Zach Stewart - Podcast Details

Shows

Good Morning Driftwood Penny's Fury RoadOn today's episode, the gang discuss the dirt-based origins of Dirk's family's names, eclairs, and Penny's Fury Road, a segment in which Penny picks things she wants to "doof." Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago n...

2025-08-1228 min

Good Morning Driftwood I Am Not a Scientist, but I Am a Man of ScienceOn today's episode, the gang pull Dirk back from the edge of an identity crisis and discuss the new wood in town, and science. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope...

2025-08-0523 min

Good Morning Driftwood How He Move Like That?On today's episode, the gang discuss Penny becoming the national poet, Dirk's "hip thing", and an unwitting rabies expert. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be shipwrecked on.

2025-07-2921 min

Good Morning Driftwood FamiLegally and the "Be Cool About This" DefenseOn today's episode, the gang discuss brilliant new TV show premises and legal arguments based on island vibes. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be shipwrecked on. ...

2025-07-2223 min

Good Morning Driftwood Give Us the Laying Hens! - DPT FinaleOn today's episode, the gang attempt to maintain their dignity as they finally conclude studying for the Driftwood Preparedness Test. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be shipwrecked on.

2025-07-1521 min

Good Morning Driftwood In For a Penny, In For a Pound - DPT Part 3On today's episode, the gang discuss unexpected survival tools and Dirk recounts his favorite moment in television history (from the brilliant program "The Knick") as they continue to study for the Driftwood Preparedness Test. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood...

2025-07-0825 min

Good Morning Driftwood Start a Fire and/or Run At It Screaming - DPT Part 2On today's episode, the gang's studies for the annual Driftwood Preparedness Test continue. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be shipwrecked on. On Good Morning Driftwood, hosts...

2025-07-0133 min

Good Morning Driftwood Survival Month Begins! Driftwood Preparedness Test Part 1On today's episode, the gang begin studying for the annual Driftwood Preparedness Test, in which they go over information deemed necessary to thrive in Driftwood. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever...

2025-06-2428 min

Good Morning Driftwood SweetieBeans Is SorryOn today's episode, the gang discuss a candy company's recent industrial accident. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be shipwrecked on. On Good Morning Driftwood, hosts Zach...

2025-06-1721 min

Good Morning Driftwood With Great Power Comes... Whatever You Want to Do With ItOn today's episode, Penny is "taxed" mercilessly by Mayor James Volvo (who is a dog) and the gang discuss Dirk's bid for membership to the World Geographical Society and obtain their superpowers, and Bench's most and least favorite juices. Follow us on TikTok at https://www.tiktok.com/@gmdriftwood and Instagram and @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of t...

2025-06-1026 min

Good Morning Driftwood Chowder Madness and Turkish DelightOn today's episode, the gang talks about milk routines, Driftwood systems of measurements, chowder madness, and literary classics. Ya know, classic radio stuff. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to...

2025-06-0331 min

Good Morning Driftwood Penny Administers Personality Tests from National Geographic Kids to DirkOn today's episode, Penny administers to Dirk a National Geographic Kids personality tests. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be shipwrecked on. On Good Morning Driftwood, hosts...

2025-05-2730 min

Good Morning Driftwood Dirk Found a Falcon and They are Now RoommatesOn today's episode, Dirk tells the gang about a falcon that landed on him on a hike and is now his roommate. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be...

2025-05-2020 min

Good Morning Driftwood The Life and Times of Timmy SmiffsonOn today's episode, Penny showed up to the studio as her alter ego Timmy Smiffson, who happens to be a Victorian orphan boy. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to...

2025-05-1321 min

Good Morning Driftwood Pitbull Court and Penny's List of LoversOn today's episode, the gang discuss important things like sleep trackers, Pitbull Court, how poison was used for cosmetic purposes in olden times, Boston Legal, and Penny's List of Lovers. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6...

2025-05-0633 min

Good Morning Driftwood Sucks to Suck! (Penny's Press Release)On today's episode, the gang discuss a new line of cheese-scented soaps and shampoos, the recovery of a renowned painting that had gone missing, James Volvo visits the studio, and some recent developments in Penny's personal life. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things...

2025-04-2933 min

Good Morning Driftwood Doggie Debate for the Mayor of New Derek (featuring Kimi Jackson and Tom Fraser)On today's episode, the gang host the debate between the two candidates for mayor of New Derek (who are dogs) via their campaign managers (Kimi Jackson and Tom Fraser). Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago...

2025-04-2241 min

Good Morning Driftwood Top 10 Things Pirates of the Caribbean Got Wrong About PiratesOn today's episode, the gang break down the top 10 things that the film franchise Pirates of the Caribbean got wrong about pirates (according to Driftwoodian history). Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could e...

2025-04-1538 min

Not In My Backyard Good Morning Driftwood Preview: Chief Curator Caroline Gesundheit (Kimi Jackson) Joins Us for History DayIf you like Not In My Backyard, you may also enjoy Good Morning Driftwood. On this episode Kimi Jackson (from Not In My Backyard) joins the Driftwood gang as chief curator Caroline Gesundheit to celebrate Driftwood History Day and teach them about Driftwood's extraordinary history. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and...

2025-04-1033 min

Good Morning Driftwood Chief Curator Caroline Gesundheit Joins Us for History Day (featuring Kimi Jackson)On today's episode, chief curator Caroline Gesundheit joins the gang to celebrate Driftwood History Day and teach us about Driftwood's extraordinary history. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be...

2025-04-0833 min

Good Morning Driftwood Theater Critic Margaret Timpson EVISCERATES EVERYTHINGOn today's episode, the gang try to get to the bottom of the robot spiders tying people's shoes together, partake in a heated debate about what a punnet is and isn't, and explore the mind one of Penny's alternate lives. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and...

2025-04-0135 min

Good Morning Driftwood Schrodinger's Bullsh*tOn today's episode, the gang try to adopt out the animal of the week, attempt to identify the most recent mysterious powder sent to the studio, why people's perception of Schrodinger's cat is nonsense, the pickle jingle, and Bench's run-in with a con man. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all...

2025-03-2536 min

Good Morning Driftwood The Mutiny Failed...On today's episode the gang reckon with the aftermath of their failed mutiny and await the outcome of their negotiations with their producer/puppet-master Matthias. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever...

2025-03-1838 min

Good Morning Driftwood Penelope's Feud with Kendrick LamarOn today's episode the gang verify that Bench isn't a horse and discuss the failure of the Conclave to elect a new Grand Admiral, Penelope's prior feud and current friendship with Kendrick Lamar, and the morality of piracy. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd...

2025-03-1130 min

Good Morning Driftwood This Show is a Power VacuumOn today's episode the gang discuss the power of imagination, headshots day at the studio, an eccentric billionaire giving away miniature ponies, and the Driftwood Police Department's plea to help them locate a duck. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood...

2025-03-0440 min

Good Morning Driftwood Décolletage, French Steel Workers, and MontblancOn today's episode the gang discuss whether to go to war with an island of super-intelligent bees, how French Steel workers are weird about doing their own thing, the discovery of a new nut, and Dirk's love of Montblanc pens Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and...

2025-02-2547 min

Good Morning Driftwood The Good Morning Driftwood Awards, The Woodies!On today's episode the gang give out awards to the citizens of The Driftwood Isles for their incredible accomplishments over the past year. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to b...

2025-02-1850 min

Good Morning Driftwood Robert De Niro Has Invaded Penny's DreamsOn today's episode the gang discuss the personas of each finger on Dirk's slappin' hand "The Boys", Big Wet Run and its food offerings, and Penelope's psychedelic dream reality. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago n...

2025-02-1135 min

Good Morning Driftwood Thetis Really Messed Up the Whole Dipping Achilles ThingOn today's episode the gang discuss Greek mythology, the Driftwood New Years Honors List and this year's Beard designations, a new sea shanty karaoke bar, Dirk's gritty Arthur reboot, and the return of wanted criminal Piano Boy. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things...

2025-02-0446 min

Good Morning Driftwood Quicksand Bread BowlOn today's episode the gang discuss whether men and women can scientifically just be friends, Dirk's belief that the mail is lying to him, and the people of Driftwood harboring an escaped convict. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one...

2025-01-2838 min

Good Morning Driftwood Y'all Know Milkis? (I Love You, Milkis)On today's episode the gang discuss Penny's second life as a Victorian orphan boy, the emotional manipulation of the Duolingo owl, and Dirk introduces Penny and Bench to the glorious deliciousness and magic of the world's best beverage, Milkis. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright...

2025-01-2150 min

Good Morning Driftwood STOP DOING POTTERYOn today's episode the gang discuss the shutdown of the mysterious Moonrise Labyrinth, the reopening of the Museum of Wet, and an urgent plea to STOP DOING POTTERY. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations...

2025-01-1431 min

Good Morning Driftwood Catchphrase ThrowdownOn today's episode the gang discuss new catchphrases, a star-studded silent tableread, a cruise ship being turned into a housing complex, and local holiday Johan's Day. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could...

2025-01-0734 min

Good Morning Driftwood Sometimes in Life... (Life Lessons from Cake Day)On today's episode the gang discuss Cake Day and its life lessons, Bench's return to the studio, New Years revolutions, and the Driftwood Dirigible Company's new line of John C. Reilly themed blimps. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one...

2024-12-3143 min

Good Morning Driftwood Penny's Poetry CornerOn today's episode the gang discuss the difficulties of Driftwood's weather cheeses, Jackie Casanova's stolen pants, and Penny's Poetry Corner. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be shipwrecked on.

2024-12-2428 min

Good Morning Driftwood Hunky Mr. ParmesanOn today's episode, producer Matthias has left the gang to fend for themselves to discuss the naturally occurring cheeses of the Driftwood Isles and new recurring segment "Bench's Dumb Place." Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6...

2024-12-1731 min

Good Morning Driftwood Hidden Figures: Missing Climbers, Maritime Murder, and Sexy Museum ArtifactsOn today's episode the gang discuss climbers missing in the Finicky Ridge mountains, new developments in Bench's maritime murder (and love life), and the maritime museum's recent discovery of sexy ancient artifacts. Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of...

2024-12-1046 min

Good Morning Driftwood Murder, Love, Legality, and the Build-A-Bear BoatFollow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss concerning clauses in their contracts, new developments in Bench's maritime murder (and love life), and little Jeffrey Danvers leading Dirk's orphans in commandeering the Build-A-Bear boat. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of...

2024-12-0339 min

Good Morning Driftwood Bench PerDiem, Sleuth at SeaFollow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss the murderous reason for Bench's surprising absence, a town that's being taken over by baby bears, and corporate sponsorship of the moon. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations...

2024-11-2650 min

Good Morning Driftwood Good Afternoon Driftwood (Tick Tock Madness)Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss literary demon possession, a mysterious and possibly mystical boat disappearance, and when bakeries go TOO FAR with trendy creations. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever...

2024-11-1950 min

Good Morning Driftwood L.T.S.J.Follow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss an exciting new food company, the Driftwood Doomsday Bunker lottery, and maritime labor strikes. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be shipwrecked on.

2024-11-1250 min

Good Morning Driftwood Davy Jones DayFollow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss the city's many road closures, Davy Jones Day, and the ongoing Victorian cough outbreak. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be shipwrecked on.

2024-11-0537 min

Good Morning Driftwood Vote for BoatFollow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss Cirque du Lumiere's new literature-based show, a public poll to determine how to spend $20 million, and Bench finally succeeding at walking the plank. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago...

2024-10-2939 min

Good Morning Driftwood Dirk Don't Tell No LiesFollow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss the upcoming gala for the Driftwood Society of Trouser Boys, an important reminder about mold season, and an endeavor to spread fluency of Driftwood's native language. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of...

2024-10-2236 min

Good Morning Driftwood Life & Love in DenialFollow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss Penelope's recent breakup, an exciting Bean Watch! development, and a press release from the Driftwood Isle Police. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to...

2024-10-1535 min

Good Morning Driftwood They're the Captain NowFollow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss Penelope's meltdown while trying to get tickets for the reunion tour of Watering Hole, an exciting development at the Wiley Child's Children's Home, and a phrase Bench has been "hearing around town." Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd...

2024-10-0840 min

Good Morning Driftwood Books on BlastFollow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss the upcoming Salt Fest, a theft from the Driftwood Museum, and books to send up to Fenhuil. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to...

2024-10-0140 min

Good Morning Driftwood Sandwich & ScribblesFollow us on Instagram @gmdriftwood On today's episode the gang discuss why Driftwood is banned from the Olympics, a new TV show based on beloved Driftwood residents Sandwich & Scribbles, and the ongoing hygiene problems of the UDWW marching band. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood...

2024-09-2437 min

Good Morning Driftwood The Town That Cried CornettoOn today's episode the gang discuss a nearby town full of filthy liars, the new era of the Byzantine-Visigoth blood feud, and a tragic twist in fan-favorite recurring segment Bean Watch! Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope...

2024-09-1738 min

Good Morning Driftwood Soap is Where the Clean StartsGMD is live! Good Morning Driftwood, beloved morning radio show of the island nation The Driftwood Isles, finally figured out how to use the internet. On today's episode the gang dive into buffet line bullying, Bench's powder-based gentleman sleuthing, and the grand opening of Driftwood's most exciting new nightclub. Welcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane...

2024-09-1748 min

Good Morning Driftwood Good Morning Driftwood TrailerWelcome to The Driftwood Isles, the weirdest, wildest island nation you've never heard of (because it doesn't exist). On Driftwood's most beloved morning show, hosts Dirk Wiley (Zach Stewart), Penelope MacGuffin (Laura Hotchkiss), and Bench PerDiem (Daniel Kvoras) discuss the events of the day and all the insane, eccentric, and outright absurd things that make Driftwood one of the top 6 archipelago nations you could ever hope to be shipwrecked on. On Good Morning Driftwood, hosts Zach Stewart, Laura Hotchkiss, and Daniel Kvoras improvise in character as hosts of a morning radio show in the fictional country of...

2024-09-1201 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions RumpelstiltskinToday's episode features a tale about an honest guy who gets totally screwed over just because he's a little weird. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all their...

2022-06-2230 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Simple HansToday's episode features a tale about a magical psychopath and a citrus-based paternity test. This one really takes a crazy turn that I was NOT expecting. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are...

2022-06-1526 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Little Snow WhiteToday's episode features a tale about an idiot with a death wish who only survives because she's super hot and the villain is stunningly incompetent. Dive on into this week's story session! Side note: I was recovering from an illness when I recorded this so my voice might be a little wonky. Don't worry, no poisoned apples were involved. Actually, the queen's poisoned apple would've just put me to sleep and helped me rest and recover because (as I cover in this story session) the queen is TERRIBLE at murder! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world...

2022-06-0852 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions King ThrushbeardToday's episode features a tale about when teaching someone a lesson goes way too far. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all their glory. At the...

2022-06-0124 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The FoundlingToday's episode features a tale that about how love (and magical powers) can defeat unexpected (and unexplained) threats of cannibalism. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all their...

2022-05-2527 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Sleeping Beauty (”Briar Rose”)Today's episode features another all-time classic, the insane and nonsensical original version of Sleeping Beauty, originally titled "Briar Rose." Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all their glory.

2022-05-1830 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Six SwansToday's episode features a tale about what happens when you judge people without giving them a chance (your family gets turned into birds and you get burned at the stake for making false cannibalism accusations). Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't...

2022-05-1130 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Old SultanToday's episode features a tale about an overly trusting dog, a wolf mafia boss, and a psycho cat with a limp. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all...

2022-05-0420 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Juniper TreeToday's episode features a tale about a mother's love, a father's cannibalism, and a bird's vengeance. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all their glory. At...

2022-04-2741 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Fitcher’s BirdToday's episode features a tale about a terrible sorcerer and the most audacious disguise ever conceived. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all their glory. At...

2022-04-2031 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Strange Feast & The Wandering of ThumblingToday's episode is another 2-in-1! Two sausages play a game of cat and mouse that reads more like a murderous fever dream, and a fellow the size of a thumb ventures out to get into a series of dangerous shenanigans. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know...

2022-04-1335 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Herr Korbes & The GodfatherToday's episode is a 2-in-1! A group of animals go on a fun trip with shockingly disturbing and dire consequences, and the most prolific sex addict in the world somehow becomes an agent of death. All in a day's work in this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love...

2022-04-0628 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Robber BridegroomToday's episode features a tale about a thief who tries to catfish an entire kingdom and a kingdom with the worst security in history. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly...

2022-03-3023 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The ElvesToday's episode features a trio of tales about the fickle and mysterious lives of elves. One moment they're naked and breaking into your house to save your shoe business, the next they're kidnapping your baby and forcing you to do comedy for a literal monster. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV...

2022-03-2326 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Mrs. FoxToday's episode features a paranoid fox and his bigoted wife in a pair of nonsensical folk tales with very questionable messages. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all...

2022-03-1626 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Tablecloth, the Knapsack, the Cannon Hat, and the HornToday's tale features a greedy psychopath who uses clothes and accessories to instigate wars and destroy the world. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all their glory.

2022-03-0929 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Little Magic Table, The Golden Donkey, and The Club in the SackToday's tale features a lying goat, a passive aggressive bee, a donkey that explodes gold from its orifices, and yet another terrible folk tale father. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the...

2022-03-0243 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Sparrow and His Four ChildrenToday's tale features a family of sparrows that take many different paths to arrive at same conclusion: the life of a bird is a terrifying hellscape. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are...

2022-02-2326 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Hans’s TrinaToday's tale features an old-timey relationship brimming with confusion, terrible communication, and psychological torture. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all their glory. At the end...

2022-02-1615 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Puss in BootsToday's tale features a cat who is a social-climbing conman and an eccentric, completely clueless king who is obsessed with partridges. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals in all...

2022-02-0932 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Clever HansToday's tale features a terrifyingly stupid man and a woman who gives him WAY too many chances. A tale as old as time but with some psychotic morbid details. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you...

2022-02-0234 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Maiden Without HandsToday's tale features a showdown with the devil (who has some surprising loopholes to prevent him from taking your soul), a very strong contender for the competitive title of "worst folk tale father", and a... well, a maiden who doesn't have any hands. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other...

2022-01-2631 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Little Louse and Little FleaToday's tale features a pair of beer-brewing insects who kick off a series of events that ends in panicky, smelly tragedy. Genuinely one of my favorite tales so far. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you...

2022-01-1916 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Devil with the Three Golden HairsToday's tale features an arrogant coward on a dangerous mission... who then gets someone else to do the hard part. Seriously, this guy is the worst. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are...

2022-01-1231 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Singing BoneToday's tale features a compounding series of horrible decisions and another king giving his daughter away as reward for an obscure, arbitrary task. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the grisly originals...

2022-01-0520 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Death and the Goose BoyToday's tale features a depressed goose shepherd who meets the grim reaper and... somehow that makes things better maybe? This tale also seems to imply that if you know how to swim, you and your pets will live forever! Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and...

2021-12-2914 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Little Red CapDid you know Little Red Riding Hood originally had a Part 2? This week's story session features that classic tale of an alarmingly oblivious child and a wolf who REALLY overthinks his plan. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly...

2021-12-2231 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Three RavensThis week's story session features one of the trippiest folk tales I've ever heard and I loved every minute of it. What begins as a young girl's journey to find her lost brothers quickly turns into a horrifying interstellar hellscape. Dive on into this weeks' story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know...

2021-12-1524 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Mother HolleThis week's story session features talking bread, lessons in karma, and yet another awful mother who treats her hardworking daughter like garbage and her lazy daughter like a princess (my theory is that the lazy daughters are way more fun to hang out with). And in this week's adaptation, I take that story and turn it into a modern-day classic guaranteed to make many billions of dollars. Guaranteed, I tell you! Dive on into this weeks' story session. Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart...

2021-12-0817 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Little Mouse, the Little Bird, and the SausageThis week's story session features a tale about an unlikely trio of roommates who have a great thing going... and then ruin it all in spectacularly gruesome fashion. And in this week's adaptation, I take that story and turn it into a slapstick bank robbery flick. Dive on into this weeks' story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies...

2021-12-0118 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions How Some Children Played at SlaughteringCONTENT WARNING: This week's story from Grimm's Fairy Tales features violence that involves children. It's... it's real bad, guys. This week's story session features easily the most disturbing story of Grimm's Fairy Tales up to this point, How Some Children Played as Slaughtering. I honestly can't even bring myself to come up with a funny description. This one's just... super messed up. It was not included in subsequent editions of Grimm's Fairy Tales after the first edition, which would come as a surprise to absolutely no one. You've been warned. Good luck. Welcome to the...

2021-11-2423 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions CinderellaThis week's story session features an all-time classic, Cinderella. As expected, the original version is far messier, bloodier, and more nonsensical than the versions of today. And who knew that everything good that happens in this story is entirely thanks to a pair pigeons? To top it off, the adaptation at the end of the episode turned out to be one of my favorites. All that and more in this week's story session. Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted...

2021-11-1748 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions A Story About A Brave TailorThis week's story session features a tale that begs the question: if someone cons their way into a job but is then AMAZING at that job, are they still a conman? Also: Bickering giants! A pesky unicorn! A wild boar in a church! All that and more in this week's story session. Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV...

2021-11-1235 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Fisherman and His WifeThis week's story session features more talking fish, an insatiable desire for power, and LOTS of lining people up in order of height. All that and more in this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are the...

2021-11-1030 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The White Snake and Journey of the Straw, Coal, and BeanThis week's story session is a 2-for-1! The first is another story that sets unrealistic expectations for what to expect from animals if you do them a single favor, while the second answers the question nobody is asking: "why do beans look like that?" All that and more in this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies...

2021-11-0825 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Herr Fix-It-UpThis week's story session features Herr Fix-It-Up, a tale about a fellow with psychotic levels of confidence who only cares about one thing: get the job done. You can (and should) question his methods and motivations, but you can't question that the guy gets results... horrifying, bloody results. All that and more in this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation...

2021-10-0629 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Hansel and GretelThis week's story session features the classic Hansel and Gretel, that old tale about abandoning children to die in the woods, only for them to be kidnapped by an old witch who can only do food magic and doesn't really seem to be a legitimate threat in any way. I honestly don't know why this was such a difficult situation for the kids to get out of. We'll get into all that and more on this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach...

2021-09-3039 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Nasty Flax SpinningThis week's story session features Nasty Flax Spinning, a tale about a kingdom that revolves entirely around linen, but everyone except the king absolutely hates it. Dive on into this week's story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't the watered-down family-friendly fairy tales you know. These are...

2021-09-2227 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Three Little Men in the ForestThis week's story is The Three Little Men in the Forest, a tale about a girl who stumbles upon three reclusive old men in the forest and somehow that's a good thing? Things promptly go insane and it only gets weirder from there. Dive on into another story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories...

2021-09-1738 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions RapunzelThis week's story is Rapunzel, the first big recognizable name of Grimm's Fairy Tales! Of course, the original is much more twisted and nonsensical than modern retellings and it's debatable whether anything is actually better at the end of the story than at the beginning. I don't want to spoil it, so go right ahead and dive right into another story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and...

2021-09-0831 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Little Brother and Little SisterLittle Brother and Little Sister, the next of Grimm's Fairy Tales, features some classic fairy tale tropes and some new twists - evil stepmother, animal transformations, and ANOTHER king finding a maiden in a tree in the forest! Just when you think you know what's going on, boom! Ghost! And of course it wouldn't be a classic folk tale without a good dose of casual murder. Dive on into another story session! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal...

2021-09-0137 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions RiffraffThis week's episode features the next of Grimm's Fairy Tales: Riffraff, an absolute mess of a tale following two ne'er-do-well chickens who rampage across the countryside subjecting their neighbors to theft, violence, forced labor, and harmful pranks. Also, some sewing supplies get drunk. How? Shut up, that's how! Dive on in! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions. Each week host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and...

2021-08-2625 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Twelve BrothersThis week's episode features the next of Grimm's Fairy Tales, The Twelve Brothers, a tale of a family torn apart by a king's refusal to have both sons AND daughters (apparently it has to be one or the other... the reasons are unclear). Get ready for more of the nonsensical murder we've come to know and love from these stories as well as a whole bunch of twists and turns nobody would ever expect or ask for. Dive on in! Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions! Each week host...

2021-08-1938 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Nightingale & Blindworm, Stolen Pennies, Hand with the KnifeThis week we've got a triple-header! Three short stories all packed into one episode. The origins of an adorable generations-long blood feud! A morally dubious, money-obsessed ghost child! A reclusive, cutlery-lending elf! Unpack all of this insanity and more in this week's story session. Welcome to the dark, strange, hilarious world of The ShadowBear Story Sessions! Host Zach Stewart digs into the dark, twisted, brutal original versions of the folk tales, fairy tales, myths, and legends that laid the foundation for all the movies, TV, and other stories we know and love today. These aren't...

2021-08-1922 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Wolf and the Seven KidsWe continue our journey through Grimm's Fairy Tales with the fifth story in the collection, The Wolf and the Seven Kids. This story is an odd combination of The Three Little Pigs and Little Red Riding Hood. A wolf repeatedly tries to fool seven little goats into thinking he's their mother and letting him into their house, gradually assembling a disguise that involves eating chalk and covering his feet with baked goods while making no effort to hide the fact that he's obviously a wolf and not their mother. Will the seven little goats keep their wits and fend...

2021-07-2824 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions Good Bowling and Card PlayingWe continue our journey through Grimm's Fairy Tales with the fourth story in the collection, Good Bowling and Card Playing. Buckle up, folks. This one's a bloody mess. Simple premise: a king says anyone who can stay in his castle for three nights can marry his beautiful daughter. But the castle-sitter that shows up is a psychopath who chooses violence and verbal taunting at literally every opportunity, and we're somehow supposed to think he's the hero of the story and handles everything perfectly. This story goes completely off the rails real quick. Disembodied legs falling out of a chimney...

2021-07-2826 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Virgin Mary's ChildWe continue our journey through Grimm's Fairy Tales with the third story in the collection, The Virgin Mary's Child. This isn't a particularly religious story and doesn't teach a religious message, so it seems odd to have Mary as a character. Particularly when the story mostly consists of Mary making the child's life a complete nightmare. Abandon the child in a desolate tree in the middle of winter? Yep. Make the child mute? Without hesitation. Kidnap three of the child's own kids when she grows up and things finally start going well for her? Absolutely. This is a weird...

2021-07-2830 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Companionship of the Cat and MouseWe continue our journey through Grimm's Fairy Tales with the second story in the collection, The Companionship of the Cat and Mouse. So many questions with this one: Why would a cat and mouse decide to be roommates? Why would they store their food underneath a church? How many times can a single cat be asked to be a godfather in one summer? Why do cats attend so many christenings? None of these questions are answered and things go about as well as you'd expect when predator and prey become roommates: very very badly. Welcome to the...

2021-07-2820 min

The ShadowBear Story Sessions The Frog King or Iron HeinrichWe begin our journey with Grimm's Fairy Tales, and this week's episode is the first story in the collection, The Frog King or Iron Heinrich. It has all the staples of a classic fairy tale: a princess, a talking frog, attempted murder, and medieval surgical implants for overly emotional friends. This isn't the classic tale of "sweet princess meets her true love and transforms him from a frog into a handsome prince." Nope. The princess is unrepentantly rude, the frog prince is manipulative and demanding, and nobody seems to grow or learn any lessons whatsoever. But one thing is...

2021-07-2825 min