Shows
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 41: The art of reinventionStarting again can feel heavy, even shameful, as if beginning anew means something has failed.
But as Tom shares in this episode of Tom's Life Lab, reinvention isn’t weakness; it’s courage in its purest form.
Whether it’s a plan that’s fallen apart, a dream that’s shifted, or a life change you didn’t choose, starting again is part of being human.
Tom explores what it means to rebuild, to release the version of yourself that no longer fits, and to find strength in small beginnings.
Listen now and try...
2025-11-2602 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 40: When life throws a curveballLife has a way of surprising us.
Sometimes it’s a new opportunity, other times it’s the kind of change that knocks the wind out of you.
In this episode of Tom's Life Lab, Tom shares what he’s learned about dealing with life’s curveballs, the moments when plans fall apart and certainty disappears.
He explores why our first instinct to control or fix isn’t always the right one, and how peace comes not from pretending we’re fine, but from feeling what’s real and asking a better question: not “why me?”...
2025-11-1902 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 39: What i'd tell my younger selfIn this episode of Tom's Life Lab, Tom shares the lessons he’d pass on to his younger self, an honest exploration of comparison, courage, shame, and what it really means to feel “enough".
It’s about letting go of the pressure to have it all figured out, learning to trust your path, and finding joy in progress rather than perfection.
Tom opens up about the importance of caring for your body, investing in real relationships, and not letting fear dictate your choices.
Listen now and for this week’s Life Lab experiment, do one t...
2025-11-1202 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 38: Dropping the script: finding yourself beyond overwhelmOverwhelm isn’t always about doing too much, sometimes it’s about being too much.
In this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, Tom explores how the real weight of overwhelm often comes from the pressure to play too many roles. The strong one. The calm one. The one who keeps it all together.
When we try to be everything for everyone, we lose sight of who we are for ourselves. But overwhelm isn’t a flaw, it’s feedback. A gentle nudge from life that says it’s time to pause the performance, drop the mask, an...
2025-11-0503 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 37: Avoidance won’t make the problem go awayThis episode of Tom's Life Lab is all about those conversations we avoid. The ones that sit at the back of our minds like unfinished business.
Whether it's to tell a hard truth, ask for help, or to say sorry, we often tell ourselves that avoiding the conversation means avoiding conflict, but the truth is, avoidance doesn't make the problem go away. Instead, we sit with it, feel the weight of it and allow it to impact our energy and relationships.
Speaking up is rarely easy, but honesty often brings people together where avoidance erodes tr...
2025-10-2904 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 36: Courage over comfort, making new friendsIn this episode of The Life Lab, Tom explores the courage it takes to make new friends. Most people fear rejection but research shows others are more open than we think. Be the one who follows up, sends the message, and takes the step.
Your Life Lab challenge: Reach out to someone you like but don’t know well and invite them for a coffee, walk, or chat. One small act of courage can lead to real connection.
#LifeLab #ConnectionMatters #Friendship #CourageOverComfort #Podcast
2025-10-2203 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode: 35 Be yourself don't sell yourselfIn this reflective episode of the Life Lab, Tom explores the tension between authenticity and performance in modern leadership and life. In a culture that constantly tells us to pitch, polish, and promote ourselves, he asks: What happens when we stop selling ourselves and start being ourselves?
Through personal insight and coaching experience, Tom shares why overperforming can disconnect us from who we are, and why the most powerful leaders are those who show up grounded, honest, present and real.
He challenges listeners to experiment with presence over performance: to trust that the right...
2025-10-1502 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 34: You don't need to fit in to make an impactIn this Tom's Life Lab episode, Tom explains why you don't need to fit in to make an impact.
The feeling of not fitting in can creep in anywhere. Whether it's the boardroom, family dinner table or group chat, it's a feeling that can appear quietly, but powerfully, and it can shape how you show up.
Many of us grow up believing that belonging is about fitting in, but real belonging isn't about sameness; it's about being seen and accepted for who you are.
If you don't feel like you fit in, instead...
2025-10-0803 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 33: Growth comes from pursuing the cringeThis episode of Tom's Life Lab explores how growth comes from pursuing the cringe.
Cringe is the emotional signal that we're brushing up against our edges. It's something most of us instinctively avoid, but if you're never cringing, you're probably not growing.
When we cringe, it's often because we feel exposed, at risk, or a bit awkward; however, the leaders that learn to embrace this feeling, evolve the fastest. They ask questions in a room full of experts, admit when they don't know, and try new formats, even if they don't succeed.
In...
2025-10-0103 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 32: The importance of powerful partnershipsPowerful partnerships are often at the heart of breakthroughs in leadership, business and life. Big leaps forward rarely come from acting alone; they come from leaning into partnerships.
Collaboration isn't just nice to have; it's a necessity. We need people around us who challenge us, support us and see possibilities we wouldn't see on our own. Powerful partnerships aren't just about working together, they're about building trust, showing vulnerability and creating something great.
In this episode of Tom's Life Lab, Tom discusses what makes a powerful partnership work, the benefits of his own partnerships, including B...
2025-09-2403 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 31: Feeling stuck? Don't wait for clarity, make a moveIn this week's episode of Tom's Life Lab, Tom explores the feeling of being stuck and how to move through it.
We all know how it feels to be stuck. When we know something needs to change, but we're not sure what to do next.
Feeling stuck isn't a sign of failure; it's a sign something matters to you; however, problems can arise when we stay stuck, and staying stuck is a choice.
We often tell ourselves we lack clarity, when really what we're lacking is courage. We know what to do, but...
2025-09-1703 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 30: Stop complaining... It's like stirring muddy waterComplaining feels good. We all get tempted to do it, because it can make us feel seen and validate feelings of frustration, but it rarely gets us anywhere.
Whether it's about traffic, the weather, tech issues or company culture, complaining may feel like taking action, but this act alone won't move us forward, and instead causes us to get stuck in a loop where nothing changes.
The energy you bring to your life and leadership sets the tone with others. Lead with complaint, and you invite more of it, which is draining for you and t...
2025-09-1003 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 29: I happen to my life vs. my life happens to meMany of us believe life just happens to us. We react, respond, cope and manage like we are passengers in our own stories. What if we flipped this and, instead, behaved like we happen to our lives?
This isn't about control, it's about agency. The ability to decide how you show up, what you focus on and how you respond in any situation. This shift to 'I happen to my life' doesn't need to be dramatic to be profound, and it may not be easy to start with, but with practice, it will come.
In...
2025-09-0304 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode: 28 Do first impressions really matter?We’ve all heard the phrase: You never get a second chance to make a first impression. But how true is it in leadership and life?
In this episode, Tom explores the importance of first impressions. From the subtle, instinctive signals people read in those opening seconds, to the deeper trust that only grows over time, he challenges whether we place too much weight on the moment, and not enough on the relationship.
You’ll discover:
Why presence is the real currency of leadership.
How authenticity creates lasting influence.
Prac...
2025-08-2703 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 27: Using purpose to sustain performance with Lee RogersIn this episode of Tom's Life Lab, we welcomed leadership expert and founder of Fenton Place, Lee Rogers.
Lee shared his personal weight loss story, the inspiration behind his 'Fit Over 40' campaign, and how this evolved into the 'Fitter4Forties' Instagram channel he runs today.
He explained how he developed the '5 P Model' (Purpose, Plan, Prepare, Perform and Pursue), a goal setting framework he uses regularly, not just on his fitness journey but in his business too.
Lee discussed real life examples of how he uses purpose to sustain performance, citing...
2025-08-1926 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 26: The myth of finished and perfectionist pressureIn this Tom's Life Lab episode, Tom explores the myth of finished. This idea that we'll be enough when we're confident, clear and finally 'get there'.
When we cling to the myth of arrival, we increase pressure on ourselves. We chase certificates, titles and clarity as if there is a 'final' version of ourselves, but the reality is there is rarely a finished product.
Growth doesn't stop as you work your way up, and by embracing uncertainty, you open yourself up to learning and evolving.
Listen to the episode to find out how to...
2025-08-1302 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 25: Influence without control: What to do when relationships feel stuckWelcome to this week's episode of Tom's Life Lab, where Tom discusses how to manage a challenging relationship.
Whether it's with a colleague, boss or family member, if you've ever found yourself thinking, "I just have to live with this" when a person seems unreachable, immovable or uninterested, this is for you.
Whilst it might feel easier to believe you've done all you can, this isn't always true. Influence starts with self-awareness of what you're bringing to the conversation, and what you expect in return.
Focusing on being right over curious? Acting defensively, n...
2025-08-0604 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 24: Competence, rejection, and showing up with integrityThis week's episode of Tom's Life Lab is for anyone who has ever felt like they know they're good at what they do, but they've struggled to get it across to others.
You've put in the work, earned your insight and built your capability, but some of those around you just don't get it or, worse, they ignore or reject it. The gap between knowing what you can bring, versus what others are seeing, is identity-shaking.
If your identity is wound around being capable, then when your competence is met with rejection it can encourage f...
2025-07-3004 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 23: Uncover the meaningful moments hiding in plain sightWelcome back to the Life Lab, where we experiment with life, work, and all the weird and wonderful stuff in between. In today’s episode, we explore how meaning shows up not in the grand gestures or big milestones, but in the small, quiet moments of life, the ones that often go unnoticed.
From late-night sunsets to Lego towers that keep falling over, we look at how to find joy, connection, and purpose in the everyday. We also take this into the world of work, reflecting on the moments that bond teams, build trust, and remind us we...
2025-07-1502 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 22: Lean in for change: Be a bridge, not a lighthouseIn this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, Tom explores a truth every leader wrestles with but few talk about openly: how we show up during times of change. When uncertainty strikes, the instinct can be to pull back, go quiet, or try to “fix it all” behind the scenes. But real leadership isn’t about perfection, it’s about presence.
Tom shares why leaning in (not withdrawing) is the most powerful move a leader can make when their team is navigating challenge. Drawing from personal experience and coaching insight, he introduces the idea of the leader as a bridg...
2025-07-0905 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 21: Stuck in the middle between the starting buzz and the big finishEveryone loves a shiny beginning or a big finish. But what about the bit in the middle? The slog. The self-doubt. The “why did I even start this?” phase.
In this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, we’re talking about the hard yards in the middle, where motivation fades, support dries up, and the grind gets real. Tom shares his own mid-journey wobbles (yep, even with this podcast) and why we need to normalise supporting ourselves and each other during the invisible stretch and through the unglamorous bits.
Whether you’re knee-deep in a big goal...
2025-07-0203 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 20: The value of asking "stupid" questionsIn this podcast episode, Tom is making the case for asking "stupid" questions.
He explains how holding back is often the worst choice, as when we don't ask, we stay confused. By querying, we learn, and so do those around us.
Listen to the episode to understand:
Why we hold back from asking questions
The benefits of caring more about getting something right over looking smart
How to get better at questioning
It's a short episode, packed with actionable insight for you to practice immediately.
2025-06-2504 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 19: Being a treasure hunter for joy can change your perspective with Raquel BraganzaIn this uplifting episode of Tom’s Life Lab, Tom Emery is joined by empowerment coach Raquel Braganza for a conversation about joy, what it really means, how we can cultivate more of it, and why it matters.
Raquel offers a refreshing take on joy as something we actively pursue, rather than something that simply happens to us. Together, she and Tom explore how joy can coexist with other emotions like sadness, how expectations can sabotage our happiness, and why it's so important to build a personal 'menu of joys' to access in different emotional states.
...
2025-06-1632 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 18: From Burnout to Breakthrough with Rob TraczIn this powerful episode of Life Lab, Tom Emery sits down with performance coach Rob Tracz to explore the journey from hustle-fuelled burnout to founding Prime Performance Coaching. Rob opens up about the emotional and physical costs of overwork, the deeper motivations behind his relentless drive, and how reflection helped him reset. They unpack the pitfalls of hustle culture, the role of resilience, and how embracing discomfort can be a gateway to growth.
Rob now works with entrepreneurs and really driven individuals. His coaching methodology focuses on looking good, feeling good, and doing great things.
...
2025-06-1030 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 17 Rumination rewired a toolkit for overthinkersIn this episode of Life Lab, Tom dives into a habit many high performers quietly battle: rumination. If you’ve ever found yourself replaying a meeting moment at 2 am or over-analysing a raised eyebrow in a boardroom, you’re not alone. But what if this pattern of thought wasn’t a flaw, but an untapped strength?
Tom shares a personal story of rumination in an executive setting and explores how the brain’s default mode network, often blamed for anxiety, can also be a powerful tool for creativity, empathy and insight. With a simple 3-step experiment (label it, time...
2025-06-0505 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 16: The comfort of convenience vs. the cost of connectionWe’re more digitally linked than ever—yet so many of us feel alone. With smart assistants, AI-generated replies, and curated feeds shaping our interactions, it’s easy to mistake constant contact for true connection. But is efficiency eroding our empathy?
In this episode, Tom invites us to reflect on what authentic connection looks and feels like, and why it matters. He challenges listeners to embrace the beautifully messy, inconvenient reality of real relationships by trying three practical micro-experiments:
Speaking instead of typing
Responding with curiosity and intention
Having at least one unfiltered conversation
Because in an...
2025-05-2803 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 15: Imposter syndrome, rewriting the inner scriptImposter syndrome affects up to 70% of people (perhaps more) - in this short episode of Tom's Life Lab, Tom delves into this important topic.
Inspired by a recent event at the Fletchers Group Female Lawyers Breakfast Network (FLBN), where Tom hosted a panel on the subject - and was the only male in the room - he details his own experiences of imposter syndrome.
He goes into detail about where these feelings can originate from, the importance of awareness and sharing these experiences, and some ways you can overcome imposter syndrome.
Remember, feeling...
2025-05-2005 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 14: Performance & presence, how letting go helps you go further - with George BettanyIn this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, Tom sits down with George Bettany, founder of the mindful running community Mara and a passionate advocate for presence, performance, and purpose.
They explore the deep connection between mindset and movement, and how running slowly, without judgment, can be one of the most transformative practices for both body and mind. George shares his personal journey from competitive footballer plagued by overthinking to coach and retreat leader helping others find freedom through mindful movement.
It's a rich, honest conversation about fear of failure, letting go of outcomes, and wh...
2025-05-1346 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 13: Finding fulfilment, from struggles to success - with Kevin PalmieriIn this episode, Tom interviews Kevin Palmieri, founder of Next Level University, who shares his transformative journey from struggling with mental health and contemplating suicide to finding fulfilment through podcasting and entrepreneurship. Kevin discusses the importance of asking for help, the power of consistency, and the lessons learned from over 2000 podcast episodes. He emphasises that true fulfilment comes from making meaningful progress towards meaningful goals and the significance of growth and contribution in one's life.
Kevin’s story is a testament to the fact that fulfilment isn’t found in accolades, but in meaningful progress towards meaningful goal...
2025-05-0627 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 12: Conscious living in the modern world - with Stacie ShifflettIn this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, Tom welcomes an extraordinary guest: Stacie Shifflett, multiple international best-selling author, entrepreneur, llama farm owner(!), and passionate student of life. Through her work at Modern Consciousness®, Stacie helps individuals discover their unique treasure map to joy, guiding them to live with greater awareness, purpose, and intention.
The conversation explores how conscious living is not simply about setting goals or chasing achievements, but about creating rich, meaningful experiences that build momentum in life. Stacie’s holistic approach invites people to take the blinders off, reconnect with all 360° of themselves, and embrac...
2025-05-0133 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 11: Culture Cake: The recipe for great culture starts below the icing with Sarah ChadbourneIn this inspiring episode of Tom’s Life Lab, Tom sits down with Sarah Chadbourne, a seasoned HR leader and emerging author, to talk about her bold new project: writing a book called 'Culture Cake'. Drawing on nearly two decades in HR, much of it in the fast-paced world of tech, Sarah shares her unique take on what truly shapes workplace culture.
Using the metaphor of baking, she explains why organisations often get distracted by the “icing” (the shiny perks and branding) and miss what really matters: the ingredients of the cake itself. Things like leadership behaviour, trust...
2025-04-2225 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 10: Acting, Auditions, and Art as a Way of Life – with Matt DragoThis week on Tom’s Life Lab, Tom is joined by actor, storyteller, and creative powerhouse Matt Drago, whose passion for performance, persistence, and purpose shines through in every word.
From humble beginnings in rural Virginia to New York stages and LA film sets, Matt shares his inspiring journey into the world of acting, including the hustle of auditions, the joy of performance, and the life-changing mentors who helped shape his path. We also hear about his latest film Somewhere in Montana, the power of collaboration, and why art—and human connection—matters now more than ever.
...
2025-04-1738 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 9: The Authoritative Coach - with guest Chris MarrChris Marr is the Authoritative Coach and the author of Become an Authoritative Coach: Stop people pleasing, challenge your clients, and be indispensable.
In this candid interview, he shares with me how he was inspired to become a coach and what being the Authoritative Coach really means. We talk about challenging ourselves and those around us and how we can be truly effective in supporting others.
We also go into people-pleasing. What it is, how it shows up, and why it's so dangerous. And because the Life Lab is about exploring life's possibilities, Chris shares...
2025-04-0937 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 8 - letting go: stop wasting energy on the uncontrollableTom's Life Lab: Episode Show Notes
In this episode, Tom explores how to let go of things we can't control and embrace the discomfort of uncertainty. Life doesn’t always go as planned, but learning to focus on what you can control brings peace and clarity.
Why letting go isn’t about giving up
How to stop fighting against the uncontrollable
Real-life examples of letting go with emotions, relationships, and the future
Tom’s personal struggles with rumination and how he stays present
The "control audit" exercise to shi...
2025-04-0204 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 7: It's time to stop buying gym kit and just get to the gymEver found yourself stuck in endless preparation mode; buying all the right gear, researching every detail, and setting up the perfect plan only to never actually take action? In this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, we’re talking about the hidden danger of over-preparing and under-doing.
Whether it’s fitness, a creative project, or a big life goal, preparation can feel productive, but at some point, you have to stop planning and start doing. Plus, I’ll introduce you to the 48-Hour Rule, a simple technique to get you from thinking to doing—fast.
Enjoyed this episo...
2025-03-2703 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 6: Stop talking to yourself like you're nothingIn this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, we explore the powerful impact of self-talk on our emotions, behaviorus, and overall mindset. That little voice in your head? It’s shaping your world every day, whether you realise it or not. If you’ve ever struggled with self-doubt or found yourself stuck in negative thought cycles, this episode is for you.
We break down:
✅ How negative self-talk strengthens limiting beliefs and impacts brain chemistry
✅ The science behind rewiring your brain with positive self-talk
✅ A simple yet effective technique to shift your inner dialogue and build confid...
2025-03-1903 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 5: Go on, try something newIn this episode, Tom explores the power of stepping outside your comfort zone. Trying new things can foster growth, build confidence, and open doors to unexpected opportunities. Tom shares his journey of writing a book, something that started as a challenge but became a rewarding experience.
If fear or self-doubt has held you back, this episode will inspire you to take the leap.
Key takeaways:
Growth happens when we challenge ourselves.
Fear of failure is normal—focus on learning, not perfection.
Small steps can lead to big changes.
Tom’s book-writing journey taught him resi...
2025-03-1202 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 4: the value of taking a chanceHave you ever hesitated to reach out to someone—whether it’s a mentor, a potential connection, or an old friend—because you were afraid of rejection or didn’t know what to say? You’re not alone. But what if that one message could change everything?
In this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, we’re exploring:
Why reaching out is a small action with big rewards
How to make it easier (without overthinking!)
Some of the best opportunities, friendships, and collaborations start with a simple message. Tune in to learn how you...
2025-03-0503 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 3: How to ask for what you need - even when it feels uncomfortableIn this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, we dive into the OI-4C framework, a simple and structured way to communicate your needs with clarity and confidence—without unnecessary emotion or assumptions.
Key Takeaways:
✅ OI-4C Framework – A step-by-step approach to asking for what you need:
Observation – state the facts neutrally.
Impact – explain how the situation affects you.
Curious – open a dialogue instead of making demands. Change – suggest an action to improve things. Continue – reinforce what’s working well. Challenge – encourage the other person to step up.
✅ Real-Life Examples...
2025-02-2604 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 2: The transformational impact of being intentionalAre you living on autopilot, simply reacting to life’s demands?
In this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, we explore how being intentional—about your time, energy, and decisions—can bring more clarity, purpose, and fulfillment. Learn how small, conscious choices can help you take back control and create a life that aligns with what truly matters.
Key Takeaways:
Being intentional means making conscious choices rather than letting life happen to you.
Focus your energy where it actually matters—your time, relationships, and mindset.
A simple Daily Check-In Exercise can help you set intentions...
2025-02-1903 min
The Tom’s Life Lab PodcastEpisode 1: Learn to love anxietyIn this episode of Tom’s Life Lab, we dive into something we all experience: the anxiety of life. Whether it’s the weight of uncertainty, the pressure of the future, or emotions from personal and professional relationships, anxiety can feel overwhelming. But what if, instead of fighting it, we leaned into it? Join Tom as he explores how we can navigate anxiety in a healthier way.
Key Takeaways
Understanding anxiety
Anxiety is a natural human response to uncertainty.
It often sneaks up unexpectedly and can feel overwhelming.
The key is to recognise that anxiety itself isn’t the pr...
2025-02-1403 min