Shows
The Neurodivergent ProfessorNDP Episode 163: How Neurodivergent People Can Learn Healthy BoundariesHave you ever thought about your boundaries? Maybe a therapist told you your boundaries were weak. Or maybe you read something about relationships and how some people might not respect your boundaries. I learned early on that my boundaries are weak. I tend to pay attention to other people’s needs more than my own. Some people in the world will take advantage of this. Many of us struggle to simultaneously love other people while protecting our own needs.As I learn about neurodiversity, I have been thinking a lot about how boundaries rela...
2024-02-0832 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW The Are vs Should Interview Series: Gretchen WinterkornIf you are interested in therapy and coaching. Either for yourself, someone you love, or just because you think it's cool. Gretchen Winterkorn is a wonderful person for you to meet, and you can check out her short video below.I am very lucky to see some cool people doing these KEW interviews, and I really enjoyed listening TO and talking WITH Gretchen. Relevant to the Are vs Should Problem, Gretchen and her family just simplified their lives in a huge way, moving from NYC to a flower farm in upstate NY. Pretty major life s...
2022-01-061h 02The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 78: Assumptions and Core PrinciplesAre you an analytical person? Do you think science is a good way of answering questions? Do you also believe there are things science CAN'T answer?Do you struggle from a mix of pragmatic and spiritual beliefs? Do you consider yourself to be pretty smart?Do you have a strong distrust for the status quo? Have you ever felt like a non-conformist, whether by choice or just because?If you answered any of those questions I think you'll enjoy this episode and KEW in general.My goal is to share a...
2021-12-3131 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW The Are vs Should Interview Series: Neil BjorklundI am extremely excited for you to meet Neil Bjorklund in this week's Are vs Should Interview Series. Unlike most KEW interviews, I knew Neil prior to having him on KEW. But probably not as well as he knows me, as he is my coach.I have worked with Neil for a little over a year, doing somatic healing work using the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model. Neil has all sorts of other training in healing past trauma, improving one's life, and personal growth, but we focus primarily on IFS.I 'discovered' Neil through a...
2021-12-301h 10The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 77: Who is KEW for?As you know, we have been exploring the Are vs Should Problem; the struggle between the people we are and the people we feel like we should be. Since Episode 50, but really since about Episode 42, and ARGUABLY since Episode 1 I have been developing the ideas and concepts that load into the Are vs Should modality.I hope you have found some value in these Episodes.And I hope you will journey with me toward the next Phase of this model developmentIn the next Episode or two, I will go through the pivot...
2021-12-2429 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW The Are vs Should Interview Series: Bruce NachsinBruce Nachsin came to us through a podcaster facebook group. He has his own podcast called, 'The Fattest Fit Kid You Know'. He's super funny, a Hollywood actor, and knows a thing or two about living in your 'Are'. It was incredibly fun (and funny!) to sit and talk with Bruce for an hour or so.Besides just being super funny and entertaining, Bruce has a lot to say about podcasting, changing old habits, and helping each other out in this complicated world. Like I told him, my face was red the whole time from laughing so...
2021-12-231h 24The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 76: Why Am I?You've likely pondered the great, 'Who Am I?' question. But what about the 'Why Am I?'The 'why' is a great question no matter the situation.Of the who, what, when, where, why, and how questions the 'why' is probably the most challenging.Is there a meaning to life?Do you have a purpose?Does anything matter?Hundreds, if not thousands, of philosophers have weighed in on the great question, but I'm not sure there's any consensus.In fact, the 'Why Am I...
2021-12-1731 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW The Are vs Should Interview Series: Paul Gadola (Part 2)What more can I say about Paul Gadola?I'm lucky to know him. I've interviewed him twice for my blog/podcast/YouTube channel.I look at him as someone who has been up the mountain and come back down to share his wisdom with us.I think he'd be a great whatever a pastor/preacher/rabbi is supposed to be.He has written a book you should get from him (because you can't buy one on amazon yet).He's an anti guru anti influencer. He's th...
2021-12-1656 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode75: How Do You Tell the Difference?Do you ever ask yourself this question?I have asked myself this question for as long as I can remember. In fact, I use this argument as a way to justify complaining. It's not a habit I am proud of and I'm working on changing it. But I often find myself getting angry because I can't find a definitive answer to whether something is good or bad or right or wrong.Do you ever get to a point where you truly don't know which option to choose? It's a little bit like Analysis Paralysis, but...
2021-12-1029 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Are vs Should Interview Series: Paul Gadola (Part 1)I told Paul Gadola recently that he had climbed the mountain and returned to share his wisdom with us. In this two part interview series you'll have a chance to see what I mean. From his background in teaching to his childhood thoughts about becoming a spiritual leader, Paul has a natural way of understanding how to help people.He has a gym to help people's bodies: https://www.ironmountain.fitnessHe and his wife have a freshly-prepared meals business to help people's health: https://www.sunmealprep.comHe has written a book...
2021-12-0958 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 74: Self-CompassionIt's taken me over a decade of therapy and introspection to arrive at this Episode. I don't know what took me so long, but 'getting' self-compassion has been a real struggle for me. In the past few weeks a few things have clicked.First, some Miriam-Webster informed verbiage:Self: ha. dare we even try to define that? Even with the help of the dictionary? Hell, why not (only relevant entries included):1: an individual's typical character or behavior2: the union of elements (such as body, emotions, thoughts, and sensations) that constitute...
2021-12-0329 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Are vs Should Interview Series: Paul LevitinPaul Levitin is an ally. He can help you be better at things. Whether it is your body or your mind, Paul is trained to help improve you. And he won't try to sell you anything you don't need. He recommends that you 'interview' him by listening to his Podcast, 'The Healthy Happy Human' to see if you like his style. I like his approach. I like him.Paul answered my request to talk with people who understand The Are vs Should Problem. Paul had a lot to say about how we 'should all over ourselves' and...
2021-12-0257 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 73: What is Stress?Ahh, stress, our bestest buddy. Our forever companion. The voice in our head telling us how much we suck. The ticking clock rushing us to work and home every day.Yeah, you know what stress is, but what is it REALLY? And how can it be so many DIFFERENT things?Can you define it if someone asks you? Beyond whatever it is in that particular moment that is bothering you? Like, generally, what is stress?Well, Mirriam-Webster tell us (or we tell each other) that (and these are the definitions...
2021-11-2627 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Are vs Should Interview Series: Dalton JohnsonThis was a really fun interview. I hesitate to say that, because it implies that not all the interview are fun, but I'm saying it anyway.It's kind of like when people say, 'to be honest with you . . . ', because that implies they are sometimes dishonest.But just watch Dalton Johnson talk and you'll see what I mean. His enthusiasm and sense of humor are infectious. And his story is cool. His storieS are cool. And he has a lot to say about the Are vs Should Problem. Not the least of which was how...
2021-11-2558 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 72: What is Success?If you said 'money' or 'power', you are not alone. Sure, there are lots of different versions of success.Getting a good grade.Getting a raise or a better job.Being invited to a prestigious event.Being revered or treated like a celebrity.But I think we can generally boil down the status quo definition of success to be related to having a lot of money or having a lot of power.Mirriam-Webster tell us:1 : t...
2021-11-1927 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Are vs Should Interview Series: Dawn BatesI found Dawn Bates on a podcast interview facebook site. She was looking for podcasts to do interviews and promote her story. She is a coach, an author, and a genuine warrior. She is on a mission to help people in as many ways as she can. I reached out to her to discuss the Are vs Should Problem, and she agreed to weigh in on the subject.I intentionally didn't learn anything about her, and I'm pretty sure she knew nothing about me or my podcast. What you see in this interview is a n...
2021-11-1854 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 71: SustainabilityFrom the dictionary:1: able to be used without being completely used up or destroyed sustainable energy resources; a sustainable water supply2: involving methods that do not completely use up or destroy natural resources sustainable agriculture/farming/techniques3: able to last or continue for a long time sustainable development/growthHave you ever noticed the hustlers around you? You know, the people working two or three side gigs, driving Uber Eats every evening, and staying incredibly busy? Some of these folks get little...
2021-11-0826 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 70: The Great ResignationHave you heard this phrase yet? In the past few weeks tons of articles have come out that explain the 'Great Resignation' or the 'Big Quit'. According to Wikipedia (yes, it has it's own wiki page) a fella called Anthony Klotz at Texas A&M predicted last May (2021) that people were going to leave the workplace as a result of Covid. And to summarize, very briefly, 'The Great Resignation' is an explanation about the reduced number of people in the workplace during the Covid 19 pandemic.Ok, sure. So more people than usual are not working...
2021-11-0523 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 69: People Suck at Their JobsAt the risk of sounding pessimistic or negative I am sharing my thoughts about a topic near and dear to me. More often than no, I believe people suck at their jobs. I don't think this suckage is always intentional and I do not believe people WANT to suck at their jobs. I am not here to blame individuals for their suckage nor to suggest this is necessarily related to the individuals.My point here is to suggest that there is a problem with the SYSTEM of employment, work, the market, whatever. The arena 'out there' we...
2021-10-2926 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 68: AccountabilityDoes this bother you?You interact with someone at their job, maybe getting a coffee or something. The server is rude, obnoxious, entitled, and unhelpful. Maybe they're even condescending toward you. You may or may not say anything, but, hey, you want your coffee. Maybe you think about it later, but at some point it occurs to you that they were not good at their job in that moment. Maybe it was an isolated event, maybe it was the norm.But what gets me, and maybe you, too, is that they were THERE. Which means...
2021-10-2226 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 67: AuthenticityDefinition of authentic (Taken from Merriam-Webster)1 a: worthy of acceptance or belief as conforming to or based on fact paints an authentic picture of our societyb: conforming to an original so as to reproduce essential features an authentic reproduction of a colonial farmhousec: made or done the same way as an original authentic Mexican fare2: not false or imitation: REAL, ACTUALan authentic cockney accent3: true to one's own personality...
2021-10-1525 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 66: ClarityRemember that time when everything seemed perfectly clear? Yeah, me neither.But once in awhile things DO seem clear. And it feels good. There's no doubt (Episode 28) and things just make sense. Though these moments are fleeting, I think we can learn to maximize the amount of clarity we see in our lives.And by clarity I mean more the ABSENCE of stuff rather than the PRESENCE of something. Clarity, to me, is really just a lack of noice. A lack of disturbance. A lack of . . . . . conflict.So, yeah, clarity is P...
2021-10-0824 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 65: How Do We Know if We Really Know What We Think We Know?To some, this is a ridiculous question steeped in pointless naval gazing. To others, it's a comedic take on people who ask the 'big questions'. To others this is a reasonable assessment of what we want to understand. To me, it's all three at the same time. And maybe that's the point.And like most rhetorical questions, I don't really want to KNOW if I really know what I think I know. Rather, I'm curious about how this questions makes one think a few steps ahead. It's not about what we know. It's about the idea that...
2021-10-0127 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 64: The Forest for the TreesI'm using the Forest for the Trees metaphor to suggest that humans have become exceptionally myopic. The only reason I know what myopic means is because after defending my Master's Thesis a professor proclaimed that I was very myopic - meaning I had a terribly narrow view of the question I had asked and answered. I thought I was being pretty broad and was a bit hurt by his statement, but I also understood his point. I could have taken a 'bigger picture' approach, but by the time I realized that I was too far along to expand my...
2021-09-2424 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 63: The Two Types of ShouldsI recorded this episode after replying to a YouTube comment about good and bad types of change (Episode 61: Change is Hard, but Resisting Change is Wrong). The commenter made a good point that sometimes we change in a bad direction instead of making a positive change.I agreed but in doing so realized I had a bigger point buried under that. Perhaps another assumption I had failed to realize or express. Which is that I believe the Are motivation is essentially driving GOOD change, and that many SHOULD motivators drive a bad kind of change. But an...
2021-09-1725 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 62: Change (cont)Apparently I didn't say quite enough about change in last weeks' Episode 62: Change is Hard, but Resisting Change is WRONG! because when I say down to record this weeks' Episode I just kept talking about CHANGE.Change. It's the one thing we can count on.Since the Big Bang, the universe has been changing. Changing forms. Changing states. Changing composition.All around us, change is driving the universe. The Earth. Our behavior. The seasons. . . . Yet, many of us resist change. We don't like it. It messes up our scheduling. We OBSESS a...
2021-09-1020 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 61: Change is Hard, but Resisting Change is WRONGIn the next few videos I focus on CHANGE. I have covered changing old beliefs, changing the way you think, changing your habits. But it wasn't until Episode 47: Changing Behavior Changes Beliefs that I actually started to realize how critical CHANGE is. Change is the key. The main element. The obvious, yet hidden mechanism of life.One of my chief assumptions is that we we are vehicles for, or at least highly influenced by, our DNA. And change is what our DNA was designed to do. In Episode 55: The Bully and you...
2021-09-0324 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 60: The Are vs Should Problem - Jobs and CareersWhen I was a teenager I realized I would be working for the rest of my life. This hit me like a ton of bricks. This realization LITERALLY left me feeling like I had fallen out of a tree and couldn't catch my breath. Though I'd experienced physical pain by this point in my life, fully coming to understand that I was going to have to spend a significant part of my life doing things I didn't want to do was disturbing.And it wasn't so much that I had to WORK. I didn't mind working. I...
2021-08-2727 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 59: Are vs Should ChallengesDepending on how you define 'uncomfortable', 100-200 million people worldwide can't meet their basic needs. Folks are born into societies and cultures where they are doomed to fail. Millions of people on this planet will live their entire lives worried about dying, finding food, or having a safe place to sleep. These are enormously huge problems that I truly don't understand. Nor do I understand how complicated the solutions are.But I do believe one thing: if we wanted to solve these problems, we could. We could at least make them better. And I truly believe...
2021-08-2025 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 58: Fix the Broken SystemIn this episode I cover two main points:Millions of people have no interest in the Are vs Should Problem because they can't meet their basic human needs for things like food, clean water, and safe shelter.These problems can only be fixed if we live more in the Are and less in the Should.There are no two ways about it, I believe that we need to be more Are, and less Should. I am even starting to believe that the world's biggest problems can only be solved by people who realize their full 'Are' potential...
2021-08-1324 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 57: Multiple PersonalitiesInside each of us are several characters. These parts are all 'us', but they are distinct from one another. What distinguishes these parts is the roles they play in managing our lives. We are, at the same time, the nice guy, the responsible gal, the tactful them. We play many roles in different aspects of our lives. At work we are cordial and diligent. In bed we are adventurous and raw. As athletes we are courageous and assertive. These different roles help us achieve different goals and help us get along with the dynamic and varied people we interact...
2021-08-0626 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 56: DomesticationDon Miguel Ruiz, author of many books including 'The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom (A Toltec Wisdom Book)' uses the term "Domestication" to describe the process by which humans are taught how to live. I have been fascinated by this process, whatever you wish to call it, for as long as I can remember. In fact, I still wonder, often out loud, why no one ever asked whether or not I was agreeing to this social contract. See, we are born into a world that teaches us many things before we even know what's happening...
2021-07-3027 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 55: The Bully and the DNA: Part 2In this second part of the Bully vs your DNA miniseries I describe the DNA part. I will make the argument here, which is a fundamental element of my future work on the Are vs Should Problem, that it is our birthright to express our DNA as fully as possible. I hope you enjoy.For many years I have heard things like, 'Follow your passion!' or, 'if you do what you love you'll never work a day in your life!'. And while I want to love these sentiments, I can't get passed...
2021-07-2324 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 54: The Bully and your DNA: Part 1Last week I introduced a few examples of the Are vs. Should problem. One of the most obvious examples comes up when we think about our careers. When we're young people ask us what we want to be when we grow up. As adults, many of us wonder what became of those childhood dreams when we find ourselves doing jobs we don't like. And I'll argue it's because we listen more to our Shoulds than to our Ares.And this isn't to say that Shoulds are all bad, because I think their intent is honorable. Our shoulds...
2021-07-1626 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 53: Are vs. Should ExamplesAs we move forward trying to discern the gist of the Are vs. Should Problem, I want to describe both the general dilemma and share a few specific examples. Generally speaking, you know you are in the Are vs. Should Problem when you experience discomfort, cognitive dissonance, anxiety, fear, anger, and other uncomfortable emotions. Of course, there could be many causes for these states of mind and it's ALWAYS hard to identify the cause. It's like when my kids get sick I always want to know where and when they picked up the virus or bacteria. We are all...
2021-07-0926 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 52: "Hard" and "Soft" RealitiesAs we pursue the "Are vs. Should Problem" and examine our personal inventory, I want to describe two main ways we can understand ourselves and the realities we live in.First, there is the measurable world. The 'Hard' world where science reigns supreme. Things are measurable, quantifiable, and therefore fit into the well oiled scientific machinery. Problems stemming from economics, medicine, and food supply are easily boiled down into testable hypotheses and theories used to derive definitive results. Other people have described hard problems as being those containing subjects comprised of matter (as opposed to ideas, for...
2021-07-0223 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 51: Personal InventoryOn our journey to define the ARE vs SHOULD problem (Episode 50), we must first define the 'existing conditions'. Like many scientific endeavors (and I'm NOT saying this is a scientific endeavor, rather, that I will take a scientific APPROACH), the Are vs Should investigation needs to know where it's coming from to understand where it's going.And, really, the personal inventory is just that - it defines where we are at the beginning of our adventure. Doesn't every good movie do the same thing? Isn't this really just a classic 'set the scene' device we use to...
2021-06-2521 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 50: The Are vs. Should ProblemThis episode is a milestone for several reasons. One, it's the 50th episode and, for a weekly podcast that means it has been about a year, which is also a not insignificant milestone. For a one-man-band hobby podcaster, that's a pretty good run. When I started KEW I wasn't sure where I was going or what I was trying to accomplish over the long term.And, really, I began asking myself that question around Episode 41 when I announced the 'state of the podcast', which was mostly about changing up a few mechanical aspects like social media and...
2021-06-1825 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Curiosity Interview Series 10: Chris BurcherThis is the final episode in the Knowledge + Experience = Wisdom Curiosity series. I really didn't know what I was getting myself into, whether I'd be a good interviewer, or whether people I did, or didn't know, would have anything interesting to say about Curiosity. Well, I learned a TON about myself and about curiosity, and I hope that these interviews stimulate Curiosity in others.I only knew one of the interviewees personally, and I we had really just met. And I knew little, if anything about the other eight. These interviews represent two people meeting, for the...
2021-06-1120 min
Discover Ignite PodcastEpisode 28 - Chris BurcherThis episode of the Discover Ignite Podcast, "Chris Burcher" features Chris' experience in igniting change into his life through passion. He talks about his hurdles and his approach to uncertainty. Enjoy! Let me know what you think.★ This originated as a YouTube video here: https://youtu.be/FARo8yI3wx4★ Follow me: Website: discoverignite.com | Instagram: @discoverignite | Facebook: Discover Ignite | YouTube: Discover IgniteMindset | Optimization | Perspective--- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/discoverignite/support
2021-06-071h 05The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 49: Who Are You?I mean, really, who are you? No, I mean, really, who are you? Who Am I? Do we know? Do we care?I, for one, think it is important, even CRITICAL to know who I am, and presumably, for you to know who you are. I'm sure there are people out there who disagree with me, but I really can't get my head into that space nor do I think those folks are coming here to read my blog. But I am very interested in knowing about people who neve...
2021-06-0423 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Curiosity Interview Series 9: Marcas HemmilaMarcas Hemmila has lived a pretty full life. He was a leader in the military. He trained for the Mr. Universe competition series. He is/was a computer programmer in the fast paced IT world. And now, he aims to help us discover and ignite our lives.The thing that struck me about Marcas was his authenticity. It's like I tell him in the video, he has a cool combination of vulnerability and 'I think this guy could kick my ass'. Something about that combo makes me trust him.Marcas also has an incredible internet...
2021-05-281h 23The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 48: UnlearningAs I move toward Episode 50 and what I hope to be a major shift in what I'm working toward with KEW, I realize how important Unlearning is. How do we KNOW if we REALLY know what we THINK we know?Well, we don't. But we can think about it. And unlearning comes in to play as a necessary 'next step' for those of us who have ever asked this kind of question. Or questions like:Who am I?What's all this about?What's the meaning of life?Is there life a...
2021-05-2124 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Curiosity Interview Series 8: Bernhard KutzlerIt is my pleasure to introduce you to Bernhard Kutzler (www.bernhardkutzler/en/). After a lifelong career in mathematics, Bernhard went off the grid in a very huge way. He spent nearly 3.5 years in total isolation: away from his phone, tv, people, and all interactions. He forced himself to face his mind in an effort to ask the 'big questions' about being human.Who am I? Why are we here? What is consciousness? Why do I do the things I do?Everyone reading this has wrestled with one or all of these questions, or similar...
2021-05-142h 01The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 47: Changing Behaviors Changes BeliefsBeliefs are things we see as truisms in our lives and regulate the decisions we make. In Episode 9 I talked about Old Beliefs. These are beliefs we learned as kids that protected us in some way, but no longer serve their purpose in our adult lives. The problem is, the old beliefs have been habituated and we continue to implement them. Many of us become aware of our old or limiting beliefs in adulthood. Things like anxiety, imposter syndrome, feeling not good enough, addictions, relationships - all these things are, at least in part, learned when we...
2021-05-0727 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Curiosity Interview Series 7: Dan TassoneFor the seventh installment of the KEW Curiosity Interview series I had the pleasure of talking with Dan Tassone. Dan was introduced to me by our mutual buddy, Brian, who basically told me 'this is one of the most curious cats I know. You HAVE to interview him'. Well, Brian knows me pretty well because Dan was awesome and we hit it off quickly.Dan went to school for a long time (as we do, sometimes) to be a pharmacist, but he didn't become a retail prescription filler. He ended up taking a haphazard journey through some...
2021-04-301h 12The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 46: ValuesIn just about any kind of self help endeavor you will be asked to identify your values. While this sounds pretty easy, the process is far from simple. Turns out we like a lot of stuff. We 'value' many things. The trick is determining your top 3-5 values that truly drive you to live your life. Over the course of ten years of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), or talk therapy, I read and heard a lot about values, but it wasn't until I put some real effort in that I discovered the, well, VALUE, of my values.
2021-04-2324 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Curiosity Interview Series 6: Dan FaillDoing these interviews has been so much fun, and meeting new people (especially during the pandemic) is very nourishing. Getting to meet Dan Faill was no exception. Dan is exuberant, funny, has a lot of wisdom to share, and isn't afraid to be real about it. For years Dan's directed Greek programs for colleges and you can tell he has a direct connection with young people (and he's still pretty young himself). Serendipitously, Dan was invited to speak to a large audience and something clicked. He quickly switched over to inspirational and motivational speaking full time. And h...
2021-04-161h 16The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 45: Career vs. FamilyIn Episode 32: Work/Life Balance I shared my thoughts about how to find time to meet all the various needs we have. In this episode I want to focus specifically on balancing time spent working toward our careers with time spent with our families. And for those of you without spouses or kids, your family can be your parents, siblings, friends, coworkers or any other people you value and spend time with.The main career/family issue I see in nearly all of the Americans I know is the stress associated with spending too much time 'working...
2021-04-0925 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Curiosity Interview Series 5: Dana HumphreyI hope you are enjoying this interview series as much as I am. Dana reached out to me because talking about curiosity sounded interesting to her. And she has some new and interesting points to make about the importance of curiosity in our lives. It's so much fun to listen to other peoples thoughts about how being curious is important to them. We are all unique, and even a simple topic like curiosity can be very diverse.Danas' specialty is helping people realize their self worth and to learn better self love practices. She offers several coaching...
2021-04-021h 02The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 44: Unnatural SelectionI am currently working on a larger project that will connect my background in Ecology and Evolutionary Biology with personal growth, psychology, and finding more joy and fulfillment in our lives. In Episode 43 I introduce some evolutionary evidence that every individual human is born to discover their uniqueness (despite how 'woo woo' that sounds), and how NOT doing so goes against evolutionary theory.The main argument I am making in this episode is that humans have imposed a few other unnatural selection forces upon ourselves. If you watched Episode 43, you will know that the main force I...
2021-03-2622 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Curiosity Interview Series 4: David McRaney of You Are Not So SmartDavid McRaney is the host of the podcast "You Are Not So Smart", the author of a book by the same name, a follow up book called "You Are Now Less Dumb", and is writing his next book about how humans change their minds. His website https://youarenotsosmart.com is so FULL of content that it would be something you'd want to take to a desert island because you'd have a lifetime's worth of entertainment to make you curious.With a background in both journalism and psychology, David THOROUGHLY researches his topics and then interviews the experts...
2021-03-191h 31The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 43: Diversity and UniquenessAs y'all may know, I have always felt a little different. Like an outsider. People in the 80s may have called me a 'nonconformist'. But as an adult I have learned that many people feel this way, at least some of the time. And, like I say in Episode 20: We all feel different (But we're all the same), we all suffer from the imposter syndrome or feeling like we're out of place. It's universal.Part of this, I think, is because we are 'supposed' to be different. The entire purpose of our DNA is to enable each...
2021-03-1220 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Curiosity Interview Series 3: DJ DoranI met DJ Doran when he reached out to interview me about my podcast. We hit it off rather quickly, and of course I had to have him on to discuss Curiosity.In fact, the whole Curiosity interview series was inspired by DJ!See, DJ told me my podcast made him curious, and he's a very curious guy as you'll see. And I realized that I am driven, in large part, by curiosity. It's in my daily life, it's in my music, and it's in KEW. But I had never thought about it, and certainly...
2021-03-051h 13The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 42: SafetyRecently I discovered, or I guess RE-discovered, my 13 year old self around the time I moved from Georgia to Ohio. I figured this was an important time in my life and have always wondered how it might have affected me. By exploring my feelings and thoughts, from my heart instead of my mind, I remembered my bedroom and what it represented.I realized that I had created this spot, at least partly, in response to some experiences with the outside world. See, I was bullied quite a bit as a kid. And I'm not looking for sympathy...
2021-02-2621 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Curiosity Interview Series 2: Mandy NapierMandy Napier resides in Australia where she shares her thirteen years of experience as the 'mindset alchemist', a high performance mindset and executive coach (and via zoom, obviously). She has represented Australia in the international Iron Man competition in Hawaii. After being forced to give up her sport, she focused on getting herself unstuck. She now shares how she did it directly with clients, via several books including, "Creating Healthy Life Habits", and in myriad articles and videos. You can find all of that and more on her website Mindset for Success.I learned about Mandy when...
2021-02-1947 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 41: State of the PodcastJust checking in this week with some observations about KEW. It's been almost a year and over 40 episodes. I've learned a lot and am doing my best to deliver the highest quality content.If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2021-02-1217 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 40: Get Out of Your Head!We, as humans, are comprised of three key components; Head, Heart, and Gut that interact to make up a whole person. When these parts are out of synch, we experience cognitive dissonance - the state of having inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, or attitudes, especially as relating to behavioral decisions and attitude change. A simpler explanation is just to say we are 'out of whack'.Though I understand this concept intellectually, it is only recently that I have learned to connect with my Heart and Gut. I have turned a corner in my therapy and coaching. I am learning...
2021-02-0522 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Curiosity One: Paul Gadola interviewOne of my greatest character flaws is being resistant to people. When I meet new people I often assume they won't like the 'real me' and this often prevents me from developing deep relationships. Sometimes this is protective, because some people might ridicule you or react negatively to who you really are. But the worst result from this type of approach is not giving people a chance. I'm not sure I did that with Paul, but when we first met I didn't see the potential friendship because I was in my protective bubble - and that's on me.
2021-01-2950 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 39: The Growth FallacyWith respect to economics, people often say that you have to grow to stay in business. I heard this a lot when I tried to run my business at a static level of production (i.e., no growth). I found that we actually HAD MORE MONEY left over when we controlled expenses and held production at the level of demand. I discovered that we spent so much money on growth that we were more profitable when we didn't have those line items. Imagine that!So it bugs me when people adhere to that mantra: Grow or Die...
2021-01-2250 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 38: Faith and TrustBecause I grew up without religion, I always thought faith was something you only had for religion things. Later I came to understand faith is something we have when we don't have enough information. Or we don't know the outcome, but we desire a certain outcome. Faith is believing.When I was becoming a scientist, I realized that faith even had a place in that world. Because science rarely proves anything, the people must decide whether scientific evidence means anything or not. We have to believe the evidence. We have to have faith that the evidence means...
2021-01-1548 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 37: Currency of LifeOne of the things I think bout most often is how we have to have a job to earn money to buy the time we want to live our lives. It's like the life we're born with is secretly conditional upon participating in this loop.I'm not angry about it anymore, but I used to be. This forced agreement seemed unfair. Not that I didn't want to work, I just felt violated having my life be conditional upon participation in someone else's system.So after I calmed down, I started thinking about how we measure...
2021-01-0847 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 36 Narcissism & CodependencyAfter my divorce I did some serious soul searching (and therapy) to figure out what happened. I accepted that both parties played a part in the divorce and wanted to understand what happened. Multiple lines of evidence support that my ex-wife became narcissistic and I became codependent. Now, I'm not saying 'she is narcissistic' or 'I am codependent', but our relationship brought out these personality traits and made them pretty severe. I think many people are affected by narcissistic and/or codependent tendencies, and the combination of the two in a relationship can be detrimental to both parties.
2021-01-0152 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 35: Beyond ScienceBefore I 'retired' to stay home with my kids I was an academic research scientist. I taught classes, advised students, and led a research lab. I was pretty successful. The only reason I share that is to say I feel like I've earned the right to explain what science is, and what it ISN'T. In Episode 1 I shared a bit about what science is, and now I want to talk about what it is not.Science is very good at asking questions about things we can measure, but it isn't very good at addressing the unmeasurable things...
2020-12-2545 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 34: SelfWHO are you? WHAT are you? WHY are you? On some metaphysical level we are awareness. We occupy a body on earth that abides by the laws of physics and biology, but what goes on when we think?When I meditate, or even when I'm just making decisions in my day-to-day life, I FEEL like 'I' (whatever 'I' am) comes from a spot in my head that encompasses my brain and my eyes. That's where I picture 'me' to be. But what is this? Some have called it the 'seat of consciousness' and I...
2020-12-1856 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 33: SoulDo we have a soul? If so, what is it? Is it God? Is it Awareness?Though I learned a lot recording this episode, I still don't have a definition. But I think that's because the Soul is beyond human comprehension. We simply don't have the sensory hardware nor the vocabulary to describe it. The Soul is beyond this Earth or these bodies.But I find it SUPER fun to think about.Making this episode took me on an hour long journey through my understanding of life and awareness. I used my Knowledge...
2020-12-1154 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 32: Work/Life BalanceHave you ever felt like a slave to the 40 hour workweek? I know I never signed up for that, but I learned early on that to do the fun stuff I want to do I have to work for money to do it. Sure, I've had some hippie friends who tried a different tactic, and I even tried to pretend I could live on very little if I just didn't spend much. But, yeah, then I got married and had kids and, well, you know the story. Work is a 4-letter word for many of us, but the j-o-b...
2020-12-0456 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 31: ParentingAs a parent this topic is always on my mind. Am I a good parent? What should I be doing with my kids? Are my kids alright? Parenting can kind of dominate your identify if you let it. Especially for primary caregivers. And if you're not a parent, you had parents. Or guardians who influenced you as a kid. So most of us had some sort of parental influence and might even be playing the influencer role currently or in the future.I used to tell new parents that whatever you do is right. Now, that might...
2020-11-2751 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 30: QualityI became sort of obsessed with the idea of quality after reading Robert Pirsig's 'Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance'. Not that it matters but at one time this was the best selling philosophy book in the world. Which is kind of weird because it's really just a story about a guy who goes 'crazy' trying to define what quality is.I'm not trying to drive myself or anyone else crazy, but I think the concept of quality deserves a bit more attention. Mostly because many people confuse quality with 'opinion'. Think about it. W...
2020-11-2054 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 29: GratitudeGratitude is touted as being able to improve an array of human problems. Anger, depression, anxiety, dieting, and other stressful issues have decreased in people who practice out being grateful with some regularity. Psychologists, neurologists, and therapists suggest being grateful as part of any self-improvement plan. But what is it about 'feeling thankful' that produces calm, peace, and satisfaction where before there was anxiety, anger, and suffering? I'm sure I don't know, but this week I talk about gratitude and my experience with very brief gratitude practice. In short, I think practicing gratitude, at the very least, shows us ho...
2020-11-1345 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 28: DoubtDoubt is tricky. A little bit is a good things. Too many of us think we're right all the time - and that simply can't be true. A little bit of doubt is healthy and says, 'hey, i may be wrong here'. Admitting you may be wrong, and doubting your ability to 'know the truth' is healthy. However, doubt can become a lifestyle. Take it from me. I used to fancy myself as a 'Cartesian thinker' or one who 'thinks, therefore, I am'. I told myself that I 'doubted things until I couldn't prove them untrue'. Just t...
2020-11-0650 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 27: The NEW American DreamMany of us bought into the dream of the previous generation; our parents, family, teachers, and other adults in our young lives. We were taught to follow the linear path of good grades -> good college -> good job -> good retirement -> successful life. Then we hit some point in or 30s, 40s, maybe 50s where we question what the hell we got ourselves into.That was a great idea for the post WW2 generation who lived through truly sucky times. And many of those folks followed that dream, got a fat pension, retired at 55, and...
2020-10-3050 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 26: Habits - Why are they so hard to change?Seriously. WTF? Habits are really hard to change. Trying to exercise? Eat better? Cleaning up your potty mouth? It ain't easy. And the crazy thing is, as hard as habits are to change it seems like picking up bad habits is easy.Changing habits is hard stuff. And I’m not just talking about physical addictions or bad habits. Besides just habitual behavior we also have emotional and intellectual habits that could use some modification.I overthink to the point of anxiety – I’d like to change that habit!I have an addiction to nico...
2020-10-2346 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 25: I Suck At . . .I suck at a bunch of things. This video is about how we can have very high ranking values (e.g., be a good spouse, parent, sibling, child) that we often don't live up to. I just wanted to share some of my important values that I struggle to meet. I think we all beat ourselves up too much and often fail to recognize our achievements, and just wanted to call that out. I also get a little tired of people talking about how easy personal growth is and how they have achieved so highly. I think s...
2020-10-1652 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 24: ReligionI grew up in a house without Religion. My parents never went to church and my only experiences with church or religion was attending weddings and funerals. As I grew older I sought a spiritual connection, maybe because I didn't have religion in my life - I don't know.I found spirituality in philosophy and ecology. I also grew to appreciate native spirituality from cultures that pre-date christianity. In short, I've pieced together my 'religion' or 'spirituality' essentially on my own. Here I share my journey and where I am currently with respect to...
2020-10-0954 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 23: Who's Right?Would you rather be right, or happy?It's a good question. It also subtly implies that if you're right, you aren't necessarily happy. I know when I push to 'win' an argument, or to 'be right', I usually feel a little guilty. Certainly not victorious or celebratory. Being right usually means having to tell someone they're wrong.I guess some things have pretty clear right and wrong. 2 + 2 = 4. But one could argue that, for fun and through a discourse, that math is made up by humans and blah, blah. But we can probably agree that some...
2020-10-0251 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 22: TimeTime is our most valuable resource. It's very limiting as we only get maybe 70 or 80 years. And the tragedy is . . . we think it's infinite. Personally, I didn't appreciate time until I was in my mid 40s when I started needing reading glasses. Now I think about it every day.So how do we get more time? We budget better.We think we have no time. But the truth is (and this hurts, I know) that we do. Myself, I am not very good about managing my time. I know WHAT to do, but I can't...
2020-09-2546 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 21: We All Feel Different (But We're All the Same)I hear a lot, from my therapist, other researchers, and articles, that many of us complain that we feel 'different' or 'other' in the context of our immediate communities of friends and families. Here I argue that, doesn't feeling different unite us somehow? Also, that being different is the secret to success for the human race - diversity is the key to evolution! How do we re-contextualize this pervasive feeling to be a superpower rather than a weakness? How do we use this 'suffering' for the greater good? Here I share a few ideas and suggest that we need...
2020-09-1845 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 20: EnoughWhen asked how much is enough, John D. Rockefeller famously replied, "Just a little more". We've all thought this about some things. Whether it's losing 'enough' weight, making 'enough' money, being loved 'enough' we all (mistakenly) believe that if we get 'enough' of 'whatever', we'll be 'happy'. And since a lot of us either want many things, or aren't sure which things we want the most, we tend to maximize 'enough toward everything'. So we end up chasing many 'enoughs' and, even if we get them, we (amazingly) aren't happy.Here I discuss the Law of Diminishing...
2020-09-1150 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 19: AddictionMost of us have some kind of addiction. Whether it's something as benign as Diet Coke, or as life threatening as heroin, we can relate to the pull of being addicted to something. Much of what we talk about addiction is related to the biological or physiological nature. Here I discuss the more psychological aspects of my own addiction to nicotine, talk about childhood loveys and security blankets, and venture toward the concept of Buddhist suffering.If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-09-0436 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 18: Dream BiggerIt's important for us to provide the next generation with effective tools. Recently I heard someone say (I'm paraphrasing) that people in small towns are only allowed to dream as big as their community. I have thought a lot about successive generations and whether we are making great leaps or small steps toward a collective future. Here I follow this lead to some pretty significant (for me, at least) realizations about where we are today as a society (at least in the USA where I live).If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-08-2851 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 17: S.U.C.K. in the U.S.A.I know, the title may be a little harsh. And don't tell me to move. I don't really think the USA sucks in its' entirety. But there are elements of my home country that seem to be changing. But, of course, I'm also changing. It's hard to tease apart what factors may be at work. Is it me? It's not me, it's you. What's going on as I age and my country matures?Here I pose a few questions about how the USA began and where we ended up today. I wonder, couldn't where we are now...
2020-08-1451 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 16: Who Tells Your Story?Eliza Schuyler finally tells her husband's story in Lin Manuel Miranda's "Hamilton". But we'll never really know Hamilton's story, because he isn't around to tell it. And, really, did he even know his story? Do you know yours?Here I argue that it is an important goal of human life to understand who we are and why we do things. To 'know thyself' by the time we die. No one else can know us as well as ourselves, and any 'history' or 'her story' told about us is necessarily inaccurate as it is filtered by someone else's...
2020-08-0755 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 15: Rat RacerThe great Lily Tomlin is credited with saying, "Even if you win the Rat Race, you're still a rat". This phrase has been with me since I saw her on the Carol Burnett show in the 70s. I was young, but I got it. For some reason I've always rejected the idealized model of human 'progress' where you get good grades, get into a good college, get a good job and BOOM! you're happy. I don't know why I'm so objectionable, but I am.And as an adult I see a lot of people who have 'successfully...
2020-07-3136 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 14: What can we learn from COVID?Yeah, COVID sucks, but what if there is something to be learned that can add some positivity to our lives? I believe there is a lot to be learned about our values, our systems (eg, governments), our schools, businesses, and habits. Moreover, we always complain that 'nothing can be changed because it's too hard', like turning a battleship, these systems don't get changed because they're too big. But what if COVID is really an opportunity to change things from the ground up? We are already altering our schooling, our businesses are pivoting, and we are in drastic need of...
2020-07-2444 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 13: SlaveryI realize this topic can be extremely sensitive and controversial. I do not intend to stoke any existing debates about specific or general types of slavery, servitude, or bully labor practices. But I do think about forced labor (not sure what to call it, really) over the past 10,000 years in human society. Here I share my observations about many examples of forced labor, why they are flat out WRONG, and how what we can do as individuals to find a better system. I apologize if I offend anyone who has been victimized by inhuman servitude.If you...
2020-07-1740 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 12: FearIf you break it down and push to the source I think you'll find that fear rules a lot of what we do (and don't) do. Fear drives our decisions and causes our anxiety and depression. Sometimes fear is useful, of course, but many of our problems are caused by fear. I argue these fears can be lumped into two main categories; safety and love. We are afraid of being unloved and of being unsafe. Give this a listen and see if you can correct or augment my thinking.If you are enjoying this content, please tell...
2020-07-1049 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 11: Analysis ParalysisHow terrible is analysis paralysis? Incredibly, I'd say. And it's likely you suffer from it, too - at least sometimes. Not being able to make a decision can be maddening. Here I suggest a few tips and tricks to change your mindset about decision-making. Not to say that I'm an expert, but as someone who suffers from daily analysis paralysis I HAD to come up with some strategies to improve my life. Essentially, I steal some techniques from my philosophy and science training to recast decision making to reduce the pressure we put on ourselves to choose the BEST...
2020-07-0353 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 10: ConnectednessWe ARE ALL connected. Whether you believe it or not. Today more than ever it is critical we move toward understanding that 'fact'. Here I present multiple lines of evidence explaining why I believe all things are connected including a story about me talking to a cuttlefish.If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-06-2652 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 9: Old BeliefsOld Beliefs are things that we learned as kids that helped us get through a hard time. Bullying, loss of a loved one, a broken heart. But as we get older these strategies can break down and not have the effect of making us feel better. Maybe you were bullied and learned how to make people laugh, but found yourself ultimately becoming a people pleaser and developed anxiety about trying so hard. Maybe you learned to get what you want by being a bully yourself. We change as we grow and things that used to help can b...
2020-06-191h 00The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 8: Goals, Accolades, and the Meaning of Life?Getting a job, having someone say yes to a date or marriage proposal, winning a trophy, making good grades, buying a new car - these accolades feel good. Some of life's best endeavors don't provide 'prizes' - like parenting, personal growth, or even dieting. Why are we so motivated to receive praise, win awards, or get paid when many of those things are fleeting. How can we learn to 'esteem ourselves' and feel good about our accomplishments without being told by others we are 'good people'? I discuss how our obsession with money distracts us from honing the skills...
2020-06-1250 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 7: MalenessHere's my take on what it means to be male. I believe in a 'new masculinity' and really dig how some dudes are breaking the mold. I discuss my attitudes toward equality, my time as a stay-at-home-dad, and my outlook on traditional relationships from my point of view.If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-06-0553 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 6: CompetitionThey say it regulates the market and keeps monopolies from taking advantage of consumers. They say it builds winners. They say it's fun. Here I introduce several definitions of competition and suggest it doesn't always do what *they say* it does. Is competition necessary? Is winning the most important thing? I say competition does more damage than good and should be reconsidered as an effective business mantra.If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-05-2948 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 5: Marketing and SolicitationMarketing, Solicitation, and Persuasion. One of my pet peeves is aggressive marketing and consumers being 'tricked' or psychologically coerced into spending their money. I realize this is also the responsibility of the consumer to be informed and make good decisions, but I feel like companies take advantage of and exploit human weakness to sell products and make money. This isn't how it's supposed to work. . . . is it?????If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-05-2248 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 4: Quiet vs. DistractionWhy is it so hard for us to sit quietly with our thoughts? We constantly seek distraction and to 'stay busy'. Research suggests that meditation and mindfulness might be the most important things we can do for ourselves to improve our lives and reduce anxiety, yet it is extremely difficult for most of us. Share your thoughts!If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-05-1529 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 3: Gaming the SystemYou know what this is. Some people 'bend' or outright break the rules and work through loopholes to gain advantages over the rule followers. What is right? Are rules meant to be broken? For example, social distancing - what does essential even mean? Can we all define rules differently and obey or break whichever ones we want?If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-05-0849 min
The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 2: Individuals and CommunityWhat is our personal responsibility to our community? To ourselves? If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-05-0136 min
The Neurodivergent ProfessorKEW Episode 1: Facts, truth, and 'proof'.How do we know if we really know what we think we know? I discuss the differences in facts, opinions, ideas, thoughts, and suggest that we rarely 'prove' anything. There exists some fundamental 'truths' but we are only capable of understanding PART of our world.If you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-04-2436 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorA bit about meIf you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-04-0803 minThe Neurodivergent ProfessorIntroduction to KEWIf you are enjoying this content, please tell your friends.
2020-04-0803 min