response to lo...2023-04-1810 min
Grieving VoicesQ&A | Is Closure Possible?It happens often; we hear people say they want or need closure. We also hear it on crime shows and true crime documentaries, too. However, what feels more accurate, and what would be a more helpful expression of what those left behind genuinely desire? Listen to this quick Q&A on closure and discover why it's unhelpful and what would be a more accurate goal to aim for when grieving. Sudden or traumatic loss (or events) often leave people wanting closure. And that desire that may never be achieved, keeping someone grieving stuck in emotional...2023-03-2109 min
Grieving VoicesQ&A | Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People?The question on today's podcast is one I have heard a lot and one I've also asked myself if I'm being honest. It's normal and natural to ask ourselves questions like this, and it doesn't mean that you mean any ill will towards others. It also doesn't mean other people are "bad"; bad things should happen to them instead. I see this question as an expression of trying to make sense of tragedy or challenges. When looking at outside circumstances, when you see other people living their lives in such a way that puts them...2023-02-2809 min
Grieving VoicesQ&A | Why Am I Struggling More With My Spouse's Death Than My Parents' Death?In this first Q&A episode, Ruth asks why she's struggling more with her spouse's death than the death of her parents.In my response, I share a perspective you may find helpful when considering your losses. Whether you've been married for five, fifteen, or forty years, or your parents died when you were young or in your fifties, death may finalize the physical relationship; however, the emotional relationship carries on. I'd love to answer your question on the podcast. Submit your Q to my email at victoria@theunleashedheart.com with "Q for...2023-01-2408 min
Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Grief Over Family DynamicsWhat does family mean to you? Who makes up your family? Not only those you claim by blood but those you choose, who show up when life throws curveballs? There are reasons to grieve family; the family you wish you had and even the family you may wish you didn't have, too. We can't choose our family, but we have a say in their role in our lives. And, when a family is made up of less-than-loving relationships, we can even choose to fill the needs of our hearts by choosing to have people in...2022-12-2725 min
Grieving VoicesKevin Boon | The Masks We WearWhen you fill out your calendar, do you intentionally set time aside to reflect and for introspection? Probably not. Most of us don't do so. However, as Kevin shares in this episode, doing so for his grief has made all of the difference in his life. Kevin speaks to the cumulative losses of his career, his father, his mother, and subsequent divorce. He also shares the impact of having a small nuclear family and missing out on a larger, extended family community growing up. We often don't think about how our nuclear family of origin...2022-12-2044 min
Grieving VoicesGenesis Amaris Kemp | Caregiving, Covid, and Corporate GriefGrief is cumulative, and it's cumulatively negative. Every loss we experience stacks on top of those before it. For Genesis Amaris Kemp, attending funerals started becoming a regular occurrence. Add the loss of loved ones before the Covid pandemic (and during) to the loss of a job during the same timeframe, and it can be challenging to find solid footing. Additionally, learning, for the first time, how to advocate for a parent in the healthcare system posed its challenges during this same period. Genesis's father walked into a hospital with elevated blood sugar. Three days later, he...2022-12-1340 min
Grieving VoicesDan Goldberg | Finding the GloryWas your childhood filled with joy and surrounded by love and support? There may have been some challenging times for your parents or even for you, but what if you indeed did have the ideal life?Dan's childhood was amazing. So when grief hit home hard, and hard it did, he was ill-prepared. He had experienced the death of his grandparents, but even then, there was little discussion about death or grief. His parents did their best to shelter him and his siblings from the sorrows of life. So when his father was dying of...2022-12-061h 12
Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Be Your Own HeroWe are all going to die. However, none of us know when, although some may know how (as with a terminal illness). One thing we can do for ourselves and our loved ones, not knowing when our last day will come, is to prepare for it. We will spare our loved ones from making many complex (and conflicting) decisions. You can be your own hero and that of your loved ones by taking ownership of your life as you're living and in death. Being your own hero means that sometimes, it pays to take chances...2022-11-2222 min
Grieving VoicesTim Heale | Glass Half-Full Approach to LifeTim's grief was compounded by the loss of his best friend and then-wife within a year of each other. It's enough to send anyone into a tailspin as it did for Tim. He found himself at the lowest point in his life. Grief-stricken, he found solace in a bottle until a friend asked him if he thought he had been drinking too much. From then on, he considered his path and decided to change his approach to life. Love found him where he least expected it; in the arms of the widow of his deceased b...2022-11-151h 06
Grieving VoicesChristian de la Huerta | Awakening the Soul of PowerChristian is one of nine children born and raised in Cuba during turbulent times and in the Catholic faith. His parents instilled in him the importance of excelling and reading. These early lessons laid a foundation. However, those lessons also set the stage for a desire to escape and not be seen. Introversion and depression plagued his adolescence, as was his knowledge of being gay. With courage, he came out to his family. Christian speaks about this challenging time in his life and the ones that came to be in the future, including the recent...2022-10-181h 09
Grieving VoicesDru Jaeger + Victoria | The Grief + Alcohol ClubThis week's episode is a collaboration with my friend, Dru Jaeger, co-founder of Club Soda and author of How to Be a Mindful Drinker: Cut Down, Take a Break, or Quit.Dru woke up one morning a happy child with two parents and went to bed that night without a mother. She died suddenly and unexpectedly of a massive brain hemorrhage. Within six months, his father would relocate their family to another country. Like many of us, Dru learned that you suppress it, distract yourself, keep yourself busy, and...2022-05-311h 07
Grieving VoicesKristin Sherry | Career Grief and The Gift of HindsightKristin Sherry is a bestselling and award-winning author, creator of YouMap®, a 2020 Career Innovator Award recipient, and she's also my mentor. Her brilliance is why I am a Certified YouMap® Coach. If you have been struggling with your life path, career, purpose, or what I like to call - a midlife unraveling, this episode is for you!Grief is the loss of hopes, dreams, and expectations. When it comes to what we spend most of our waking hours doing if we don't love it, don't utilize all of our skills, or aren't valued, grief is of...2022-01-1854 min
Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | We Don't Know What We Don't KnowWhen you find yourself the observer of a situation that brings up some emotional dis-ease for you, it may be helpful to say the following to yourself: “I don’t know what I don’t know.” This helps me to feel better when I have felt wronged in some way or when I find myself raising an eyebrow at a situation that may or may not involve me. Society isn’t short of judgment and criticism these days. I think there’s plenty of it to go around the world a few times. However, each of us can he...2021-09-2815 min
Grieving VoicesSirry Berndsen | The Spirit World Walks Among UsThere are psychics and then there are psychic mediums. Do you know the difference? Sirry shares the difference between the two in this week's episode. And, there's so much more that we cover in this conversation including:Her grief growing up, things she's experienced as an adult, and what her grief is today.What her thoughts are on the afterlife.Her thoughts on religion and mysticism of life as it relates to mediumship.Cultural differences in self-care when it comes to grief.What happens to people who do bad things after they die?Her experience being a...2021-09-211h 27
Grieving VoicesKristjana Hillberg | A Mother's Heartache & SacrificeAs a parent, if you had to choose between your child's best interest or what you personally wanted, you would likely choose what’s best for your child. However, what if that decision meant your child wouldn't be with you full-time? Kristjana was faced with a gut-wrenching decision that hung over her head for weeks on end until a moment of clarity struck her like a lightning bolt. But, it came with a whole lot of heartache and guilt. Not to mention one that made a lot of eyebrows go up and whispers swirl around her. 2021-09-141h 11
Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Struggle to StrengthThrough the challenges and struggles of life, we often find our strength and learn what we're capable of as we search for meaning in our pain. This episode shares two stories of the tenacity it took to dig deep, while also acknowledging the need for help and support and seeking it for themselves. Rachel battled with her husband for two years as he fought hard to beat his cancer, only to lose his fight to ALL (acute lymphoblastic leukemia) in the end. Eric battled the struggle of guilt after finding his daughter after s...2021-09-0730 min
Grieving VoicesEric Hodgdon | Opening the Door To a Parent's Worst NightmareIt was a great day; nothing seemed off with his daughter Zoi. They enjoyed a meal together; she headed to her room while he went downstairs to do some computer work. Sometime later, before heading to bed, he went to say goodnight to his beloved daughter, Zoi. The music she loved blaring from her stereo; he opened the door only to see an empty bed.What he discovered next changed his life forever - changed him forever. No parent should ever have to experience the death of a child. And, it feels like...2021-08-311h 08
Grieving VoicesRachel Engstrom | Life as a Cancer Wife, Widow, & Never a Mother-to-BeEight years following the death of her husband from acute lymphoblastic leukemia, Rachel reminisces on the love she lost and also the pain and lessons that came from his death as well. Rachel found purpose through her pain in writing about her experience, which later became her book, and also through cancer advocacy. In this episode, she shares the story of her husband's diagnosis and death two years later, as well as how she found her way to feeling better. On top of the loss of her spouse, she would later...2021-08-2451 min
Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Evolving with GriefGrief can either suck the life right out of you or, it can build you into the most compassionate heart for others who will look to you to lean on for support in their grief. They say grief shared is grief diminished, but many people find sharing their grief difficult. Some turn to writing as a way to express and soothe the soul like I had and like my guest, Faith shared, in episode 59. Or, they turn to others in support groups or friendships, only to be let down or disappointed, as my guest Sherrie was and...2021-08-1729 min
Grieving VoicesFaith Wilcox | One Year to Live; Forever Without My DaughterOn a day like many others, Faith had taken her daughter, Elizabeth, to a doctor’s appointment to investigate Elizabeth's knee pain. What was thought to be an innocent visit to the doctor, who suspected the issue was nothing serious, quickly turned the family’s life upside down. After an X-ray and further testing, they learned Elizabeth had Stage IV osteosarcoma, a rare bone cancer. They didn’t know it at the time, but Elizabeth had one year to live. The last three weeks of her life were on Hospice care. Faith would spend the next 1...2021-08-1038 min
Grieving VoicesSherrie Dunlevy | Infant Son Death & Pet Loss: A Story of Refusing to Lay & DecayAs a former news anchor, Sherrie Dunlevy delivered bad news on a daily basis. However, it was the news of a personal matter that would shatter her heart. Sherrie knew she would be delivering her son who would be born with complications and quickly swept away for medical care immediately after being delivered via cesarian. She and her husband would then spend the next 29 days holding their son until he passed away. The years that followed led her on a path of trying to understand why people abandon those who are grieving. And, set the...2021-08-0358 min
Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Does Everything Happen for a Reason?Does everything happen for a reason? How much of our lives is left to chance, and how much of it is a reflection of our choices? I explore these questions in this week's episode and more. Larry and Michelle shared their stories of love and loss and, although their stories of grief are vastly different, there are a few things incredibly similar in their stories: The willingness to love and be loved. Listen to this week's episode and reflect on the choices you've made, the chances you've taken, and the beautiful gifts that...2021-07-2720 min
Grieving VoicesMichelle St Jane | Widows Don't Sleep: Walking the Path of Cumulative LossMichelle St Jane is no stranger to grief, like many guests who have shared their stories. The traumatic experience of finding her grandfather deceased when she was 15 and the subsequent "Don't talk, don't tell" approach to grief laid the foundation for her in how she addressed her grief. She would later better understand the impact that her family of origin had on her life. Michelle left her family of origin at age 17 to travel and later found herself in love, married, and with children. However, her life would be flipped upside down when, at the...2021-07-1450 min
Grieving VoicesLarry Indiviglia | Choice and ChanceGrief makes grievers feel like they don't have choices. And, it can also be difficult to bring yourself to take a chance on something or someone. In this episode, I explore choice and chance with Larry. Larry shares his stories of loss, focusing on a short-term love that touched his heart and life deeply, leaving a lasting impact. He shares the wisdom that came from that love experience with Gayle in his book, 126 Days, 11 Minutes: Our Love Story . "I wrote this story as a tribute to Gayle's extraordinary courage and embrace of life. I encourage al...2021-07-1357 min
Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Preparing for Love & TragedyI share my favorite takeaways and reflections from Ep. 52 with Staci Bartley and Ep. 53 with Tina Ginn, exploring the importance of learning from the past and having the forethought for preparing for the future. Life is messy, and we can learn from our messes, and we can clean them up, too. If we could learn how to re-frame the challenges of our lives by asking ourselves better questions, I do believe we would spend far less time emotionally suffering. Staci, through early teen pregnancy and three marriages, she's learned this the hard way. And, perhaps that is...2021-07-0622 min
Grieving VoicesTina Ginn | Preparing for the WorstTina, like many grievers, has found her passion in her pain. What started out as a career as a financial advisor, where she was well-versed in risk management, morphed into helping others prepare for the worst in their lives. Having lived through a forest fire evacuation order, the quick decline of a dear friend's health and death due to cancer, a traumatic car accident which later led to losing her job, to a subsequent divorce and estrangement with her children, Tina has learned the importance of connection and preparedness. She brings her passion for helping...2021-06-2953 min
Grieving VoicesStaci Bartley | Broken Hearts & Broken DreamsFrom the age of 16, Staci Bartley was in the Relationship School of Hard Knox. She found herself pregnant at the age of 16. And, to do the "responsible" thing, she and her then-boyfriend (21 at the time) decided they would get married. A year later, she would end up a divorced single mother. However, at 21, she would expect a second child with a new man in her life, and, together, they decided to get married.It would take a lot of heartbreak and breaking down to recognize that the effort to attain the perfect family and life contained within...2021-06-221h 10
Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Finding Purpose & Turning the PageWe often find our purpose through our pain. Or are lead to our purpose through our pain. Either way, there's often a strong, deep desire to find meaning through the terrible life experiences we've gone through.I'm no exception to that, and many of my guests aren't either. Darren created AfterCloud, a "life-tech" app for capturing life's most precious moments and memories to make it both easy to do so, and in the process, create a legacy. It's also used in music therapy and has a lot of potential for many different types of scenarios. I could...2021-06-1536 min
Grieving VoicesArielle Arbushites | Widowed By Suicide at 29 & 3x Not a MotherArielle wasn't a newcomer to grief and loss by the time her husband decided to take his own life when she was only 29.She shares the highs, lows, and fears of navigating all of the unknowns and changes that came with losing her beloved, Rick. She wondered if she would ever love again, and because she and Rick couldn't have children together, she then had to face the possibility that she would never become a mother. Would she meet someone who would want to have children? Would she meet someone while she's still young enough to begin...2021-06-081h 03
Grieving VoicesDarren Evans | Loss and LegacyIn this episode, Darren shares how loss (and his son) inspired him to create a way to capture life's most precious moments, support others through caregiving and loving gestures, and leave a legacy for future generations. After Cloud is, as Darren calls it, a life-tech app; for sharing what needs to be said, capturing what you never want to forget, and connecting with loved ones in a way that is both easy and joy-filled. Through his losses, which include his older brother as a kid, and his father to cancer, and his mother-in-law to Lewy...2021-06-0155 min
Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Intuition & Pulling the WeedsWe come into this world knowing how to grieve. We naturally know how to express ourselves to get our needs met. Then life happens, along with generational teaching that creates the perfect storm for adult issues. So much of what is wrong in our lives, as adults, can be traced back to our childhoods. That goes for possible health concerns, as well as our mental, emotional, and spiritual health. Adulthood is a childhood re-enactment. And, considering that research suggests that our brains develop in response to the environment in which we are raised or in...2021-05-2528 min
Grieving VoicesCrystal Partney | Finding Hope After the Loss of Her Sister By SuicideCrystal shares the impact of losing her sister by suicide and the process of working through the grief that led her to start not one but two businesses in honor of her sister. What you will learn, though, through Crystal's episode, is that the loss of her sister was not the first. It was actually one of three within a short period of time. And, if there's one thing that I've learned through the work that I do and conversations for this podcast, it's that grief isn't a one-and-done experience. We often have many losses or grief-causing...2021-05-1853 min
Grieving VoicesRachel Pozzesi | The Grief & Impact of Chronic IllnessRachel was living the good life; valedictorian and class princess, great friends, travel enthusiast, and living her best twenties life. That is until life became not so good.Her body began to deteriorate and, she didn't know what was happening or why. And, it would take several years, fourteen different doctors, and a diagnosis of Hashimoto's, mold biotoxin illness, chronic Lyme disease, endometriosis, and mast cell activation syndrome before life would get better.Rachel shares the rollercoaster of ups and downs of living with chronic illness as a young adult, not to mention other losses...2021-05-111h 33
Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Holistic Healing Is PossibleI get really fired up when a podcast guest shares their story of, essentially, their emotional pain being dismissed. Instead of their pain being addressed when seeking help, their symptoms are "addressed." If misguided white coats started to flip that around, and look at the bigger picture and set aside the big pharma kickbacks, and become patient-centered, we'd maybe be in a less dire situation when it comes to mental health in the U.S. than we are today. Both Brianne and Jordan ended up finding holistic means of addressing their grief and trauma. And...2021-05-0433 min
Grieving VoicesJordan Brodie | Growing Up Gay, CODA & With AddictionJordan grew up knowing he was different. And, it was in that knowing where he could be himself with his loving, supportive father. However, in the outside world, he navigated the harsh reality of mean kids. Aside from his sexuality, growing up as a child of a deaf adult (CODA) also felt like a dirty little secret. What happened, as Jordan grew, is years of trying to deal with being put in a special class for kids with high intelligence, and in middle school, he found himself drinking and starting to experiment with drugs. This...2021-04-271h 00
Grieving VoicesBrianne Davis | Secrets, Sex & Love AddictionActress, Podcaster, and Author, Brianne Davis shares, for the first time, about the loss of who she once was. Brianne has come to terms, with the help of therapy and the 12-step program for sex and love addiction, to understand the depths and impact of being sexually abused as a child. And, how that experience, along with early exposure to what she believed love was impacted her well into adulthood. She would find herself choosing a profession where she could blend into the roles of another person within a script, which was fitting since she...2021-04-2043 minGrieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Life, Death, & LegacyTalking about end-of-life is never easy. And, receiving a terminal diagnosis (with a prognosis full of unknowns), is nowhere near easy either. I reflect on what my guests, Dr. Chris Kerr, author of "Death Is But a Dream," TEDx Speaker, and researcher of end-of-life experiences of terminal patients and 17-year metastatic breast cancer survivor, Anne Jacobs, shared with and taught me. I have flipped how I feel about end-of-life experience and what I hope my end-of-days are like based on my training as an End-of-Life Doula and my conversation with Dr. Kerr. Anne...2021-04-1341 min
Grieving VoicesAnne Jacobs | The Road Less Traveled: 17 Years With Triple Positive Metastatic Breast CancerAnne is, what is called in the metastatic breast cancer world, an "outlier." She's lived with triple positive metastatic breast cancer for seventeen years. And, for the past seventeen years, she's gone to sleep and woken up, not knowing when the other shoe will drop, and being out of treatment options. What does this do to the psyche of the human mind? How does one even begin to comprehend the weight of this diagnosis and prognosis? So many unknowns and what if's...the overwhelm and weight of it all...I can't even imagine. And, if yo...2021-04-062h 11
Grieving VoicesDr. Chris Kerr | Death Is But a Dream: End-of-Life ExperiencesThis episode is a must-listen for anyone who is facing terminal illness right now. Whether you are a caregiver or a patient, Dr. Chris Kerr's wisdom may help you feel empowered in how you address the end-of-life experience. Dr. Kerr's work has focused on affirming that end-of-life experiences are real and how the medicalization of the end-of-life process hinders one's ability to have "a good death" and also impacts the family who will be left behind. Dr. Kerr's message is impactful because the extensive research he's conducted over the past 10+ years has created...2021-03-3056 minGrieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Coming Home To OurselvesGenerational learning and ancestral trauma run deep in families. It's not even something I gave much thought to before becoming an Advanced Certified Grief Recovery Specialist. In episode 37, Angela shared how the lessons her mom was taught were passed down generations, impacting her life ten-fold. It takes courage to break the cycle of generational learning because it takes action and deep, internal work to address it. In this week's episode, I talk more about my takeaways and reflections from Angela's episode and also from Shandra's episode, where she shared about her memory loss. 2021-03-2334 min
Grieving VoicesShandra Shultz | Who Am I?What would it be like to get into an accident and walk away not knowing who you are?Shandra shares her experience of what it is like to see her daughter and loved ones and not know them. She found herself living a "half-life" as she called it. However, this accident and memory loss occurred following many other loss experiences. She shares that, while in high school, she found herself down the path of experimenting with drugs and alcohol. When she was 21, her father passed away from cancer. Fortunately, she found a way t...2021-03-161h 16
Grieving VoicesAngela Williams | Abused by My Mother, Homeless, & Heroin Addict to Ph.D.Based on the experiences she had in the first decade of her life, Angela was destined for a life of struggle, and, as her mom declared - die with a needle in her arm by the time she was 16. This prophecy nearly came true more than once. Instead, she got her Ph.D.. A life of trauma, physical, emotional, and sexual abuse by her mother led to early motherhood, heroin addiction, looking for love in all the wrong places, and losing her son to her own mother who put him in foster care. It would take over...2021-03-091h 28Grieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | The Evolution & Ripples of Hope & GriefIn this episode, I dig more into the topic of faith and spirituality that Lizzy and I touched on in her episode. Communication and support were a huge influence on her grief, whereas, I share how my experienced differed, despite both of us having the exact same losses which occurred in the same order, too. From Margo's episode, I talk about how hope greatly influences our outlook. Also, because it hasn't been talked about a whole lot yet on the podcast, I wanted to talk more about grief in the workplace that Margo and I discussed in h...2021-03-0233 min
Grieving VoicesMargo Fowkes | Lessons From My Beloved Son, JimmyIn this conversation, Margo shares the lessons she learned from her son, Jimmy, as he battled brain cancer for eight long years. His cancer took his life at the young age of 21. What is a little different about Margo's share is that, prior to her son's death, loved ones close to her who had passed had all lived long lives; close to or in their 100s. Her own father had passed away, also peacefully, in his home. The loss of her son jolted her beliefs around death and also taught her the importance of having ho...2021-02-231h 00
Grieving VoicesLizzy Flavin | Never FatherlessLizzy and I share a similar loss experience. So much so, we both experienced the death of a grandmother, father, then uncle - in the same order. We have a conversation about how those losses have shaped and shown up in her life, from her perspective of being in her early 20's. Also, being only ten years past the death of her father, she shares what's helped her throughout her youth. The conversation also turns to spirituality and faith. Lizzy shares grief that she feels around the separateness that exists within faith communities. And, she...2021-02-1646 minGrieving VoicesTakeaways & Reflections | Resiliency vs Self-RelianceThrough childhood grief and trauma, we are greatly shaped and influenced by the experiences we go through well into adulthood. I reflect on Nicky's episode, where he shares what life was like growing up as a child of artificial insemination and growing up in an LGBTQ home. We talked a lot about personal growth and how growing up surrounded by diversity helped him be accepting of all people. Sandi's episode brought up how child sexual trauma can bring about intangible losses such as loss of trust, safety, and trust. Not to mention, a loss of...2021-02-0920 min