Shows
Life Is Love School4 Reasons You Attract Narcissists & How To Repel ThemTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschoo
Have you found that you keep attracting narcissists? Narcissists make awful partners, so why do some people get entangled with narcissists over and over again?
In this video, I cover four reasons why this keeps happening and how to repel them for good.
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Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/life-is-love-school/support
2022-12-1313 min
Life Is Love SchoolCan You Change Your Partner?TRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you have someone in your life whom you love and care deeply for, but being with them makes you miserable? You can't help but wish you could make them change.
If the answer is yes, today's episode is for you.
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Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/life-is-love-school/support
2022-11-2809 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhy Does Your Partner Put You Down or Devalue You?TRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
"My partner puts me down, and I don't know why."
Is this your reality? If so, you need to know what's behind your partner's belittling behavior and how to deal with it.
In this video, I explain the psychology behind why your partner belittles you and, more importantly, what you need to do to protect yourself.
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Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/life-is-love-school...
2022-11-0912 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow To Be "Lucky In Love"TRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschoo
Being lucky in love isn’t like being struck by lightning — it’s a lot less random (and painful) than we think.
So what's the secret? In this episode, I cover the 5 mindsets that people who are lucky in love all hold so you can use them to supercharge your love life.
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Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/life-is-love-school/support
2022-10-3010 min
Life Is Love SchoolCrucial Dating Mindsets For The Anxiously AttachedTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschoo
If your attachment style is Anxiously Attached, dating is often far from fun. Waiting for text messages, confirming plans, and not knowing where the relationship is going could all trigger deep-seated fear of abandonment and not being good enough.
Besides being stress-inducing, not knowing how to date well means that you can find yourself yet again in a relationship where your needs are not fulfilled.
But it doesn't ha...
2022-09-0810 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow To Break The Anxious-Avoidant TrapTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschoo
Do you tend to choose partners that don't want as much intimacy as you or the reverse?
Are you tired of drama-filled, push-pull relationships?
I hear you. Relationships with insecure partners are difficult because of their unpredictability.
If you feel like you're always chasing a partner or being chased, you might be caught in the "anxious-avoidant trap."
If you want to learn how to...
2022-09-0117 min
Life Is Love School6 Things To Stop Doing If You Want To Be More ConfidentTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschoo
People often ask me what they can do to stop feeling insecure and improve their confidence.
But the curious thing is…
Self-confidence is more about what you should stop doing than what you need to do.
In this episode, I cover 6 things you want to avoid doing if you want to be confident.
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Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/life-is-love-school/support
2022-08-0311 min
Life Is Love School6 Mindsets to Dramatically Speed Up Your HealingTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschoo
Emotional trauma, whether it's abuse or a painful event, can leave you struggling with difficult emotions, memories, and flashbacks that won't go away.
If you suffered trauma, it is understandable that you wish to feel better as soon as possible? Luckily, some mindsets can help you speed up recovery, and I cover some of the key ones in this episode.
Stages of Change Poem: https://simpleandpractical.com/stages-change-poem/
2022-07-0510 min
Life Is Love SchoolAnxiously Attached Relationship Strategies That Do Not Work (And What Do To Instead)TRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschoo
Because of deep-seated insecurity from their past, Anxiously Attached people often can behave in ways that seem desperate, insecure, demanding, possessive, jealous, or controlling toward their partner.
They want their partner's love and approval more than anything, yet their behavior often pushes people away. In this episode, I cover the most common harmful behaviors that Anxiously Attached people do that hurt their relationships and what you can do instead.
...
2022-06-1412 min
Life Is Love School8 Signs of Borderline Personality DisorderTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschoo
Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental health disorder that affects roughly 1.5% of the population. It impacts the way people think and feel about themselves and those around them. Sufferers often exhibit extreme mood swings, fear of abandonment, self-image issues, and a pattern of unstable relationships.
In this episode, I cover 8 common symptoms of BPD. I respond to every comment, so drop a comment; I'm always interested to know what...
2022-05-2813 min
Life Is Love SchoolSigns You Might Have the Fearful-Avoidant Attachment StyleTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Social Media: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
In relationships, do you oscillate between anxious behaviors like clinginess, jealousy, and keeping score and avoidant behaviors such as withdrawing and ghosting?
People with a fearful-avoidant attachment style tend to have either tumultuous relationships filled with ups and downs or very tenuous, distant ones that lack real intimacy or commitment.
If you feel like this might be you, this episode is for you. I share 3 signs to help you ascertain if y...
2022-05-0309 min
Life Is Love SchoolHealing the Fearful-Avoidant Attachment StyleTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
The Fearful-Avoidant attachment style is rare; only about 2% of people have this as their predominant attachment style.
This style combines the worst features of the Anxious and Dismissive-Avoidant attachment styles and leads to confusing and contradictory behavior in relationships.
You desperately want love, and yet you are also terrified of intimacy. In relationships, you flip-flop, run hot and cold, and you never can relax because you never feel safe.
If this is you, this...
2022-03-2813 min
Life Is Love SchoolUnderstanding the Fearful-Avoidant PartnerTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
The fearful-avoidant attachment style is both the rarest and least understood form of attachment style.
This attachment style is generally born out of trauma and is a combination of the preoccupied and dismissive-avoidant styles of insecure attachment.
This episode covers how a fearful-avoidant person sees herself, her worldview, how she shows up in relationships, and why.
Depending on viewer interest, I am happy to do follow-up videos on 1) how to heal from t...
2022-03-1610 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Do Low Contact Like a ProTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Is there someone in your life that drains your energy every time you spend time with them, but you have trouble letting them go?
Maybe it's a family member, a friend you've known for a long time, or an ex.
No matter who they are, part of you resents them for not respecting you, your time, and your space, yet you are not ready to completely cut off contact for a variety of often very g...
2022-02-0814 min
Life Is Love School3 Reasons Your Partner Give For Not Marrying That Are Just ExcusesTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Have you been in a relationship for a while, but it doesn’t seem to be progressing toward marriage?
In this episode, I cover some of the most common reasons people bring up for not marrying you: these reasons are almost always hiding something deeper and what you can do to get to the truth so you can make the right decision for yourself.
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Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/life-is-love-school/support
2022-01-1810 min
Life Is Love SchoolIs Cohabitating Before Marriage a Good Idea?TRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
If you've been dating for a while, the topic of whether to move in together will come up. Close to 70% of people cohabitate before marriage, and the number has been rising over the years because people are waiting to marry and rising housing prices.
Some people see living together as a trial for marriage, while others see it as a matter of "why not" when living together confers conveniences and cost savings.
What's interesting is t...
2022-01-0209 min
Life Is Love SchoolAnxiously Attached: Handling Abandonment Triggers in RelationshipsWomen-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
If you have the anxious attachment style, there's a high chance that you could misread your partner's behavior as a sign of abandonment.
You get into a vicious cycle in which you have fear and anxiety around loss, make attempts to keep that loved one(s) close, but these attempts make the person want to distance from you, and your fear around loss is confirmed.
If this describes your relationship dynamic, this episode is for...
2021-12-2610 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhat happens when you love someone with Low Self-EsteemTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Are you dating someone with low self-esteem?
We all know that people who have low self-esteem suffer from feeling unlovable and not good enough, but being in a relationship with someone with low self-worth poses unique challenges as well.
Do you know what they are and why?
If you're curious to learn more, this video is for you.
On this note...if you want 2022 to be the year where you...
2021-12-1813 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhat Keeps People Stuck In Toxic RelationshipsTRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
Is there someone you care about that's stuck in a toxic relationship and can't seem to leave?
Maybe they left then went back, and this back and forth happened repeatedly over the years.
You're doing your best to be supportive; you're there to listen to their complaints, to affirm their worth, and to validate that, yes, they are not overreacting.
One day, they seemed to finally "get it." The two of you excitedly hatched a pl...
2021-12-1311 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhy Do I Miss My Toxic Ex (And How To Stay Strong Post Leaving)TRIBE Women-Only Membership Program: https://bit.ly/Anchor2TRIBE
Free Self-Love PDF: https://bit.ly/Anchor22xOTO
If you've just left a toxic relationship but are struggling emotionally, you are not alone.
Many survivors of toxic relationships are baffled why they still miss their ex when the relationship brought them so much pain. "What is wrong with me?" is a common refrain, often said with much self-blame.
In this episode, I explain why euphoric recall, or the selective remembering of only the good, is a normal and expected part of detaching f...
2021-12-0510 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Connect with A Dismissive-Avoidant PartnerFree Self-Love PDF: https://lifeisloveschool.krtra.com/t/fS5TorkWjNXc
TRIBE Women-Only Program: https://www.lifeisloveschool.com/TRIBE
Connect with fellow survivors: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
If you want more intimacy, dating a partner who has the dismissive-avoidant attachment style can be quite painful. Everything seems to be going well, but next thing you know, they are backtracking and pushing you away. The relationship seems to take two steps forever, one step back.
If you are in a relationship with a dismissive-avoidant partner and wish to build more intimacy with them, this v...
2021-11-3017 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhat To Do When Someone Guilt Trips YouFree Self-Love PDF: https://lifeisloveschool.krtra.com/t/fS5TorkWjNXc
Connect with fellow survivors: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
For many people, breaking the people-pleasing pattern and setting boundaries poses a unique challenge during the holidays.
If you were taught that your value lies in how much you do for others, then setting limits or saying no can feel very uncomfortable, and you may find dealing with guilt trippers especially challenging.
But weakness, uncertainty, or wavering signals are to guilt trippers what blood is to a shark.
If you cave or seem frightened, they wi...
2021-11-2112 min
Life Is Love School9 Dating Mindsets Mistakes (And What To Do Instead)Free Self-Love PDF: https://lifeisloveschool.krtra.com/t/fS5TorkWjNXc
Connect with fellow survivors: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
The wild world of dating can be a tricky one to navigate. After all, "How to Date" is not a skill they teach you in school, but dating well is essential to your ability to find and keep a great partner.
You might have read books that focus on strategies, and many of these books advocate game playing. If you've tried their tactics, you might see some short-term results in the best case, but things...
2021-11-1214 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhen To Leave A RelationshipFree Self-Love PDF: https://lifeisloveschool.krtra.com/t/fS5TorkWjNXc
Connect with fellow survivors: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
It isn't always clear when to leave a relationship. How do you know if your partnership can be fixed, or is beyond repair?
Of course, emotional and physical abuse are always signs to leave a relationship. But outside of that, the decision isn't always as easy.
You can get stuck in the decision process because you don't want to make a hasty decision to leave if the relationship is workable. At the same...
2021-11-0310 min
Life Is Love SchoolAutumn's Story: How healing myself healed my childrenFree Self-Love PDF: https://lifeisloveschool.krtra.com/t/fS5TorkWjNXc
Connect with fellow survivors: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
In today's episode, I interview Autumn, TRIBE founding member, mom of four sons, ICU nurse manager, and one of the most courageous, inspiring, and growth-minded people I know.
Autumn and her siblings were forcibly removed from her biological parents when Autumn was just one year old. For the next two years, the system shuttled her to a succession of twelve foster families; the rapid changes meant she could not attach to anyone, and she missed her siblings ter...
2021-10-0835 min
Life Is Love School5 Tips to Finding a Healthy Relationship If You Are Anxiously AttachedConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
If you’re constantly worrying about your partners, feel like they don’t like you as much as you like them, want to see them 24/7, need constant reassurance from them, then you’re probably anxiously attached.
Relationships can be rough for the anxiously attached. There are so many situations in intimate partnerships that can trigger the attachment trauma in an anxiously attached person that many are reluctant to date, and those in relationships are often miserable because of abandonment anxiety. The good news is if you are a...
2021-10-0312 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Handle GaslightingConnect with fellow survivors and access healing resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
A form of emotional abuse common to many toxic family systems is gaslighting. Experiencing gaslighting in any relationship is damaging, but the effects can be even more devastating when coming from a parent and the gaslighting happened when you were little. Small children unconditionally trust their parents' point of view, so if the parents invalidated how they feel or what they saw or blamed them for things they are not responsible for, the child learned not to trust her own reality and to over-apologize.
Unf...
2021-10-0312 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Overcome the Fear of FailureConnect with fellow survivors and access healing resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Have you ever wanted to take a risk, whether that's in your love life, your career, or moving to a new place, but fear of failure holds you back from taking that first step?
Children and adults who have experienced childhood trauma have a lower ability to tolerate stress than people who grew up with a normative childhood. Trauma sensitizes the amygdala to threat perception, and fear responses are triggered over time by less and less stress.
Specifically, over 90% of trauma surv...
2021-09-0825 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow To Deal With My Sister's CriticismConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
We often think that our friends and family should have our back, but sometimes they are the ones that pour a bucket of cold water down our heads. In this episode, I answer a question about how to handle the criticism of other people, including those closest to you.
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2021-08-2009 min
Life Is Love SchoolUnderstanding The Dismissive-Avoidant PartnerConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
The dismissive-avoidant is one of the most misunderstood attachment styles. A dismissive-avoidant often show up in relationships as someone who:
Prefers keeping the connection on the surface-level
Focuses on sexual intimacy but avoids emotional closeness
Runs "hot and cold" with their affection
Pulls away when someone starts getting close
Resists vulnerability — comes off as ultra independent and emotionally invincible
May actively sabotage the relationships when things are going well
Many people believe that dismissive-avoidants cannot connect, do not want intimacy, and do not fe...
2021-08-1720 min
Life Is Love SchoolRevictimization Why Bad Things Keep Happening To You?Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Freud coined the term “repetition compulsion” to describe the puzzling phenomenon where an abuse victim repeatedly puts themselves in situations that replicate the distress they experienced in an earlier life.
This might look like:
You were physically abused as a child, and later your partners were also violent towards you.
You were abandoned or neglected as a child, and you date people who similar ignore and reject you.
You grew up as an invisible child, and you end up in adult relationships wher...
2021-08-1416 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Find a Great Partner After Experiencing Abuse (Part II)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
In this episode, I continue from the last episode (Listen to Part I) and cover additional tips for how to date smart so you find a great partner and prevent the common traps that suck survivors into abusive relationships.
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Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/life-is-love-school/support
2021-08-0316 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Find a Great Partner After Experiencing Abuse (Part I)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
People who suffered childhood abuse tend to do one of two things as adults: isolate to avoid getting hurt again, or turn to toxic individuals who remind them of their abusive caretakers.
Revictimization, the phenomenon where childhood abuse survivors tend to get abused again in adult relationships, is unfortunately common. However, it does not have to be this way.
In this episode and next, I call out common pitfalls that trip many survivors in the dating phase and provide you specific tips...
2021-08-0312 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Break the Trauma BondConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Have you ever been in a toxic or even outright abusive relationship but find it next to impossible to leave? A part of you that knows the relationship is unhealthy and wreaking havoc on your mental health. Still, the idea of leaving is terrifying, maybe even feels impossible because you've tried many times and you went back every time.
Why is it so hard to leave when the relationship causes you so much pain?
If this is ringing a bell, you ma...
2021-07-2712 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Stop Self-Blame After a BreakupConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
When something bad happens, do you automatically think it's your fault?
Many childhood trauma survivors tend to default to self-blame. When you were little, developmentally, you could not see beyond yourself and understand that your caregivers could not meet your needs. Because of this, when bad things happen, blaming it on yourself seems the most reasonable, especially since you saw your parents as all-knowing, all-powerful, and perfect beyond blame.
The habit of blaming oneself is exacerbated if your parents also r...
2021-07-2110 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhy People Don't Recognize They Were Abused in Childhood (Part II)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
This is a follow up to part I: https://anchor.fm/life-is-love-school/episodes/Why-People-Dont-Recognize-They-Were-Abused-in-Childhood-Part-I-e148i15/a-a4969gp
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2021-07-1306 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Trust Again After Experiencing TraumaConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you tell yourself:
I don't need anyone.
I can do everything myself.
If I let people in, they will hurt me.
If you suffered abuse at the hands of people you once trusted, feeling that you have your back to the wall and you cannot trust anyone again is a common coping mechanism.
You built this hard shell to shield your heart from further abuse, betrayal, and disappointment.
You not only find it difficult to trust others, b...
2021-07-1310 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhy People Don't Recognize They Were Abused in Childhood (Part I)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
It takes the average childhood abuse victim 24 years to reveal their trauma history, even though disclosure is often the key to recovery. Some survivors choose to keep silent to avoid potential stigma, but others are not consciously aware that they suffered abuse.
In this episode, I cover the first 5 of 10 reasons why survivors might not recognize that they were abused as children.
You cannot change what you do not acknowledge. — Dr. Phil
Not recognizing abuse is actually very common, but i...
2021-07-1107 min
Life Is Love School5 reasons people don't recognize they're being abusedConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Have you ever counseled a friend who is obviously in an abusive relationship but they don't seem to recognize it? To an outsider, it can be baffling why someone chooses to stay in an abusive relationship when all the evidence is there that they should leave. You really care about this person, and you see the toll the abuse has on them, yet they seem to live in denial and may even come to defend their abuser.
In this episode, I share 5 reas...
2021-07-0806 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Stop Over Apologizing — Say This InsteadConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Over-apologizing is when you have the habit of saying "I'm sorry" when you don't need to. Here are some examples: You approach the receptionists at your doctor's office by saying, "I'm sorry to bother you. I have a question." Your partner makes an inappropriate joke at a dinner party. "I'm sorry. They're not usually like this," you say to people. Your friend came to visit you, and it's raining. "I'm so sorry for the bad weather!" you tell your friend. In each of these cases...
2021-07-0807 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhy People Don't Recognize They Were Abused in Childhood (Part II)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
It takes the average childhood abuse victim 24 years to reveal their trauma history, even though disclosure is often the key to recovery. Some survivors choose to keep silent to avoid potential stigma, but others are not consciously aware that they suffered abuse. In this episode, I cover reasons 6-10 of why survivors might not recognize that they were abused as children.
If you missed the first 5, you can find it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Szog5SRzWf8
You cannot change what you...
2021-07-0606 min
Life Is Love School7 Signs You're in a Healthy RelationshipConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
People often spend a lot of time talking about red flags and how to spot a toxic relationship, but there is a lot less discussion about what constitutes a healthy relationship. In this episode, I share 7 signs that signal you are in a healthy relationship. Knowing what a healthy relationship looks like is especially for adult survivors of childhood trauma — to have healthy intimacy, you need to know what to look for and not just what to avoid.
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Support this podcast: https://podcaste...
2021-07-0509 min
Life Is Love SchoolNarcissistic Personality Disorder and Attachment StylesConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you ever wonder if there's a link between Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) and attachment styles?
When people think about NPD, they think of someone like a Don Draper — A person with an inflated sense of self that comes off as arrogant, entitled, and envious. However, there's another type of NPD where the individual presents themselves as insecure, focusing on themselves but seeking reassurance from others.
In this episode, I cover the differences between the two types of narcissists and t...
2021-07-0309 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Heal the Anxious Preoccupied Attachment StyleConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you feel insecure in relationships?
Have you acted out because of your overwhelming insecurity?
Are you worried that your protest behavior (acting clinging, jealous, upset) is pushing your partner away?
If you answer YES to these questions, you may have a predominantly Anxious Attachment style.
Our attachment styles are formed in childhood, and a person with the Anxious Attachment style likely had unpredictable, emotionally immature, or unstable parents that only provided inconsistent care. This lack of stability leaves the child not kno...
2021-06-2919 min
Life Is Love School6 Simple Ways to Stop Self-Sabotaging BehaviorsConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you know what kills the most dreams? It’s not lack of education, money, preparation, but our internal resistance.
The more we want something, the stronger the resistance inside of us fights back.
Sometimes it just feels better (and easier) to self-sabotage and control our failure than face the possibility of giving it all yet still failing.
We are afraid to be left with the possibility that our best is just not good enough.
We might...
2021-06-1020 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Crush Stress at Work with Lolita GuarinConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you work for an unreasonable boss?
Do you wish that you are better at saying no so you’re not always overwhelmed?
Do you want to feel more peace but struggle with the how?
If so, this episode is for you. Stress Management coach Lolita Guarin (http://www.beamazingyou.com/) is one of my favorite people, and after you listen to this episode, you will know why.
As the only child raised by alcoholic, controlling parents, Lolit...
2021-05-3134 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow To Redesign Your Life in MidlifeConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Midlife is when many people start to wonder if they are on the right path. This question could feel unsettling, even scary. After all, by midlife, most of us have invested a few decades in our chosen line of work, and starting afresh seems daunting.
Statistically speaking, over 43% of women will live beyond their 90s, and close to 10% will live to 100, so doing a pivot at midlife is not too late! You should do work that brings you joy until you take y...
2021-05-2614 min
The Unlucky Sperm ClubThe Mindset and Practices You Need to Heal Childhood Trauma with Yumay ChangEvery experience is to teach us how to love ourselves and how to love other people better. You just get better at loving.
- Yumay Chang
Today we are lucky to have Yumay Chang. She is the Chief Community Officer at Life is Love School. She’s also in charge of a lot of people at Google, she’s also worked at Microsoft. She graduated High School at 16 and got her Master’s degree at Stanford at 21.
Life is love school 1:40
Her pain story, circumstances and bringing purpose 3:54
Her mi...
2021-05-1829 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Talk To Your Partner When The Stakes Are HighConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
The sign of a healthy relationship isn't that two people never fight. In fact, it's often a sign of problems. Either the couple suppresses their emotions, which leads to mounting resentment, or one or both partners are indifferent toward their relationship and don't care enough to even fight. The key to a long, happy relationship isn't that there's no conflict but whether disputes can be resolved constructively.
In this episode, I cover the simple skills that will immediately uplevel your ability to...
2021-05-1516 min
Life Is Love School30 Signs You Suffered Childhood Trauma Part IIConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
As a follow-up to the previous episode, which covers signs 1 through 15, in this episode, I cover 16 through 30 of the common signs that you suffered childhood trauma. If you think you are uniquely broken from the abuse, I want you to know that you are not. Your brain and body did the best they can to cope with impossible situations, and as an adult, you can learn how to heal yourself and how to have successful relationships.
For the first 15 signs, check out “30 Sig...
2021-05-0618 min
Life Is Love School30 Signs You're Dealing With Childhood Trauma Part IConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
In the USA, nearly 700,000 children are abused in U.S each year. Unfortunately, trauma leaves a legacy; research by the CDC shows that trauma survivors are more likely to die by suicide, suffer chronic mental and physical illness, have a shortened life span, and fall prey to abuse in their adult relationships.
The reason? Trauma, especially in early childhood, where the brain is still fragile and in development, causes structural changes in the brain that impact how one senses and processes emotions.
2021-05-0622 min
Life Is Love School4 Tips for Dealing with Boundary PushersConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
If you are new to boundary setting, you can expect that people who don’t like your boundaries will test you to see if you mean business. Thye may use manipulations such as guilt-tripping, giving you the silent treatment, anger, etc., to get you to take back your boundaries.
If you have people-pleasing tendencies and can’t stand the discomfort, you might end up caving to their demands and putting their priority ahead of your own. The worst part is, knowing you c...
2021-04-2912 min
Life Is Love SchoolUse These 3 Simple Skills To Handle People Who Ghost YouConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Have you had to deal with people communicate by “not communicating?”
I’m talking about people who stonewall, disappear, or ignore you when you want to talk to them to solve issues or get closure. People like this can be incredibly frustrating to deal with because non of your ninja communication skills work when they won’t even come to the table. Dealing with evaders is especially hard for you if you’ve suffered abandonment and neglect growing up; their non-responsiveness can evoke the f...
2021-04-2309 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Remove Trauma TriggersConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Most people who suffer PTSD also have trauma triggers. One of mine was seeing men with furrowed brows. My heart rate would surge, my palms would sweat, and I want to run, even though I know my fear is irrational.
Sounds familiar?
Per Wikipedia:
A trauma trigger is a psychological stimulus that prompts the recall of a previous traumatic experience. The stimulus itself need not be frightening or traumatic. It could be only superficially reminiscent of an earlier t...
2021-03-3010 min
Life Is Love SchoolMy Best Friend Is Grieving And I Feel Left Out with Yumay ChangConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
In this episode, I answer a question on how best to support someone we love when they are grieving.
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2021-02-1706 min
Neff Inspiration123 Yumay Chang - The Power To Manifest: Triumph from Childhood AbuseIn Yumay's words: I was severely abused by sadistic parents - overt dad and covert mom, and emigrated to the US at age 20 with nothing and no one. I learned how to heal myself and build a life: 1. MS in CS from Stanford at age 21. Paid for school by being a CS TA despite English being my second language. 2. Financially free in my early 30s. 3. Ran/Running global sales teams for Microsoft and Google. 4. Built and sold a striving race business with over 20k racers. 5. I was a pretty good athlete myself at one poi...
2021-02-1245 min
Life Is Love SchoolI Scanned My Boyfriend's Phone And Found Him CheatingConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Join our free private FB group:
https://bit.ly/LILSFBGroup
In this episode, I answer the question, "I went through my boyfriend's phone and found that he’s cheating on me, what should I do?"
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Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/life-is-love-school/support
2021-02-1204 min
Life Is Love SchoolMy Avoidant Boyfriend Asked For A Break — What Should I Do?Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
I answer the question: I'm Anxiously Attached, and my boyfriend is Avoidantly Attached. We've been together for about a year or so. Recently he told me that he's feeling overwhelmed. He just got a new job, and he said that he's having a hard time making it all work and feels like taking a break from our relationship between his boys, work, and me. I am devastated. He's the first guy I fell in love with in a long time, but I also kn...
2021-01-2707 min
STRESSD PodcastHow To Heal Your Inner ChildInterview with Yumay Chang. I had the pleasure to interview Yumay for the podcast last week and felt extremely inspired and grateful to speak so openly with her about her experience and the important work she is doing today. Yumay is an Engineering Manager at Google and Founder of the Life Is Love School. In this podcast episode you will learn:✨How childhood abuse can spill into all areas of your life✨How childhood abuse influences your performance at work✨Tools on how to start loving yourself and overcome old beliefs and deep-seated pattern...
2021-01-2742 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhy Therapy Alone Is Not Enough To Heal YouConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Have you ever relied so much on a therapist you felt like you couldn’t handle life without him/her?
I did. I found her during my divorce when I was experiencing major depression. I remember walking into her office feeling lousy and walking out feeling lighter. I saw her regularly, sometimes twice a week, for over a year. I needed her so much, I almost decided against moving across states for a promotion.
I didn’t realize it then...
2021-01-2610 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow To Not Take Things PersonallyConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
In this episode, I answer this question from a Life Is Love School member:
I feel like I walk around the world with no skin on. I am easily triggered by people, but in retrospect, it usually turns out that I’ve made the wrong assumptions. How do I stop taking everything so personally?
This question is great because so many of us walk around the world preoccupied with what other people think of us. If this is an issu...
2021-01-2107 min
Life Is Love SchoolThe Slippery Slope of Narcissistic Abuse (And The Fight To Regain My Identity)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Did you ever wonder how successful and confident people get sucked into narcissistic relationships?
Theresa Rozyla was in her mid-twenties when she met the man who became her husband. She was beautiful, bright, and held a job she loved as a corporate marketing person for Dufry.
They were happy for the first few years, but then slowly, the put-downs came. It started with the occasional comment about her physical appearance, but it escalated to daily put-downs of how she is...
2021-01-0423 min
Life Is Love SchoolWhy Childhood Trauma Survivors Suffer More Chronic Pain (And How To Feel Better)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you live with chronic back or neck pain?
Did your doctor tell you that this is “all part of getting older” and that there’s nothing they can do?
Do you ever wonder why people with similar back and neck degeneration experience drastically different pain levels, some not at all?
Do you ever wonder why so many childhood trauma victims suffer from chronic, debilitating pain?
Studies worldwide have shown that the presence of early trauma appear...
2020-12-3124 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow I Overcame Eating Disorder And Found Myself with Maggie DongConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you struggle with food? The holidays can be challenging for people who suffer from an eating disorder, and our guest Maggie Dong can relate to the struggles.
At age 16, Maggie’s life spiraled out of control when her mom suddenly passed away, and her father was sent to jail. Left with a younger brother to care for, Maggie coped with this overwhelming stress through controlling food intake and exercise. In her mind, life would be better once she achieved the perfect bo...
2020-12-2631 min
Life Is Love SchoolDating After Divorce— Powerful Mindset To Help You Date With Confidence After A Long Term RelationshipConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Are you terrified of dating because you think you might make the same painful mistake again?
"I don't know where to start" is a common refrain from people newly out of a long term relationship. Dating can fill us with trepidation if we've been out of the scene for a while and we had a track record of heartaches. How do we find a great partner, knowing that the dating pool is rife with liars, cheaters, users, and abusers?
...
2020-12-1331 min
Life Is Love SchoolKnow Your Type: Attachment Style & Relationships with Therapist Diana ChuConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
A question that comes up often in our FB discussions is on dating and Attachment Styles. Per popular request, in this episode, I interview therapist Diana Chu on what attachment style is, how it impacts our relationships, and specific strategies we can employ to move us towards becoming more securely attached.
“A lot of times people who are anxiously attached are attracted to people who are avoidant of attachment. Those two attachment types are like magnets to each other. The trick is not to...
2020-11-2930 min
Life Is Love SchoolFrom The Shadows To Light — My Steps To SobrietyConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Are you an addict or know an addict and wonder what it takes to quit and stay clean? If so, this is the episode for you.
Addicts feel out of control, ashamed, and alone, but statistics show that chemical addiction is sadly common. About one-third of our population suffers from it, and countless more lives are impacted by being with an addict.
My guest today is Dr. Stephan Neff, an anesthesiologist from New Zealand. As Dr. Neff puts it, "I am a...
2020-11-0133 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow To Handle A Toxic Workplace As An Highly Sensitive And Empathetic Person - Interview With Silicon Valley Executive Donald FarmerConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you feel like work is eating into your life? Are you an empathetic, sensitive person but find your kindness being used against you at work? Are you being bullied by a narcissist and unsure who to turn to or what your options are?
So much of our waking hours are spent working, so if our work environment is toxic, it's rather hard to feel happy.
In this episode, I bring my friend and long time mentor Donald Farmer to...
2020-10-1830 min
Life Is Love SchoolFrom Abuse To Triumph — The Inspiring Story Of Dolphin Woodhouse Founder Laura HattConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
When someone sees Laura today, they see a spirited entrepreneur that is married to an English gentleman that adores her. People do not know that Laura had to overcome the unimaginable to get to where she is today. In this episode, Laura shares her story for the first time.
This episode is longer than our typical 15-20 min length; however, I know you will find it time well spent. Parts of Laura’s story touch upon sensitive subjects, such as sexual abuse of a...
2020-10-0334 min
Life Is Love SchoolA Story Of Serial Infidelity (With A Deep Dive On Overcoming Self-Blame)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Have you experienced betrayal by an intimate partner? Kelly Savage thought she married her dream man when she married Don (pseudonym). Don is a smart, well-educated, handsome fellow Canadian who has a glamorous job working with the Canadia embassy in Saudi Arabia, where he regularly interacts with the royal family.
Kelly and Don shared a love for travel and enjoyed a great sex life. Seven years into their marriage, they had triplets. To Kelly and the outside world, they had the perfect mar...
2020-09-2322 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow to Overcome Generation Trauma (With A Deep Dive Into Boundary Setting)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Were you raised by toxic parents and are worried that you might pass the abuse down to your own children? If so, this is an episode you won't want to miss.
In this episode, holistic coach and new mom, Maggie Conrad, shares how she broke the chain to be a good mother to her newborn son. We go into a lot of depth on boundary setting. We cover not just the 'why" but the "how" to do it from our core, so...
2020-09-2019 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow To Work Through Shame To Regain Our LifeConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources: https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Is there something about you that you feel ashamed of and wish nobody found out?
Ben was nine when he was traumatized by an innocuous incident in school. His decision to stuff down, rather than experience the emotions, eventually landed him in the therapist's office for the first time decades later, after losing a significant relationship.
Ben shares his story and the specific techniques he uses to help clients work through blocked emotions to regain freedom. If you suffer from trapped emo...
2020-09-1718 min
Life Is Love SchoolSelf-Love Series: How to Journal for Better MoodConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
The root of many Childhood PTSD symptoms is emotional dysregulation. We all get dysregulated sometimes, and we all eventually return to regulated. However, trauma survivors suffer from more triggers, the amplitude of dysregulation is larger, and it takes them longer to bring emotions back to the norm. For all these reasons, managing emotions well is crucial to thriving post-trauma.
One of the most effective ways to get back to a calm emotional state is to release fears and resentments by taking it...
2020-09-1211 min
Life Is Love SchoolSelf-Love Series: Having a Hard Time Building New Habits? Try habit stackingConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
If you're like me, instilling a new habit is a struggle, and often, after much effort, the new habit did not stick. For the longest time, I've tried to build the habit of meditating, journaling, and affirmations without success. I would start with much enthusiasm, fail, and after a while, I would try again, usually at the start of the new year.
Then I read about habit stacking. It teaches you to stack new habits (ex: meditation) on top of what you...
2020-09-0906 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow a Teen Mom Turned Her Life Around and Got Her Kids Back | Tara BrownConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you have kids but felt that you had failed them as a parent? In this episode, I talk to my friend and coach, Tara Brown. Tara spent the first 30 years of her life suffering from chronic depression and social anxiety. She became a teenage mother that went from abusive relationship to abusive relationship until one fateful day when her kids were taken away from her.
Hear her amazing story of how she turned her life around, and learn the one self...
2020-09-0624 min
Life Is Love SchoolSelf-Love Series: Exactly How Do You Meditate?Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
In the last episode, I covered 6 tips that help you build any habit, using meditation as an example. In this episode, I will go into exactly how to meditate by sharing two methods I use to great effect.
Meditation is absolutely a worthwhile practice to build. Meditation teaches us how to be the observer vs. automatically believing a thought. It also teaches us how to let go of thoughts, so they don't linger and wreak havoc in our lives.
By...
2020-09-0310 min
Life Is Love SchoolStep By Step On Building A Meditation PracticeConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
The benefit of meditation is well known, but building a meditation practice habit is not always easy, especially if you also have a monkey mind like me!
In this episode, I'll go over 6 specific tips that will help you build any new habit, so you can make daily meditation a reality and reap the benefit of a more peaceful and joyful mind.
Here are some items I use in my meditation practice. They're optional but very helpful.
Habit App (htt...
2020-09-0214 min
Life Is Love SchoolLife After Trauma: My Interview with Raj From The On-Call EmpathConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
You're in for a treat!
Raj Montage, the host of podcasts "The On-Call Empath," interviewed me to learn what it was like growing up in Asia with abusive parents. We went into specifics on how it impacts me today, steps I've taken to heal myself, and why I started LifeIsLoveSchool.com to help survivors.
Please subscribe and leave us a review. Your review will help us reach more people. Also, consider supporting us with a small monthly donation so we can...
2020-08-1620 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow To Survive a Difficult Breakup (Part II)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
How do we stay strong after leaving a toxic relationship? Following the last episode, Yumay will give you insights to help you stay strong during the no contact period. For more discussions, join us on Facebook at “Life Is Love School.”
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Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/life-is-love-school/support
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Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/life-is-love-school/support
2020-06-0612 min
Life Is Love SchoolHow To Survive a Difficult Breakup (Part I)Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
How do we stay strong after leaving a toxic relationship? In this episode and next, Yumay will give you insights to help you stay strong during the no contact period. For more discussions, join us on Facebook at “Life Is Love School.”
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Send Yumay a voice message: https://anchor.fm/life-is-love-school/message
Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/life-is-love-school/support
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Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/life-is...
2020-06-0610 min
Life Is Love SchoolTriggered? Here's How To Skillfully Handle ItConnect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
What are triggers, and how do we work with them in the context of a close relationship? If we don’t know how to handle triggers, it can be an area of conflict and misunderstanding.
In this episode, Yumay shares how to recognize triggers and how to communicate what triggers us with our partner skillfully, so we bring them into our world as an alley.
For more discussions, join us on Facebook at “Life Is Love School.”
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2020-05-3111 min