Shows
2025-05-091h 12
Western Promises185 Madison Chair Gardenhey check out this here: patreon.com/westernpromises (want to know why Beaumont died and is in hell now? want to hear an exclusive interview with Satan the devil himself? yeah, click that lil link playboy. It is finally here, the office chair episode. we lost one host, but gained a beautiful discussion of office chairs. I really dont want to say too much here, it is best to go in blind. So, with out further doodoo, uh, here you go. #rattlethecage
2025-04-111h 25
Western Promises184 Enter the Matrix, Queen?jive on this lil neo, up in my damn hands, i be havin two pills that are different like. one of them mugs will install a copy of Enter the Matrix onto your personal computer and configure all of the settings for optimal performance. Now this other pill, that will pink sock you. The choice is hella yours, blood. In all seriousness the economy is jacked the f up rn, fr fr. But did you know that most, if not all, economists recommend transferring most of your holdings into Western Promises Patreon subscriptions? its...
2025-04-041h 05
Western Promises183 Copyright Copywrongdespite requesting the exact opposite, we are being tread upon. the brightest fires are always stamped out the quickest. but not us. not western promises. join us, join the resistance by taking a [redacted] to [redacted] and [redacted] while he watches from the corner slowly jacking off. or join patreon.com/westernpromises and we will do the heavy lifting.
2025-03-281h 23
Western Promises180 Bethel Boyslet me set the scene: you are freshly 19 years old. you have dedicated your life to Jehovah, both privately in prayer, and publicly through baptism. you have pursued a life in service to God, and devote a large amout of your time to proselytizing. You have never seen an R rated movie, you dont listen to rap or heavy metal music, and Wii Sports is your favorite video game. You take the big step of applying to Bethel after talking with your parents and the elders. A few weeks pass and you get the wonderful news that you have...
2025-03-081h 05
Western Promises178 a penis doesnt listen to the opinion of ballswhat more is there to say. classic CLASSIC episode EPISODE this week. 2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2- hosts only ONLY just for tonightwhat are you waiting for kid? thje rest of your life is waiting
2025-02-201h 17
Western Promises177 Benin City is for LoversHappy valentines DAy everyone. Join us for a world tour around the world (tour) listening to nigerian evangelical radio stations for one, for two: an american guy on a radio station in Cape Town South Africa. the introduction of anti-kevin, a sick new variant. down, left, up, down, a, a, a, select to unlock this powerful fighter. In the age of artificial intelligence and AI, love is now quantifiable. relationships are algebra and we can be your abacus. if going on a date with the hottest girl in school is a perfectly toned ass...
2025-02-141h 08
Western Promises173 Lost in the Corporate Worldthis one is all about the curious incident of the dog in the night time. dont know what that is? heh, i didnt either kid. settle in, let us show you. youre one of us now. in this gang, we are brothers, bound by blood and honor. here give me a kiss, the way brother do. deep and hard. soft lips, hard tounge. bang your teeth in to mine, theyare fake, i can take it.
2025-01-191h 27
Western Promises171: Christmas Spooktacular 2024come one come all to experience the schizophrenic fever dream Resident Evil 1 Christmas mod with the fellas and like 10 of our dearest friends from the discord server. strap in for a nearly 3 hour festive wild ride and experience yuletide treats the likes of which you've never seen such as:
-batshit insane dialogue that has constantly shifting volume, will randomly switch to only one audio channel, cuts off before lines finish, is plagued with random noises in the background and is rife with DELIGHTFUL nonsensical british "humor"
-pretty good new music tbh
2024-12-252h 46
Western Promises170 can a computer spell ICUP?look folks, love them or hate them, computers are here to stay. from helping cashiers tally up how much money you owe to a five star military general determining just how many civilians he can kill and still get away with it, these electronic assistants are becoming commonplace in every industry. And while it seems like just yesterday, the ability to send an electronic Christmas card to your Nana was cutting edge, now we have computers that can be your boyfriend and girlfriend. Im talking about AI. Artificial Intelligence. thats right. on this episode we explain AI in explicit...
2024-12-201h 15
Western Promises168 [FRIENDSHIPCULTGANG]on:time
hosts:3
identity:stolen
lets get (castrate) this (these) money (boys with beautiful voices)
2024-12-131h 38
Western Promises167 A Spiritual Soundlook, we missed a week, sue Paris. Go into town, hire a lawyer, and file a lawsuit against Paris. That is what you should do.
This episode is all about virtual reality or #VR. that is the only topic and we are experts on it.
#gaming #gamingguys #guys #gaymers #socialism #communism #holdinghands
2024-12-061h 09
Western Promises166 Non-Fungible Jestsarcasm and jokes were often the bottle in which clinical depressives
sent out their most plangent screams for someone to care and help them. - roland the farter
stalker 2 is out now
kingdom come deliverance rules
never learn to read, never surrender
2024-11-221h 27
Western Promises165 The Roads are Triangleswhat you see is what you dont get. its a twist, a spin on a classic. an inversion,a clever deceit. youve been had, you have been bested by a crafty adversary. fear not, however, he has taken mercy on you. perhaps he has seen something in you worth cultivating. dont be so naive as to assume selflessness to be his motivation, surely he sees a way to further his own goals, but there is wisdom in understanding that this is just how the world works.
2024-11-151h 23
Western Promises164 Democracy Dies in DanknessThis is my fight song (hey)Take back my life song (hey)Prove I'm alright song (hey, ha)My power's turned on (hey)Starting right now, I'll be strong (hey)I'll play my fight song (hey)And I don't really care if nobody else believes (ha)'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me
2024-11-081h 42
Western Promises162 Dr Marioyo whats up playboy? friday? hell yeah. the weekend. time to relax. hey why dont you do something crazy? how bout you pick up your phone and call your like 3rd or 4th favorite friend? just call him out of the blue and talk. just TALK. you never know with these kinds of things.
on this episode we dive into the wonderful world of PLOUFF BOOKS. PLOUFF PLOUFF PLOUFF PLOUFF PLOUFF PLOUFF PLOUFF
2024-10-251h 22
Western Promises161 Aberration in the Heartland of Equestriayeah no my godbrother told me that if you pick kirby and set the cpu to ice climbers and select hyrule castle and leave the game on for 2 months you will unlock oppenheimer. yeah its true, and he is so powerful. you do not want to make him mad. if you pick him the master hand wont even fight you, he just runs away. what is he btw? some guy playing with toys? that seems to be what the intro video is implying. so you are just fighting some guys hand? George Washington Carver didnt invent peanut butter btw...
2024-10-181h 18
Western Promises158 Fistulaokay now im serious, subscribe to our patreon: patreon.com/westernpromises.com
oh boy we are so back. teratomas, fistulas, kris angel uterus freak, current events, ahmeds big day, Mohamed's Theorem, metal gear solid V, standing on business. this week all three boys are in it to win it and we can see that checkered flag. kept ya waiting huh? also i am on a work field trip and Paris is dealing with a mysterious water situation so we are both on airpods. honestly its is pretty good.
Please...
2024-09-271h 35
Western Promises155 Monster Rancherdo not tap the glass, dont touch the poo, look dont touch. everything i just said? NEWSFLASH: its been said before. But do you really understand? Either way listen up, tune in, sit down, and do the work. you ever heard of tool assisted speedrunning? you know Frodo Baggins? you think you know Greg? oh and im sure famous B too? w/e, get real.
2024-08-301h 05
Western Promises154 Big Beautiful Childrenlook, I know the podcast has been bad, okay? Paris is MIA, my mic broke, and Kevin is chinese. But we are fixing it. We are fixing everything. Paris's disney cruise is on its way back, i got a new mic and we are replacing Kevin with an indigenous queer AFAB Dominican undertale speedrunner. its looking up. its all going up. lets get it. lets get all of it. we can have it. we have nothing to lose but our chains. oh and if ur listening you orange fascist??? enjoy losing to a GIRL!
( ಠ ͜ʖರೃ)
2024-08-231h 30
Western Promises153 Who "Watches" the "Watchmen"look, we missed a week. i could give you excuses, i could tell you everything that is in my heart, i could spill the beans but It just happened. it happens. jewishcostalelite joins me this week to talk about watches.
2024-08-161h 44
Western Promises150 The Tight Hoursubscribe to our patreon to support rights
patreon.com/westernpromises
Ness hitting kirby with a baseball bat
the sound of teeth scraping against a cheap fork
manipulate
all about KINK. KINK
what would you do if your strongest desire was to remove your manhood? make an appointment? listen to this. its time.
2024-07-191h 07
2024-07-1605 min
Western Promises1-800-PROMISES #1: fun in the solar powered sunwow! an amazing job opportunity just lined up for one of the boys with some schizophrenic lunatic in florida running a scam solar business. will kevin pass the phone interview? will his r*tarded nephew make a mess during the orientation? does this guy have the capability of actually understanding what another human says? only one way to find out...
2024-07-0112 min
Western Promises148 To Me, U R A Queenpatreon.com/westernpromises for bonus episodes. ur not gonna wanna miss it. the bonus episode we did was really bad
last time i uploaded an episode I told myself that this time I would actually write a description of what we discuss but man i really really really dont want to do that. it seems like so much work. but imma be 100 with you, we talk mikey, updates in the mikey miles werlld. we also talk about see this is the problem, i literally do not remember anything we talked about. i wanted to...
2024-06-2858 min
Western Promises145 Fighting Men in Water 01patreon.com/westernpromises
okay, its incel time. okay now its royalty free sound effect time okay now its balldo time okay now its late episode time
2024-06-081h 172024-05-111h 11
Western Promises138 Chirpin on tha Beltwayup to 3 bonus episodes a month!?!?! subscribe to our patreon: patreon.com/westernpromises
computer, open lotus notes. computer, start new note. new line. dear computer, this week on my radio we talk about dropping it into third gear going 60 on the beltway and chirping the dang tires. end note.
computer, open secret diary file. new entry. dear computer, i am in love with the iranian woman who picks through the trash in front of the del taco. she carries herself with such dignity in spite of her disgusting body...
2024-04-191h 11
Western Promises136 Getting Head to the second powerbetter late than clever
patreon.com/westernpromises
look here is the episode. no intro, joined by LITR. we talk two headed girl marriage, india pakistan relations, spermworld, israel palestine, red dead redemption 2
listen to lifting in the ruins:https://open.spotify.com/show/3ffjUb7V8IJROheAj3HFtH?si=f32ee117d9d54eff
2024-04-071h 28Western Promisesunlocked wpp031 Edward Gay Thumbsthe impending eclipse fucked us up. got us all turned up and mixed around and goofed
unlocking a bonus episode this week from our patreon at patreon.com/westernpromises
2024-04-051h 11
Western Promises132 The Da Vinci Chodesupport the show for 3+ bonus episodes every single day(month) !!! patreon.com/westernpromises
IN THIS EPISODE WE TALK ABOUT:
Aella's birthday g@ngB@ng with an exclusive interview with the virgin that attended
Chris Brown's penish
Dune i think?
our fans *hands making heart emoji*
our enemies *lil purple devil guy emoji*
halo 2 and da masta chief
and so much more probably
2024-03-081h 15
Western Promises131 this is for you, melindathis week? oh youre talking about this week? well this week we kick it ooooold schooool style. just beaumont, just paris, just big big laughs.
hell divers 2, balatro, transracialism, autism, botulism, populism?
support the show for discord access and 3 to four bonus episodes a week. Youre gonna like the way you give us $5 a month, i guarantee it. patreon.com/westernpromises
2024-03-011h 12Western Promises*UNLOCKED* wpp 042 The Champagne of OpiatesBeaumont and Kevin are on their honeymoon and they didn't want to take their microphones
2024-02-231h 15
Western Promises129 The Call of the Noid//BEGIN LIE//
Limited time only, the next 20 people to subscribe to our patreon get a year free!
//END LIE//
Subscribe for bonus episodes every week patreon.com/westernpromises
ummm i paused my little sister for sale for this? let me get this straight: eat, game, repeat? Hold on, youre telling me mia khalifa has collected ALL of the dragon balls!?
2024-02-0950 min
Western Promises128 Reel Time with Bill GarSubscribe to our patreon for a bonus episode each week plus access to all urinal and stall shots patreon.com/westernpromises
In this episode we are joined by Guy to discuss the real history behind the hit movie 300, the super dark effed up world of palworld, we learn what an earthrocker is, how beer is brewed ethically by sluts, the FAA hiring scandal, and what piercings you need to remove before you have a baby.
Listen to Lifting in the Ruins: https://open.spotify.com/show/3ffjUb7V8IJROheAj3...
2024-02-021h 08
Western Promises126 Dragon Ball Z Bisupport show pls: patreon.com/westernpromises
weekly bonus episodes and lil guys
did you guys see the news? what happened over there? crazy stuff. insane. glad it is being taken care of though. and by who, even. really couldnt ask for a better team to do what it is that they are doing.
Also in my personal life that happened, and it really changed me. it changed me in specific ways that i understand and am learning to accept.
Right now it...
2024-01-191h 05
Western Promises124 Lunacidsuit Larrypronouns? in MY autistic first person dungeon crawler game? next youre gonna tell me they took away sobe and that beloved superstar rapper viper kidnapped a methhead and locked her in a garage with a piss soaked mattress and used diapers lying around everywhere
click here and kindly subscribe dear: https://www.patreon.com/westernpromises
also listen to our best friend: https://open.spotify.com/show/3ffjUb7V8IJROheAj3HFtH?si=e1b57a38f6544f22
2024-01-061h 00
Western PromisesThe G-Spot 003 Warhammer 40K Rogue BoglimOn this episode the mad lads discuss Cobra’s all time disaster stream, rogue trader, and whether or not meth makes your dick not work
2023-12-101h 02
Western Promises118 Happy Thanksgiving Againpatreon.com/westernpromises support the show and get bonus episodes each week and groomer discord access
happy thanksgiving everyone. fill up on turkey and cakes and figs and sweet breads. slide up to the table and dig into this gristle with me. really get in there. dig your canines in. let your salivia pour over it. we are in this together. together we can really put a dent into this. pull on the chain, bring the gristle hook closer to you. im so sorry to hear about your sister, that must be hard. take...
2023-11-241h 11
Western Promises116 Keep On Tuggin w/ TLC Tugger Ronwow what can we even say here. We are joined by the inventor of the TLC Tugger for this weeks Western Promises. We talk about the systematic mutilation of our nations men that is circumcision and also we get into toothbrush engineering. folks, you cannot miss this episode. I dont know how to tell you, if you dont listen to this you will actually die and you wont go to heaven. sorry pal, thems tha rulles.
if you want to listen to more, why dont you just go ahead and sub to our patreon...
2023-11-101h 23
Western Promises115 The Spear of Longinuslong ginus. im a positive that is how they say it in the show. someone please find me a clip of them saying it
bonus episodes? patreon.com/westernpromises
access to the best discord of all time? patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-11-031h 07
Western Promises111 There is an Earwig Under Alaskadont you find it funny how this always happens? you will be minding your own business, drinking a soft kombucha on the beach listening to banana pancakes and thinking "wow how could anything be better" when suddenly you are overcome with an impending sense of doom and deep embarassment. you feel it in your chest at first but then it starts to sink down into the pit of your stomach like a rotten baseball. did you really earn this life? have you done anything of value, ever? no, probably not. get back to work you worthless loser.
2023-10-061h 01
Western Promises107 They Put The Whole Damn Game In Spacepronouns? in my space video game? whats next? a lizzo mcdonalds meal? c'mon.
bro the west has fallen, just get in the car. we are going to crystal burger
also man what if you wanted like more of this show?
patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-09-081h 22
Western Promises104 The Episode Where We Clip the 1 Minute We Talked About Baldur's Gate So Kevin Gets a PAX Media BadgeHere's the scoop: We are NOT neglecting the podcast. The problem? Beaumont was killed in whatever bullshit hurricane baby ass rain earthquake he's complaining about, Paris got lost in a Bass Pro Shop, and Kevin sold his computer for 900 VHS tapes of Corky Romano (unopened). Good riddance, if you ask me, heh! Heh! Heh! Baldur's Gate sex% run
support us and love us and treat us right: https://www.patreon.com/westernpromises
support this fella too: https://www.patreon.com/user/membership?u=99035655
2023-08-221h 23Western Promises102 Donnie Darkodamn what if you wanted to listen to another hour of this? wow you think you could? fuck shit, wow woah. i really wonder if you could
patreon.com/westernpromises
bonus content regularly now, that is a western promise
2023-08-041h 00
Western Promises098 Dude, Where's My Paradise?SUPPORT SHOW PLS: patreon.com/westernpromises
I call him Don Raper actually because of how mean he is to women. he doesnt act towards them like i would. I would treat you so well. you would honestly get treated like a princess by me. You would never have to do dishes or clean sheets or things like that. I would do all of that. I would worship you. I would pause my game when you needed something from me, except dark souls (you cant pause it because it is basically online all the time...
2023-07-071h 16
Western Promises097 Tom Clancy's Phantom of the Ghost Gun or some fucking shitpatreon.com/westernpromises
In the heart-pounding military thriller "The Phantom of the Ghost Gun," a team of elite soldiers is thrust into a high-stakes black ops mission that will push them to their limits. As the River Oracle of Edo State grows dangerously close to unlocking the secret of immortality, their assignment becomes clear: they must eliminate this relentless adversary before he alters the course of history forever.
In the treacherous world of covert operations, where danger lurks at every turn, the team must confront their greatest challenge yet...
2023-06-301h 21
Western Promises096 Dire Dire Docksle sigh. a sad one today. it is both an honor and a great sadness that we were able to have the last correspondence with Titan, the doomed submarine that is lost or something. thank you to our special guest and please subscribe to our patreon to help support the billionaire's gooning stepson in these trying times. we will not donate any of the money but I would like to think our show would be a great comfort to him in between yellowy nuts. ͼ(ݓ_ݓ)ͽ
patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-06-231h 40
Western Promises094 The Mice Will Playwith the boss out of the office, Paris and Kevin debate the merits of honking your car horn in celebration, why paris HATES the term boomershooter, and how one epic prank went tragically wrong
these are called "jokes" "folks"... if you have a problem with us, take it up with our 5'2 senegalese manager named Gamecube. you can find him at https://www.patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-06-101h 16
Western Promises093 Big Trouble In Little IsraelStrap in for the debate event of the century. Young vs Old, West Coast vs Midwest, Israel vs China - Our very own Kevin stands up to the likes of Israellectuals and only me can decide who is the victor.
You 👏 are 👏 not 👏 gonna 👏 wanna 👏 miss 👏 this 👏 folks👏
Follow Israllectuals: instagram.com/israellectuals2
You liked it? yeah? well then support the show you bag a bones, you baby boy, you lard ass bitch
patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-06-021h 51
Western Promises088 Triple H IVFishtank.live, what is that? who is watching? is it okay? is it safe? are you safe?
Who the heck is stephen crowder? what? am you okay?
what is going on? am i?
patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-04-281h 19
Western Promises087 Mr. Zyklon Beanimagine supporting your favorite show and hanging out with us all the time in discord? wow david!
patreon.com/westernpromises
Mr bean reboot
Japan 2023
microplastics to autism pipeline
maniac porn
thug shaker gov leaks
wow david!
2023-04-211h 24
Western Promises086 Kevin's Chinese Adventurewell WHAT do ya know? beaumont and paris have left this miserable planet and only the chinese savant hero genius "kevin" is left to maintain it. lets have some fun..... (im going to end my life tomorrow)
heres a cool lil thing: https://www.patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-04-1444 min
Western Promises085 Beaumont's Sarin Gas Extravaganzabeaumont moves to japan to compete against the world's best custers revenge speedrunners. kevin's $5 webcam is still broke but it now allows everyone to see 5 seconds into the future. paris is in jail for selling rifles at a tj maxx. and you won't believe what happens next.
subscribe for cool stuff please we quit our jobs and took out our 401ks to pay for the funeral service for the cash app guy who got stabbed: https://www.patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-04-071h 12
Western Promises084 Drone Jamresident evil 4 remake
sxsw perhaps?
travis barker plane accident?
patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-03-311h 13
Western Promises083 Ozempic Fortnite TikTokhelp me i have sold my most average daughter into slavery to get more Vbucks for a better call saul skin
patreon.com/westernpromises
im on high doses of fake adderall and bathtub ozempic; i kiss you softly as the n64soundfont cover of where is my mind plays on travel tv dvd player strapped to the back headrest of a 2002 ford explorer with a noisy timing belt. in this moment we are forever
2023-03-241h 07
Western Promises082 Pressed Methturns out ive just been taking meth this whole time, who knew?
support us pls patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-03-171h 24
Western Promises081 LooksMaximuswhat do you want from,me
patreon.com/westernpromises for bonus episodes and video episodes please my wife's boyfriends children are starving for new heroclix
2023-03-101h 19
Western Promises080 Super PaddockLand w/memesofsaturnwe are joined by memes of saturn to discuss what REALLY happened in las vegas when that shooting happened, the next ince1 Sh*0ting, Long Beach California, those guys at the mall that try to sell you lotion, super mario kart, and a few other things.
Subscribe to our patreon for video episodes and bonus episodes:
patreon.com/westernpromises
Follow memesofsaturn on instagram:
instagram.com/thememesofsaturn
ALSO: we got some initial reports from our early listeners on the Western Promises femboy grooming discord s...
2023-03-031h 31
Western Promises078 iDoctorfolks i went to the idoctor
for video episodes and all other bonus content sub to the patreon: patreon.com/westernpromises
2023-02-171h 16
Western Promises077 MuffPrimeWHAT? NO MUG OF ALE FOR A WEARY TRAVELER FROM DISTANT CORHAGEN? I CAN REWARD YOU WELL FOR I AM OF NOBEL DECENT?
WHAT NO PATREON.COM/WESTERNPROMISES SUBSCRIPTION FOR WEARY PODCASTERS? WE CAN REWARD YOU WELL FOR I AM OF PRIMO BUSSY DECENT?
2023-02-101h 14
Western Promises075 AnTonyChase LaVeydespite zero interest or support from anyone Paris' School of Femboy Magik and Homosexual Witchcraft is now open. to enroll please get on the first available public transit option in your city and hold hands with the driver.
patreon.com/westernpromises to get access to the real spells
2023-01-271h 45
Western Promises074 House Squidsupport show pls 🤠
patreon.com/westernpromises
andrew callaghan apology
andrew tate ideology
squidward in the sheets
The anti-teacher show Paris talked about: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sold-a-story/id1649580473
2023-01-201h 30
Western Promises073 All Gas No Consentall proceeds from the patreon this month will go to the gas stove anti defamation league
patreon.com/westernpromises to support the show and get access to all bonus content and nude videos of paris dancing and holding hands with boys
we talk about the andrew callaghan allegations and have a secret special guest but more importantly death stranding
2023-01-131h 13
Western Promises072 First They Came for the Goonerssupport the show: patreon.com/westernpromises
🎶im a zoomer, im a groomer, im a midnight gooner🎶 - lyrics and composition by Paris.
Happy new year promises. this is going to be a good year. lets make this recession work for us
DO NOT, under ANY circumstances, enroll in Paris' magic school. first and only warning.
2023-01-061h 17
Western Promises071 Happy Chinese New YearSUPPORT THE SHOW: patreon.com/westernpromises
Happy New Year from the boys, we love you so much
2022-12-301h 14
Western Promises070 Merry Christmas with betaversepatreon.com/westernpromises
The boys from the betaverse podcast join us to wish all the freaks, the losers, the broken-hearted, the crippled, the stupid, the gay, the fat, the ugly, the stinky smelly, the grotesque, the Albanian, the christian, and the muslim a wonderful merry christmas and happy holidays.
listen to the betaverse here: https://open.spotify.com/show/7hJMETwpPjeC8gonyPYoXT?si=bNYzGUFIRp6bQUNUFdc01w
2022-12-231h 30
Western Promises069 Low T Virus w/ final_f0rmsupport the show :) patreon.com/westernpromises
we are joined by final_f0rm to talk resident evil, tank controls, the T virus, semen retention, pre rendered backgrounds, dead space, and so much more. follow final form on instagram: instagram.com/final_f0rm
2022-12-161h 20
Western Promises068 Caged Age Mindset (acting emo)patreon.com/westernpromises
penis enlargement
penis softening penis hardening penis socializing
welcome to the attitude era
time share increase ROI investments crypto currency blockchain la la land hand foot and mouth disease
baby shark baby shark baby shark baby shark baby shark we buy ugly houses
2022-12-091h 12
Western Promises067 CRISPR ChanPATREON.COM/WESTERNPROMISES
episode 67. what else can we say. elon musk bedside table, nick fuentes, jimmy kimmel, ye, using CRISPR to make your baby even more chinese, folks, what else is there, Jude Doyle, Cyberpunk, what else!?? i mean, wtf, the witcher??? TIM POOL????
2022-12-021h 27
Western Promises065 Goy Division /w israellectualsPART 1 :)
israellectuals hangs out IRL to talk elevator autists, Australian rock n roll, and what it means to be punk
follow israllectuals on instagram:
instagram.com/israllectuals2
for part 2 subscribe pls :)
patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-11-181h 03
Western Promises064 Crimes of the Penisthank flying spaghetti monster its friday
no guest this week, still reeling from loss of our instagram account. we have a new one, follow that please. instagram.com/westernpromises_subsistence
free tonychasebusiness
free darrell
free drugcultgang
support the boys and our album writing trip to the cabin in the woods and get access to all other content:
patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-11-111h 14
Western Promises063 NoNutNovember w/smegmagicianJoin us for this exciting radio drama. What is going to happen with anna taylor joy and this big horse? will the jockey be involved? how much? too much?
Smegmagician joins us to not masturbate at all while we discuss teaching your son to masturbate, tiktok, the internet, pornography, and Dance Dance Revolution.
Article read this episode: https://slate.com/human-interest/2022/04/how-to-talk-to-a-teenager-about-masturbation.html
Follow smegmagician on instagram: https://www.instagram.com/smegmagician/
Support Western Promises and get access to all bonus content: patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-11-041h 35
Western Promises062 r/selfcircumcision w/schizotopiaWe are joined by Max from Schizotopia to discuss self circumcision, darrell brooks, diamond and silk, bait car, to catch a predator, swatch internet time, and so much more.
Support the show and get access to all additional bonus content:
patreon.com/westernpromises
Follow Schizotopia
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/schizotopia.pod/
Podcast: Schizotopia
2022-10-281h 36
Western Promises*TEASER* wpp015 Justice4DarrellA preview of bonus episode 15 Justice4Darrell
To listen to the full episode, get access to all other bonus content, and to help me get top surgery, subscribe to our patreon.
patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-10-2705 min
Western Promises061 The Framing of Darrell Brooks by the Coward State of WisconsinWhat we are witSHAUNnessing is a gross miscarriage ofSHAUN justice and a corrupt legal sySHAUNstem. I dont care if this tanks tSHAUNhe show or gets us blacklSHAUNisted, we at Western PromSHAUNises stand up for what we beliSHAUNeve in and we shout truth to power. I havSHAUNe not been watching the trial anSHAUNd I am unaware of any specifics. PleSHAUNase do not contact me.
support the fellas:
patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-10-221h 21
Western Promises060 Trickle Around Polynomics w/ Academic FraudJoined once again by our pal Academic Fraud to discuss Canadian politics, lizzo, pit bulls, return, polyamory, twitchcon, pokemon, the young turks, and most importantly redacted.
Buy his books:
https://fraud.cool/
Support the boys:
patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-10-141h 20
Western Promises058 Love IslandCLASSIC EPISODE ALERT
Kevin is dead, long live kevin
Kevin's frail chinese body has succumbed to a world of warcraft virus and now it is just Beaumont and Paris, the original WP boys. All texas all the time.
I thought for sure Andrew and Tasha were done after he "licked her tit or whatever" but wow they really pulled through. I know i dont know them but i feel like they will truly make it on the outside.
Hasan Piker
no-f...
2022-09-301h 12
Western Promises057 TimBook 2Imagine a city. Now imagine that city in a 3 dimensional space. Take it and elevate it 1500 feet into the air. suspend it. rotate it 90 degrees on its y axis. separate all doors from their hinges. remove all screws from fences and uproot all trees. remove all color except for cyan. rotate it again, this time 45 degrees on its x axis. combine all the dogs into a big ball in the middle of the convention center. fall in love with a beautiful woman. mod your xbox. install armed and dangerous from a burned dvd you borrowed from your older cousin...
2022-09-231h 04
Western Promises056 MR SUPER MARIO VIDEO 1-1 WORLD #1WELCOME TO A WORLD OF MARIO
BRACE IN FOR THE RIDE OF YOUR LIFE
subscribe to watch us eventually finish deus ex and join our discord (we'll link it again at some point):
https://www.patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-09-191h 25
Western Promises055 Viva Hate track 121. hi we're not dead but a host by the name of "Bow Mont" has died tragically in a car accident RIP
2. did regis philbin psyop norm madcdonald into losing celebrity millionare? yes
3. a very special bonus ep thing being edited as we speak and will be out soon we promise
4. nothing wrong with me
5. nothing wrong with me
6. somethings got to give
7. let the bodies hit the floor
subscribe to our patreon so we can afford a new cohost:
patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-09-101h 08
Western PromisesMikey Miles pt2 UNLOCKEDThe second half of our conversation with Mikey Miles. We get into his relationship to his family, his views on global politics, and his run in with the law. Love him or hate him there is no denying that he is Mikey Miles.
For all of our episodes and bonus content subscribe to our patreon:
www.patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-08-121h 08
Western Promises052 Residente Demoniaco w/weirdbipedThe Flash
Resident Evil 2 Remaster
Ciudad Juarez
The list goes on. WE are joined by the crazy white boy weirdbiped. Listen in to one of the most nut-nut episodes yet.
Follow weirdbiped on instagram:
weirdbiped
For part two of this episode and all other bonus episodes and content subscribe to our patreon:
patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-08-051h 09
Western Promises051 Ugandan AviationTerrence Howard thinks 1x1 = 2, has a secret system called 'Terryology' and spends 17 hours a day making nameless plastic structures
'This is the last century that our children will have to be taught that one times one is one'
FOR MORE CONTENT AND TO SUPPORT THE FELLAS SUB TO:
PATREON.COM/WESTERNPROMISES
2022-07-291h 07
Western Promises049 The Urbz: The Sims in the CityFirst fully in person episode with all of the fellas. As close to Lori as we have ever been. The energy is buzzing the camaraderie is buzzing the coors banquet is flowing. If comcast doesnt fix my internet soon im going to self immolate on the steps of city hall.
Subscribe to our patreon:
patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-07-151h 24
Western Promises048 Earthbound and DownWP Fine Arts Edition. We are joined by the_last_male_poet to discuss Earthbound and Ezra Miller.
Follow the_last_male_poet on instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/the_last_male_poet/
For more content and to support the arts subscribe to our patreon:
www.patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-07-081h 54
Western Promises047 KING COBRA JFSwhat is there to say. the boys meet one of their heroes. Mr. Cobra, it was truly an honor.
Part 2 coming soon on our Patreon, subscribe to get access to more Cobra and more everything:
www.patreon.com/westernpromises
King Cobra's Wands and Music:
https://soundcloud.com/kingcobrajfs
https://www.etsy.com/shop/CobraCraftWands
2022-07-011h 00
Western Promises045 A Conversation with a NudistThe Boys had a wonderful conversation with Dan, a naked man. He is a nudist author and all around great guy.
In solidarity I was naked all day and during the podcast but rudely Paris and Kevin were fully clothed. Cowards.
Topics:
brett kavanaugh attempted shooting
Monkey given life sentence in India
Nude dating
Much more i think
Support the boys and get access to so much bonus content:
patreon.com/westernpromises
Check out more of Dan and his books at:
https://dhjonathan.com/
2022-06-101h 37
Western Promiseswpp008 Goon Caverns (UNLOCKED)Premium Episode Unlocked
For more premium episodes and video content subscribe to our patreon. also support your beautiful gay boys:
patreon.com/westernpromises
welcome to the goon cave. *kisses you on the cheek like tony soprano* welcome to your new family. the end is nigh. turning point usa. CENK?! CENK?! CEEEEEENNNKKKKK!!!!!!
2022-06-031h 08
Western Promisesep043 Ludacris Naruto（*＾3＾）/～♡ WESTERN PROMISES LOVE AND POSITIVITY ARC （*＾3＾）/～♡
4 Indian guys and a monitor lizard walk into a bar.
Support the show and get more content:
patreon.com/westernpromises
Youtube Channel:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIQ7BY9VwAXUFPkk6XZ6wnw
2022-05-201h 16
Western Promises043 Two Promises One Cup with Western PromisesWESTERN PROMISES X WESTERN PROMISES
A true David and Goliath story of a scrappy upstart podcasting company from Texas going up against a titan of industry creative agency from Paris.
We are joined by Chloe from Western Promises, a creative solutions agency based in Paris to discuss potential litigation, terrorism, decline of western civilization and expectations, Euphoria, Cuties, and what the hole that birds use to piss shit and cum out of is called.
WESTERN PROMISES
http://western-promises.com
If you enjoy this episode or any ot...
2022-05-131h 08
Western Promises040 SISSY HYPNOR E L A X N O W
YOU ARE FEELING SEXY. YOU ARE FEELING SO FREE. FUN STOCKINGS. FEELING HAPPY. FEELING FREE. WANTING TO PLEASE ME. WANTING TO DO THINGS FOR ME. FUN. HAPPY. NO CONSEQUENCES. CAREFREE. WEARING STOCKINGS. WEARING SEXY STOCKINGS.
YOU ARE RATING THE SHOW ON SPOTIFY. 5 STARS. YOU ARE SUBSCRIBING TO THE PATREON
PATREON.COM/WESTERNPROMISES
2022-04-251h 05
Western Promises039 APOSTATE THINKINGThe fellas listen to and discuss the "Marking Talk" given to Beaumont's congregation when he left the Jehovah's Witnesses.
This is part 1 of of 2.
For part two subscribe to our patreon:
www.patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-04-041h 32
Western Promises036 Mikey Miles Part 1What can we even say about this. The man, the legend, the infamous Mr. Mikey Miles.
This is part one of Mikey Miles on Western Promises.
For part two subscribe to our patreon:
patreon.com/westernpromises
Follow Mikey Miles on instagram here:
https://www.instagram.com/mikeymiles160/
2022-03-0956 min
Western Promises035 Lori NicefootFirst official episode with kevinsorbofan as cohost.
elden ring
lori lightfoots cute little hoofs
voyeurism
Russia/Ukraine analysis
ELDEN RING
patreon.com/westernpromises
2022-03-071h 43
Western Promises030 The Sublime Ideolgy of Objectification w/Alex Beinstock pt1Join us in a celebration and appreciation of the feminine with Alex Beinstock. This is part one of the episode. for part two you'll need to mosey on down to patreon.com/westernpromises
Follow Alex on instagram here:
https://www.instagram.com/wholesomecreativeguy/
2022-01-251h 05
Western Promises029 2 Kings 9:10 with discountfiooringADVERTISE ADVERTISE ADVERTISE The Kingdom of Jehovah.
discountfiooring hangs out and and attempts to beat the tadpole torture allegations
If you like what you hear folks consider subbing to the patreon here:
www.patreon.com/westernpromises
And you can follow discountfiooring on istagram here:
discountfiooring
2022-01-171h 12
Western Promises028 Dynasty Warriors 2022 w/davidy____Happy new year. arent we all so glad to be dumping that heckin garbage fire that was 2021?!?! what a real douche-canoe of a year am i right?
Western Promises invites you to celebrate the first Monday of 2022 with Beaumont and Paris and our pal David. Who is this "David?" Well you will just have to listen to find out.
We love you.
If you enjoyed this episode or any of the other ones, consider signing up for our patreon at:
www.patreon.com/westernpromises
D...
2022-01-031h 29Western Promises027 A Friendly Conversation with A Guy Who Eats His PoopWhat is there to say here? We had a nice conversation with Poo_Devourer. Poo is someone with (practices?) Coprophagia which www.PetMD.com describes as the act of consuming feces.
We also talk about Louis Thereoux a bit.
Sign up for our Patreon please :D
www.patreon.com/westernpromises
2021-12-2749 minWestern Promises026 PATREON.COM/WESTERNPROMISES with Ryan MaleadyFolks this PATREON.COM/WESTERNPROMISES week we had on our pal Ryan Maleady. We disPATREON.COM/WESTERNPROMISEScuss hacktivism, looney toons, PATREON.COM/WESTERNPROMISES NASCAR, donotresearch, and his new book called: PATREON.COM/WESTERNPROMISES Flounder.
But folx, sign up for our Patreon. I wont link it here because self promotion makes me feel a little gross but you can find it im sure. Lots of fun and interesting things in the chamber coming down the pipe so to speak.
Follow RyanPATREON.COM/WESTERNPROMISES Maleady here:
https://www.instagram.com/ryanmaleady/
Just kidding, tha...
2021-12-201h 14